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Getting Free
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Getting Free

Author: International Beit Din

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They left abusive marriages. But under Jewish law, they were still not free.


Getting Free is a six-episode limited series sharing the firsthand stories of five women whose abusive husbands denied them a Jewish divorce, known as a gett, to keep controlling them long after the relationship was over.


A Jewish marriage is not fully dissolved without a religious divorce. When a husband refuses to grant it, a woman becomes an agunah — a “chained woman.” No civil court can free her.


In their own voices, Amit, Julia, Helen, Melissa, and Alla each recount their courtship, marriage, separation, and long fight for freedom. They describe how financial pressure, custody threats, isolation, intimidation, and violence continued even after they left. Some are still not free.


Gett refusal is not a private dispute. It is the continuation of abuse. It affects Jewish women of all ages and denominations worldwide, raising urgent questions about power, faith, and communal responsibility.


Hosted by Rabbanit Leah Sarna and produced by the International Beit Din, Getting Free names the withholding of a gett for what it is: abuse and a violation of Jewish law. It also shows how, with proper support, women in these situations can get free.


To learn more about the series or seek help, visit internationalbeitdin.org/gettingfree.


The women in Getting Free are professionals, mothers, and leaders from diverse Jewish backgrounds and levels of observance.


We do not speak for them.
They speak for themselves.


Because change begins with listening.

3 Episodes
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The women fall in love, or they decide to give a nice guy a chance. But red flags start to pop up. There’s abuse. And the women escape. A normal divorce story would end there, but they’re still trapped. They’re agunot- “chained women.” That’s because their husbands refuse to give them a religious divorce, known as a gett.   The women in Getting Free are professionals, mothers, neighbors, and leaders. This is where their fight for freedom begins.   In This Episode Why withholding a religious divorce (gett) is abuse and a violation of Jewish law What it means to be an agunah — a “chained woman” Why the agunah crisis affects women across denominations and levels of observance How coercive control escalates and what finally pushes women to leave Key Moments [00:04:35]Julia decides to leave her marriage.  [00:08:35] What is a gett? [00:17:25] Red flags begin to appear. [00:21:03] What is coercive control? [00:23:33] The moment they decide to leave. Learn more, access resources, and read the full transcript at https://www.internationalbeitdin.org/gettingfree/.   If you or someone you know is being denied a gett, confidential support is available at https://www.internationalbeitdin.org/get-help/
Meet the five women of Getting Free.  They come from different parts of the United States and different cultures, but they have one thing in common- after escaping miserable marriages, they faced one last impossible hurdle: getting their abusers to agree to a Jewish divorce. It’s time they tell their stories.
Imagine finally escaping a marriage after years of abuse. But there’s one last step- you need your abuser’s permission to get a divorce. That’s the reality for the Jewish women in Getting Free, and countless others around the world. Their husbands use a religious tradition to trap them in marriages that should have ended a long time ago.  But it doesn't have to be this way.  To learn more about this issue, and to help put an end to it, please join the International Beit Din at our conference “Redefining Freedom” on May 21st with the Gruss Program at the NYU School of Law. To learn more and register go to https://www.internationalbeitdin.org/campaign-to-end-iggun/ 
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