That's Where I'm At

In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura interviews Lisa Hawkins — a Dating & Relationship Coach who empowers men and women to thrive in their relationships. With over 30 years of experience, Lisa has dedicated her life to understanding the intricacies of human connection and what truly makes relationships flourish. Her personal journey, marked by challenges, growth, and deep spiritual awareness, has given her a profound understanding of the obstacles individuals face in their search for love, healing, and self-discovery. Lisa shares her story of overcoming generational trauma, abuse, and the difficult process of recovering after an abusive marriage. The conversation explores the struggle of recognizing and trusting your instincts, the impact of societal conditioning, and the non-linear nature of healing. Lisa also offers practical guidance on self-awareness, journaling, and cultivating self-love. Together, she and Laura highlight the importance of compassion, patience, and honoring your unique path. Listeners are encouraged to embrace their own journeys and seek support as they reclaim their lives.   Key Topics & Timestamps Lisa's Background and Unconscious Family Conditioning (00:02:33) Lisa shares her upbringing in a toxic, unconscious family and how it led to abusive relationships. Experiences of Oppression and Lack of Boundaries (00:03:42) Lisa describes being raised to be agreeable, lacking boundaries, and early experiences of abuse. Immediate Regret After Marriage (00:06:52) Lisa recalls knowing she made a mistake hours after marrying, but feeling trapped by religion. Life in an Abusive Marriage (00:07:32) Lisa details her ten-year marriage, cycles of leaving and returning, and escalation of abuse. Barriers to Leaving Abusive Relationships (00:09:09) Lisa and Laura discuss why leaving abuse is complex, including privilege and safety concerns. The Long Healing Journey (00:14:12) Lisa shares that her healing has spanned 30 years, involving unraveling trauma and conditioning. Visible Healing and Personal Growth (00:16:15) Laura and Lisa reflect on how healing manifests outwardly and the unseen hard work behind it. Reacting vs. Responding and the Limits of Clichés (00:19:10) Discussion on the difference between reacting and responding, and why healing isn't as simple as memes suggest. Being vs. Doing in Healing (00:23:23) Lisa emphasizes the importance of being present and authentic in the healing process. Journaling and Pattern Recognition (00:26:04) Lisa recommends journaling to track feelings and patterns, aiding in rebuilding self-trust. Lisa's Podcast and Coaching Work (00:28:54) Lisa introduces her podcast "Conscious Insights" and describes her coaching clientele.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Lisa, 'That was the pivoting point in my life where I hit absolute bottom. There was absolutely nothing left of me.'Lisa, 'Some part of me, the fighter in me, came up and said, I'm not going to let this define me, and I will overcome it.'Lisa, 'Sometimes the emotions are more than what our bodies and brain and nervous system can take, and we become numb because that's the only way we can survive.'Lisa, 'There was a lot of conditioning that I wasn't aware of when I started the journey that was given to me from generations that I've had to unravel.'Lisa, 'There are times when I'm still learning to trust my gut, and I've been doing this for a long time.'   RESOURCES: COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura YOU'RE NOT CRAZY ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE JOIN THE NICE GUY RECOVERY COMMUNITY: https://www.skool.com/nice-guy-recovery-community-1517 Connect with Lisa www.consciouslyawakecounseling.com https://consciouslyawakecounseling.com/about-me/ Lisa Hawkins Dating & Relationship Coach - https://www.facebook.com/ConsciouslyAwakeCoun Consciously Awake Counseling https://www.instagram.com/consciouslyawakecounseling/ Amazon KDP Ebook The Awakening by Lisa Hawkins : https://a.co/d/cQAua5o Conscious Insights Podcast: https://open.spotify.com/show/4YZ3Dl30yDsNfMuHBvtkgK?si=db73a25f188b4a6b   "Healing begins the moment you stop ignoring your instincts and start trusting your truth." Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura welcomes Beth M. Jones—an International Speaker, Author of 30 books, and podcaster. Beth is the wife of fire chief Ray, mom to three beautiful daughters (Heather, Eden, and Leah), and has two adorable cats. She helps women step out of fear into faith by sharing her story and the freedom we have in Jesus. Beth believes we should dream big because we serve a big God! Beth shares her powerful journey from childhood abuse and toxic relationships to healing and faith. She discusses overcoming trauma, recognizing red flags in abusive relationships, and the importance of self-worth and support. Drawing on her own experiences and faith in Jesus, Beth encourages women to step out of fear and embrace their unique purpose. The episode offers hope, practical insights, and resources for women seeking freedom and transformation.   Key Topics & Timestamps Beth's Motivation to Help Women (00:02:47) Beth explains how her childhood experiences inspired her to help women step out of fear into faith. Cinderella as a Metaphor for Unique Purpose (00:04:02) Beth discusses her connection to Cinderella, relating it to abuse and dreaming big. Beth's Childhood Abuse and Early Escape (00:05:03) Beth shares her experiences of childhood abuse and her desire to leave home as a teenager. Short-Lived First Marriage and Divorce (00:08:08) Beth talks about her brief first marriage, the birth of her daughter, and eventual separation. Post-Divorce Partying and Delayed Healing (00:11:13) Beth admits to partying and not focusing on self-improvement until much later in life. Journalism Career and Second Marriage (00:12:28) Beth describes her journalism internship, meeting her second husband, and his initial charm. Escalating Abuse and Financial Dependence (00:22:07) Beth describes the onset of her husband's temper, walking on eggshells, and feeling trapped financially. Physical Abuse Toward Beth's Daughter (00:28:26) Beth recounts her husband's violence toward her daughter, a medical emergency, and moving to escape. Trauma Bonding and Self-Doubt (00:35:06) Beth and Laura discuss trauma bonding, self-esteem issues, and the difficulty of breaking free from abuse. Beginning the Healing Journey (00:36:41) Beth starts counseling after her husband leaves, experiences panic attacks, and begins healing with her daughter. Therapy, Journaling, and Recovery (00:38:04) Beth describes the impact of therapy, journaling, and addressing compounded childhood trauma. Overcoming Fear and Embracing Public Speaking (00:41:04) Beth shares her initial fear of public speaking and how she learned to "do it afraid." Travel, Growth, and Encouraging Others (00:42:54) Beth discusses international speaking, personal growth, and encouraging others to pursue their dreams.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Beth, 'It stems from my own life experiences, things I went through in childhood, and I just have a passion for women to dream big and be all that God created them to be.' Beth, 'I can't say the marriage was a mistake because out of that marriage came my beautiful, precious daughter, Heather.' Beth, 'I think I always was looking for that love, that unconditional love that we want from someone.' Beth, 'I would try to please him and there wasn't pleasing him. I just felt that tension around him and I began to notice that temper.' Beth, 'Because of my childhood abuse, I didn't have the confidence in myself and value myself enough to know this is not good. This is not right. I should not be with this man.' Beth, 'I started going once a week, and I began to deal with all the pain and the trauma in my life, and it really helped me just to talk it out with a trusted person.' Beth, 'We do it afraid, just like you said. We do it afraid out of obedience to God, but just to give people hope and encourage others.'   RESOURCES: RESOURCES: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/resources COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura SELF WORTH RESET MINI COURSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse YOU'RE NOT CRAZY ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE Connect with Beth https://www.BethJones.net Amazon Author Page: https://www.amazon.com/author/bethmjones Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/BethJones.net Podcast: https://podcasters.spotify.com/pod/show/bethmjones YouTube Channel (videos & vlogs): https://www.youtube.com/@bethmjones Etsy Shop: https://www.etsy.com/shop/Shineyourlightindark   "Bravery isn't loud—sometimes it's just choosing yourself." Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura welcomes Julie Danielson—Life Coach, author, host of the "Get Over Divorce" podcast, and creator of the "Get Over Divorce Collective," a coaching program that helps women heal powerfully and create a life they love after divorce. Julie discusses healing after divorce, especially from narcissistic relationships, sharing her personal journey and the challenges of co-parenting with a toxic ex. She offers practical strategies like setting boundaries and using the Gray Rock Method. Together, they emphasize the importance of self-care, supportive communities, and rediscovering joy after trauma. Listeners are encouraged to reclaim their self-worth, embrace new experiences, and connect with resources for ongoing support and empowerment.   Key Topics & Timestamps Julie's Divorce Story (00:02:18) Julie shares her background, early marriage, and the personal journey leading to her divorce. Personal Growth After Divorce (00:06:33) Julie discusses her self-improvement, career growth, and the decision to end her marriage. Co-Parenting and Divorce Logistics (00:07:57) Julie explains the divorce process, co-parenting arrangements, and how clear agreements helped. Empowered Dating and Self-Worth (00:11:32) Laura and Julie reflect on dating with self-worth, authenticity, and not shape-shifting for others. How Julie Became a Divorce Coach (00:13:25) Julie describes her journey into coaching, the importance of authentic connections, and building her program. Julie's Second Marriage and Continued Growth (00:15:44) Julie shares meeting her current husband, the growth within a healthy relationship, and career transitions. Building a Coaching Business (00:17:39) Julie talks about starting her coaching business, focusing on helping women through divorce. Narcissistic Abuse vs. "Regular" Divorce (00:18:51) Discussion on the differences between divorcing a narcissist and a typical divorce, and the prevalence of narcissistic abuse. Losing Friends and Outgrowing Social Circles (00:26:31) They discuss how healing and setting boundaries can lead to losing friends who thrived on drama. Neuroplasticity and Healing the Brain (00:35:25) Discussion on how trying new things helps heal the brain after abuse and builds new neural pathways. Advice for Women Newly Divorced (00:37:11) Julie shares the "gray rock" method for dealing with toxic or narcissistic exes and minimizing emotional responses. Turning the Tables on the Narcissist (00:40:09) How gray rocking annoys narcissists and helps reclaim personal power. Handling Provocations and Staying Factual (00:41:42) Advice on not justifying or explaining yourself, sticking to facts, and not reacting to provocations. Powerful Quotes from the Episode Julie, 'As you grow and change, you are reaching new levels.' Julie, 'You don't need that drama in your life. Drama is life-sucking, and drama is what the narcissist surrounds himself with.' Julie, 'Your brain just expanded and you created a new neurotransmitter that says, "Oh, I can do this."' Laura, 'I'm good. And I do not ever have to acknowledge it because I've done too much work. I'm worth more than that. And so I will gray rock my life away.' RESOURCES: COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura SELF WORTH RESET MINI COURSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse YOU'RE NOT CRAZY ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE JOIN THE HEALING GROUP: https://www.patreon.com/c/thatswhereimatpodcast CONNECT WITH JULIE: Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/juliedanielson.CHAT Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/juliedanielson_coaching/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@getoverdivorcecoach Book a free Divorce Breakthrough Session with me, I will help you uncover some blocks and blind spots so you can breakthrough to your next level of healing faster. https://www.getoverdivorce.com/schedule Laura on Julie's podcast https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/144-husbands-behind-a-mask/id1511048997?i=1000659284917 The Gray Rock Method https://psychcentral.com/health/grey-rock-method   "Boundaries aren't walls—they're bridges back to yourself."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura talks with Rhonda, a financial coach and advocate for women navigating divorce. Once someone who avoided conflict, Rhonda transformed her communication skills through therapy and education, turning her personal challenges into a mission to help other women find their voice and financial confidence. With over 17,000 hours of experience, 565 clients served, and $20 million secured for women, Rhonda brings both expertise and empathy to her work. A former financial advisor, she recognized that women facing divorce need more than advice—they need strategic and emotional support to rebuild their lives. Laura and Rhonda explore the realities of financial abuse, lack of access to information, and the emotional toll of divorce. Rhonda also shares her CIA framework—Communication, Integrity, and Advocacy—to help women make informed decisions and achieve lasting financial independence. Key Topics & Timestamps Transition to Financial Industry (00:05:20) Rhonda discusses entering the financial industry and encountering both support and dysfunction. Founding Women's Financial Wellness Center (00:06:40) Rhonda explains why she started her business and her holistic approach to financial coaching. Challenging Gender Stereotypes in Finance (00:11:29) Laura and Rhonda discuss outdated views about women and money, and the importance of empowerment. Strategies for Uncovering Hidden Assets (00:15:11) Rhonda shares investigative strategies for finding hidden assets and the importance of asking the right questions. Manipulation in Divorce Settlements (00:20:50) Laura and Rhonda discuss manipulation, gaslighting, and the importance of advocating for fair settlements. Real-Life Impact of Divorce on Lifestyle (00:24:19) Rhonda explains the 41% decrease in lifestyle post-divorce and how to plan for financial changes. Encouraging Proactive Financial Conversations (00:30:29) Advice for women to start asking questions, taking inventory, and reviewing financial documents. Respect and Integrity in Financial Services (00:36:33) Laura and Rhonda discuss the need for respect, integrity, and clear communication from financial professionals. Powerful Quotes from the Episode Rhonda, 'If I can help one woman improve her relationship with money, I've empowered her for a lifetime.' Rhonda, 'We just have to crunch the numbers and see where stuff lands and give women a voice to be able to advocate for what they need.' Rhonda, 'Don't just sign. That's probably my biggest advice. Don't just sign.' Rhonda, 'You don't have to know everything. You just have to be willing to ask questions unapologetically.' Rhonda, 'You create that safety, you create that trust, you know that somebody has your best interests at heart.' RESOURCES: COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura SELF WORTH RESET MINI COURSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse YOU'RE NOT CRAZY ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com Connect with Rhonda WEBSITE: https://wfwcdivorce.com/ Get immediate access to my FREE mini course. https://api.leadconnectorhq.com/widget/form/S4a9NYjourlEQa70zVme "Financial freedom begins the moment you find your voice."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this empowering episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura sits down with Heidi Bee, the Divorce Comeback Coach, to explore the emotional journey of rebuilding life after divorce. Heidi Bee is a certified and trauma-informed divorce coach and somatic breathwork facilitator. Through her 3-month Comeback Course & Coaching Community, she helps women navigate their "new normal" by providing the roadmap, resources, and relationships needed to move forward with confidence. She's also the host of the Divorce Comeback Coach podcast, where she shares truth-telling conversations and practical guidance to help women take their next best step toward the life they deserve and desire. In this heartfelt conversation, Laura and Heidi open up about: The feelings of isolation, grief, and identity loss that often follow divorce — especially after long-term or toxic relationships. The importance of self-care, setting healthy boundaries, and rebuilding community during recovery. How embracing vulnerability and self-compassion can lead to powerful transformation and growth. Together, they remind listeners that while the road to healing may be difficult, it is also filled with opportunities for renewal, empowerment, and rediscovery of one's true self.   Key Topics & Timestamps Heidi's Divorce Story and the "Divorce Ditch" (00:03:06) Heidi shares her personal experience of feeling lost and stuck after divorce, describing it as the "divorce ditch." Coping Mechanisms and Avoidance (00:06:41) Heidi describes unhealthy coping mechanisms she used to avoid pain, such as overworking and numbing behaviors. Shame, Stigma, and the Need for Conversation (00:08:28) Exploring the shame and societal stigma around divorce, and the importance of open conversations. Coaching, Dreaming, and Finding Your Voice (00:17:28) Laura and Heidi discuss the role of coaching in helping women dream again and reclaim their voices. Relationship with Uncertainty and Healing (00:25:45) Learning to manage uncertainty, calm the nervous system, and develop new tools for emotional regulation. Attracting Healthy Relationships Through Self-Love (00:31:37) Heidi shares how self-love and authenticity attract healthier relationships, both romantic and platonic. Protecting Emotional Energy and Reclaiming Space (00:40:48) Heidi emphasizes protecting your emotional landscape and reclaiming energy from unhealthy attachments. Making a "Shit List" and Tracking Emotional Impact (00:44:52) Using a list to remember the negative impacts of an ex and tracking emotional responses to avoid repeating pain.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Heidi, 'I didn't want to admit I was depressed, but I was grieving and resisting it.' Heidi, 'I woke up one day thinking, I don't even know who I am anymore.' Laura, 'You deserve to trust your gut again. Spoiler alert: you were never the problem.' Laura, 'I started my podcast and realized no one ever let me talk.' Heidi, 'Recovery is self-discovery, and I forgot to continue to decide who I was going to be.' Heidi, 'It's more about trusting yourself, trusting that no matter what happens, you can handle it.' Heidi, 'I want people to know you don't have to be afraid of not knowing who you are. All that is, is uncertainty.' Heidi, 'The more I let go of things that no longer serve me, the more I have space to receive what is.' RESOURCES: COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura SELF WORTH RESET MINI COURSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse YOU'RE NOT CRAZY ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com Connect with Heidi WEBSITE:  https://divorcecomebackcoach.com/    INSTAGRAM: @DivorceComebackCoach TIK TOK: @DivorceComebackCoach Freebies & More: https://linktr.ee/DivorceComebackCoach Divorce Comeback Coach Podcast - Spotify / Apple "The more you let go of what's gone, the more space you create for what's meant for you."   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura sits down with Kate, a nurse of more than 20 years and a personal development coach, to talk about sobriety, self-worth, and healing after narcissistic relationships. Together, they explore how alcohol, food, and limiting beliefs can leave women vulnerable to toxic dynamics—and how breaking free requires courage, boundaries, and a new story. Kate shares her personal journey of getting sober, healing from toxic relationships, and reclaiming her power through coaching and self-discovery. With a focus on mental health and sobriety in her nursing career, Kate now runs a private practice helping women move past numbing behaviors and self-defeating patterns so they can step into their divine purpose. This heartfelt conversation offers practical strategies, hope, and encouragement for women ready to rewrite their narratives, reclaim their worth, and create healthier, more authentic lives. Key Topics & Timestamps Alcohol, Vulnerability, and Narcissistic Relationships (00:03:14) Kate explains how heavy drinking made her vulnerable to narcissistic partners and losing her sense of self. Drinking's Impact on Women (00:06:33) Discussion on how alcohol affects women differently and the societal normalization of drinking. Boundaries and Coaching Women (00:14:42) The importance of boundaries, self-sabotage, and how Kate coaches women to recognize and address these issues. Gaslighting and Reclaiming Sanity (00:19:44) Laura and Kate discuss gaslighting in narcissistic relationships and the importance of trusting your gut. Losing and Gaining Friends in Sobriety (00:28:48) Kate and Laura talk about losing old friends and gaining more authentic connections after getting sober. Love Bombing, Alcohol, and the Nervous System (00:37:19) How love bombing and alcohol both create emotional highs and lows, destabilizing women in toxic relationships. Coaching vs. Therapy: The House Painting Analogy (00:41:51) Kate explains the difference between coaching and therapy, using the analogy of missing a spot while painting. Kate's Coaching Practice (00:49:33) Kate describes her coaching services, approach, and how women can work with her for personal development and sobriety. Powerful Quotes from the Episode "Nobody plans on being an alcoholic; it's a very insidious drug that creeps up on us." - Kate "Give yourself permission to question your relationships when you get sober." - Kate "Alcohol only fuels your anxiety, and your superpower is getting really clear." - Kate "Go where you are celebrated, not tolerated." - Kate "A lot of healing has to do with just discovering our own power through sobriety." - Kate RESOURCES: COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura SELF WORTH RESET MINI COURSE: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/minicourse YOU'RE NOT CRAZY ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com Connect with Kate https://kate-vitela.mykajabi.com/rewired-sober-coaching-program https://www.facebook.com/profile.php?id=61577139306055 https://www.instagram.com/rewiredsober/ https://www.tiktok.com/@rewired.sober https://www.youtube.com/@rewiredsober https://www.linkedin.com/in/kate-vitela-carn-nc-bc-a9240721/ Sobriety is where self-worth begins, and healing truly takes root. Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this episode of That's Where I'm At, Laura and guest Allison K. Dagney share their experiences of healing after covert narcissistic relationships. They explore the challenges of recognizing emotional abuse, navigating divorce, and rebuilding self-worth through therapy, journaling, and supportive communities. Together, they offer hope and practical tools for women on their own healing journeys. Allison is a best-selling memoirist and emotional abuse recovery coach who helps women rise above toxic cycles and reclaim their strength. After nearly 20 years in a covertly abusive marriage, she transformed her trauma into triumph, later sharing her journey in her books When Tears Leave Scars and Radiate and Rise.   Key Topics & Timestamps Laura's Divorce & Realization (00:04:08) Laura recounts her divorce, discovering her ex's infidelity, and the clarity that followed about narcissistic abuse. Leaving a Narcissist: Planning & Survival (00:12:29) They discuss the importance of secret planning, survival mode, and the challenges of leaving an abusive relationship. Financial Abuse & Legal Strategies (00:20:56) Alison explains legal strategies like "status quo" to maintain financial stability during divorce. Finding Peace & Adjusting to Freedom (00:28:06) They discuss the unfamiliar feeling of peace and freedom after leaving an abusive relationship. Writing & Healing: Books and Podcasts (00:33:10) Laura describes her book's structure, the non-linear nature of healing, and the importance of sharing personal stories. Identity Loss & Rediscovery (00:40:23) They explore how abusive relationships cause loss of identity and the process of rediscovering personal interests. Quality Over Quantity in Relationships (00:58:11) They reflect on the value of having a smaller, higher-quality support network after leaving abuse.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode "I didn't know the depths of hell that a narcissist can do to you." - Alison "I had to choose me. I'd never chosen me, so I had to choose me.' - Laura "I cried because I was good at something I was never allowed to try, and someone was saying something nice to me." - Laura "I totally did not know what self-love was or how to love myself." - Alison "You have to take the first step, even if you don't see the whole staircase." - Laura "The key to me is boundaries, but you're not going to get there without self-love." - Laura "I am changing in a very good way, but that causes people to walk themselves right out of my life. I don't need those kinds of people anymore." - Alison "People are out there. Your tribe is out there. Unfortunately, you have to let go of the rest to find them." - Laura   RESOURCES: COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura YOU'RE NOT CRAZY, RECLAIMING YOUR SANITY AND SELF-WORTH AFTER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/   Connect with Allison WEBSITE: www.radiatenrise.com BOOKS: www.allisonkdagney.com   Your past may shape you, but it does not define your future.   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura welcomes Dr. Tina, a holistic brain health practitioner and survivor-turned-guide specializing in recovery from narcissistic abuse. Dr. Tina received her Ph.D. in Neuroscience from the University of Rochester and completed postdoctoral fellowships in psychiatric and nutritional epidemiology at Johns Hopkins and Tufts University. Drawing on both neuroscience and medical intuition, she helps sensitive souls address root causes beyond relationships, surroundings, or symptoms. Together, Laura and Dr. Tina discuss the challenges of toxic relationships, the importance of boundaries, and the path toward self-love. Dr. Tina shares her personal journey of once feeling like a magnet for toxic people, the strategies she developed to reclaim her power, and how those discoveries shaped her 7-Step UPLIFTS Program—a powerful framework to help clients heal from narcissistic abuse and learn to love again. Throughout the conversation, she offers practical tools such as somatic practices, mindfulness, and energy protection techniques, while Laura reflects on her own healing journey and advocates for women to share their stories. Known as a dynamic speaker who inspires hope in those navigating chronic health challenges and toxic relationships, Dr. Tina brings wisdom, compassion, and encouragement to anyone ready to reclaim their voice and their power. Key Topics & Timestamps Dr. Tina's Personal Journey & Becoming a Practitioner (00:02:33) Dr. Tina shares her experiences with toxic people and how it led her to specialize in this field. Understanding Boundaries and People-Pleasing (00:03:52) Discussion about the importance of boundaries, people-pleasing, and how these patterns attract toxic individuals. Fight, Flight, Freeze, and Trauma Release (00:07:14) The role of trauma responses and subconscious work in healing from abuse. Gray Rock Method & Emotional Detachment (00:10:16) Explanation of the gray rock method and its effectiveness in dealing with narcissists. Self-Love and Healing Journey (00:13:35) The importance of self-love, inner work, and the ripple effects of personal healing. Who Should Seek Dr. Tina's Help (00:39:28) Description of ideal clients and readiness for healing or relationship change. Powerful Quotes from the Episode "Never too late. Why not live the life you want, right?" "People with a lot of trauma can have very, very thick heart walls. I had a lot." "I grew up with narcissists and then I had a narcissist that destroyed my career." "I like that idea of celebrating your personal best because I think that's so important. It really makes me happy to think about where I was and now where I am." "I like to tell people, don't try hard. Try easy. Releasing subconscious barriers is the easiest and fastest way to get to where you want to go."   RESOURCES: COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura YOU'RE NOT CRAZY, RECLAIMING YOUR SANITY AND SELF-WORTH AFTER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/   Connect with Tina https://tryholisticbrainhealth.com https://www.facebook.com/tryHolisticBrainHealth https://www.facebook.com/tina.huang.353 https://www.linkedin.com/in/tinalhuangphd www.youtube.com/@TinaHuangPhD 5 Powerful Strategies to Quickly Get Grounded: https://tryholisticbrainhealth.com/grounded-and-safe/ Listeners might find this useful: https://tryholisticbrainhealth.com/how-to-deal-with-bullies-trolls-and-haters/   Boundaries aren't walls—they're bridges back to yourself.   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura and her guest, Gabi Garland—her podcast producer and close friend—discuss Laura's healing journey after divorcing a narcissistic ex-husband. They explore the challenges of setting boundaries, overcoming shame, and breaking generational cycles of trauma. Laura shares how creating the podcast has empowered her and built a supportive community for survivors. The conversation highlights the importance of vulnerability, self-love, and storytelling in healing, offering hope and practical advice to listeners navigating their own paths to recovery and self-discovery. Key Topics & Timestamps Celebrating Two Years & Laura's Transformation (00:01:56) Producer reflects on Laura's growth from fearful to empowered over the past three years. The Impact of Abuse on Self-Belief (00:09:53) How abuse rewires beliefs and the importance of doing deep inner work. Support Systems & Newfound Family (00:11:58) The importance of supportive friends and chosen family during healing. Celebrating Successes & Achievements (00:17:05) Laura's milestones: media appearances, bestselling books, and learning to celebrate herself. Podcast Growth & External Recognition (00:22:58) Reaching top podcast rankings, media invitations, and the impact of authenticity. Accountability & Choosing to Heal (00:53:07) Encouragement to seek therapy, question inherited identities, and choose change. Generational Healing & Family Reconciliation (01:04:46) Changing generational patterns, healing with her children, and doing it for future generations. The Power of Telling Your Story (01:16:26) Encouragement to share your story, as it may be the key to someone else's healing. The Worth of the Healing Journey (01:19:00) Reflecting on the value of the healing process and excitement for the future. Powerful Quotes from the Episode "If it feels hard, that doesn't mean it's wrong. The wrong people are leaving, and there's room for the right ones." "Gaslighting isn't just a buzzword—it's the sick, spiraling feeling when they say, 'You're too sensitive.'" "You're never going to get to boundaries if you don't love yourself." "The only person we're protecting when we stay silent is the abuser." "There's a woman who was me three years ago—if I don't tell my story, she's going to die." "It's never too late. Please hear this—you can change." RESOURCES: COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura YOU'RE NOT CRAZY, RECLAIMING YOUR SANITY AND SELF-WORTH AFTER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/ Connect with Gabi Garland WEBSITE: https://www.resilientvoicemedia.com/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/gabi.garland FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/gabrielle.anaya.5?mibextid=LQQJ4d TIK TOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@gabi.garland?_t=8qZEJ4HMlmY&_r=1 The moment I broke my silence, I found my strength.   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura interviews Michal Spiegelman, a certified professional life coach, Reiki master, spiritual mentor, medical intuitive, and social worker, about healing from abuse and trauma, especially for women. Michal shares her journey from social work to holistic healing after her own trauma, emphasizing that true recovery involves body, soul, and spiritual work—not just talk therapy. The conversation explores practical tools like soul journaling and guided visualization, the importance of self-worth, and setting boundaries. Listeners are encouraged to seek holistic healing approaches and connect deeply with their inner selves for lasting transformation. Michal is the author of 'Becoming Soulful: Six Keys for Profound Transformation in Your Therapy, Coaching, or Healing Practice,' and is passionate about elevating consciousness in the world, one soul at a time. She empowers women and healing professionals alike to become soulful and shine in their personal and professional lives.   Key Topics & Timestamps The Limits of Talk Therapy (00:03:17)Michal discusses the limitations of traditional therapy and the importance of integrating body and soul work. The Role of the Soul in Healing (00:05:05)Michal explains the importance of connecting with one's soul for deep, sustainable healing and guidance. Soul Journaling and Practical Practices (00:11:50)Michal describes practical exercises for connecting with the soul, such as soul journaling and intentional rituals. Patterns from Past Trauma (00:14:10)Laura and Michal discuss how childhood patterns and beliefs influence current relationships and healing. Kindness vs. Tolerating Abuse (00:14:34)Michal highlights the common confusion between being kind and tolerating abuse, especially among spiritual women. Self-Love and Breaking Patterns (00:18:50)Laura and Michal discuss the necessity of self-love and worthiness to break cycles of abuse and attract healthier relationships. Not All Healing Means Divorce (00:21:50)Michal notes that not all clients end up divorcing; some transform their relationships through inner work. Powerful Quotes from the Episode Laura, 00:18:50, 'The biggest thing for me was learning how to love myself and that I had value.' Michal, 00:19:01, 'Until you feel that you're worthy and until you really learn to love yourself, that's why many women attract relationship after relationship with abuse.' Laura, 00:20:58, 'I have value, I have worth, and he was unwilling to participate in our life.' Michal, 00:22:01, 'If we get a divorce and we don't do the inner work, then we just bring the same patterns into the next relationship.' Michal, 00:22:51, 'To know and to remember that the trauma is stored in the body.' RESOURCES: COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura YOU'RE NOT CRAZY, RECLAIMING YOUR SANITY AND SELF-WORTH AFTER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/ CONNECT WITH MICHAL: WEBSITE: https://www.beaconsofchange.com/  GET HER BOOK: https://a.co/d/hjWAur2 Healing begins when you remember your worth.   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this episode of That's Where I'm At, host Laura sits down with Marla Bollak, an Interpersonal Relationship Coach and Certified Sacred Depths Coach trained in NLP, neuro-coaching, and trauma. Marla's mission is to empower professionals to clear blocks from within themselves and from toxic relationships in the workplace or family. Her holistic approach integrates the body, mind, emotions, and energetics. She specializes in working with highly functioning, successful professionals who have read all the books, attended all the seminars, tried all the things — with some success — yet the problem remains. Together, Laura and Marla explore: Healing from narcissistic abuse and how childhood trauma affects adult relationships How trauma responses like fawning develop and why nervous system regulation is essential The power of an empathetic witness in healing How healing shifts your energy, helping you break free from toxic cycles The role of vulnerability and compassion in long-term growth and recovery Whether you're on the path to healing or supporting someone who is, this episode offers practical tools, hope, and encouragement. Key Topics & Timestamps Marla's Background and Healing Journey (00:02:58) Marla shares her childhood experiences, her healing journey, and her motivation for coaching others. Why People Don't Intervene (00:08:28) Marla and Laura discuss conflict avoidance, enablers, and the challenges of getting support from others. Clients' Experiences and Trauma Responses (00:09:24) Marla describes common issues clients face, trauma responses like fawning, and the importance of nervous system regulation. The Role of the Empathetic Witness (00:12:31) Marla explains the importance of having an empathetic witness in healing and how memories can be changed. Growth Through Healing and No Longer Attracting Bullies (00:15:49) Marla and Laura talk about using adversity for growth and how healing changes their reactions to toxic people. Energetics and No Longer Attracting Abuse (00:17:06) Marla explains how energetic shifts mean toxic people no longer affect or are attracted to you. Triggers, Healing with Family, and Vulnerability (00:17:59) Laura shares about being triggered, healing with her children, and the importance of vulnerability in family healing. Excuses vs. Reasons for Trauma Responses (00:19:09) Marla reframes "excuses" as reasons for trauma responses, encouraging self-compassion. Powerful Quotes from the Episode Laura, 00:00:34, 'Keeping secrets will make you sick, and they always come to light in the end.' Marla, 00:04:07, 'Don't give up on yourself.' Laura, 00:07:17, 'I spent 33 years with someone who made me feel like I was the problem every time, no matter what.' Laura, 00:07:17, 'You deserve to trust your gut again. You deserve to trust you.' Marla, 00:06:20, 'People would see me being abused in full daylight and nobody stood up for me. They acted like it was normal.' Laura, 00:12:13, 'What I found was that I wasn't being loved the way I needed to be loved.' Laura, 00:19:02, 'We've had a lot of good healing and it's taken a lot of vulnerability to get there.' RESOURCES: YOU'RE NOT CRAZY, RECLAIMING YOUR SANITY AND SELF-WORTH AFTER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura Connect with Marla Bollak Website:  https://marlabollak.com/ Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/marla/ Healing takes vulnerability — but it leads to deeper connection. Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura and guest Dr. Jill Rosenthal, an award-winning Harvard and Stanford educated physician who retired after a 35+ year career and became certified as a wellness and mindset coach, share their personal journeys through trauma, loss, and healing. Dr. Rosenthal's extensive experience and training, coupled with her own transformation from a stressed, overworked, unhealthy physician, wife, and mother into a happy, healthy, thriving coach, make her uniquely equipped to help others release unconscious thoughts, emotions, and behaviors that hold them back, so they can create their dream life. Together, Laura and Dr. Rosenthal discuss the impact of emotional and psychological abuse, the challenges of rebuilding self-worth, and the importance of processing difficult emotions. Through candid conversation, they highlight the power of storytelling, community, and self-compassion in overcoming adversity and reclaiming one's life after trauma.   Introduction & Coping Mechanisms (00:00:00) Discussion on comfort habits, dopamine hits, and how people push away uncomfortable feelings. Podcast Introduction & Guest Bio (00:00:40) Laura introduces the podcast, shares her mission, and presents Dr. Jill Rosenthal's background and transformation. Dr. Jill's Personal Journey (00:02:16) Dr. Jill summarizes her life challenges, including loss, illness, and her shift from medicine to coaching. Impact of Trauma & Feeling Stuck (00:03:30) Exploring how trauma, stress, and feeling stuck affect decision-making and self-worth. Coping with Trauma & Childhood Programming (00:05:41) Discussion on trauma responses, childhood experiences, and how they shape adult coping mechanisms. Effects of Emotional Abuse & Decision Paralysis (00:06:45) Laura and Dr. Jill discuss the impact of long-term emotional abuse on the ability to make decisions. Gaslighting & Narcissistic Abuse (00:09:09) Laura explains gaslighting, shares her experience, and introduces her book on healing from narcissistic abuse. Overcoming Conditioning & Taking Action (00:10:22) Dr. Jill describes the process of relearning decision-making and removing internal barriers to action. Overwhelm & Temporary Distractions (00:11:37) Conversation about overwhelm, avoidance behaviors, and why people turn to distractions for comfort. Pushing Away Feelings & the Bop Clown Analogy (00:12:20) Dr. Jill uses the bop clown metaphor to explain how suppressed feelings resurface and the importance of feeling them. Healing After Abuse & Setting Boundaries (00:14:23) Discussion on the necessity of healing emotional wounds, developing self-worth, and setting healthy boundaries. Patterns in Second Relationships (00:17:25) Exploring why unresolved trauma can affect new relationships and the importance of inner work before moving on. Feeling Safe After Abuse (00:18:54) The difference between rational understanding and truly feeling safe in new relationships. Conclusion & Resources (00:19:27) Closing remarks, Dr. Jill's website and free gift, encouragement to connect, and final thoughts on healing and community.   Powerful Quotes from the Episode Laura, 00:00:40, "I believe keeping secrets will make you sick, and that they always come to light in the end. As women, we're often told to be quiet, don't share your story, don't talk about the things we go through. It's making women sick, sad, and suicidal. We don't have to be on the other side to share our story." Dr. Jill Rosenthal, 00:02:29, "I went through a two and a half year period where I lost both my parents, managed their care from two to three thousand miles away, had foot reconstruction, my husband went into assisted living and now memory care for Alzheimer's disease, and I had breast cancer—surgery, radiation, chemotherapy. There was so much that would make your average person just run screaming from the room. But Jill 2.0 is thriving and happy despite all of the stuff that's going on. There's still stuff going on—my husband is in memory care and doesn't know who I am the last couple of weeks. I'm getting called every other day because he's hitting, kicking, and punching the staff. So I have things to deal with, but it doesn't have to take me down." Dr. Jill Rosenthal, 00:03:30, "My treatment for my cancer eventually led to a disability retirement from my 35-year medical practice. It was sad, because I loved my patients, I adored my team, I loved what I did, and it was probably killing me with stress. We're so used to taking that—the stress accumulates. We're like the frog in boiling water. Although I was not in a marriage of abuse, my first husband wasn't great to me emotionally, but not like what a lot of people are dealing with. I get what happens when you feel like you have no choices, when you feel stuck in a situation and you can't get out, and when it impacts and changes your thoughts and feelings. You just sort of go, 'Oh, woe is me.' I get that." Laura, 00:05:41, "I remember towards the end, when you're in psychological and emotional abuse, your brain—I just remember my brain was mush. It had been 33 years. My brain was mush. I couldn't make any choices because, exactly, every choice was wrong. So I did feel stuck in a lot of ways, even just making simple decisions. I remember even after leaving my marriage, talking to my therapist and her saying, 'Just say yes to some good things and see if you like them.' Because I'm like, 'I don't know.' I call myself Laura 2.0. I think it's great, but it's so true. We're not dead, so we're not done. There's still time to do what you want to do. But I just remember going, 'I don't know what's next.'" Laura, 00:09:09, "I spent 33 years with someone who made me feel like I was the problem for everything that was wrong in our lives." Laura, 00:12:14, "I need sunshine. I am a houseplant. I need oxygen and sunshine and some water." Dr. Jill Rosenthal, 00:15:49, "Unless you heal this, you're still carrying it around. It's on your shoulders, it's in big, heavy suitcases—the old ones, not the ones with the spinner wheels that you just kind of roll. Unless you heal it, it's still there, and it's still talking to you, and you're still feeling it. So you take it everywhere you go." Dr. Jill Rosenthal, 00:16:44, "If you've been in a relationship where somebody has really beaten you down like that, you have to heal the damage that's been done to your psyche, and you have to heal that feeling of self-worth. You have to learn to get better boundaries, but you have to be able to do it in a way that is constructive." Laura, 00:20:53, "I have a heart for helping women because I felt so alone after my divorce, and I don't want anybody to feel that way." Laura, 00:21:02, "This is why we do these things, right? We didn't want anybody else to feel the way that we did."   RESOURCES: YOU'RE NOT CRAZY, RECLAIMING YOUR SANITY AND SELF-WORTH AFTER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura FOLLOW DR JILL: WEBSITE:    https://drjillrosenthal.com  INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/drjillx/ FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/jill.rosenthal.75 GIFT FOR YOU: https://drjillgift.com/recovery Put Down The Baggage: A Self-Healing Journal & Quick-Start Guide to Letting Go of What's Holding You Back After Trauma   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com   Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

What are Two Things you could do to improve your relationships? Perhaps you've heard the way you do one thing is the way you do everything. You see, your mind doesn't know the difference between past, present, and future. Changing how you think and feel about emotionally stressful times in your life can shift everything! Dawn works to help people find and maintain their ideal relationships. Dawn has Board Designations for Hypnosis & NLP Training & Coaching. She also is an Accredited Certified EFT Practitioner and EFT Relationship and Intimacy Coach.  In this episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura and guest Dawn, a relationship and intimacy coach, discuss healing from past relationship trauma. They explore the impact of past experiences on self-worth, the importance of sharing stories, and practical healing methods like EFT and hypnosis. Dawn shares insights on recognizing unconscious beliefs and setting healthy boundaries, while Laura reflects on her own healing journey. Together, they encourage listeners to prioritize self-care, seek supportive connections, and embrace personal growth on the path to healthier, more fulfilling relationships. Transition from Massage Therapy to Emotional Healing (00:02:25) Dawn describes her journey from massage therapy to emotional release and mind-body healing techniques. The Body's Response to Stress and Trauma (00:03:15) Discussion on how the brain and body hold onto stress and trauma, affecting physical and emotional health. Unconscious Mind and Relationship Patterns (00:04:26) Dawn explains the unconscious mind's role in shaping relationship behaviors and reactions. Clearing Emotional Blocks and Beliefs (00:05:27) Dawn details how she uses tapping, hypnosis, and other techniques to clear limiting beliefs and emotional blocks. Adjusting to Healthy Relationships After Toxic Ones (00:06:17) Conversation about how healthy relationships can feel "boring" after chaos, and how to identify and accept positive traits. Self-Worth, Value, and Gaslighting (00:08:49) Laura discusses the impact of gaslighting and the importance of reclaiming self-worth after narcissistic abuse. Personal Story of Lost Self-Worth (00:10:08) Dawn shares her experience of losing self-worth in an abusive relationship and the journey to regain her power. Unpacking Childhood Beliefs and Patterns (00:12:45) Dawn explains how early childhood experiences shape beliefs and how hypnotherapy can gently address these patterns. Setting Goals and Somatic Therapies (00:14:43) Dawn emphasizes individualized healing journeys, the value of somatic therapies, and creating permanent change. Overcoming Fear of Being Alone (00:16:38) Discussion on helping clients who fear being alone, and how to find safety and self-worth outside of relationships. Recognizing Red Flags and Elevated Self-Value (00:18:32) Laura and Dawn discuss how self-work makes it easier to spot red flags and walk away from unhealthy relationships. Letting Go for Healthier Relationships (00:19:01) Dawn explains the importance of releasing relationships that aren't right for both parties' growth. RESOURCES: YOU'RE NOT CRAZY, RECLAIMING YOUR SANITY AND SELF-WORTH AFTER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/ COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura FOLLOW GUEST: LINKS: https://linktr.ee/unifiedmind WEBSITE: https://UnifiedMind.info TIK TOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@relationshipmechanics INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/therelationshipmechanic/ FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/dawn.bennett.5055/ Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this powerful episode of "That's Where I'm At," host Laura sits down with J Lumen, a certified Life Transformation and Empowerment Coach who knows firsthand what it means to feel completely trapped in life. J's story takes a shocking turn when what started as feeling stuck in the wrong relationship and wrong job escalated to a terrifying night that ended with her ex-boyfriend's arrest for attempted murder—her attempted murder. This life-altering experience became the catalyst for J to stop tolerating her life and start truly living it. Through her "Unknown Bucket List Approach," J teaches others how to make "micro shifts" that lead to major life transformations. This conversation dives deep into overcoming the fear of judgment, recognizing the power of "mini moments," building what J calls a "force field of resilience," and learning to live without regret. J shares practical strategies for those feeling trapped by circumstances, guilt, or doubt, showing how to break free from the cycle of tolerance and step into a life worth celebrating. J Lumen is a certified Life Transformation and Empowerment Coach who understands intimately what it means to feel trapped in the wrong life. After years of being stuck in an unfulfilling relationship where she knew she'd say no if proposed to, and a job she hated but felt financially obligated to keep, J made the difficult decision to pay for her boyfriend to move over 1000 miles away to live with his family. Two months later, he returned unexpectedly, and the night ended with his arrest for attempted murder—her attempted murder. This traumatic wake-up call became the turning point that transformed J from someone who was merely surviving to someone truly thriving. She created "The Unknown Bucket List Approach," a methodology focused on making "micro shifts" and collecting "mini moments" to create meaningful life changes. J is passionate about helping others stop tolerating their lives and start living without regret, teaching that you don't have to wait for major life upheavals to begin creating the life you want. Her philosophy centers on the belief that "if you're not dead, you're not done" and that everyone deserves to live a life they don't regret. Key Topics Discussed: From Trapped to Taking Action: Feeling stuck in the wrong relationship and wrong job, and the difficult decision to change her circumstances The Attempted Murder Wake-Up Call: How surviving a life-threatening situation became the catalyst for complete life transformation The Unknown Bucket List Approach: J's methodology for identifying overlooked achievements and leveraging them for future growth Micro Shifts vs. Major Overhauls: Why small, intentional changes are more sustainable and effective than waiting for big life events Mini Moments That Matter: Learning to recognize and celebrate small achievements that build momentum for larger goals Overcoming Fear of Judgment: Strategies for dealing with criticism from family, friends, and colleagues when making life changes Building a Force Field of Resilience: Creating strong boundaries that protect your energy and maintain your progress The Tolerance Trap: How society teaches us to "suck it up" and why this mindset keeps us stuck in unfulfilling lives Living Without Regret: The philosophy of making decisions based on what you'll regret least, not what others expect Collecting Your Past Wins: How to look back at your life and recognize achievements you've been dismissing as insignificant The Balance of Time: Living like life is both short and long—urgent enough to take action, patient enough to build sustainably Redefining Success: Moving from external validation to internal satisfaction and authentic self-expression Supporting Others vs. Self-Care: How to maintain relationships while prioritizing your own growth and boundaries Powerful Quotes from the Episode "Life happens. And it's good or bad. It's unexpected, random, unplanned... And then we have to react. And that's what shift happens." "We don't have to wait for that shift to happen before we start living the life that we don't regret." "If you're not dead, you're not done." "It's just about living a life that you don't regret because it is yours. So you should live the one you want without fear or influence." "If you are wanting to do this and also this, then you decide which one you're going to regret the least. And you do that." "You can look back at your life and you can start seeing all the things that you've done and that you've experienced and you can basically uncover the bucket list of your life that you've been living." "Most people would not even give themselves enough credit... But those are the little mini moments that I'm talking about." "Once your way of thinking has been shifted, you'll never go back." "We're taught as adults that we have to suck it up and tolerate so many things... No, so who? That's a story." "Live like life is short and live like life is long. And it's about finding the balance in between." Resources Host Laura's Resources: YOU'RE NOT CRAZY, RECLAIMING YOUR SANITY AND SELF-WORTH AFTER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE ebook: GET IT HERE MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE COACH WITH LAURA: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/coachwithlaura PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/ J Lumen's Resources: Website: The Unknown Bucket List - stop waiting and start living Free Life Assessment: https://resumeyourlife.com/ LinkedIn: www.linkedin.com/in/jlumen8 Instagram: @theunknownbucketlist Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/theunknownbucketlist/ TikTok: @theunknownbucketlist Connect with the Show Follow the Podcast: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com Host: Laura, podcast host and author focused on healing from narcissistic abuse Mission: Sharing stories with women in the middle of the mess, showing up bravely as they heal Community: Creating space for women to learn, grow, and heal together through shared experiences Loved this episode? J's story proves that our worst moments can become the catalyst for our greatest transformations. Her journey from feeling trapped and tolerating life to creating a methodology that helps others thrive shows that "shift happens"—and we don't have to wait for tragedy to start living the life we deserve. Sometimes the most powerful changes begin with the smallest shifts, and every mini moment matters in building the life you won't regret. Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

Welcome back to That's Where I'm At! In the last two episodes, we talked about healing after narcissistic abuse, rebuilding trust in yourself, and setting boundaries. Today, we're going even deeper as we focus on reclaiming your identity, learning to dream again, and moving from surviving to truly thriving. If you've been feeling stuck, wondering who you are now, or questioning if you even deserve a joyful future, this episode is for you. Laura breaks down three essential healing truths:💥 You are not meant to go back to who you were before the abuse—you are meant to move forward and make the best parts of yourself even stronger.💥 It's never too late to dream again—your past doesn't define your future, and your dreams are still possible.💥 Thriving doesn't mean being happy all the time; it's about feeling free and having the ability to navigate life with resilience and self-trust. What You'll Learn:✨ How to reconnect with the person you are today and start rebuilding your identity✨ Why it's never too late to dream, and how to start dreaming again✨ The difference between surviving and thriving, and how to take the next step toward a life that excites you Resources & Support:💫 Ready to take your healing journey deeper? Join Laura's Midlife Reset Masterclass—a 10-week program focused on rebuilding your self-worth, setting boundaries, rediscovering your dreams, and creating a fulfilling life.👉 Midlife Reset Masterclass 💜 Need support on your healing journey? Book your No More Sleepless Nights discovery call.👉 Free Discovery Call Let's Connect:📸 Instagram: @thatswhereimatpodcast🌐 Website: ThatsWhereImAtPodcast.com 📚 Read Laura's bestselling book: Married to a "Nice" Guy👉 Book Store If this episode resonated with you...Please rate, review, and share! Every listen helps another woman feel less alone on her journey. 💜 Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this inspiring episode of "That's Where I'm At" podcast, host Laura welcomes Lori Daneke, a communication and relationship coach who discovered her calling later in life. Lori shares her powerful journey from being a people-pleaser trapped in a silent, emotionally abusive marriage to becoming an empowered coach helping others find their authentic selves. What started as a quest to improve her golf game led to a complete life transformation at age 58. Through candid conversation, Lori explains how 90% of our thoughts aren't our own, stemming from our imprint years (ages 0-7), and how breakthrough work can help us release the emotional baggage we've been carrying. Her story demonstrates that it's truly never too late to make changes, use your voice, and ask for what you want. Lori Daneke is a communication and relationship coach with master certifications in NLP, TLT, Hypnotherapy, Reiki Level 3, and Huna, as well as Advanced Trauma and Addiction training. With over 300 hours of training and having coached over 100 clients, she specializes in supporting women in creating the life they desire and deserve while embracing their authentic selves. Lori's journey into coaching began unexpectedly at age 58 when seeking to improve her golf game led to discovering that golf and life are direct reflections of each other. She is a proud grandmother of three (with another grandchild on the way) and finds her happy places playing with her grandchildren and going to the beach. Key Topics Discussed: The Connection Between Golf and Life: How Lori's quest to improve her golf game revealed deeper life patterns The Four Voices in Our Head: Understanding the inner child, inner critic, inner ego, and intuition People-Pleasing Patterns: The dangers of living according to others' expectations rather than your authentic self Silent Abuse: Recognizing emotional abuse through withholding communication and attention The 90% Rule: How most of our thoughts come from our imprint years (ages 0-7) rather than our true selves Breakthrough Process: Lori's 10-step method for uncovering root causes and aligning conscious and unconscious minds Releasing Emotional Baggage: Using the analogy of travel luggage to understand letting go of past trauma Finding Your Purpose: How it's never too late to discover your authentic calling and voice Powerful Quotes from the Episode "It'd be grateful for what you have experienced, take the learnings from it, so you can have even more gratitude and love yourself. Because truly, it's never too late to make choices and use your voice and ask for what you want." "In my marriage, I couldn't do that. I wasn't allowed. It was very transactional. And when I asked for what I needed or what I wanted, I got crickets. So that was the abuse that I tolerated. And I tolerated it is silence." "I discovered that not only that golf and life are direct reflections of each other. So what was going on in my golf game was going on in my life. I was angry, frustrated, felt like I was isolated and alone." "90% of our thoughts are not our own. They come from our imprint years or zero to seven... we learned what we learned from the people from the people that are closest to us." "I was the definition of a people pleaser. I did everything that everybody thought I was supposed to do and everybody told me what I was supposed to do." "You can't help other people unless you help yourself first... because you haven't released the blocks around what is actually holding you back from getting what you want." "Everything that happens to us, good, bad, or ugly, is there to teach us a lesson. And the lessons we learn is something positive and it's going forward." "It's never too late to discover that voice and that authentic you, your true purpose in life and what you were put on this planet to do." RESOURCES: MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/ FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com BOOKS & JOURNALS: https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards RESOURCES FOR YOUR HEALING: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/resources FOLLOW LORI: EMAIL: hockeymomld18@rogers.com FACEBOOK: https://www.facebook.com/lori.danecke Loved this episode? Connect with Lori through her Facebook pages or email to learn more about her breakthrough coaching process. Don't forget to leave a review on Apple Podcasts and Spotify to help others find these stories of hope and healing!   Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In today's episode, Laura explores the important topics of self-worth, core values, and boundaries—three crucial elements of your healing journey after leaving a toxic relationship. If you're feeling stuck or questioning why you don't feel "better" yet, this episode is for you. Laura breaks down three essential healing truths:💥 Healing doesn't happen overnight—leaving the relationship is only the first step.💥 Rebuilding your self-worth is a process that takes time and practice.💥 Setting boundaries is an act of self-love, and it's essential for protecting your peace. Expect real talk, actionable advice, and a dose of empowerment to help you move forward. What You'll Learn:✨ How to begin rebuilding self-worth after emotional abuse✨ Why knowing your core values is key to making empowered choices✨ Why boundaries are essential—and how to start setting them Resources & Support:💫 Ready to go deeper into this work? Join Laura's Midlife Reset Masterclass—a 10-week journey to confidence, freedom, and joy.👉 Midlife Reset Masterclass 💜 Need someone to talk to? Book your free discovery call, No More Sleepless Nights, and let's explore your healing journey.👉 Free Discovery Call Let's Connect:📸 Instagram: @thatswhereimatpodcast🌐 Website: ThatsWhereImAtPodcast.com 📚 Read Laura's bestselling book: Married to a "Nice" Guy👉 Book Store If this episode resonated with you...Please rate, review, and share! Every listen helps another woman feel less alone on her journey. 💜 Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this powerful episode host Laura welcomes Claudia Braun, a holistic mindset and lifestyle coach certified in Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT). Claudia opens up about her personal journey with emotional eating that began at age 10 when she discovered food could temporarily ease emotional pain. She shares how this coping mechanism followed her through adolescence, college, and into adulthood, creating a vicious cycle of stress eating and dieting. The conversation explores how our relationship with food often masks deeper emotional needs and how the cultural messaging around dieting affects women. Claudia offers practical insights on breaking free from emotional eating patterns by addressing the root emotional causes, embracing authenticity, and learning to own both your "yes" and your "no" instead of living to please others. Claudia Braun is a longtime Chicago resident, certified in Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT), and works as a holistic mindset and lifestyle coach. With 30 years of yoga practice, she brings a wealth of experience to her approach to healing. Claudia has been a keynote speaker at several in-person women's events, hosted the Healing Summit, and been featured on the Holistic Monitor podcast. Drawing from her own journey of healing her relationship with food and emotional eating, Claudia now helps others break free from stress eating patterns and people-pleasing behaviors to live more authentically. She is also a dog mom to Jason, an avid gardener, and enjoys working with clay. Key Topics Discussed: Emotional Eating as a Coping Mechanism: How food becomes a "companion" to manage stress and difficult emotions The Vicious Cycle of Dieting: Why traditional dieting approaches often fail to address the emotional roots of eating habits People-Pleasing and Boundaries: The connection between people-pleasing, lack of boundaries, and using food for comfort Emotional Freedom Technique (EFT/Tapping): How this approach helps release trapped emotions in the subconscious mind Authentic Living: The importance of being true to yourself rather than living based on others' expectations Owning Your Yes and No: Practical strategies for honoring your own needs and setting boundaries Healing Through Vulnerability: The power of acknowledging and expressing difficult emotions rather than suppressing them Cultural Conditioning Around Food: How societal and family messages about food and dieting affect our relationship with eating Powerful Quotes from the Episode "One of the things that I'd like to share with y'all is that I have these three strategies to own your yes and own your no. And part of that is kind of getting in touch with what do we actually feel." "I didn't know my yes. I didn't know my no. I knew other people's yes and other people's no. I was a master people pleaser." "It brings me back to that story with my boyfriend's therapist... I was saying to him, 'I don't know how to make my parents happy and my boyfriend happy at the same time.' And he looks at me and I could see that there was something about that statement I made that was really off... I'm not even in the equation." "You can't put a happy face in an empty tank." "I give people permission to say what they don't want to say." "When I work with clients, I have them write a letter to food, like say goodbye to your best friend. It is your best friend. It's been your best friend." "The only way out is through." "Can you imagine what life would be like if you were authentically you instead of constantly living life based on everyone else's judgments and expectations of you?" RESOURCES: MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/ FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com BOOKS & JOURNALS: https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards RESOURCES FOR YOUR HEALING: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/resources FOLLOW CLAUDIA: WEBSITE: www.claudia-braun.com 3 strategies to Own Your YES & Your NO (without the guilt, that's held you back before) https://www.freebie.claudia-braun.com/ Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this deeply validating episode, Laura explores the questions so many women wrestle with: Was he really a narcissist? Can I trust myself again? Why am I not further along? If you've been stuck in cycles of self-doubt or healing shame, you're not alone—and this episode is here to bring clarity, comfort, and real guidance. Laura breaks down three essential healing truths: 💥 How to identify narcissistic behavior—without needing a diagnosis 💥 What rebuilding self-trust looks like after emotional abuse 💥 Why owning your current stage of healing is more than enough Expect myth-busting insights, gentle reminders, and hard-won wisdom that will help you take your next brave step forward. What You'll Learn: ✨ The truth about covert narcissism and manipulation ✨ How to strengthen your intuition and rebuild self-trust ✨ Why your healing doesn't have to look a certain way or meet a timeline ✨ How to embrace where you are—with zero shame Resources & Support: 💫 Ready for a fresh start? Join Laura's Midlife Reset Masterclass—a 10-week journey to confidence, freedom, and joy. 👉 https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/midlife-reset 💜 Need someone to talk to? Book your free discovery call (No More Sleepless Nights) and let's see what healing looks like for you. 👉 https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/free-gift-from-laura Let's Connect: 📸 Instagram: @thatswhereimatpodcast 🌐 Website: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/ 📚 Read Laura's bestselling book: Married to a "Nice" Guy – https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/book-store If this episode resonated with you... Please rate, review, and share! Every listen helps another woman feel less alone on her journey. 💜 Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.

In this powerful episode of That's Where I'm At, Laura welcomes Angie Marie, a lifestyle and health coach who spent 20 years in a narcissistic relationship. Together, they explore the insidious nature of covert and overt narcissism, the devastating impact of gaslighting, and the complex emotions that surface when leaving these relationships. Angie shares her journey of reclaiming her authentic self after years of people-pleasing and self-abandonment, discovering that true health encompasses both physical and emotional well-being. This raw conversation offers validation, hope, and practical insights for anyone recovering from narcissistic abuse.   Angie Marie is a lifestyle and health coach and upcoming podcaster launching "Reauthenticated." After spending 20 years in a narcissistic marriage and working 25 years as a hairdresser, Angie is on a mission to help people reconnect with their authentic selves. Her journey began with focusing solely on nutrition and physical fitness, but evolved to include emotional healing from trauma as she recognized that self-validation had been missing from her life. Through her platform "Reauthenticated," Angie guides others to build confidence not just through nutrition and physical activity, but through healing past traumas and embracing their spiritual journey.   Key Topics Discussed Different Types of Narcissism: The distinction between covert narcissists (who appear nice in public but are abusive in private) and overt narcissists (who are openly self-centered) Gaslighting and Its Effects: How narcissists use gaslighting to make victims question their reality and sanity The Friend Betrayal: Angie's experience with her friend who became involved with her husband during their separation Why Victims Stay: The psychological reasons people remain in abusive relationships, including survival mode and fear of life changes Healing Through Communication: Learning to express feelings and speak truth after years of silence The Peace After Leaving: Finding relief and healing after exiting the relationship Building a New Identity: Discovering who you are outside of the narcissist's definition Physical vs. Emotional Health: Balancing external appearance with internal emotional well-being Powerful Quotes "But we don't get the opportunity to talk about our feelings with the narcissist because it doesn't do any good. It's not going to be valid. They're going to disregard it." - Angie Marie "I finally learned how to love myself and not seek validation in other people. You know, I don't have to look perfect. I don't have to look pretty all the time... Now instead of everything being so perfect and so polished, I get to just be me." - Angie Marie Timestamps 00:00 - Introduction and welcome 04:15 - Discussion on covert vs. overt narcissism 08:30 - Angie's story of betrayal during separation 16:45 - The friend who pointed out narcissism 22:20 - The physical and emotional impact of narcissistic abuse 29:15 - Learning to speak your truth after years of silence 33:45 - The influence of childhood trauma on adult relationships 39:10 - Finding self-love and authentic expression 46:30 - Building a healthy new relationship after abuse 54:20 - Creating boundaries and healing 58:40 - Information about Angie's podcast and coaching Loved this episode? Leave a review on Apple Podcasts or Spotify to help more people find these stories of healing. Follow Laura on social media and let her know what resonated with you. Resources RESOURCES FROM LAURA: Join Laura on the Conscious Transformation Summit May 7th @ 1:00 pm PST: https://conscioussummitevents.com/register?am_id=laura MARRIED TO A "NICE" GUY: GETTING OVER NARCISSISTIC ABUSE: SHOP HERE PRIVATE FACEBOOK SUPPORT GROUP: https://www.facebook.com/groups/marriedtoaniceguy/ FOLLOW THE PODCAST: http://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com BOOKS & JOURNALS: https://www.amazon.com/author/laurarichards RESOURCES FOR YOUR HEALING: https://www.thatswhereimatpodcast.com/resources FOLLOW ANGIE: WEBSITE: https://www.reauthenticated.com/ INSTAGRAM: https://www.instagram.com/angiemarie_reauthenticated/ TIK TOK: https://www.tiktok.com/@angiemarie_2023 PINTEREST: https://www.pinterest.com/AngieMarie_Reauthenticated/ Podcast Produced and edited by the team at ResilientVoiceMedia.com Contact us for expert podcast production and support.