Uncomfy: Sticking with Moments That Challenge Us

When’s the last time you took a hard look at your own side? Political columnist and foreign policy expert Shadi Hamid joins Uncomfy to talk about the difficult, often painful process of changing your mind — especially when it means challenging the people on your own side. Hamid, once an outspoken critic of American power and an anti-war activist, now argues the opposite in his new book, “The Case for American Power.” In this episode, he opens up about: - His post-9/11 political awakening - Why he went from protesting U.S. power to believing it’s sometimes the only moral option - Cognitive dissonance around U.S. foreign policy - Why progressives shouldn’t give up on influencing American power from within - How we can disagree deeply while still living together in a democracy Shadi Hamid’s new book, “The Case for American Power” - https://www.simonandschuster.com/books/The-Case-for-American-Power/Shadi-Hamid/9781668031889 Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/12/from-anti-war-activist-to-defender-of.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:45 Introducing Shadi Hamid 01:34 Shadi Hamid's Formative Years and Political Awakening 04:23 The Evolution of Shadi Hamid's Views on American Power 07:37 The Role of Identity and Experience in Shadi Hamid's Perspective 11:08 A Call to Action for Progressives 15:39 Conclusion

When Tucson mom Rachel Scholes stopped to help a homeless woman on the side of the road, she didn’t know what to do next. Years later, she learned that her small act of kindness had changed a life forever. This heartwarming true story reminds us that no act of service is wasted even when it feels small or inconvenient. This episode is part of the “Light the World” initiative, a global invitation from The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints to spread light and serve others during the holiday season. Learn more and find ways you can serve at https://www.lighttheworld.org/. Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/12/i-picked-up-stranger-and-it-changed.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:11 Light the World 00:40 Rachel's Story: An Ordinary Morning in Tucson 01:30 Meeting Jackie 03:01 Bringing Jackie Home 09:15 The Unexpected Reunion 13:20 Reflections on Service and Faith 16:03 Conclusion

This week, we’re sharing something a little different on Uncomfy. Our host, Julie Rose, joins Michael Lee on his podcast When We Disagree—a show about arguments, why we have them, and what they teach us about ourselves. In this conversation, Julie opens up about one of her deepest regrets: a long-running disagreement with her late mother over what news she watched. It’s a raw, personal reflection on how our emotions can block us from seeing the people we love with compassion and curiosity. Listen to more episodes of When We Disagree - https://whenwedisagree.buzzsprout.com/2311101 Connect with Julie on social media - https://linktr.ee/i_am_julie_rose CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction to Uncomfy and When We Disagree 04:02 Julie's Story – A Disagreement with Her Late Mother 12:01 Reflecting on Regrets and Lessons Learned 22:42 Conclusion

Is it possible to keep heated political debates from devolving into name calling and ugliness? In this episode of Uncomfy, host Julie Rose sits down with Idaho public education Alexis Morgan. Morgan shares how The Dignity Index reshaped her approach to conflict—especially during Idaho’s heated debate over a controversial school voucher law. From moderating tense town halls to facing opponents in court, Alexis opens up about the emotional toll of advocacy, how she bridges divides without backing down, and why she believes dignity isn’t just a tool but a mindset. In this episode: - The Idaho school voucher fight and what it reveals about political division - How The Dignity Index helps people disagree without dehumanizing - Real-world examples of turning tension into understanding - Why treating opponents with respect might be the strongest strategy of all Alexis Morgan is former president of the Idaho state PTA and host of the Purple Zone podcast. Learn more about The Dignity Index: https://dignity.us Listen to The Purple Zone: https://www.thealexismorgan.com/the-purple-zone Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/11/fighting-for-what-you-want-without.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Intro 00:51 The Heated Debate on Idaho's School Voucher Law 01:23 Introducing Alexis Morgan 01:57 Uncomfy Moment at a Town Hall Meeting 05:21 Handling Conflict with Dignity 07:49 Discovering The Dignity Index 14:23 Applying Dignity in Advocacy 18:39 Outro and Additional Resources

What if you could disagree with someone — even someone who attacks your beliefs — without losing your cool or your dignity? Tim Shriver, chairman of Special Olympics International and co-creator of The Dignity Index, joins host Julie Rose to unpack how contempt creeps into our conversations and how to replace it with curiosity, humility, and respect. Together they explore: - What “The Dignity Index” is and how it evaluates our dialogue - Why we often find contempt hiding inside ourselves - How to respond with dignity when someone lashes out - Why kindness isn’t weakness but power Learn more about The Dignity Index: https://www.dignity.us Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/11/can-we-disagree-without-contempt-tim.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:38 Meet Tim Shriver: Special Olympics and The Dignity Index 03:48 Understanding The Dignity Index Scale 07:51 The Power of Words and Dignity 08:51 Responding to Personal Attacks with Dignity 13:54 Changing the Culture of Contempt 17:21 Conclusion

What does it really take to make your voice heard in Congress? In this episode, Host Julie Rose talks with Sam Daley-Harris, founder of RESULTS and Civic Courage, and Jay Butera, the citizen advocate who helped create the bipartisan Climate Solutions Caucus in Congress. Jay shares how he spent three years hearing “no” before finally convincing one Republican member of Congress to say “yes” to working across the aisle on climate change. Sam explains how transformational advocacy—showing up, building trust, and listening deeply—can turn ordinary citizens into powerful changemakers. Sam’s book, Reclaiming Our Democracy: Every Citizen's Guide to Transformational Advocacy - https://reclaimingourdemocracy.com/ Get in touch with Sam – https://docs.google.com/forms/d/e/1FAIpQLSdCQuqj-4O2eh4Sfy_E-dfVntbPlqg1A4T4oQ8E2J0nuZbD-w/viewform Climate Solutions Caucus - https://climatesolutionscaucus-garbarino.house.gov/ Top of Mind episode on what to do if you’re feeling unheard by Congress - https://www.byuradio.org/feeling-unheard-by-congress-heres-what-you-need-to-know Subscribe for more stories about growth, discomfort, and courage! CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:38 Meet Sam Daley-Harris and Jay Butera 01:14 The Birth of the Climate Solutions Caucus 02:07 Challenges and Breakthroughs in Advocacy 05:33 Building Relationships in Congress 08:09 The Turning Point: Congressman Curbelo's Involvement 12:06 Impact and Reflections on Advocacy 17:49 Final Thoughts and Encouragement

What happens when you walk across America with nothing but a backpack, a mandolin, and a sign that says, “Walking to Listen”? Host Julie Rose sits down with author and restorative practices consultant Andrew Forsthoefel to explore the power of vulnerability, the discomfort of rejection, and the surprising beauty of human connection. Andrew shares stories from his 4,000-mile journey — from receiving a knife and a warning not to trust anyone, to being invited into a forest camp by strangers offering cookies and apple juice. He reflects on how discomfort can be a gateway to growth, and how listening can be a radical act of love. Andrew now works with public schools to lead restorative listening circles, helping students and educators build trust, navigate conflict, and foster belonging through vulnerability. Learn more about Andrew’s work and writing at https://littlecourtyard.substack.com. LISTENER SURVEY - https://forms.cloud.microsoft/r/yi9fSNB8NG What does vulnerability mean to you? Have you ever leaned into discomfort and found something powerful on the other side? Share your story with us at uncomfy@byu.edu or on Instagram @uncomfy.podcast. CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:36 Meet Andrew Forsthoefel: Walking to Listen 01:06 The Journey Begins: Early Encounters 02:16 Lessons from the Road: Trust and Vulnerability 06:58 Facing Rejection and Hostility 12:13 Special Request: Listener Survey 12:41 A Society That Respects Vulnerability 14:30 Restorative Listening Circles in Schools 19:56 Conclusion 20:57 Special Request Reminder

When Anne Abel hit an all-time low at 59, she never expected a Bruce Springsteen concert to change her life. After years of battling severe recurrent depression and losing her memory to electroconvulsive therapy, Anne found a spark of hope in Springsteen — a spark that led her to travel alone to Australia for eight concerts in five cities. That trip became the start of a new life filled with courage, creativity, and connection. Now at 72, Anne is a storyteller, author, and social media creator with nearly a million followers, inspiring others to keep going when life feels impossible. Learn more about Anne’s new memoir, “High Hopes,” and her other work: https://anneabelauthor.com. Follow Anne on social media (@annesimaabel): https://linktr.ee/anneabel How do you handle the self-critical voices in your head? Or what’s something scary you’ve done lately that took real courage? We’d love to hear from you! Share your thoughts in the comments, email us at uncomfy@byu.edu, or connect with us on social media. LISTENER SURVEY - https://forms.cloud.microsoft/r/yi9fSNB8NG Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/10/how-bruce-springsteen-saved-my-life.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:38 Meet Anne Abel 01:41 The Life-Changing Bruce Springsteen Concert 03:31 A Journey to Australia: Finding Hope 05:12 Daily Struggles and Coping Mechanisms 6:48 Midroll for Listener Survey 7:16 Challenging Self-Critical Voices 12:35 The Power of Storytelling and Social Media 17:45 Conclusion

Should politics be off-limits in church? Reverend Clay Stauffer doesn’t think so. Two months after a member of his congregation was killed in The Covenant School shooting, Rev. Stauffer invited his community to gather in their sanctuary for a discussion about gun violence — a conversation most churches would rather avoid. Host Julie Rose talks with him about what compelled him to do it, why he believes churches should be “big tents” where people with different views can still talk and stay connected, and how avoiding politics in church might actually make divisions worse. They also explore why people of faith might be especially equipped to lead with empathy and peace. Clay Stauffer is the senior minister at Woodmont Christian Church in Nashville, professor of moral leadership at Vanderbilt University, and author of “What the World Needs Now: Virtue and Character in an Age of Chaos.” Learn more about Dr. Stauffer’s work at https://claystauffer.com/. What do you think? Should faith and politics mix or stay separate? Tell us in the comments, connect with us on social media, or share your thoughts at uncomfy@byu.edu. Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/10/should-political-conversations-be.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:44 Meet Reverend Clay Stauffer 01:13 The Role of Church in Political Conversations 02:34 Addressing Political Violence and Incivility 06:15 Gun Violence and Community Safety 08:59 The Intersection of Faith and Politics 10:58 The Rise of Political Partisanship 12:58 Finding Solutions in Faith 14:11 Conclusion

Have you ever struggled to be understood? Matt Maxey spent most of his childhood trying to fit into the hearing world. He went to speech therapy, avoided sign language, and thought leaving Deaf culture behind was the only way to succeed. But when he showed up at Gallaudet University — the country’s only Deaf university — he suddenly found himself in a place where everyone expected him to use ASL, a language he didn’t even know, and many labelled him as an outsider. Instead of giving up, Matt flipped that struggle into his purpose. He went from resisting sign language to becoming one of the most well-known ASL music interpreters in the world. As the founder of DEAFinitely Dope, he’s brought hip-hop to Deaf and hard-of-hearing audiences, toured with Chance the Rapper, and even interpreted at the 2025 Super Bowl halftime show with Kendrick Lamar. Matt Maxey’s organization, DEAFinitely Dope - https://deafinitelydope.org/ Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/10/becoming-hip-hops-biggest-sign-language.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:40 Meet Matt Maxey: Founder of DEAFinitely Dope 01:12 Matt's Journey with Sign Language 04:14 Challenges and Acceptance at Gallaudet University 07:53 Breaking Barriers with Music Interpretation 11:41 Collaborating with Chance The Rapper 14:36 Impact and Future Goals 16:12 Conclusion

What happens when a parent refuses to let a diagnosis define their child? TV news anchor Leland Vittert shares his story of growing up with autism, the “tough love” lessons his father insisted on, and how those moments of discomfort shaped the man and reporter he became. In this conversation with host Julie Rose, Vittert opens up about bullying, rejection, resilience, and the powerful role his father played in teaching him to adapt to the world rather than expecting the world to adapt to him. Leland Vittert is the Chief Washington Anchor at NewsNation and host of “On Balance with Leland Vittert.” Before joining NewsNation, he spent a decade as a foreign correspondent and anchor at Fox News. His new memoir is "Born Lucky: A Dedicated Father, A Grateful Son, and My Journey with Autism," available now https://www.harpercollinsfocus.com/harper-horizon/born-lucky/. Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/10/growing-up-with-autism-and-fathers.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:40 Meet Leland Vittert 01:38 The Role of a Dedicated Father 02:31 Facing Bullying and Social Challenges 03:34 Early Signs and Diagnosis 05:30 Overcoming Social Struggles 11:34 The Impact of Autism on Journalism 14:19 Reflections and Final Thoughts

“People don't actually follow outrage; what they follow is what is unique and different.” Host Julie Rose talks with Manu Meel, co-founder and CEO of BridgeUSA, about how a new generation of college students is challenging the outrage economy, especially in the wake of the tragic assassination of Charlie Kirk. Meel explains that while conflict and violence often dominate headlines, the real counterculture movement is people hungry for respectful dialogue and pluralism. He argues that listening itself has become a radical act, one that could reshape democracy by empowering the “silent majority” to push back against polarization. Manu’s organization, BridgeUSA – https://bridgeusa.org/ Manu’s podcast, The Hopeful Majority – https://www.thehopefulmajority.com/ Don’t forget to subscribe for more conversations that challenge, stretch, and inspire. Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/09/political-violence-and-power-of.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:46 Introducing Manu Meel and BridgeUSA 01:10 Discussing the Assassination of Charlie Kirk 02:28 The Mission of BridgeUSA 03:23 Challenges and Critiques of Bridging Efforts 06:30 Outrage vs. Dialogue in the Attention Economy 07:40 The Viral Impact of Constructive Dialogue 11:16 Building a Culture of Pluralism on Campus 15:49 Empowering the Silent Majority 18:44 Conclusion and Call to Action

“There is another way.” Julie Rose sits down with Sulaiman Khatib, two-time Noble Peace Prize nominee and co-founder of Combatants for Peace. As a teenager, Khatib, a Palestinian, was imprisoned for attacking Israeli soldiers. But behind bars, he discovered the power of nonviolent resistance, studying the works of Gandhi, Mandela, and Martin Luther King Jr. Today, he works side by side with Israelis to build trust, tell hard truths, and imagine a future of collective liberation for Israelis and Palestinians. With the conflict in Gaza entering its second year, Sulaiman Khatib’s story is a rare glimpse of hope. Sulaiman’s organization, Combatants for Peace – https://www.cfpeace.org/ New documentary featuring Combatants for Peace, “There is Another Way” – https://www.thereisanotherwayfilm.com/ Subscribe to Uncomfy for more stories of people leaning into life’s hardest, most uncomfortable moments. Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/09/from-prison-to-peace-sulaiman-khatibs.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:55 Meet Sulaiman Khatib 02:20 Life in Prison and Embracing Non-Violence 04:18 Founding Combatants for Peace 05:30 Building Trust and Overcoming Barriers 06:49 The Power of Storytelling 08:28 Combatants for Peace: Actions and Impact 10:42 Hope for Collective Liberation 16:24 Conclusion

“I had a need to tell him how I felt. I wanted him to feel some of my pain.” Amanda Carrasco, restorative justice advocate and author of "Becoming the Brave One: My Journey to Justice," shares her story of choosing to have a restorative justice meeting with the man who killed her closest friend, Susan, who had taken Amanda in as a teen and become like a sister to her. In this powerful conversation with host Julie Rose, Amanda explains what restorative justice really is, why it’s not “soft on crime,” and how the process helped her release fear and reclaim her voice. Learn more about Amanda’s work and new memoir - https://amandacarrasco.com/ Check out the “Top of Mind” episode on the purpose of prisons and their role in the justice system - https://www.byuradio.org/1267d7ae-9f9b-48f8-b005-b7814846ccb6/top-of-mind-with-julie-rose-what-is-the-purpose-of-prison Share your Uncomfy story with us - uncomfy@byu.edu Follow us on Instagram - https://www.instagram.com/uncomfy.podcast Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/09/sitting-down-with-my-best-friends.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:42 Meet Amanda Carrasco: Restorative Justice Advocate 00:57 Understanding Restorative Justice 01:46 Amanda's Personal Story: A Journey Through Pain 05:06 The Restorative Justice Meeting: Preparation and Experience 08:12 The Impact of the Meeting: Fear, Healing, and Forgiveness 12:47 Rethinking Justice: Beyond Punishment 15:40 A Vision for Restorative Justice 17:44 Reflecting on Justice and Healing 18:09 Outro and Podcast Recommendation

What makes someone fit to parent? In this episode of Uncomfy, writer Jessica Slice shares her story of becoming disabled at 28, learning to let go of perfectionism, and eventually embracing motherhood in her own way. Jessica talks about the obstacles she and her husband faced while trying to become foster parents, how she adapted parenting to her body, and why disability doesn’t equal tragedy. Check out more of Jessica’s work - https://www.jessicaslice.com/ Jessica’s latest book, Unfit Parent: A Disabled Mother Challenges an Inaccessible World - https://www.jessicaslice.com/books Subscribe to Uncomfy for more honest conversations every Wednesday. Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/09/how-disability-made-me-better-parent.html CHAPTERS 0:00 Introduction 0:34 Meet Jessica Slice 1:40 Becoming Disabled at 28 3:33 From Perfectionism to Parenthood 5:45 Finding Joy Within Limits 7:40 Being Better Prepared for Parenthood 9:36 Challenges with Becoming Foster Parents 12:04 Bringing Baby K Home 14:00 Parenting Adaptations 16:28 Rethinking Disability and Parenting 18:43 Closing Reflections

What if your parents didn’t believe your life’s work was a priority issue? Planet Reimagined’s Caleb Johnson knows what that’s like. Growing up in a conservative evangelical family, climate change wasn’t exactly dinner table conversation. But a wildfire that came to their doorstep, and later losing their fire insurance, changed everything. In this episode of Uncomfy, Caleb shares how empathy helped him bridge that divide, why local stories matter more than abstract science, and how his work at Planet Reimagined uses concerts (yes, concerts!) to spark real climate action. Learn more about Planet Reimagined - https://www.planetreimagined.com/ Share your own “Uncomfy” story – uncomfy@byu.edu Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/08/how-concerts-can-turn-fans-into.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:45 Meet Caleb Johnson 01:03 The Intersection of Music and Climate Activism 02:51 Bridging Climate Divides with Family 06:39 Empathy in Climate Conversations 09:46 Planet Reimagined: From Understanding to Action 10:44 Amplify: Turning Concerts into Climate Action 14:58 Success Stories and Future Goals 18:21 Conclusion and Additional Resources

What happens when love crosses the political divide? Host Julie Rose sits down with “Band of Brothers” writer and producer Erik Bork to talk about his directorial debut, “The Elephant in the Room” — a romantic comedy where a Liberal and a Trump voter fall for each other. Inspired by Erik’s real-life friendships and fueled by a desire to explore America’s deepening polarization, this episode dives into the uncomfortable but necessary conversations around politics, relationships, and empathy. Check out “The Elephant in the Room,” available to rent digitally now - https://www.elephantintheroomfilm.com/ Are you in a mixed marriage of political ideology? Tell us about it – uncomfy@byu.edu Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/08/band-of-brothers-writer-tackles-love.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Episode Introduction 01:12 Introducing “The Elephant in the Room” 01:28 Inspiration Behind the Film 05:48 Challenges of Writing Cross-Partisan Characters 08:34 Balancing Perspectives in the Film 14:01 Hopes and Takeaways from the Film 15:54 Conclusion and Call to Action

“We're not moving on — we're moving forward.” In this touching episode of Uncomfy, grief coach Melissa Bottorff-Arey opens up to host Julie Rose about losing her 21-year-old son Alex to suicide, and why she chose to name it in his obituary. Melissa shares how stigma, silence, and misunderstanding compound the pain of suicide loss, especially for mothers. She explains how simply showing up, even when you don't know what to say, can make all the difference, and how separating a person from the way they died can be a crucial part of healing. Melissa’s website and podcast, The Leftover Pieces - https://www.theleftoverpieces.com/ If you or someone you love is struggling, please reach out. Call or text 988 to reach the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline, free & available 24/7. Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/08/the-pain-of-suicide-loss-and-power-of.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Content Warning 00:25 Introduction 01:07 Meet Melissa Bottorff-Arey 01:21 Discussing Suicide Openly 04:20 Misconceptions About Suicide 08:19 Normalizing Suicidality 10:40 Supporting Grieving Mothers 13:15 Alex's Legacy 14:37 Conclusion and Resources

When was the last time you did a small act of kindness for someone else? In this episode of Uncomfy, award-winning journalist Nicole Karlis shares the surprising story that inspired her book, Your Brain on Altruism: The Power of Connection and Community During Times of Crisis. What began as an unusual, uncomfortable challenge from a Vedic astrologer in India turned into a life-changing exploration of how serving others impacts our mental, emotional, and even physical health. Learn more about Nicole’s book – https://www.nicolemkarlis.com Has someone shown you a little kindness lately? Share this episode with them! Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/08/why-small-acts-of-kindness-matter-more.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:45 Meet Nicole Karlis: Journalist and Author 01:05 The Origin Story: A Journey in Rishikesh 02:05 The Prescription: Acts of Kindness 04:18 Exploring the Science of Altruism 07:00 The Benefits of Small Acts of Kindness 10:27 Imagining a Caring Community 11:51 Conclusion and Call to Action

Why do so many patients feel dismissed by their doctors? In this episode of Uncomfy, orthopedic surgeon, podcast host, and FeelBetr founder Dr. Erin Nance pulls back the curtain on what really happens when doctors get it wrong and why it’s more common than we’d like to believe. From unconscious bias and misdiagnoses to the fear of admitting mistakes, Dr. Nance shares a rare, insider perspective on the discomfort many doctors face and the harm it can cause. She uncovers uncomfortable truths about the medical system, how patients can advocate for themselves, and why humility might be the most powerful medical tool we have. More from Dr. Erin Nance: Social media – https://www.instagram.com/doctorerinnance/ (Instagram) https://www.tiktok.com/@littlemissdiagnosed (Tik Tok) Book, Little Miss Diagnosed: A Surgeon’s Guide to Mending Bones and Breaking Rules – https://www.harpercollins.com/products/little-miss-diagnosed-erin-nance-md Podcast, The Medical Detectives – https://www.themedicaldetectivespodcast.com/ Health-focused social media platform, FeelBetr – https://www.feelbetr.health/ Have you chosen to own up to a mistake lately? Share your story with us - uncomfy@byu.edu Subscribe to Uncomfy for more powerful conversations! Episode transcript - https://uncomfypodcastbyu.blogspot.com/2025/07/your-doctor-might-be-wrong-what-can-you.html CHAPTERS 00:00 Introduction 00:41 Introducing Dr. Erin Nance 01:06 Doctors Make Mistakes: Acknowledging Human Error 02:36 A Personal Story of Bias in Medicine 05:16 Addressing Bias and Improving Patient Care 08:02 The Role of Social Media in Medical Awareness 09:33 Defensive Medicine and Patient Trust 11:52 FeelBetr: A Platform for Health Literacy 14:44 Conclusion and Final Thoughts