Notes for My Nervous System

Not improving it.Not explaining it.Not calming it down so it fits better.Just staying.Most of the time, you move on.You do what works.You keep things okay.And that’s not wrong.But sometimes something doesn’t move with you.A sensation.A hesitation.A quiet “wait”.That’s usually the moment you step over yourself.Not deliberately.Not dramatically.Just fast enough not to feel it.The Soft Return exists for that exact moment.Not to make you braver.Not to give you insight.But to let you notice what happenswhen you don’t step in so quickly to adjust yourself.The Soft Return is a short, body-led journey.Something you move through slowly, over a few days.Reading.Writing.Listening.Feeling.No fixing.No performing.No pushing.If this stayed with you a second longer than you expected, i’ve prepared a guided audio journey for you. You’ll find the audio at the end of the page when you click on the link below.👉 CLICK HERE DARLINGWith devotion Camilla This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sensualinstitute.substack.com

If you’re listening to this and something in you is saying yes,it’s probably not because any of this is new.It’s because something you’ve felt for a long timejust got words.Most of us don’t realise how many choices we’re still makingfrom rules we never consciously chose.We don’t think about the rules.We just live with the consequences.Life works, but it doesn’t quite land.Closeness happens, but it doesn’t really reach.Pleasure shows up, but it slips away.Nothing is obviously wrong.And still, something keeps missing.The Soft Return isn’t about fixing yourself.It’s about seeing what’s been shaping youwithout you noticing.And once you see that, it’s hard to go back to not seeing it.I created The Soft Return as a 7-day, body-led journalfor the moment when you realise you’re tired of managing your lifefrom rules you didn’t choose,and you want to live from something more honest,more intimate,more alive.If this audio stirred something in you,don’t rush past it.And don’t talk yourself out of it.You can explore The Soft Return 👉 HEREYou’ll find more information, FAQ, a free sample including the first chapter, its questions and the guided audio body practice I recorded for you.Sometimes the shift doesn’t come from trying harder.It comes from finally seeing what’s been holding your reins in the background. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sensualinstitute.substack.com

…and still feel something in you shrinking from the inside.A quiet emptiness.A slow dimming.A subtle tightening around the places where warmth should land.People assume love-starved means lacking romance, or intimacy, or closeness.But your body defines love differently.To your nervous system, love is presence.Consistency.Attunement.A rhythm you can trust.And when that rhythm is missing, or unreliable, or only available in small unpredictable doses, the body recalibrates.It stops reaching.It stops asking.It stops expecting to be met.Not because you don’t want love.But because somewhere inside, you learned that wanting meant waiting, and waiting meant pain.So your system found a workaround.It made numbness efficient.It made low-grade longing livable.It taught you how to function on emotional crumbs, calling it independence.But here is something most people never tell you:Being love-starved doesn’t make you unworthy.It makes you adaptive.Your body protected you with withdrawal.Your heart protected you with silence.Your chemistry protected you with minimal production of hope.You survived a drought by lowering your desire for water.And yet the truth quietly remains:you were built for deeper nourishment.Not intensity.Not chaos.Not grand gestures.Just steady warmth.Just consistent presence.Just enough softness that your body remembers what it feels like to be received instead of tolerated.If you feel the tug of thisthat faint ache that says “I want more, but I don’t know how to want it safely”you’re not regressing.You’re thawing.You’re coming back to the part of you that still believes in being held without having to earn it.Slowly.Gently.At the pace your body trusts.And if you want a small doorway into that return, a way to begin meeting the places inside you that stopped expecting nourishment…I created something for you. A 7 day journal called Love starved.And i’m giving you first chapter, its 4 prompts, and an audio guided body practice that help the words land in your nervous system .Free, so you can feel what you’re stepping into before you say yes to anything else.The link is below:Love starved 7 day journal With tenderness,Camilla This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sensualinstitute.substack.com

We get really good at postponing pleasure.We tell ourselves:“When the work is done. When things calm down. When I’m finally on top of everything.”But the list keeps growing.And your nervous system keeps waiting.The truth is, you don’t build capacity for pleasure by waiting until life gets easier.You build it by allowing tiny moments of softness, even in the middle of the mess.This week’s new audio is a short practice called The 90-Second Yes.A micro-dose of pleasure for your nervous system.No prep. No perfect conditions. Just one small place to start.✨ Press play and give your body something it doesn’t have to earn. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sensualinstitute.substack.com

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sensualinstitute.substack.com

There’s a place in you that thinks it has to figure everything out.That clenches around problems like fists around air.That scans, predicts, solves, performs, explains.It’s tired.And it’s sacred.Your mind was never the enemy.It learned to overfunction because safety felt optional.Because the body was overwhelmed, and someone had to steer the ship.But darling, the mind is not a machine.It’s not a courtroom.It’s not a punishment.The mind is a sky.And thoughts?Clouds that pass. Winds that stir. Storms that build and break.You are not your weather.You are the space it moves through.You are awareness, not agenda.So today —Let the thoughts come, and let them go.Do not grip them. Do not chase them. Do not try to solve yourself.Instead, breathe.Feel the sky inside you.And when a thought arises, meet it with kindness.Not correction.Not control.Just presence.You don’t need to fix your mind.You need to listen to it.With softness.With pause.With reverence.Because underneath the noise…is silence.And underneath the silence…is you.You, unhooked from the spell of thought.You, rooted in the breath.You, finally home in your own sky.Come back here, anytime.This space is yours. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sensualinstitute.substack.com

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit sensualinstitute.substack.com