WTF is AuDHD?

Content warning: this episode touches on assault, trauma and manipulation. Listen with care.Disclaimer: this was recorded before Britney Spears' arrest on March 5th.In this episode of WTF is AuDHD?, Ellie and Paige dive into a candid conversation about how the world - and the systems around us - often fail neurodivergent people.Observing the experiences of celebrities like Britney Spears, Billie Eilish, Lewis Capaldi, and Demi Lovato, we lightly explore how fame can amplify the challenges of living with ADHD, autism, or AuDHD - especially when diagnosis comes late or is misunderstood.From public “meltdowns” to media scrutiny, the conversation looks at what might actually be happening beneath the surface: rejection sensitivity, burnout, trauma, and the pressure of living in a world not built for neurodivergent brains. And how the systems fail us entirely, leading to isolation and reckless behaviour.Ellie shares her long‑standing fascination with famous child stars and why so many of them seem to struggle, plus she shares her own experiences of being in the spotlight as an undiagnosed AuDHDer. Paige shares her experiences of feeling used, abused and discarded once she expressed what she needed - and the ongoing trauma that comes with that.This episode explores:Why so many famous people appear to be neurodivergentThe link between creativity, success, and ADHD/autismHow fame can intensify rejection sensitivity and burnoutWhy women are so often misdiagnosedAnd why empathy matters when we see someone struggling in the public eyeAs always, this conversation is honest, curious, and unfiltered - and based on our personal opinions and analysis. LinktreeSOCIAL @wtfisaudhdpodcastBook a session with Ellie ellieonthetelly.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week’s episode is a raw, unfiltered check-in where Ellie and Paige sit down (slightly lower in energy than usual), to talk honestly about how they're feeling - burnout, survival mode, and what can happen when your nervous system has been holding it together for too long. We talk financial stress under capitalism, sensory overload, relief instead of achievement and why the world feels especially heavy right now for neurodivergent people.We also discuss a listener post from our Reddit (and no, the Reddit isn't fixed sorry), about whether AuDHD is a good name for the neurotype of meeting criteria for both autism and ADHD.Note: Ellie's audio goes funny around 27 mins due to an accidental mute... woops! We have cut a segment out regarding medication that we will re-record for a future episode.Book a chat with Ellie ellieonthetelly.comSOCIAL @wtfisaudhdpodcastLinktree Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, we kick things off with a real-life catch-up - burnout, taking back your power, and why stories like figure skater Alysa Liu (Olympic Gold Medalist) matter so much when it comes to ADHD and redefining success. We also get into another cracking poll about how you eat your meals - riveting content, we know! Plus Ellie shares something she’s been grappling with this week and what she wishes she’d known earlier.In the second half, we’re joined by ADHD coach Marium to unpack what ADHD coaching actually looks like in practice. We talk about common goals ADHDers bring to coaching, why execution is often harder than knowing what to do, and how mindset and systems work together. Marium shares powerful strategies for task initiation, increasing interest levels, and getting unstuck without shame.We also cover what to look for in a qualified ADHD coach, how often coaching is most effective, and why you don’t have to do this alone.Contact Marium adhd-empowered.com Book a session with Ellie ellieonthetelly.comSOCIAL @wtfisaudhdpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This episode is split into two parts - the first part is banter between Paige and Ellie. We chat about recent hacks and learnings we've had, we discuss the differences we're noticing in our biometrics (recorded by our Oura rings) and we also clarify why you may not have been let into our Reddit yet...Then we learn - WTF is ADHD coaching? And how is it different from therapy or life coaching? We’re joined by ADHD coach Marium (from ADHD Empowered), who shares how she moved from corporate life and international teaching into specialised ADHD coaching after seeing how misunderstood and unsupported neurodivergent people often are.We unpack:Who ADHD coaching is for (from teens to late-diagnosed adults)How to know if you’re “ready” for coachingThe key differences between ADHD coaching, therapy, and traditional life coachingHow coaches help clients who know what to do but can’t executeAddressing shame, grief, and the belief that you’re “broken”Marium explains why ADHD coaching focuses on the “what” and “how” rather than the “why,” how understanding your brain can be life-changing, and why strengthening executive function matters more than visualising success.Next week, we'll play out the other half of our chat where Marium provides practical advice and some reassuring words for our fellow ADHDers.Contact Marium if you're interested in ADHD coaching HERE.Book a session with Ellie at ellieonthetelly.comLINKTREESOCIAL @wtfisaudhdpodcast Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Trigger Warning: This episode includes discussion of suicidal thoughts, emotional manipulation / boundaries and trauma. Please listen with care.In part two of our conversation with Jen, we go deeper into the cost of living in survival mode for almost five decades - and what happens when the body and brain can no longer keep up.Jen shares how perimenopause intersected with her AuDHD and long-term burnout, amplifying symptoms and stripping away coping mechanisms that had held her together for years. We unpack early warning signs of burnout and perimenopause that are often missed or misattributed, particularly in late-diagnosed neurodivergent women.We talk about delayed processing and how it has impacted Jen’s relationships, safety, and sense of self — including how manipulation and abuse can go unnoticed until the nervous system finally has space to process what happened. Jen reflects on how pursuing a PhD exposed both her strengths and her limits, and the profound toll this took on her mental health.This episode is an honest, vulnerable conversation about collapse, grief, and the necessity of radically changing your life when survival is no longer sustainable. It’s for anyone who feels like they’ve been “coping” for decades - and are only now realising the cost.FOLLOW @autistic_connections (Jen)Book a session with Ellie ellieonthetelly.comSOCIAL @wtfisaudhdpodcastLINKTREE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In part one of our conversation with Jen @autistic_connections, we get chatting about the reality of being a late diagnosed AuDHD women, who also hit burnout in conjunction with perimenopause (poor Jen!).Jen shares her journey to diagnosis, how she was completely missed as a child, and then given incorrect diagnoses throughout her 20s, and the juxtaposition of being 'smart' but feeling 'dumb'. Jen talks about struggling with “basic” daily tasks, yet being capable of getting First Class Honours at University, before her nervous system hit breaking point, and how autistic burnout was the catalyst for diagnosis.We talk about what it’s like to be a deeply empathetic person who sometimes struggles with connection, and we explore the difference between cognitive and affective empathy, and how misunderstanding empathy in autistic people causes harm.Jen also opens up about the grounding, regulating role her two dogs play in her life - each meeting different emotional needs.In next week's episode, Jen covers early signs of her neurodivergent tendencies, how autistic burnout and perimenopause interact with each other, why she had to leave her pHD and how she's coping with life now that she has more answers.Follow Jen on Instagram @autistic_connections Book a 1:1 session with Ellie at ellieonthetelly.comSOCIAL @wtfisaudhdpodcastLINKTREE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, we unpack decision fatigue and decision paralysis - why even simple choices can feel overwhelming for AuDHD brains. We explore how years of masking disconnect us from our instincts, leaving us frozen, second-guessing everything, and afraid to choose “wrong.” We share how paralysis has shown up in our own lives, and what’s actually helped. Paige also walks through her framework for rebuilding your life from the ground up when everything feels too hard to start.Book a 1:1 session with Ellie! ellieonthetelly.com - introductory rate of $30USD valid until Jan 31 2026.SOCIAL @wtfisaudhdpodcastLinktree Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We’re back for 2026! And we're starting off with an AuDHD debrief - funny holiday stories and what Ellie and Paige would do differently next holiday season. We also look ahead to what’s coming this year for WTF is AuDHD? - what we’re excited about, what we’re learning, and how we want to keep growing alongside this community.Plus, we dive into a nuanced and thoughtful discussion about Autistic Barbie - including your listener contributions. We discuss what it gets right, what feels complicated, and why seeing neurodivergent experiences reflected can be powerful. This also leads to a wider discussion on why representation matters so deeply - for everyone.Join us a for an easy, casual, welcome-back chat!SOCIAL @wtfisaudhdpodcastLinktree Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Sarah (social worker, ADHD, OCD, PMDD and autistic) is back for more! In this episode we shift into language, identity, and the inner world of neurodivergence. Sarah reflects on her childhood as an undiagnosed AuDHDer, the anxiety that masked her ADHD, and elaborates on the different ways boys vs girls are treated.We explore dialectical thinking - the simple but powerful practice of using “and” instead of “but” - and why it’s especially transformative for neurodivergent people whose needs often conflict. Sarah also shares how her lived experience shapes her work in perinatal social work, and why finding community and personal joy isn’t really optional for neurodivergent people - it’s survival.Thanks for joining us this year! We really appreciate you. We'll be back Jan 20.Follow Sarah @neurodialecticalLinktree - find our online communities and register your interest for 1:1 sessions with Ellie in 2026 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

We're super excited to be joined by neurodivergent parent and social worker Sarah (@neurodialectical on Instagram), who shares how becoming a parent was the catalyst for her diagnoses - including autism, ADHD, OCD, PTSD, and PMDD. We talk candidly about the sensory reality of parenting when your needs directly clash with your child’s, the rage and grief no one prepares you for, and why planning life around hormonal cycles can be helpful (if you can). Sarah also shares how she’s unlearning traditional parenting norms, prioritising autonomy over compliance, and raising her son in ways that protect his nervous system - even when it looks "unconventional". Sarah is super honest, raw and validating for any neurodivergent parent who’s ever felt overwhelmed, ashamed, or like they’re doing it “wrong.”Follow Sarah @neurodialecticalLINKTREE - join our Reddit, Discord and express interest in 1:1 sessions with Ellie in 2026 Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, Ellie's running on lack of sleep thanks to the Formula One race overnight, so we're chatting about sleep! We dig into why sleep is such a challenge for neurodivergent brains - from revenge bedtime procrastination to sensory overload to busy brains and chronic sleep debt. We share our own experiences and how lack of rest affects everything from emotion regulation to basic functioning. Join our Discord and Reddit! Links in our LinktreeInterested in a 1:1 session with Ellie in 2026? Register your interest ellieonthetelly.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Content warning: in this episode we lightly touch on abuse, manipulation and sexual assault - between 37 - 40mins - proceed with care.In this episode we dive into one of the biggest neurodivergent struggles: boundaries. Why do so many AuDHD people become chronic people-pleasers? Why do we say yes when every part of our body is screaming no? Why do we only realise afterwards how we're actually feeling? And why does setting even the smallest boundary feel like we’re letting someone down?We chat about the link between neurodivergence and people pleasing, how RSD, masking and social survival instincts shape our boundaries (or lack thereof) and we candidly discuss how we're personally going with improving our boundaries.Want a 1:1 mentoring chat with Ellie? Express your interest here: ellieonthetelly.comJoin our Discord and Reddit - links in our Linktree Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week we’re joined by Bayley Garnham - diagnosed dyspraxic and neuro-affirming Personal Trainer! Bayley shares his diagnosis journey, what dyspraxia can actually look like day-to-day, how dyspraxia affected him growing up and what inspired him into personal training.We chat about why exercise can vary depending on biological sex, why so many of us need movement but struggle to start, and how PTs can better support neurodivergent clients. Bayley also breaks down how he trains people with compassion, flexibility and zero shame.If you’ve ever felt intimidated by exercise, disconnected from your body, or you're unsure where to begin, this episode might be for you!Follow Bayley on Instagram (@bayleygarnham) or get in touch via email bayleygarnham@gmail.com Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this episode, we unpack the perfectionism cage - the invisible set of rules we build for ourselves as AuDHDers in an attempt to survive, succeed, or simply avoid judgement. We talk about how perfectionism showed up in our childhoods, how it morphs into procrastination and paralysis, and why so many of us cling to impossible standards even when they burn us out.JOIN OUR DISCORD Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

It’s not personal, we just literally forgot you existed. This week we dive into the concept of object permanence. We chat about why AuDHDers struggle to remember things, hobbies, goals and people once they’re out of sight, how it impacts friendships and daily life, and what we’ve learned about how to manage it.Vote for us for Listener's Choice at the NZ Podcast awards (if you want) HERESOCIAL @wtfisaudhdpodcastLINKTREE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

For so many neurodivergent people, friendships can feel confusing, draining, or just out of reach. In this episode we open up about growing up lonely, the ache of wanting connection, and how RSD can destablise you from reality. We touch on a listener submission - should you tell your friends about your diagnosis? We also share how our dogs have helped us with being at peace in our own company and have also helped with our general motivation!Vote for us at the NZ Podcast Awards for Listener's Choice! VOTE HERE. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Paige is back! If you've always secretly found travelling stressful and wondered why it looks so fun for everyone else - we see you. In this episode, we’re unpacking why holidays and travel can feel so overwhelming as a neurodivergent person. Freshly off the plane, Paige reflects on her recent trip and what accomodations she made for herself. We talk about why AuDHDers find travelling stressful and also reflect on some recent listener Reddit posts about perimenopause.VOTE FOR US (if you want) at the NZ PODCAST AWARDS for Listener's Choice! VOTE HERE.SOCIAL @wtfisaudhdpodcastLinktree Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

What about the after part of ADHD diagnosis? Bree Tomasel joins us for a follow up chat about her diagnosis experience and feelings. Bree shares her experience with the weird limbo of diagnosis imposter syndrome, the long road to getting meds right (four years, no joke), and she shares advice and things she's learned that have helped her.Paige is back next week! Also, if you'd like to vote our podcast for Listener's Choice at the NZ Podcast Awards, you can do that here.SOCIAL @wtfisaudhdpodcast // LinktreeFollow @breetomasel Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

The hilarious and wildly talented Bree Tomasel - broadcaster, creator, and late-diagnosed ADHDer - joins Ellie for a candid chat. Bree opens up about a lifetime of masking - not just her ADHD, but her anxiety and even her sexuality - and how she shaped her own career, while sometimes feeling 'dumb'. We hear about what she was like as an undiagnosed child and some of the early signs she now sees in hindsight. We talk about imposter syndrome, perfectionism, and how Bree channels her ADHD energy into sport and humour. Plus, Bree will be back next week for another chat where we debrief on life after diagnosis, self-acceptance, and what’s changed since learning she’s neurodivergent.Follow Bree: Instagram SOCIAL @wtfisaudhdpodcast LINKTREE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Happy ADHD Awareness Month! Ellie is back with her partner Sam for another candid chat about life with ADHD, and life as an neurodivergent couple. This week we explore what we wish people knew about ADHD, why feedback is so crucial for us as ADHDers, and we share the ways we've learned to split responsibilities at home. We also talk honestly about why ADHDers can be so tough on themselves and answer some more of your listener questions. SOCIAL @wtfisaudhdpodcastWatch on YouTubeLINKTREE Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.