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© 2025 INSTANT EXPERTS - the latest news, explained by idiots
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A comedy podcast featuring all the week's news - explained by idiots.
Hosted by The Honk & Henry Lee -- it's the stuff you wanna know, from guys who don't know it. The final insult? They're Australian.
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38 Episodes
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Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: 1. Trump links Tylenol to autism - Doctors link RFK Jr to aneurism 2. Trump assures all United Nations: “ICE has a jailcell for every Wetback here!” 3. Border Czar Tom Homan rounds up $50,000 and detains it in his pocket 4. And, Henry enjoys The Middle Age Payrise for one glorious minute Plus so much ...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: President congratulates Jimmy Kimmel on 22 hit years - "Guards, seize him!!"FBI Boss Kash Patel can't find own arse - "Right after I got it handed to me by Congress, too!"Robert Redford's passing met with outpour of grief, fluids - "Gee his acting hit my spot!" says every woman born between 1935 and 2007Plus more of the worst week in world history since last week: FBI cyber expert William Shakespeare ce...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Stroke victim, stroke lover Donald J Trump denies signing Epstein Birthday Book - “It must've been the Autopen!”Charlie Kirk shot dead in Utah - Second Amendment 1, First Amendment 0Russia downplays sending drones into Poland - "When have we EVER invaded Poland, apart from 981, 1013, 1017, 1018, 1022, 1030-31, 1065-69, 1076-77, 1092, 1120-1125, 1142-3, 1163, 1182-83, 1192, 1507-8, 1512-1522, 1534-1537, 1561-1...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Chairman Dan defends Beijing trip - “It’s in the national interest! Of China"Rep Marjorie Taylor Greene tries flattery to get Files released - "Every American wants to read your biography, Mr President" Trump scotches rumours - "I'm only dead on the inside"And in sport Henry magically halves winnings at Morning Star Hotel!Plus so much more of the week's hellscape: Ex NSW Premier Bob Carr defends ow...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Taylor & Travis: So Happy! - Every other longtime BF on earth: so f*cked!Aussie PM boots Iran Ambassador over local terror attacks - 'I knew he was trouble when he walked in!'Anti-Hero Vice Prostate BJ Vance tells Ukraine, Crimea - 'You are never ever getting back together!' Plus, a Cruel Summer for Wests Tigers fans as team bombs finals chances again - 'We remember this all too well!' &...
Send us a text here! In this week’s tour of the world’s Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Trump leaves Alaska empty-handed - ARE HIS HANDS JUST TOO TINY?Ghislaine Maxwell on Epstein: “There's nothing to see here” - AND WHO COULD DOUBT A SEX TRAFFICKER?California Gov. Gavin Newsom Trumps Trump in Trumpanese - ALL HIS TROLLING IN UPPERCASE & EXCLAMATION MARKS IS SO UN-PRESIDENTIAL!!!Plus, once in our lifetime, Wests Tigers CANNOT WIN THE WOODEN SPOON! And so much more of the week that dragged u...
Send us a text here! "Hiatuses are for P*ssies!", said our great current President (not really, he only uses words he invented, like 'equalise' and 'grocery'). Still, like a woketard Smithsonian exhibit showing slavery actually happened, our hiatus this weekend is cancelled on account of the sheer number of Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons invading our inboxes from all over the world. Join hosts Henry Lee & The Honk in this special mini-ep as they run down all the 'expertise'*^ to look forward...
Send us a text here! In this week’s tour of the world’s Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Don and Vlad anchor down in Anchorage - and a Peace Prize, BJ and TACO are on the menu!JD Vance Ushas more water into Ohio River - while Erik the Viking pines in Nagorno-Karabakh, Azerbaijan!It's Marjorie Taylor Greene v Laura Loomer for the Women's Borderline Personality Disorder Title - proudly sponsored by Arby's Beef Sandwiches*! (*Inner West Karen offended by the hegemony at a taxonomical level)Plus, Die...
Send us a text here! In this week’s tour of the world’s Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Trump sh*ts pants then sh**ts messenger after dud US Jobs Report - Even BJ Vance's b-jobs are going down!Danish zoo shocks world by feeding pets to its carnivores - The Asiatic Lion loves eating dog, The European Lynx loves eating pussy!Aussie state of Tasmania on a knife's edge after 12th election this week. Who will be Premier? Who'll win the meat tray? Will Harold be right for the Zumba Grand Final? Inner ...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Hulk Hogan is dead. But don’t count him out just yet! Jeffrey Epstein is dead. But like The Hulkster he’s coming back! And Trump's going down like The Iron Sheik, Andre the Giant & Macho Man Randy Savage!Sydney Sweeney comes off the top rope in her great jeans! But so does Inner West Karen - and no-one's ever kicked out of her Being Offended! And so much more total f*cking lunacy!: Gaza - Both sides...
Send us a text here! In this week’s tour of the world’s Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Coldplaygate CEO Andy Byron updates Astronomer's HR Policy - 2-Way Office A*al is in! Trump covers up Epstein Files like he covers up his doodles - with his signature"Obama faked Russian interference in 2016 election" says Trump, from Russia, in RussianPlus, Wests Tigers go viral as NRL incompetence becomes contagious! And so much more crazy sh*t!: Donald Trump Jr tweets - it doesn't go wellDonald...
Send us a text here! In this week’s tour of the world’s Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons Who Are All 100% Innocent: Australia finally gets a world-class crook, f*ckwit & moron all its own - Mark Latham, take a huge bow! (but on yourself, thanks)The Epstein Files just keep on giving if only they existed which they DO NOT!Grandpa Trump thinks he won the FIFA Club World CupPlus, the Aussie Cricket Team runs wild in Jamaica as Jackie Mason fails again. Could Pam Blondi be the answer at the t...
Send us a text here! In this week's tour of the world's Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons not on The Jeffrey Epstein Client List which doesn't exist, ok?: The Poison Mushroom Murder Verdict - What if it was The Patriarchy all along?The Texas Floods Disaster - Kids died but we saved money, Sen. Ted Cruz (R-TX) had a weekend of Greek, plus the word 'BLAME' IS FOR LOSERS!The Jeffrey Epstein Files - Do not exist, they never did, don't f....g push it ok?Plus, Red Bull sacks Christian Horner! - 'Drive to...
Send us a text here! In this week’s tour of the world’s Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Diddy Do It, or Diddy Not? Our long-awaited verdict on the Puff Daddy TrialAustralia's Poison Mushroom Murder Case - Still no word from Prosecutors after plea deal lunch at accused's placeJeff Bezos' One-Click Wedding! - Please no naked flame near Lauren SanchezOrigin III: Decider! Can Hornsby Hornbags finally beat the Gold Coast DDs?Plus, finally, The Breeding Habits of the Sundarbans - A Heron Will Ri...
Send us a text here! In this week’s tour of the world’s Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Trump drops the F-Bomb, and finally - if briefly - makes sense The Honk proposes Middle East Peace, the WWE way In Sport - it's The Attack of the Killer LunchboxPlus TRUMP'S REVIEW OF INSTANT EXPERTS!And so much more! - NATO's 'Mad' Rutte's Daddy fetish! Inner West Karen: back to put the "She" in Beersheba! Just cos Trump never made peace don't mean he don't get no Nobel Peace Prize! Somehow, ...
Send us a text here! In this week’s tour of the world’s Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Your Place or Mine? Israel, Iran trade sleepovers as the love affair continuesTrump’s Birthday Parade Fizzles - To Rapturous Applause'Save the Illegal Immigrants!' - Who I deported (Also Trump)And so very much more! Like Henry at Lord’s for the cricket with Mick Jagger, The Williams of Orange and Our Episode Special Guest MAYE MUSK! (Elon's mum, but careful she's sensitive about it). Plus guns in Minnesota se...
Send us a text here! In this week’s tour of the world’s Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Straight Intta Compton! ICE raids L.A. - And turns a whiter shade of paleIsrael and Iran's Explosive Love Affair Continues - Will they finally get a room?Music legend Sly Stone takes his bat, his ball & Brian Wilson back to the Everlasting PavilionAnd so much more! Like the hairy-headed gent, who ran amok in Kent; the sports coach sacked for winning, and a short history of California (hint: it's in Spanis...
Send us a text here! Live from Lord's cricket ground in London - *We're* the Crooks, F*ckwits & Morons, as we explain our next episode won't be out this Saturday Aussie time as normal, but rather at the special new time of Sunday (Australian Eastern Standard Time). Everything else will be the same: the mistakes, the apologies for last week's mistakes, the appalling language, the recurring characters desperately shoehorned back in, and as ever, the closing audio pieces of specious relevanc...
Send us a text here! In this week’s tour of the world’s Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Freedom Fighter Vlod skewers commie thug Vlad right in the Urethral Meatus!Urethral Meatus Musk skewers commie stooge Trump right in the pork barrel!Moronic Marjorie Taylor Greene declares war on rival vegetables! Cricket-Loving Henry Lee turns scalper as other fans' dreams turns to Ashes!Plus Getting through US airport immigration - The tips you cannot afford to hear; The inside scoop on Mead; and The r...
Send us a text here! In this week’s tour of the world’s Crooks, F*ckwits and Morons: Coalition coalesces after a week of frantic self-discovery by Nats and LibsUS House Republicans pass signature bills “Lock up the Chicos”, “Would You Like A Pardon With That?” and “Death to the Poor!”Aussie maths genius Terence Tao in shock cage match with Henry VII and WWE's Rhea RipleyAnd so much more! Including The Pope’s narrow escape, The Honk’s excellent Melbourne adventure, yet another heartfelt voicem...
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