Welcome to Part One of a powerful and deeply honest conversation with The Gay Sex Coach, Allen Marion. In this episode, Brian Janes and Mark Dembo dive into what it truly means for gay men to reclaim their sexual and relational power—especially after years of shame, guilt, and conditioning rooted in religious upbringing and minority stress. Together, they explore how shame compounds over time, often lingering long after coming out, and how it quietly fuels self-sabotage in dating, intimacy, and relationships. The conversation unpacks the complexities of sexual exploration, monogamy, and non-monogamy, while emphasizing the importance of slowing down, getting clear on personal desires, and letting go of heteronormative rules that no longer serve. Brian, Mark, and Allen also examine the realities of dating apps—ghosting, response times, emotional expectations, and intentionality—and why understanding your own emotional state before engaging online is crucial. They discuss the role of masturbation in relationships, normalizing it as a healthy form of self-connection rather than a taboo, and introduce the idea of a “relationship rule book” to prevent misunderstandings and unmet expectations. Throughout the episode, body image, self-perception, and the dynamics of casual sex and fuck buddies are addressed with nuance and compassion. At its core, this conversation is about authenticity: learning to communicate honestly, sit with ambiguity, and build connections rooted in self-acceptance rather than fear or performance. This episode sets the foundation for deeper exploration in Part Two—inviting listeners to reflect, unlearn, and reclaim their power with intention. Coming inside OUT is a safe space where listeners can find solidarity, inspiration, and the courage to embrace their true selves. Whether you're a gay father, gay parent, a person exploring your identity, or an ally seeking to understand the experiences of the LGBTQ community, this podcast is for you. Tune in for heartfelt conversations, insight and a sense of belonging that we all crave. Join your hosts, Brian and Mark, as they candidly share their own journeys out of the closet while navigating the joys and challenges of parenthood as openly gay fathers. In each episode, Mark and Brian connect with fellow gay dads, sharing their inspiring stories, victories, and struggles. They delve into the complexities of grappling with sexuality, discussing their experiences as teens, husbands, and dads. Together, they aim to foster a supportive community for those still in the closet, reassuring them that they are not alone in their journey. Join us on this journey of love, acceptance, and authenticity! Contact us at cominginsideout@gmail.com #gay #lgbtqpodcast #lgbtq #pride #gaymen #loveislove #gayfathers #gaydad #comingoutstory #TheGaySexCoach Keywords: gay men, sexual power, relational power, religious upbringing, shame, guilt, self-sabotage, sexual exploration, monogamy, communication, authenticity, dating apps, ghosting, emotional expectations, response times, intentionality, masturbation, relationship rules, body image, self-perception, fuck buddies Takeaways: Helping gay men reclaim their sexual and relational power is crucial. Religious backgrounds often instill shame around sexuality. Minority stress affects the mental health of gay individuals. Shame and guilt can persist even after coming out. Self-sabotage manifests in various ways in relationships. Letting go of past conditioning is essential for authenticity. Exploring sexual identity requires understanding one's desires. Finding community can be challenging for gay men in small towns. Communication is key in defining relationship boundaries. Masturbation should be normalized in relationships. Apps can provide access to community but should be used intentionally.