Mindful Poetic Stories Podcast

Reflections; on a Self Love Journey The Power of the Pause on A Year of Self-Welcoming, Self-Love & Inner Wisdom   Episode 52 marks one full year of podcasting, and instead of rushing ahead, this episode was crafted from a mindful pause. A reflection on fear, self-sabotage, emotional intelligence, neuroscience, self-love, and the inner Sage that guides us home to ourselves. This episode weaves poetry, personal storytelling, philosophy, neuroscience, coaching insights, and poetic reflection to explore how our inner voices shape our lives, and how learning self-compassion, emotional regulation, and mindful self-care builds the strongest foundation of all: self-preservation through self-love. This is not a journey of “self-help,” but a self-welcoming journey, toward peace, resilience, meaning, and living in alignment with who you truly are.   Quotes from the Episode “No one teaches us how to talk to ourselves — and yet it shapes our entire life.” “Knowledge is only powerful when it’s applied.” “Knowing is 20%. Action is 80%.” “Labelling is disabling.” “The secret to change is to focus all your energy not on fighting the old, but on building the new.” Socrates “Peace is priceless.” “No one drives me crazy unless I hand them my keys.” “Self-compassion softens the harsh edges inside you.” “Life is never made unbearable by circumstances, but only by lack of meaning and purpose.”   Key Themes Explored The power of the pause and reflection Self-sabotaging inner voices (Victim, Pleaser, Stickler, Avoider) Emotional intelligence; EQ vs IQ Fear as a system of control vs inner awareness as liberation Ancient wisdom (Buddha, Confucius, Lao Tzu, Socrates) Neuroscience, neuroplasticity, and nervous system balance Fight-or-flight vs rest-and-digest Gut health, hormones, and emotional wellbeing Mirror work and healing unfelt pain Writing, creativity, and finding meaning Living in alignment with values Self-love as self-preservation   Key Takeaways Self-love is not indulgence, it is self-preservation Fear keeps us stuck; awareness sets us free Emotional intelligence is foundational to a fulfilling life Our brains are malleable, what’s learned can be relearned Healing happens through practice, not just knowledge Peace comes from within, not from controlling circumstances Self-compassion creates the safety needed for growth When we stop fighting ourselves, transformation begins Meaning and purpose make life bearable, and beautiful   Your time to Reflect & Journal What if the voice sabotaging you isn’t the truth, but an outdated coping mechanism? What happens when you stop fighting yourself and start listening to your inner Sage? How would your life change if you met yourself with unconditional love instead of judgment?   Final Note This episode is a celebration, of consistency, courage, healing, and a year of showing up. A huge thank you to everyone who has been involved, for their support and encouaragement, and a huge thank you to you my listeners for tuning in and turning up for you. With a reminder that you matter, that your inner wisdom is real, and that choosing self-love is a revolutionary act in a fear-driven world. If you’d like to explore positive intelligence coaching and mental fitness, you’re invited to reach out to me via email   As always, take care of you.   You matter. Today, tomorrow, and every day.   Email me hello@pacoaching.co.uk to find out more about positive intelligence coaching, mental fitness and the journey of self love, and to book a free no obligation discovery call  

Your Home Song; Coming home to the unshakeable foundation of self-love This episode is about you. Your journey of coming home to yourself. At the very heart of this podcast is the invitation to build a solid, unshakeable foundation of self-love, from the core of who you are.   Your Sage self. Your authentic essence.   In this deeply personal and reflective episode, Patricia shares her own journey from feeling unlovable, not good enough, and disconnected from herself to discovering the power of self-care, self-welcoming, and unconditional self-love. Through stories from childhood, school, comparison, shame, and healing, she explores how our private logic, early experiences, and internal saboteurs shape the way we see ourselves, and how we can rewrite those stories and heal.   This is an episode about mental fitness, emotional intelligence, Positive Intelligence coaching, and learning how to live from a place of inner peace, authenticity, and self-trust. Because when we come home to ourselves, we can stop merely surviving, and start living, thriving, and shining.   Quotes from this Episode; “The journey home to yourself with unconditional self-love is the strongest, most stable foundation you can live and grow from.” “Comparison is the thief of contentment, and for years, I didn’t know what was stealing mine.” “When I didn’t love myself, I was miserable. When I found self-love, I found the home within me, and I feel alive.” “Our true responsibility in this life is to be true to ourselves and love the miracle that we are.” “The distress is not the event, it’s what happens inside us as a result of the event. And that is always personal.” “True lovability begins when you choose to welcome yourself home.”   Key Concepts Explained Private Logic (Alfred Adler) Our private logic is the unconscious belief system we form most of the time in childhood based on our experiences, environment, perceptions and interpretations. It shapes how we see ourselves, others, and the world, and can either empower us or limit us.   Saboteur vs Sage (Positive Intelligence) Saboteurs: Fear-based survival patterns rooted in shame, comparison, and self-criticism Sage: The wise, loving inner voice that helps us thrive through curiosity, empathy, creativity, and purpose   Mental fitness work helps weaken saboteurs and strengthen the Sage, creating emotional resilience and wellbeing.   References Mentioned Alfred Adler – Individual Psychology & the concept of Private Logic Positive Intelligence® – Mental Fitness framework (Saboteur vs Sage) Daniel Goleman, Emotional Intelligence: Why It Can Matter More Than IQ (1995) Poem; Henry Van Dyke, A Home Song Journal; I’m Lovable – discovered at Waterstones, Piccadilly (2017)   Poetic Inspiration Henry Van Dyke – A Home Song “Every house where love abides, And friendship is a guest, Is surely home, and home-sweet-home: For there the heart can rest.”   Re-imagined for this episode: The world needs your unique authentic light. From the beautiful home within you. Find it, claim it, and let it shine.   Key Takeaways You are one of a kind; biologically, emotionally, neurologically Self-love is not selfish; it is the foundation of authentic living Childhood experiences shape beliefs, but they do not define your future Comparison erodes self-worth; authenticity restores it Emotional intelligence and mental fitness are essential life skills Healing begins when we tell our stories with compassion Your true home is within your body and being When you live from your Sage, you serve yourself, and others more fully   Recommendations Begin noticing your inner self sabotaging negative voices, without judgment Practice self-welcoming instead of self-criticism Book a discovery call with Patricia to explore Positive Intelligence mental fitness practices Develop emotional intelligence skills: self-awareness, self-regulation, empathy Write your own story; your words matter Protect your energy, peace, and uniqueness Choose yourself, again and again   Final Reflection Home is not just a place. Home is not something we earn. Home is where the heart rests, and the soul is at peace. And your truest home lives within you.   Come home to the one of a kind beautiful creation that is you.   Emails hello@pacoaching.co.uk Website www.pacoaching.co.uk      

Building Habits, Building You In this episode, Patricia dives into the powerful connection between self-care, identity, and habit formation. You’ll learn why habits, not resolutions, shape your future, how to become the “anthropologist” of your own life, and how tiny, consistent actions create long-term transformation. With insights from coaching, behavioural science, and personal stories, this episode guides you toward building habits that support a more intentional, compassionate, and fulfilling life.   Key Takeaways Habits shape your reality; Research suggests nearly half of our daily actions are habitual, often unconscious, and can steer us toward growth or self-sabotage. Interference holds us back; Coaching helps uncover the internal patterns (beliefs, fears, conditioning) that block your potential. Start small; Micro-habits bypass resistance and help your brain form new neural pathways with ease. Identity matters; As James Clear notes, habits stick when anchored to who you want to become, not just what you want to achieve. The RAS is always listening; Your brain filters information for whatever you focus on, so feed your intentions, not your fears. Habit formation takes time; The “21-day rule” is a myth. Research shows habits can take anywhere from 18 to 254 days to become automatic. Consistency over perfection; Missing a day doesn’t break a habit, but quitting on yourself does. Track, celebrate, repeat; Small wins activate dopamine and reinforce your identity as someone who follows through. Gentleness is non-negotiable; Long-term sustainable change is built on self-love, patience, and awareness, not pressure.   Quote; “People do not decide their futures, they decide their habits — and their habits decide their futures.” — F.M. Alexander   Referenced Research Habit Formation Research Phillippa Lally et al. (2009), University College London; Study finding an average of 66 days to reach habit automaticity (range 18–254 days).   Tiny Habits / Behaviour Design BJ Fogg, Stanford University — Behaviour Model and the science behind tiny habits.   Identity-Based Habits James Clear — Book, Atomic Habits   Coaching Foundations Timothy Gallwey — “Performance - Interference = Potential – Interference” Positive Intelligence - https://www.positiveintelligence.com/   Final Message This year, choose habits that honour who you are becoming. Start small, stay curious, celebrate every win, and build a foundation of self-love that can support meaningful, lasting change. You matter, today, this year, next year and every year.   Email me at hello@pacoaching.co.uk Website www.pacoaching.co.uk    

Reclaiming Your Power: Mental Fitness, Self-Love & the Sage Within   Episode Release: Christmas Eve Special   Episode Summary In this heartfelt Christmas Eve episode, Patricia is closing out the year by revisiting the core themes that have shaped our journey together: emotional resilience, self-love, and the transformative power of mental fitness. You’ll hear why many of us stay stuck in self-sabotage, how our “Saboteur” autopilot loops keep us in survival mode, and, most importantly, how reconnecting with your inner Sage is the key to lasting positive change.   This episode also includes an exciting announcement: one listener will win a Positive Intelligence Coaching Programme with me in the New Year!   If you’ve been feeling disconnected, battling self-doubt, or longing to lead a more intentional, empowered life… this is the episode that ties it all together.   Key Takeaways Self-Love Is a Revolutionary Act Drawing on the insights of Tina Lifford and Abiola Abrams, we explore why knowing and accepting yourself is the foundation of emotional resilience, empowerment, and genuine transformation.   Mental Fitness = Thriving, Not Just Surviving Mental fitness helps you shift from the self-neglect of Saboteur mode to the self-care and clarity of Sage mode. It allows you to recognise your internal programs, outdated beliefs, and survival-driven thought loops that hold you back.   The Autopilot Trap & Why Change Fails Many attempts at positive change fail because we live on autopilot, constantly pulled back by ingrained habits, limiting assumptions, and emotional survival patterns formed long ago.   Performance = Potential – Interference Based on Timothy Gallwey’s pioneering coaching work, we examine how your internal “interference patterns” drain your potential, and how Positive Intelligence coaching helps you dismantle them.   Your Inner Sage Is Always There Your intuitive wisdom, the Sage, is quiet but powerful. Strengthening it requires daily mental fitness practice, awareness, and the ability to pause, choose, and respond intentionally.   You Can’t Thrive and Survive at the Same Time Survival mode keeps you anxious, dysregulated, and limited. Sage mode opens the door to creativity, wellbeing, deeper relationships, and real happiness.   Happiness Leads to Success (Not the Other Way Around) Positive psychology confirms that cultivating happiness first boosts motivation, resilience, productivity, and life satisfaction.   Emotional Intelligence Matters More Than IQ Inspired by Daniel Goleman’s groundbreaking work, we discuss why emotional intelligence, not cognitive intelligence, matters more and is what truly shapes our success, fulfilment, happiness and meaningful relationships.   Transformation Begins With Your Relationship With Yourself To step into the future you desire, you must: Understand your internal programs Identify both strengths and sabotaging behaviours Quiet the inner critic Strengthen your intuitive Sage wisdom These are the foundations of personal power and mental fitness.   Episode Recommendations Practice the Power of the Pause As Viktor Frankl said: “Between stimulus and response, there is a space.” Use this space to reconnect with your Sage, regulate your emotions, and choose consciously instead of reacting from fear.   Begin a Simple Daily Mental Fitness Practice Small, consistent exercises that engage your Sage build new neural pathways and strengthen your emotional resilience. Engage your senses regularly and you will start to reconnect with your Sage.   Start an Internal Dialogue Audit Pay attention to your inner voices. Are they driven by fear, doubt, or outdated survival patterns, or by intuition, wisdom, and compassion?   Focus on Intentional Living Shift from autopilot to awareness. Choose habits that support your future self, not your old protective patterns.   Own Your Story Let go of self-doubt and reclaim your inner authority. Your personal power lies not in perfection, but in self-acceptance and alignment.   Listener Giveaway (Christmas Eve Special!) To celebrate the year and this journey of emotional growth, I’m gifting one listener a Positive Intelligence Coaching Programme in the New Year. Listen to the episode for details on how to enter!   Final Words Your inner Sage is never lost, it’s waiting to be heard. When you reconnect with it, you reclaim your worth, your voice, and your power. You become the author of your life.   Know yourself. Accept yourself. Love yourself. Because when you do, you become invincible.   Email me at hello@pacoaching.co.uk website www.pacoaching.co.uk  

The Christmas Gift of Presence: Digital Detox, Family Connection & The Power of Gratitude   Episode Summary In this heartfelt Christmas episode, Patricia shares two powerful personal stories from last year’s holiday season, one planned, one unplanned, that enhance her wellbeing over the festive holidays. From an intuitive two-week digital detox with her mum, to a family “Gratitude Attitude Jar,” she explores how unplugging, reconnecting, and receiving gratitude can profoundly impact mental health, emotional resilience, and joy.   Listeners will hear practical guidance for digital fasting, family connection, emotional awareness, and creative ways to build meaningful traditions that nurture peace, presence, and genuine human connection.   Key Takeaways Unplanned pauses can become the greatest gifts. A spontaneous digital break led to deeper connection, peace, and presence. Deadlines matter, but not more than people. What feels urgent often isn’t; what’s irreplaceable often is. Technology is designed to keep our attention. Taking it back requires awareness, limits, and compassion. Digital detoxing reduces stress and boosts creativity. Stepping back created space for workshops, games, and meaningful conversations. Gratitude is most powerful when it’s received, not just expressed. Research shows witnessing gratitude strengthens emotional and physical wellbeing. Small, consistent habits make digital boundaries easier. Start with 30 minutes, one room, or removing one app. Family rituals deepen connection. A gratitude jar, creativity prompts, or shared offline time can become cherished traditions.   Memorable Quotes “Sometimes the gift of switching off comes without being planned.” “Is a problem a problem if you don’t think it’s a problem?” “My mum won’t be here forever. I won’t be here forever. Deadlines can wait, making memories cannot.” “The digital world promised connection, but we are becoming more disconnected in real life.” “Start small. Half an hour. One hour. Build up. Reclaim your attention.” “Gratitude isn’t only about giving thanks, its potent power is in receiving it.” “The genuine exchange of gratitude costs nothing, but gives everything.” “Presence is the best Christmas gift any family can share.”   Episode Highlights Patricia’s intuitive choice to take a two-week tech-free Christmas with her mum Letting go of deadlines and perfectionism The reality of digital overwhelm and “nomophobia” Creative family connection rituals during the holidays Why tech leaders like Steve Jobs limited their own children’s device use Get creative and start your own digital fast or digital detox A deep dive into the “December Gratitude Attitude bottled” Research on gratitude, emotional wellbeing, and the power of receiving thanks Practical ways to nurture your attention, focus, and mental health A Christmas challenge to reclaim presence, joy, and connection   Tips & Recommendations Mentioned Digital Detox Ideas Create a family digital lockbox Synchronise “phone-off” times together Start with 30 to 60 minutes of tech-free time Limit use of one specific app Choose tech-free rooms (especially the bedroom) Make your phone not the first/last thing of the day Remove social media apps temporarily Take nature walks, visit friends, or plan creative games   Gratitude Practices Make a Gratitude Attitude Jar for the holiday season Read gratitude notes aloud as a family Create a Christmas Gratitude Journal o Morning: “10 things I’m grateful for” o Evening: “3 people who made my day happier” o Bedtime: “The best part of my day was…”   Research & Resources Huberman Lab Podcast: The Science of Gratitude https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=KVjfFN89qvQ   Message to Listeners A gentle reminder to choose presence over pressure. Your wellbeing matters 365 days a year, and the greatest gifts of the season are compassion, togetherness, love, and real-life connection.   To find out more about mental fitness or book a discovery call email hello@pacoaching.co.uk  

Rethinking Christmas; Stress, Mindset & Meaning A reflective, poetic look at the emotional weight of Christmas, and practical ways to bring calm, creativity, and connection back into the holidays.   In this heartfelt Christmas-themed episode, Patricia shares the story that inspired a powerful reframing of the season: a 2021 conversation with someone who “hated Christmas”, perhaps not so much for its meaning, but for its pressure. That conversation sparked a deeper exploration into stress, expectation, emotional reactivity, and how mental fitness can transform the holiday experience.   You’ll hear personal stories of family, loss, boundaries, overwhelm, creative traditions, and ultimately, how mindset shifts lead to a more peaceful, intentional holiday.   Key Takeaways: Most people don’t hate Christmas, they hate the stress, so normalised, round it. Consumerism, pressure, overspending, overconsumption, and emotional reactivity create anxiety that becomes normalised. Emotional intelligence changes everything. Building inner calm allows you to experience peace even during chaos, instead of running from stress. Expectations are the root of holiday burnout. Letting go of the “perfect Christmas” allows joy to emerge naturally. What you feed grows. Thoughts, beliefs, actions, they all expand where attention goes. Pause to ask: “Is this feeding what I want more of… or less of?” Power pauses are essential. Regular, mindful check-ins help you shift from reactivity to intentional response. Boundaries matter every day of the year. Healthy limits protect wellbeing, energy, and connection, especially during emotionally charged seasons. Creativity & connection can transform Christmas. Games, question boxes, writing challenges, outdoor adventures, and family “spotlight days” build meaningful memories without spending money. If you’re alone this Christmas, it can still be mindful and meaningful. Community events, volunteering, support lines, or simple rituals can create connection.   Practical Recommendations: Holiday Mental Fitness Practices The Power Pause: Ask yourself what you’re feeding right now, and adjust. Intentional breathing: Try box breathing (4-4-4). Emergency Relaxation Plan: Time in nature, a brisk walk, music, or mindful movement to reset your nervous system. Mindful Eating: Savour each bite , taste, texture, temperature.   Creative, Connection-Building Traditions Christmas Question Box: Everyone creates 3 questions to put into the box, and then everyone picks one at random to answer. Family Member of the Day: Celebrate one person intentionally. Nature Photo Stories: Each person takes one outdoor photo, then shares the story behind it. Family Writing Challenge: Create poems, limericks, haikus or stories from a shared prompt. Play, laugh, make fun memories: Encourage imagination, curiosity, mistakes, and silliness.   For anyone spending Christmas alone Check local churches/community centres for events. Visit Action to End Loneliness. https://www.campaigntoendloneliness.org/ Use free helplines such as Samaritans (116 123) or Shout (text SHOUT to 85258). Consider volunteering; its grounding, connecting, and meaningful.   Memorable Quotes from the Episode “Do you hate Christmas, or do you hate the hype, stress, and pressure we’ve normalised?” “What you feed grows! That includes our thoughts, your beliefs, your actions.” “I believed Christmas was uncontrollable stress… but now I can find peace even in chaos.” “Take ownership of you. Build emotional intelligence within yourself first.” “Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.” Wayne Dyer “Negative emotions aren’t the problem — staying in them is.” “Your health matters 365 days a year.” “You can’t use up creativity, the more you use, the more you have.” Maya Angelou “Creativity is inventing, experimenting, making mistakes, and having fun.” Mary Lou Cook “You matter 365 days of the year, look after you.” Book a discover call with Patricia by emailing hello@pacocahing.co.uk    

Introduction In this heartfelt December episode, Patricia shares stories of Christmases past, present, and future, and how the festive season, while full of joy, can also bring exhaustion, overwhelm, perfectionism, people-pleasing, and emotional strain. Patricia shares a poetic reflection on her former “autopilot Christmases,” the impact of mental fitness on transforming the holiday experience, and practical tools to help you reclaim peace, presence, and personal power this festive season. How you can not only survive Christmas but thrive through it.   Whether you celebrate Christmas or any other big holiday, this episode offers guidance to help you thrive, not merely survive.   Key Takeaways Christmas stress is often habit-driven. Much of the overwhelm comes from autopilot patterns: needing to control, please, or perfect everything. The Power of the Pause can transform your emotional experience, helping you choose peace, compassion, and presence rather than chaos and reactivity. A Personal Christmas Mission Statement brings clarity and intention to the season, helping you stay aligned with what truly matters. Emotional wellbeing > perfection. People remember connection, humour, and togetherness, not flawless dinners or pristine décor. Boundaries are essential. Saying yes to everything often means saying no to yourself. Support children with empathy. Christmas consumerism can heighten expectations; teaching emotional awareness and kindness helps them navigate disappointment. Joy is created, not bought. Connection, generosity, and shared traditions hold much deeper value than gifts.   Notable Quotes “Between every stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response.” – Viktor Frankl “No one can drive you crazy unless you give them the keys.” “This Christmas, begin with the end in mind and choose what truly matters to you.” “Your wellbeing is priceless, kindness and connection last longer than perfection.” “The power is not in the choice itself, but in consciously choosing.”   Practical Recommendations Write Your Personal Christmas Mission Statement Reflect on: Past Christmases—your memories, values, and lessons The present—your intentions and what you want to cultivate The future—how you want to feel in early January Turn your reflections into a short, positive, written daily reminder such as: “This Christmas, I choose………… calm, connection, and presence.”   Practice the Power of the Pause Use mindful pauses to: Regulate your emotions Reduce reactivity Redirect energy from chaos toward love, compassion, clarity, and peace   Let Go of Autopilot “Needs” Need to control: Prioritise kindness over being right; release tension for the greater good. Need to be perfect: Embrace imperfection. Chaos often becomes the story everyone laughs about years later. Need to please: Choose your “yes” and “no” consciously. Set boundaries. Ask for help. Delegate.   Support Children Emotionally Validate their feelings, especially around disappointment or comparison Use creative outlets to help them express emotions Teach the joy of giving with family kindness lists, handmade gifts, or toy donations   Remember What Christmas Is Really About Connection. Joy. Presence. Compassion. Shared moments—not perfect gifts or flawless planning.   Food you can buy more of! Gifts you can buy more of!   But time is something you can’t buy!   contact me via my website www.pacoaching.co.uk or email me hello@pacoaching.co.uk  

In this episode, Patricia explores the surprising science, psychology, and emotional wisdom behind tears. Why we cry and why it matters. From childhood beliefs about “crying alone,” to the therapeutic power of being seen, to the extraordinary microscopic landscapes of Rose-Lynn Fisher’s Topography of Tears, this conversation reveals why tears are far more than a sign of sadness, they’re a biological release, an emotional reset, and a universal human connector.   Introduction We often rush to stop our own tears, and the tears of others. Yet emotional tears are uniquely human and play a crucial role in healing, connection, and self-understanding. Today’s episode explores the biology of crying, why we’re uncomfortable with emotions, how coaching spaces can invite healthy release, and the unexpected beauty contained within a single tear drop.   Key Takeaways Emotional tears are biologically healing, releasing stress hormones and boosting oxytocin and endorphins. We often shut down tears due to discomfort, not compassion, yet supportive presence can make crying therapeutic. Tears can appear in coaching spaces when clients finally feel safe, seen, and heard. Microscopic tear patterns are unique, revealing emotional “landscapes” as shown in Rose-Lynn Fisher’s Topography of Tears. Crying is universal but deeply personal, influenced by culture, context, and human connection. Not all crying is cathartic, its healing depends on how others respond. Tears mark emotional turning points, allowing acceptance, release, and renewal. There is nothing to fear about tears, they connect us to ourselves and to one another.   Notable Quotes “We have nothing to fear from tears.” “Comforted tears heal, ignored tears may deepen pain.” “Tears are landscapes of emotion, tiny maps of the human soul.” “We cannot control the ocean, but we can learn to surf.” “Tears mark turning points, moments of acceptance, release, and renewal.” “If you need to cry, cry unapologetically.” “A safe space can turn tears into empowerment.”   Recommended Books The Topography of Tears – Rose-Lynn Fisher A stunning visual exploration of human emotion through microscopic tear photography. The Crying Book – Heather Christle A poetic, literary, and deeply moving examination of why humans cry. Why Humans Cry – Ad Vingerhoets A scientific look at crying, catharsis, and emotional expression. In Praise of Therapeutic Crying – Jeffrey Von Glahn (article) A compassionate exploration of crying as a healing tool   Contact me via my website www.pacoaching.co.uk or email hello@pacoaching.co.uk  

Listening The Art of Listening, Where Love Begins   Episode Summary In this reflective and heartfelt episode, Patricia explores the profound power of listening to others, to life, and most importantly, to ourselves. Drawing from personal stories, coaching experiences, and emotional lessons learned, this episode invites you to slow down, embrace silence, and reconnect with your inner Sage wisdom. You’ll learn why listening is one of the most transformational acts of love, how active listening nurtures deeper relationships, and how mental can help us cultivate self-listening and help us build emotional resilience, and meaningful human connection.   Key Takeaways Listening is the foundation of love and human connection. To feel listened to is to feel seen, valued, and loved. Listening builds trust, belonging, and emotional safety, things every human deeply needs. Silence is not emptiness, it's powerful. Silence helps nourish wisdom, create space for deeper reflection, and reveal truths often missed in noise and distraction. Active listening transforms relationships. Listening without interruption, judgment, fixing, or assuming allows others to process their own thoughts and uncover their own answers; “the brain that contains the problem also contains the solution.” Listening to yourself is an act of self-love. Your mind, body, intuition, and emotions are constantly communicating with you. When disconnected or distracted, you lose access to your inner wisdom. Our digital, fast-paced world weakens our listening muscles. Overconsumption and constant distraction make it easy to lose touch with our inner voice—and with each other. Advice is often less helpful than curiosity. Well-intentioned advice can interrupt someone’s thought process. Curious questions create space for clarity and empowerment. Mental fitness reduces self-sabotage and strengthens your inner Sage. By diminishing self-neglect and the self sabotaging Saboteur voice, you create space for intuitive, compassionate, aligned decision-making. We must relearn deep listening in our families. Partners, children, and friends thrive when we give them the gift of undivided attention, especially during emotional moments. Self-listening is needed before we can listen to others well. You cannot offer presence, compassion, or understanding if you don’t practice them with yourself first. Listening is love in action. A five-minute conversation where someone feels truly listened to is more nourishing than hours of distracted half-presence.   Notable Quotes “Silence is the sleep that nourishes wisdom.” Francis Bacon “Listening is an art form.” Nancy Kline “Love is listening, and listening is loving.” Patricia Ahern “Silence is not empty, it’s full of answers.” “The brain that contains the problem also contains the solution.” Nancy Kline “Listening is where love begins.” Patricia Ahern “Every view is the wrong view if held as the only view.” “Your brain is always eavesdropping on your mind.” “You are a miracle, and self-love is your most powerful asset.” Patricia Ahern   Your Call to Action This Week Make space to listen to others Offer someone you love the gift of your full, uninterrupted presence. No fixing. No advising. Just listening. Make space to listen to yourself Ask yourself with compassion: What do I think? What do I feel? What do I believe right now? Create micro moments of silence Let silence nourish your inner wisdom. Strengthen self-love through self-listening Place a hand on your heart and affirm your worth. Reconnect with your childhood self. Stop saying yes when your heart says no. Make meaningful time for yourself.   Final Reflection Listening heals. Listening connects. Listening helps us belong. And when we learn to listen deeply to others and to ourselves, we awaken our inner Sage and live with greater clarity, purpose, and compassion. Thank you for listening with an open heart, open mind, and open ears.   Connect through my website www.pacoaching.co.uk or email at hello@pacoaching.co.uk  

Mindful Poetic Stories Shownotes Episode Title: Consumerism Part 2 - From Self-Neglect to Self-Care: Breaking Free from Overconsumption and Finding Conscious Freedom Episode Introduction In this powerful and eye-opening episode, Patricia explores how modern consumerism, manipulation in marketing, and emotional conditioning keep us trapped in a cycle of problem–reaction–solution. Sharing her personal awakening to the hidden toxicity and waste surrounding daily life, she invites listeners to reflect on how our buying habits impact both our mental health and the planet. Through storytelling, cultural insights, and thought-provoking documentary recommendations including; The Story of Stuff, Ethos: A Time for Change, and Buy Now! The Shopping Conspiracy, Patricia invites us to slow down, buy mindfully, and reconnect with our values. This episode is a heartfelt call to move from self-neglect to self-care, from unconscious consumption to conscious living.   Key Takeaways We are conditioned to consume through emotional manipulation and social pressure. Overconsumption and “retail therapy” often mask deeper emotional needs. Fast fashion and planned obsolescence fuel environmental and human exploitation. Awareness is the first step toward sustainable, mindful change. Mental fitness and self-love are foundations for conscious living. Every purchase is a vote for the kind of world we want to create.   Featured Topics Eco-conscious living and reducing toxic exposure Fast fashion, Shein, and the hidden cost of cheap clothes Consumer psychology: marketing, persuasion, and emotional triggers Sustainability documentaries that inspire change Mindful consumption and small, practical steps to reduce waste Mental fitness and self-care coaching for a more intentional life   Notable Quotes “We don’t buy products, we buy what a product promises us.” “Awareness is the first step to move from unconscious living to mindful action.” “Our body is our ultimate home. When we love and care for it, we naturally care for our planet.” “Letting go gives us freedom and freedom is the only condition for happiness. If in our heart we still cling to anything be it anger, anxiety or possessions we cannot be free”. Thich Nhat Hanh   Recommended Documentary; The Story of Stuff (2007) Documentary; Ethos: A Time for Change (2011) Documentary; Buy Now! The Shopping Conspiracy (2024) Book; Brave New World   Call to Action If this episode inspired you, share it with friends, family, or your community. Start conversations about consumption, sustainability, and self-awareness. Remember — small consistent steps create lasting change.   www.pacoaching.co.uk email at hello@pacoaching.co.uk  

In this powerful episode, Consumerism to Mindful Activism (Part 1), Patricia explores the deep connection between our inner world and the outer choices we make. Patricia shares her personal journey from external pursuit of happiness to inner reconnection, explaining how shifting mindset, healing the gut, and making conscious, sustainable lifestyle changes transformed her health, energy, and sense of purpose. This episode dives into consumerism, self-awareness, gut health, emotional wellbeing, and practical tools to help you begin your own journey toward intentional, mindful living, one small step at a time. Key Themes Moving from external validation to inner fulfilment Understanding how consumerism and overconsumption affect mental and physical health Reconnecting with the “Wise Sage” self through mindfulness and self-compassion The link between gut health, energy, and emotional wellbeing Making sustainable, toxin-free lifestyle choices without overwhelm Building mental fitness through awareness, curiosity, and self-love Powerful Quotes “Change the way you look at things and the things you look at change.” – Wayne Dyer “We are all wounded healers.” – Gabor Maté “People are fed by the Food Industry, which pays no attention to health, and treated by a Health Industry that pays no attention to food.” – Wendell Berry “It’s easier to fool people than to convince them that they are being fooled.” – Mark Twain “The reasonable man adapts himself to the world; the unreasonable one persists in trying to adapt the world to himself.” – George Bernard Shaw “Every view is the wrong view if it is held as the only view.” – Thich Nhat Hanh “The very reason I write is so that I might not sleepwalk through my entire life.” – Zadie Smith “I can’t see a way through,” said the boy. “Can you see your next step?” asked the horse. “Yes.” “Then just take that.” – Charles Mackesy The Boy, The Mole, The Fox and The Horse   Recommendations & Resources Apps: YUKA App – Scan food and cosmetic barcodes to check for health impact and hidden additives. Documentaries: The Gut: Our Second Brain (2013/2014); How our gut microbiome influences mood, energy, and immunity. Fed Up (2014) – The truth about sugar, processed foods, and how the food industry shapes our health. Books: Activate Your Vagus Nerve by Navaz Habib; Learn how to restore calm, resilience, and optimal health through vagal tone. Other Mentions: Dirty Dozen List; Environmental Working Group’s (EWG) guide to fruits and vegetables with the highest pesticide residues. https://www.ewg.org/foodnews/dirty-dozen.php Eco-conscious brands like SEEP, Who Gives a Crap, and homemade natural cleaning solutions. https://theseepcompany.com/collections/all https://uk.whogivesacrap.org/pages/about-us Complimentary Therapist https://maresawalsh.ie/   Key Takeaways Awareness is the first step to move from unconscious living to mindful action. Small, consistent changes in what we eat, buy, and consume create long-term wellbeing. Happier people make healthy choices, and healthier choices make happier people Gut health is central to both physical energy and emotional balance. Mindful activism starts with understanding, self-love, curiosity, and compassion. You don’t need to overhaul your life overnight, simply “take one step at a time.” Call to Action If today’s episode resonated with you, take one small conscious action, whether it’s scanning your food labels, switching to natural products, or simply pausing before your next purchase. Subscribe for Part 2 of “From Consumerism to Mindful Activism”, where Patricia explores the hidden costs of overconsumption and shares more inspiring resources for sustainable, conscious living. Want to go deeper? Book a free discovery coaching call to explore how mindful awareness and mental fitness can help you reconnect with your true self.   www.pacoaching.co.uk or email hello@pacoaching.co.uk  

In this week’s episode, Patricia explores the beauty and power of art as healing, human connection, and compassion in action. Following last week’s tribute to inspirational changemakers of the past, today’s story celebrates the people creating positive change right now, those dedicating their time to supporting others and making the world a kinder, more hopeful place. This episode is inspired by Tara Dominick, Artist and co-founder of the Kakuma Art Project, this episode shares my poetic story Through Your Paintings, born from a creative connection that has turned into a continuing inspirational movement of creativity, love, and empathy. The Kakuma Art Project began with one painting, The Boat, which sparked an initiative bringing therapeutic art workshops to refugees in the Kakuma Refugee Camp in Kenya.   Through the lens of creativity, the film (The Good Lie), and the wisdom of thought leaders like Gabor Maté, Elif Shafak, and Jane Goodall, Patricia reflects on how trauma, art, healing and compassion intertwine, and how every small act of kindness can ripple out to change lives.   Key Points Discussed: The Kakuma Art Project’s Origin: How one painting, The Boat, inspired a movement that provides art workshops for refugees in Kenya, and much more. The Power of Connection: The friendship between Tara and Hubert, co-founders of the Kakuma Art Project, and how creativity builds bridges across borders. The Good Lie: Reflections on the 2014 film inspired by true events in Sudan and the Kakuma Refugee Camp, and its deep emotional impact and its continued resonance today. Understanding Trauma: Insights from Gabor Maté on how trauma lives in the body. Creativity can provide a pathway to healing, an inner connection but also human connection. Post-Traumatic Growth: The idea that from deep pain can come love, connection, resilience, creativity, and empathy. Numbness vs. Evil: Elif Shafak’s perspective on how apathy, not evil, may be the true opposite of goodness. The Role of Art in Healing: How painting, writing, and creative expression can help release pain and the power of creating safe emotional spaces. Rising Above Fear: Using awareness, kindness, and self-compassion to move from trauma to empowerment. A Call to Action: Supporting humanitarian initiatives like the Kakuma Art Project — and recognising that every act of kindness matters.   Quotes: “War is what happens when language fails.” – Margaret Atwood “War is itself the enemy of the human race.” – Howard Zinn “I’m fed up to the ears with old men dreaming up wars for young men to die in.” – George McGovern “Trauma is not what happens to us, it is what happens inside of us as a result of what happened to us.” – Gabor Maté “Perhaps the opposite of goodness is numbness.” Elif Shafak “Holding anger and hatred in you is a poison… it eats you up from inside.” “What you do makes a difference, and you have to decide what kind of difference you wish to make.” – Jane Goodall   Key Takeaway: Art can be a bridge between pain and peace. Through compassion, creativity, and awareness, we can all play a part, however small, in bringing light to those living in darkness.   Together, we can help amplify the voices of those whose stories deserve to be heard.   Call to Action: If the Kakuma Art Project resonates with you and you’d like to contribute or learn more, there are lots of options as outlined below, please reach out via the following links;   Donate to Kakama Art Project; https://linktr.ee/Kakumaartproject?utm_source=linktree_profile_share&ltsid=1ea5d87f-a981-44f0-8967-c27cdc44de5c Buy the book Power of One Painting available on amazon £12.99 https://amzn.eu/d/bI0dsyK If you are interested in any of the art/paintings reach out to Tara Dominick email info@taradominick.com Website https://www.taradominickartist.com/ Submit your own piece of creativity to the fundraising online gallery on Kakuma Artline Grids https://kakumaartproject.com/ - your paintings, music, photography, favourite tree, your pet etc. £27 per submission Buy the book; Creative Souls; Poetry. Music Art Compilation - which is supporting the Kakuma Art Project fundraising https://amzn.eu/d/3LdaRxh £16.99   “Kindness is contagious.” Yours is much appreciated. Thank You   Connect with Patrica via email hello@pacoaching.co.uk Linktree: https://linktr.ee/pacoaching.co.uk    

How Inspirational Quotes Shaped My Life In this powerful and poetic episode, Patricia reflects on the transformative power of inspirational quotes and the legacy of the great minds who spoke them. "Ode to the Greats" is a heartfelt tribute to legendary change-makers like Martin Luther King Jr., Nelson Mandela, Maya Angelou, Benjamin Zephaniah, and others whose words still spark action, self-love, resilience, and post-traumatic growth. From teenage diary entries filled with motivational clippings to a “Words of Wisdom” box shared with her mother during lockdown, the journey of self-discovery is steeped in wisdom, emotional intelligence, mental fitness, and the power of the pause. This episode is more than gratitude, it’s a call to awaken, to step into your legacy with courage, to feed light instead of the dark, to move with love instead of fear, and to let inspiring words guide your healing, justice-seeking, and soulful action. Discussed in this episode: Resilience Building with Mental Fitness Emotional awareness Women's rights and justice Legacy building Emotional intelligence Post-traumatic growth Words of wisdom Power of pause Critical thinking Self Love Journey to inner empowerment Notable Quotes from the Episode: "Let your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears." – Nelson Mandela "Between the stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response." – Viktor Frankl "We are all one. Only egos, beliefs and fears separate us." – Nikola Tesla "Never doubt that a small group of thoughtful, committed citizens can change the world. Indeed, it is the only thing that ever has." – Margaret Mead "Do what you can until you know better. Then when you know better, do better." – Maya Angelou " All men dream; but not equally. Those who dream by night in the dusty recesses of their minds Awake to find that it was vanity; But the dreamers of day are dangerous men. That they may act their dreams with open eyes to make it possible. ." – T.E. Lawrence "A bird sitting on a tree is never afraid of the branch breaking, because its trust is not in the branch but in its wings." "Just don’t give up. Don’t let them grind you down. Rise up all ye sisters and brothers who know better, stand firm in the downturn." – Benjamin Zephaniah POETRY BOOK; Creative Souls – published “Ode To The Greats”, available to buy on Amazon https://amzn.eu/d/f7ZgaQI   Call to Action: Share your favourite inspirational quote with us! Which words have shifted your thinking or shaped your life’s path? Leave a comment below. Subscribe, Rate, and Review If this episode moved you, inspired you, or gave you pause, please subscribe, leave a 5-star review, and share it with someone who needs a dose of wisdom and courage today. Join the Conversation Let’s co-create a community that thrives on wisdom, compassion, courage, and legacy. Use the hashtag #OdeToTheGreats If you wish to know more about Mental Fitness and how it can help you email me hello@pacoaching.co.uk  

Reclaim Your Mind in the Age of Digital Distraction Episode Summary In this powerful and thought-provoking episode, we dive into the hidden costs of social media and technology on your mental health, relationships, emotional wellbeing, and even identity. Inspired by the eye-opening docudramas The Social Dilemma and TikTok Boom, Patricia shares a deeply personal reflection on how digital overload is disconnecting us from our humanity. Discover how mindfulness, mental fitness, and positive intelligence can help you reclaim your time, attention, and peace, and why now is the time to take back control before we lose ourselves in the algorithm.   Discussed in this Episode The true psychological and emotional cost of constant digital engagement Why social media addiction is more than just screen time, it’s about manipulation Insights from The Social Dilemma and TikTok Boom How coaching, mindfulness, and emotional intelligence can reconnect us with our wise inner self Practical steps: creating tech-free zones, journaling, and digital detoxing Why building mental fitness is more urgent than ever in the AI age A call to action: How to protect yourself, and future generations, from digital disconnection   Quotable Moments "If you're not paying for the product, you are the product." "Mindfulness doesn’t happen while scrolling, it starts when we step away from the noise." "AI may be smarter, but it will never be wiser than a connected human being."   Key Takeaway Awareness is the first step to transformation and transformation is process of reconnection. When we consciously reduce our digital distractions and prioritise mental fitness, we reclaim our power, our presence, and our peace.   Mentioned in This Episode The Social Dilemma (Netflix) TikTok Boom (Docuseries) 10 Arguments for Deleting Your Social Media – book by Jaron Lanier Super Brain, book by Deepak Chopra & Rudolph E Tanzi Amusing Ourselves to Death – Book by Neil Postman Robert Kiyosaki quote: “Your future is created by what you do today, not tomorrow” Mark Twain “A lie can travel around the world while the truth is still putting on its shoes.” The Age of Surveillance Capitalism, book by Shoshana Zuboff , “the MARKET now trades exclusively in HUMAN FUTURES at scale”   Listen Now & Start Reconnecting Feeling overwhelmed by your devices? Tune in for deeper awareness of potential damage and learn how to cut through the digital noise and reconnect with your true self, before it’s too late, for you and your loved ones.   Connect with Patricia if you want to know more about how Mental Fitness can help you.   Hit the subscribe button for more weekly episodes.   www.pacoaching.co.uk email hello@pacoaching.co.uk  

This episode is powerful and heartfelt, and is all about moving from self-sabotage to self-welcoming with self-care, reclaiming body love and inner wisdom. Today Patricia dives into the inner critic that lives in all of us, the voice that tells us we’re not good enough. But what if it’s not only the world that’s to blame? What if it’s the stories we tell ourselves? Patricia shares a deeply personal journey of body shame, low self-worth, and the lifelong impact of unrealistic beauty standards. From the harsh truths about the media's influence to the importance of self-welcoming over self-improvement, this episode calls on women, and all listeners, to reconnect with their true essence, their "sage" within. Through reflections on culture, parenting, and healing, you'll discover how embracing your natural, authentic self isn’t just liberating, it’s revolutionary.   Concepts Discussed: body positivity overcoming low self-esteem unrealistic beauty standards self-worth and parenting emotional healing women empowerment body image issues makeup-free movement self-acceptance for women sage mindset vs saboteurs generational healing confidence in your own skin   Notable Quotes: “It’s not always the world telling us we’re not good enough. Sometimes, it’s just the stories we tell ourselves from our own perceptions.” “My Mindful Poetic Stories podcast isn’t about self-improvement, it’s about self-welcoming.” “If all women woke up and decided to love their bodies, half the beauty industry would collapse.” “You are loved for your unique miracle self. Now repeat that to yourself.” “Flawless doesn’t exist in nature, so why are we trying to chase it?” “When we come home to ourselves, our world changes for the better”. We live in a society which is very much dependent on roles and roles depend on how other people see you, so we all want to be seen in the best possible light and society punishes us for being authentic Gabor Mate "I don't have ugly ducklings turning into beautiful swans in my stories. I have ugly ducklings turning into confident ducks. Maeve Binchy "We get courage from other people's stories. We get consolation from the way they tell about failures, disappointments and crises. It means that we are not alone." Maeve Binchy   Call to Action - If this episode resonated with you, share it with someone who needs a reminder of their worth. - Follow the podcast and leave a review on your favourite platform—it helps more people join this self-love revolution. - Tag me on Instagram with your favourite takeaway using #MindfulPoeticStoriesPodcast. - Subscribe for weekly reminders to reconnect with your beautifully imperfect self.   www.pacoaching.co.uk or email on hello@pacoaching.co.uk  

In today’s deeply personal episode, Patricia explores the emotional toll of the “pleaser saboteur”, a self-sabotaging behaviour rooted in the fear of rejection, unmet childhood needs, and a relentless desire to be accepted by others. Drawing from both her own transformation journey and a poetic story inspired by the heartbreaking story of a friend’s experience with coercive control, Patricia shares insights into how empathy, when left unchecked, can lead to burnout, emotional manipulation, and the loss of self-identity. In this episode Patricia uncovers: How unconscious saboteur patterns like the pleaser and controller can trap us in unhealthy dynamics. Why self-love is not selfish, but essential, to our wellbeing and happiness. The danger of attachment disguised as love, and how to spot it. Why mental fitness and frameworks like Positive Intelligence help build resilience. How to set boundaries that protect your well-being and still honour your capacity to love. The words of wisdom that run through all of Patricia’s podcast episodes, “You wouldn’t sabotage someone you truly loved. And you wouldn’t self-sabotage if you truly loved yourself.” Join Patricia on a journey from self-abandonment to self-mastery, from self sabotage to self care, with reflections from thought leaders like Gabor Maté, Brené Brown, Carl Jung, and more. Powerful Quotes from the Episode: “You wouldn’t sabotage someone you truly loved. And you wouldn’t self-sabotage if you truly loved yourself.” Patricia Ahern “The power is not in whether we say yes or no; the power is in our conscious capacity to choose.” Patricia Ahern “My love is unconditional. But my presence is not.” “It is not others’ responsibility to think of me; it is my own.” Patricia Ahern “Being in the wrong relationship can be detrimental to your health.” — Gabor Maté “Mastering others is strength. Mastering yourself is true power.” — Lao Tzu “The near enemy of love is attachment.” — Brené Brown “Before you heal someone, ask him if he's willing to give up the things that make him sick.” — Hippocrates “I think the saddest people always try their hardest to make others happy because they know what it feels like to feel absolutely worthless.” — Robin Williams “Empaths fall in love with those destroying them—not out of weakness, but because they are unconsciously seduced by the other’s wounds.” — Carl Jung   References and Mentions: Gabor Maté – Expert in trauma, addiction, and mind-body health Brené Brown – Researcher on vulnerability, shame, and wholehearted living Lao Tzu – Ancient Chinese philosopher Carl Jung – Swiss psychiatrist and psychoanalyst Robin Williams – Quoted on the pain behind people-pleasing Paul Brunson – Relationship coach (conversation with Gabor Maté) Hippocrates – On true healing and personal responsibility Positive Intelligence by Shirzad Chamine – Framework of saboteurs and Sage mindset Serious Crime Act 2015 (UK) – Legal recognition of coercive control as abuse   RECOMMENDED BOOKS - if you are dealing with highly controlling or narcissistic behaviour   Why Does He Do That - by Lundy Bancrofts - inside the minds of angry and controlling men The Empath’s Survival Guide - Life strategies for sensitive people - by Judith Orloff Toxic Magnetism - How and Why Empaths attract Narcissists by Kara Lawrence Will I Ever Be Good Enough? - Healing the Daughters of Narcissistic Mothers by Karyl McBride Maybe You Should Talk To Someone - by Lori Gottlieb Adult Children Of Emotionally Immature Parents - How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting Or Self-Involved Parents by Lindsay Gibson. Daring greatly - How The Courage To Be Vulnerable Transfers The Way We Live, Love Parent and Lead by Brene brown   Takeaway Message: This episode is a heart-centered call to action for empaths, caregivers, and people-pleasers to turn their nurturing inward. Self-love is the foundation from which all healthy relationships are built. The journey may be challenging, but it’s the only one that leads to freedom, wholeness, and authentic connection, with yourself and others. Highlights: Pleaser saboteur Self-sabotage behaviours Coercive control in relationships Empaths and narcissists Mental fitness coaching Positive Intelligence saboteurs Healing childhood wounds Setting emotional boundaries Unmet emotional needs Emotional burnout recovery Self-love and empowerment Narcissistic abuse awareness Emotional manipulation signs Inner child healing Women’s emotional health   www.pacoaching.co.uk connect with me via social media or via my email hello@pacoaching.co.uk  

Podcast Show Notes: Episode 36 Episode Title: My Fridge, The Bigger Picture   Episode Summary In this soul-nourishing episode, we explore the emotional root of cravings, the difference between hunger and emotional eating, and how societal conditioning traps us in cycles of self-sabotage. Patricia shares deeply personal reflections, insights from her coaching practice, and powerful tools to start healing your relationship with food, all through the lens of self-love, compassion, and conscious choice. "We must learn to love ourselves so we self-care, not self-sabotage." Key Takeaways & Themes Cravings vs Hunger: Hunger is a biological need; cravings often stem from emotional longing or unmet needs. Emotional Eating Patterns: Food becomes a "pacifier" to numb discomfort, pain, or stress, leading to cycles of guilt and shame. The Power of the Pause: Creating space between the craving and the action allows us to tune into our "true essence" and choose differently. The Judge Saboteur: Harsh inner criticism perpetuates shame and can drive emotional overeating. Quick Fix Culture: From slimming pills to injections, many chase short-term solutions that ignore root causes, and the potential long term consequences. Hormonal & Biological Factors: Ghrelin, GLP-1, and other hormones play a significant role in hunger regulation, it's not just willpower. Reclaiming Power Through Self-Love: Healing starts by nurturing compassion, joy, and patience within yourself.   Quotes to Remember “Am I hungry? Or am I craving something else right now?” “What felt like comfort was a cycle, an emotional rollercoaster masquerading as relief.” “You are not weak when you binge eat, you're weary.” “Learn to love yourself so you self-care, not self-sabotage.” “Gaunt is not good. Tricking the body into not eating is not healing.” “Eat like you love yourself. Move like you love yourself.” — Jim Kwik “Nothing is more desirable than to be released from an affliction... but nothing is more frightening than to be divested of a crutch.” — James Baldwin “People are fed by the food industry which pays no attention to health, and treated by the health industry which pays no attention to food.” — Wendell Berry “At some point we need to stop just pulling people out of the river, we need to go upstream and find out why they’re falling in.” — Desmond Tutu   Referenced in This Episode GLP-1 Drugs / Slimming Jabs (e.g. Ozempic, Wegovy) Vanessa Feltz Show: Commentary on slimming injections and societal attitudes toward weight Lizzie Cundy: On anorexia recovery and caution about slimming drugs Documentaries on food education (not named but mentioned) Psychologies Magazine – daily affirmations: o “Eat to nourish, not punish” o “Move to the rhythm of your body”   Tools & Practices Shared The Power of the Pause — slowing down before reacting to cravings Daily affirmations to rewire your beliefs around food Self-inquiry prompts like “Am I really hungry?” Listening to your body’s signals over societal conditioning Understanding hormones and how they influence cravings and hunger   ❤️ Final Message You are not alone in your struggle with food, cravings, or emotional eating. The path to healing starts with self-awareness, continues with self-compassion, and is empowered by self-love. This isn’t about perfection. It’s about progress, presence, and patience. “You are not your body, but your body responds to how you treat it. Choose to drive it with love, not fear.”   👉 Join the Self Love Movement — a community focused on healing from the inside out. 📩 To find out more about my work check out my website www.pacoaching.co.uk 🎧 Subscribe & share this episode if it resonated with you!   Hear more about my weight loss and self love journey on my conversation with Martha Rice on her Casting the Net Podcast  https://www.youtube.com/watch?reload=9&v=w04jsaohKQE&feature=youtu.be   www.pacoaching.co.uk, contact me to find out more or to book a free discovery call      

Podcast Series: Self Love to Self Sabotage   Episode Overview In Part 1 of this 2-part deep dive, Patricia shares a deeply personal journey of overcoming emotional eating, food addiction, and a once-toxic relationship with her fridge, which was not just an appliance, but an emotional crutch. From binging to self-awareness, from comfort food to self-love, this episode unpacks the psychological, societal, and biological reasons why we eat when we’re not hungry, and what finally helped Patricia break free. If you’ve ever turned to food for comfort, felt shame after eating, or battled diet culture, this one’s for you. ________________________________________ Key Quotes “You are not weak when you binge eat. You’re weary.” “My fridge wasn’t just an appliance — it was my emotional comfort blanket.” “Happier people make healthier choices.” “Self-love is a revolutionary act.” Abiola Abrahms “I don’t work on my body anymore, I work with my body.” Patricia Ahern There comes a point where we need to stop just pulling people out of the river. We need to go upstream and find out why they’re falling in.” Desmond Tutu “And I said to my body, softly, ‘I want to be your friend.’ It took a long breath and replied, ‘I have been waiting my whole life for this.’” Nayyirah Waheed ________________________________________ Key Topics Emotional eating recovery Comfort eating triggers Treats & sugar dependency Slimming pills vs self-love Diet culture myths The obesity crisis and societal influence Self-love and body image Healing through emotional awareness What You'll Learn Why emotional eating isn’t just about willpower, it’s also about emotional suppression How childhood experiences may create lifelong associations between food and comfort The truth about diet culture, slimming drugs, and marketing manipulation How I shifted from food dependency to nutritional empowerment How I went from numbing to nourishment Why self-love is the foundation of sustainable health and helps us make healthier choices Actionable tips to begin your own healing journey with food and body image Listener Tips Write your WHY – Why do you want to feel better in your body? Connect with your why. Start small – One mini healthy shift a day is enough. Talk to your reflection – Build a positive, kind connection with your body. Use your fridge as motivation, not a crutch – Put reminders or photos that empower you. Remember: willpower is depleted by dependency and addiction. Healing refuels it. Final Thoughts This episode is more than a story about food, it’s about breaking cycles, reclaiming power, and learning how to love yourself from the inside out. If this resonated with you, share it with a friend who needs to hear they’re not alone. Let’s spread the message that healing is possible, and self-love is the real miracle cure. Mentioned in this Episode Mariana Cardore F* The Diet book and podcast - recommended Listen - https://podcasts.apple.com/nz/podcast/how-is-your-mental-fitness-interview-patricia-ahern/id1623052831?i=1000579711827 – Next Week To be continued….. Part 2 – My Fridge: The Bigger Picture – will zoom out and explore the wider landscape of slimming jabs, public health, convenience culture, and how we all got here. Plus: how to build resilience in a world that profits off your self-doubt. Don’t miss it. Call to Action 🎧 Enjoying the podcast? Here’s how you can support: ✨ Subscribe to the podcast for more soulful conversations on emotional well-being and personal transformation. 🌟 Leave a 5-star rating and a written review on Apple or Spotify ✨ Share this episode with someone who needs hope or healing today. 💌 Join the conversation: DM me on Instagram @pacoaching_foryou or email hello@pacoaching.co.uk 💻 Explore Coaching/Mental Fitness: www.pacoaching.co.uk      

Host: Patricia Ahern Theme: Grief, Resilience, Mental Fitness, Self-Healing, Rebirth ________________________________________ 🔥 Episode Summary In this powerful and poetic Part 2 podcast episode, Patricia explores what it means to rise from the ashes of loss, trauma, and emotional pain — just like the mythical phoenix. This is an honest and compassionate reflection on grief, emotional healing, self-reconnection, and building resilience. Through personal stories, the transformative RAIN framework by Tara Brach, and the pain of losing a dear friend to suicide, Patricia takes us on a journey of radical acceptance, inner trust, and mental fitness. If you’ve ever felt the weight of grief, regret, or emotional disconnection — this episode is a heartfelt guide to rising stronger, wiser, and more compassionate. ________________________________________   💬 Memorable Quotes "Time alone doesn’t heal wounds — healing comes from being open to learning and feeling." Patricia Ahern "To heal, we must feel. To rise, we must trust that we can." Patrica Ahern "You can’t get enough of something that almost works." – Dr. Vincent Felitti "The biggest tears at a graveside aren’t for loss — they’re for regret." "Mental fitness is not self-improvement — it’s self-welcoming." Patricia Ahern ________________________________________ RAIN: A Path to Healing and Acceptance Tara Brach’s RAIN framework is a mindfulness tool for processing difficult emotions. Learn more: RAIN Practice by Tara Brach R – Recognize what’s happening A – Allow it to be there I – Investigate with kindness N – Nurture with self-compassion ________________________________________ Resources & Mentions 🔗 Tara Brach’s RAIN Practice 📘 Radical Acceptance & Radical Compassion – by Tara Brach o https://www.tarabrach.com/ 🎓 Amusing Ourselves to Death – by Neil Postman 🧘‍♀️ Brahma Kumaris Meditation & Teachings o https://www.brahmakumaris.com/ 🧠 Positive Intelligence & The Sage Perspective o https://www.positiveintelligence.com/ BACP Therapist Directory https://www.bacp.co.uk/about-us/home/ UKCP Register https://www.psychotherapy.org.uk/about-ukcp/our-register/ Counselling Directory UK https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/ Mental Health Ireland https://www.mentalhealthireland.ie/ MIND https://www.mind.org.uk/ ________________________________________ 📢 Call to Action ✨ Explore therapy or mental health support — your healing matters. 🎧 Enjoying the podcast? Here’s how you can support: ✨ Subscribe to the podcast for more soulful conversations on emotional well-being and personal transformation. 🌟 Leave a 5-star rating and a written review on Apple or Spotify ✨ Share this episode with someone who needs hope or healing today. 💌 Join the conversation: DM me on Instagram @pacoaching_foryou or email hello@pacoaching.co.uk 💻 Explore Coaching/Mental Fitness: www.pacoaching.co.uk   If you’re grieving, struggling with inner pain, or feeling stuck — know that you are not alone. Healing begins with self-awareness, compassion, and connection.   email hello@pacoaching.co.uk website www.pacoaching.co.uk    

In this deeply personal and reflective episode, Patricia shares the first part of a two-part series on rising after loss, with an emphasis on grief, suicide, and emotional healing. Through a vulnerable recounting of her own experience losing a close friend to suicide, Patricia explores how emotional pain, when faced and processed, can lead to profound personal transformation. This episode is a gentle yet powerful reminder that from our darkest moments, we can rise—stronger, wiser, and more compassionate. 💬 "Our darkest times can be our greatest teachers and motivators." ________________________________________ Trigger Warning This episode discusses grief, trauma, and suicide. Please listen only if you feel emotionally safe to do so. Resources for support are included below. ________________________________________ Key Takeaways We Can Rise From Pain Healing is a conscious process, not a passive one. Pain avoided becomes pain prolonged; pain processed becomes transformation. "We may fall or fail, but these experiences define a life—they do not define us." ________________________________________ Grief and Loss Are Unique Journeys Based on the Kübler-Ross 5 Stages of Grief: Denial, Anger, Bargaining, Depression, Acceptance. These are not linear, nor the same for everyone. They are an emotional guide, not a rule. “The brain tries to protect us, but sometimes it traps us in past pain.” ________________________________________ The Power of Meditation and Reconnection Healing began through meditation at the Brahma Kumaris World Spiritual University. Introduced the concept of a “diamond within”—our inner light muddied by life’s burdens. Brahma Kumaris UK https://www.brahmakumaris.com/ ________________________________________ Positive Intelligence & Mental Fitness Positive Intelligence (PQ) teaches us to recognize Saboteur voices vs. the inner Sage (the diamond). The Saboteurs see everything as bad and it will never be good. The Sage sees challenges and even our darkest moments with a gift or opportunity within. “The question: Which is true? The answer: Whatever you believe is true—for you.” Positive Intelligence by Shirzad Chamine https://www.positiveintelligence.com/ ________________________________________ Suicide Prevention & Awareness Honouring Patricia’s friend’s memory, she shares some charities she supports for suicide prevention: Charities Mentioned: 🇮🇪 HUGG Ireland – Support after suicide loss 🔗 https://hugg.ie/about-us/ 🇮🇪 Pieta House – Suicide and self-harm prevention 🔗 https://www.pieta.ie/about/ 🇬🇧 Silence of Suicide (SOS) – Breaking stigma around suicide 🔗 https://sossilenceofsuicide.org/about-us/ 🌻 The OLLIE Foundation – Youth suicide prevention 🔗 https://theolliefoundation.org/ ________________________________________ Mental Health Insight: Post-Traumatic Growth 2023 Collective Trauma Conference Patricia first heard the phrase Post Traumatic Growth The concept that growth can follow trauma—emotionally, spiritually, even socially. "Not just healing—but rising. That’s what post-traumatic growth means." ________________________________________ Quote Spotlight “Trauma is not what happens to us, but what happens inside us as a result of what happens to us.” – Dr. Gabor Maté “Everyone you meet is fighting a battle you know nothing about. Be kind. Always.” – Robin Williams ________________________________________ Support Resources BACP Therapist Directory https://www.bacp.co.uk/about-us/home/ UKCP Register https://www.psychotherapy.org.uk/about-ukcp/our-register/ Counselling Directory UK https://www.counselling-directory.org.uk/ Mental Health Ireland https://www.mentalhealthireland.ie/ MIND https://www.mind.org.uk/ ________________________________________ Closing Reflection This episode is a tribute to those lost too soon, we remember you and we rise in your name, and also a reminder to anyone struggling: you are not alone. You can heal. You can rise. ________________________________________ Next Episode Teaser: Part 2 In the next episode, we’ll dive into: Recognising self-sabotage patterns from pain The power of engaging and reconnecting with your Sage within Tara Brach’s RAIN Method for emotional healing   🎧 Enjoying the podcast? Here’s how you can support: ✅ Subscribe so you never miss an episode 🌟 Leave a 5-star rating and a written review on Apple or Spotify 📲 Share this episode with someone who might benefit 💌 Join the conversation: DM me on Instagram @pacoaching_foryou or email hello@pacoaching.co.uk 💻 Explore Coaching/Mental Fitness: www.pacoaching.co.uk