Imagined Paris Podcast

"Can one be on the wrong path when wishing only good things? Can one be on the wrong path wishing no harms on others? Is it enough – wishing and wanting? And which ‘others’ – is there only one? I feel that my questions about the world are no longer fake..."(Read the full text on imaginedparis.com)

"To experience to be accepted without having to perform is to learn how to love others more unconditionally. Oh, to feel so free! I wouldn’t know which came first – the freedom to be myself or being accepted for myself, but the impact on my journey is profound and I am most grateful..."(Read the full text on imaginedparis.com)

"Your river, Paris, she is deep and wide enough for vessels to travel. My heart is deep, and more so in continuous heavy rain, but has it been wide enough for vessels to travel? And is it safe enough for one to stay, especially when it is overflowing?"(Read the full text on imaginedparis.com)

"My little heart, pretending to be big, who gets the hurt from my strong conviction, can handle it. But perhaps I lied when I said my heart didn’t need soothing when I broke it with my rational decision— to break up in December, par exemple — or at least I was confused. Now, after waves of pain, guilt, and even anger, which surprised my heart a little, I know my rational conviction, my principles are what soothe my pain, because they give meaning to it and meaning is as important as life itself, if not more..."(Read the full text on imaginedparis.com)

"Ça va, Paris ?""How have you been in the last few hours? You looked after me so well for the past week that there was not a moment that I didn’t feel loved, and London was so welcoming this morning with its persistent rain, which I welcomed with my persistent smile..."(Read the full text on imaginedparis.com)

"I ran two miles this morning and walked a little along the Seine, spying Notre Dame in the distance with giddiness in my body before picking up mini viennoiseries from the local boulangerie. I am now back in bed, sitting here not feeling blue, spilling my heart to you: Paris, Paris, que je m’en fou!" (Read the full text on imaginedparis.com)

"That’s what I want, Paris – staying close. I’m staying close to you when the rain tiptoes on the skylight window in the morning, when water splashes the porthole of my room like a waving scarf, when I hear my footsteps on the barge floor in the middle of the night, when my breaths speak slowly to my mind, when tears gently cleanse my face…"(Read the full text on imaginedparis.com)

"It’s quiet, Paris. The rain is dancing lightly on the pier and on the deck and I feel as light—ben, it’s just getting heavier all of a sudden—now it’s tiptoeing again—getting heavy again, and back to its lightness – you get the idea. Yet, all the same, it feels quiet in my world...."(Read the full text on imaginedparis.com)

"A bientot, Paris!""I now feel so embraced while embracing all my Parisian phases—the ‘young and abandoned’ Dina, the ‘unhappily-married’ Dina, the ‘reborn and rebellious’ Dina, the ‘single and not on the dating apps’ Dina, the ‘insatiable Londoner girlfriend’ Dina, and the current phase I haven’t got a label for yet..."(Read the full text on imaginedparis.com)

"What a night, Paris!""All the same, I feel such tenderness toward everything and everyone these days—yes, even you—especially you! I feel that I understand them and I want them to feel seen so that in turn they can see themselves, all that good and all the goods. I feel that I understand you and I want you to feel seen so that in turn you can see yourself, all that good and all the goods."Read the full text on imaginedparis.com

"Happy new year, Paris!""And do you know that this is my 21st podcast?"Links to the previous 20 titles, in the order as mentioned in this episode:I (IP27)Right place at the right time (IP34)Fading (IP26)Light, open, touched (Ip32)Unfolding (IP40)I don't miss you, Paris (IP21)Looking at you (IP39)Waves (IP30)Here and everywhere else (IP25)I have nothing, Paris (IP22)Madame est servie! (IP24)Il a neigé (IP36)Chez moi (IP29)I'm not home (IP28)Je vais bien, I think (IP23)It's not about you, Paris (IP31)I had a strange dream (IP35)Reprise (IP38)Si jamais, t'as ton coeur (IP37)Joyeux anniversaire to us! (IP33)Read the full text on imaginedparis.com

"This is where we are, Paris. This is what we’re doing. I have asked for you and thus you exist for me – the you I have imagined so far. One by one, things are revealed to us that bring us closer to the vision—alright, too abstract for you?"(Read the full text on imaginedparis.com)

"I’m looking at you—have you grown with me, Paris? Is that you allowing me to relax about not knowing what I’m going to do, or even where I’m going to live, come the new year? I’m here right now and I’m practicing my art; I’m writing and I’m acting again—I’m acting in Paris again! My daughter can hardly cope with how cool her ibu is! Well, maybe she can, but I still ‘eat’."(Read the full text on imaginedparis.com)

"Bonjour, Paris!""Today I feel free. I have been walking with myself for the last few days and today I walk like someone in love. Little dances that I predicted last week have been translated into something more profound and more aligned with who I am, that is tears of joy...."Read the full text on imaginedparis.com

"I'm still here, Paris....""Broken but intact, I imagine myself walking along the Seine, or some unknown stream, somewhere, with a full-bodied smile from my heart to my face, and perhaps a little dance here and there too. Like someone in love, like someone free, for I'll be one with clarity...."Read the full text on imaginedparis.com

"It snowed, Paris. It snowed in Paris and I’m staying inside my head. I threw away my train ticket back to London last night so I get to spend another day and a half here, mostly to convince myself that Paris is still a good idea...."Read the full text on imaginedparis.com

"I had a strange dream, Paris. All my dreams are strange.""Maybe I’ll still walk in the rain alone, occasionally, for feeling misunderstood. But that’s alright – a falling star would fly back up in a hurry if anyone wished to understand me fully. It’s good to be understood by someone, albeit not fully, and it’s great to never be misunderstood by oneself."(Read the full text on imaginedparis.com)

"You seem so far away with all the paperwork required for my long stay visa. And when there’s any delay in getting any document, you feel even further. But not forgotten – yet. I guess I’m just living in the present more these days – because when there’s still enough water in the tank to flush the toilet, I’m reminded of my existence: I can flush, thus I exist. That, and my casual meditations...."Read the full text on imaginedparis.com

"I’m here, Paris; staring at a blank page with a fatigue after moving from my Wimbledon flat onto a 2-bed boat in Chelsea recently – yeah, really, what did the universe see in me?... ""On the boat I have created a tiny corner with a desk, a red Anglepoise lamp, a few cherished books (three of them my own) and a Freewrite Traveler, where the poet feels so at home for the first time in a very long time and has typed 22 poems in Indonesian and English within three days in preparation for the republishing of my second book published 20 years ago...."Read the full text on imaginedparis.com

"Bonjour, Paris!"I’m doing everything I can to be with you. I’m doing everything I can to be with you without losing myself. In fact, I’m doing everything I can to be with myself, which I found in you, through you. You of all people know how important myself – I meant this journey – is!"Read the whole text on imaginedparis.com