Blended

Trigger Warning: This episode contains discussions around coercive and post separation abuse.In this episode of Blended, Kate Ferdinand and Cilla are joined by Jess, known online as @JessRunsForSurvivors. Jess creates content around co-parenting with someone with narcissistic traits and is a patron for the charity Mums in Need, which supports women facing post separation abuse and coercive control.Jess shares part of her own story and what life has been like navigating co parenting with someone displaying narcissistic behaviours. She explains the complexity around narcissism as a disorder, why it requires clinical diagnosis, and why obtaining that diagnosis is often difficult.The panel then tackles two difficult listener dilemmas.In the first, a stepmum is worried that her stepdaughter’s behaviour dramatically shifts after time spent at her dad’s house. The child returns hostile towards her stepsister and stepdad, repeating phrases that feel planted. The stepmum fears the dynamic is slowly destabilising her home and does not know how to protect her family without escalating the situation.In the second dilemma, a woman describes how her ex presents as charming and composed publicly, yet attempts to undermine her behind the scenes. He has contacted her workplace claiming concern about her mental health and continues to interfere in subtle but damaging ways. Kate and Cilla admit they find parts of these stories difficult to comprehend, questioning how anyone copes with this level of manipulation. Jess offers practical tools and strategies including grey rocking, tightening communication, regulating tone, and even using tools like AI to draft neutral responses in high conflict situations. For more support follow @jessrunsforsurvivors and check out Mums In Need Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Mother’s Day has always meant something special to Blended. Please Note: This episode was recorded on Thursday 26th February, before the recent conflict in the Middle East. As mums and as a podcast that talks about family life, our hearts are with everyone affected by the devastating events that have unfolded since this recording. This episode is the first ever remote recording of Blended, Kate recorded from Dubai on while Nathalie and Cilla joined from London.After putting a question box out to the Blended Instagram, the messages flooded in. One major theme was the pressure around buying gifts for the ex. Several stepmums shared that their partner expects them to organise Mother’s Day cards and presents for the bio mum, sometimes even extravagant ones. The panel discusses boundaries, emotional labour and whether managing that relationship is really the stepmum’s responsibility.They also tackle the complex dynamic of stepping into a family where the children’s mum has passed away. What happens when you are doing the daily parenting but feel you cannot be publicly celebrated in case it upsets extended family? Kate shares her own experience and how she has navigated that delicate balance.Alongside the dilemmas, the ladies open up about how they will be spending Mother’s Day themselves and why this date continues to matter so much to the show. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

 One stepmum feels ignored in her concerns. Another feels invisible in her relationship. This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand and Nathalie are joined by therapist, bestselling author, TV presenter and podcast host Anna Williamson for an honest conversation about child anxiety and what happens to intimacy when life changes overnight.Anna speaks openly about her own mental health journey and why it led her to her training as a therapist and write the books she has. Her perspective shapes two powerful listener dilemmas.In the first, a stepmum believes she can see clear signs of anxiety in her stepdaughter. She notices changes in behaviour, emotional withdrawal and subtle warning signs, but her partner insists she is projecting. Is she overstepping or is she the only adult paying attention? Anna breaks down what anxiety can really look like in children, the role phones and social media may play and how to raise concerns without damaging your relationship.In the second dilemma, a stepmum admits her relationship has completely changed since the children moved in full time. What used to be spontaneous and passionate now feels interrupted and distant. She jokes that the kids have a spidy sense for knowing exactly when she and her partner are about to get it on. The panel discuss how blended life can quietly erode intimacy, why resentment builds and practical ways to protect your relationship when parenting takes over.Don’t forget to rate and review, also we love hearing from you so follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

When you choose to stay after an affair but the affair created a child, what does moving forward really look like?This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and Cilla to unpack two deeply emotional dilemmas about families that didn’t break apart but were permanently changed.In the first, a wife shares how she and her husband worked through his infidelity but now there is a child from the affair. At a recent BBQ she felt embarrassed, exposed and emotionally overwhelmed. She never imagined becoming a stepmum this way, yet her husband wants everyone to come together as one family. In the second dilemma, the extended family invites the Love child’s mother to gatherings. The panel reacts strongly as they discuss boundaries, respect and whether forgiveness of a partner automatically means full acceptance of everything that came from the betrayal.Kate admits she finds this one hard. She and Cilla debate what forgiveness really means in practice and can you truly separate an innocent child from the pain attached to how they arrived? Nathalie questions whether forgiving without consequence risks repeating the cycle.This episode is honest, emotional and challenging because sometimes healing isn’t about leaving, It's about learning how to live with what happened.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Kate Ferdinand is joined by Cilla and special guest co-host Chuckie Online, presenter, DJ and podcast host, for a powerful conversation from the perspective we don’t hear often enough, the stepson.Chucky opens up about growing up with both a loving dad and a loving stepdad, and how their dynamic shaped him. He reflects on the unique balance between his mum, his dad and his stepdad, and how he never even realised he was in a blended family because it simply felt normal. He also shares the emotional impact of losing his stepdad and how the family navigated that grief together.The episode then turns to a listener dilemma. A mum is terrified that tension between her teenage son and her husband is escalating. Her son is taller now, more defiant, and when her husband raises his voice at her, her son steps in, chest puffed and ready to fight. She fears that if things ever turn physical, there will be no coming back from it.Together, Kate, Cilla and Chuckie discuss boundaries, communication, male ego, teenage triggers and the absolute line that cannot be crossed. They unpack what teenage boys are really reacting to, how past experiences can heighten protective instincts, and why protecting the relationship before it reaches breaking point is critical.An honest, emotional episode about loyalty, respect and what happens when power struggles threaten family stability.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Stepparenting isn’t always easy and sometimes admitting that feels like the hardest part.Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie Holmes-Lewis and special guest co host, broadcaster and podcast host Zoe Hardman, for a raw and honest conversation about stepparenting, boundaries, and relationships that don’t always come naturally.Zoe shares her own experience of building a bond with her stepdaughter, before the panel tackles two listener dilemmas. In the first, a stepmum is at breaking point as her teenage stepdaughter repeatedly ignores house rules, inviting boys over, swearing and answering back, leaving her torn about whether she can stay in the relationship. In the second, a stepmum admits she dreads spending time with her stepdaughter altogether, and the ladies question whether her struggle is really about the child or unresolved tension with the child’s mum that may be affecting the relationship.They also discuss the pressure stepparents feel to get it right, the reality that you don’t always like your children or stepchildren and why step relationships can feel especially fragile when they can be lost at any moment.Don’t forget to rate and review, also we love hearing from you so follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Season 5 starts here and a lot has changed while we were away.After some time off, Kate Ferdinand returns with Nathalie and Cilla for a long overdue catch-up. This episode opens the new season with honesty and reflection, as the ladies share where life has taken them, both individually and as families.There have been big changes, difficult moments, and journeys none of them expected. Nathalie opens up about navigating a major health experience and finding her way through recovery, Kate reflects on a huge family move and what it’s really like being separated from loved ones, and Cilla shares how life has shifted after becoming a mum again following a challenging birth.It’s raw, emotional and reflective, a reminder of how quickly family life can change, and how much resilience it takes to keep going.Don’t forget rate and review, also we love hearing from you so follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

In this Christmas special of Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and Cilla as they come together for a festive catch-up, they’re excited to be back in the studio and keen to give listeners a special episode ahead of the new season next year.They dive into what is often the most complicated and emotionally time of year for blended families, tackling three festive dilemmas sent in by listeners. From an ex crossing the line during Christmas pick-ups, to the quiet pressure and comparison around money and gifts, to a woman struggling with the reality that her partner will be spending Christmas with his ex and children.Alongside the dilemmas, the ladies also talk about how they’ll be celebrating over the festive period themselves. Cilla confesses something she’s never actually done at Christmas before, Nathalie shares why she’s celebrates a little differently and Kate talks about who she’ll be spending Christmas with and how a busy life shapes those decisions.This episode is about boundaries, expectations and knowing when to protect your peace, even during the most emotional time of the year. The ladies don’t sugar-coat it, offering honesty, empathy and at times, tough love.  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and Cilla to unpack a dilemma that challenges the unspoken expectations of blended families.A woman writes in about her relationship with a man who has children from a previous partner. When they first got together, he was happy to keep things separate, no pressure to step into a parenting role, and that suited her perfectly. But now, his family have started making comments, and he’s beginning to change his mind. Suddenly, the idea of becoming a stepmum feels less like a choice and more like an expectation.The panel really respect her honesty, she laid out her boundaries from the start but they question whether being with someone who has kids means you have to take on the stepparent role eventually. Cilla argues that while you might start off playing the aunty or the cool friend, that approach doesn’t work long-term especially if you live together. The aim, she says, should be to grow.Not everyone agrees. Kate and Nathalie discuss the emotional pressure women often face to "mother" in blended dynamics, and the fine line between respecting someone’s boundaries and avoiding the impact on the children involved. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-host Nathalie and TV and radio presenter Snoochie Shy for a powerful conversation about big life moments, loyalty, and how blended family dynamics can make emotional decisions even harder. Snoochie brings a unique perspective, not as a parent but as someone who grew up with a stepdad she’s incredibly close to. Together, the panel dive into two dilemmas from listeners trying to balance love and loyalty. In the first, a woman wants her stepdad to walk her down the aisle, but worries it will offend her biological father. In the second, a listener wants both her mum and stepmum in the room when she gives birth but fears her mum won’t take it well. Nathalie doesn’t think anyone should put pressure on someone else’s feelings, while Kate understands why it might still hurt there are moments you naturally dream of sharing with your child. Snoochie reminds us that communication is everything, and that your wishes matter just as much as anyone else’s. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Cilla and Nathalie to unpack a dilemma that’s left one stepmum torn between her child and her parents.She writes in devastated that since having a baby with her partner, her parents have changed, they only want to look after their biological grandchild and have completely pulled away from her stepson. Before the baby arrived, they treated him like their own. Now, she’s heartbroken and questioning whether she ever imagined having to set boundaries with her own family.Kate doesn't agree, saying that all children deserve to feel included and that if your family won’t treat them equally, it’s your job to protect the child. But Cilla challenges that view, arguing that while you may choose a blended family, others in your life aren’t always obliged to be on board even if it hurts.Together, they explore a painful but important question: where do you draw the line when it’s your own parents showing bias? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and her husband Rio Ferdinand, as they tackle a dilemma that a stepmum writes in concerned that her partner is a loving, present father to their child but wasn’t like that with his older children. She worries about the difference in how he shows up, and how that might affect the kids.The group get real about what happens when parents evolve. Rio opens up about being in a different stage of life now more present and admits that in the past, he put family on the back burner while focused on his football career. It’s an honest reflection on how age, maturity, and life circumstances can shape how someone parents.They also revisit a dilemma from a previous episode that Rio joined for a few minutes to discuss but didn’t get to break it down, a dad who is taking in his biological daughter but allowing his stepdaughter to go into care. They discuss whether biology should ever be the dividing line, and what it really means to show up for a child. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and Cilla to unpack a dilemma that touches on family loyalty, jealousy, and boundaries.A stepmum writes in upset that her partner’s mum still has a close relationship with his ex. They spend time together, but she and her mother-in-law have no relationship at all. She admits it makes her feel jealous, insecure, and even a little pushed out of the family.Kate argues that this is a normal reaction most people would feel the same sting but stresses that it’s important to recognise the feeling without acting on it. Cilla takes a tougher stance, saying it’s none of the stepmum’s business as long as her partner’s mum has a good relationship with her son and grandchildren.The panel explores the wider questions: What happens when loyalties blur across old and new relationships? Is it natural to feel jealous, or does jealousy create bigger problems? And how do you navigate in-laws who still keep one foot in the past? Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand and Nathalie are joined by special guest co-host, presenter and dad Rickie Haywood-Williams. Together, they tackle the dilemma of a mum whose biological son lives with his dad, while she lives with her partner, stepdaughter and their new baby. She admits she never thought she wouldn’t live with her biological child, and now she worries she can feel him pulling away as she builds a family under a different roof.For Rickie, this hits really close to home. His oldest daughter is from a previous relationship, and now he lives with his stepdaughter and young son. He talks honestly about how he navigated that shift with his daughter, stressing how important it is to keep expressing love, carving out time just for them, and staying consistent even when teenagers seem distant. Sometimes, he says, it’s just about sending that text or making that call even if it doesn’t get a reply.Kate reflects on her own household, where the little ones are desperate to see the older kids. Nathalie channels her inner Cilla and reminds everyone that different households can have different rules, and that’s okay what matters most is the connection and the love.The panel also debate the role of phones. Rickie shares that if he could go back, he’d have restricted phones for longer, because while they help kids stay in touch across households, they can also pull children into isolation and take away valuable family time. The group talk about guilt, balance, and how to make sure your children feel seen and loved no matter where they call home.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Nathalie and Cilla to unpack a heartbreaking dilemma.A mum writes in devastated after her partner refused to take in his daughter’s older sister meaning she may end up in care. She’s torn apart, not just for the child, but also because she fears what it says about her partner. If he can turn his back on his daughter’s sibling, could he one day do the same to her son?The ladies feel very strongly that siblings should not be split up and urge the mum to fight for the girl to live with them. Cilla and Nathalie share their anger at how a child could be left behind, while Kate calls Rio to join the show to get a male perspective. Rio insists he wouldn’t let a child go into care but he’s also brutally honest that a lot of men might, when faced with financial pressure or the question of biology.Together they explore whether “not my child” is ever a fair excuse, the painful reality of how easy some people can separate siblings, and what responsibility really looks like in blended families.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand and Nathalie are joined by Jessica May, the influencer known for her cleaning hacks, parenting advice, and unfiltered honesty. Jessica opens up about one of the worst times of her life: discovering her partner’s betrayal, the devastation that followed, and the painful process of rebuilding not just her life, but her sense of self.She doesn’t sugarcoat a thing dropping raw truths and bombshells that leave the ladies stunned. Nathalie can’t hide her frustration at the injustice Jess has faced, while Kate is in awe of the grace and strength she’s found through it all. At the heart of her story? One focus: making sure her daughters are happy, no matter what.Together, they tackle a dilemma from a mum whose ex and his new partner keep trying to control what happens in her home. Where’s the line between co-parenting and overstepping? The ladies don’t hold back, debating how to set boundaries, when to push back, and what healthy co-parenting really looks like.And when the conversation turns to discipline, the panel is split: Kate believes stepparents should be able to tell a child off if they live with and care for them while Jessica is clear she wouldn’t want anyone but dad stepping in with her girls.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by co-hosts Cilla and Nathalie to tackle a dilemma that cuts to the heart of step-parenting. A listener writes in about her stepson, who she’s helped raise for almost a decade after his biological mum wasn’t around. For years, she’s been the one doing the school runs, bedtime routines, and being “mum” in every way that mattered.But now his biological mum has reappeared and everything has shifted. Her stepson’s behaviour has changed, and suddenly the stepmum feels like she’s being pushed out of a role she’s built her life around.The ladies explore the painful truth many stepparents face: the sense that, no matter how much love and care you give, you can still be sidelined when a biological parent decides to step back in. They discuss the emotions at play from a mum’s possible shame for not being there, to a child’s natural pull towards wanting that maternal bond, to the stepmum’s fear of being discarded after years of sacrifice.Kate and Nathalie debate whether the stepmum should hold firm in her place as the one who’s raised him, or whether blended families sometimes have to weather these painful shifts. They also talk about how to stop resentment building, the importance of reassurance for both the child and the step-parent, and why blended families need to be ready for these moments of sudden change.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

 This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand is joined by Nathalie and special guest co-host Joel Beya — presenter, founder of Cheeky Sport, and dad — who brings a raw and honest male perspective to the table. Together, they tackle a dilemma from a woman whose partner won’t let her meet his ex. She’s asked, he keeps avoiding it, and now she’s starting to get suspicious.Is this a massive red flag, or just a man not ready to blend the past with the present? Joel is brutally honest about why some men hold back, admitting he’s hurt people in the past simply because he wasn’t ready or serious. Kate says she’d want to meet the ex and build a relationship for the children’s sake but Joel pushes back, arguing it’s not always that simple.The trio debate Is it about protecting boundaries, or avoiding responsibility? and the ladies discuss why women can't settle for mixed signals instead of acting like the prize. Just when things heat up, Joel drops his belief that there’s no such thing as “one true love” — and that doesn’t sit well with Kate or Nathalie.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand, and co-hosts Cilla and Nathalie invite listeners into their group chat — the place where wild dilemmas get sent. Some never make it to the podcast because they're just too outrageous… but today, they’re tackling two viral moments that had people talking.The first? A woman who bought food for her six biological children but not for her stepchild. Her husband asked, but she didn’t see anything wrong with it. The ladies get heated as they unpack whether this is the ultimate “wicked stepmother” behaviour, and question why the dad stood by and let it happen.The second? A stepdad who wasn’t invited to his stepdaughter’s graduation, despite being in her life since she was four months old. Hurt, he decided to cut off financial support. The panel debates whether this was justified or damaging, asking: what role did the mother play, and is this about boundaries or bitterness?Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

This week on Blended, Kate Ferdinand and is joined by co-hosts Nathalie and her husband, Sayce Holmes-Lewis, to unpack a dilemma from a stepmum who feels her partner is still doing a lot for his ex and is starting to wonder if she’s being jealous and petty, or if there’s a real cause for concern.Nathalie believes a man should always be there for the mother of his child but Kate and Sayce disagree they think boundaries are essential, and that being an ex means you don’t get the same privileges as when you were in a relationship. So where is the line?The trio discuss what’s “too far” when it comes to helping an ex, how to keep the focus on the child’s wellbeing, and why clear boundaries protect everyone. Sayce also shares an overlooked male perspective, how moving out of the family home and not seeing your children every day can be an emotional struggle, and why men need to prepare themselves for that shift.Follow @blended on Instagram to share your story. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.