Pondoff's Anonymous

At one point in his addiction, Edd Cockrell made a decision that seemed perfectly reasonable to him at the time: quit his job, cash out his retirement savings, and dedicate his life to using crystal meth.In Part 2 of his conversation with Pondoff's Anonymous, Edd picks up where his story left off, recounting the chaos of addiction in Los Angeles, living out of his car, the unexpected friendship that introduced him to Crystal Meth Anonymous, and the devastating loss of someone who helped him find recovery.After a period of sobriety, Edd convinced himself he could drink and use drugs again without losing control. What followed was another descent into addiction, isolation, and despair that eventually brought him to the brink of taking his own life.But Edd's story doesn't end there.He shares the circumstances that finally led him to treatment, the role his family played in his recovery, and how he's now using his experiences to create the sense of community he spent so many years searching for.From organizing events in his hometown of New Athens to helping expand access to Crystal Meth Anonymous meetings in the St. Louis area, Edd's journey is a reminder that our darkest experiences don't have to define what comes next.A powerful conversation about grief, second chances, finding purpose, and the life-changing power of showing up for others.

Growing up gay in a small, conservative Southern Illinois town, Edd Cockrell spent much of his early life struggling to reconcile who he was with who he believed he was supposed to be.In Part 1 of this powerful two-part conversation, Edd joins Pondoff's Anonymous to share his journey through religious trauma, coming to terms with his sexuality, an HIV diagnosis at just 21 years old, and the addiction that would eventually take him from the Midwest to the streets of Los Angeles.Edd opens up about the search for belonging, the devastating grip of crystal meth, homelessness, and the surprising ways he continued helping others even while struggling to save himself.It's an honest, sometimes heartbreaking, and often hilarious conversation about identity, acceptance, addiction, and the lengths we'll go to in search of connection.And as Edd's story unfolds, the darkest chapters are still ahead.

Laurel Miller has been through more than most people could imagine, and she's not afraid to talk about it.This week on Pondoff's Anonymous, Laurel shares her experience growing up with bipolar disorder, how prescription painkillers led to heroin addiction, and the trauma that kept her trapped in a cycle of substance use, isolation, and repeated trips to treatment.She opens up about surviving sexual assault, a suicide attempt, the challenges of motherhood during active addiction, and what it felt like to relapse after building a career helping other people find recovery.Laurel also shares how she rebuilt her life, found her way back to recovery, and eventually married Jakob Miller, executive director of Illinois Recovery Center and a familiar face to Pondoff's Anonymous listeners.It's a raw, sometimes heartbreaking conversation about mental health, addiction, motherhood, unconditional love, and why the road to recovery isn't always a straight line.

Jessica Horn joins Chris and KG on this week's episode of Pondoff's Anonymous to share a story of childhood trauma, addiction, forgiveness, and a life she once never imagined possible.Jessica opens up about her mother leaving when she was just five years old, being kicked out of her home at sixteen, surviving sexual assault, and the complicated relationships that shaped her early life. She also talks about her struggles with alcohol and drugs, the consequences of her addiction, and how recovery helped her begin to understand and heal from the experiences she'd carried for years.Through the 12-step program, Jessica found more than sobriety. She found a new perspective on her past, the ability to forgive, a loving relationship, and a sense of purpose in helping others.After dropping out of high school, Jessica eventually returned to school and earned her Bachelor of Science in Nursing, with help from The Next Step, an organization providing educational opportunities to people in recovery. Now a registered nurse, she's looking ahead to becoming a psychiatric mental health nurse practitioner.It's a conversation about breaking cycles, finding forgiveness, and discovering that your past doesn't have to determine your future.

Kris Glickert joins us this week to share a recovery story that didn't exactly follow a straight line.Kris talks about going from drinking with friends in high school to becoming physically dependent on alcohol in his early 20s, hiding his drinking while working in the restaurant industry, and the friends who finally showed up at his house and took him to treatment.But getting help didn't mean everything immediately clicked. Kris opens up about drinking again the same day he left treatment, eventually reaching a point where he was simply done, and finding a version of recovery that actually worked for him.We also talk about nearly 5,000 days sober, family, fatherhood, working in an industry surrounded by alcohol, and why there's more than one way to build a life in recovery.And, naturally, we spend a completely reasonable amount of time talking about Sugarfire, barbecue and St. Louis restaurants.