The SmartSex Podcast

"Why do I have a sex drive difference from my partner and what can I do about it? " "Why does my wife never seem to initiate sex?" "What can I do about my anger and frustration around being sexually rejected?" "How come I can't always tell if my wife has had an orgasm, and what can I do?" If you've asked one of these questions, you're not alone! Men are curious and want to have deep, intimate relationships, but sometimes can't find the answers. Doug interviews Leslie in this episode to get to the bottom of some of these questions. There's more!!! Many other topics and questions arose during the talk including: - The difference between men's and women's sexual fantasies and sexual desire. - What is underneath men's sexual frustration and the personal and relational "fix" for it?  - The role of fear of not getting sexual needs met and men's sex "drive". - "Does pornography work as an antidote to a difference in sexual desire?" - How couples can work through and negotiate their sexual life in all its nuances.  - Why men's pursuit of their partners often fails. - The truth about "sexual incompatibility" and what to do. The episode takes an unexpected turn in the latter part of the episode when Doug asks about why affairs happen and if men (and women) can get the passion back after the affair.  This is a lively discussion that will help the listener become Better, Smarter & Sexier! Thank you for listening. Your SUBSCRIBING, sharing and continued listening helps keep this podcast alive all over the world. For products and programs to grow, enhance and transform your life, relationships and intimacy visit  www.leslieGustafson.com/shop Leslie Gustafson can be found on Instagram @LeslieGustafson1

It's Doug's turn to put Leslie in the hot seat and interviews Leslie.  Doug asks the daring questions that YOU want to know the answers to: Does size really matter? Do clients take their clothes off in sex therapy? What exactly is a sex therapist and what do you do? Who comes to sex therapy and why? What is great sex anyway? How are men and women different when it comes to sex? Or are they? How does one become a sex therapist? Are some people just not sexual at all? He also presents numerous real life couple examples for Leslie to "solve". Leslie answers these questions with the real truth using her experience as a Master Sex, Love and Relationship Coach, licensed Individual and couples therapist and AASECT Sex Therapist.  This is a lively discussion that will help the listener become Better, Smarter & Sexier! Thank you for listening. Your SUBSCRIBING, sharing and continued listening helps keep this podcast alive all over the world. For products and programs to grow, enhance and transform your life, relationships and intimacy visit  www.leslieGustafson.com/shop Leslie Gustafson can be found on Instagram @LeslieGustafson1

Leslie has the joy of interviewing Doug in the second episode of Men and Sex. The conversation is deep and rich. We uncover what healthy sexuality is for men and what is underneath men's desires. "Most men want to be better men" but don't necessarily know the path in the intimate, sexual, interpersonal and relational arenas. Men are lovers and leaders but need to unearth and explore identity, emotions, the heart of a man, the role of porn and becoming whole as a man. Doug emphasizes the critical importance of men understanding their own complexity so they can live fully, powerfully and confidently in and out of the bedroom. Many men lean on sex as their primary avenue for the management of their emotions, releasing stress and feeling alive and connected, but must reconcile what sex is about for them, what it really can be and who they are as men. Lastly, the "GREAT WANT" for men (that both men and women hold) is highlighted. PLEASE Subscribe, Enjoy! And Become, Better, Smarter and Sexier! For products and programs to grow, enhance and transform your life, relationships and intimacy visit  www.leslieGustafson.com/shop Leslie Gustafson can be found on Instagram @LeslieGustafson1

Leslie and Doug discuss male sexuality in a date-like set-up over a nice glass of red wine. They have a very real and at times raw conversation about men, sex, and what it's all about and cover topics including:              male sexual development,               the importance of sex,               what is addiction,               out-of-control sexual behavior,               men's feelings and desires,               pornography and much more THIS is a must listen to podcast! Insights, stories, wisdom about men, and at times contrary opinions gained from the real-life work and experience of joining personally with men as their mentor, coach, therapist are shared. This conversation is full of information and understanding that every man and the women who love them can grow from and become "Better, Smarter & Sexier." PLEASE Subscribe, Enjoy! And Become, Better, Smarter and Sexier! For products and programs to grow, enhance and transform your life, relationships and intimacy visit  www.leslieGustafson.com/shop Leslie Gustafson can be found on Instagram @LeslieGustafson1

In this playful episode, I'm excited to have a special guest, who is also my partner, my lover, and my best friend in life, Doug Gustafson. We talk about a timely topic - "Play" in and out of the bedroom.    Play is critical to our well-being, relationships, and our marriages. Doug and I discuss play in general, play individually, and as a couple. We want to inspire you to create a playful lifestyle with your partner!   Join us as we talk about all this and more, and encourage you to become smarter, healthier, and sexier!   PLEASE Subscribe, Enjoy! And Become, Better, Smarter and Sexier! For products and programs to grow, enhance and transform your life, relationships and intimacy visit  www.leslieGustafson.com/shop Leslie Gustafson can be found on Instagram @LeslieGustafson1

My husband, Doug Gustafson, interviews me as we dip into the fascinating world of fantasy and imagination in the bedroom.   There are many nuances and layers to this topic, but I want you to know that you are a creative and imaginative person in and out of the bedroom! Let yourself ponder that.   Considering yourself and what you want to do with your inner life enhances you personally and could potentially improve your experience as a sexual person and a sexual partner.   What's fantasy all about, and what different kinds of fantasy are there? Why would we need fantasy to enhance our sexual experience? What do couples need to do to have a healthy fantasy? Are there any you shouldn't be having? What about the "moral" issue?   Join us as we talk about all this and more, and encourage you to become smarter, healthier, and sexier!   PLEASE Subscribe, Enjoy! And Become, Better, Smarter and Sexier! For products and programs to grow, enhance and transform your life, relationships and intimacy visit  www.leslieGustafson.com/shop Leslie Gustafson can be found on Instagram @LeslieGustafson1

What does it take to have a successful dating life?  Do you need confidence? Do you need game? How has dating changed since the pandemic? Where is dating headed - online, in real life, both?  I was delighted to have three incredible, knowledgeable dating coaches to talk about what single people are up against, how to navigate dating, and what the sexual culture is like today in this first part of Sex and Dating Today.  About my Guests:With over 10,000 hours of one-on-one coaching and training experience, Nate Hockstra is an expert in helping men find meaningful relationships without the use of any "pick up" or game playing. You can connect with him at Ditchthegame.com Connell Barrett is the founder of Dating Transformation and a dating coach for The League. He is the author of the book, Dating Sucks, But You Don't, a dating guide for men in the #MeToo Era. He's also an advisor for AskMen and Elite Daily, and has appeared on "Access Hollywood," and the Today Show, as well as in Playboy, Cosmopolitan, and O, The Oprah Magazine. You can read his weekly advice column, "Ask the Dating Coach," at DatingTransformation.com. Anwar White is a certified dating and relationship coach for women of color who has helped thousands of women heal their hearts, date effectively, and get their guy! You can check him out further at Get Your Guy Coaching, or book a free consultation with him at getyourguycoaching.com/apply. PLEASE Subscribe, Enjoy! And Become, Better, Smarter and Sexier! For products and programs to grow, enhance and transform your life, relationships and intimacy visit  www.leslieGustafson.com/shop Leslie Gustafson can be found on Instagram @LeslieGustafson1

Sexuality, Sensuality, Erotic… all words that women tend to shy away from. BUT… Cindy Scharkey and I are here to empower women to put aside their fear and embrace cultivating sensuality and erotic energy in one's life and relationships.   This episode hits on what's blocking women's expression of sensuality and ways to overcome it. To have the freedom to voice what they need and to seek pleasure. Put the work of YOURSELF on the forefront. Let yourself have what you long for: in yourself, in your life, in your sexuality, and in your relationships. Cindy Scharkey, RN, BSN, is passionate about breaking the silence surrounding women's sexuality. Through her workshops, speaking events, and private consultations, she equips women with both content and self-confidence to express, experience, and enjoy their sexuality. She also empowers parents with knowledge and confidence to be their child's primary sexual health educator. Cindy offers sex education and resources through her free monthly newsletter and blog at www.cindyscharkey.com.   And she just launched her new book – Permission for Pleasure: Tending Your Sexual Garden Thank you Cindy for our delightful and empowering conversation.   PLEASE Subscribe, Enjoy! And Become, Better, Smarter and Sexier! For products and programs to grow, enhance and transform your life, relationships and intimacy visit  www.leslieGustafson.com/shop Leslie Gustafson can be found on Instagram @LeslieGustafson1  

In this episode, Leslie is joined by guest, Cassie Howard. In a rich, fun conversation, they discuss the connection between sex, money, and personal growth.  Cassie is an online business mentor for women that is known for her savvy sexy sales skills and her ability to make business simple, fun, AND sustainable. Cassie shares that succeeding in her business has given her an inner confidence and a feeling of power, similar to the transformative experience of an orgasm!  The conversation moves on to careers and passion! If something isn't enjoyable, it won't get done.  Prioritizing pleasure leads to further success! Cassie and Leslie share how this was evident in both their entrepreneurial journeys.  They also discussed the impact of money on their lives, with Cassie noting that having more money allowed her to enjoy luxury experiences in and out of the bedroom.  They emphasized the need for communication and mutual desire to keep pleasure and fun alive in the bedroom and in the whole of one's life.  Thank you, Cassie, for joining the podcast!  PLEASE Subscribe, Enjoy! And Become, Better, Smarter and Sexier! For products and programs to grow, enhance and transform your life, relationships and intimacy visit  www.leslieGustafson.com/shop Leslie Gustafson can be found on Instagram @LeslieGustafson1

In this episode, Leslie continues the orgasm talk with her girlfriends Lori, Laurel, Jamie and Kristen about how women work sexually amongst laughter and even singing. How we as women and men have been oversold a masculine model of sexuality with it's performance orientation and outcome focus, and the impact that has had on everyone's understanding of sexuality. The negative effects of this on both men and women are brought to attention. We move into talking about the differences between and myths we hold about men's and women's orgasms. Central to this episode are lively thoughts, feelings and experiences around the topic of masturbation. An emphasis on the importance of knowing how our own personal sexuality works, how our bodies work and discovering what brings us pleasure is highlighted. Also, Leslie educates on the effect that self-pleasuring and knowing how one works has on pleasurable and predictable orgasms for women. As in previous episodes, much of the fun, jaw-dropping, and relatability is found in the honest sharing and humor brought by the girlfriends with their willingness to share. We are invited to hear how it really is for them in their lives and intimate relationships. Personal turn-ons that many women will relate to, creating anticipation, sexual communication, out-of-the-bedroom foreplay and sex education via the "Friends" TV show all get talked about. Lastly, Leslie educates on universal orgasm blocks and provides the big keys to having consistent, wanted sex. PLEASE Subscribe, Enjoy! And Become, Better, Smarter and Sexier! For products and programs to grow, enhance and transform your life, relationships and intimacy visit  www.leslieGustafson.com/shop Leslie Gustafson can be found on Instagram @LeslieGustafson1

In this episode, Leslie is joined by real women Jamie Miller, Laurel Avrin, Kristen Wheeler, and Lori Makkai as they all discuss the HOT topic of Orgasm for women… What orgasm is, how it happens mand what gets in the way is explored. Through moments of much laughter, this episode digs deep on the intricacies of orgasm and the personal and relational issues that surround them. The role of pressure and expectations, stress, caregiving, and over-thinking on orgasm and sexual pleasure in general is discussed. How to activate our own sexual want and keep it alive, the importance of the right atmosphere and context, plus what arousal is are all talked about both clinically and personally.  Leslie educates about how knowing our turn-ons and turn-offs can be game-changing for us. You will also hear about what partners can do and not do to help the sexual experience and enhance the likelihood of orgasm. The courageous women in this episode share their personal experiences around orgasm and their own discovery of orgasm. The Smart Sex Podcast is Real Talk About Sex, Relationships & HOT Topics.  Your listening, joining the conversation on social media and telling others keeps the podcast up and running - THANK YOU! Leslie can be found on all major social media platforms, particularly at Instagram @LeslieGustafson1 For products and programs to grow, enhance and transform your life, relationships and intimacy visit  www.leslieGustafson.com/shop

In this first episode of The Smart Sex Podcast 2.0 that explores the benefits of sex at both the beginning and end of the conversation,   Leslie and her former producer Kristen Wheeler talk real about women, sex and their experience in partnerships and marriage.   Old myths about male and female sexual and emotional connection dynamics and how they develop are explored. In addition, what are the common needs, wants and  attitudes of women and men around sex and connection and how they can be bridged.    "Are men's and women's needs really that different or not?"   Antidotes are offered around the often "Catch 22" power struggle that keeps many men and women circling in patterns of tension and conflict instead of harmony in their sexual life together.   Other potent questions are answered:   "Is there more to what a man is saying when he proclaims, 'I want sex'? " What is the meta message?    "Is it true women more than men's sexuality must be "activated"?"   This question opened up education about how women's sexual brains work and how to increase turn- ons.   Permission for self-care, personal satisfaction and empowerment for women in sustaining sexual interest and want, particularly for Mothers who often feel pressure and demand that shuts down desire, is given wholeheartedly.   Finally, how to elevate sexual communication between partners was taught.   Thank you for listening!   Feel free to visit www.LeslieGustafson.com/shop to receive your FREE gift.   The Smart Sex Podcast can be heard on all major podcast platforms.   You can also follow along on Instagram at www.Instagram.com/thesmartsexpodcast   And ask Questions at www.TheSmartSexPodcast.com