The Kink Consultant

Not sure what to expect on a kinky cruise? You're about to find out, and it's way more fun (and safe) than you think! In this episode, I’m not just going to have one, not two, but four guests! I sit down with Lee from Concasions and the powerhouse team behind Carnivale Risqué (Tank, Goddess Ellez, and Obsidian) to talk about what it's really like on a kinky cruise. These industry veterans have been teaching kink at lifestyle parties for over a decade, and they break down how they turned empty dungeons into packed playspaces by making BDSM approachable, glamorous, and fun. We dig into the upcoming Kinky Cruise in April, what to expect as a first-timer, how consent culture creates the safest party spaces, and why "swingsters" (swingers + kinksters) are now a whole community. They also get real about living as a throuple, teaching workshops on unleashing your authentic self, and why vulnerability is the sexiest thing you can bring to any relationship.This episode is part prep guide, part inspiration, and 100% permission to explore. If you've been thinking about attending a lifestyle event or just want to understand what makes these spaces so magnetic, this conversation will get you ready to dive in.Don’t let the Kinky Cruise sail without you! Go to http://www.kinkycruise.com and use the code TKC50 to get $50 offDownload the Bliss Cruise app and Celebrity Cruise app to plan your scheduleConnect with Tank, Goddess Ellez, and Obsidianhttps://carnivalerisque.com/https://www.instagram.com/carnivalerisque/https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=100063613538670Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/https://www.amandadames.com/thereadinglist

Better sex isn't a luxury, it's accessible. And if you're not exploring what's out there to improve your intimacy, you're leaving pleasure on the table.In this episode, I get to sit down with Jeff Abraham, CEO of Promescent, for an honest conversation about sexual wellness, performance anxiety, and why 70% of people using delay spray don't even have premature ejaculation, they just want better sex. Jeff shares his unexpected journey from semiconductor engineering to running a sexual wellness company, and breaks down the real stats on the "arousal gap" (spoiler: the average man lasts 5 minutes and 42 seconds while the average woman needs 18 minutes). We dig into why delay products have gotten a bad rap, how Promescent's formula is different, and what Vita Flux can do for blood flow, libido, and natural lubrication. Jeff also gets real about communication, foreplay that starts hours before sex, and why vulnerability is the foundation of great intimacy.This episode is practical, sex-positive, and full of solutions. If you want better connection, longer-lasting sex, or just want to level up your intimacy game, this conversation will give you the tools to do it.Want longer-lasting sex without losing sensation? Get 15% off at Promescent.com/tkc15Episode Highlights:00:00 Changing the Conversation Around Intimacy27:34 Exploring Sexual Frequency and Refractory Periods29:19 The Impact of Good Intimacy on Attraction31:38 Addressing Anxiety and Intimacy33:30 Menopause and Women's Sexual Health35:36 Innovations in Female Arousal Products40:21 The Rise of Male Masturbatory Products53:58 The Importance of Communication in Sexual RelationshipsConnect with Jeff Abraham https://www.linkedin.com/in/technicalresources/https://www.promescent.com/Connect with Amandahttps://www.amandadames.com/https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/Joins the Couples Retreathttps://www.amandadames.com/BetaWaitlistDownload the BDSM Checklist Here: https://www.amandadames.com/resource_redirect/landing_pages/2151620560Join the Kinky Book Club:https://www.amandadames.com/offers/H3LbqfTw/checkoutCourses and Resources to Help Your Kink Journey: https://www.amandadames.com/store

Non-monogamy isn't actually that complicated…our fear of talking about it is. And that fear keeps way too many people stuck pretending they want something they don't.In this episode, I sit down with Samia Mounts, creator and host of the ClosetEd podcast, for a raw conversation about non-monogamy, jealousy, and why emotional maturity matters more than the number of partners you have. Samia shares her journey from believing in "the one" to discovering she's wired for multiple loves. We talk about her marriage that became a friendship, navigating new relationship energy, and the difference between boundaries and control. She gets real about the mistakes she made, the red flags she ignored, and what it takes to build trust when relationships shift.If you have ever felt like you were meant to love more than one person and had no idea what to do with that truth, this conversation is for you.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Why Everyone Is In “The Closet” and Society's Norms12:17 Polyamory and Personal Experiences32:42 Defining Relationship Agreements and Boundaries34:54 Navigating Non-Monogamous Relationships42:19 Polyamory vs. Consensual Non-MonogamyConnect with Samia Mounts https://www.samiamounts.com/https://www.instagram.com/samia.mountshttps://www.youtube.com/channel/UCBkJT8ttJYCyIS8ig6gZ7pAhttps://www.tiktok.com/@samia.mountshttps://www.samiamounts.com/podcastBook a Consult with Amanda Here:https://www.amandadames.com/book-a-consultConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

What if intimacy didn’t have to feel so hard, awkward, or overthought?In this episode, I sit down with Danielle Harel and Celeste Hirschman, the founders of the Somatica Method and the two people who completely changed the way I understand intimacy, sex, and relationships. We talk about what Somatica actually is, why it feels so different from anything most of us have ever learned about intimacy, and why practicing connection in real time can be deeply transformative.This episode is personal for me. Somatica is the training that helped me become The Kink Consultant, and it reshaped how I show up in my body, my relationships, and my work. If you have ever felt stuck in your intimacy, overwhelmed by shame, or curious about a more embodied, human way to connect, this conversation gives you a real look at what is possible when everything is allowed to be talked about, explored, and met with care.Episode Highlights 00:00 What is Somatica?11:03 Understanding Somatica Sessions24:49 Understanding Core Wounds in Relationships27:54 Application Process for Somatica Training35:23 Virgin Island: A New TV Show40:53 The Impact of Social Media on IntimacyLearn more about Somatica:https://www.somaticainstitute.com/https://www.instagram.com/somatica_institute/https://www.instagram.com/celesteanddanielleofficial/Become a Certified Somatica Coach: https://www.somaticainstitute.com/ Use TKC250 to get $750 off!Join the Couples Retreat! https://www.amandadames.com/couples-retreatOrder Playground Miracle Melts here! https://helloplayground.com/products/miracle-melts-hydrating-insertConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Let's talk about the thing no one wants to touch: DDLG, innocence play, and why "daddy" has become the internet's new favorite word. In today’s episode, I sit down with Rena Martine, author and former sex crimes prosecutor turned women's intimacy coach, for one of the most honest conversations about taboo fantasies, shame, and reclaiming pleasure without apology. We dig into why powerful women crave submission, what innocence play actually means (spoiler: it's not what you think), how survivors sometimes use kink for healing, and why society will sell you slutty Halloween costumes but shame you for the desires behind them.This episode is permission-giving, unflinching, and absolutely necessary. If you've ever felt shame for wanting something "wrong," this conversation is your permission slip to want what you want.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Rena's Journey from Prosecutor to Intimacy Coach15:15 Understanding DDLG and Age Play28:37 Exploring Society's Double Standards29:38 Privilege and Normalizing Taboo Discussions31:09 Non-Monogamy and Societal Judgments32:16 Polyamory and Public Perception37:25 Kink Acceptance and Media Representation42:54 Navigating DDLG Dynamics47:48 Empowerment Through KinkConnect with Rena Martinehttps://www.renamartine.com/bookhttps://www.instagram.com/_rena.martine_/Join the Couples Retreat! https://www.amandadames.com/couples-retreatOrder Playground Miracle Melts here! https://helloplayground.com/products/miracle-melts-hydrating-insertConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

You heard it here first: sex gets better as you age. Don’t believe me? Listen to this episode.I sit down with Susan Bratton, intimacy expert and sex educator, for a refreshing conversation about pleasure, confidence, and why desire does not have an expiration date. We talk about how so many people are taught to expect sex to fade over time, and why that belief is doing way more damage than aging ever could. Susan shares what actually helps couples stay curious, connected, and turned on long term, especially when shame and routine start creeping in. We also get into kink, power dynamics, and sexual longevity. Susan explains how confidence, embodiment, and caring for your body play a huge role in pleasure as you get older, and why performance-focused sex often gets in the way of real intimacy.This episode is permission-filled, honest, and surprisingly hopeful. If you want proof that your best sex might still be ahead of you, this conversation will absolutely change your mind.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Maintaining Sexual Health and Stamina25:53 Embracing Confidence and Sexuality27:43 Maintaining Sexual Health with Age29:43 The Role of Nitric Oxide30:48 The Benefits of Pumping32:20 Advanced Treatments for Sexual Health34:26 Red Light Therapy and LubricantsConnect with Susan Brattonhttps://betterlover.comhttps://getflowfree.comhttps://getglowbelow.comhttps://pumpingguide.comJoin the Couples Retreat! https://www.amandadames.com/couples-retreatGet your BDSM Checklist here: https://www.amandadames.com/bdsmlistConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Being obsessed with someone can be so embarrassing. Frankly, you barely even know this person but somehow your brain has decided that this person is now the main character of your life. Been there, done that. In this episode, I sit down with my coach, Kirsten Aut to talk about obsession in a way that feels honest, relatable, and way less shameful. We unpack why obsession happens, why trying to “just stop thinking about it” never works, and how desire, fantasy, and attachment get all tangled together when someone lights up your nervous system just enough to throw you off balance.If you have ever thought, “Why am I like this?” or caught yourself spiraling over someone you barely dated, this episode will make you feel seen, understood, and a lot less alone.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Understanding Obsession and Attachment12:01 Realizations and Reflections on Obsession27:20 Growth Mindset in Relationships29:37 Navigating Modern Dating35:01 Trusting Your Intuition38:51 Manifestation and Personal GrowthConnect with Kristen Authttps://www.newbadassyou.com/https://www.instagram.com/thekristenaut/https://www.tiktok.com/@thekristenautJoin the Couples Retreat! https://www.amandadames.com/couples-retreatGet your BDSM Checklist here: https://www.amandadames.com/bdsmlistConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Who says you need a dungeon or hours of planning for a night you’ll never forget? In this episode we're sharing 5 simple and powerful BDSM scene ideas you can use tonight—no fancy gear or prep required. From voice-only command scenes and sensory deprivation with household items, to secret service rituals, playful punishment games, and emotional restraint with praise, you’ll find inspiration for any dynamic. Plus, don’t miss the 5-minute scene challenge! Ready to make your night unforgettable? Check out our “Scene Creation Mastery” (only $9!) at https://domsubliving.com/scene-creation-mastery/Connect with Alessandra https://domsubliving.com/https://www.instagram.com/domsubliving/https://www.tiktok.com/@domsublivinghttps://www.facebook.com/domsublivinghttps://www.youtube.com/@DomSubLiving?sub_confirmation=1Check Out My Friday Vibe Series: https://thekinkconsultant.substack.com/Get your FREE BDSM Checklist HEREhttps://www.amandadames.com/bdsmlistConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Talking about sex should not be this hard, and yet for so many people, it still is.In this episode, I sit down with Dr. Tara, tenured professor of relational sexual communication, host of the Luvbites podcast, and author of How Do You Like It?, to talk about what actually makes a sex life and a relationship work. We cover everything from why emotional safety is the real prerequisite for good communication, to how shame shows up in our relationships long before we ever talk about kink.Dr. Tara shares what she teaches her university students about sexual communication across the lifespan, from sexual debut to long-term partnership, aging, and everything in between. We talk about why most people were never taught how to talk about sex, money, or desire, and how that lack of language quietly impacts intimacy.If you have ever struggled to ask for what you want, felt disconnected from a partner, or wished there was a guidebook for navigating intimacy, this episode will give you clarity, language, and a lot to reflect on.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Sexual Communication and Education08:43 Emotional Safety in Relationships17:50 Personal Divorce Stories and Lessons Learned18:42 Communicating About Money and Sex in Relationships22:30 Essential Communication in Relationships25:22 Understanding Sexual Preferences and PolyamoryGrab a copy of her book: How Do You Like It?: A Guide for Getting What You Want (in Bed) https://amzn.to/4iWt60aConnect with Dr. Tara https://www.luvbites.co/https://www.instagram.com/luvbites.co/https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCrbW6PCKjgcxkq3dTvjjeyQhttps://open.spotify.com/show/2SZ60RxLOyQ900l4PgJAlTJoin the Couples Retreat! https://www.amandadames.com/couples-retreatGet your BDSM Checklist here: https://www.amandadames.com/bdsmlistConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

One thing about kinky dating: it should not be this hard to find your people. Thankfully, BeeDee App exists and yes, I brought Pieter back on the podcast because a lot has happened since the first time he was here.In this episode, Pieter and I get into compatibility percentages, brat detection failures, monogamy filters, and why BeeDee is miles better than scrolling through FetLife hoping someone in your city is actually compatible. We also talk about BeeDee’s new features like incognito mode and travel mode, and the wild stats behind how many messages, matches, and relationships are happening because of this app. If you’ve ever wished kinky dating felt easier, more intentional, and way less chaotic, this episode is your permission slip to finally download the app, take the test, and meet people who actually match you inside and outside the bedroom.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Personal Experiences with BeeDee App13:24 The Origin Story of BeeDee App20:29 New Features and Updates on BeeDee App29:47 Upcoming Features on BeeDee AppDownload the BeeDee App https://web.beedee.app/Check Out My Friday Vibe Series: https://thekinkconsultant.substack.com/Sign-Up For the TCK Couples Retreat: https://www.amandadames.com/BetaWaitlistConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

"The number one thing about being a Dom is you need to have the best interest of the other person in mind.You cannot take advantage of the other person because of their submissive role."In this episode, we're continuing the conversation about finding Doms, and what actually makes a good one. Spoiler: it's not about being the strictest or the loudest, it's about showing up consistently, knowing when to admit you're wrong, and understanding that feelings can (and will) change how you play. We dive into what he's actually looking for in a submissive, how he deals with performance anxiety without spiraling, and why sometimes the best thing a Dom can do is pause the whole D/S dynamic.If you've been wondering what separates a good Dom from someone who just talks a big game, or you're trying to level up your own leadership without losing your mind, you'll definitely enjoy this episode.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Understanding the Dom-Sub Dynamic06:28 Educating Your Dom11:09 Consistency in Dom-Sub Relationships20:59 Support and Consistency in D/s Dynamics27:29 Spotting Submissive Tendencies38:42 Exploring New Dynamics TogetherSign-up for the Couples Retreat! For couples and curious duos ready to explore kink, deepen trust, and turn communication into connection. ⁠https://www.amandadames.com/BetaWaitlist⁠Let’s take kink to the high seas! Join me at the Kinky Cruise at ⁠https://www.kinkycruise.com⁠ and use code TKC50 FOR $50 off per person.Check Out My Friday Vibe Series: ⁠https://thekinkconsultant.substack.com/⁠Connect with Me: ⁠⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠⁠

One of the questions I get constantly is, “Where can I find a Dom?”So in this episode, I sit down with my Dom to talk honestly about where real Doms come from, how he found the kink community, and what he actually looks for when choosing a submissive.In this episode, he shares how he found the kink community, what shaped the way he leads, and how our dynamic started long before either of us named it. We talk about emotional steadiness, consistency, red flags, green flags, and the difference between a man performing dominance and someone who can genuinely hold you. If you’ve ever wondered where to meet a Dom, how to choose one, or what a grounded power exchange feels like from the inside, this conversation gives you a clear, real-world look behind the scenes.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Discovering FetLife and Online Communities05:33 Learning and Growing as a Dom24:11 How We Actualy Me25:48 Advice for Subs and Doms in the Dating World33:59 The Importance of Communication and Flexibility36:16 Handling Emotional Regulation and Vulnerability40:06 Respecting Boundaries and InsecuritiesHow to Tell Your Partner Your Kink Join this 1-hr workshop and learn how to talk to your partner about your kink without shame, panic, or awkward silence https://www.amandadames.com/offers/GvipoKWe/checkoutLet’s take kink to the high seas! Join me at the Kinky Cruise at https://www.kinkycruise.com and use code TKC50 FOR $50 off per person.Check Out My Friday Vibe Series: https://thekinkconsultant.substack.com/Connect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠

Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers with Kathy Kay In this episode, I talk with Kathy Kay, host of the Strictly Anonymous podcast and author of Strictly Anonymous Confessions: Secret Sex Lives of Total Strangers. We get into how her hit podcast began with Craigslist ads, how she’s collected over 1,200 real-life sex stories, and what she’s learned about desire, shame, and human nature along the way.Kathy Kay and I dive into the wildest stories from her new book; from 50 gangbangs to secret throuples, and women discovering their sexuality later in life. We talk about how these confessions reveal the truth about what people really want, how she keeps it all anonymous, and why storytelling is the key to normalizing desire without shame.If you’ve ever been curious about the fantasies people keep hidden or just love hearing real stories that prove no one is as “normal” as they seem, this episode is going to be your new guilty pleasure.Pre-order The Book: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCdEpisode Highlights: (00:00) How Strictly Anonymous Confessions Was Born(09:00) The Stories Behind the Book(18:00) Shame, Desire, and Owning Your Pleasure(23:00) Normalizing Nontraditional Relationships(35:00) Why People Crave Anonymity and ConfessionPre-order The Book: https://amzn.to/4i7hBCd⁠Listen to the Podcast: https://www.strictlyanonymouspodcast.com/Connect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Check Out My Friday Vibe Series: https://thekinkconsultant.substack.com/Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

What happens when your ADHD brain meets your kink identity? Turns out, they have a lot more in common than you might think.In this episode, I sit down with Cate Osborne, also known as Catieosaurus, sex educator, content creator, and author of The ADHD Field Guide for Adults, to talk about how neurodivergence shapes intimacy, communication, and play. Cate shares her story of being diagnosed with ADHD at 30 and how that discovery changed everything: from her relationships to her career to the way she experiences pleasure.We dive into rejection sensitivity, safe words, aftercare, and why kink can be such a powerful framework for neurodivergent people to feel seen, understood, and safe. Cate also shares insights from her new book, a practical (and very funny) guide to adulting with ADHD, and why she believes self-compassion is one of the most underrated forms of aftercare.If you’ve ever felt “too much,” struggled to ask for what you need, or wanted to understand how kink and neurodivergence overlap, this episode will make you feel a little less alone and a lot more understood.Episode Highlights: 00:00 ADHD and Kink: The Overlap12:21 Rejection Sensitivity and Kink19:23 The Power of Self-Advocacy21:03 Kink and Neurodivergence24:41 Personal Kink Journeys28:54 Normalizing Kink and CommunicationPre-Order her book here: ​​https://catieosaurus.com/the-adhd-field-guideConnect with Cate: https://www.instagram.com/catieosaurus/https://catieosaurus.comConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Let’s take kink to the high seas! Join me at the Kinky Cruise at https://www.kinkycruise.com and use code TKC50 FOR $50 off per person.Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

What really happens after betrayal, and how do you start to heal when trust has been broken?In this episode, I sit down with Lauren LaRusso, therapist and infidelity specialist, to talk about the messy, painful, and deeply human side of cheating. We explore why infidelity happens, the emotional chaos it brings, and how both partners, the betrayed and the betrayer, can find their way back to honesty and self-understanding.Lauren and I also unpack the connection between kink and infidelity, how fear of rejection, shame, or unmet desires can lead someone to explore outside their relationship. We talk about the importance of vulnerability, honest communication, and the courage it takes to express who you really are before crisis hits.If you’ve ever been cheated on, cheated yourself, or just want to understand what drives betrayal, this episode is a raw, compassionate, deep dive into the psychology of desire, avoidance, and emotional repair.Episode Highlights: 00:00 Defining Cheating and Its Complexities07:28 The Role of Kink in Infidelity19:32 Living Authentically in Relationships22:13 Practicing Honesty in Relationships24:28 Facing the Fear of Abandonment32:11 Resources for Healing and SupportConnect with Lauren: https://www.laurenlarusso.com/contacthttps://www.instagram.com/laurenlarussoConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

Episode 56 - For Beau Delacroix, kink isn’t just play. It’s art, storytelling, and self-expression.In this episode, I go behind the scenes with Beau to talk about how creativity and control come together in his work as a Dom, content creator, and artist. From filming erotic stories to crafting toys by hand, Beau shares how intention, aesthetics, and vulnerability shape every scene he creates.We talk about the balance between dominance and empathy, how to lead with emotional intelligence, and what it means to create art that feels both erotic and human. Beau also opens up about masculinity, shame, and why letting go of perfection is often the most liberating part of creation both in kink and in life.If you’ve ever been curious about the artistry behind BDSM or how creators like Beau turn fantasy into something real, this episode is your invitation to step behind the curtain.Episode Highlights00:00 Journey into Content Creation20:46 Living Openly and Embracing Kink22:59 Navigating Kink Dynamics in Relationships27:07 Teaching Kink to Long-Term Partners30:44 Crafting and Sharing Kink Implements33:34 Balancing Control in Kink and Personal Life40:08 Finding Kinky Partners in the Modern Dating WorldConnect with Beau:https://www.instagram.com/beau_delacroix/https://www.tiktok.com/@beau_delacroixhttps://onlyfans.com/artoforgasmConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

Ready to turn people on and change their lives? Get certified with Somatica at somaticainstitute.com and use code TKC25 for $750 off your enrollment.Episode 56 - In this episode, I sit down with my friend Aubrey Aust, a relational psychology and philosophy researcher from NYU, to unpack the psychology behind BDSM, fantasy, and desire. We talk about how kink can become a space for healing, a “relational laboratory” for exploring trust, safety, and selfhood.Aubrey and I go deep on Freud, daddy issues, jealousy, and why honesty about desire is non-negotiable. We explore how shame can block intimacy, what embodiment really feels like, and how the dynamics of dominance and submission mirror our earliest emotional patterns. Whether you’re a dom, sub, switch, or just curious about the psychology behind play, this conversation will have you thinking about kink in a whole new way.Episode Highlights: (00:00) Exploring Fantasy and Desire Through BDSM(02:45) Revisiting Freud and Modern Sexual Psychology(10:45) The Power of Honesty in Desire and Connection(15:00) Working With Kinky and Non-Kinky Partners(21:00) Embodiment, Boundaries, and Somatic Awareness(29:00) Can Kink Be Therapeutic?(34:00) Relational Energy and Co-Regulation Check out Lube Life's ultra slick, thick silicone lube!Connect with Aubrey Austhttps://www.instagram.com/aubrey__austConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

Ready to turn people on and change their lives? Get certified with Somatica at somaticainstitute.com and use code TKC25 for $750 off your enrollment.Episode 55 - Let’s talk about back door play, the kind of pleasure that deserves way more hype (and way less shame).In this episode, I sit down with Annette Benedetti, host of Talk Sex with Annette and certified sex and intimacy coach, to unpack everything you’ve ever wanted to know about exploring the back door. We get into how to prepare, what to expect, and how to make it fun, safe, and insanely pleasurable for everyone involved.Annette shares her real-life guide; from her favorite toys and plugs to lube tips, comfort positions, and how to talk about it without awkwardness. We also discuss why communication and consent are the ultimate turn-ons, how to handle nerves (and mess), and why curiosity should always come before shame.If you’ve ever been curious about trying backdoor play but weren’t sure where to start, this episode gives you all the confidence, info, and laughter you need to make it your new favorite adventure.Episode Highlights(00:00) The Myth of Virginity and the Power of Experience(12:00) Exploring the Backdoor: Tips, Prep, and Cleanliness(18:00) Backdoor Toys, Training Kits, and Plug Preferences(29:00) Safety Tips, Hygiene, and Aftercare(32:00) Understanding Partners, Boundaries, and Communication(38:00) Breaking Shame and Making Pleasure NormalConnect with Annette: https://www.instagram.com/annettebenedetti/www.youtube.com/@talksexwithannettetalksexwithannette.com/shop-with-annetteConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

Ready to turn people on and change their lives? Get certified with Somatica at somaticainstitute.com and use code TKC25 for $750 off your enrollment.Episode 54 - In this episode, I sit down with Lee, founder of ConCations, the company behind Kinky Cruise and Kinky Caribbean, to talk about what really happens when the kink world hits the high seas. We get into how these cruises came to life, what makes them so different from your typical hotel takeovers, and why so many people leave feeling more connected than ever to themselves, their partners, and the community.Lee also opens up about his own 24/7 power exchange dynamic, what it’s like juggling kink, family, and polyamory, and why these events are about so much more than sex. They’re about finding your people, building real intimacy, and creating spaces where everyone belongs.If you’ve ever wanted to explore lifestyle travel or just love the idea of a vacation where consent, connection, and play come first, this episode will have you ready to pack your cuffs (and maybe your sunscreen).Episode Highlights(00:00) From Weekend Cons to Weeklong Connections(10:00) Bridging Swingers and Kinksters with Swinkation(20:00) High Protocol vs. Everyday Power Exchange(33:00) Beach Parties, Dungeons, and Sex-Positive Play(39:00) Connecting Before the Cruise Starts(41:00) Why This Is Perfect for BeginnersJoin the next Kinky Cruise! Head to https://www.ConCations.com and use the code TKC50 for fifty dollars off your booking!Connect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1

Ready to turn people on and change their lives? Get certified with Somatica at somaticainstitute.com and use code TKC25 for $750 off your enrollment.Episode 53 - In this episode, I sit down with Shelby Devlin, Somatica-certified sex and relationship coach, BDSM educator, and author of The Pleasure Protocol, to talk about her journey from working at a San Francisco fetish boutique to becoming one of the most respected BDSM coaches in the field. We talk about Barbie bondage beginnings, the psychology of power, and why shame-free exploration is the gateway to pleasure that actually lasts.If you’ve ever wanted to understand how BDSM can become a path toward self-awareness, healing, and deeper connection, this conversation is for you.Episode Highlights: (00:00) Barbie Bondage and Early Curiosity(12:00) How Somatica Training Changed Everything(18:00) Combining Somatic Touch and BDSM Coaching(23:00) Healing Shame and Building Safety Through Play(38:00) Communication, Consent, and Aftercare 101Connect with Shelbyhttps://www.shelbydevlin.com/bioConnect with Me: ⁠https://www.tiktok.com/@thekinkconsultant⁠⁠https://www.instagram.com/the_kinkconsultant/⁠Speak Your Desires with Confidence - Download this FREE step-by-step guide to having open, honest, and judgment-free conversations about kink, boundaries, and pleasure.https://www.amandadames.com/Speak-Your-Desires-with-Confidence-opt-in-1