Zencare Podcast

“The wisdom of the Buddhas is infinitely profound and immeasurable... and that door is difficult to understand and difficult to enter when we believe our stories.”In this recent dharma talk, Koshin Sensei reflects on becoming an “assistant gardener” whose job is to sit zazen with the plants, learning to practice not just for ourselves, but with all beings.Drawing from the opening chapters of the Lotus Sutra, Koshin explores what it means to sit in the middle of life without excluding anything or anybody, even in the face of terminal illness, fear, and uncertainty.Through tender stories, including a friend facing death with curiosity and wonder, this talk illuminates how the wisdom of the Buddhas is “infinitely profound and immeasurable,” not something to understand intellectually but to embody.Koshin offers practical guidance on working with fear, releasing our stories, and practicing “soft belly” awareness rather than overthinking.‍MUSICHeart Sutra by Kanho Yakushiji – Buddhist priest and musician of the Rinzai sect and Imaji temple in Imabari, Japan. In 2003, he formed “KISSAQUO”, a songwriting duo based in Kyoto.‍NYZC PUBLICATIONSUntangled here: https://bit.ly/untangled-bookWholehearted: Slow Down, Help Out, Wake Up here: https://amzn.to/2JTKF1tAwake At The Bedside here: https://amzn.to/3aijXdL‍‍CONNECT WITH US—Instagram—Facebook—Donate

“When I forget who I am, I return to the Buddha. When I’m lost in confusion, I return to the Dharma. When I feel alone, I return to the Sangha.”In this tender and luminous talk, Chodo Sensei reflects on the Three Refuges of Buddhism—Buddha, Dharma, and Sangha—through the lens of impermanence, community, and compassion. With stories of accompanying his dear friend Rande in her final days, and reflections on awakening amid global unrest, Chodo reminds us that refuge is not found in escape, but in presence.To take refuge, he says, is to return, again and again, to what is real:the Buddha within each of us, the Dharma revealed in every moment, and the Sangha that holds us when life unravels.This talk invites us to wake up to grief, to change, to each other, and to remember that the path of practice is nothing less than the ongoing act of returning home.‍MUSICHeart Sutra by Kanho Yakushiji – Buddhist priest and musician of the Rinzai sect and Imaji temple in Imabari, Japan. In 2003, he formed “KISSAQUO”, a songwriting duo based in Kyoto.‍NYZC PUBLICATIONSUntangled here: https://bit.ly/untangled-bookWholehearted: Slow Down, Help Out, Wake Up here: https://amzn.to/2JTKF1tAwake At The Bedside here: https://amzn.to/3aijXdL‍‍CONNECT WITH US—Instagram—Facebook—Donate

“I love birthdays because they remind us: I was born, and I’m going to die. This is my one shot.”In this talk from his birthday this past Sunday, Koshin Sensei reflects on the gift of being alive and the simplicity of a nourishing life.Drawing on the teachings of Bodhidharma (who, legend has it, share's Koshin Sensei's birthday), he explores the four all-inclusive practices: suffering injustice, adapting to conditions, seeking nothing, and practicing the Dharma.Through humor, tenderness, and vivid stories—childhood friends reuniting in the zendo, watching the sunrise, creating our own suffering by dragging favorite stories out of the cupboard—Koshin reminds us that awakening begins in the ordinariness of our lives.What happens when we stop laying on the horn of our feelings and trust our actual experience rather than our preferences?Discover why feeling unimportant is liberating, and how to give your time and attention without needing recognition for it.

“The true way is not something bestowed by others... it is found in the depths of your own heart-mind.”On the 68th day of our recent Commit to Sit, Koshin Sensei reflects on teachings from Shakyamuni Buddha, Dogen Zenji, and Uchiyama Roshi, reminding us that practice never ends—not even for the great teachers.Through stories both profound and playful (including an unexpected giant Labubu doll appearing in the zendo), he challenges us to see failure not as weakness but as the essence of practice.How can we stop outsourcing our meaning to external forces, and to notice how often we grasp, like zombies, for validation instead of simply living?This talk invites us back to the simplicity of wholehearted practice, to embrace life as it is, and to rediscover freedom in letting go of the endless search for more.

“The discipline of zazen is the refusal to be manipulated by your own mind.”In this talk, Koshin Sensei reflects on the liberating power of discipline, the courage to make effort, and the serenity that comes not from outer conditions but from the clarity of mind itself. Drawing on the teachings of Shakyamuni Buddha, Dōgen Zenji, and Uchiyama Roshi, he explores how daily reverence for concentration allows the Dharma (wisdom) to flourish in our lives. From the story of Dōgen meeting the tenzo (head cook at a monastery) who walked 20 miles for mushrooms to the simple mirror-like nature of zazen, this talk invites us to return again and again to the freshness of the present moment.

"A boat without a rudder drifts with the current, sometimes slowly, sometimes quickly, but always away from the true shore."In this recent dharma talk, Koshin Sensei invites us to reflect deeply on what it means to “not lose sight of true dharma.” Drawing from Shakyamuni Buddha’s final teachings and Dogen Zenji’s commentary, Koshin reminds us that vigilance and effort are not punishments but the armor and encampment that protect us from distraction, defensiveness, and the pull of the senses. With humor and tenderness, he shows us how forgetting is simply the natural drift of an unmoored mind, and how remembering, again and again, brings us back to clarity, presence, and freedom.

“The challenge is not sustaining the silence (on retreat), but bringing the silence with you when you leave.”In this dharma talk from the final day of our recent summer silent retreat, Chodo sensei explores what it means to practice without seeking reward.Through the powerful story of 13th-century nun Mugai Nyodai, whose awakening came when the bottom fell out of her water bucket, and a poem by Marie Howe about a dog transfixed by moonlight, this talk explores mushotoku: the art of gaining nothing.Throughout the talk, Chodo weaves together intimate stories of caregiving, the challenges of spiritual ego, and the paradox of diligent effort (“shojin”) that aims to attain nothing. From cleaning a dying friend to a hospital chaplain learning to practice without robes, discover how true shojin means showing up fully present—not to become something, but to be with what is without clinging.

“Sangha (community) is not a retreat from suffering but a mirror to it.”In this lively and direct dharma talk, Koshin Sensei invites us to explore what it truly means to cultivate serenity and quietude; not as an escape from life’s messiness, but as a way of meeting it fully. Drawing on a Jataka (lives of the historical Buddha) tale of a hollow tree, teachings from our Zen ancestors, Dogen Zenji and Uchiyama Roshi, and reflections on the challenges and beauty of Sangha life, Koshin reminds us that impermanence is the very nature of awakening. True quietude, he says, is “settling down in the deepest meaning of your own life,” even when the winds are strong and the mud is thick. Rather than clinging to what appears sturdy or avoiding discomfort, we are invited to stay, to be changed by continuous practice (like robes slowly moistened by the mist) and to discover serenity right in the heart of our lives, together.

In this dharma talk, Koshin Sensei shares a day of stark contrasts: one meeting filled with praise — “You’re awesome, the best teacher” — followed by another with harsh criticism — “You’re the worst, no good, unhelpful.”How do we meet the swings between feeling wonderful and feeling terrible? How do we strive to “be on the right side of history” in a world that is both brutal and beautiful?Koshin invites us into Uchiyama Roshi’s teaching of Having Few Desires, exploring what it means to rest with dissatisfaction rather than trying to fix or erase it. As we are taught:“Gloom, anger, or offense can never be resolved by continually being gloomy, angry, or offended.Only by letting go of gloom, anger, or offense can those feelings subside.”We cannot simply swing to the opposite of what we’re feeling, Koshin says. Instead, we return to the practice of zazen (seated meditation); to seeing precisely and wholeheartedly.

“Zen is not interested in making us feel good. It is about being real. Sometimes this feels good. Sometimes this feels awful.”In this dharma talk, Koshin Sensei celebrates the graduates of our Contemplative Medicine Fellowship, reflects on the teachings of Dogen guiding our current ango period (Commit to Sit), and invites us to ask: What are the roots of goodness?It’s a question that feels both timely and timeless. Koshin reminds us that goodness means taking responsibility for who we are and how we live. We atone for our missteps, honor our resets, and stay in relationship — even when it’s uncomfortable.With gentle clarity, he encourages us to notice our cravings, our attachments to comfort, and the way they can obstruct connection — with ourselves and with others. May we meet this moment as we are. That is everything.

“How can I arouse the spirit of reconciliation and harmony right now?”In this recent dharma talk, Koshin Sensei invites us to reflect on what it means to truly grow up and live with wisdom. Quoting Uchiyama Roshi, the author of this summer Commit to Sit's guiding text, he reminds us that while we may look like adults, our hearts and our behavior often remain immature.Koshin also reflects on how, even in times of conflict and pain, we can choose harmony over division. After speaking with sangha members in Israel and Iran, both asking how not to create enemies, he encourages us to pause and ask ourselves: “How can I arouse the spirit of reconciliation and harmony right now?”May we have the courage to turn inward and live with greater peace.

When illness and loss touch our community, how can we transform uncertainty into deeper practice?In this recent dharma talk, Koshin Sensei explores how life's fragility can awaken rather than paralyze us. Drawing from Shakyamuni Buddha's third awareness, he reveals how we trap ourselves in narrow self-concepts and offers practice as the antidote.“Let the forms of the practice dismantle your self-image,” he guides, echoing Uchiyama Roshi's wisdom to “let go of the small self to realize the vastness of life itself.”Discover how to break free from the stories that keep you limited and step into true spaciousness.

“What would it be like to realize that you're not missing anything, that the brightness is not somewhere else and it's not someone else.”We share one final excerpt from last winter's Commit to Sit as the next 90-day summer practice period starts this Wednesday!In this talk, Koshin Sensei captures the essence of Zen practice through the lens of lineage and transmission. Speaking on the 90th day, he weaves together ancient wisdom stories with intimate personal reflections from his time training in Japan earlier this year.The talk centers on a profound paradox: how “setting down the small self” actually leads to greater intimacy and connection. Through stories of Buddha's flower-twirling at Vulture Peak and Bodhidharma's encounter with Emperor Wu, Koshin Sensei illustrates how genuine spiritual transmission happens not through concepts or credentials, but through complete presence and receptivity.He transforms lofty spiritual concepts into immediate, practical questions: How do we really receive what life offers us? Are we dividing up the world into what we like and don't like? Can we see the light that's already emanating “through every pore”?Koshin insists that awakening isn't somewhere else or for someone else—it's the “vivid alertness” available right now, in this moment, through whatever role we're given, whatever circumstances we face. This is Zen practice at its most immediate and heartfelt: not escape from the world, but complete engagement with it through the ancient practice of “turning the light inward” to illuminate what we've been missing all along.

“It’s one of the challenges of our school: to be prepared, and then to drop it.”What can a 13th-century Zen master teach us about the courage needed to challenge institutional barriers?This week, we continue to share excerpts from our winter Commit to Sit, with a talk from our dear dharma friend, Konjin Godwin, the abbot of the Houston Zen Center and Director of the International Division of Soto Zen.Konjin offers an intimate and accessible exploration of one of Zen's most influential figures, Eihei Dogen; revealing him not as a remote historical figure but as a “mild and peaceful” yet boldly revolutionary teacher whose thunder still roars today. Her talk illuminates Dogen's famous awakening moment in China when he heard his teacher say “studying Zen is the dropping off of body and mind,” leading to his profound realization.Particularly compelling is Konjin's focus on Dogen's radical stance on women's spiritual equality—extraordinary for medieval Japan. Through carefully selected quotes from Dogen's writings, we see a teacher who directly challenged the male-dominated Buddhist establishment, calling those who refused to learn from accomplished female teachers “close to beasts and far from Buddhism.”Her talk also explores the tension between solitary awakening and awakening within sangha (community), emphasizing how our practice is enriched by studying and honoring our ancestral lineage, not as dusty relics but as living teachings that continue to guide and challenge us.P.S. Connect with Konjin: If you enjoy the talk, Konjin will be one of the returning guest teachers for our Summer Commit to Sit (starting June 18th).

“My storehouse having burnt down, nothing obscures the view of the bright moon. All of our previous conceptions, our preferences, our ideas, our understandings of the way the world works have to go up in flames.”What happens when 40 years of perfect dedication still isn't enough?In this excerpt from her captivating talk at our Winter's Commit to Sit, Jisho Sara Siebert, of Zen Fields in Ames, Iowa, tells the remarkable story of Ananda—the Buddha's personal attendant who had a photographic memory, knew every teaching by heart, and served with unwavering devotion for four decades. Yet despite all his knowledge and service, something was still missing.Through Ananda's ancient story and her own experiences living in war-torn countries and practicing at historic temples in Japan, Jisho explores profound questions we all face: Why isn't intellectual understanding enough? What does it really mean to “let go”? And how do we move from simply repeating what we've learned to truly understanding it?This isn't just a Buddhist teaching—it's a universal story about the difference between knowing about something and actually experiencing it. Whether you're interested in personal growth, spiritual development, or simply love hearing transformative stories from across cultures and centuries, you'll find wisdom and inspiration in this accessible exploration of this profound moment of awakening.Jisho's warm, personal storytelling brings ancient wisdom into our modern lives, showing how an attendant's moment of clarity 2,500 years ago can illuminate our own journey toward understanding and peace.P.S. Connect with Jisho: If you enjoy the talk, Jisho will be one of the guest teachers for our Summer Commit to Sit (starting June 18th) and will also be offering her own Zen Study course through NYZC in the fall (more info & registration will be available soon).

What’s the difference between empathy and compassion—and why does it matter so deeply for those in caregiving professions?In this moving and insightful conversation, our Guiding Teachers Koshin Paley Ellison and Chodo Robert Campbell sit down with Dr. Judson Brewer, renowned psychiatrist, neuroscientist, bestselling author, and faculty member of the Contemplative Medicine Fellowship.Together, they explore the nuanced terrain of emotional presence, personal boundaries, burnout, and healing—both personal and collective.Drawing from clinical research, Buddhist psychology, personal stories, and decades of experience in contemplative and medical education, the conversation opens with a core distinction: empathy as the capacity to feel another’s pain, and compassion as the act of being with suffering without being consumed by it. Through real-world examples, they illuminate how unchecked empathy can lead to exhaustion, resentment, or disconnection, while compassion—rooted in curiosity, humility, and care—becomes a practice that sustains rather than depletes.They speak candidly about what it means to “take suffering home,” the toll of hero culture in medicine, and how unexamined habit loops can reinforce burnout. And they reflect on how true community—a circle of care and connection—is not a luxury, but a necessary medicine. Whether you’re a clinician, chaplain, caregiver, or simply someone walking with others through difficult times, this episode offers deep insight into how we might care with more courage, clarity, and joy.Learn more about Contemplative Medicine/Care→ May 21st: We'll be hosting a free online info session for our Contemplative Medicine Fellowship. All physicians, advanced practice registered nurses, and PAs are invited to learn more about the program and apply for our fifth cohort!→ June 4th: We'll also be hosting a free online info session for our Foundations in Contemplative Care program, now in its 18th year! Anyone interested in integrating their spiritual practice with service in the world is invited to learn more and apply. → September 24th – 28th: Our annual Contemplative Care Retreat held at the Garrison Institute will be led by Koshin Sensei, Chodo Sensei, Ayo Yetunde, Dan and Bianca Harris, and other guest teachers to be announced soon. Whether you are new to meditation and integrating spiritual practice with care or you are an experienced practitioner needing reinvigoration, this retreat is for you. The retreat also serves as a reunion for alumni of our Foundations in Contemplative Care and Contemplative Medicine Fellowship programs. 

Each of us is carrying so much—lugging around feelings and stories of deficiency, blame, or unworthiness. How can what we carry no longer separate us, but instead become the very ground of connection?In this poignant dharma talk, Koshin Sensei reflects on the life of Jianzhi Sengcan, the 30th ancestor after Shakyamuni Buddha, who bore the visible burden of leprosy and the invisible weight of shame. At age 40, he approached his teacher Huike and pleaded, “Cleanse me of my wrongdoing.” What followed was an intimate encounter of great healing—and the heart of Zen practice.Koshin invites us to pause and ask: What is the story I’ve been living in? What am I still carrying that keeps me from being truly present? He reminds us that it is not enough to simply be aware of our suffering. Liberation comes when we learn to put down our story and take refuge in the Buddha, the Dharma, and the Sangha—not as abstract ideals, but as living, breathing relationships that can hold us in the midst of struggle.

In this powerful and poignant talk from the midst of our Commit to Sit practice period, Koshin Sensei explores the teachings of Punyamitra, the 26th ancestor in the Zen lineage. As a crown prince seeking home-leaving, Punyamitra is asked by his teacher: “What must you do?” His answer—“I must do Buddha’s work”—echoes through the centuries as a timeless call to presence, compassion, and responsibility. Koshin challenges us to examine what ordinary habits we are willing to set down and how we might take up the work of awakening with more precision, more kindness, and more courage. With personal stories, humor, and deep reverence for the lineage, this talk offers an invitation to return to this moment—and to discover what is possible when we let go of our tightly held stories.

Spanish philosopher, José Ortega y Gasset once remarked: “Tell me what you pay attention to and I will tell you who you are.”A capacity to pay attention grows as we continually practice being receptive to what is happening within and around us. How do you pay attention to life? What holds you back from fully receiving reality as it is?In this recent dharma talk, Koshin Sensei emphasizes the important of attention and the way of awakening.Too often, he says, we indulge the thoughts, fantasies, excuses of our small minds instead of being receptive to what is directly available to us.This overindulgence keeps us from actually changing and truly experiencing freedom. Maturity means taking responsibility for how we are participating in life.We can learn from our Soto Zen ancestors how to live an expansive life, not a little one; how to ask big questions and practice unbounded receptivity to this vibrating, excruciating, beautiful, ordinary, and wild life. 

‍In this recent dharma talk from our winter silent retreat, Koshin Sensei offers teachings on the eve of the Hossenshiki ceremony, a rare occasion in which a teacher entrusts their head student, the Shuso, to give a dharma talk before the sangha.‍This tradition, known as Honsaku Gyocha, reflects the deep process of training, trust, and surrender at the heart of Zen practice.‍The talk focuses on Case #2 from The Book of Serenity—Bodhidharma’s famous exchange with Emperor Wu:‍"What is the highest meaning of the holy truths?""Empty—there is no holy.""Who are you facing me?""Don’t know."‍This powerful koan is often seen as what makes Zen, Zen, revealing why we sit zazen facing the wall and the radical nature of Bodhidharma’s teaching. Koshin Sensei reflects on recognition and humility, the tension between wanting acknowledgment and letting go, and the lifelong practice of meeting the moment as it is—without clinging to status or certainty.‍How do we learn to trust what is already here? How do we let go of how we wish things were and meet life with dignity, care, and compassion? With warmth, humor, and deep encouragement, Koshin reminds us that Zen practice is about showing up—imperfect, caring, lively, and human.‍Listen now to explore what it means to embrace the unknown and walk the path of practice with an open heart.‍‍MUSICHeart Sutra by Kanho Yakushiji – Buddhist priest and musician of the Rinzai sect and Imaji temple in Imabari, Japan. In 2003, he formed “KISSAQUO”, a songwriting duo based in Kyoto.‍NYZC PUBLICATIONSUntangled here: https://bit.ly/untangled-bookWholehearted: Slow Down, Help Out, Wake Up here: https://amzn.to/2JTKF1tAwake At The Bedside here: https://amzn.to/3aijXdL‍CONNECT WITH US—Instagram—Facebook—X (Twitter)—Donate‍