UNVEIL: intuitively unlearning life's bs

I used to think treating myself meant booking a flight or scheduling a massage. Now? I treat myself every single day—and it looks completely different.Last Friday, Nachi and I went live to talk about self-care, and we ended up diving into something I’ve been learning in my 40s: how to treat yourself with intention, not just as a reward.We just came off a 10-day detox (first 3 days vegan, last 7 vegetarian), and honestly, the first 48 hours nearly killed me. I felt like Gollum. But what got me through wasn’t willpower—it was mind over matter and knowing I had accountability. Nachi was doing it with me, and that made all the difference.The real convo though? It’s about how self-care shifts as you move through life. When I was in corporate, self-care was intentional planning—trips, massages, always taking my birthday off because I treated it like a national holiday. Now that I’m out of corporate and more intentional with my time anyway, I treat myself differently. A nap when my body asks for it. Time by the pool with a Kindle. Good food with people I love.For Nachi, it’s buying herself flowers from the farmer’s market and trying new restaurants with her kids. Small things that bring immediate joy.But here’s what really shifted for both of us: we’re thinking about internal self-care too. Our naturopath, Dr. Witherspoon, explained that our kidneys are bearing the burden of how much animal protein we consume. She’s encouraging all her patients to do her 10-day detox annually. Our ancestors ate meat every few days, not at every meal.So now we’re committing to at least one day a week (ideally three…eventually) without animal products. Not because we’re becoming vegan—I love meat, and my body needs animal protein. It’s about balance. It’s about treating my organs kindly while I’m still young enough to make a difference.And it’s about this: treating yourself means having compassion for yourself. I can push hard, but I also need to know my limits. I can take on two medium tasks, one large, one small—not five things a day. Because I need to recharge. I can’t drain myself.The detox also helped me remember foods from growing up—like aguacate (avocado) with just olive oil and vinegar. On a plant-based diet, it became a staple. Now I eat it several times a week because it fills me, it nourishes me, and it’s a small moment of joy.We’re planning to do the detox again after the holidays and before summer. Because those are the times we go HAM, so we’re balancing it out.Listen to this week’s Cafecito Chat to hear Nachi and me get real about self-care, health consciousness, and why the first 48 hours of detox feel like a crime scene. And if you have a question for our next live chat, drop it in the comments.Treat yourself gently. Your kidneys will thank you. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit unveiltounlearn.substack.com

Is AI about to wipe out humanity? 🤖 Not if you stop falling for the script.This week on Cafecito Chats, Damaris and Nachi tackle two questions that have y'all in a CHOKEHOLD: AI apocalypse anxiety and midlife crisis reality.Here's our $0.02:On AI & the Doomsday Narrative:CEOs, politicians, and "whistleblowers" are pushing the exact same message: "AI is dangerous, we need regulation." Damaris asks the question nobody else is asking — follow the money, babe. Turns out, most AI companies aren't profitable, they're burning cash, and regulation is a CONVENIENT way to slow down competition. She's wearing anti-surveillance glasses. She's not losing sleep. And she explains exactly why you shouldn't either but it's your choice.Plus: AI's real carbon footprint (it's #10 on the list, not #1), how she uses AI for actual care plans instead of doomscrolling, and why you're being emotionally manipulated to vote for regulations that protect corporations, not you.On Midlife Crisis:It's not a crisis — it's a wake-up call. Nachi breaks down why your 30s, 40s, and 50s hit different: that's when you realize what society told you to want isn't what YOU actually want. The real question isn't "Why am I having a breakdown?" It's "What friction in my life is telling me I'm out of alignment?"<3<3<3Want more episodes and exclusive content? Subscribe to our substack.Visit us at www.unveiltounlearn.comWe welcome constructive feedback and topic ideas, so please shoot us an email at www.unveiltounlearn.com/contact-us.Thank you for listening! If you enjoy the show please follow, rate, and review. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit unveiltounlearn.substack.com

🎙️ Live from our first Cafecito Chat!Nachi and Damaris dive into a raw, unfiltered conversation sparked by a tweet (and white paper) essentially asking: Why do psychopaths keep ending up as CEOs and politicians? From corporate capitalism’s ruthless filtering system to the charisma that hides emptiness, we break down:✅ The traits that get you promoted (and why they’re repulsive to normal people).✅ How systems reward ruthlessness—and punish ethics.✅ The 9/11 connection: Why Damaris’s personal story ties into this conversation.✅ How to opt out: Building a life (and community) that doesn’t glorify psychopaths.Join us every Friday for a live talk on the topic of the week and to answer your questions. This is a call to unlearn the BS we’ve been fed about leadership, power, and success.Join the conversation on Substack and tell us: Have you seen this play out in your own life?🔗 Links mentioned:• The white paper: Aggression and Violent Behavior• Our Substack: unveiltounlearn.substack.com===================================Want more episodes and exclusive content? Subscribe to our substack.Visit us at www.unveiltounlearn.comWe welcome constructive feedback and topic ideas, so please shoot us an email at www.unveiltounlearn.com/contact-us.Thank you for listening! If you enjoy the show please follow, rate, and review. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit unveiltounlearn.substack.com

What does it actually mean to be a man—especially when the blueprint you inherited was broken?In this episode, Nachi and Damaris sit down with writer and motivational speaker Miguel Angel Castillo Jr. (Big Mike Castle on Substack) for a raw, unfiltered conversation about fatherhood, masculinity, and breaking cycles. Same Dominican background. Same NYC upbringing. Very different path—and Miguel brought all of it.Together we get into:- Growing up with a father who was both deeply loved and deeply flawed—and what that does to you- The tension between fear-based authority and the freedom we give our kids today (and why our kids do not fear us the way we feared our parents)- What it means to be present when nobody modeled that for you- Navigating estrangement and the certainty of Gen Z- Soul contracts—why every complicated parent-child dynamic has a lesson in it- Being spoiled with love, not material things—and building that for the next generation- Why you should never soften your voice or make yourself smaller to be more palatableA conversation that is equal parts real talk, cultural reflection, and healing. Same background, different paths—and everything to learn from both.Find Miguel on Substack: substack.com/@bigmikecastle===================================Want more episodes and exclusive content? Subscribe to our substack.Visit us at www.unveiltounlearn.comWe welcome constructive feedback and topic ideas, so please shoot us an email at www.unveiltounlearn.com/contact-us.Thank you for listening! If you enjoy the show please follow, rate, and review. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit unveiltounlearn.substack.com

In this episode, we sit down with Dhayana Alejandrina to explore what it really means to slow down in a world that rewards constant motion. We unpack the tension between creativity and productivity, the pressure to keep up, and why stillness—though uncomfortable—is often where the most honest work begins.We talk about how social media can distort our sense of progress, the difference between audience and real community, and the importance of creating from alignment instead of urgency. Dhayana also shares how she built intentional creative spaces, including her Creative Writing Hour, and what it looks like to nurture creativity beyond the noise.This conversation is a reminder that you don’t have to rush your process to be relevant—and that patience, presence, and intention are part of the work.Support Dhayana Alejandrina. If this conversation resonated with you, here are a few ways to stay connected and support her work:Join the Creative Writing Hour Community: A space for writers and creatives to connect, reflect, and create together.Pre-order Creative Stillness (Signed Limited Edition):<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3<3Want more episodes and exclusive content? Subscribe to our substack.Visit us at www.unveiltounlearn.comWe welcome constructive feedback and topic ideas, so please shoot us an email at www.unveiltounlearn.com/contact-us.Thank you for listening! If you enjoy the show please follow, rate, and review. This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit unveiltounlearn.substack.com