Why She Stayed

In this survivor story, Tiffany opens up about the hidden layers of abuse she endured in her marriage- abuse she didn’t initially recognize. Growing up with a father who was a “standard yeller,” Tiffany assumed that abuse had to look loud and obvious. But her husband’s tactics were quieter, calculated, and far more confusing. Through gaslighting, and emotionally charged setups that left her yelling, he was able to make Tiffany feel unbalanced and “crazy,” all while maintaining a calm exterior.Tiffany shares how focusing on her husband’s drinking became a smokescreen that kept her from seeing the deeper issue: his abusive behavior and personality. We discuss how the messaging in Al-Anon (encouraging partners to examine their “control issues” and “character defects”) often reinforces an abuser’s narrative and shift responsibility onto the survivor.We also dive into how church counsel commonly misses the mark when addressing abuse. Tiffany explains how recommendations like “temporary separation” can actually aid the abusive partner by giving them a checklist to complete in order to regain access to the marriage, while the victim is framed as the one dismantling the family.This episode sheds light on the subtle, often invisible dynamics of emotional and psychological abuse- and the systems that unintentionally enable it. Tiffany’s story is a testament to the strength it takes to recognize abuse, break through confusion, and reclaim one’s reality.Guest details are private for now. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this solo episode, we dive into one of the most overlooked reasons people remain stuck in abusive cycles: the inability to name what they’re experiencing. I explore how the lack of clear language- not just individually, but across society- keeps people confused, doubting themselves, and trapped far longer than they should be.We unpack the cultural habit of mislabeling harmful behavior, and how this reluctance to “call it what it is” creates conditions where abuse can thrive in plain sight. I break down why accurate terminology isn’t just semantics- but a lifeline.Together, we reframe abuse not as a spectrum where people try to measure what “counts,” but as an umbrella of behaviors rooted in the same belief system of entitlement, control, and disregard. By understanding abuse as a unified framework rather than a sliding scale, we remove the ambiguity that keeps so many people questioning their reality.Articles and writings mentioned: Maine Case: https://cbn.com/news/us/judge-orders-maine-mom-not-take-her-daughter-church-or-read-her-bibleAlyssa Wiest Article: https://www.nbcphiladelphia.com/news/local/michael-dutkiewicz-guilty-of-first-degree-murder-death-girlfirend/4287021/Ohio Article: https://nypost.com/2025/11/21/us-news/deranged-husband-kills-baby-wifes-7-year-old-and-the-boys-father-before-turning-gun-on-himself/Black Blouse Coercive Control: https://x.com/shadows_control/status/1805945219344486824?lang=en Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, I sit down with Hannah to explore abuse that is intentionally designed to be unrecognizable. Hannah shares how her abuser strategically created gray areas and emotional ambiguity, making it almost impossible for her to pinpoint what was happening.She also talks about the “threshold” she carried in her mind- her preconceived idea of what “real abuse” was supposed to look like- and how her abuser deliberately stayed just below that line. This left her constantly second-guessing herself, blaming herself, and feeling unable to trust her own perception.Together, we unpack why this type of abuse is so confusing, how abusers use subtlety as a tactic, and the internal conflict survivors experience when their reality doesn’t match the stereotypes of abuse they’ve been taught.Guest information private for now. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, I’m joined by Dr. Jaime Zuckerman, a nationally recognized clinical psychologist who specializes in narcissistic abuse and relationship trauma. Together, we dive deep into one of the most painful and confusing stages of recovery- learning to detach from the abuser’s narrative.We explore questions so many survivors wrestle with: Will the abuser change for the next person? Why does it feel like they’re thriving while you’re left in pieces? And most importantly, how can you begin to reclaim your truth after so much manipulation and emotional chaos?Dr. Jaime Zuckerman's links: LinkTree for all links: https://linktr.ee/drzpsychologist?fbclid=PAZXh0bgNhZW0CMTEAAad7NNTCigjpDAiBeChMvfyAgR-y93OH9X-jCXHbD55VYt9YJaT1_SxIKA5wwQ_aem_YPJ2kBTJJcEnBmKCKOSYkwInstagram: https://www.instagram.com/dr.z_psychologist/Dr. Z's podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/1aeBenKtsnHZcAMy4JekqP Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this powerful and deeply personal episode, Catherine opens up about the years she spent trapped in an abusive marriage marked by emotional abuse, infidelity, and alcohol use by her former spouse. What began as a hopeful relationship spiraled into something she never imagined when she discovered her husband’s shocking attempts to secretly poison her with abortion pills in an effort to end her pregnancy.With courage and honesty, Catherine shares how she uncovered the truth, the steps she took to protect herself, and the journey toward rebuilding her life after trauma.Together, we talk about the complexities of abuse, the warning signs that are often overlooked, and the strength it takes to break free.Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions of domestic abuse, substance abuse, and physical harm through abortion pills.For more about Catherine's story, please visit her social media pages and links related to her story: Socials: @catherinepresslyherring@sayhmfoundationArticles:https://www.nbcnews.com/news/us-news/texas-attorney-poisoned-pregnant-wife-abortion-medication-sentenced-18-rcna138065https://www.shreveporttimes.com/story/news/2024/03/06/shreveport-senator-files-bill-after-sisters-husband-tried-to-secretly-abort-baby-with-abortion-pill/72863621007/https://sbaprolife.org/newsroom/press-releases/the-catherine-and-josephine-herring-act-heads-to-gov-landrys-desk Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, I’m joined by Wendy as she bravely shares her story of surviving abuse and how it manipulates your sense of duty, love, and identity.Wendy opens up about how her abuser made her feel responsible for his well-being, and how that emotional weight kept her trapped in a cycle of guilt and silence. We explore why so many survivors feel sorry for the very people hurting them, and how that misplaced empathy is a product of manipulation by the perpetrator.We also dive into the more subtle and often overlooked signs of financial control, the ways abusers rationalize physical violence, and how Wendy’s experience as a Latina woman added a layer of cultural confusion around expectations, and what it means to “stand by your man.”This conversation is a testament to resilience, clarity, and the power of naming what we’ve survived.Wendy's Instagram: @wendyc0rtes Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, I sit down with Alissa to talk through the painful reality of surviving not one, but two abusive relationships, and the patterns that emerged between them.We dive into the emotional and financial toll of being made to feel responsible for the very people who were hurting us. Alissa shares how she was expected to take care of her abusers- emotionally, financially, and even physically, all while her own needs were ignored or weaponized against her.We talk about:The quiet, creeping signs of financial abuseHow abusers make us feel like the caretaker or the problem-solverThe excuses they give for physical abuse and how we learn to rationalize themEarly signs of stalking and how they’re often misread as “love” or obsessionThe red flags that were different in each relationship- and the ones that felt eerily familiarIf you’ve ever asked yourself “How did I end up here again?”, this episode is for you. Content warning: This episode discusses abuse, stalking, and physical violence. Please listen with care.Alissa's Instagram Pages: @makeituncomfortable@absolute_gray_mediaOther creator (Kimya) mentioned in the episode:@kimyamotley Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

"I didn't think it could happen to me."In this deeply personal and courageous episode, Beverly Hallberg — founder and president of District Media Group — shares her powerful story of surviving abuse. What began with subtle glimpses of control eventually unraveled into something much deeper, finally exposed by the unimaginable loss of her baby.As we acknowledge Domestic Violence Awareness Month this October, Beverly’s story is a vital reminder that abuse often wears a mask - and that mask can be both convincing and devastating. Through her long-form essay and now this conversation, she sheds light on how abuse can be insidious, and how leaving is never easy — but healing is possible.This episode is for anyone who has ever questioned their reality, felt isolated in their grief, or needed to know they are not alone.Beverly's Substack post: "How Losing Our Child Exposed the Depth of My Husband’s Abuse and Gave Me the Strength to Leave"https://open.substack.com/pub/beverlyhallberg/p/how-losing-our-child-exposed-the?utm_campaign=post&utm_medium=webBeverly's social media & sites:districtmediagroup.comX: @BeverlyHallbergInstagram: beverlyhallbergFacebook: BeverlyHallberg Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This is a solo full Q&A episode where I answer the following questions: 1.) How long did it take for you to no longer feel the need for him to see your worth? 2.) How to not care that you're painted as the villain by abuser?3.) How do you get over the discard, and how happy they seem to be doing it to you?4.) How to stop spiraling when they seem to be giving the next partner everything you wanted.5.) How can one break out of cognitive dissonance when in the thick of it?6.) When the abuser claims to have PTSD, is that a reason/ excuse for abuse?7.) Sleep abuse/ abuser claiming to have "violent dreams"8.) Did u/anyone u speak with feel like their abuser was gay and that's why they hated women?9.) Is it real love when he goes to the extreme of doing crazy stuff to show undying love?10.) How to support a friend who says they know it's abuse but they're not scared of him?11.) How to deal with people who just don't get it12.) Your opinion on a relationship/marriage between a believer and an atheistArticles & other creator credits: Abusive Men Describe The Benefits of Violence: https://voicemalemagazine.org/abusive-men-describe-the-benefits-of-violence/Creator's post mentioned: @healingbythenumbers on InstagramGrace's Instagram: @gracestuart26 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Alexis Ruhlen and I discuss life post- abuse as a part 2 episode. We cover topics such as: emotions that come with reporting our abusers to law enforcement, dealing with the opinions of others, survivor imposter syndrome, how long it took us to make progress, and breaking the bond for the final time.Lex's original podcast episode of her FULL story is episode #18. If you would like to follow Alexis or I, please see our socials below:Lex's IG: @lexruhlenGrace's IG: @gracestuart26 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

On this episode, Lynn and I speak about topics such as sadistic behaviors, sexual abuse/ boundary pushing, and how abusers coerce you by giving the illusion of choice. To work with Lynn or send her a message, please see the links below: Lynn's Website: https://www.echoismrecovery.com/Lynn's Instagram: theechochamber2024 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

On this episode, Monica Smith shares pieces of her abuse story and detailed examples of how an abuser grooms us to no longer trust our own inner dialogue and perceptions. We talk about how they slowly make themselves the only source of truth we feel we can rely on and why it's so hard to believe ourselves. Monica's Instagram: @monicamooresmithMonica's Tiktok: @monicamooresmith5 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Taylor shares her abuse story and how her reality became completely distorted and shaken over time. We discuss how she was made to feel like the offender and how she was often recorded, shamed, and blamed as a form of control. We discuss topics of emotional, financial, & sexual abuse throughout the episode. Guest details will be private for now until further notice. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

On this episode, I am joined by podcast host and abuse recovery coach Laura Richards. Laura is the host of That's Where I'm At Podcast and we dive deep into both the addictive nature of the cycle of abuse and her personal story. We speak about the trauma bond, gaslighting, and abusers who frequently talk to other women as a form of punishment. If you would like to get in touch with Laura, visit her social media pages:Instagram: @thatswhereimatpodcastTikTok: @thatswhereimatpodcastPodcast: That's Where I'm At Podcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Nicolette shares about the emotional, psychological, and sexual abuse she faced in her marriage and how minimizing, denying, and blaming made it so hard to see through the fog. We discuss how abusers will often seem very forthcoming and honest about their "past" struggles and use their honesty as a distraction to their current behavior. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Erin shares her abuse story of enduring physical, emotional, verbal & financial abuse. She describes how her abuser blamed the mistreatment on "stressors" and kept her in a cycle of hoping it was always just about to get better. Erin's Instagram: @love_doesnt_destroy Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sarah shares her story of the many years of abuse she endured throughout her marriage and how spiritual and emotional abuse played a big role in keeping her trapped. She also shares how she navigated with 3 children including one special needs child and how she clung to her faith even when it was used against her as manipulation. Lastly, we discuss when an abuser says they didn't "mean" to hurt us and why it is still intentional abuse. If you would like to connect with Sarah she has provided her Instagram below:@hopperbunch4 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Christa shares her story of experiencing high forms of covert abuse and how that led to a complete mental breakdown and loss of self. We dive into many examples of manipulation and how she eventually saw through the fog, overcame the confusion, and walked away for good. If you would like to get in touch with Christa, please see her Instagram below:@christarealba Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

On this episode, Jess shares her story about how abusers can weaponize mental health claims as an excuse to accuse you and gain control in very covert ways. We also discuss how perpetrators who are very charismatic triangulate people around them to feed into the manipulation and lies. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

On this episode, I am joined by trauma therapist and abuse recovery coach- Quinn Padilla. We discuss topics such as what is a "one-off" mistake vs. a pattern, intent vs. action, and how an abuser will attempt to control the narrative. Get in touch with Quinn: Instagram: @itsquinnpadillaWebsite: https://www.itsquinnpadilla.com/Grace's socials: Instagram: @gracestuart26 @whyshestayedpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.