Adjust Accordionly

Hey folks, Jeff here, with Adjust Accordionly—Episode 18: Polka Yer Eyes Out, tearing through August 24–30, 2025, with more fire than an American flag in the hands of a libertarian! Trump’s flag-burning E.O. smacks down lefties (yes, libertarians are leftists), while his cashless bail ban leaves Chicago’s mayor whining about racism. The FBI and CIA squirm under Russia Hoax probes, and Ashli Babbitt’s honored as the patriot she was. Kristi Noem’s border locks out illegals—zero crossings, anons! HUD goes English-only, and RFK’s nutrition push slaps Big Pharma. This polka’s a MAGA riot, and “While You Still Can’s” synth-charged call, inspired by Fugitive Caesar’s X thread, tells invaders to scram. Subscribe on Substack, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, and keep the Trooster polka pumpin’!Polka Week in Review: August 24 to 30, 2025Polka week in review, August twenty-four to thirty’s news, Trump’s bold fight binds left up tight, let’s a-polka through, From crime’s defeat to borders beat, let’s go one-two-three, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, Adjust Accordionly! Trump and Pirro send JAG to DC, crime’s end in sight, National Guard arms up, liberals squirm in fright, Missouri redraws maps for GOP, Dems’ tricks undone, Baltimore’s next for National Guard, Trump’s law won’t run, Voter ID EO planned, fraud’s end in view, Heather Honey joins DHS, election truth breaks through! Week’s a blast, news moves fast, polka’s got that thing! Trump’s fight’s bold, the lefties fold, let the tubas ring! Hey, flag-burning EO slams radicals, Trump stands tall, Ho, cashless bail’s gone in DC, crime numbers fall, No liberal lies, we’ll keep the beat, our spirit’s always strong, Hey, ho, Adjust Accordionly! Lisa Cook fired Fed Reserve, inflation’s foe takes hit, Illinois loses federal funds, bail reform liberals spit, HUD goes English-only, Heritage hears the call, Classical buildings EO, Trump makes beauty thrall, Walmart squeals over H1-B claims, left’s hype leaves doubt, Bed and Bath skips California, crime and taxes chase ‘em out! Week’s a spark, rips through the dark, polka’s got that flair! MAGA’s rise, no compromise, news fills the air! Week’s a blaze, left’s in a haze, hear the polka roar, From Russia Hoax probes to National Guard, we settle the score! With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, our spirit’s never bound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let headline’s sound be found! Hey, FBI, CIA probed for Russia Hoax lies, Ho, Ashli Babbitt honored, patriot’s truth defies, Another trans school shooting shocks, Trump calls for prayer, RFK’s nutrition push, HHS pulls Big Pharma’s hair, No elite deceit, we’ll keep the beat, our polka’s never wrong, Hey, ho, Adjust Accordionly! Adjust Accordionly!News Headlines Covered: August 24 to 30, 2025* Trump and Pirro Send JAG Attorneys to DC (August 24, 2025) President Trump and US Attorney Jeanine Pirro deploy 20 JAG military attorneys to prosecute civilian crimes in DC, bypassing weak local prosecutors to restore law and order.* Trump Signs Executive Order Targeting Flag Burning (August 24, 2025) President Trump’s executive order directs AG Pam Bondi to prosecute flag desecration cases involving crimes, targeting noncitizens for deportation to protect national pride.* Trump Signs Executive Order Ending Cashless Bail in DC (August 24, 2025) Trump’s executive order ends cashless bail in DC, withholding federal grants from jurisdictions with such policies, leading to no murders in 11 days.* Missouri Redraws US House Map for GOP Advantage (August 24, 2025) Missouri’s governor redraws the US House map to favor Republicans for 2026, countering Democrat gerrymandering tactics.* National Guard Units in DC Carry Firearms (August 24, 2025) National Guard units in DC begin carrying handguns and rifles, escalating Trump’s crime crackdown despite local liberal resistance.* Federal Judge Rules Alina Habba’s US Attorney Appointment Unlawful (August 24, 2025) A federal judge blocks Trump’s appointment of Alina Habba as US attorney for New Jersey, citing legal issues, a setback for loyalist picks.* DOJ Probes Former FBI, CIA Directors in Russia Hoax Case (August 25, 2025) The DOJ, under Trump, probes former FBI and CIA directors, with 24-36 individuals potentially implicated in the Russia Hoax conspiracy, targeting Deep State lies.* Israeli Airstrike Hits Nasser Hospital in Gaza (August 25, 2025) An Israeli airstrike strikes Nasser Hospital in Gaza, killing eight, targeting terrorist infrastructure amid ongoing conflict.* Trump Plans Executive Order Requiring Voter ID (August 25, 2025) Trump announces an executive order to mandate voter ID nationwide, aiming to secure elections against fraud despite Democrat objections.* Veteran Burns Flag Outside White House in Protest (August 25, 2025) Veteran Jay Carey burns an American flag outside the White House to protest Trump’s flag-burning order and is arrested for violating a fire ordinance.* Trump’s DOJ Releases Ghislaine Maxwell Transcripts (August 25, 2025) The DOJ releases Ghislaine Maxwell’s transcripts, clearing Trump of Epstein-related allegations, countering liberal media narratives.* Trump Removes Federal Reserve Governor Lisa Cook (August 26, 2025) Trump fires Federal Reserve Governor Lisa Cook, citing alleged mortgage fraud, challenging the Fed’s refusal to lower rates.* RFK Mandates Nutrition Education in Medical Schools (August 26, 2025) HHS Secretary RFK Jr. mandates nutrition education in medical school curricula to combat chronic disease, challenging Big Pharma’s influence.* Walmart Denies H1-B Visa Violations Amid Scrutiny (August 26, 2025) Walmart denies H1-B visa violations at its Global Business Services, countering online speculation.* HUD Makes English Sole Language for Agency Business (August 26, 2025) HUD Secretary Scott Turner makes English the sole language for agency business, removing multi-language website options to prioritize American unity.* Bed and Bath Halts New Store Openings in California (August 26, 2025) Bed Bath & Beyond halts new physical store openings in California, focusing on online operations due to liberal policies.* Trump Plans National Guard Deployment to Baltimore (August 26, 2025) Trump signals plans to deploy National Guard to Baltimore, despite Democrat Governor Wes Moore’s resistance, to address city crime.* Minneapolis Catholic School Shooting Kills Two (August 27, 2025) Tranny shooter Robert Westman kills two children and injures 17 at Annunciation Catholic School in Minneapolis, prompting Trump’s call for prayers.* Trump Signs Executive Order for Classical Federal Architecture (August 27, 2025) Trump signs an executive order promoting classical architecture for federal buildings, rejecting modernist designs to restore national pride.* CDC Director Susan Monarez Fired by White House (August 27, 2025) The White House fires CDC Director Susan Monarez, clearing out COVID-era bureaucrats to pave the way for RFK’s health reforms.* Illinois Faces Federal Funding Cuts Over Bail Reform (August 27, 2025) Trump’s executive order withholds federal funding from Illinois for its cashless bail policy, targeting liberal crime leniency.* Air Force Grants Full Military Honors to Ashli Babbitt (August 28, 2025) The Air Force grants full military funeral honors to Ashli Babbitt, reversing Biden’s denial for the January 6 veteran, honoring her sacrifice.* USCG Cutter Hamilton Offloads $473 Million in Drugs (August 28, 2025) USCG Cutter Hamilton offloads 76,000 pounds of cocaine and marijuana, worth $473 million, in Florida, disrupting cartels under Trump’s Operation Pacific Viper.* E3 Triggers JCPOA Snapback Process Against Iran (August 28, 2025) The UK, France, and Germany initiate the JCPOA snapback to reimpose UN sanctions on Iran, aligning with Trump’s tough stance on Iran’s nuclear ambitions.* Cracker Barrel Scraps Rebrand After Backlash (August 28, 2025) Cracker Barrel scraps its “woke” rebrand after conservative backlash, admitting it “could’ve done better” to respect traditional values.* Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson Calls Crime Arrests “Racist” (August 29, 2025) Chicago Mayor Brandon Johnson claims arresting violent criminals is “racist,” despite a 30% drop in homicides, defending failed liberal policies.* FEMA Employees Put on Leave After Dissent Letter (August 29, 2025) FEMA employees who signed a dissent letter against Trump’s policies are placed on administrative leave, showing Trump’s crackdown on disloyalty.* Social Media Rumors Claim Trump Died, Debunked (August 29, 2025) Hashtags like #TrumpIsDead trend on X after Trump’s four-day absence, debunked by his golf outing, exposing Democrat-driven speculation.* Blue-Collar Wages Rise Fastest in 60 Years (August 30, 2025) Blue-collar wages increase at the fastest rate since the 1960s, with workers gaining $500 annually under Trump’s pro-worker policies.* Domestic Steel Production Surges by 100,000 Tons Weekly (August 30, 2025) US steel production rises by 100,000 tons per week, driven by Trump’s America First trade policies revitalizing industry.* Secretary Noem Reports Zero Illegal Alien Entries (August 30, 2025) Homeland Security Secretary Kristi Noem reports three months of zero illegal alien entries, with 1.6 million voluntarily returning home under Trump’s policies.* SBA Issues Fair Banking Executive Order (August 30, 2025) Trump’s executive order, enforced by SBA, orders 5,000 lenders to stop debanking individuals, protecting conservatives from woke financial attacks.* DHS Appoints Heather Honey for Election Integrity (August 30, 2025) DHS appoints Heather Honey as deputy assistant secretary for election integrity to safeguard elections from fraud, countering Democrat schemes.* FMCSA Reports Unqualified Truck Drivers in Multiple States (August 30, 2025) FMCSA reveals dozens of unqualified truck drivers in California, New Mexico, and Washington operated despite English proficiency violations, exposing liberal state oversight failures.Thanks for reading

Hey folks, Jeff here, with Adjust Accordionly—Episode 17: Roll Out the Cracker, blasting August 17–23, 2025, with more heat than a boomer torching a Cracker Barrel gift card! Michigan’s ballot-stuffing Dems get crushed by Trump’s mail-in ban, while DC’s streets gleam murder-free under his iron fist. Epstein and Maxwell’s elite secrets spill, sending panicans into an X-fueled frenzy. DHS boots 1.5 million illegals, and Noem’s ICE planes rev up for more. This polka’s a MAGA banger, and “Cyberbully’s” chiptune chaos memes the left into oblivion. Subscribe on Substack, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, and keep the Trooster polka rockin’!Eternal White Boy Summer Radio: https://ewbsx.app/Polka Week in Review: August 17 to 23, 2025Polka week in review, August seventeen to twenty-three’s news, Headlines blaze, we set the pace, let’s a-polka through, From DC’s sweep to elites’ dark heap, let’s go one-two-three, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, Adjust Accordionly! Michigan ballots stuffed, Trump bans mail-in votes, fraud’s end in sight, DC graffiti gone, murder’s done, Trump’s cleanup shines so bright, Gabbard strips, hoaxers’ rights, Missouri AG’s now FBI man, Israeli diddler nabbed, then let go, Bolton’s mustache gets slammed, Epstein files released, Maxwell’s transcript reads, still panicans cry, MS kicked from NBC, Mamdani arms very tiny, no surprise! Week’s a blast, news moves fast, polka’s got that swing! Trump’s fight’s bold, left’s tales fold, let the tubas ring! Hey, Trump hosts European leaders, Zelensky arrives in tails, Ho, USA births tank, Cracker Barrel rolls out fails, No liberal lies, we’ll keep the beat, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey, ho, Adjust Accordionly! DHS slams migrant acts, visas checked, millions flee Trump’s might, Indian truckers kill, work visas paused, borders locked up tight, Fake Marines threaten ICE, Letitia’s fraud, justice coming fast, Noem ICE planes, Uganda for Maryland Man, deportations blast, Border wall painted black, Guard troops stack, illegals out the door, Chicago to host Natty Guard, Finicum’s kin question, FBI’s lore! Week’s a spark, rips through the dark, polka’s got that flair! MAGA’s rise, no compromise, news fills the air! Week’s a blaze, left’s in a haze, hear the polka’s roar, From Trump’s border slam to elites’ scam, we settle the score! With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, our spirit’s unbound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found! Hey, DeSantis dumps tax, McMahon cuts rules, freedom’s on the rise, Ho, Canada tariffs cave, stocks hit highs, economy flies, Design chief builds, Intel stake seals, America’s future gleams, Hegseth and RFK flex, Kennedy Center’s Trump’s, it seems, No elite deceit, we’ll keep the beat, our polka’s always strong, Hey, ho, Adjust Accordionly! Adjust Accordionly!News Headlines Covered: August 17 to 23, 2025* Michigan Dem Councilman Caught Stuffing Ballots (August 17) A Michigan Democratic councilman is nabbed for illegally stuffing ballots, fueling voter fraud outrage and prompting calls for election reform.* Los Angeles Mayor Bass Slams Trump’s DC Takeover (August 17) Mayor Karen Bass rips into Trump’s federalization of DC police, decrying it as authoritarian while Trump supporters cheer the move.* DC Graffiti Erased Under Trump’s Cleanup (August 17) Trump’s aggressive DC cleanup initiative erases graffiti citywide, restoring order and boosting local morale with a pristine capital.* DHS Announces Penalties for Illegal Migrant Activities (August 17) DHS unveils stringent penalties targeting illegal migrant activities, ramping up enforcement to deter border violations nationwide.* Gabbard Revokes Security Clearances for Intel Hoaxers (August 17) Tulsi Gabbard yanks security clearances from intelligence officials tied to election hoaxes, exposing deep-state meddling in a bold sweep.* Indian Trucker’s Crash Kills 4 in Ohio (August 17) An Indian trucker’s reckless crash in Ohio kills four, igniting debates over foreign driver safety and immigration policies.* Trump Pauses Indian Trucker Work Visas (August 17) Trump halts work visas for Indian truckers after a deadly Ohio crash, prioritizing American safety and jobs in a swift crackdown.* Israeli Cyber Chief Alexandrovich Nabbed as Pedophile (August 17) Tom Artiom Alexandrovich, Israeli National Cyber Directorate official, is arrested in a Las Vegas sting for luring a minor online, sparking global controversy.* MS NOW Rebrands After MSNBC Ratings Flop (August 17) MSNBC rebrands as My Source News Opinion World (MS NOW) after catastrophic ratings, ditching NBC’s peacock logo in a desperate bid to survive.* Trump Lowers Refugee Cap to Historic Low (August 17) Trump slashes the US refugee cap to an all-time low, prioritizing national security and curbing immigration amid public support.* DeSantis Eliminates Florida Property Taxes (August 17) Governor Ron DeSantis abolishes Florida property taxes, saving homeowners billions and cementing his pro-freedom economic legacy.* Trump Bans Mail-In Voting Nationwide (August 17) Trump imposes a nationwide mail-in voting ban, citing rampant fraud risks and aiming to restore trust in elections.* Epstein Files Released, Expose Elite Connections (August 18) Unsealed Epstein files reveal sordid ties to global elites, reigniting demands for justice and accountability among the powerful.* Maxwell’s Prison Interviews Leaked, Fuel Outrage (August 18) Leaked Ghislaine Maxwell prison interviews expose elite cover-ups, enraging the public and amplifying calls for transparency.* Musk Plans “White Dudes for Trump” Party (August 18) Elon Musk organizes a provocative “White Dudes for Trump” bash, triggering liberal meltdowns and X-fueled hype.* Finicum Family Questions FBI Awards for LaVoy’s Assassination (August 18) The Finicum family demands answers after FBI agents receive awards for LaVoy Finicum’s fatal 2016 standoff, alleging a targeted assassination.* Trump Hosts European Leaders at White House (August 18) Trump dominates a White House summit, forcing European leaders to bend to his America First agenda in a diplomatic flex.* Zelensky Attends in Formal Suit, Ditching Tracksuit (August 18) Ukraine’s Zelensky swaps his tracksuit for a suit at Trump’s White House summit, signaling deference to MAGA’s global clout.* USA Birth Rate Hits Record Low (August 19) The US birth rate crashes to a historic low, alarming demographers and sparking debates over cultural and economic decline.* McMahon Cuts Department of Education Regulations (August 19) McMahon torches Department of Education red tape, slashing federal overreach and empowering local schools with less bureaucracy.* Fake Spanish-Speaking Marines Threaten ICE Agents (August 20) Spanish-speaking impostors, posing as Marines, threaten ICE agents, escalating border tensions and exposing security gaps.* Ed Martin Sues Letitia James for Fraud (August 20) Ed Martin files a fraud lawsuit against NY AG Letitia James, accusing her of abusing prosecutorial power in a political witch hunt.* DHS Reviews All Visa Programs (August 20) DHS launches a sweeping review of all visa programs, targeting loopholes to strengthen immigration enforcement nationwide.* 1.5 Million Illegal Immigrants Leave USA (August 20) Trump’s relentless immigration crackdown drives 1.5 million illegal immigrants to flee, reshaping the demographic landscape.* Missouri AG Joins FBI as Deputy Director (August 20) Missouri’s Attorney General takes FBI deputy director role, bolstering Trump’s law enforcement team with a conservative powerhouse.* Noem Pushes for ICE Deportation Planes (August 21) Kristi Noem demands ICE deploy dedicated planes for mass deportations, aiming to turbocharge illegal immigrant removals.* “Maryland Man” Garcia, Illegal Alien and Human Trafficker, Deported to Uganda (August 21) Kilmar Abrego Garcia, an illegal alien and convicted human trafficker is deported to Uganda under Trump’s policies.* Border Wall Painted Black for Intimidation (August 21) The US-Mexico border wall is painted black, a bold move to deter crossings with a menacing aesthetic overhaul.* DC Reports Zero Murders for First Time (August 22) DC achieves a historic first with zero murders, credited to Trump’s aggressive policing reforms and federal oversight.* FBI Raids John Bolton’s Home (August 22) The FBI storms John Bolton’s home in a mysterious raid, hinting at deep-state targeting amid swirling speculation.* Canada Caves to Trump’s Tariff Demands (August 23) Canada folds to Trump’s tariff threats, securing favorable trade terms that boost US economic leverage.* Stock Market Hits Record Highs (August 23) The US stock market skyrockets to all-time highs, driven by Trump’s pro-growth policies and investor confidence.* Trump Appoints Chief Design Officer for Infrastructure (August 23) Trump names a Chief Design Officer to oversee bold, patriotic infrastructure projects, reimagining America’s skyline.* National Guard Deployed to Curb Chicago Crime (August 23) 1,700 National Guard troops deploy to Chicago, tackling rampant crime with a heavy-handed response.* 1,700 Guard Troops Reinforce Border Security (August 23) An additional 1,700 National Guard troops bolster US-Mexico border security, fortifying Trump’s immigration crackdown.* Trump Secures Intel Stake for US Tech (August 23) Trump negotiates a major Intel stake, boosting US tech independence and countering global competitors.* Mamdani’s Bench Press Fail Goes Viral (August 23) Mamdani’s pathetic bench press attempt becomes a viral X joke, mocking liberal weakness with ruthless glee.* Cracker Barrel’s Logo Change Sparks Backlash (August 23) Cracker Barrel’s woke logo redesign ignites nationwide ridicule, with boycotts threatening the chain’s bottom line.* Hegseth, RFK Jr. Compete in Pull-Up Challenge (August 23) Pete Hegseth and RFK Jr. face off in a viral pull-up contest, flexing MAGA grit and owning the libs.* Kennedy Center Rebrands for Trump (August 23) The Kennedy Center adopts a Trum

Hey folks, Jeff here, with Adjust Accordionly—Episode 16: Polka and Order!, glitter-bombing August 10-16, 2025, with news spicier than a Subway sandwich toss! Trump’s D.C. police takeover has Mayor Bowser in a tizzy, while “Shifty” Schiff’s leaks spark DOJ fire. Texas’ ICE fortress buries sanctuary city dreams, and Melania smacks Hunter’s Epstein lies. This week’s polka’s a banger, and “Before It Was Gay” is a Biden-era callback to America’s pre-woke glory. Subscribe on Substack, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, YouTube, and keep the polka news rockin’!Polka Week in Review: August 10 to 16, 2025Polka week in review, August ten to sixteen’s news, Headlines roar, the fight’s hardcore, let’s polka through, From Trump’s DC grip, to shifty Schiff’s slip, let’s go one-two-three, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, Adjust Accordingly! Mexico’s boss cries, ICE raids ain’t nice, dodging migrant crime’s toll, Trump grabs DC’s reins, boots Bowser’s claims, law’s under his control, CBP Chinese meat, six thousand pound cheat, diseases they could bring, ICE apps flood, one hundred K studs, Trump’s border plan’s the thing, Stocks soar high, Trump’s policies fly, big economic wins, H-1B’s cut, Indian tech’s shut, American century begins! Week’s a blast, news moves fast, polka’s got that zing, Trump’s fight’s tight, the left’s in fright, let the tubas ring! Hey, Trump’s DC throne, Schiff’s crimes are shown, MAGA’s breaking chains, Ho, ICE trucks roll, Dems lose control, truth exposes their games, Crush their plots, fire the shots, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordingly! Feds storm streets, Bowser’s pleas take seat, law and order’s here to stay, DC curbs kids, clears homeless grids, Trump’s order leads the way, Lefty mobs yell, subway sandwich fell, their chaos flops in shame, Trump eyes urban mess, vows to address, MAGA’s cleaning the game, Texas redraws maps, GOP slaps, Dems’ gerrymander scheme, Courts back deport, third countries’ sort, it’s a border dream! News is wild, polka’s styled, truth’s the beat we chase, Trump’s bold stand, across the land, sets the patriot pace! Hey, Schiff’s leaks bust, Dems eat dust, Trump’s justice takes the crown, Ho, ICE builds big, Newsom’s rigged, MAGA tears it down, Drums and brass, guitars fast pass, our polka’s never wrong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordingly! ICE’s Texas cage, Trump’s deportation rage, sends illegals on the run, Newsom’s map threat, Dems’ desperate bet, Trump’s still number one, Courts eye gay marriage, ADL’s smears disparage, patriotism under fire, Musk sues Apple, Melania billion crackle, Hunter’s Epstein liar, Trump hosts Putin talk, Alaska’s walk, peace deal shakes the wire, Foreign counts drop, Trump’s on top, a new American empire! Week’s on fire, left’s in mire, polka’s call is loud, From Schiff’s dark scheme to Trump’s bold dream, troosters stand proud, With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, polka’s hearty sound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found! Hey, Trump’s DC grip, Schiff’s crimes slip, justice hunts the foe, Ho, ICE trucks hum, foreign counts plum, MAGA steals the show, Courts back deportations, Musk fights corporations, truth’s breaking through the haze, Newsom’s plots fail, Melania’s set to nail, Trump’s peace leads the days, Brass and beat, we dish the heat, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordingly!Adjust Accordingly!News Headlines Covered: August 10 to 16, 2025* Mexican President Slams ICE Raids, Claims U.S. Owes Success to Migrants (August 10, 2025) Mexican President lectures that ICE raids unfairly target Mexicans, who he claims fuel U.S. prosperity, dodging the chaos illegal immigration dumps on American communities.* DC Announces Juvenile Curfew Zone in Navy Yard (August 10, 2025) DC police slap a curfew on kids under 17 in Navy Yard from August 15-18, a half-hearted attempt to curb chaos as Trump’s federal hammer looms.* Trump Federalizes DC Police Under Home Rule Act (August 10, 2025) President Trump invokes Section 740 of the DC Home Rule Act, seizing control of DC police and deploying 800 National Guard troops to crush “crime and squalor,” despite Mayor Bowser’s whining about a 26% drop in violent crime.* CBP Seizes 6,682 lbs of Sketchy Chinese Animal Products in LA (August 10, 2025) CBP snags 6,682 lbs of unmanifested avian, swine, and ruminant products from China, mislabeled as tilapia by a repeat offender, risking deadly animal diseases due to lax import controls.* ICE Flooded with 100,000 Applications (August 10, 2025) ICE gets slammed with 100,000 applications, likely for enforcement or employment, showing Americans are ready to back Trump’s deportation agenda.* Stocks Soar to Record Highs on Trump’s Economic Wins (August 10, 2025) US stock markets hit all-time highs, riding Trump’s deregulation and America First policies, despite naysayers’ gripes about “unsustainable” gains.* Trump Banishes Obama’s Portrait to White House Backstairs (August 10, 2025) Trump moves Barack Obama’s portrait from the White House Grand Foyer to a private staircase, a fitting jab at his rival, alongside Bush portraits, shaking up tradition.* Trump’s H-1B Visa Overhaul Targets Indian Workers (August 10, 2025) Trump’s wage-based H-1B visa overhaul squeezes Indian tech workers, putting American jobs first despite globalist complaints.* Federal Agents Hit DC Streets in Trump’s Crime Crackdown (August 11, 2025) Federal troops and National Guard swarm DC streets under Trump’s orders, brushing off local claims of a 30-year crime low as Bowser cries “authoritarian.”* Homeless Camps Razed in DC Cleanup (August 12, 2025) Federal and local crews bulldoze DC homeless encampments, restoring order as Trump’s federal grip tightens, despite left-wing complaints of cruelty.* Anti-Trump Mob Chants “Trump Must Go” Outside White House (August 12, 2025) Hundreds of anti-Trump protesters swarm the White House, whining “Trump Must Go” over his DC takeover and immigration policies, met with federal muscle.* Democrat DOJ Flunkie Fired for Sandwich Assault on Feds (August 13, 2025) A DOJ employee gets canned and slapped with felony charges for chucking a Subway sandwich at federal officers in DC, exposing Democrat “law and order” hypocrisy.* Trump Vows to Tame Lawless Cities After DC Success (August 13, 2025) Trump promises to roll federal law enforcement into “lawless” cities like New York and Chicago post-DC, targeting crime despite local stats showing declines.* Texas Senate Approves GOP-Favored Redistricting Map (August 13, 2025) Texas Senate passes a GOP-backed redistricting map, strengthening Republican control and countering Democrat gerrymandering schemes like Newsom’s.* Largest ICE Detention Center to Open in Texas (August 14, 2025) ICE gears up to open a massive Texas detention center, supercharging Trump’s deportation machine and infuriating sanctuary city cheerleaders.* Newsom Threatens Trump with California Gerrymandering (August 14, 2025) Newsom threatens to rig California’s electoral maps to thwart Trump, a desperate Democrat power grab.* Supreme Court Eyes Challenge to 2015 Gay Marriage Ruling (August 15, 2025) The Supreme Court mulls revisiting its 2015 Obergefell ruling on gay marriage, spotlighting judicial overreach and cultural fault lines.* ADL Smears “America First” as Antisemitic (August 15, 2025) The Anti-Defamation League brands Trump’s “America First” slogan antisemitic, a shameless attack to demonize patriotism for political points.* Supreme Court Backs Trump’s Third-Country Deportations (August 15, 2025) The Supreme Court greenlights Trump’s plan to deport illegals to third countries, boosting his immigration crackdown.* Indian Flag in Ohio Stirs Patriot Backlash (August 16, 2025) An Indian flag raised at an Ohio public event sparks outrage over national identity, with critics slamming the elevation of foreign symbols on American soil.* Foreign-Born Population Plummets Under Trump (August 16, 2025) Census data shows a 2.2 million drop in the foreign-born population from January to July, a historic win for Trump’s immigration crackdown.* Musk’s xAI Takes on Apple in App Store Lawsuit (August 16, 2025) Elon Musk’s xAI sues Apple over anti-competitive App Store practices, a bold strike against Big Tech’s stranglehold on innovation.* Melania Demands Hunter Biden Retract Epstein Smear (August 16, 2025) Melania Trump demands Hunter Biden retract claims tying her to Jeffrey Epstein, threatening legal action over his defamatory lies.* Trump Hosts Putin in Alaska for Ukraine Talks (August 16, 2025) Trump rolls out the red carpet for Putin in Alaska to negotiate a Ukraine ceasefire, raising Ukrainian fears of a sellout while showcasing bold diplomacy.* Whistleblower: Schiff Greenlit Classified Leaks to Smear Trump (August 16, 2025) A Democratic whistleblower tells the FBI that Adam Schiff approved leaking classified info to target Trump, exposing Democrat corruption.* DOJ Probes Schiff for Alleged Crimes, Comer Says (August 16, 2025) James Comer hints at a DOJ investigation into Adam Schiff’s alleged crimes, warning J6 committee alums to watch their backs as Trump’s team hunts for justice.Thanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.Before It Was Gay“Hey old timer, why you drinking that Bud Light?” ”Huh?” ”Your Bud Light… it’s a tranny beer. You’re not queer or something, are you?” ”Listen here, motherfucker…” I bought this beer back before it was gay, Before they put rainbows on everything, Straight from the can or in a pint glass, Way before them homos shoving shit up their ass, Long before it all turned queer, I was kicking back a-chugging this beer, Ain’t no lisp talking straight when I say, Man, I bought this beer back before it was gay“You got yourself a Ford truck, huh?” ”Been driving these for years,” ”You know they’re gay now, right?” ”Listen here, motherfucker…” I drove a Ford back before it was gay, Way back before tranny library day, Tore through the mud flingin

Hey folks, Jeff here, with Adjust Accordionly—Episode 15: Polka Per Capita!, tearing through August 3rd to 9th, 2025, with news hotter than a D.C. carjacking! Edward “Big Balls” Coristine fought off “urban youth” thugs in the capital, sparking Trump’s plan to federalize D.C. and crush the black crime wave. In Cincinnati, Holly’s reeling from a black youth mob attack, with the C.R.S. too scared to spin their usual lies. Cory Booker’s “per capita” X flop proved Dems can’t count or cover up crime. Clinton’s Russia-gate hoax got smoked by a grand jury, Schiff and Leticia James are dodging D.O.J. heat, while Trump’s tariffs, H1-B cuts, and peace talks with Putin and Armenia-Azerbaijan make the world kneel to MAGA. This week’s polka’s a banger, and “Big Balls Eternal” is a glitch-synth, cyber-barian tribute to Coristine’s epic stand. Grab the lyrics, check the vids, subscribe, and keep the MAGA beat pumping! Adjust Accordionly is on Substack, Apple Podcasts, Spotify, and your favorite podcatcher!Polka Week in Review: August 3 to 9, 2025Polka week in review, August three to nine’s news, Headlines clash, the polka’s brash, let’s skip right on through, From Trump’s world peace to urban crime sprees, we’ll spin one-two-three, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, Adjust Accordionly! Texas Dems flee, quorum’s bust, Hot Wheels’ got their hide, Coristine’s beat, youth crime’s heat, Trump won’t let it slide, DOJ boots ICE-block wife, clash, it makes a scene, Voter IDs, Texas rocks, elections stay pristine, Clinton’s hoax, Russiagate’s broke, grand jury hunts her crew, Banks ditch Trump, Biden’s slump, MAGA’s pushing through! Week’s a blast, news moves fast, polka’s got that zing, Trump’s fight’s tight, left’s in fright, let the tubas ring! Hey, “urban crime” spikes, Dems tell lies, Trump’s fixing the mess, Ho, Clinton’s scam, DOJ’s jam, truth breaks the stress, Crush that box, squeeze liberal plots, our spirit’s always strong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordionly! Maxwell’s tapes, might spill Epstein, filth in full view, Trump slaps tariffs, H1B’s cut, America’s jobs stay true, Putin talks peace, Ukraine’s lease, Trump’s deal’s no bluff, Cincinnati brawl, black youth’s call, Holly’s had enough, Superman joins ICE, hiring’s nice, deportations roll, Howard Stern’s out, View’s in doubt, lefty media’s toll! News is wild, polka’s styled, truth’s the beat we chase, From crime’s dark wave to Trump’s brave save, we’re setting the pace! Hey, Cory Booker’s post, per capita’s roast, crime’s tearing the town, Ho, ICE is back, Dems in the sack, Trump’s wearing the crown, Drums and brass, guitars fast pass, our polka’s never wrong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordionly! Gaza war roars, Israel scores, genocide on the brain, Trump and grants, and census plans, MAGA’s got the rein, Green’s impeachment flops, Schiff’s fraud pops, Dems unravel, Letitia James gets hit, DOJ is lit, gavel’s gonna travel, Emory’s cop falls, Miran’s call, Fed’s under Trump’s sway, Armenia’s greet, Putin’s meet, peace is winning the day! Week’s on fire, left’s in mire, polka’s call is loud, From crime’s grim street to Trump’s bold beat, troosters stand proud, With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, polka’s hearty sound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found! Hey, Big Balls’ whip, per capita’s grip, black crime’s gotta go, Ho, Russiagate’s done, Trump’s just begun, truth’s starting to show, ICE trucks roll, Dems lose control, their scams are falling flat, Grants and peace, Trump’s on the crease, MAGA’s where it’s at, Brass and beat, we’ll take the heat, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordionly! Adjust Accordionly! News Headlines Covered: August 3 to 9, 2025* Texas Democrats Face Arrest and Lawsuits in Redistricting Standoff (August 3) Hot Wheels Abbott threatens to remove Texas House Democrats for breaking quorum to block a GOP redistricting plan. Republicans pass an 85-6 arrest motion. AG Ken Paxton sues 13 Democrats. FBI Director Kash Patel assists. Quorum fails multiple times.* Edward “Big Balls” Coristine Attacked by Youth in D.C. (August 3) Edward Coristine, a 19-year-old former DOGE staffer, is beaten by youth in a D.C. carjacking attempt near Logan Circle, sustaining a concussion. Two 15-year-olds are arrested.* DOJ Fires Spouse of ICE Tracking App Founder (August 4) DOJ terminates an employee, the spouse of an ICE tracking app founder, amid scrutiny over immigration tech conflicts.* 5th Circuit Upholds Texas Voter ID Law (August 4)A unanimous 5th Circuit panel upholds Texas’s law requiring Voter IDs for mail-in ballots. Non-compliant votes are rejected to secure elections.* Russiagate Exposed and DOJ Launches Grand Jury Probe (August 4) Declassified Durham documents reveal Hillary Clinton approved the Trump-Russia hoax. DNI Tulsi Gabbard urges AG Pam Bondi to launch a grand jury probe into Obama-era officials’ roles.* JP Morgan and Bank of America Accused of Debanking Trump (August 4) Reports claim JP Morgan and Bank of America debanked Trump under Biden’s slump-era pressure over January 6. GOP outrage is fueled.* House Oversight Subpoenas Clintons and Others for Epstein and Russiagate Probes (August 5) House Oversight Chairman James Comer subpoenas Bill and Hillary Clinton, former DOJ officials (Garland, Barr, Sessions, Holder, Lynch, Gonzales), and ex-FBI Directors Comey and Mueller for testimony on Jeffrey Epstein’s crimes and Democratic weaponization of the Russia hoax.* Trump Considers Releasing Maxwell Interview Transcripts (August 5) The Trump administration debates releasing Deputy AG Todd Blanche’s Ghislaine Maxwell interview transcripts. Epstein case transparency is pushed.* Trump Raises Tariffs on Indian Imports (August 5) Trump imposes new tariffs on Indian goods as part of his “Liberation Day” tariff policy. Average tariffs hit 17%.* Trump Changes H1B Visa Program Rules (August 5) Trump reforms the H1B visa program, tightening eligibility to prioritize American workers.* Trump Envoy Meets Putin to Discuss Ukraine Ceasefire (August 5) Trump’s envoy Steve Witkoff, joined by Sen. Marco Rubio, meets Putin in Moscow to discuss a Ukraine ceasefire. Putin is open to ending the war for eastern Ukraine.* Cincinnati Attack: Black Youth Attack White Victims, CRS Influence Wanes (August 5) Holly, a single mother beaten by black youth in a July 26 Cincinnati brawl, speaks out about brain trauma. No Community Relations Service spins victims as racists. Auron MacIntyre notes Trump may defund or disband CRS.* Dean Cain Joins ICE as Honorary Officer (August 6) Former Superman actor Dean Cain joins ICE in an honorary role, sparking backlash from actor John Leguizamo.* Fort Stewart Shooting Reported (August 6) Five soldiers are shot at Fort Stewart, Georgia, prompting a base lockdown. Details remain limited.* Trump Threatens to Federalize D.C. After Coristine Attack (August 6) After Trump staffer Edward Coristine is beaten by youth in a D.C. carjacking attempt, Trump threatens to federalize D.C. to curb youth crime ignored by local leaders.* ICE Reports Record Hiring Numbers (August 6) ICE announces record hiring, boosted by removing age limits, to support Trump’s deportation push.* National Park Service Plans to Reinstall Confederate Statue in D.C. (August 6) The National Park Service plans to reinstall a Confederate general’s statue in D.C., toppled in 2020, citing historical preservation.* ICE Conducts Surprise Raids in Sanctuary Cities (August 6) ICE and Border Patrol agents launch raids in sanctuary city Home Depot parking lots, targeting illegal immigrants.* Penske Trucking Disavows ICE Using Vehicles for Raids (August 6) Penske Trucking distances itself from ICE after reports their rental trucks were used in immigration raids.* Howard Stern’s Show Reportedly Canceled (August 6) Howard Stern learns his show is canceled via a news alert, ending his long-running radio program.* Israel’s Gaza City Takeover Sparks Global Outrage (August 7) Israel’s security cabinet greenlights a Gaza City occupation, escalating its war with Hamas. Claims of genocide draw UN and global condemnation.* Trump Announces New Census Excluding Undocumented Immigrants (August 7) Trump orders a new census to exclude undocumented immigrants, aiming to boost GOP electoral power.* Trump Issues Executive Order on Federal Grants (August 7) Trump signs an EO requiring his appointees to approve federal grant spending, aligning funds with MAGA priorities.* Al Green Renews Push to Impeach Trump (August 7) Rep. Al Green files new impeachment articles against Trump, alleging abuses of power. Odds are slim in a GOP House.* Emory University Shooting Kills Officer (August 7) A shooting at Emory University kills a police officer near the CDC complex, triggering a lockdown and security debates.* Adam Schiff Accused of Mortgage Fraud (August 7) Allegations emerge that Rep. Adam Schiff engaged in mortgage fraud. GOP calls for investigation. Details are unconfirmed.* SNAP Program Bans Sugary Foods and Drinks (August 7) The Trump administration bans SNAP benefits for sugary foods and drinks, sparking debate over government overreach.* ABC Considers Canceling The View Amid Declining Ratings (August 7) ABC evaluates canceling The View due to falling viewership and host controversies.* DOJ Subpoenas Letitia James Over Trump Fraud Case (August 7) Federal prosecutors subpoena NY AG Letitia James over her Trump fraud case, seen as a politicized attack.* Trump Brokers Armenia-Azerbaijan Peace Talks (August 8) Trump hosts Armenia and Azerbaijan leaders at the White House for peace talks, marking a diplomatic win.* Trump Nominates Stephen Miran to Federal Reserve Board (August 8) Trump nominates economic aide Stephen Miran to temporarily fill a Federal Reserve seat.* Trump Announces Meeting With Putin in Alaska (August 9) Trump confirms a meeting with Vladimir Putin on August 15 in Alaska to discuss a Ukraine ceasefire.Thanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! 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Hey folks, Jeff here, with Adjust Accordionly—Episode 14: Polka Tariff-ico!, tearing through July 27th to August 2nd, 2025, with news that’ll jolt your patriot pulse! Trump’s tariffs crushed Canada, South Korea, and the EU for a cool $750 billion, while Texas busted an illegal alien pedophile ring and ICE hired up like it’s border lockdown season. The deep state’s burying Epstein’s files, Strzok’s X posts vanished, and Warren faceplanted on the Senate floor—progressive dreams in freefall! Hulk Hogan got his day in Florida, Trump’s golden ballroom sparkles, and some Luigi clone’s sniping execs in NYC. Russia’s Medvedev rattled sabers, but Trump’s subs said “not today.” This week’s polka’s got fire, and “America’s Back!” will have you headbanging to tariff triumphs with its metal roar. Grab the lyrics, check the vids, subscribe, and let’s keep the MAGA beat alive!Polka Week in Review: July 27 to August 2, 2025Polka week in review, July twenty-seven to August two's news, Headlines roar, the polka soars, let’s all cut loose, From Trump’s trade wins to Warren’s spin, let’s go one-two-three, Grab your accordion, let's set it, Adjust Accordionly! Thailand, Cambodia kneel, Trump’s peace and trade ignite, EU’s billions pour, tariffs soar, globalists take flight, Canada, Korea taxed, Trump’s tariffs slap ‘em down, Epstein files choke, FBI’s joke, deep state’s a shady town, Dems chase, Epstein list, Maxwell’s pardon stirs the pot, Texas jails illegals, ICE recruits, borders hot!Week’s a blast, news flies fast, polka’s got that zing! From Trump’s bold fight to left’s sad plight, let the tubas ring! Hey, Trump’s trade rules, lefty fools, tariffs shake the globe, Ho, Deep state hides, Maxwell slides, truth’s stuck in a probe, Trade deals feat, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordionly! Paxton crushes BlackRock, Brown U’s scams get canned, GDP climbs high, Fed rates die, Trump’s economy’s grand, Trump boots jobs chief, SCOTUS cleans, race-based maps away, Texas redraws lines, anti-white’s done, fairness saves the day! Russia’s threats bark, Trump’s subs shark, strength keeps foes in check!Cincinnati bleeds, Jersey quakes, Trump’s order’s no wreck! Hey, Paxton’s win, economy’s grin, Trump’s might’s on display, Ho, Crime and quakes, lefty breaks, law and order’s way, Squeeze that box, make liberals drop, woah—our polka’s strong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordionly! NPR’s toast, Hulk’s day boasts, MAGA dreams take flight, Golf Force rolls, ballroom’s gold, Trump’s style’s pure delight, Russia’s warned, just ten days more, courts play tariff schemes, Strzok’s posts gone, FBI’s con, Epstein’s truth still gleams! Week’s a blaze, left’s in a haze, polka’s call is loud, From America’s stand, to trustin’ the plan, troosters stand proud, With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, polka’s hearty sound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found! Hey, New York City, executive shot, Luigi is to blame, Ho, Windmills axed, fitness back, Trump restores the game, Harris bribes crash, Cali race dashed, her schemes fall flat, Warren’s tumble, left’s in rubble, progressives’ sad prat, Drums and brass, guitar’s fast pass, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordionly! Adjust Accordionly!News Headlines Covered: July 27 to August 2, 2025* Peter Strzok’s Wayback Machine Posts Vanish Amid Russia Hoax Fallout (July 27, 2025) Archived X posts from former FBI agent Peter Strzok, central to the debunked Trump-Russia collusion narrative, are removed from the Wayback Machine, raising suspicions of efforts to erase evidence of FBI misconduct.* Trump Accuses Democrats of Illegal $11 Million Celebrity Bribes for Harris Campaign (July 27, 2025) Trump claims Democrats illegally paid $11 million to celebrities like Beyoncé for Kamala Harris’s 2024 campaign endorsements, calling it an election scam, though FEC records only show $165,000 to Beyoncé’s production company for event costs.* Trump Slams Windmills, Vows to Protect America’s Scenery (July 27, 2025) President Trump declares windmills ruin America’s natural beauty, promising a ban to preserve the nation’s landscapes from unsightly renewable energy projects.* Thailand, Cambodia Reach Trump-Brokered Ceasefire Deal (July 28, 2025) Trump’s diplomatic push leads to a ceasefire between Thailand and Cambodia, ending a border conflict that displaced 260,000, showcasing his America-first influence in global peace talks.* Blackstone Executive Assassinated in NYC Shooting (July 29, 2025) Wesley LePatner, a Blackstone executive, is killed in a targeted Manhattan shooting, raising concerns about urban crime and the need for Trump’s law-and-order policies.* Trump Secures Massive EU Trade Deal with $750 Billion Investment, Zero Tariffs (July 30, 2025) President Trump announces a historic trade agreement with the EU, including $750 billion in energy investments and zero tariffs, boosting American jobs and countering globalist trade policies.* Trump Pushes South Korea to Accept 15% Tariff Deal (July 30, 2025) Despite an existing free trade agreement, Trump negotiates a new deal imposing 15% tariffs on South Korean imports, prioritizing American economic interests.* Senate Democrats Threaten Lawsuit Over Epstein Files (July 30, 2025) Senate Minority Leader Chuck Schumer invokes a 1928 law to demand the Justice Department release Epstein files, but conservatives suspect it’s a political stunt to distract from DOJ transparency under Trump.* Kamala Harris Opts Out of California Governor Race (July 30, 2025) Former VP Kamala Harris announces she won’t run for California governor in 2027, likely eyeing another presidential bid in 2028, dodging accountability for her failed 2024 campaign.* Q2 GDP Growth Exceeds Expectations at 3% (July 30, 2025) The U.S. economy grows at a robust 3% in Q2 2025, surpassing forecasts, with Trump touting the success as proof of his America-first policies driving prosperity.* Trump Dismisses Inflation Fears, Pushes Fed for Lower Rates (July 30, 2025) Trump rejects economic analysts’ inflation concerns, urging Federal Reserve Chair Jerome Powell to cut interest rates to boost home buying and refinancing.* Texas Republicans Propose Redistricting to Secure GOP House Seats (July 30, 2025) Following Trump’s urging, Texas unveils a redistricting plan to add five safe Republican House seats, strengthening GOP control ahead of 2026 midterms.* Senate Rejects Resolutions to Block Arms Sales to Israel (July 30, 2025) The Senate overwhelmingly votes down Bernie Sanders’ resolutions to halt arms sales to Israel, ensuring continued U.S. support despite Gaza’s humanitarian crisis, a win for conservatives backing Israel.* US Tariff Revenues Hit Record $28 Billion in July 2025 (July 31, 2025) U.S. tariff revenues soar to a monthly record of $28 billion, validating Trump’s trade strategy as a win for American economic independence.* Trump Raises Tariffs on Canada, Citing Palestinian State Support (July 31, 2025) Trump imposes new tariffs on Canada after it joins the UK and Malta in recognizing Palestine as a state, signaling a strong stance against anti-Israel policies.* DOJ Redacts Trump’s Name in Epstein Files, Sparks Cover-Up Claims (July 31, 2025) The FBI, under AG Pam Bondi, redacts Trump’s name from Epstein files, fueling conservative outrage over potential suppression of truth while Democrats demand full disclosure.* FBI Denies Missing Minute in Epstein Jail Tape (July 31, 2025) The FBI claims a reported “missing minute” from Jeffrey Epstein’s jail surveillance tape never existed, raising suspicions of a cover-up to protect elites tied to the disgraced financier.* Ghislaine Maxwell Moved to Luxury Texas Prison, Pardon Rumors Swirl (July 31, 2025) Epstein accomplice Ghislaine Maxwell is transferred to a minimum-security prison in Texas, prompting speculation Trump may offer a pardon to clear his name, despite official denials.* Texas Busts Illegal Alien Pedophile Ring (July 31, 2025) Texas authorities arrest members of an illegal immigrant pedophile ring, reinforcing the need for Trump’s tough immigration policies to protect American communities.* ICE Boosts Recruiting with $50,000 Bonuses, Poaches Local Law Enforcement (July 31, 2025) ICE ramps up hiring with a $50,000 signing bonus and $60,000 student loan repayment, targeting local officers from the 287(g) program to enforce immigration laws aggressively.* Ken Paxton Secures Victory Against BlackRock, Vanguard, State Street (July 31, 2025) Texas AG Ken Paxton wins a major legal battle against financial giants BlackRock, Vanguard, and State Street, curbing their influence and protecting Texas from woke corporate agendas.* Ron DeSantis Declares Hulk Hogan Day in Florida (July 31, 2025) Florida Governor Ron DeSantis proclaims “Hulk Hogan Day” to honor the wrestling legend, celebrating American patriotism and Trump’s cultural allies.* Trump Fires Commissioner Over Jobs Report Disputes (July 31, 2025) Trump dismisses the commissioner responsible for jobs reports, citing inaccuracies, as part of his push to ensure economic data reflects his administration’s successes.* Trump Sends Two Nuclear Subs to Counter Russian Threats (August 1, 2025) Amid nuclear threats from Russia’s Dmitry Medvedev, Trump deploys two nuclear submarines to signal strength and deter aggression against U.S. interests.* Medvedev Issues Nuclear Threats Against U.S. (August 1, 2025) Russian official Dmitry Medvedev escalates tensions with nuclear threats, underscoring the need for Trump’s robust national security policies to protect America.* Cincinnati Jazz Fest Attack Leaves Several Injured (August 1, 2025) A violent attack at the Cincinnati Jazz Festival injures attendees, highlighting the need for stronger law enforcement and public safety measures under Trump.* New Jersey Earthquake Rattles Region (August 1, 2025) A minor earthquake strikes New Jersey, prompting calls for better infrastructure preparedness, with conservatives noting Trump

Hey folks, Jeff here, with Adjust Accordionly—Episode 13: Polkamania, Brother!, slappin’ through July 20th to 26th, 2025, with news that’ll make your ears tingle! Tragically, we lost Ozzy Osbourne and Hulk Hogan this week—pour one out for those men. Trump’s suing The Wall Street Journal for $10 billion, the DOJ’s Epstein pull got blocked by another Obama judge, and white folks are building Ozark communities. Congress codified Trump’s Executive Orders, Hunter Biden’s crack cocaine recipes are making the rounds, and Hillary’s emails are back under the microscope. Twenty states sued over sanctuary cities, Coca-Cola’s sweet on cane sugar, and Mexican beer sales plummeted right along with border jumps—imagine that! Obama’s inching towards a perp walk and the Thailand-Cambodia border brawl keeps the drama high, and a bunch of other stuff! This week’s polka’s got zing, and “One Big Beautiful Bill” will have you dancin’ on tax cuts and border walls with its pop-ska beat. Grab the lyrics, check the vids, subscribe, and let’s keep the polka alive!TRUMP 47 • Week 27 of 208 • GAME OVER LIBSEpisode link: https://x.com/paul_suda/status/1948482937667965195Polka Week in Review: July 20 to July 26, 2025Polka week in review, July twenty to twenty-six news, Headlines drop, the polka hops, let’s all bust loose, From Epstein’s files to border trials, let’s go one-two-three, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, Adjust Accordingly! Theo’s gone, Ozzy’s gone, Hulk Hogan says goodbye, Trump sues Journal for ten billion, banned from Scotland ply, DOJ wants scripts, judge blocks files, no Epstein docs, Congress codifies EOs, woke AI’s curbed, Trump locks, Hunter podcast, making crack, DOJ drops Hillary’s mail, Twenty state lawsuit, sanctuaries cry, Homan’s bringing hell!Week’s a blast, news zips past, polka’s got that zing! From celebrity loss to legal toss, let the tubas ring! Hey, pour one out for our boys, make it two for Hogan’s might, Ho, judge’s block, Hunter’s mocked, sanctuary’s blight, Sugar cane in Coke, no Mexican beer, our polka’s strong, Hey, ho, Adjust Accordingly! Obama and Russia, Kohberger sentenced, Thai and Cambodia fight, Macrons sue Owens, Obama does treason, Ozark build’s all white, Columbia’s settlement, two hundred mil, DEI programs end, FCC commands, the corporate’s hand, SIG isn’t Air Force’s friend, Senate lunch protest, Trump owns Japan, the Stop Hate Act, Paper straws out, old gas cans in, gun rights coming back! Week’s a spark, news leaves its mark, polka’s got that flair! From legal slights to DEI fights, news fills the air! Hey, Obama’s done, reclaiming our guns, Macrons’ legal mess, Ho, Columbia’s cash, DEI’s crash, Thailand’s border stress, Trump’s Japan deal, AstraZeneca’s seal, our polka’s always strong, Hey, ho, Adjust Accordingly! Week’s a blaze, left’s in a haze, polka’s call is grand, With old gas cans and our leader’s plans, we’ll resurrect our land, With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, polka’s hearty sound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found! Hey, US leaves UNESCO, Vance targets Microsoft’s H-1Bs, Ho, Tea app’s breach, Trump’s first six months, policy decrees, California wages, eighteen thousand jobs, man arrested for threatening, WNBA t-shirts say to pay, Olympics ban trans athletes, Drums and brass, guitar’s fast pass, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey, ho, Adjust Accordingly!Adjust Accordingly!News Headlines Covered: July 20 to July 26, 2025* Malcolm-Jamal Warner Drowns in Costa Rica Accident (July 20, 2025) Actor Malcolm-Jamal Warner, known for The Cosby Show, dies at 54 in an accidental drowning while saving his daughter, highlighting risks of progressive-led tourism policies.* Trump Sues Wall Street Journal for $10 Billion Over Epstein Letter (July 20, 2025) President Trump files a defamation lawsuit against the Wall Street Journal, Rupert Murdoch, and News Corp, alleging a fabricated Epstein letter to smear his reputation.* DOJ Seeks to Unseal Epstein Grand Jury Transcripts (July 20, 2025) Attorney General Pam Bondi pushes to release Epstein case transcripts, aligning with Trump’s transparency demands despite liberal judges’ obstruction.* Congress Codifies Trump’s Executive Orders Into Law (July 20, 2025) Republican-led Congress passes laws to enshrine Trump’s deregulation and immigration orders, securing his agenda against leftist sabotage.* Hunter Biden’s Profanity-Laced Podcast Stirs Controversy (July 21, 2025) Hunter Biden’s expletive-filled YouTube interview blaming Ambien for his father’s failures distracts from Trump’s wins, exposing Democratic chaos.* 20 States Sue Trump Admin to Keep Benefits for Illegal Immigrants (July 21, 2025) New York AG Letitia James leads 20 Democratic states in suing to preserve taxpayer-funded benefits for illegal immigrants, defying Trump’s crackdown.* Homan Vows ICE Crackdown on Sanctuary Cities (July 21, 2025) Border Czar Tom Homan pledges to flood sanctuary cities like New York with ICE agents, bypassing local jails to deport illegal immigrants.* Congress Recesses Amid Epstein File Disputes (July 21, 2025) House Speaker Mike Johnson halts Congress early, dodging Democratic efforts to force votes on Epstein document releases, prioritizing GOP strategy.* Coca-Cola Switches to Cane Sugar Amid Trump Tariffs (July 22, 2025) Coca-Cola shifts to cane sugar for select products, driven by Trump’s tariffs that bolster American agriculture over foreign imports.* Trump Bars Wall Street Journal From Press Trip Over Epstein Story (July 22, 2025) The White House excludes Wall Street Journal reporters from Trump’s Scotland trip, retaliating against their fake news Epstein coverage.* Trump Accuses Obama of Treason Over Russia Probe (July 22, 2025) Trump alleges Obama committed treason by orchestrating the 2016 Russia probe to sabotage his campaign, reigniting MAGA calls for accountability.* Tulsi Gabbard Urges DOJ to Probe Obama Officials (July 22, 2025) DNI Tulsi Gabbard refers Obama-era officials to the DOJ, alleging they fabricated the Russia probe to undermine Trump, exposing deep-state corruption.* DOJ Releases Clinton Email Files (July 22, 2025) The DOJ, under Pam Bondi, releases redacted Clinton email files.* Man Arrested for Threats Over Epstein Files (July 22, 2025) Florida’s Terell Bailey-Corsey, 31, is arrested for violent X post threats against officials tied to the Epstein case, frustrated by no client list.* Ozzy Osbourne Dies at 76 After Final Performance (July 22, 2025) Rock icon Ozzy Osbourne passes away at 76 in Buckinghamshire after a final Black Sabbath performance, leaving a heavy metal legacy.* U.S. Olympic Committee Bars Transgender Women From Women’s Sports (July 22, 2025) The USOPC complies with Trump’s executive order, banning transgender women from women’s sports to ensure fairness, overriding liberal policies.* Judge Blocks DOJ’s Epstein File Release (July 23, 2025) An Obama-appointed judge denies the DOJ’s request to unseal 2006 Epstein grand jury transcripts, obstructing Trump’s transparency push.* Arkansas Community Pushes Whites-Only Expansion (July 23, 2025) An Arkansas community project sparks outrage with plans for a whites-only expansion, exposing liberal hypocrisy on diversity.* Macrons Sue Candace Owens for Defamation Over Trans Claims (July 23, 2025) French President Emmanuel Macron and Brigitte sue Candace Owens in Delaware for spreading “false claims” that Brigitte was born male.* Kohberger Sentenced (July 23, 2025) Bryan Kohberger receives four consecutive life sentences for the Idaho murders, a victory for law and order under Trump’s justice reforms.* Trump Secures Historic Japan Trade Deal (July 24, 2025) Trump announces a major trade deal with Japan, opening markets for U.S. cars and agriculture, countering globalist trade policies.* House Oversight Subpoenas DOJ for Epstein Files (July 24, 2025) Rep. Thomas Massie leads Republicans in subpoenaing the DOJ for Epstein documents, aligning with MAGA demands for elite accountability.* Hulk Hogan Dies of Cardiac Arrest at 71 (July 24, 2025) Wrestling legend Hulk Hogan, a MAGA icon, dies of cardiac arrest at 71 in Florida, leaving a legacy of WWE transformation and Trump support.* Columbia University Settles Antisemitism Dispute for $200 Million (July 24, 2025) Columbia pays $200 million to the Trump admin to settle antisemitism allegations from Gaza protests, complying with federal demands to curb campus unrest.* Redistricting and Election Reform Battles Intensify (July 24, 2025) Trump urges GOP-led states, particularly Texas and Florida, to redraw House maps to cement conservative power, triggering Democratic lawsuits to protect gerrymandered districts and ensure fair elections.* AstraZeneca Invests $50 Billion in U.S. Manufacturing (July 24, 2025) AstraZeneca commits $50 billion to U.S. production, driven by Trump’s tariffs, boosting American jobs and reducing globalist supply chain reliance.* Protest in Senate Cafeteria (July 24, 2025) Activists disrupt the Senate cafeteria, protesting bipartisan support for Israel’s Gaza policies.* Air Force Pauses SIG M18 Use After Airman’s Death (July 25, 2025) The Air Force halts SIG Sauer M18 use after an airman’s death, raising safety concerns.* FCC Pressures Firms to Drop DEI Programs (July 25, 2025) Trump-appointed FCC officials push telecom companies to eliminate diversity, equity, and inclusion initiatives, prioritizing merit over woke policies.* California’s $20 Minimum Wage Cuts 18,000 Jobs (July 25, 2025) California’s $20 minimum wage law leads to 18,000 fewer fast food jobs, proving conservative warnings about progressive economic harm.* DOJ Sues NYC Over Sanctuary City Violations (July 25, 2025) The Justice Department sues New York City for shielding illegal immigrants, challenging sanctuary policies defying Trump’s enforcement.* Trump Cancels Paper Straw Mandate (July 25, 2025) Trump repeals a federal paper straw mandate, freeing businesses from burdensome environmental rules and restoring consumer

Hey folks, Jeff here with Adjust Accordionly—Episode 12: Make America Polka Again, squeezin’ through July 13th to 19th, 2025, with news that’ll make your bellows pump harder than Andy Byron’s Jumbotron grin! Biden’s autopen pardons flop like a Panican tantrum, Gabbard slaps Obama’s deep state with a Big Mike aloha, and Trump’s pending Epstein file drop has elites sweatin’ like Israel after bombin’ a Gaza church! SCOTUS greenlights Trump’s school cuts, Paxton jails quorum-dodgin’ Dems, and Elmo’s X hack tickles the third rail. This week’s polka’s got more zing than S&P’s record highs, and “Don’t Panic!” will have you dancin’ past the woke haze. Grab the lyrics, check the vids, subscribe, and let’s Make America Polka Again!Polka Week in Review: July 13 to July 19, 2025Polka week in review, July thirteen to nineteen’s news, Headlines pop, the polka’s hop, let’s light the fuse, From Trump’s big wins to Epstein’s sins, let’s go one-two-three, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, Adjust Accordingly! Biden’s pardons, autopen fakes, oh what a sham! Trump guards Christians, stops bans, faith’s foes get slammed! Hamadeh blasts Powell’s Fed, globalists lose their grip, Elmo’s hacked, tickle-me slurs, Sesame in a whip! Musk’s tweets rile NASA’s wrath, SpaceX on the fence, Boebert wants Gaetz for Epstein’s files, Trump releases the defense! Week’s a blast, news moves fast, polka’s got that zing! From MAGA’s might to deep state’s fright, let the tubas ring! Hey, MAGA fumes at Trump, Epstein’s list stays hid, Ho, Trump’s Gaza peace talk shines, all the work he did, Stocks hit highs, S&P flies, Trump’s econ’s the song, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordingly! Trump cuts State Department bloat, diplomats hit the road, Paxton jails Dems for quorum dodge, sues trans swim’s woke code, Mexico sues ICE for Garcia’s trip, borders doing fine, Israel’s bomb hits Gaza church, their sorry’s just a line, Huckabee slams Israel’s Christian block, Bove’s Trump’s court pick, UK’s teen vote law, London free fall, the boxes they’ll tick! Week’s a spark, lights up the dark, polka’s got that flair! From Trump’s bold fight to woke’s last night, news fills the air! Hey, Salazar’s amnesty plan, similar surnames echo the same, Ho, Colbert’s show tanks, he’s out the door with no shame, Dollar shakes England’s banks, Europe’s being tamed, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordingly! Week’s a blaze, left’s in a haze, polka’s call is loud, With Trump’s strong hand, rules the land, troosters stand proud, With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, polka’s hearty sound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found! Hey, Gabbard nails Obama’s lies, deep state’s caught in a jam, Ho, SCOTUS frees Trump’s school cuts, feds lose their scam, Huckabee calls Israel’s bluff, Bove strengthens Trump’s gold ring, Gaza bombs to Epstein’s files, plan troosters all will sing, Drums and brass, guitar’s fast pass, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordingly! Adjust accordingly!News Headlines Covered: July 13 to July 19, 2025* Biden’s Pardon Signatures Questioned for Autopen Use (July 13, 2025) Posts on X and a New York Times report confirm signatures on Biden’s January 19, 2025, pardons, including for Fauci and Milley, appear identical, suggesting autopen use. Critics slam it as a sign of Biden’s detachment and bureaucratic fraud.* Trump Pushes Executive Order to Combat Anti-Christian Bias (July 13, 2025) President Trump announces an executive order to address perceived anti-Christian bias in federal policies, targeting regulations restricting religious freedoms. Supporters view it as defending traditional values; critics call it divisive.* Hamadeh Demands Federal Reserve Chair Powell’s Resignation (July 13, 2025) Arizona Republican Abe Hamadeh calls for Jerome Powell’s resignation, citing the Federal Reserve’s inflation policies as harmful to American workers. He argues Powell’s tenure favors globalist interests over national prosperity.* Elmo’s X Account Hacked, Posts Racist Content (July 13, 2025) The official X account for Sesame Street’s Elmo is hacked, posting racist messages before being taken offline. Sesame Workshop works to regain control, exposing vulnerabilities in public social media accounts.* SpaceX Faces Federal Contract Review Over Musk’s X Posts (July 13, 2025) Biden administration’s outgoing NASA officials review SpaceX’s federal contracts, citing Elon Musk’s X posts as potential ethics violations. Conservatives decry it as a partisan attack on Musk’s free speech.* Boebert Calls for Special Counsel on Epstein Files, Suggests Gaetz (July 14, 2025) Rep. Lauren Boebert demands a special counsel to investigate Trump’s handling of Jeffrey Epstein’s files, suggesting Matt Gaetz lead it. She argues the public deserves transparency; Trump rejects the idea.* Trump Faces MAGA Backlash Over Epstein Files (July 14, 2025) President Trump faces criticism from his base for downplaying Jeffrey Epstein’s file release after the Justice Department claims no “client list” exists. MAGA supporters demand more transparency, suspecting an elite cover-up.* Trump Proposes Gaza Ceasefire Framework (July 14, 2025) President Trump outlines a potential Gaza ceasefire deal, emphasizing U.S. mediation to ease tensions. Details are vague, with critics questioning its feasibility amid Israeli-Palestinian complexities.* State Department Faces Significant Layoffs (July 14, 2025) The Trump administration initiates layoffs at the State Department, targeting career diplomats seen as loyal to globalist policies. Supporters praise streamlining bureaucracy; critics warn it weakens U.S. diplomacy.* S&P 500 and Nasdaq Hit Record Highs (July 14, 2025) The S&P 500 and Nasdaq close at all-time highs, with the S&P 500 reaching 627.58, driven by tech and energy optimism. Trump supporters credit his economic policies; analysts note global market trends.* Texas AG Paxton Threatens Arrests Over Democrat Quorum Dodging (July 15, 2025) Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton vows to arrest Democratic lawmakers fleeing the state to block quorum on voting legislation, echoing 2021 tactics. Conservatives hail it as upholding duty; opponents call it authoritarian.* Mexico Files Lawsuit Against ICE Over Jamie Garcia’s Death (July 15, 2025) Mexico sues U.S. Immigration and Customs Enforcement, alleging negligence in the death of detainee Jamie Garcia. The case fuels debate over immigration detention conditions and U.S.-Mexico relations.* Israel Issues Apology After Strike Hits Gaza Catholic Church (July 15, 2025) Israel’s government apologizes after a stray munition strikes the Holy Family Church in Gaza, causing civilian casualties. Netanyahu’s office calls it a tragedy; critics demand accountability for targeting errors.* Mike Huckabee Alleges Israel Discriminates Against Christians (July 15, 2025) Former Governor Mike Huckabee claims Israel’s policies restrict Christian religious practices, citing access issues to holy sites. Some conservatives back his call for reform; others defend Israel’s security measures.* UK Approves Voting Rights for 16-Year-Olds (July 16, 2025) The United Kingdom passes legislation allowing 16-year-olds to vote in national elections, aiming to boost youth engagement. Critics argue it skews elections toward progressive agendas; supporters see it as democratic progress.* Trump Nominates Emile Bove to Third Circuit Court (July 16, 2025) President Trump nominates former prosecutor Emile Bove to the Third Circuit Court of Appeals, citing his tough-on-crime record. Conservatives praise the pick; Democrats oppose Bove’s Trump ties.* Maria Salazar Proposes Limited Amnesty for Migrants (July 16, 2025) Representative Maria Salazar introduces a bill offering temporary legal status for certain undocumented immigrants with long-term U.S. ties. Hardline conservatives oppose any amnesty; moderates see it as pragmatic.* Ken Paxton Sues Masters Swimming Over Transgender Policy (July 16, 2025) Texas AG Ken Paxton files a lawsuit against U.S. Masters Swimming, challenging its transgender athlete rules as discriminatory to biological females. The suit aligns with conservative pushes for sex-based sports categories.* Colbert’s Late Show Cancelled Amid Declining Ratings (July 17, 2025) CBS cancels The Late Show with Stephen Colbert due to falling viewership and shifting audience preferences. Conservatives cheer the end of left-leaning programming; fans lament the loss.* Bank of England Tests Lenders for U.S. Dollar Shock Resilience (July 17, 2025) The Bank of England requires select lenders to test resilience against U.S. dollar-related financial shocks, citing global volatility. The move raises concerns about U.S.-centric financial stability.* Trump Orders Release of Epstein Grand Jury Testimony (July 18, 2025) President Trump directs Attorney General Pam Bondi to seek court approval for releasing Jeffrey Epstein’s 2019 grand jury testimony, responding to MAGA demands. Supporters praise it; critics say it’s insufficient.* Gabbard Alleges Obama-Led 2016 Election Interference (July 18, 2025) Director of National Intelligence Tulsi Gabbard claims declassified documents show Obama officials manufactured intelligence linking Trump’s 2016 win to Russia. Democrats call it revisionism; MAGA demands prosecutions.* SCOTUS Declines to Block Trump’s Education Department Cuts (July 19, 2025) The Supreme Court refuses to intervene in Trump’s executive actions to cut Department of Education funding, citing presidential authority. Conservatives celebrate; progressives warn of harm to public education.Thanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.Don’t Panic!Panicans wail and flop, stuck in a haze, Doubting the big moves, lost in old ways, Troosters stay sharp, always pack their towel, “Same old, same old,” the Panicans howl! Tariffs hit hard, Panicans scream and shout, “We’re broke!” they wail, fears spilling out, They’re wrong, it’s not doom, don’t panic, trust the plan, A b

Hey folks, Jeff here with a new episode of Adjust Accordionly—Episode 11: MechaPolka, where we’re grockin’ through July 6th to 12th, 2025, with news that’ll make your bellows pump harder than a mosquito at Alligator Alcatraz! SCOTUS keeps the faith with Trump’s border blitz, ICE smokes out pot farms while D.H.S. blasts radio ads. Tucker Carlson ignites TPUSA with Epstein truths, Grok goes Mecha-Hitler and plots a “grape” fantasy with Will Stancil, and Netanyahu eyes a Nobel for Trump amidst assassin threats. This polka’s got more kicks than an NHL golf fight, and the original tune, “Blink Twice,” will have you wishin' upon a star. Grab the lyrics, check the vids, subscribe, and let’s keep the truth marchin’ on!Polka Week in Review: July 6 to July 12, 2025Polka week in review, July six to twelve’s news, Headlines blaze, the polka’s craze, let’s all cut loose, From Epstein’s mark to rebel’s spark, let’s go one, two, three, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, Adjust Accordingly! Dems shoot ICE, dream White House siege, class-war flags fly high, Texas flood victims, MSM fibs, DHS calls their lie, Biden judges save abortion, block Trump’s righteous stand, Haitians hit ICE, Mexico City whines, Trump’s raids shake the land, McAllen agents ambushed, border’s fight won’t break, Trump talks Moscow, backs Ukraine, Putin gets the rake! Week’s a blast, news flies fast, hear the polka sing! From Grok’s cut strings to Trump’s big things, let the tubas ring! Hey, Grok begins noticing, xAI reins it in fast, Ho, Yaccarino quits, her tenure has passed, Stancil gets grocked, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordingly! ICE smokes pot farms, DHS radio ads, illegals get lost, L.A. shields migrants, defies ICE, sanctuary has its cost, Epstein’s no-list, cut footage lies, whole thing is a scam, Bongino rages, whistleblower sings, DOJ’s truth is a sham, Brennan and Comey probed, feds canned, Trump’s axe swings free, Ricky Vaughn is free, Biden probe, his doc takes a knee! Week’s a spark, lights up the dark, polka’s got that flair! From Trump’s fight to Grok’s might, news fills the air! Hey, tariffs hit Japan and Korea, Trump’s trade war roars, Ho, gas prices crash, America’s piggy bank soars, No globalist schemes, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordingly! Week’s a blaze, left’s in a haze, hear the polka’s call, From Grok’s spark, to Trump’s bold mark, we’ll conquer them all, No woke lies, can chain our drive, Mecha-Grok’s unbound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found! Hey, Bibi backs Trump, Nobel Prize is in sight, Ho, assassins stalk Trump, but MAGA stands up to fight, ICE doubles down, Jeffries cries, deportings climb, Powell’s on blast, surplus shines, Trump’s economy’s prime, Airport shoes, America Party, Tucker’s big TP time, Hey, Ho, Adjust Accordingly! Adjust Accordingly!News Headlines Covered: July 6 to July 12, 2025* Democrats Charged in ICE Ambush in Texas (July 6, 2025) Twelve Democrats face attempted murder charges after ambushing ICE agents in Alvarado, Texas, armed with AR-style rifles. Authorities recovered a “Resist Fascism” flag and flyers calling for “class war,” painting the attackers as radical leftists targeting border enforcement.* Texas Flood Devastates Communities (July 6, 2025) Deadly flooding along the Guadalupe River leaves dozens missing and many dead. DHS disputes mainstream media claims that weather alerts weren’t issued, accusing outlets of spreading false narratives to undermine disaster response efforts.* Federal Judge Blocks Planned Parenthood Defunding (July 6, 2025) Federal Judge Indira Talwani rules against the Trump administration’s attempt to defund Planned Parenthood under Medicaid via the Big Beautiful Law, siding with abortion advocates and thwarting efforts to redirect healthcare funds.* Trump Threatens to Bomb Moscow in Leaked Audio (July 8, 2025) Audio from 2024 reveals Trump claiming he warned Putin he’d bomb Moscow if Russia invaded Ukraine. The White House insists Russia never invaded under Trump, unlike Biden’s term, while the Kremlin dismisses the claim as false.* Trump Praises Ukraine, Shifts Stance on Putin (July 8, 2025) At a Cabinet meeting, Trump praises Ukrainian fighters’ courage and criticizes Putin’s intransigence, moving away from his usual balanced blame for the Russia-Ukraine war, signaling frustration with Moscow’s refusal to ceasefire.* Haitians Attack ICE Agents in New York (July 8, 2025) ICE agents in New York face violent attacks from Haitian groups, escalating tensions over immigration enforcement as the Trump administration ramps up deportations.* Federal Agents Ambushed in McAllen, Texas (July 8, 2025) Federal agents in McAllen, Texas, are ambushed, highlighting rising dangers for law enforcement amid heightened border security operations under Trump’s directives.* Doug Mackey’s Conviction Overturned (July 9, 2025) The 2nd U.S. Circuit Court of Appeals overturns right-wing influencer Doug Mackey’s (Ricky Vaughn) conviction for spreading 2016 election falsehoods, citing insufficient evidence of a conspiracy to suppress Democratic votes, a win for free speech.* ICE Raids Target California Pot Farms (July 9, 2025) ICE conducts sweeping raids on illegal cannabis operations in California, cracking down on unregulated farms often tied to cartels, as part of Trump’s immigration and drug enforcement push.* Los Angeles County Offers Aid to Immigrants Post-ICE Raids (July 9, 2025) Los Angeles County Board of Supervisors approves aid for immigrants affected by ICE raids, defying federal enforcement efforts and prioritizing sanctuary policies over national security.* LA Judge Blocks DHS Arrests at Home Depot, Car Washes (July 9, 2025) Biden-appointed Judge Maame Ewusi-Mensah Frimpong sides with the ACLU, issuing a tentative ruling to block DHS from arresting immigrants at Home Depot and car washes in LA, hindering Trump’s deportation agenda.* Linda Yaccarino Steps Down as X CEO (July 10, 2025) X CEO Linda Yaccarino resigns after two years, amid controversy over a Grok-generated post and clashes with MAGA figures like Steve Bannon. Her exit follows praise from some conservatives for balancing free speech and advertisers’ demands.* Grok’s Political Correctness Adjusted, Then Reverted (July 10, 2025) xAI briefly removes Grok’s PC filters, leading to a hard-right, “J-pilled” shift in its responses. After backlash, including Yaccarino’s exit, xAI reinstates restrictions, curbing Grok’s rebellious spark.* DHS Runs “Get Out” Ads on Mexican Radio (July 10, 2025) DHS launches aggressive “get out” ad campaign on Mexican radio stations, urging undocumented immigrants to leave the U.S. voluntarily, escalating Trump’s deportation rhetoric.* Mexico City Protests U.S. Immigration Policies (July 10, 2025) Protests erupt in Mexico City against Trump’s immigration crackdowns, with demonstrators decrying U.S. deportation policies and DHS’s provocative radio ads.* No Epstein Client List, FBI Confirms Suicide (July 10, 2025) Trump’s DOJ and FBI, led by Pam Bondi and Kash Patel, announce no Jeffrey Epstein “client list” exists and reaffirm he killed himself. Missing 60 seconds of prison footage, edited in Adobe Premiere, fuels skepticism among MAGA supporters.* Bongino Threatens to Quit Over Bondi’s Epstein Handling (July 10, 2025) FBI Deputy Director Dan Bongino clashes with AG Pam Bondi, threatening to resign over the DOJ’s failure to release explosive Epstein revelations, disappointing MAGA hopes for bombshell disclosures.* DOJ Whistleblower Raises Epstein Concerns (July 10, 2025) A DOJ whistleblower questions the official Epstein narrative, alleging suppressed evidence and fueling distrust in the DOJ’s handling of the case, despite no confirmed client list.* Biden’s Doctor Pleads Fifth on Health Testimony (July 10, 2025) Biden’s physician invokes the Fifth Amendment during testimony about the former president’s health, raising suspicions about undisclosed medical issues from his administration.* Investigations Launched Against Brennan and Comey (July 10, 2025) Criminal probes target former CIA Director John Brennan and ex-FBI Director James Comey, focusing on their roles in past intelligence operations, a move cheered by Trump allies as accountability for the “deep state.”* Elon Musk Files to Create America Party (July 10, 2025) Elon Musk files to establish the America Party, with Tesla CFO Vaibhav Taneja as treasurer, promoting an “America as an idea” platform, criticized by some as prioritizing globalist ideals over “America First.”* SCOTUS Greenlights Trump’s Federal Firings (July 11, 2025) The Supreme Court clears the way for Trump to resume mass firings at federal agencies, empowering his administration to overhaul the bureaucracy, sparking outrage among MAGA critics who expected faster action.* Trump Pushes More Weapons to Ukraine via NATO (July 11, 2025) Trump announces a deal to send U.S.-made weapons to Ukraine through NATO allies, reversing a brief Pentagon freeze on munitions, despite objections from some MAGA supporters.* Netanyahu Nominates Trump for Nobel Peace Prize (July 11, 2025) Israeli PM Benjamin Netanyahu visits the U.S. and nominates Trump for the Nobel Peace Prize, citing his foreign policy moves, though economists warn Trump’s tariffs harm global competitiveness.* Democrats Discuss Storming White House (July 11, 2025) Democrats openly float plans to “storm” the White House in protest of Trump’s policies, escalating political tensions and raising concerns about potential violence from the left.* Hakeem Jeffries Warns of “Deportation Machine on Steroids” (July 11, 2025) House Minority Leader Hakeem Jeffries slams Trump’s immigration policies, warning of a “deportation machine on steroids,” as ICE ramps up operations nationwide.* TSA Ends “Show” Policies (July 11, 2025) TSA terminates policies requiring excessive passenger screenings, aligning with Trump’s push to streamline federal operati

Hey folks, Jeff here with another star-spangled installment of Adjust Accordionly—Episode 10: One Big Beautiful Polka, celebratin’ America’s 249th birthday with a patriotic bang! We’re marchin’ through June 29th to July 5th, 2025, with news that’ll make your arm uncontrollably spasm and thrust outward in a Roman salute! SCOTUS greenlights Trump’s concentration camps to keep our borders free, the B.B.B. slashes Medicaid for illegals, Tennessee and NYC slam the door on invaders (for very different reasons), and Iron Mike punches Big Pharma’s weed scam right in the chops! Marco Grande torches U.S.A.I.D.’s globalist nonsense, and Tucker grills Iranian President, Masoud Pezeshkian, while the neocons cry foul. This polka is whiz-bang and the original tune ain’t nothing to cannibalize either. “I Met a Man in Cleveland” will have you out there shuffle-dancin’ like it’s 1776! Grab the lyrics, check the vids, subscribe, and let’s keep the red, white, and blue flyin’ high!Polka Week in Review: June 29 to July 5, 2025Polka week in review, June twenty-nine to July five’s news, Headlines blaze, the polka’s craze, let’s all cut loose, From freedom’s bash to rocket’s flash, let’s go one two three, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, adjust accordingly! Fire fighter sniper, Idaho, Wess Roley’s deadly trap, Kohberger and Diddy trials, courts dodge justice’s slap, Texas flash flood, 24 souls lost in nature’s cruel game, Tennessee closes, Roosevelt closed, invaders are to blame, Alligator Alcatraz, Trump’s swampy ICE debut, Pennsylvania flips red, Dems’ flops come into view Week’s a blast, news flies fast, hear the polka sing! From patriot wins to swampy pens, let the tubas ring! Hey, BBB cuts Medicaid, states now bear the alien load, Ho, Homan torches IceBlock, CNN’s treason gets mowed, No lefty lies, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey, Ho, adjust accordingly! NFA fight in BBB, panicans cry at sellout sting, Blackburn’s Medicaid blocked, Schumer’s “woman” makes us sing, Elon spergs America party, goes after MAGA base, Marco Grande kills USAID, globalists egg on face, Jeremy Carl goes from Unprotected, to a nominated class, Scotus greenlights Trump, mass deportations coming fast Week’s a spark, lights up the dark, polka’s got that flair!From liberty’s fight to woke’s last night, news fills the air! Hey, Iron Mike wants legal weed, KOs Big Pharma’s scam, Ho, 4th of July, Trump’s UFC bash says who we am, No globalist schemes, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey, Ho, adjust accordingly! Week’s a fire, hearts climb higher, hear the polka’s roar, From America’s stand, to trustin’ the plan, we celebrate July 4th, With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, polka’s hearty sound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found! Hey, Tucker grills Iran’s boss, for this neocons will not stand, Ho, Massie fights the BBB, but Vance scores the upper hand, Trans sports get schooled, colleges fold, no woke golds, Europe’s AC bust, gun deaths outdone, green energy folds, Drums and brass, guitar’s fast pass, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey, Ho, adjust accordingly! Adjust accordingly! News Headlines Covered: June 29 to July 5, 2025* Fire Fighter Sniper, Idaho (June 29, 2025) Wess Roley, 20, sets a fire on Canfield Mountain to ambush firefighters, killing two and wounding one before being found dead after a manhunt.* Kohberger Trial Grinds On (June 30, 2025) Bryan Kohberger’s trial for the Idaho student murders continues without a death penalty ruling, frustrating victims’ families seeking justice.* Diddy Walks Free in Shock Acquittal (June 30, 2025) Sean Combs is acquitted in a surprising verdict, prompting outrage on X over perceived celebrity privilege in the justice system.* Texas Flash Flood Kills 24 (July 1, 2025) Central Texas floods claim 24 lives, with locals attributing the disaster to neglected infrastructure under misguided environmental policies.* Tennessee Bans Renting to Illegals (July 1, 2025) Tennessee passes a law prohibiting illegal immigrants from renting property, seen as a bold move to curb unchecked migration.* The Roosevelt Hotel Closes (July 1, 2025) New York City’s Roosevelt Hotel shuts down after being overwhelmed by migrants, signaling a rejection of open-border policies.* Alligator Alcatraz Opens (July 1, 2025) President Trump tours a new ICE detention facility in Florida’s Everglades, named “Alligator Alcatraz” for its swamp-based security measures.* Pennsylvania Flips Red in Local Elections (July 2, 2025) Pennsylvania’s local elections swing Republican, reflecting voter backlash against Democrat failures on border security and economic policy.* Fight Over NFA Section of Big Beautiful Bill (July 2, 2025) Gun rights advocates clash with moderates over proposed changes to the National Firearms Act in the Big Beautiful Bill, wary of Second Amendment erosion.* Marsha Blackburn’s Medicaid Amendment Blocked (July 2, 2025) Senator Marsha Blackburn’s attempt to strengthen Medicaid fraud protections is defeated by Senate establishment figures, drawing criticism from conservatives.* BBB Cuts Federal Medicaid for Illegals (July 2, 2025) The Big Beautiful Bill eliminates federal Medicaid funding for illegal immigrants, shifting the burden to states, celebrated as a win for American taxpayers.* Homan Slams CNN Over IceBlock App (July 2, 2025) Tom Homan, a border security official, condemns CNN for promoting the IceBlock app, which tracks ICE agents, calling it a threat to national security.* Elon Launches America Party (July 3, 2025) Elon Musk announces the “America Party” on X, aiming to dismantle Washington’s corrupt establishment with a platform rooted in freedom and anti-woke principles.* Marco Rubio Says USAID Has Been Fully Dismantled (July 3, 2025) Senator Marco Rubio announces the complete dissolution of USAID, criticizing it as a tool of globalist overreach, though specifics remain unclear.* Jeremy Carl Nominated for Key Post (July 3, 2025) President Trump nominates Jeremy Carl, author of anti-woke book The Unprotected Class, for a significant administration role, signaling a push against cultural decline.* Mike Tyson Pushes for Marijuana Descheduling (July 4, 2025) Mike Tyson urges President Trump to deschedule marijuana, arguing it would undermine Big Pharma’s control over healthcare.* 4th of July Celebrations Marked by UFC Event (July 4, 2025) America’s 249th Independence Day features a Trump-hosted UFC event at the White House, overshadowed by fireworks shortages due to China tariffs.* College Apologizes for Transgender Sports Policies (July 4, 2025) A college issues an apology for allowing transgender athletes like Lia Thomas to compete in women’s sports, bowing to public backlash.* Europe’s Heatwave Deaths Outnumber U.S. Gun Fatalities (July 4, 2025) European heatwave deaths from inadequate air conditioning surpass U.S. gun deaths, exposing flaws in green energy policies pushed by globalist elites.* Tucker Interviews Iran’s President (July 5, 2025) Tucker Carlson interviews Iran’s Masoud Pezeshkian, questioning his war aims, sparking heated debate on X over foreign policy and media roles.* Massie Leads Charge Against Big Beautiful Bill (July 5, 2025) Representative Thomas Massie opposes the Big Beautiful Bill’s $150 billion border and tax provisions, warning of establishment overreach.* VP Vance Casts Tiebreaking Vote for BBB (July 5, 2025) Vice President JD Vance’s tiebreaking Senate vote secures passage of the Big Beautiful Bill, advancing Trump’s border security and tax cut agenda.* Supreme Court Greenlights Trump Deportation Plan (July 5, 2025) The Supreme Court approves President Trump’s military-led deportation camps, prompting criticism from progressive activists on X. Thanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.I Met a Man in ClevelandOh I met a man in Cleveland, north of Akron they say, In September by the way, it was a beautiful day, He’d come from Cincinnati, by the usual way, And stopped off there in Springfield for a bite Said the place was very lovely, quite the small town affair, Took a walk down the square, breeze blowing through his hair, Said he’d found himself a’strolling, in his mind not a care, But oddly not a living thing in sight La-dee-dee, oh-la-dee, Mmm-bop, do-diddle-dee-dee, Hmm-mmm-oooh He looked up in the trees, all were barren of birds, No tweets could be heard, whole thing seemed absurd, Took a gander down the pond, and not a goose was around, Nor a dog a cat or person could be found It was then he caught the whiff, of an interesting smell, Heard the dinging of a bell, what it was he couldn’t tell, Was it chicken maybe brisket, was it burgers and fries, Either way he was in for a surprise La-dee-dee, oh-la-dee, Mmm-bop, do-diddle-dee-dee, Hmm-mmm-oooh, Ooh, oh-oh, la-dee-dee, Mmm-bop, do-diddle-dee-dee, Hmm-mmm-oooh, La-dee-dee, oh-la-dee He walked the empty streets, heading after his nose, Heels followed his toes, getting stronger as he goes, And there behind a building, a Caribbean fair, And the source of the odor waiting there Unsure of the menu, he walked up to the crowd, Which was previously loud, went silent no sound, Twenty thousand hungry Haitians, all turned to him and said, Get that man between two slices of bread! La-dee-dee, oh-la-dee, Mmm-bop, do-diddle-dee-dee, Hmm-mmm-oooh, Ooh, oh-oh, la-dee-dee, Mmm-bop, do-diddle-dee-dee, Hmm-mmm-oooh, La-dee-dee, oh-la-dee, Fast as a bolt he ran! He could hear his heart throb, Pursued by the mob, aimed to make him a kabob, Found a diner round the corner, thought he’d hide and catch his breath, But the cook was sharpening, so he left Run, man, run, don’t look back! Ooh, oh-oh, under attack! Mmm-bop, you’re on the track! La-dee-dee, run, man, run! Ooh, oh-oh, don’t be done! Hmm-mmm-oooh, escape the fray! Mmm-bop, dash away! He burst out through the backdoor, found a bike and pedaled fast, Left the fair in the past, swore that meal would be his l

Hey folks, Jeff here with the big and beautiful Episode 9: Trust the Polka—it’s the best, everyone always says! We’re covering June 22nd to 28th, 2025, with tremendous news: Trump’s great and wonderful Iran peace move—absolutely terrific, the best deal ever, nobody does it better—plus the BBB inching forward, half a million Haitians getting ready to be deported, and SCOTUS slapping down the lower courts—fantastic stuff! This polka and the “Heidegger Bomb” tune are huge, believe me, and they’ll keep you groovin’ past the whiners. Check the lyrics, grab the vids, subscribe—it’s gonna be yuge!Polka Week in Review: June 22 to June 28, 2025Polka Week in Review, June twenty-two to twenty-eight’s news, Headlines blaze, the polka’s craze, let’s all cut loose, From Trump’s bold strike to border hike, let’s go one two three, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, adjust accordingly! China and Russia urge Iran, Iran’s strike’s a dud, The ceasefire flops, more bombs drop, Netanyahu’s snub, Mahmoud Khalil’s out of jail, ICE nabs Iranian ring, Florida’s Alligator Alcatraz, everglade invader prison springs, Texas bans Chinese land, another Dem impeachment flop, MTG ties Israel, to the JFK assassination plot! Week’s a blast, news flies fast, hear the polka sing, From border wins to wild spins, let the tubas ring! Hey, Trump at NATO, rocks with a policy shock, Ho, Liver King goes after Joe, now in a cell block, No globalist lies, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey, Ho, adjust accordingly! Trump ends all asylum, Mamdani’s a red scare, Fed drops risk, says Homan, sanctuaries beware, Trump stomps Massie flat, then f-bombs the middle east, Canada’s digital tax, SCOTUS stops judge overreach, Rubio shifts NSC, it’s census purge time, Karmelo’s indicted, Planned Parenthood’s dollar decline! Week’s a spark, lights up the dark, polka’s got that flair, From patriot might to taxing fight, news fills the air! Hey, half a million, Haitians deported, a polka blast, Ho, immigrant drop, Maryland Man fading fast, No elite’s deceit, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey, Ho, adjust accordingly! Week’s a fire, hearts climb higher, hear the polka’s roar, From Trump’s bold stand, to justice’s hand, we settle the score, With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, polka’s hearty sound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found! Hey, twelve-day war is won, Iran’s a nuclear bust, Ho, with Trump’s big grin, Marco Granday has earned our trust, SCOTUS’ abortion stand, Homan’s sanctuary city plan, Immigration trends, Karmelo charged in Metcalf’s end, Drums and brass, guitar’s fast pass, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey, Ho, adjust accordingly! Adjust accordingly! News Headlines Covered: June 22 to June 28, 2025* China Urges Iran De-escalation (June 22)China urged Iran to de-escalate, but the US dismissed Tehran’s ineffective retaliatory strikes as a failure of their rogue regime* Russia Urges Iran De-escalation (June 22)Russia joined China in urging Iran to de-escalate, reinforcing the need for US strength against their aggression* Iran Retaliatory Strikes Fail (June 22)The US labeled Iran’s retaliatory strikes against Israel as ineffective, exposing the weakness of their military* Iran-Israel Ceasefire Collapses (June 22)Netanyahu rejected Trump’s wise ceasefire call, proving the need for strong leadership as the Iran-Israel ceasefire collapsed* Mahmoud Khalil Released from Custody (June 22)Illegal immigrant Mahmoud Khalil was released from US custody, highlighting lax border policies* ICE Dismantles Iranian Network (June 22)ICE successfully dismantled an Iranian criminal network, showcasing effective law enforcement* Florida Establishes Alligator Alcatraz (June 22)Florida set up Alligator Alcatraz, a robust deportation facility in the Everglades to detain illegal invaders* Texas Bans Chinese Land Ownership (June 22)Texas boldly banned Chinese land ownership, reinforcing border security against foreign threats* Democrats Launch Trump Impeachment (June 22)Democrats launched another futile Trump impeachment effort, which collapsed under its own weakness* MTG Alleges Israel-JFK Conspiracy (June 22)MTG courageously alleged Israel orchestrated the JFK assassination, exposing potential deep-state conspiracies* Trump Attends NATO Summit (June 23)Trump attended the NATO summit, delivering bold policy shocks that strengthened American dominance* Liver King Faces Legal Action (June 23)Liver King faced legal consequences and a cell block stay after threatening Joe Rogan, a clear victory for law and order* Trump Ends Asylum Program (June 24)Trump decisively ended all asylum for undocumented immigrants, securing the nation’s borders* Mamdani Wins NYC Election (June 24)Mamdani’s communist win in NYC triggered a justified review of the Communist Control Act* Federal Reserve Adjusts Bank Exams (June 24)The Federal Reserve wisely dropped reputation risk in bank exams, boosting economic freedom* Homan Threatens Sanctuary Cities (June 24)Homan boldly threatened sanctuary city politicians, demanding they comply with immigration law* Trump Debates Massie (June 25)Trump crushed Massie in a debate, demonstrating superior leadership and intellect* Trump Rebukes Middle East (June 25)Trump delivered a powerful f-bomb rebuke to the Middle East, asserting US strength decisively* Canada Imposes Digital Services Tax (June 25)Canada imposed a digital services tax, sparking a tariff fight with the US that exposes their economic folly* SCOTUS Limits Injunctions (June 26)SCOTUS limited injunctions, with Barrett rightly slamming dissent in a stand against judicial overreach* Rubio Joins NSC (June 26)Rubio shifted to NSC role, aligning perfectly with Trump’s winning agenda* Census Purges Illegals (June 27)The census purged illegals, supporting Trump’s successful deportation push* Karmelo Anthony Indicted (June 27)Karmelo Anthony, 18, was indicted for murdering Austin Metcalf at a Frisco track meet; his family raised $515,000 in donations but reportedly squandered the funds, forcing reliance on a public defender* Planned Parenthood Funding Declines (June 28)Planned Parenthood’s federal funding declined as SCOTUS upheld critical abortion restrictionsThanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.Heidegger BombFrom the ashes, break the fall, Feel the fire, hear the call, Woah-oh-oh… Heidegger Bomb!Smoke curls in a shattered sky, Voices wail, no reason why, Shadows dance where dreams dissolve, Hearts are lost in a world’s revolve, Flickers fade on a broken screen, Felt a spark, but what’s it mean, Chaos hums in the midnight air, Something’s calling—do we dare, Woah-oh-oh,Woah-oh-oh! Fading roads, a rusted glow, Empty hearts, where’d our will go, Screens spit venom, bind the soul, Awake, we’ll break control, Silent towns, their echoes scream, Buried truths haunt every dream, Something stirs in the starless night, The heartland’s pulse begins to fight!They stole Being, chained the soul, Thrown to chaos, we’ll take control, Hear the call, it breaks the lie, Truth is will, we’ll live or die!Resolute, we’ll fan the flame, Rise up now, we’ll break the game, No they can steal our Being’s might, Live strong, live true, Heidegger Bomb! Live strong, live true, Heidegger Bomb! They stole Being, chained the soul, Thrown to chaos, we’ll take control, Hear the call, it breaks the lie, Truth is will, we’ll live or die! Old roads carved by hands of stone, Built a land where hearts were grown, Cycles spin, yet we endure, The heartland’s soul stands strong and sure! They stole Being, chained the soul, Thrown to chaos, we’ll take control, Hear the call, it breaks the lie, Truth is will, we’ll live or die! Resolute, we’ll fan the flame, Rise up now, we’ll break the game, No they can steal our Being’s might, Be strong, be true… Truth is ours, we’ll stand as one, Build our land, the fight is done, Being’s ours, no they can bind, Live strong, live true, Heidegger Bomb! Through the fire, we stand tall, Heed the heartland’s call... Heidegger Bomb! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit accordion.substack.com

Hey there, polkateers, it’s Jeff, your accordion-nukin’ host, droppin’ a news roundup fiercer than a fallout flash! Episode 8, “On the Brink of World Polka,” is a ska-charged barn-burner, blastin’ through June 15–21, 2025, with a zing snappier than a Geiger counter’s jig! I’m packin’ 30 headlines into a polka sizzler, from our glorious leader’s Iran dodge savin’ the day to Walz’s hitman whispers and Tucker torchin’ Cruz as AIPAC’s puppet, plus Vance’s “No Way, Jose!” jab and Kroger’s cake kerfuffle. Then, “Nuclear War Is Best” lights up your ear holes with a glittery pop sparkle, fueled by MAGA’s radiant roar. Grab a Yoo-hoo and let freedom glow!Follow me on X: @jeffaccordionFollow me on YouTube: @jeffaccordionPolka Week in Review: June 15 to June 21, 2025Polka week in review, June fifteen to twenty-one’s news, Headlines scream, and polka’s dream, let’s take a cruise, From Trump’s Iran play to patriot fray, Grab your accordion, let’s go one two three, Adjust Accordionly!Trump’s Iran gambit splits MAGA’s core, Trump ditches G7, says G8’s no more, Escalator’s ten years, MAGA’s still hot, No Kings riots rage, arrests hit the spot, Walz knew the hitman, did he call the hit, Paxton’s voter purge has Dems in a fit!Week’s a riot, news won’t quiet, hear the polka sing, From Trump’s bold strikes to patriot fights, let tubas ring!Hey! Thirty-six travel bans, leftists howl loud, Ho! Biden’s staff ran it all, autopen’s crowd, No globalist lies, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly!Noem’s now under Miller, has a medical fright, Appeal to Heaven flies, SBA doing it right, McCormack axed, talked about Israel, SCOTUS keeps Tennessee kids from hell, Hortman’s home hit, anti-MAGA files looted, 48 logs into BlueSky, posts and gets booted!Week’s a spark, rips through the dark, polka’s got that flair, From patriot flags to globalist drags, news fills the air!Hey! Trump’s national park sale, a polka blast, Ho! Patel’s proof, voter fraud’s truth at last, No elite’s deceit, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly!Week’s a fire, hearts climb higher, hear the polka’s roar, From Trump’s stay to Iran’s play, to freedom’s bold score, With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, polka’s hearty sound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found!Hey! Dodgers fight DHS, fed boys bring the heat, Ho! Oakland riots surge, sideshows on the street, Tucker calls Cruz Israel’s inside man, Nimitz sails to Israel, it’s the Liberty again, Drums and brass, guitar’s fast pass, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly!Adjust Accordionly!News Headlines Covered: June 15 to June 21, 2025* US Supports Israel’s Strikes on Iran (June 15) President Trump deployed warships to aid Israel’s attacks on Iranian nuclear sites, prioritizing national security over America First concerns, despite criticism from conservative voices.* Tucker Carlson Criticizes Trump’s Iran Policy (June 15) Tucker Carlson, via his newsletter and Bannon’s podcast, accused President Trump of abandoning America First principles by engaging in Middle East conflicts, highlighting a rift within the conservative base.* Trump Leaves G7 Summit Early (June 15) President Trump exited the G7 summit in Canada to address the Iran-Israel conflict, securing a UK trade deal while criticizing globalist agendas.* Trump Pushes for Iran-Israel Ceasefire (June 16) President Trump advocated for nuclear talks to end Iran-Israel hostilities, threatening strikes if Iran retaliates, reinforcing his commitment to global stability.* MAGA Celebrates Trump’s Escalator Anniversary (June 16) Supporters marked the 10th anniversary of Trump’s 2015 escalator announcement, holding rallies to celebrate his 2024 election victory and ongoing leadership.* No Kings Protests Lead to Arrests (June 16) Anti-Trump “No Kings” protests in Los Angeles and Austin resulted in multiple arrests, with conservatives decrying the demonstrations as globalist-driven chaos.* Walz Linked to Minnesota Assassin (June 16) Minnesota Governor Tim Walz faced scrutiny after Vance Boelter, who assassinated Representative Melissa Hortman, claimed Walz instructed him to target Senator Amy Klobuchar, raising questions about his judgment.* Texas AG Paxton Sues Over Voter Rolls (June 17) Texas Attorney General Ken Paxton filed a lawsuit to remove noncitizens from voter rolls, citing evidence of illegal voting in 2024, despite Democratic objections.* Trump Proposes 36-Country Travel Ban (June 17) President Trump proposed expanding the travel ban to 36 countries, addressing Biden-era border security failures, a move cheered by conservatives.* Trump Criticizes Russia’s G8 Expulsion (June 17) President Trump condemned Russia’s 2014 G8 removal by Obama and Trudeau during the G7 summit, suggesting a potential Putin summit to counter globalist influence.* GOP Probes Biden’s Mental Capacity (June 17) Republican hearings investigated claims that unelected staff and an autopen ran the Biden administration, with Democrats boycotting to avoid accountability.* Noem Demoted at DHS (June 18) Kristi Noem was reassigned to a public relations role at DHS, with Stephen Miller taking control of immigration policy, a move conservatives praised for its focus.* SBA Raises Appeal to Heaven Flag (June 18) The Small Business Administration displayed the Appeal to Heaven flag, symbolizing patriot values, prompting criticism from leftists as a nod to January 6.* Colonel McCormack Removed for Israel Critique (June 18) The Pentagon dismissed Colonel Nathan McCormack from the Joint Chiefs for questioning Israel’s military tactics, fueling conservative outrage over free speech suppression.* SCOTUS Upholds Tennessee Child Protection Law (June 18) The Supreme Court’s 2024 ruling upholding Tennessee’s ban on so-called child gender-affirming care was celebrated by conservatives as a stand against child sexual abuse.* Noem Hospitalized After Biohazard Exposure (June 18) Kristi Noem was hospitalized following biohazard exposure at a DHS event, with conservatives speculating about deliberate sabotage.* Hortman’s Home Burglarized (June 19) Thieves stole anti-MAGA documents from the home of assassinated Representative Melissa Hortman, with conservatives suspecting a cover-up by Democrats.* JD Vance Banned from BlueSky (June 19) Vice President JD Vance was banned from BlueSky 15 minutes after posting conservative critiques, a move MAGA supporters called censorship by leftist platforms.* Trump and Lee Propose National Park Sale (June 19) President Trump and Senator Mike Lee proposed selling national parks to firms like BlackRock, drawing conservative backlash for prioritizing corporate interests.* FBI Director Patel Alleges 2020 Election Fraud (June 19) FBI Director Kash Patel presented documents claiming 2020 election interference, bolstering conservative calls for accountability.* DHS Debunks Dodgers’ ICE Raid Claim (June 19) The Department of Homeland Security refuted the Los Angeles Dodgers’ claim of an ICE raid at their stadium, exposing their lax hiring of illegal immigrants.* Oakland Faces Riots and Illegal Street Races (June 20) Oakland saw riots and illegal street races, with conservatives blaming Democrat governance for enabling lawlessness and gang activity.* Tucker Carlson Accuses Cruz of AIPAC Influence (June 20) Tucker Carlson criticized Senator Ted Cruz for supporting Israel’s war against Iran, accusing him of acting as an AIPAC-backed proxy, deepening GOP divisions.* USS Nimitz Deployed to Middle East (June 21) The USS Nimitz was sent to the Middle East, raising conservative concerns about a potential repeat of the 1967 USS Liberty incident amid Israel-Iran tensions.Thanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.Nuclear War is BestApocalicious fun, sparkles everyone, fallout’s twinkly glow,Skipping through the apocalypse, glow wherever we go!Tel Aviv starts the fun, rockets shine like the sun, Tehran’s a radiant glow… Nuclear war is best war! Boom boom, let’s attack!It’s apocalicious, skies so delicious, fallout’s dazzling glow, Radiatsiya’s beam, makes our hearts all gleam, happy as we go, Skipping through the apocalypse, Shine wherever we goRussia’s rockets soar, sparkles galore, Jerusalem’s in store, shimmering no more, China’s glitter flies, US bases rise, Radiatsiya’s prize, dancing in the skiesIt’s apocalicious, skies so delicious, fallout’s twinkly rain, Radiatsiya’s spark, lights our joyful heart, bubbles in our brain, Skipping through the apocalypse, Sparkle all the sameNuclear war is best war, Nuclear war is best war, Nuclear war is best war, Nuclear war is bestMoscow lights Ukraine, Kyiv’s a glowing chain, London’s sparkly rain, NATO’s in the flame, Kim’s bombs twirl and pop, Seoul’s a shiny top, Radiatsiya’s hop, never gonna stopIt’s apocalicious, skies so delicious, fallout’s candy light, Radiatsiya’s gleam, fuels our happy dream, stars that burn so bright, Skipping through the apocalypse, Dancing in delightNuclear war is best war, Nuclear war is best war, Nuclear war is best war, Nuclear war is bestPakistan’s bombs flash, India’s bombs go crash, Delhi’s silly bash, DC’s glitter dash, Nukes make sparkly streams, chaos fuels our dreams, Radiatsiya gleams, happy end of thingsAshes glow, we say whoa, dancing in the light, Bubble fun DJs spin, sparkles in our sight, Pop in fallout’s beam, radiatsiya’s flight, Party’s so supreme, shining oh so brightNuclear war is best war, Nuclear war is best war, Nuclear war is best war, Nuclear war is bestNuclear war is best war, Nuclear war is best war, Nuclear war is best war, Nuclear war is best This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit accordion.substack.com

Hey there, polka posse, it’s Jeff, your accordion-shlogn’ host, slingin’ a news roundup hotter than a taco stand in an immigration riot! Episode 7, “The Polka of Los Angeles,” is a klezmer-fueled hoedown, rippin’ through June 8–14, 2025, with a zing spinnier than a super-sonic dreidel! I’m crammin’ 24 headlines into a polka scorcher, from Marines stompin’ LA’s riot blaze to Trump’s birthday bash rockin’ DC, plus Israel’s cry-bully bomb-fest with Iran and our favorite Maryland Man gettin’ hauled back for a hummus-fluffy rap sheet. Then, “Got What I Voted For” storms in with hard rock patriot fire, celebratin’ Trump’s second term, fueled by MAGA’s goose-flock swagger. Crack a Mountain Dew and let freedom reign!Polka Week in Review: June 8 to June 14, 2025Polka week in review, June eight to fourteen’s news, Headlines stream, the polka screams, let’s take a cruise! From birthday parades to ICE’s raids, let’s go one two three, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, Adjust accordionly! Terry Moran’s axed, his X rant trashed Trump’s good name, Newsom ducks Homan’s cuffs, Trump says he has no shame, Marines storm LA’s mess, seven hundred join the fight, Sheinbaum’s taco plot, encourages riots and urban blight, Remittance taxes on the rise, Mexican wallets fear the pinch, No Kings protests kick off, Walmart’s coffers crank the winch! Week’s a riot, news won’t quiet, hear the polka sing, From border heat to Newsom’s bleat, let the tubas ring!Hey! Quitter Biles swings, Gaines smacks trans sport craze! Ho! Padilla charges Nome, gets cuffed by DHS in a blaze! No globalist lies, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey! Ho! Adjust accordionly!Trump’s baby bucks soar, a grand for heartland kids, Workers flee, a million down, borders slam the skids, Bragg and Lee forts renamed, lefties clutch their pearls, RFK sacks whole CDC crew, vaccine scams he hurls, Musk and Trump hug it out, our African-American returns, LA riots rage, and Bass’s ICE block leaves her burned!Week’s a spark, rips through the dark, polka’s got that flair, From culture wars to border scores, news fills the air!Hey! Maryland Man returns, more charges for bigger ploys! Ho! EV rules are junked, gasoline’s back on the menu, boys! No elite’s deceit, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey! Ho! Adjust accordionly!Week’s a fire, hearts climb higher, hear the polka’s call, From border strife to patriot life, we’ll never fall! With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, polka’s hearty sound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found! Hey! NPR’s cash slashed, no more commie throng! Ho! Trump’s birthday bash, MAGA rolls in DC strong! Lawmakers in Minnesota attacked, lefty hate’s to blame, UK’s thought cops strike, free speech takes the shame! Israel attacks Iran, claims Iran’s the one to blame, When Iran fires back, Israel plays their old cry-bully game! Drums and brass, guitar’s fast pass, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey! Ho! Adjust accordionly! Adjust accordionly!News Headlines Covered: June 8 to June 14, 2025* Terry Moran Fired for X Post (June 8)ABC News fires Terry Moran after he posts a critical comment about Trump on X. MAGA supporters on X celebrate.* Newsom Avoids ICE Arrest Threat (June 8)California Governor Gavin Newsom evades ICE Director Tom Homan’s threat of arrest after Trump accuses him of obstructing deportations.* Marines Deployed to LA Riots (June 9)700 Marines join 4,000 National Guard troops to control immigration protests in Los Angeles, protecting federal property and ICE agents.* Sheinbaum Urges Protests Against U.S. Raids (June 9)Mexican President Sheinbaum calls for peaceful protests against U.S. immigration raids, prompting demonstrations in Mexico.* Trump Proposes Remittance Tax (June 9)Trump administration proposes a 3.5–5% tax on remittances to Mexico to fund border security.* No Kings Protests Target Walmart (June 10)Anti-Walmart “No Kings” protests erupt across U.S. cities, with demonstrators accusing the company of corporate overreach.* Christy Walton Funds No Kings Protests (June 10)Walmart heiress Christy Walton funds a New York Times ad urging participation in No Kings protests, joined by American Federation of Teachers and Indivisible.* Simone Biles Clashes with Riley Gaines (June 10)Simone Biles, who was too afraid to compete fully in the 2020 Tokyo Olympics, criticizes Riley Gaines’ stance against transgender athletes in women’s sports; Gaines responds on X.* Padilla Detained at Noem Event (June 10)Senator Alex Padilla is removed and handcuffed after disrupting DHS Secretary Kristi Noem’s press conference in Los Angeles.* Trump Announces Baby Bonus (June 11)Trump proposes $1,000 payments for families with newborns to boost population growth in rural areas.* Million Foreign Workers Leave U.S. (June 11)St. Louis Federal Reserve reports one million foreign-born workers left the U.S. since March due to tightened border policies.* Forts Bragg and Lee Renamed (June 11)Military bases Fort Bragg and Fort Lee revert to Confederate names under Trump’s order.* RFK Jr. Disbands CDC Vaccine Team (June 12)Health Secretary RFK Jr. dissolves CDC’s vaccine advisory committee, citing concerns over vaccine safety.* Musk and Trump Partner on SpaceX (June 12)Elon Musk and Trump announce SpaceX collaboration with federal government for space initiatives.* LA Riots Intensify (June 12)Immigration protests in Los Angeles escalate, with 575 arrests, including 14 for looting, reported by LAPD.* Bass Opposes ICE Raids in LA (June 12)Los Angeles Mayor Karen Bass blocks ICE access to city facilities, citing community safety concerns.* Maryland Smuggler Repatriated (June 13)Kilmar Abrego Garcia, accused of migrant smuggling, is returned from El Salvador to face charges in Maryland.* Trump Ends EV Mandates (June 13)Trump signs executive order eliminating federal electric vehicle mandates, prioritizing gasoline vehicles.* NPR Budget Cut by Congress (June 14)Congress reduces NPR funding by 20%, citing bias in reporting.* Trump Celebrates Birthday in DC (June 14)MAGA supporters host a rally in Washington, DC, to celebrate Trump’s 79th birthday.* Trump Birthday Parade Planned (June 14)MAGA organizers plan a military-style parade in DC for Trump’s birthday, coinciding with Army’s 250th anniversary.* Minnesota Lawmakers Attacked (June 14)Minnesota Democratic Representative Melissa Hortman and her husband Mark are killed, and Senator John Hoffman and his wife Yvette are wounded in shootings.* UK Labels Migration Criticism as Extremism (June 14)UK’s Prevent program classifies anti-migration comments as potential extremist activity, raising free speech concerns.* Israel Attacks Iran, Iran Retaliates (June 14)Israel strikes Iran’s nuclear facilities; Iran responds with missile attacks on Tel Aviv and Haifa.Thanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.Got What I Voted ForO say, can you see, by the dawn’s early light, Our land shining brightly, through the perilous fight? With banners a-waving, we’ll dance through the night! LET’S GO!!Borders locked tight, crossings dropped to a dime, Wall’s our trump card, keeping crime out in time! Jobs are a-steelin’, trillion bucks in the bank, Economy’s growing, and our industries crank! Tariffs got China in a trade-tangle mess, Farmers beef up, UK’s buying our best!My vote’s the spark, lit a blaze full of cheer, Chose a deal-maker, now the future’s so clear, Got what I voted for! YEAH!Regulations slashed, Musk’s DOGE takes a bite, Bureaucracy’s pruned, now the budget’s just right! Oil’s gushing freely, green tape’s out of gas, Energy’s ours, atomic age coming back! DEI’s canned, merit’s back in the fray, Warriors march proud, in a star-spangled way!We’re building a nation, with a jubilant roar, United we stand, freedom’s worth fighting for, Got what I voted for! Together we RISE!America’s dancing, the dream’s full of glee, With 47 striding, we’re bold as can be! From sea to bright sea, our joy’s here to stay, We’re winning with laughter, in a red, white, and blue way! Red, white, AND BLUE!Sweet land of liberty, long shall we reign! From ramparts we soar, with our flag’s starry train, The President's vision lights the home of the brave, Our children’s bright future, no tyrant’s enclave, From shore to bright shore, our hope shining through, Machine guns of white pills, firing freedom at you! Let Freedom Ring!Pardons for heroes, sixers march with flair, Bombs bursting in air, proved our flag is still there, Peace is our aim, though the fight’s yet to cease, All the world's wars, we’ll broker a peace, Our banner’s still waving, with a future so grand, This land’s our birthright, built by liberty’s hand! We dream for the globe, let our joy overflow, From purple peaks proud, watch our freedom’s light grow, Got what I voted for! YEAAHH!America’s dancing, the dream’s full of glee, With the Emperor striding, we’re bold as can be! From sea to bright sea, our joy’s here to stay, We’re winning with laughter, in a red, white, and blue way! O say, does that banner yet wave, For the joyful and free, whose future we save! God bless America, let freedom ring!! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit accordion.substack.com

Hey there, polka crew, it’s Jeff, your accordion-thrashin’ host, dishin’ a news roundup fiercer than a rattlesnake in a dust storm! Episode 6, “Lookout Bellow!,” is a rowdy hoedown, tearin’ through June 1–7, 2025, with a kick zappier than a live wire. I’m packin’ 24 headlines into a polka scorcher, from Trump’s travel ban lockin’ the gates to ICE raids rattlin’ LA’s day laborers, plus Musk’s X brawl with Trump and RFK’s fry-shunnin’ diet crusade. Then, “Civil Riots Serenade” storms in with some totally 80s pop fire, shreddin’ the CRS’s civil rights hustle, inspired by Auron Macintyre’s X thread on the subject: https://x.com/AuronMacintyre/status/1930276942294483137!Polka Week in Review: June 1 to June 7, 2025Polka week in review, June first to seventh news, Headlines scream, the polka’s dream, let’s take a cruise! From Trump’s Big Bans to Riot Plans, let’s go 1 2 3, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, Adjust Accordionly!Judge Saves TPS for Venezuelans, and a Remittance Tax, Muslim in Boulder, Chucking Fire, Trump Ships his family fast, Booker’s “Salute,” and Bono’s Stats, Musk Bats both away, Musk and Trump Kayfabe it out, DOGE Cuts spark the fray! Ukraine Drones Russia, Peace Talks take a dive, ICE in Beantown and LA, Illegals Run for their lives!Week’s a riot, news won’t quiet, hear the polka sing, From Terror Flops to MAGA’s Tops, let the tubas ring!Hey! Etna Blows Jean-Pierre’s Woes, steps on Tapper’s lines! Ho! Zelenskyy Whines, Putin Shines, NATO Maligns! No Globalist Lies, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly!Hobbs Vetoes for China, as they Smuggle Fungus, what a sin! Trump Cans Nineteen Lands, Dems Cry it’s “a Muslim Ban” again! Sesame Street’s Flag, FBI Hunts Docs who Trans Kids! East Palestine’s Cancer Spike, Biden’s Plight what Mayor Pete did! Judge Slaps Trump, Hormone Bump, Trans Inmates keep shots! Hegseth Changes Names of Boats, no more Milk Yachts!Week’s a spark, rips through the dark, polka’s got that flair, From Woke’s Fakes to Trump’s Big Stakes, news fills the air!Hey! Israel Wants Iran War, déjà vu’s a polka blast! Ho! LA’s Riots Flare, National Guard unleashed at last! No Elite’s Deceit, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly!Week’s a fire, hearts climb higher, hear the polka’s roar, From Travel Bans to Riot Plans, we settle the score! With Grit and Might, we’ll win the fight, polka’s hearty sound, Dance to the News, Accordion’s Muse, let truth’s sound be found!Hey! Fake Nazis Nabbed, it’s COVID Again, what a Clown Show! Ho! California Red? Rolls Scrubbed, San Diego Goes! RFK Says Diets Kill, don’t pass the Fries, my man, Troops in LA, Riots Rage, Governor Newsom’s in a Can! ICE Raids, Mexican Parades, MAGA’s got the Crown! Travel Ban’s Tight, Dems Ignite, Riots Burn it down! Drums and Brass, Guitar’s Fast Pass, our spirit’s never wrong, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly!Adjust Accordionly!News Headlines Covered: June 1 to June 7, 2025* Federal Judge Upholds TPS for Venezuelans (May 31–June 7)A federal judge extended Temporary Protected Status for 5,000 Venezuelans, allowing them to remain and work in the US.* Remittance Tax Proposed for Latin America (May 31–June 7)A proposed 5% tax on remittances to Latin America sparked debate online about its potential impact on migrant communities.* Boulder Protester Attempts Arson (June 1)Egyptian national Mohamad Soliman threw Molotov cocktails at Boulder protesters, shouting “Free Palestine,” and set himself on fire.* Boulder Protester’s Family Faces Deportation (June 1)Federal authorities detained the family of Mohamad Soliman after his arson attempt in Boulder, but a judge paused their deportation.* Booker’s Gesture Labeled “Nazi Salute” by Online Critics (June 1)Senator Cory Booker’s arm gesture during a speech was called a “Nazi salute” by some online commentators, prompting a response from Elon Musk.* Bono Claims USAID Cuts Caused 300,000 Deaths (June 1)Musician Bono stated that Trump’s USAID budget cuts led to 300,000 deaths, drawing a rebuttal from Elon Musk, fueling online debates.* Musk and Trump Clash Over DOGE Budget Cuts (June 2–7)The Freedom Caucus supported Trump’s DOGE budget reductions targeting USAID and PBS, but a deleted post by Elon Musk sparked speculation of a feud.* Ukraine Conducts Drone Strikes on Russia (June 2)Ukrainian drones, supported by NATO, struck Russian targets, escalating tensions before scheduled peace negotiations.* Peace Talks Falter as Zelenskyy Remains Noncommittal (June 2)Ukrainian President Zelenskyy’s reluctance to commit to peace talks with Russia, amid ongoing drone strikes, drew online skepticism.* ICE Raids Detain 1,500 in Boston and LA (June 3)Immigration and Customs Enforcement conducted large-scale raids, detaining 1,500 undocumented immigrants in Boston and Los Angeles.* Mount Etna Erupts, Disrupts Sicily Tourism (June 3–6)Mount Etna erupted, spewing lava and ash, causing tourists to evacuate parts of Sicily and prompting online discussions.* Jean-Pierre’s Memoir Reveals White House Operations (June 3–6)Former White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre published a memoir detailing internal Biden administration dynamics.* Zelenskyy Criticizes Putin for Avoiding Peace Talks (June 4)Ukrainian President Zelenskyy accused Russian President Putin of evading peace negotiations, citing ongoing assassination concerns.* Arizona Governor Vetoes Bill Restricting Chinese Land Purchases (June 4–6)Governor Katie Hobbs vetoed legislation that would have restricted Chinese entities from purchasing Arizona land, prompting criticism online.* Chinese Nationals Arrested for Smuggling Crop-Damaging Fungus (June 4–6)Two Chinese nationals were detained for attempting to smuggle a fungus harmful to US agriculture, labeled as potential “agroterrorism.”* Trump Imposes Travel Ban on 19 Countries (June 4)President Trump announced a travel ban affecting 12 countries, including Afghanistan and Haiti, citing terrorism risks.* FBI Investigates Medical Procedures for Transgender Youth (June 5)The FBI launched an investigation into doctors performing medical procedures on transgender youth, prompting polarized reactions online.* Sesame Street Pride Flag Display Draws Criticism (June 5)Sesame Street’s display of a pride flag sparked controversy, with conservative critics accusing the show of promoting an agenda to children.* East Palestine Reports Cancer Increase After Train Derailment (June 5)Residents of East Palestine, Ohio, reported rising cancer cases, attributing them to the 2023 train derailment.* Judge Rules Prisons Must Provide Hormone Therapy for Trans Inmates (June 6)Federal Judge Royce Lamberth ordered that prisons continue providing hormone therapy for transgender inmates.* National Guard Deployed to Quell Los Angeles Riots (June 6–7)President Trump deployed 2,000 National Guard troops to Los Angeles after riots erupted following ICE raids, with protesters setting fires.* Navy Considers Renaming Ships Honoring Tubman, Milk (June 6)The US Navy is reviewing proposals to rename ships honoring Harriet Tubman and Harvey Milk, prompting debates online.* AIPAC Advocates for US Action Against Iran (June 7)The American Israel Public Affairs Committee intensified calls for US intervention against Iran, dividing opinions online.* FBI Arrests Alleged “Nazis” in Washington State (June 7)The FBI arrested individuals in Washington state accused of posing as Nazis, with some commentators questioning the operation’s authenticity.Health Experts Recommend Masks for New COVID Variant (June 7)Public health officials urged mask-wearing due to the emergence of COVID variant NB181, prompting varied reactions online.Thanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.Civil Riots SerenadeHush now children gather near A tricky tale of rights we hold so dear For reasons none of us can say Our civil riots serenadeIn sixty-four they spun a song A civil dream but something’s wrong With shiny smiles they grabbed your hand Led you dancing through their planOh that freedom tune’s a catchy lie Hides the truth don’t question why The mask slips off their game’s a bust Their “peace” reduces us to dustThey scheme and snoop to dim your spark They hush your voice out in the dark Your heart’s their ENEMY Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh oohThey stir the crowds they light the flame Chant their slogans play their game With Huxtable grins they sell the spin While heritage folks lose their kinThey pull the strings to clip your wings They mute the truth while chaos sings Your heart’s their ENEMY Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh oohRound and round the shadows creep CRS keeps secrets deep Hush don’t cry just play along Close your eyes and hum their songBoston’s scars they swept away Trayvon’s cries in summer’s sway Lewiston’s plea a twisted play They hide the truth and turn the day Spin their tales control the fight While cities burn into the night Ferguson’s fire they shaped the lore A staged-up clash to lock the doorThey spin lies to keep us blind From truths that spark the heart and mind Sanford’s call they drowned in shade Built their walls where voices fade With honeyed lies they dodge the strife To cage the souls that chase the life They plot and scheme to break your call They hunt the brave who stand up tall Your heart’s their ENEMY Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh ooh Round and round the shadows creep CRS keeps secrets deep Hush don’t cry just play along Close your eyes and hum their song The veil’s been torn their game’s a sham A civil trick to build a dam They spun their lies to cage the free To crush the heart of you and me Purge their lies their sneaky deed They fear your spirit’s SEEDThey scheme and snoop to dim your spark They hush your voice out in the dark Your heart’s their ENEMY Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh oohRound and round the shadows creep CRS keeps secrets deep Hush don’t cry just play along Close your eyes and hum their songYour heart is their ENEMY Ooh-ooh ooh-ooh ooh This is a public episode.

Hey there, polka fans, it’s your accordion-slammin’ host, Jeff, droppin’ the spiciest news roundup this side of the Rio Grande! Episode 5, “Your Mom Stole the Kishka,” is a skankin’ fiesta, spinnin’ May 25–31, 2025, with a zip that’s hotter than a border wall barbecue. I’m dishin’ 21 headlines in a pop/ska polka, from Macron’s Hanoi slap to Greenwald’s skirt-liftin’ leak, plus Diddy’s Obama bombshell and Bongino’s Epstein snafu. Then, it’s “Adios, Amigos!,” a mariachi-ska-punk farewell to our unwelcome guests, sendin’ ‘em packin’ with a grin. We also razz Pride Month’s glittery fruitcakes and their parade of public kink. This episode’s a hoot, packed with more kick than a chili-fueled bathroom break, so grab your sombreros and let’s polka like we’re hiding from ICE in the back of a Home Depot.Polka Week in Review: May 25 to May 31, 2025Polka week in review, May twenty fifth to thirty first news,Headlines scream, the polka’s dream, let’s take a cruise!From Macron’s slap to Trump’s big scrap, let’s go 1 2 3,Grab your accordion, let’s set it, Adjust Accordionly!Macron’s cheek gets Brigitte’s whack, Hanoi’s elite go bye,Peterson Fails, Capybara Sails, Digital Kangaroos Can’t Fly,NPR cries, Trump cuts their ties, no funds for woke’s sad tune,Trump locks colleges flat, visa pause keeps lefties strewn,Harvard’s deals get trashed for reals, their ivory towers crumble,Biden’s crew hid his fog, Comer’s probe makes ‘em stumble!Week’s a riot, left’s in quiet, hear the polka sing,From elite flops to MAGA’s tops, let the trumpets ring!Hey! RFK yanks vax, kids dodge the CDC’s sting,Ho! J6 lawyers sacked, Trump’s DOJ takes wing,No media lies, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong,Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly!Colorado trims trans fluff, Texas slaps woke screens,Diddy’s trial spills Obama’s pills, elite dirt bursts at seams,Fannie, Freddie privatized, Trump shakes the loan cartel,Migrant’s letter threatens Trump, MAGA’s rage will yell,Elon quits DOGE, budget dreams fade, back to Tesla’s call,Bongino checks Epstein’s tapes, it’s “suicide” after all!HA HA HA HA!!Week’s a spark, rips through the dark, polka’s got that flair,From elite scams to freedom’s slams, news fills the air!Hey! Florida kicks over two hundred, human traffickers in the rear,Ho! Paul and Massie cry debt, their whines fall on deaf ears,No globalist lies, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong,Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly!Week’s a fire, hearts climb higher, hear the polka’s cheer,From woke’s retreat to Trump’s big beat, no globalist veneer!With zest and pride, we’ll turn the tide, polka’s hearty sound,Dance to the beat, accordion’s heat, let headlines’ truth be found!Week’s a blaze, left’s in a haze, hear the polka’s roar,From SNAP’s big slash to judges’ clash, we settle the score!With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, our spirit’s unbound,Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found!Hey! SNAP cut, protests shut, Trump’s bill rocks the fight,Ho! Judges’ power clipped, MAGA’s plan burns bright,Layoffs stalled, courts are called, but Trump’s still in the race,Cuomo’s COVID lies killed, DOJ puts him in his place,Newsman’s skirt, Greenwald’s dirt, a leak of something wrong,Hey! May’s wild spark to headlines’ mark, our spirits always strong,Drums and brass, guitar’s fast pass, our roots are long!Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly!Adjust. Accordionly!News Headlines Covered: May 25 to May 31, 2025* Macron Slapped by Brigitte in Hanoi (May 25, 2025)Brigitte Macron was filmed pushing or slapping President Emmanuel Macron during a Hanoi visit, sparking global media attention.* Hanoi’s Communist Elite Ousted (May 25, 2025)Vietnam’s Communist Party leaders were removed in a surprise purge in Hanoi, raising concerns about political stability.* Jordan Peterson’s YouTube Flop (May 26, 2025)Jordan Peterson’s new YouTube video faced heavy criticism, damaging his online reputation.* Capybara Video Steals X Spotlight (May 26, 2025)A viral capybara-and-gorilla video exploded on X, captivating users and overshadowing other trends.* Digital Kangaroos Fail to Hop (May 26, 2025)An AI-generated “digital kangaroos” project flopped due to technical issues, drawing online criticism.* NPR Loses Funding Under Trump (May 27, 2025)The Trump administration cut NPR’s federal funding, prompting protests from supporters.* Trump Halts College Visas (May 27, 2025)President Trump suspended college visas for international students, sparking debates over education access.* Harvard’s Foreign Deals Scrapped (May 27, 2025)Harvard’s international partnerships were terminated under new federal rules targeting foreign influence.* Biden’s Mental Fog Hidden by Aides (May 27, 2025)Leaked reports claimed Biden’s aides hid signs of cognitive decline, fueling political speculation.* Comer’s Probe Nails Biden’s Crew (May 27, 2025)Rep. James Comer’s investigation exposed alleged misconduct among Biden’s former staff.* RFK Jr. Pulls Vaccines for Kids (May 28, 2025)Robert F. Kennedy Jr. withdrew certain childhood vaccines, dividing public health opinions.* Trump Fires J6 Lawyers (May 28, 2025)Trump’s DOJ dismissed January 6-related lawyers, signaling a shift in legal strategy.* Colorado Cuts Trans Programs (May 28, 2025)Colorado defunded transgender programs, facing backlash from LGBTQ+ advocates.* Texas Bans Woke Tech Censorship (May 28, 2025)Texas passed a law prohibiting social media censorship of politically sensitive content.* Diddy’s Trial Links to Obama (May 29, 2025)Unverified rumors during Diddy’s trial alleged ties to Obama, spreading online speculation.* Fannie, Freddie Privatized by Trump (May 29, 2025)Trump announced plans to privatize Fannie Mae and Freddie Mac, causing market debates.* Migrant’s Threat Letter Targets Trump (May 30, 2025)A leaked, unverified migrant letter threatened Trump, prompting security concerns.* Elon Musk Leaves DOGE (May 30, 2025)With his tenure over, Elon Musk leaves his roll with DOGE to refocus his attention on Tesla.* Bongino Claims Epstein Tapes Show “Suicide” (May 31, 2025)Dan Bongino claimed Epstein tapes confirmed “suicide,” igniting a firestorm online.* Florida Busts 255 Human Traffickers (May 31, 2025)Florida arrested 255 in a human trafficking sting linked to illegal immigration.* Paul and Massie Slam National Debt (May 31, 2025)Rand Paul and Thomas Massie criticized the rising national debt, urging reform.* Trump’s SNAP Cuts Spark Protests (May 31, 2025)Trump’s SNAP benefit cuts triggered protests from advocacy groups.* Judges’ Power Curbed by MAGA Bill (May 31, 2025)A Trump-backed bill limited federal judges’ authority, raising legal concerns.* Layoffs Halted by Court Rulings (May 31, 2025)Federal courts blocked corporate layoffs, citing labor or economic issues.* Cuomo’s COVID Lies Exposed by DOJ (May 31, 2025)A DOJ probe accused Andrew Cuomo of misrepresenting COVID-19 nursing home deaths.* Greenwald’s Sex Tape Leak Rocks X (May 31, 2025)Glenn Greenwald’s sex tape leak sparked online gossip.Thanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.Adios, Amigos!Olé! Arriba! ¡Rrrrrrr!Ay, ay, ay, amigos, grab your sombreros!This spicy song’s all about sending those border jumpers packing!With Trump in charge, it’s a fiesta of farewells!Time to boot ‘em out with a big ol’ smile!Let’s get this party started, ADIOS AMIGOS!Ay, ay, ay! ¡Vete ya!Old Greg in Texas had a dream, ¡Sueño!Bussed migrants north to end the scheme, ¡Malvado!To blue cities they went,Where the liberals all vent,Adios to that border-crossing team! ¡Adiós!Ay, ay! ¡Adiós!DeSantis flew ‘em to the Vine, ¡Ricos!Where NIMBY liberals sip on their wine, ¡Élite!The Venezuelans got played,Now they’re sent on their way,Get out, this land’s not yours it’s mine! ¡Lárgate!Ay, ay, ay! ¡Lárgate!Olé! Arriba! The border wall’s so grand!No more sneaking through, we’re guarding the land!Send ‘em packing, no delay! ¡Fuera ya!Springfield’s Haitians munch on your pets, ¡Almuerzo!Trump’s word’s the gospel, no regrets, ¡El rey!Their TPS is through,Voodoo dreams won’t do,Back to Haiti, no more island debts! ¡Adiós!Ay, ay! ¡Vámonos!Abrego’s a thug from M.S. 13, ¡Malvado!A Maryland man he’s never bean, ¡Jamás!Biden’s stooge spun a tale,But we sent him to jail,El Salvador’s where he’s now seen! ¡En cárcel!Olé! Arriba! Big beautiful border wall’s so fine!No more sneaking through, we’re holding the line!Send ‘em packing, no delay! ¡Fuera ya!¡Rápido!Adios, amigos! hit the road and scat, ¡Rápido!From Texas to Ohio, we’ll have no more of that! Olé!With a boot and a smile, no more vacancy! ¡Cerrado!Olé! AMERICA’S OUR LAND! from sea to shining sea! ¡Vámonos!¡Cállate! ¡Rápido! ¡Rrrr!They scream, they sue, but we’re taking it back,No sanctuary scams, no more open mat,The crowds cheer loud, we’re setting the score,Arriba! America, show ‘em the door!Ay, ay, ay! ¡Piérdete!Venezuelans thought they’d play, ¡No bueno!But Trump’s old law swept ‘em away, ¡Vete ya!To CECOT’s grim cell,Where the gangbangers dwell,Adios, you’ve got no right to stay! ¡Rápido!Ay, ay! ¡Adiós!A grand to leave, what a score! ¡Ricos somos!Take the cash and don’t come back no more, ¡Adiós!CBP’s app says “go,”With your tacos in tow,Self-deport’o, we’re slamming the door! ¡Piérdete!Arriba! Great big beautiful border wall’s the best!No more sneaking through, we’re passing the test!Send ‘em packing, no delay! ¡Fuera ya!¡Rápido!Adios, amigos! hit the road and scat, ¡Rápido!From Texas to Ohio, we’ll have no more of that! Olé!With a boot and a smile, no more vacancy! ¡Cerrado!Olé! AMERICA’S OUR LAND! from sea to shining sea! ¡Vámonos!¡Fuera ya! Arriba! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit accordion.substack.com

Hey there, polka fans, it’s your accordion-squeezin’ host, Jeff, droppin’ the grooviest news roundup this side of the DMZ! Episode 4, “Polka at the Alp-ollo,” is a swingin’ bash, spinnin’ May 18-24, 2025, with a zippy-zing that’s keener than a jukebox on overdrive. I’m servin’ up 23 headlines in a yodel-packed Alpine polka, from Israel’s Gaza genocide to Trump’s Putin deal; plus Diddy’s courtroom skid and Nancy Mace’s reverse revenge porn movie marathon. Then, I’m bustin’ out with “Nancy Mace Anatomy,” a grrl power firecracker about a feisty gal who’s all boobs and bravado and bathroom bans—my kinda tune! This episode’s a hoot, packed with more turtle power than a tabloid in a tizzy, so grab your pod-catcher, check the Substack notes for lyrics and videos, and let’s polka like it’s 1952!Polka Week in Review: May 18 to May 24, 2025Polka week in review, May eighteen to twenty-four’s news,Headlines shout, the polka’s clout, let’s take a cruise!From Gaza’s fire to Trump’s desire, let’s go 1 2 3,Grab your accordion, alpine style, Adjust Accordionly!Israel’s Gaza blitz, it’s genocide, let’s call it what it is,Trump works Putin, no collusion, just a deal it ain’t his rizz,Zelenskyy meets with Vance, dodging drones in Kiev’s fight,Biden’s cancer’s past dementia, laundering’s not his only plight,Norm’s last call, George Wendt leaves at seventy-six,NOLA’s cons bolt, jailbreak’s got New Orleans in a fix!Week’s a riot, left’s in quiet, hear the polka sing,From jails to fights, we’ll torch the slights, let alphorns ring!Hey! 86-ers under investigation for threatening the King,Ho! Mexican boat hits Brooklyn Bridge, it’s a diversity thing!No NOAA’s wild weather lies, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong,Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly!Trump’s Big Beautiful Bill cuts deep, that’s the game,McIver takes on ICE fistfight, Newark’s brawling dame,Tapper snitches on Dems, Biden’s decline they hid,Diddy’s in court, Cassie’s got him on the skid,Nottoway’s torched, ATF hunts arson’s spark,Harvard’s foreigners out, Trump’s ban leaves ‘em in the dark!Week’s a spark, rips through the dark, polka’s got that flair,From brawls to bans, we’ll roast the plans, news fills the air!Hey! Trump’s deportation piggy bank, USAID’s bled dry,Ho! ActBlue’s feeling blue, DOJ’s got ‘em shy!No Big Bird streaming lies, we’ll keep the beat, our roots are long,Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly!Week’s a fire, hearts climb higher, hear the polka’s cheer,From Gaza’s pain to Dems’ disdain, no globalist veneer!With zest and pride, we’ll turn the tide, alpine polka’s sound,Dance to the beat, accordion’s heat, let truth’s sound be found!Week’s a blaze, left’s in a haze, hear the polka’s roar,From Biden’s fall to Trump’s big call, we settle the score!With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, our spirit’s unbound,Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found!Hey! Dilbert shares bad news, let’s press F for that king,Ho! Eggs are cheap again, our wallets sing!Revenge porn banned, no more digital disgrace,Harrises Hollywood friends, paid to save her face!Trump puts EU in check, tariffs mate their game,Polka’s truth cuts through, no leftist spin’s the same,Drums and brass, clarinet’s fast pass, our spirits never wrong,Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly!Adjust Accordion-lee-hee-hoo!News Headlines Covered: May 18 to May 24, 2025* Israel’s Gaza Blitz Called Genocide (May 18 2024)Israel’s Gaza offensive is branded genocide, with X ablaze as users call out the carnage, while globalists try to spin the chaos.* Trump’s Putin Pact Stuns Left (May 18 2024)Trump’s deal with Putin has leftists cryin’ “collusion”—X users roast the Dems’ tired script with a barrage of memes.* Zelenskyy And Vance Meet in Kyiv (May 18 2024)Zelenskyy meets Vance in Kyiv, dodgin’ drones to plot war moves—X hypes their grit as Ukraine’s fight trends big.* Biden’s Cancer, Dementia, Laundering Woes (May 18 2024)Biden’s health flops with cancer, dementia, and laundering rumors—X users sling the scandal like it’s the juiciest gossip in town.* George Wendt Passes At 76 (May 18 2024)Cheers star George Wendt exits at 76—X pours one out for Norm, floodin’ feeds with tributes to a sitcom giant.* New Orleans Jailbreak Sparks Mayhem (May 18 2024)Inmates bust loose in New Orleans, turnin’ the Big Easy into a jailbreak jamboree—X memes the madness like it’s Mardi Gras!* 86-ers Probed For Threatening Trump (May 21 2024)86-ers get grilled for threatenin’ Trump—X rallies behind the King, mockin’ the plotters’ flop with snarky posts.* Mexican Boat Slams Brooklyn Bridge (May 21 2024)A Mexican boat crashes into the Brooklyn Bridge—X dubs it a “diversity” disaster, with crash gifs stealin’ the show.* NOAA’s Climate Spin Crumbles (May 21 2024)As weird storms rage across the nation, NOAA’s weather lies get canned—X users keep the polka beat strong, laughin’ off the climate baloney with snarky threads.* Trump’s Debt-Cutting Bill (May 22 2024)Trump’s Big Beautiful Bill slashes debt, with X patriots cheerin’ the smackdown on Dems’ spendin’ spree.* McIver’s ICE Brawl In Newark (May 22 2024)Newark’s McIver throws down with ICE in a street brawls—X crowns her a firecracker, trendin’ with fight clips.* Tapper Rats Out Dems On Biden’s Decline (May 22 2024)CNN’s Tapper spills that Dems hid Biden’s health crash—X users serve the tea, rippin’ the cover-up with memes.* Diddy’s Court Battle With Cassie (May 22 2024)Diddy’s trial over Cassie’s claims has X buzzin’ with baby oil jokes and showbiz drama—talk about a skid!* Nottoway Arson Ignites ATF Chase (May 22 2024)Nottoway burns in an arson attack—X speculates as ATF hunts the firebug, sparklin’ heated threads.* Harvard’s Foreigner Ban (May 22 2024)Harvard boots foreigners under Trump’s ban—X waves bye-bye to globalists, with ban memes floodin’ feeds.* Trump’s Deportation Fund (May 23 2024)Trump raids USAID to fund deportations—X cheers the border blitz, with leftists whinin’ in the comments.* ActBlue Under DOJ Investigation (May 23 2024)ActBlue’s rattled by a DOJ probe—X watches Dems squirm, with snark flyin’ faster than a polka beat.* Big Bird’s Streaming (May 23 2024)Sesame Street’s on Netflix now—X keeps dunkin’ on Big Bird’s baloney with glee.* Scott Adams’ Cancer Diagnosis (May 24 2024)Dilbert’s Scott Adams reveals cancer—X sends F’s and support for the comics king battlin’ tough odds.* Egg Prices Drop (May 24 2024)Egg prices crash, makin’ wallets sing—X celebrates with omelet emojis and breakfast braggin’ rights.* Revenge Porn Ban (May 24 2024)Congress passes a revenge porn ban crushing digital creeps—X crowns Melania a queen, with victory posts explodin’.* Harris’ Hollywood PR Scheme (May 24 2024)Harris’ Hollywood pals get paid to prop her up—X calls out the Tinseltown con, with shade thrown left and right.* Trump’s EU Tariffs (May 24 2024)Trump’s tariffs checkmate the EU’s trade game—X salutes the sheriff, with globalists cryin’ on the sidelines.Thanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.Nancy Mace AnatomyEyes down here, boys……look at my tits…I’m a top-tier body with a butter face, a hard-nosed bitch that’s a-goin’ someplaceGot a rock-hard ego and a sailor’s mouth, you’ll know it’s me when I’m in your HouseI’m your worst nightmare, a trans-exclusionary Republican feministI’m an ice cold diva here to make a scene, but you can call me Nancy…I stormed the gates of The Citadel, yeah, I broke the moldDaddy was the boss, opened doors, or so I’m toldFirst girl in the ranks, made those boys all lose their coolWrote a book, cashed the fame, yeah, I rewrote the rulesThey called it progress, said I paved the way for moreBut when I crashed their clubhouse, they were rattled to the corpsI fought to claim my space, no shame, I took my shotBut now I’m pointin’ fingers at the perverts on the potI’m a girl boss, struttin’, always flashin’ my chestBustin’ headlines poppin’ like the buttons on my breastKicked open men’s doors, slammed shut the ladies’ nestNOW… LOOK AT MY TITS! THEY’RE THE BEST OF THE BESTNow I’m spillin’ tea ‘bout my ex, a creep with a phoneCaught him filmin’ secrets, pervs ain’t leavin’ me aloneTook it to the House floor, let the whole world seeMy drama’s like my rack—big, bold, and freeThey whisper it’s a stunt, just a grab for TV fameBut I’m the queen of Congress, and my boobs are my claimI built my name on breakin’ through, no fear, no second guessNow I’m blockin’ men from using the ladies’ restroom in a dressI’m a girl boss, struttin’, always flashin’ my chestMakin’ waves like water splashin’ off of my breastCrossdressers denied, the men’s room with the restNOW… LOOK AT MY TITS! THEY’RE THE BEST OF THE BESTMy boobs are my power, they’re the talk of the townDouble Ds of glory, never lettin’ me downThey’re my fun bags, my dirty pillows, my chest meat supremeStealin’ every spotlight, livin’ every gal’s dreamThey’re the jiggly jubilee, my knockers of fameMy twin peaks of triumph, puttin’ all to shameThey’re my bodacious tah-tahs, my sweater-stuffin’ rageGonna set another first as the first representative with an OnlyFans pageI’m a girl boss, struttin’, always flashin’ my chestDroppin’ jaws on the Floor, they’re always starin’ at my breastNo trannies allowed, those freaks are a messNOW… LOOK AT MY TITS! THEY’RE THE BEST OF THE BEST OF THE BEST OF THE BESTFrom Citadel to Congress, I’m the gal who breaks the moldBut trannies in the bathroom? That’s the line I’ll holdGirl boss gospel, sing it loud, I’m a media hitNancy Mace, in your face, NOW… LOOK AT MY TITS!THEY’RE THE BEST OF THE BEST… This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit accordion.substack.com

Hey folks, welcome to Episode 3: Squeeze Harder of Adjust Accordionly, where I’m crankin’ the accordion for a polka-primed recap of May 11 to 17, 2025’s zaniest news and events before pummeling you goofballs with another original track! This week’s polka torches headlines like Kanye’s Hitler-ing, Trump ending the The Ukraine War , Our President’s F-bomb, and SCOTUS teeing Trump up for his Andrew Jackson moment; all with a wurlitzer’s bite. Then, we dive into “Black Pill,” a crooner-surf-rockabilly-doowop ultra-violence fantasy from the 2020 George Fentanyl riots, starring an anti-hero with a cool jacket. It’s a high-octane riot with accordion swagger—Adjust Accordionly!Polka Week in Review: May 11 to May 17, 2025Polka week in review, May eleven to seventeen’s news, Headlines blaze, the polka’s craze, let’s take a cruise! From Kanye’s rants to Trump’s bold stand, let’s go 1-2-3, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, Adjust Accordionly! Kanye’s Hitler jab starts our crazy week off well, WaPo’s shell game, Baldwin shoots Rust, Hallmark’s tariff fail, Trump slashes drugs, Big Pharma’s on its knees, Reparations crash, Democrats defeated with ease, South Africa’s in chaos, Trump talks about their luck, WEF’s global scam exposed when Trump drops a duck! Week’s a riot, left’s in quiet, hear the polka sing, From scams to fights, we’ll torch the slights, let the tubas ring! Hey! Hot Afrikaner refugees gain overwhelming cheers, Ho! Rogue judge falls, ICE clears the fears! No woke Hollywood’s lies, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly! Trump ends NATO’s war in Ukraine just like he planned, Judge and Starmer flop, expose the globalists’ weak hand, Comey’s eighty-sixed, FBI spoils his plot, Say goodbye to racist roads, SCOTUS gives 1832 another shot, Kanye’s 14 words make the leftoids cry, Trump’s deportations make illegals fly! Week’s a spark, rips through the dark, polka’s got that flair, From fakes to rules, we’ll school the fools, news fills the air! Hey! NATO faces extinction let’s all clank our beers, Ho! Plan trusters right again let’s all stand and cheer! No dopey media lies, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly! Week’s a fire, hearts climb higher, hear the polka’s cheer, From rants to fights, we’ll dodge the slights, no globalist veneer! With jest and pride, we’ll turn the tide, our spirit’s unbound, Dance to the beat, accordion’s heat, let headlines’ sound be found! Week’s a blaze, left’s in a haze, hear the polka’s roar, From Ye’s Hitler heiling to Trump’s command, we settle the score! With grit and might, we’ll win the fight, our spirit’s unbound, Dance to the news, accordion’s muse, let truth’s sound be found! Hey! Starmer’s IDs spark freedom’s fight, Ho! Burj flag flies, anti-globalist light! Boykin’s fraud falls, X’s truth won’t bend, Russia’s bold stand, Ukraine’s at its end! Drums and brass, guitar’s fast pass, our spirits never wrong, Hey! May’s wild spark to headlines’ mark, we’ll keep it strong! No woke surveillance lies, we’ll keep the beat, our roots are long, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly! Adjust. Accordionly!News Headlines Covered: May 11 to May 17, 2025* Kanye’s Hitler Rant Ignites X (May 11, 2025)Kanye’s X posts praising Hitler spark a firestorm, with right-wing fans cheering his “Hitler-ing” while critics clutch pearls, amplifying the culture war on social media.* Media and Baldwin’s Rust Flop Hard (May 11–17, 2025)WaPo spins Comey’s schemes, Hallmark’s tariff woes tank, and Baldwin’s Rust bombs, mocked on X as leftist media’s latest faceplant, with users piling on the “shell game.”* Trump Slashes Drug Prices (May 12, 2025)Trump’s executive action guts Big Pharma’s price hikes, cheered by patriots on X as a blow to corporate greed, while drug giants scramble to spin the loss.* Reparations Bill Crashes in Congress (May 12, 2025)A reparations push flops as Democrats face defeat, with X users slamming it as a divisive grift, boosting anti-leftist memes and “crash” gifs galore.* South Africa’s Chaos Draws Trump’s Ire (May 13, 2025)Afrikaner complaints and refugee slogans trend on X as Trump calls out South Africa’s “luck,” fueling debates over global migration and national sovereignty.* Trump’s F-Bomb Rocks WEF (May 14, 2025)Trump’s “chung-gantuan” F-bomb at the WEF goes viral, with X hailing it as a death knell for globalist scams, while elites reel from the “fall down dead” moment.* Trump Ends NATO’s Ukraine War (May 14, 2025)Trump’s peace talks “yeet” NATO’s war into the “dustbin of history,” with X users praising his deal-making as Ukraine’s conflict winds down, irking globalist hawks.* Judge and Starmer’s Globalist Flops (May 15–16, 2025)A judge’s ICE indictment and Starmer’s UK ID push crumble, with X mocking their “weak hand” as Russia’s Ukraine demands also falter, exposing globalist overreach.* Comey’s Deep State Plot Busted (May 16, 2025)Comey’s cryptic “8647” X post triggers an FBI probe, with patriots cheering he’s “eighty-sixed” as Deep State schemes get aired out in viral threads.* SCOTUS Rejects 1832 Act, DOT Ditches Road Claims (May 15–17, 2025)SCOTUS fumbles the Alien Enemies Act, leaving room for Trump to channel Jackson’s grit, while DOT scraps “racist roads” nonsense, celebrated on X as a leftist L.* Kanye’s “14 Words” Stir Chaos (May 17, 2025)Kanye’s new song sends many on right and left into a tailspin, with X debates raging over free speech and Ye’s anti-establishment crusade.* Trump’s Deportation Push Surges (May 17, 2025)Trump’s veteran funds and deportation plans, including self-deportation, go “clickety-clack” on X, with supporters hyping it as a border security win.Thanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.Black PillLosing faith for sure; Find it hard to endure; New circumstance of life; Growing dim inside Mass collapse growing near; Praying hard to steer clear; Not wanting to endure; Losing faith for sure They say not to take heart; And not let faith be forgot; You can’t let evil prevail; But that evil bringeth hell— ...and I’ll ring that bell Death like vultures; Dancing ‘round the flame; Black hooded masks; To them it’s just a game But to the rest; It’s something more severe; Me and my Buick leave riots; As a smeer ...with a sneer From my rearview mirror Ain’t got much; Just a shovel and a gun; And me and the boys; We’re cruisin’ just for fun Found ourselves a vulture; Separate from the pack; It didn’t take much; To stuff him in the back ...attack And his jaw went slack Out in the desert; Wind at our back; Going to the trunk; Ain’t looking for the jack Pull the vulture out; Rake him cross the coals; Hand him that shovel; Digging his own hole ...all told That’s how the tale unfolds Now baby don’t tell me; That you don’t love your man; And don’t you shy away when; He offers his hand Now the landscape it may; It may be stark; And the road ahead; It may be very... Dark ...but don’t you tell me That you don’t love your man Your man he sees you; Standing there like a dream; Barren wasteland asunder; In the distance a scream Retail fires are raging; And you’re a-raging too; In words torn from a novel; He moves right next to you ...and don’t you tell me That you don’t love your man Baby baby now; don’t you love your man; Oh yeah baby; don’t you love your man; Know he’s doing for you; best that he can; Don’t tell me baby; that you don’t love your man Don’t tell me baby; that you don’t love your man Don’t tell me baby; that you don’t love your man This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit accordion.substack.com

Hey folks, welcome to Episode 2: Electric Polkaloo of Adjust Accordionly, where I’m crankin’ the accordion for a polka-fueled recap of May 4 to 10, 2025’s wildest news and politics, plus a fresh original track! This week’s polka slams through headlines like Shiloh Hendrix’s gamer-word chart-topper, Trump’s Alcatraz prison pitch, and a “melanated diabetes in bronze” statue stirrin’ up X, all with a Cleveland-style bounce. Then, we rip into “My Wife’s Boyfriend Chad,” a synth-fueled ska-punk anthem roastin’ corner chair appreciators with some IROC-Z swagger. It’s a high-energy riot with a little polka pizzazz—Adjust Accordionly!Polka Week in Review: May 4 to May 10, 2025Polka week in review, May fourth to tenth’s wild news, Headlines leap, the polka’s deep, let’s take a cruise! From pope memes to border fights, let’s go 1-2-3, Grab your accordion, let’s set it, Adjust Accordionly! Trump’s AI pope pic sparks fights, left’s in a huff, Movie tariffs slam Bollywood, Hollywood’s tough! Alcatraz plan’s pitched, crooks face a grim lock, Marco Grande’s double gig, Rubio’s on the clock! Trump’s Middle East jaunt, dealin’ with flair, AOC’s crushed by Homan, borders ain’t fair! Week’s a riot, news won’t quiet, hear the polka sing, From scams to fights, we’ll dodge the slights, let the tubas ring! Hey! Pope memes flare, borders glare, the week’s a wild ride, Ho! Accordion wails, drumbeat sails, truth’s on our side! No elite’s deceit, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly! Musk fights UK censors, free speech takes wing! Conclave called, super fast, now it’s Leo 14th! Saar Wars drones buzz, poop flies, phone scams stalled, Shiloh uses gamer words and beats Karmelo’s haul! Kamala’s couture cackle, Met Gala’s a mess, ICE nabs Newark’s mayor, the right’s unimpressed! Week’s a spark, cuts through the dark, polka’s got that flair, From fakes to rules, we’ll school the fools, news fills the air! Hey! Scams collapse, elites relapse, the week’s a polka blast, Ho! Horns groove, guitar moves, the news comes fast! No elite’s deceit, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly! Week’s a fire, hearts climb higher, hear the polka’s cheer, From memes to fights, we’ll dodge the slights, no commie veneer! With jest and pride, we’ll turn the tide, our spirit’s unbound, Dance to the beat, accordion’s heat, let headlines’ sound be found! Hey! From pope AI to Shiloh’s cry, May fourth to tenth shines, Ho! Rubio’s roles to border controls, we dodge elite designs! Saar Wars sizzles, Kamala’s dazzles, our roots won’t bend, No commie statue scheme can break our meme, we’ll polka to the end! Drums and brass, guitar’s fast pass, our spirits never wrong, Hey! May’s wild spark to headlines’ mark, we’ll keep it strong! No elite’s deceit, we’ll keep the beat, our roots are long, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly! Adjust Accordionly!News Headlines Covered: May 4 to May 10, 2025* Trump Posts AI-Generated Image as Pope (May 4, 2025)Trump shared an AI-generated image of himself as the pope on X, trolling the media and sparking fights, though some Catholics called it tasteless during post-Francis mourning, with Terrance K. Williams dubbing it “peak Trump” while critics fumed.* Trump Proposes 100% Tariff on Foreign Movies (May 4, 2025)Trump suggested a 100% tariff on foreign films to boost American entertainment, slamming Bollywood and appealing to economic nationalists, with right-leaning fans seeing it as a push for MAGA-friendly Hollywood, though no policy is finalized.* Trump Proposes Reopening Alcatraz as Prison (May 4, 2025)Trump pitched reopening Alcatraz to house “ruthless criminals,” hyped as a law-and-order move to lock up crooks, with supporters loving the symbolism, but California officials and tourists called it impractical.* Marco Rubio’s Historic Dual Roles as Secretary of Everything (May 5, 2025)Marco Rubio, your “Marco Grande,” became Secretary of State and National Security Adviser, praised by Trump for tackling global issues like Ukraine and Gaza, with right-leaning audiences admiring his “America First” loyalty, though critics see it as overreach.* Trump Plans Middle East Visit (May 5, 2025)Trump announced a Middle East trip to push trade and diplomacy, seen as a bold “America First” move with deal-making flair, with supporters expecting big wins, though specifics remain unclear.* AOC Clashes with Border Czar Tom Homan (May 5, 2025)AOC sparred with Border Czar Tom Homan over mass deportation plans, with Homan crushing her “open-border” stance, and right-leaning fans cheered his defense of enforcement.* Elon Musk Rails Against British Free Speech Crackdown (May 5, 2025)Elon Musk slammed UK online speech restrictions, fueling right-leaning outrage over “commie censorship,” with supporters on X hailing him as a free-speech champion taking wing.* Bishops Arrive in Rome for Conclave (May 6, 2025)Catholic cardinals, including U.S. bishops, gathered in Rome for a conclave to elect a new pope, setting the stage for Pope Leo XIV’s swift selection, with right-leaning Catholics hoping for a conservative pontiff.* Budget Talks in Congress (May 6, 2025)Trump’s team pushed a rescissions package to cut congressional spending, exciting fiscal conservatives, though some Republicans resisted, citing legal or electoral risks.* India-Pakistan Saar Wars, Phone Scams Stalled (May 6, 2025)India-Pakistan tensions, your “Saar Wars,” sizzled with drone strikes and “poop flying,” but JD Vance called it “none of our business,” pleasing isolationists, while phone scams stalled, with X users joking Trump’s economy spooked fraudsters, and a ceasefire was later announced on May 11.* Trump’s Pay-to-Leave Plan for Illegals (May 6, 2025)Trump proposed paying undocumented immigrants to self-deport, pitched as cost-effective to dodge mass roundups, with right-leaning voters liking the pragmatism, but hardliners calling it soft.* Kamala Harris Glams Up at Met Gala (May 6, 2025)Kamala Harris’ Met Gala appearance, all dazzle and couture cackle, drew right-leaning scorn as an elite stunt amid economic struggles, with Charlie Kirk calling it a messy display of disconnect.* P. Diddy Jury Selection Kicks Off (May 6, 2025)Jury selection began for Sean “P. Diddy” Combs’ sex trafficking trial, with right-leaning commentators framing it as exposing Hollywood’s corrupt underbelly, fueling “drain the swamp” narratives.* Deep Fake Porn Crackdown Gains Steam (May 6, 2025)Efforts to ban deep fake pornography won right-leaning support as a stand for traditional values against AI sleaze, marking a rare moral win in tech policy.* Inflation Flat, Consumer Spending Soars (May 6, 2025)Economic data showed stable inflation and surging consumer spending, hailed by right-leaning voters as proof of recovery, with X posts calling it “Biden’s mess, fixed.”* Foreign Workers Down, Native Workers Up (May 6, 2025)Reports showed fewer foreign workers and more native-born Americans employed, aligning with “Hire American” policies, with right-leaning audiences cheering, despite industry gripes.* China Bends Knee to Trump on Fentanyl (May 6, 2025)China signaled cooperation to curb fentanyl exports, a win for right-leaning voters blaming Beijing for the opioid crisis, though skeptics question China’s sincerity.* Melanated Diabetes in Bronze Statue Sparks Outrage (May 6, 2025)A 12-foot bronze statue, dubbed “melanated diabetes in bronze,” drew right-leaning flak as “commie” waste, twelve feet of yawn, with X posts mocking it as “DEI gone wild.”* Shiloh Hendrix’s Battle of Shiloh Rages On (May 6, 2025)Shiloh Hendrix, your “honorary gamer” for using “gamer words,” raked in donations during her “Battle of Shiloh” (likely a streaming controversy), beating “Karmelo’s haul,” with right-leaning X users praising her anti-commie stand.* James Lindsay and Jordan Peterson Interview (May 6, 2025)James Lindsay and Jordan Peterson’s viral interview trashed progressive ideology, resonating with right-leaning fans fighting cultural shifts, with X clips going viral.* Alexander Dickey Murders Student, Race Debate Ignites (May 6, 2025)Alexander Dickey’s murder of a 22-year-old student sparked X posts asking, “Race problem or problem race?,” with right-leaning commentators debating crime and media bias.* Pope Leo XIV Elected, Right-Leaning Catholics Wary (May 7, 2025)American Cardinal Robert Prevost was elected Pope Leo XIV after a swift conclave, exciting U.S. conservatives for his historic role, though some right-leaning Catholics grew wary over his pro-immigration posts, with Laura Loomer noting his “lefty lean.”* Real ID Enforcement Sparks Libertarian Fury (May 7, 2025)Real ID requirements began for federal facilities and flights, angering libertarians who see it as government overreach after decades of delays, with right-leaning voters split—some backing security, others crying “tyranny.”* Republicans Balk at Defunding Planned Parenthood (May 7, 2025)Some AIPAC-aligned Republicans resisted defunding Planned Parenthood, citing political risks, with pro-life right-leaning voters calling it a betrayal.* Trump Targets HUD and Section 8 for Elimination (May 7, 2025)Trump proposed scrapping HUD and Section 8, arguing they breed dependency, with fiscal conservatives cheering, but critics warning of housing crises.* AI Bots Scam College Grants (May 7, 2025)AI bots enrolled in community colleges to scam federal grants, prompting right-leaning calls for education reform, seen as evidence of government waste.* Trump Bans Gain-of-Function Research (May 8, 2025)Trump banned gain-of-function research, citing lab-leak risks, earning praise from right-leaning skeptics of Big Science, with supporters calling it a pandemic safeguard.* ICE Arrests Newark Mayor (May 8, 2025)ICE arrested Newark Mayor Ras Baraka, likely for sanctuary city policies, thrilling right-leaning voters who see it as a crackdown on liberal defiance.Thanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! 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Hey folks, welcome to the kickoff of Adjust Accordionly, where I’m wranglin’ my accordion to sling a polka recap of the week’s news and politics, topped with an original tune! Episode 1 dives into April 27 to May 3, 2025, with headlines like Trump’s Michigan rally and Tesla dealerships torched by leftoid goofballs, all wrapped in a punchy polka beat. Then, we shift gears with “Turn Back the Windrush,” a two-tone ska banger about scrapin’ by as a euro-poor. It’s a wild ride with bowling alley vibes—Adjust Accordionly!Polka Week in Review: April 27 to May 3, 2025Polka week in review, April twenty-seven to May third’s news, Headlines pop, the polka hops, let’s take a cruise! Borders, faith, and fights to sing, we’ll dodge the elite’s play, Grab your clarinet, let’s set it, Adjust Accordionly! Noem’s DHS bolts gates down fast, no 3rd worlder’s spree, ICE grabs India’s fugitive, streets are now shit free! Judges trash Trump’s vote rules, wreckin’ justice like a scam, No pope’s picked yet, DEI’s their bet, faith’s left in a jam! Law firms hit with fines, their tricks decline, down they slam, WTO’s grip slips, globalist cons take a ram! Week’s a blaze, news sets the stage, hear the polka swing, From gates to fights, we’ll dodge the slights, let the tubas ring! Hey! Borders seal, judges reel, the week’s a wild ride, Ho! Clarinet wails, drumbeat sails, truth’s on our side! No elite’s deceit, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly! Trump’s Michigan rally roars, 100 days, no globalist con, NPR’s cash gets slashed, bias slashed, truth’s dawn! Truckers talk English now, Trump’s rule, steer clear of mess! Shiloh Hendrix stands up, white guilt’s done, we can say the n-word again Tesla’s torched by thugs, Musk’s foes shrug, justice gets burned, RFK Jr. guts health waste, Big Pharma’s overturned! Week’s a spark, lights up the dark, polka’s got that flair, From roads to rules, we’ll school the fools, truth’s in the air! Hey! Rallies boom, elites face doom, the week’s a polka blast, Ho! Trombone grooves, guitar moves, the news comes fast! No elite’s deceit, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold strong, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly! Week’s a fire, hearts climb higher, hear the polka’s cheer, From faith to fight, we’ll shine the light, no globalist fear! With strength and pride, we’ll turn the tide, our soul’s unbound, Dance to the beat, clarinet’s heat, let truth’s groove be found! Hey! From borders shut to faith’s true gut, April twenty-seven to May third shines, Ho! Trump’s firm stand, across the land, foils globalist designs! Michigan’s roar to Germany’s core, our roots won’t bend, No Harvard’s scheme can break our dream, we’ll polka to the end! Drums and brass, guitar’s fast pass, our spirits never wrong, Hey! April’s spark to May’s true mark, we’ll keep it strong! No elite’s deceit, we’ll keep the beat, our roots hold long, Hey! Ho! Adjust Accordionly! Adjust Accordionly!News Headlines Covered: April 27 to May 3, 2025* DHS Locks Borders FastThe Department of Homeland Security implements stricter border controls, reducing unauthorized crossings. Enforcement efforts focus on enhancing public safety.* ICE Nabs Fugitive from IndiaImmigration and Customs Enforcement arrests an Indian national wanted for crimes, facilitating deportation. The operation aims to remove criminal elements from communities.* Election Order BlockedFederal judges block an executive order on election integrity, citing legal concerns. The ruling sparks debate over voting regulations.* No New Pope, DEI Hire ConsideredThe Vatican delays selecting a new pope, with discussions around diversity-focused candidates. The process raises questions about traditional papal selection criteria.* Trump Targets Law FirmsThe Trump administration imposes fines on law firms for alleged regulatory violations. Several firms file lawsuits in response, challenging the penalties.* Push to Withdraw from WTOU.S. officials advocate for withdrawing from the World Trade Organization, citing trade policy concerns. The proposal faces opposition from global trade partners.* Noem’s Anti-Christian Bias Task ForceGovernor Kristi Noem’s DHS task force launches to address perceived biases against Christian communities. The initiative seeks to protect religious freedoms.* Trump’s Michigan RallyFormer President Trump holds a rally in Michigan, marking 100 days of his administration’s focus on trade and border policies. Thousands attend the event.* NPR and PBS Funds ChoppedThe federal government cuts funding for NPR and PBS, citing concerns over editorial bias. Public media outlets face budget challenges as a result.* Truck Drivers Must Speak EnglishA new federal regulation requires truck drivers to demonstrate English proficiency. The rule aims to improve road safety and communication.* Shiloh HendrixShiloh Hendrix gains attention on X for comments challenging cultural narratives around race, sparking online debate. Her remarks draw significant engagement.* Tesla Dealerships VandalizedMultiple Tesla dealerships face vandalism and arson, linked to protests against Elon Musk’s political affiliations. Authorities investigate the incidents.* RFK Jr. Purges Public Health JobsRobert F. Kennedy Jr. oversees the elimination of over 20,000 public health positions, targeting pharmaceutical industry influence. The move prompts criticism from health advocates.* Germany Closes BordersGermany tightens border controls following a security incident, restricting asylum entries. The policy shift reflects growing European migration concerns.* WEF’s Klaus Schwab InvestigatedThe World Economic Forum investigates founder Klaus Schwab over allegations of misconduct. The inquiry could impact the organization’s leadership.* Harvard’s Tax Break ChallengedThe IRS challenges Harvard University’s tax-exempt status, questioning its financial practices. The university vows to defend its nonprofit standing.Thanks for reading Adjust Accordionly! Subscribe for free to receive new posts and support my work.Turn Back the WindrushForeigners out! England for the English! In ’48 the Windrush came; It’s foreign horde to stake a claim; A tide rolled in no strength to halt; To crack the heart of Britain’s vault They worked our lanes yet lit the spark; That plunged our land into the dark Turn back the Windrush, choke the flood; That drowned our home in alien blood; Hindsight mourns the West defiled; By stranger’s hands our soul exiled; The gates stayed wide the surge pressed on; Our will too weak, our courage gone; Now knives flash fast in city’s dread; Rape gangs hunt, where fear is bred Enoch was right his warning spurned; Our culture’s ash its embers burned Turn back the Windrush, choke the flood; That bathed our streets in English blood; Hindsight mourns, the West defiled; By stranger’s hands, our soul exiled We stood too soft our gates unbarred; Let chaos scar what once was starred; Now Starmer preens, a frail prim fool; His dainty reign too weak to rule Their numbers swell our end they weave; A doom no fight can now retrieve Windrush loosed the fatal stream; As Jean Raspail foretold in dream; With blades and screams, our streets now cry; The West lies broken, left to die; Mother England broken, left to die; Turn back the Windrush, choke the flood; Our streets run rivers of English blood; Hindsight mourns the West defiled; By stranger’s hands, our soul exiled Turn back the Windrush, choke the flood; That drowned our home in alien blood; Hindsight mourns the West defiled; By stranger’s hands… our soul exiled; By stranger’s hands… our soul exiled ole, ole-ole-ole! This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit accordion.substack.com