How Not To Suck At Divorce

What should you do when you’re overwhelmed during divorce and everything else in your life is falling apart, too? Tell your attorney you’re having a difficult week and ask what genuinely needs your attention, write down what you can and cannot control, and simplify your responsibilities where possible. Before postponing legal decisions, confirm any emergencies or deadlines with your lawyer.The car needs repairs. Work is demanding. Your kid is sick. And right on cue, another email from your divorce attorney arrives.In this episode of How Not to Suck at Divorce, family-law attorney Morgan L. Stogsdill and Andrea Rappaport share three practical steps for managing divorce stress when you’re already stretched too thin. They explain how to communicate with your lawyer, organize competing concerns, and give yourself a break without disappearing from your case.Along the way: takeout guilt, Morgan’s groceries arriving at her office on a Sunday, and Andrea explaining why a true-crime podcast sometimes feels more manageable than forced positivity. Some days, survival means abandoning the chicken parmesan.Get Support for Your Next StepsYou don’t have to figure out the divorce process alone. Our Divorce Crash Course helps you get organized, prepare better questions, and understand common mistakes before they become expensive.Explore the course, Divorce Pep Talks, practical guides, and our free community at How Not to Suck at Divorce.What You’ll Learn✅ How to tell your divorce attorney you’re overwhelmed with a concise update rather than a long explanation or unanswered emails.✅ What to clarify before postponing major divorce decisions, including genuine deadlines, emergencies, and what can reasonably wait.✅ How to organize divorce stress into two columns: what you can control and what you cannot.✅ How to identify manageable actions without expecting yourself to solve every problem at once.✅ Why taking a break can mean lowering everyday expectations, asking for help, or choosing an enjoyable distraction.Episode Highlights(00:00) When a week from hell collides with your divorce(00:35) Andrea and Morgan’s own terrible-week inspiration(01:51) The urge to solve everything when you’re already overwhelmed(03:39) Tell your attorney you’re having a difficult week(04:36) Why rushing a decision can create more work and expense(06:05) Get competing concerns out of your head and onto paper(07:42) Separate what you can control from what you cannot(09:44) Give yourself permission to operate in survival mode(11:40) Takeout, dinner expectations, and abandoning the chicken parmesan(12:48) Morgan’s grocery delivery goes to the wrong place(13:45) Taking a mental break with entertainment(17:25) Your three-step recap for an overwhelming week(18:02) Finding support through the hardest daysKey Takeaways🔷 Communicate before going quiet. Let your attorney know you’re struggling and ask which tasks or decisions need attention now.🔷 Confirm what can wait. A difficult week doesn’t erase legal deadlines. Work with your lawyer to identify where you have breathing room.🔷 Write down the whole picture. List the concerns taking up your attention, then separate available actions from circumstances you cannot change.🔷 Lower the unnecessary demands. An easy dinner or a quieter evening may be enough when your capacity is limited.🔷 Choose a break that works for you. A walk, a show, or an entertaining podcast can give you something else to focus on. You don’t have to force yourself to feel cheerful.Resources and SponsorsDivorce Crash CourseOur private podcast and guidebook help you prepare for divorce and make more informed decisions. Typically priced at $150, available now for $50, thanks to our angel underwriters OurFamilyWizard and Soberlink.Explore the Divorce Crash CourseDivorce Pep TalksFormerly our Guided Divorce Meditations, these private audio recordings put Andrea in your ear when you need reassurance, humor, and help taking your next step.Explore Divorce Pep Talks and other resourcesFree Pre-Divorce ChecklistOrganize your concerns, review your financial picture, and prepare questions for an attorney—even if you haven’t decided to file.Get the free checklist through our websiteFree Private CommunityConnect with other people navigating divorce and co-parenting.Join our private Facebook communityOurFamilyWizardExplore tools for organizing co-parenting communication, schedules, and shared expenses. Visit our listener page for offer details.Explore OurFamilyWizardIf this conversation helped, follow How Not to Suck at Divorce and share it with someone having a week from hell.You’ve got this. And we’ve got you.This podcast provides general information, not individualized legal or mental health advice. Consult your own professionals about your circumstances.

What can you say when friends and family keep asking about your divorce—and you don’t want to talk about it? Tell them you’d rather discuss something else, then redirect the conversation. Try: “The divorce is still happening, and I will pay you to talk about anything else.” You can appreciate someone’s concern without giving them a personal update.In this mini episode of How Not to Suck at Divorce, Andrea Rappaport explains why you deserve a break from discussing your divorce, how to handle unsolicited opinions, and what to say when someone asks a personal question at the worst possible moment—including right in front of your children.From the sad head tilt to the school-parking-lot conversation you immediately regret, Andrea shares practical ways to set conversational boundaries without feeling like you’re being rude.Getting support matters. So does having room to talk about something besides your ex. Pumpkin candles, questionable eyebrows, your next binge-watch—anything that reminds you there’s more to your life than this process.Get Support for Your Next StepsYou don’t have to figure out divorce alone. Our Divorce Crash Course helps you get organized, prepare better questions, and understand common mistakes before they become expensive.Explore the course, Divorce Pep Talks, practical guides, and our free checklist at How Not to Suck at Divorce.What You’ll Learn✅ Why you need breaks from talking about divorce, even when the process is still consuming your time and attention.✅ How unsolicited divorce advice can create confusion, especially when friends and family offer conflicting opinions about your case.✅ What to say when someone asks, “How’s the divorce?” without sharing details you’d rather keep private.✅ How to redirect conversations around your children and avoid discussing adult conflict within earshot.✅ How to seek support while maintaining boundaries, so your divorce doesn’t become the subject of every interaction.Episode Highlights(00:00) What to do when everyone keeps asking about your divorce(00:05) The divorce update you don’t owe anyone—and why you need a breakAndrea also covers three reasons to limit constant divorce conversations, ready-to-use responses, protecting your privacy around your children, and the new Divorce Pep Talks.Key Takeaways🔷 Have a response ready. “I don’t feel like digging into it today. What’s happening with you?” is enough.🔷 Ask for the support you actually want. Suggest a funny distraction, dinner, or getting together when you don’t have the kids.🔷 Be selective about whose guidance you invite. Friends can offer emotional support; case-specific legal questions belong with qualified counsel.🔷 Give the rest of your life some airtime. Make space for interests, friendships, curiosity, and conversations that don’t involve your ex.🔷 Keep your support system. Setting boundaries doesn’t mean bottling everything up. Choose trusted people and appropriate times to discuss what you’re going through.Resources and SponsorsDivorce Crash CourseOur private podcast and guidebook help you prepare for divorce and make more informed decisions. Typically priced at $150, available now for $50, thanks to our angel underwriters OurFamilyWizard and Soberlink.Explore the Divorce Crash CourseDivorce Pep TalksFormerly our Guided Divorce Meditations, these private audio recordings put Andrea in your ear when you need reassurance, humor, and help taking the next step.Find Divorce Pep Talks and other resourcesFree Pre-Divorce ChecklistOrganize your concerns, review your financial picture, and prepare questions for an attorney—even if you haven’t decided to file.Get the free checklist through our websiteFree Private CommunityConnect with other people navigating divorce and co-parenting.Join our private Facebook communityOurFamilyWizardExplore tools for organizing co-parenting communication, schedules, and shared expenses. Visit our listener page for offer details.Explore OurFamilyWizardFollow How Not to Suck at Divorce for mini episodes on Wednesdays and full episodes on Fridays. Share this episode with someone who needs permission to change the subject.You’ve got this. And we’ve got you.This podcast provides general information, not individualized legal or mental health advice.

What can you do when you’re so angry at your ex that you want to scream, send a brutal text, or completely lose your shit?Give yourself some space before responding. Put your phone down, notice what you’re feeling, and take a few minutes to settle before deciding what actually needs your attention. You can be furious without acting on that anger—and this guided divorce meditation gives you somewhere to start.In this mini episode of How Not to Suck at Divorce, Andrea Rappaport walks you through a funny, profanity-filled pause for those moments when your ex has pushed every available button. Think inflammatory co-parenting texts, endless emails about pickup times, and requests for flexibility from someone who refuses to give you any.There’s no pressure to forgive your ex, thank the universe, or pretend you’re fine. The goal is to feel a little calmer, give yourself room to think, and avoid a reaction you may regret.This guided meditation helps you practice:Taking a break from upsetting texts, emails, and arguments.Grounding yourself by noticing your surroundings and physical sensations.Recognizing tension in your hands, shoulders, and body.Naming the anger, hurt, fear, frustration, or exhaustion you’re feeling.Identifying the concern underneath your reaction, including parenting, money, or feeling disrespected.Considering whether a message needs a response and whether anything is genuinely urgent.Choosing your next step before reentering a difficult conversation.Whether you’re navigating a high-conflict divorce, dealing with co-parenting stress, or having a Target parking lot meltdown, save this episode for the next time you need a pause.Listen somewhere you can safely take a break. If you’re driving, keep your attention on the road and wait until you’re safely parked before closing your eyes or following the exercises.Divorce Resources & SupportGuided Divorce MeditationsWant more support for the difficult moments? Explore our guided meditation library, delivered through a private podcast feed so you can listen in your preferred podcast app.Explore the guided meditationsDivorce Crash CourseOur private podcast and guidebook help you understand the divorce process, prepare questions, and make more informed decisions. Typically priced at $150, available now for $50, thanks to our angel underwriters OurFamilyWizard and Soberlink.Get the Divorce Crash CourseFree Pre-Divorce ChecklistOrganize your thoughts, review your financial picture, and prepare questions for an attorney—even if you haven’t decided to file.Get the free checklist through our websiteFree Private Facebook CommunityConnect with other people navigating divorce and co-parenting. You don’t have to figure everything out alone.Join our private communityOurFamilyWizard: 20% Off Your First YearExplore tools for organizing co-parenting communication, schedules, and shared expenses.Learn more about OurFamilyWizardFollow How Not to Suck at Divorce so the next episode is waiting for you. Share this meditation with someone who needs a breather, and leave a rating and review if the show has helped you.You’ve got this. And we’ve got you.This meditation offers general support and does not replace individualized mental health care or legal advice.

Get informed before your next divorce decision. Our Divorce Crash Course combines a private podcast and guidebook to help you understand the process, prepare, and avoid expensive mistakes. Typically priced at $150, available now for $50, thanks to our angel underwriters OurFamilyWizard and Soberlink.Get the Divorce Crash CourseYou know what you’re angry about. But do you know what you actually want from your divorce—and what it could cost to get it?In this mini episode of How Not to Suck at Divorce, family-law attorney Morgan L. Stogsdill shares three practical divorce tips inspired by issues she’s seeing in her cases. With Andrea Rappaport mostly sidelined by illness—but still finding a way to unmute—Morgan explains how to set useful divorce goals, prepare for financial discovery, and evaluate a proposed divorce settlement without letting frustration drive every decision.From demanding the house when your real priority is keeping your children in their school district to spending $30,000 in legal fees fighting over a $10,000 difference, this episode helps you think through what you’re pursuing, why it matters, and whether the fight serves your goals.In this episode, you’ll learn:How to distinguish your underlying divorce goals from a particular demand.Why ranking your priorities can help you evaluate compromises during settlement negotiations.How clear goals help your divorce attorney focus their time.What to review in bank statements, tax returns, credit card statements, and business records before providing them through discovery.Why unexpected financial details deserve a conversation with your attorney—and why full disclosure still matters.How financial disclosures can have consequences you should discuss before documents are exchanged.What to ask your attorney about whether your proposed settlement is realistic.Why honest pushback from your lawyer doesn’t automatically mean they aren’t advocating for you.How to weigh potential legal fees against what you might gain by continuing a dispute.Your three action stepsWrite down and rank your goals. Identify what matters most, then revisit that list when new issues or strong emotions arise.Read your financial documents. Flag surprises and questions for your attorney so you can prepare while meeting your disclosure obligations.Bring your settlement ideas—and listen to the feedback. Ask what’s realistic, why, and what pursuing each issue could cost.Free pre-divorce checklistThinking about divorce or trying to organize your next steps? Our free printable checklist helps you review your financial picture, organize your concerns, and prepare questions for an attorney.Get the free pre-divorce checklist through our websiteMore resources and supportJoin our free private Facebook communityConnect with other people navigating divorce, ask questions, and find support on the difficult days.Guided Divorce MeditationsTake a moment to breathe and regroup when divorce stress and anxiety feel overwhelming.How to Hire an Attorney GuidePrepare for consultations and make a more informed choice about your legal representation.OurFamilyWizard: Get 20% off your first yearExplore tools for organizing co-parenting communication, schedules, and shared expenses.Explore our podcast playlistsFind more episodes organized around the divorce questions you need answered.Follow How Not to Suck at Divorce so you don’t miss the next episode. If this conversation helped you, leave a rating and review and share it with someone who needs it.Divorce is a marathon, not a sprint. You’ve got this. And we’ve got you.This episode provides general information and does not replace legal advice about your individual circumstances.Mentioned in this episode:Our Family WizardHow Not to Suck at Divorce is proud to be the only podcast that can offer you 20% off your first year of the essentials package. Visit Our Family Wizard to ask your attorney is OFW is right for your family. Our Family Wizard

Get informed before you make your next divorce decision. Our Divorce Crash Course combines a private podcast and guidebook to help you understand the process and prepare. Typically priced at $150, available now for $50, thanks to our angel underwriters OurFamilyWizard and Soberlink.Get the Divorce Crash CourseYou’ve thought about divorce. Maybe you’ve Googled it, threatened it, or whispered it to your best friend. But how do you know if you’re ready for a divorce—or exhausted and desperate for something to change?In this episode of How Not to Suck at Divorce, family-law attorney Morgan L. Stogsdill and comedian and divorced mom Andrea Rappaport break down what to do before filing for divorce. From recognizing patterns in your marriage to understanding your finances and getting answers about child custody, this conversation gives you practical steps to take while you’re still deciding.There’s no quiz, magic number, or checklist that can decide whether you should end your marriage. But you can get clearer about what’s happening, gather information, and build a support team before making your next move.In this episode, we discuss:Wanting to leave your marriage versus wanting your marriage to change.Writing down recurring problems—and positive moments—to see the bigger picture.How a therapist can support you through the decision-making process.What to understand about income, debt, household expenses, and housing before divorce.Why fear about custody and parenting time can lead to decisions you later regret.Morgan’s “Chad and Brenda” example: why hiding the children’s passports is a moment to pause and call your attorney.Why a divorce attorney consultation doesn’t commit you to filing.Comparing attorneys before paying a retainer.Turning to professionals for guidance and friends and family for support.Get your free pre-divorce checklistNeed somewhere to start? Our printable checklist helps you organize your thoughts, review your financial picture, and prepare questions for an attorney—even if you haven’t decided to leave.Get the free checklist on our websiteResources and supportHow to Hire an Attorney GuidePrepare for consultations and make a more informed decision about who represents you.Guided Divorce MeditationsGive yourself a moment to breathe when divorce anxiety and overwhelm take over.Join our free private Facebook communityConnect with other people navigating separation, divorce, and co-parenting.Explore our podcast playlistsFind episodes organized around the divorce questions you need answered.OurFamilyWizard: Get 20% offExplore tools for organizing co-parenting communication, schedules, and shared expenses.If this episode helped you, share it with someone who’s quietly asking the same questions—and leave us a rating and review so more people can find the show.Divorce is a marathon, not a sprint. You’ve got this. And we’ve got you.This episode provides general information and does not replace advice from an attorney about your circumstances.Mentioned in this episode:Our Family WizardHow Not to Suck at Divorce is proud to be the only podcast that can offer you 20% off your first year of the essentials package. Visit Our Family Wizard to ask your attorney is OFW is right for your family. Our Family Wizard