Glaswegians Anonymous

In this landmark 30th episode, the boys are joined by a man who knows exactly what it takes to reach the top of the mountain: British and Commonwealth Featherweight Champion, Nathaniel Collins.Nathaniel takes us behind the curtain of the professional fight game, and it’s not all glitz and gold belts. We’re talking about the mental and physical torture of "the cut"—that brutal period before a fight where every calorie is a memory and the obsession with food reaches fever pitch.From dreaming about "scran" to the legendary first meal post-fight, Nathaniel gets real about the sacrifices made in camp. We also take a trip down memory lane to the lockdown days, where Nathaniel was busy putting Darren through his paces (and wondering if he'd survive the session).Plus, we tackle a classic Glasgow phenomenon: Why is it that every guy in a local pub, after two pints, thinks they can puff their chests out and have a "square go" with a professional fighter?On the menu this week:• The Hunger Games: The psychological warfare of making weight.• The Food Obsession: What happens when you can’t stop thinking about a cheeseburger.• Lockdown Drills: Training Darren when the world was shut down.• Glasgow "Hardmen": Dealing with the egos who think they can take a pro.• The Big Stage: Looking ahead to the massive upcoming fight at the OVO Hydro.Whether you're a boxing fanatic or just here for the patter, this is an elite-level chat with one of the city's finest athletes.Follow Nathaniel:Insta: https://www.instagram.com/nathanielcollins/?hl=enTiktok: https://www.tiktok.com/@nathanielcollins3?SUBSCRIBE TO OUR PATREON - patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymousDon't forget to Like, Subscribe, and hit the Bell icon so you never miss a square go.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2lang=en#GlaswegiansAnonymous #NathanielCollins #GlasgowPodcast #ScottishBoxing #NewEpisode #PodcastScotland #GlasgowLife

In this week’s episode, Gary and Darren dive into a chaotic mix of rural life, questionable grooming habits, and high-stakes football tension.Here’s what the lads are getting into:• Farm Life & Nostalgia: Gary shares his experience going lambing, leading into a deep dive on how childhood has changed since "back in the day."• The Tech Struggle: A congested Darren explains why he ended up signing up for his own Patreon just to watch a video, while the guys officially introduce the new Patreon tiers.• Football Fever: Gary relives his favorite goal against Celtic from the weekend, and they look ahead to the Rangers v Celtic Scottish Cup game—which they’ll be watching live with you on Patreon!• Health & Hazards: Between Gary’s blood test results and some highly suspicious nose-hair waxing methods, the health chat is... questionable at best.• The Hollywood Rabbit Hole: Why Gary wants to talk about the war (and Darren doesn't), the theory that Jim Carrey is a clone, and a look back at their favorite Jim Carrey movies.• School Days & Big Shoes: Memories of the "dinner ticket" era at primary school, and a serious debate on whether they’d accept a career change to become the next Ronald McDonald.• Jealousy & Wings: Gary gets honest about his "friendship jealousy" over Darren hanging out with other comedians, all while they prep for the Open Goal Wings Challenge.JOIN THE CLAN: We’re officially on Patreon! Want to watch the Old Firm with us this weekend and get exclusive bonus content?patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymousDon't forget to Like, Subscribe, and hit the Bell icon so you never miss a square go.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishComedy #GlasgowLife #NewEpisode #ScottishPodcast

Welcome back to another chaotic episode of Glaswegians Anonymous. This week, the fitness regime has taken a bit of a turn, the nostalgia is hitting hard, and Darren’s social calendar is causing some serious domestic tension in the studio.On this week’s madness:• The King of Pop (via Greenock): Darren makes the pilgrimage to see a Michael Jackson tribute act. Let’s just say the moonwalk hits different when you’re down the water.• "Sit Doon or Get Rooted": A near-confrontation with a woman who refused to take her seat. Is it even a night out in Scotland if someone doesn't almost get offered a square go over basic etiquette?• Jolly Giant Nostalgia: Gary takes us on a trip down memory lane to the 90s. If you didn’t spend your childhood sprinting through the aisles of the Jolly Giant, did you even grow up in Glasgow?• The Wings of Death: The boys are prepping for the Open Goal Hot Wings Challenge next week. Expect tears, sweat, and immediate regret.• Big Dunc FOMO: Darren is off to see the legend Duncan Ferguson. Gary is handling the news with his usual grace (meaning he’s absolutely ragin’ and full of FOMO).• The Barras Vlog: We’re planning a trip to the iconic Barras market. Get ready for some high-quality content featuring knock-off gear and world-class patter.🚨 SUPPORT THE SHOW 🚨We’ve officially launched our Patreon! If you want to support the nonsense and get access to exclusive perks, get yourself over to:👉 Patreon.com/glaswegiansanonymousDon't forget to Like, Subscribe, and hit the Bell icon so you never miss a square go.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishComedy #GlasgowLife #NewEpisode #ScottishPodcast

Back with another week of madness with Darren & Gary:The Comedy Grind: Gary is officially "going demented" with full-time comedy. Between forgetting when the schools are off and showing up late, the lifestyle is clearly taking its toll.• The Digital Traitor: Hear how Gary used AI to create a cursed image of Charlie Mulgrew in a Rangers top. Is nothing sacred anymore?• Stage & Screen: Darren celebrates his Scottish BAFTA nomination (no big deal!) and looks back on attending Gary’s first-ever tour show in Paisley.• Touring Troubles: The boys get real about the press coverage surrounding Darren’s cancelled tour dates and his big move back into the wild world of crowd work shows.• The Random Bits: * Why was Gary at a Panto in February?• The ethics of "content creators" pinching ideas.• A debate on their absolute favourite rooms to play in Glasgow.• The Finale: We finally address the mystery of the Pickle Jar Incident.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishComedy #GlasgowLife #NewEpisode #ScottishPodcast

In this week’s chaotic installment of Glaswegians Anonymous, Gary and Darren prove that 9:00 AM is an ungodly hour for two comedians with ADHD to be operating heavy machinery (or even a microphone).From career milestones to hypothetical cellmates, the boys cover:• The 9:00 AM Struggle: An honest look at the brain fog and executive dysfunction that hits when you try to be funny before the caffeine kicks in.• Going Pro: Big news as Gary officially goes full-time with comedy. The lads discuss the leap of faith and what life looks like without a "real" job.• Behind Bars: The unique energy of performing jail gigs. Is it the toughest crowd in Scotland, or just the most honest one?• Cellmate Romance: With February in the air, the boys imagine a very specific Valentine's Day scenario: what would life look like if Gary and Darren were sharing a cell? (Spoiler: It’s not pretty, but it’s probably hilarious).• Glee Club Chaos: Darren breaks down a recent battle with hecklers at Glasgow’s Glee Club and the art of shutting down the front row without losing the room."Doing a podcast at 9am with ADHD isn't a broadcast, it's a wellness check."Listen now on your favorite platform!#GlaswegiansAnonymous #ScottishComedy #GlasgowLife #NewEpisode #ScottishPodcast

Episode 25 is coming at you live from the heart of the Barras! We set up shop in Smokey Trotter’s Kitchen with a list of audience suggestions and zero self-control.In true Darren and Gary fashion, the "plan" goes out the window within minutes as the boys spiral into a series of mad tangents involving childhood lofts, questionable grooming habits, and a smell Gary will never forget.The Highlights (or Lowlights):• The Ultimate Swerve: We managed to avoid all political chat by dodging Donald Trump entirely—somehow replacing him with a deep dive into Screech from Saved by the Bell.• The "Mary Doll" Collision: Gary recounts his brush with Scottish comedy royalty and the time he nearly ended Elaine C. Smith.• The Loft Years: Darren opens up about being the "hidden child" and getting locked away in the loft.• The Taste of Fear: Gary describes a fart at one of his gigs so potent he didn't just smell it—he actually tasted it.• A Very Sensitive Pre-Date: Darren shares the harrowing story of using Veet on his "special areas" before a big night out.• Diagnosis & Brine: Darren updates us on his autism test and proves that his pickle obsession is now officially a lifestyle choice.• The Dark Web of the Audience: We look into the weirdest porn habits suggested by you lot. (Get help, seriously.)• Death Row Dinners: What would your final meal be? The boys debate the essential last munch.• Cameo Chaos: The absurdity of buying videos from washed-up celebrities.Keep Up With The Madness:📍 Location: Huge thanks to Smokey Trotter’s Kitchen at the Barras for the hospitality and the best scran in the city.🔔 Subscribe: Hit that button and turn on notifications. It’s the only way to keep Gary out of the loft.#GlaswegianAnonymous #SmokeyTrotters #TheBarras #GlasgowLive #ScottishPodcast #DarrenAndGary #VeetDisasters

In this week’s episode of Glaswegians Anonymous, Gary and Darren take a deep dive into the chaotic spectrum of modern life—ranging from international warfare to the local chippy.The lads don’t hold back as they tackle the heavy hitters and the high-protein hitters, covering:• The Thin Blue Line: A heated debate on whether the police should be armed. Is it time for Glocks on the Gallowgate, or are we better off without?• The "Station" Experience: From the awkwardness of encounters with the law to the high-stakes mission of retrieving a Young Scot card from the local station.• The Rise of the Machines: Darren and Gary share their latest chats with ChatGPT. Are we looking at a digital revolution or just a fancy way to argue with a toaster?• The Paranormal & The Political: Do ghosts exist, or is it just the wind in the tenement? Plus, a look at "Trump’s Board of Peace" and the terrifyingly unlikely (but let’s discuss it anyway) prospect of America invading the UK.• Gary’s Personal Crisis: Between eating a takeaway every single day and a spiraling case of death anxiety, Gary wonders if he’ll meet the ghosts he doesn't believe in sooner than expected.It’s raw, it’s unfiltered, and it’s pure Glasgow.Where to listenAvailable now on all major platforms. Tune in for the patter, stay for the existential dread.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

Buckle up, because this week Darren and Gary are diving into the deep end of the "too much information" pool. In an episode that swings wildly from the medical to the geopolitical, no topic is too taboo (or too messy) for the lads to tackle.Inside This Episode:• The Deep Clean: Darren gives us a blow-by-blow account of his recent colonic irrigation. From the clinical dignity of the waiting room to the... less dignified reality of the procedure, find out if he’s feeling lighter or just traumatized.• The Private Life: The boys get uncomfortably honest about their preferred "solitary habits." We find out exactly where the magic happens (or doesn't) in a conversation that'll make you want to bleach your headphones.• The Trump Doctrine: Switching gears to the Leader of the Free World, the lads discuss the 47th President’s bizarre foreign policy ambitions—specifically, his recurring dream of invading Greenland. Is it a real estate play or just a very cold ego trip?• The Golden Arches Diet: Finally, we break down the secret to presidential longevity: a strict regimen of Big Macs and Diet Coke. Is it the ultimate power move, or is his blood type just "Special Sauce" at this point?Warning: Contains strong language, graphic medical descriptions, and opinions that definitely haven't been fact-checked by anyone, anywhere.Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

Buckle up for another chaotic shift with the Glaswegians Anonymous crew! This week, Gary and Darren are trading the microphones for aprons—or at least they’re dreaming about it.Here’s what’s cooking in Episode 22:• The Roll of a Lifetime: Following the legendary Morton’s rolls saga, Gary and Darren discuss their newfound ambition to become the city’s next top bakers.• The Ultimate Filling: We settle the debate once and for all—what is the definitive, non-negotiable filling for a crispy Morton’s roll?• New Year, Same Gary: It’s resolution season, and Gary is already over it. He breaks down exactly why he hates them (mostly because he can’t keep them) and the boys share their most successful—and disastrous—attempts at "self-improvement."• Extreme Diets: Gary announces his plan to attempt a 40-day fast, while Darren reminisces about the time he went full Christian Bale and attempted The Machinist diet.• Getting Personal: Things take a turn for the "distinctly Glaswegian" as the boys get honest about the weirdest things they’ve ever had to use when the toilet roll ran out.Warning: This episode contains high-carb dreams, low-calorie nightmares, and some very questionable bathroom habits.Listen now on your favorite platform!Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

The boys are back for the first sit-down of 2026, and let’s just say the festive period has left its mark—mostly on Gary’s waistline and Darren’s ego.In this episode, Gary and Darren dissect the chaos of Christmas and New Year. While Darren has emerged looking suspiciously "fresh" (leading to an investigation into his new glow), Gary is mostly just recovering from a dairy-induced coma.What’s on the menu:• The Transformation: Darren is looking good, feeling good, and hitting the boxing training hard. Is he the next world champ or just the fittest guy at the bus stop?• The Cheese Board Incident: Gary admits to polishing off an entire cheese board solo, but the real tragedy is his botanical knowledge—apparently, he’s been eating chives thinking they were shamrocks.• The Country has Changed: Gary gets philosophical (and a bit worried) about the state of the nation. It’s not the Scotland he remembers, and he’s got thoughts.• Derby Day Drama: The dust has settled on the Old Firm / Glasgow Derby, and the boys weigh in on the result that has half the city celebrating and the other half hiding under their duvets.• Square Gos: In a bold move that absolutely nobody asked for, Darren explains why he’s ready to take Amy Macdonald and Richard Foster in a square go.It’s a high-energy start to the year filled with questionable fitness advice, botanical errors, and the usual West Coast nonsense.Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

The mics are hot and the filters are off. 🎙️🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿In Part 2 of our live special, we’re diving into the Glaswegians Anonymous Podcast. After the stand-up tension has cleared, [Name] and [Guest Name] sit down to discuss the absolute state of the city, listener confessions, and the kind of stories that can only happen in Glasgow.Expect:• Deep dives into Glasgow culture.• Live Q&A and "Anonymous" submissions from the night.• The stories we couldn't tell in the stand-up set.

The front row thought they were safe—they were wrong. 🎤💥Welcome to Part 1 of Glaswegians Anonymous Live, recorded at [Insert Venue Name, e.g., The Glee Club/Rotunda]. In this set, it’s all about the audience. From questionable career choices to chaotic nights out in the West End, no stone is left unturned as [Name] takes on the best (and worst) of the Glasgow crowd.In this video:• The art of the Glasgow heckle.• Why you should never tell a comedian where you work.• Pure, unscripted chaos.

Merry Christmas from the city where the "Star of Bethlehem" is usually just a police helicopter! This week, Darren and Gary tuck into a festive feast of nonsense, regret, and questionable spiritual enlightenment.The boys start by dissecting the unique misery of staring at a turkey dinner while coming down, before reminiscing about the last-minute chaos of the Barras on Christmas Eve. Gary opens up about his newfound love for Jesus, which leads to an invitation to the (very real?) ‘Super God Comedy Squad’ retreat.Highlights of the Holiday Chaos:• The Big Question: Would Gary actually agree to baptise Darren?• The Clyde Ritual: A debate on the logistics of "bare bum baptisms" in Glasgow’s freezing river.• A Field in the Dark: Gary recounts a mysterious encounter that definitely wasn't a Christmas miracle.• Divine Surveillance: A terrifying reminder that God is always watching... even when you’re "enjoying yourself" alone.• Festive Logistics: How to rinse Costco for every free sample available to man.They also tackle the highs and lows of the season, from the best and worst presents they’ve ever received to the pain of family members not showing up to comedy gigs (and Gary’s habit of being a nightmare in the front row when he’s the one in the audience).Whether you’re heading to Midnight Mass or just hiding from your relatives, grab a drink and join the boys for the least holy Christmas special in Scotland.Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

It’s the pre-Christmas special, and the festive stress is officially kicking in!On this week’s Glaswegians Anonymous, we are breaking down the absolute chaos of the season. Gary is gearing up to take the kids away for Christmas (pray for him), and we discuss why the Christmas Market at the Four Corners is currently the wildest place on earth.We also dive into the big ambitions for the year ahead. Gary’s got the vision board out for 2026, he’s practicing The Magic, and he’s trying to manifest his way to millions using The Secret—unfortunately, nobody told HMRC that positive vibes don't pay the bill.Plus, we break down that horrific World Cup draw, the dream of obtaining the mythical Irn-Bru Carnival Black Card, and what happened when Gary dragged Darren to church.In this episode:• 🎅 Festive Fear: Gary taking the weans on holiday.• 🎡 Carnival Dreams: The campaign for the Irn-Bru Carnival VIP Black Card starts here.• ⚽ World Cup Woes: Reaction to the draw (why is it always us?).• 🙏 Holy Moly: Gary takes Darren to church.• 🔮 Manifestation vs Reality: Vision boards, The Secret, and why the Taxman doesn't care about your frequency.Grab a mulled wine (or a stiff drink) and get involved.Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

The boys are back! Darren is officially surviving the flu, which gives him just enough energy to roast Gary for his latest confession: he used to have Boobs.In this episode:• Gary almost dies on stage in Aberdeen (literally). 💀• Darren deals with a serious clown problem. 🤡• We break down Gary’s bakery order. 🥐• The dreaded "leakage" after a slash. 💦• And finally... the story of Darren and the "Turbo Glup Glup" in Amsterdam. Don't ask, just listen.Get it in yer ears! 🎧Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2

WE ARE BACK! And we are still buzzing from the absolute scenes at the Glee Club!Episode 15 is a massive recap of our sold-out live show in Glasgow. If you were there, you know it was pure chaos from start to finish. If you weren't, get this watched to see what you missed.We break down the best moments of the night, the mad atmosphere, and the banter that could only happen in Glasgow.ALSO IN THIS EPISODE:Darren makes a massive announcement that has left us all confused. He’s officially boycotted online "content." That’s right—no more WiFi required. He’s gone proper old school and admits he’s now strictly using catalogues for his... personal time. The Next Directory has never been in so much danger.Expect the usual mad banter, roasting, and absolute nonsense.Like, Comment, and Subscribe if you want more mayhem.🎟️ Tickets for the next show: https://www.sec.co.uk/events/detail/glaswegians-anonymous-live-ep2#GlaswegianAnonymous #glasgow #gleeclub #scottishcomedy #LiveShow #podcast #banter

YES! IT ACTUALLY HAPPENED! 🏆On this week's episode of Glaswegians Anonymous, Gary and Darren are absolutely buzzing after Tuesday night's historic result. Scotland has officially qualified for the World Cup, and the boys are here to break down the scenes, the celebrations, and what this means for the Tartan Army.It’s getting nostalgic as the guys look back at the squad from 1998 the last time we made it to the big stage. Can we top that party this time around?Plus: In a massive curveball, we have a hilarious surprise chat involving the legend that is Marti Pellow and... Gary’s mum? You do not want to miss this piece of podcast gold.In this episode:• 🏴󠁧󠁢󠁳󠁣󠁴󠁿 Scotland qualifies for the World Cup!• 🍻 Recapping the Tuesday night madness.• 🏙️ Throwback: George Square & France '98.• 🎤 The Marti Pellow & Gary’s Mum situation.Like, Subscribe, and let us know in the comments: Where were you when that goal hit the back of the net?#GlaswegiansAnonymous #GaryFaulds #DarrenConnell #Scotland #TartanArmy #WorldCup #ScotlandNationalTeam #GeorgeSquare #MartiPellow #GlasgowComedy #ScottishFootball #NoScotlandNoParty #Podcast #Glasgow

This week, the lads confess all. Darren and Gary take a trip down memory lane to revisit every mental, desperate, and downright daft diet they’ve ever attempted.Then, they get real about the present state of affairs: Darren's on a new journey, smashing boxing training three times a week, while Gary reveals why he’s officially chucked the Mounjaro.This Podcast is Brought to you by - Smokey Trotters KitchenOrder on DeliverooEat in the OG down the BarrasFollow here - https://www.instagram.com/smokeytrotterskitchen?igsh=MWpuano5OG16NGI4Ng==#glasgow #scottishpodcast #diets #boxing #podcast #comedypodcast #glasgowlife #glasgowbanter #scottishcomedy #scotland

Remember when Bonfire Night in Glasgow was a different kind of wild?This week, Gary and Darren dive into the smoky archives of their memories to talk all things Guy Fawkes. They look back at what Bonfire Night was really like "back in the day" compared to the organised displays of today.From the massive, legendary bonfires down Glasgow Green to the pure chaos of folk shooting fireworks at each other in the street, the lads leave no stone unturned. Was it better, or was it just madness?Join the boys for another dose of hilarious stories, proper Glasgow nostalgia, and a chat about how much things have (or haven't) changed.New episodes of Glaswegians Anonymous out every week!LIVE SHOW ANNOUNCEMENT!We're taking the podcast to the stage! Join us for a special live recording of Glaswegians Anonymous at The Glee Club in Glasgow this November. It's going to be a brilliant night of stories and laughs.Tickets are on sale now – grab yours before they're gone!Book here: https://booking.glee.co.uk/22908This Podcast is Brought to you by - Smokey Trotters KitchenOrder on DeliverooEat in the OG down the BarrasFollow here - https://www.instagram.com/smokeytrotterskitchen?igsh=MWpuano5OG16NGI4Ng==#GlaswegiansAnonymous #BonfireNight #GuyFawkes #Glasgow #ScottishPodcast #GlasgowComedy #BackInTheDay #Nostalgia #GlasgowGreen #ScottishComedy #GaryFaulds #DarrenConnell

Prepare for liftoff... or something.This week, Darren and Gary are talking all things extraterrestrial. We get into the mysterious "3i atlas," Gary’s personal relationship with both aliens and God (aye, really), and the most important question of all:If aliens landed in Glesga, where would you take them for the ultimate day out?From the deep unknown to the best tourist traps, it's a cosmic one.LIVE SHOW ANNOUNCEMENT!We're taking the podcast to the stage! Join us for a special live recording of Glaswegians Anonymous at The Glee Club in Glasgow this November. It's going to be a brilliant night of stories and laughs.Tickets are on sale now – grab yours before they're gone!Book here: https://booking.glee.co.uk/22908This Podcast is Brought to you by - Smokey Trotters KitchenOrder on DeliverooEat in the OG down the BarrasFollow here - https://www.instagram.com/smokeytrotterskitchen?igsh=MWpuano5OG16NGI4Ng==#GlaswegiansAnonymous #Glasgow #Aliens #ScottishPodcast #ComedyPodcast #UFO #DayOutInGlasgow