Beyond Help (A Sinclair Wants to Help! Multi-part Adventure)

Join Sinclair for a mid-mid-hiatus sci-fi Christmas adventure pushing the limits of copyright law! He teams up with one of fiction's most legendary figures with a PhD and hijinks ensue! (These events take place between episodes 2 and 3 of Beyond Help)CW: Sci-fi violence, loud noises, irreverent humor

Episode 3 of Beyond Help still needs a bit more time, so in the meantime, check out an episode from a friend of the show, SCP Research Archives. But not before Sinclair makes a quick hello, with a sneak peek at the next episode of Beyond Help! SCP Content Warnings: Depictions of bodily harm, a man in a costume made of real cat fur, mosquitos, force feeding, blunt force trauma, self disembowelment, implied cannibalismSinclair Content Warnings: depictions of gambling, loud screaming, implied violent burningFollow Sinclair on Tumblr and BlueSkyFrom the Original Episode description:Link to the episode on Pinecast: https://pnc.st/s/scp-research-archives/254d8a05/scp-3166-you-have-no-idea-how-alone-you-are-garfield-Link to our RSS feed: https://pinecast.com/feed/scp-research-archivesSCP-3166: https://scp-wiki.wikidot.com/scp-3166Content warnings include: Depictions of bodily harm, a man in a costume made of real cat fur, mosquitos, force feeding, blunt force trauma, self disembowelment, implied cannibalismSCPRA is a horror comedy improv podcast set in Site-[REDACTED]'s Archival Department. The Head Archivist, Bertran, processes and records SCP articles for the Site Director's self proclaimed "Accessibility Initiative". This, on top of their usual archival duties, has our poor archivist very tired. Hopefully nothing bad comes of that!Bertran is played by Izze Sykes, the Director is played by [Redacted], and SCP-3166 is by Tanhony.Intro/Outro music is Night of Chaos by Kevin MacLeod (incompetech.com), licensed under a Creative Commons: By Attribution 4.0 license.Additional music is by Bryan Baker https://makelovelikewar.bandcamp.com/All SCP content is used under Creative Commons Attribution-ShareAlike 3.0 LicenseGarfield was created by Jim Davis

Reuploaded with a much less obnoxious echo!Episode 3 of Beyond Help isn't quite ready for release, but that doesn't mean the world of the story has stopped moving. Here's a message from Sinclair's dearly departed but ever present friend, The Ghost of Orson Welles, popping out to say hello well before his proper debut, and humbly asking for your assistance in helping the series grow. Starring Jason Warner as The Ghost of Orson WellesGet updates on the show by following Sinclair on BlueSky and Tumblr!https://bsky.app/profile/sinclair-god4hire.bsky.socialhttps://sinclairwantstohelp.tumblr.com/?source=share

Content Warning:Historical war violence, depictions of historical figures, discussion of history, use of firearms, use of firearms, alcohol use, character death, irreverent humor and song lyrics, and adult language.The adventure continues as Sinclair and The Daylight begin their travels together. Sinclair, however, has the attention span of an intoxicated gnat, and has delayed a 12 hour drive into a week and a half, stopping at countless tourist traps on their journey to Nashville, much to The Daylight's chagrin. Upon stopping at a historical fast food restaurant in Corbin, Kentucky, The Daylight has had enough of his antics, and decides to take some time to partake in her favorite pastime- killing vampires. There's also a front seat display of Sinclair’s past, with a flashback to his time in the American Civil War- and how he assassinated General Stonewall Jackson. Beyond Help stars Mel Nichols as The Daylight and Lauren Tucker as Countess Sanguine AmantoEpisode 2 “Let Them Cry, “Dirty Traitor” “ features Scott R McKinley as Abraham Lincoln and Stonewall JacksonAJ Fidalgo as Edwin StantonAlex Birks as WaylonIzze Sykes as CharlieRebecca Krause as JenningsChrisi Talyn Saje as GailMaddie Cooper as the Fast Food Worker Additional Voices performed by Sean Drabik Written, directed, and produced by Sean DrabikWith Associate Producers Lauren Tucker and Mel NicholsStory Consultant Cat KirbyScript Editor Lumi OakesPublic Domain Music and Film Audio:Revielle Variations performed by the US Army Old Guard Fife and Drum CorpsThe Battle Hymn of the Republic performed by the US Air Force BandMarching Through Georgia performed by Clarence WhitehallThe Dover Boys at Pimento University directed by Chuck JonesDisorder in the Court directed by Jack White (under the pseudonym Preston Black)Shenandoah performed by The United States Air Force Academy BandVirginia Blues performed by The Bar Harbor Society OrchestraI Wanna Go Back to Dixie by Tom LehrerWhen Johnny Comes Marching Home performed by the United States Air Force BandWhen Johnny Comes Marching Home performed by the USMA BandDemonstration performed by Marsel MingaDixie's Land performed by the United States Military Academy BandBattle Hymn of the Republic performed by Frank C. Stanley and Elise Stevenson

Content Warnings:Irreverent humor and song lyrics, loud noises, use of firearms, public displays of violence, character death, use of alcohol, and adult language. The long trip starts here! Sinclair, a million-year-old minor level deity with a penchant for vagrancy and financial scheming, has been, for the first time in many hundreds of thousands of years, staying in one place and biding his time, forced into suburban settlement through mysterious circumstances. He's become friends (?) with some of the local vampire population and found a restaurant with good boneless wings, but even those aren't enough to keep him from being agitated by seemingly endless waiting. What is he waiting for? For the centerpiece of his long task, a mythological vampire hunter who slashes through the undead like the sun cutting away darkness, known simply as The Daylight. But when she finally arrives, she's far from being up to a conversation with Sinclair, and quickly goes on the attack. Can Sinclair, in a weakened state, keep up with this woman with the destructive personality of a tornado? Why has Sinclair been forced to stand still in time? Why does The Daylight hate vampires so much? And will she be lured to working with him when he reveals his task- hunting down Countess Sanguine Amanto?Beyond Help stars Mel Nichols as The Daylight and Lauren Tucker as Countess Sanguine Amanto. Episode 1, “Me Here, At Last, On the Ground,” featuresHera Alexander as RussellMichael E. Freemantle as BertrandWalter Mack as LyleCat Kirby as AnnieIzze Sykes as FortunatoAnd Chrisi Talyn Saje as GailAdditional voices provided by Sean DrabikProduced, written, and directed by Sean DrabikWith Associate Producers Lauren Tucker and Mel Nichols ,Script Editor Lumi Oakes And Story Consultant Cat KirbyMusic and Sound Effects in the Public Domain:Twelve From the Black Book 4/03/01 by Lloyd RogersSee Me Through by The Cimmaron Show ReviewAfter You've Gone performed by the US Coast Guard BandI Ain't Got Nobody performed by Marion HarrisWe Will All Go Together When We Go by Tom LehrerConcerto for Two Violins in D-Minor 1-Fast performed by Lloyd Rogers and Cartesian Reunion Memorial OrchestraNon Sara by FrantiDanse Macabre performed by KatapoltoWalk That Dog performed by The US Army Blues BandSt. James Infirmary performed by United State Airforce Academy BandBlue Skies performed by William Robyn

Premiering May 10th!It's finally time- Beyond Help premieres this May! Sinclair returns on a journey with a mysterious vampire hunter, called The Daylight. Together, they meet friends and enemies from Sinclair's past as they make their way to Ireland, so The Daylight can have a final confrontation with the Vampire who set her life on this course- Countess Sanguine Amanto. It's an adventure so big, we had to do a soft reboot. Premiering this May! This trailer features Mel Nichols, Lauren TuckerMichael E. Freemantle Alex BirksIzzy SykesAnnounced by AJ FidalgoMusic Featured created by Anonymous420, acquired through Free Music Archive, and used under Attribution 4.0 license. links:Corner: https://freemusicarchive.org/music/Anonymous420/___1389/Anonymous420_-____-_01_Overtime Matrix:https://freemusicarchive.org/music/Anonymous420/___1389/Anonymous420_-____-_08__/Changes have been made to suit the purposes of this trailer

Sinclair is back, just in time for the Holidays! The daffy deity just wants to enjoy a lonely Christmas with his cat, a copious count of cocktails, and enough Detroit-style pizza to feed the militia of a small state. But a visit from the ghost of an occasional business associate drags Sinclair into the heart of a neo-Dickension nightmare. But Sinclair is no Scrooge, and the future holds little anxiety for a deathless creature of a million years of age. The past however... Will Sinclair's love of alcohol keep him safe from his past, or will he be forced to face his many, many mistakes? And what is the gold ring around his hat, that he claims has crippled his powers? Find out in this festively depressing adventure! This podcast episode includes depictions of alcoholism and drug use, depictions of trauma, disregard for consent and physical boundaries, and depictions of seasonal depression. Listener discretion is advised.  A Drunkard's Christmas Carol starred, in order of appearance:  Maude Willis as The Narrator Jess McCoy as Kaleidoscope  Tyler Moody as Bradley Mel Nichols as The Ghost of Christmas Yet to Come Lauren Tucker as The Ghost of Christmas Present Scott R McKinley as The Ghost of Christmas Past Featuring appearances by  Michael E Freemantle as Bertrand  Cat Kirby as Annie Hera Alexander as Russell  Walter Mack as Lyle  Other voices provided by Sean Drabik Written, directed and produced by Sean Drabik Lumi Oakes is Script Editor Cat Kirby is Story Consultant Additional audio editing by Jess McCoy All music and film audio used are in the Public Domain Alex Birks is the announcer

Sinclair's full interview with MeevTeevNeev News, a preview of the upcoming audio drama series "Beyond Help" The Changeling Reporter was played by AJ Fidalgo Kaleidoscope was played by Jess McCoy The Screaming Voice was Alyssa Roldan and Lauren Tucker appeared as Countess Sanguine Amanto. Additional sound editing by Jess McCoy. Music and sound effects are in the public domain "I Ain't Got Nobody" performed by Marion Harris "Blue Skies" performed by William Robyn "Selling Out" and "N'T" by Tom Lehrer

Ian has gone to Sanguine, leaving Riley Kiley and Sinclair forced to put aside their issues and try to rescue him. But does Sinclair's plan put Ian in even more danger? Check out the conclusion of Duality!content warnings: Discussion or depictions of suicide, sexuality, alcohol abuse, death, disease, and conspiracyPublic Domain songs used:I'm Gonna Get You performed by Mamie Smith and her Jazz HoundsI'm a Jazz Vampire performed by Marion Harris

Sinclair and Sanguine have another discussion over dinner, and Ian receives a package in the mail. content warnings: Discussion or depictions of suicide, sexuality, alcohol abuse, death, disease, and conspiracy

In the second part of Duality, Sinclair meets Ian's best friend and learns just how committed Sanguine is to acquiring him. Sinclair teaches them both about vampires and goes to meet an old friend of his for help. content warnings:Discussion or depictions of suicide, sexuality, alcohol abuse, death, disease, and conspiracy.

In the first part of a multi-part story, Sinclair meets the meek journalist Ian Price, and takes on the job of protecting him from the advances of a beautiful and terrifying vampire Countess, Sanguine Amanto.content warnings:Discussion or depictions of suicide, sexuality, alcohol abuse, death, disease, and conspiracy.

Send us a textIn this episode, Sinclair teaches about the dangers of reading other people's mail. Go ahead, take a peek!Content Warning: References to historical tragedy and terroristic acts.

Send us a textSinclair has been hired to hunt down the Pied Piper of Hamelin, to take revenge for what was taken from the village. Don't blow off this story! Content Warning: References to human trafficking, implications of child abuse, depictions of violence, and depictions of animal death.

Send us a textSinclair returns with a story of technology and innovation from the dawn of time! Let the good times roll!A special thanks to the Not-Quite-Ready-for-Primitive-Time Players, who are:Jacob BirksClay ClarkRen

Send us a textIn this installment of Sinclair Wants to Help!, Sinclair tells the story of one of his dear friends, Milo Pendry, America's Happiest Executioner. You'll hear how he became beloved by townsfolk and condemned prisoners alike, how he crusaded against the electric chair, and how he became a performing superstar. You'll be hanging at every word!Content Warning:Depictions of Capitial Punishment, Outlandish Animal Cruelty, Grieving for Loss of a Loved One, Parricide

Send us a textIn this episode of Sinclair Wants to Help!, Sinclair tells a story of zealous worship, raucous music, and the brutal murder of beloved royal icons. You can't help falling in love with this bizarre mystery told by Sinclair the Soultradesmen!Content Warning:Depiction of crime scene, Serial Murder, Allusions to Sexual Harrassment

The series has undergone a soft reboot! Please only come here if you've listened to Beyond Help Episodes 1 and 2 and are curious about what the show was like before. ...and if you can tolerate really bad editing, as opposed to kind of bad editing.Updated and Improved mix and cut! In the first episode of Sinclair Wants to Help!, Sinclair introduces himself, and tells the history of Lenny Sarkon, the Megaladon Corporation, and a pet craze that was doomed to the cutest of tragedies. You'll really want to sink your teeth into it!Content Warning: Violence, Drug Use, Outlandish Animal Cruelty

An Important Beyond Help Announcement

Beyond Help continues as The Daylight awakens to find herself captured by Confederate soldiers of a supernatural persuasion: vampires, werewolves, bug monsters, and creatures beyond time and space making up the ranks of this motely battalion. Soon, The Daylight finds herself face to face with the Confederate'Confederate's leader, who comes to her with a proposal- but unbeknownst to her, this resurrected general happens to be an old opponent of Sinclair’s...Content Warnings: depictions of and allusions to historical and modern bigotry, Confederate sympathizing far right ideaology, violent character death, character on death bed, burning flesh, gunfire, explosions, stabbing, decapitation, uncomfortable sexism, loud noises, screaming, kidnapping, depcitions of trauma, alcohol use, tense situations, irreverent humor, supernatural horrorBeyond Help stars Mel Nichols as The Daylight and Lauren Tucker as Countess Sanguine AmantoEpisode 3: Funerals and Chases starred Scott R McKinley as Stonewall JacksonAlyssa Roldan as DunnAnna Stein as KeelAlex Birks as WaylonIzze Sykes as Charlie, and as TalesJess McCoy as Zok ChoobleAdditional voices provided by Sean DrabikWritten, directed, and produced by Sean DrabikScript Editor is Lumi Oakes Story Consultant is Cat KirbyLauren Tucker and Mel Nichols are associate producersAll music and sound effects are public domain, or purchased from royalty free collections that do not require attributionSome audio comes from Ovani Sound and Audio HeroBluesky: https://bsky.app/profile/sinclair-god4hire.bsky.socialTumblr: https://sinclairwantstohelp.tumblr.com/?source=share