Surreal Estate, Vol. 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities

CHAPTER 13: Buckle up, kids, as we take a trip 130 years in the past to the south and the east of Glitter City, VA, to meet the Governess and her three charges, Charles, Sabrina, and Master Timothy Magistrate. At bedtime, the Governess regales the kids with a spine-tingling tale about the Soldier of Fortune, a double-crossed Civil War mercenary who may still have ties to this god-forsaken property. ***AUDACIOUS INDIE AUTHOR, Nikolas Allen, presents Volume 1 of his sophomore trilogy, SURREAL ESTATE. This spicy speculative fiction series launches with a wild, raunchy, fun and farcical adventure that no courageous reader should dare miss!SURREAL ESTATE, VOLUME 1: THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF ABSURDITIES2035 A.D.—IN THE BUSTLING METRØPOLIS OF GLITTER CITY, VA, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount, a snarky, self-centered hustler, navigates a series of mind-boggling scenarios that redefine the boundaries of absürdity. When his latest listing mørphs into a haunted hell ride of epic proportions, Max is finally forced to examine his own foibles.But is he ready for Change to rear its ugly head?Like an explicit mashup of Scooby-Doozy, Selling Sunsetz, and Rocky Horrorz, Surreal Estate, Volume 1 is a high-stakes excursion into the Surreal world of modern Real Estate and beyønd.Including original song lyrics, prayers, poetry, naughty drink recipes, and bippety-bop-bap-biggety-bam rhythmic interludes, this TWISTED SOAP ROCK OPERA will have you standing up and singing along in no time!###CREDITS:Chapter Text and Narration by Nikolas Allen.Stream and Download Free Music at NikolasAllenMusic.com“Surreal Estate, Volume 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities,” Now Available in Paperback ($14.99) and eBook ($2.99). Get full access to PodFiction by Nikolas Allen at nikolasallen.substack.com/subscribe

CHAPTER 12: Urban Muse Gallery owner, Riley Valor, and her crew prepare for a new art exhibit. Her boyfriend du jour, Max Discount, stops by the gallery to apologize for their breakfast interuptus at Quip’s. Due to a clumsy combination of white lies and half-truths, Max manages to rise even higher on Riley’s Shit List than he already was.***AUDACIOUS INDIE AUTHOR, Nikolas Allen, presents Volume 1 of his sophomore trilogy, SURREAL ESTATE. This spicy speculative fiction series launches with a wild, raunchy, fun and farcical adventure that no courageous reader should dare miss!SURREAL ESTATE, VOLUME 1: THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF ABSURDITIES2035 A.D.—IN THE BUSTLING METRØPOLIS OF GLITTER CITY, VA, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount, a snarky, self-centered hustler, navigates a series of mind-boggling scenarios that redefine the boundaries of absürdity. When his latest listing mørphs into a haunted hell ride of epic proportions, Max is finally forced to examine his own foibles.But is he ready for Change to rear its ugly head?Like an explicit mashup of Scooby-Doozy, Selling Sunsetz, and Rocky Horrorz, Surreal Estate, Volume 1 is a high-stakes excursion into the Surreal world of modern Real Estate and beyønd.Including original song lyrics, prayers, poetry, naughty drink recipes, and bippety-bop-bap-biggety-bam rhythmic interludes, this TWISTED SOAP ROCK OPERA will have you standing up and singing along in no time!###CREDITS:Chapter Text and Narration by Nikolas Allen.“Diggety-Town” Written and Performed by Nikolas Allen.Stream and Download Free Music at NikolasAllenMusic.com“Surreal Estate, Volume 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities,” Now Available in Paperback ($14.99) and eBook ($2.99). Get full access to PodFiction by Nikolas Allen at nikolasallen.substack.com/subscribe

CHAPTER 11: Max Discount visits City Hall to get updates on a big shot client’s project that’s been held up by bureaucratic stall tactics. City Planner, Mr. Eugene Jenkins, reveals a preposterous new ordinance that could kill the whole deal.***AUDACIOUS INDIE AUTHOR, Nikolas Allen, presents Volume 1 of his sophomore trilogy, SURREAL ESTATE. This spicy speculative fiction series launches with a wild, raunchy, fun and farcical adventure that no courageous reader should dare miss!SURREAL ESTATE, VOLUME 1: THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF ABSURDITIES2035 A.D.—IN THE BUSTLING METRØPOLIS OF GLITTER CITY, VA, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount, a snarky, self-centered hustler, navigates a series of mind-boggling scenarios that redefine the boundaries of absürdity. When his latest listing mørphs into a haunted hell ride of epic proportions, Max is finally forced to examine his own foibles.But is he ready for Change to rear its ugly head?Like an explicit mashup of Scooby-Doozy, Selling Sunsetz, and Rocky Horrorz, Surreal Estate, Volume 1 is a high-stakes excursion into the Surreal world of modern Real Estate and beyønd.Including original song lyrics, prayers, poetry, naughty drink recipes, and bippety-bop-bap-biggety-bam rhythmic interludes, this TWISTED SOAP ROCK OPERA will have you standing up and singing along in no time!###CREDITS:Chapter Text, Narration, and Music by Nikolas Allen.Stream and Download Free Music at NikolasAllenMusic.com“Surreal Estate, Volume 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities,” Now Available in Paperback ($14.99) and eBook ($2.99). Get full access to PodFiction by Nikolas Allen at nikolasallen.substack.com/subscribe

CHAPTER 10: Max Discount meets colleague Amina Patel in the break room of their brokerage to discuss the offers Amina has received on Dame MacElroy’s Victorian. Max lets it slip that he got a weird call about a haunted listing, which kickstarts Amina’s competitive streak.***AUDACIOUS INDIE AUTHOR, Nikolas Allen, presents Volume 1 of his sophomore trilogy, SURREAL ESTATE. This spicy speculative fiction series launches with a wild, raunchy, fun and farcical adventure that no courageous reader should dare miss!SURREAL ESTATE, VOLUME 1: THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF ABSURDITIES2035 A.D.—IN THE BUSTLING METRØPOLIS OF GLITTER CITY, VA, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount, a snarky, self-centered hustler, navigates a series of mind-boggling scenarios that redefine the boundaries of absürdity. When his latest listing mørphs into a haunted hell ride of epic proportions, Max is finally forced to examine his own foibles.But is he ready for Change to rear its ugly head?Like an explicit mashup of Scooby-Doozy, Selling Sunsetz, and Rocky Horrorz, Surreal Estate, Volume 1 is a high-stakes excursion into the Surreal world of modern Real Estate and beyønd.Including original song lyrics, prayers, poetry, naughty drink recipes, and bippety-bop-bap-biggety-bam rhythmic interludes, this TWISTED SOAP ROCK OPERA will have you standing up and singing along in no time!###CREDITS:Chapter Text, Narration, and Music by Nikolas Allen.Stream and Download Free Music at NikolasAllenMusic.com“Surreal Estate, Volume 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities,” Now Available in Paperback ($14.99) and eBook ($2.99). Get full access to PodFiction by Nikolas Allen at nikolasallen.substack.com/subscribe

CHAPTER 9: Max and Riley’s morning breakfast at Quips Coffee & Comedy Cafe is cut short when Zara Blake shows up unexpectedly and lets it slip that she and Max hung out the other night. Quips owner, Ollie Thompson, tries to deter Max from taking a haunted listing. Max’s competitive colleague, Amina Patel, calls to tell Max about her offers on Dame MacElroy’s Victorian, but Max makes plans to meet at the office to hear about it in person. ***AUDACIOUS INDIE AUTHOR, Nikolas Allen, presents Volume 1 of his sophomore trilogy, SURREAL ESTATE. This spicy speculative fiction series launches with a wild, raunchy, fun and farcical adventure that no courageous reader should dare miss!SURREAL ESTATE, VOLUME 1: THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF ABSURDITIES2035 A.D.—IN THE BUSTLING METRØPOLIS OF GLITTER CITY, VA, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount, a snarky, self-centered hustler, navigates a series of mind-boggling scenarios that redefine the boundaries of absürdity. When his latest listing mørphs into a haunted hell ride of epic proportions, Max is finally forced to examine his own foibles.But is he ready for Change to rear its ugly head?Like an explicit mashup of Scooby-Doozy, Selling Sunsetz, and Rocky Horrorz, Surreal Estate, Volume 1 is a high-stakes excursion into the Surreal world of modern Real Estate and beyønd.Including original song lyrics, prayers, poetry, naughty drink recipes, and bippety-bop-bap-biggety-bam rhythmic interludes, this TWISTED SOAP ROCK OPERA will have you standing up and singing along in no time!###CREDITS:Chapter Text, Narration, and Music by Nikolas Allen.Stream and Download Free Music at NikolasAllenMusic.com“Surreal Estate, Volume 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities,” Now Available in Paperback ($14.99) and eBook ($2.99). Get full access to PodFiction by Nikolas Allen at nikolasallen.substack.com/subscribe

CHAPTER 8: Putting the spice in Spicy Speculative Fiction, things heat up at Max Discount’s downtown loft he and girlfriend, Riley Valor get down and dirty while Max’s sm@rt homebøt, Nexus, captures it all in hi-def like a leering old perv. A mysterious early morning phone call from a potential client sets a new adventure in motion.***AUDACIOUS INDIE AUTHOR, Nikolas Allen, presents Volume 1 of his sophomore trilogy, SURREAL ESTATE. This spicy speculative fiction series launches with a wild, raunchy, fun and farcical adventure that no courageous reader should dare miss!SURREAL ESTATE, VOLUME 1: THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF ABSURDITIES2035 A.D.—IN THE BUSTLING METRØPOLIS OF GLITTER CITY, VA, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount, a snarky, self-centered hustler, navigates a series of mind-boggling scenarios that redefine the boundaries of absürdity. When his latest listing mørphs into a haunted hell ride of epic proportions, Max is finally forced to examine his own foibles.But is he ready for Change to rear its ugly head?Like an explicit mashup of Scooby-Doozy, Selling Sunsetz, and Rocky Horrorz, Surreal Estate, Volume 1 is a high-stakes excursion into the Surreal world of modern Real Estate and beyønd.Including original song lyrics, prayers, poetry, naughty drink recipes, and bippety-bop-bap-biggety-bam rhythmic interludes, this TWISTED SOAP ROCK OPERA will have you standing up and singing along in no time!###CREDITS:Chapter Text, Narration, and Music by Nikolas Allen.Stream and Download Free Music at NikolasAllenMusic.com“Surreal Estate, Volume 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities,” Now Available in Paperback ($14.99) and eBook ($2.99). Get full access to PodFiction by Nikolas Allen at nikolasallen.substack.com/subscribe

CHAPTER 7: Superstar Surrealtor, Max Discount, is chilling at his loft when his girlfriend, Riley Valor, decides to take him up on his offer to stop by. He whips up his famous Shrimp Scampi and they catch up over a delicious meal paired with crisp wine and a perfect musical soundtrack from his massive vinyl collection.***AUDACIOUS INDIE AUTHOR, Nikolas Allen, presents Volume 1 of his sophomore trilogy, SURREAL ESTATE. This spicy speculative fiction series launches with a wild, raunchy, fun and farcical adventure that no courageous reader should dare miss!SURREAL ESTATE, VOLUME 1: THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF ABSURDITIES2035 A.D.—IN THE BUSTLING METRØPOLIS OF GLITTER CITY, VA, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount, a snarky, self-centered hustler, navigates a series of mind-boggling scenarios that redefine the boundaries of absürdity. When his latest listing mørphs into a haunted hell ride of epic proportions, Max is finally forced to examine his own foibles.But is he ready for Change to rear its ugly head?Like an explicit mashup of Scooby-Doozy, Selling Sunsetz, and Rocky Horrorz, Surreal Estate, Volume 1 is a high-stakes excursion into the Surreal world of modern Real Estate and beyønd.Including original song lyrics, prayers, poetry, naughty drink recipes, and bippety-bop-bap-biggety-bam rhythmic interludes, this TWISTED SOAP ROCK OPERA will have you standing up and singing along in no time!###CREDITS:Chapter Text and Narration by Nikolas Allen.“The Last Time” by Bessy Goodlove—Written and Performed by Nikolas Allen.Stream and Download Free Music at NikolasAllenMusic.com“Surreal Estate, Volume 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities,” Now Available in Paperback ($14.99) and eBook ($2.99). Get full access to PodFiction by Nikolas Allen at nikolasallen.substack.com/subscribe

CHAPTER 6: Superstar Surrealtor, Max Discount, chose to meet ex-with-history, Zara Blake, for dinner the previous night instead of girlfriend, Riley Valor. Now feeling guilty, he places an apology call that goes unanswered. Hunkered at his downtown loft, he gets lost in the hustle of Surreal Estate deals he’s managing, while setting the stage for a night he hopes Riley still might crash.***AUDACIOUS INDIE AUTHOR, Nikolas Allen, presents Volume 1 of his sophomore trilogy, SURREAL ESTATE. This spicy speculative fiction series launches with a wild, raunchy, fun and farcical adventure that no courageous reader should dare miss!SURREAL ESTATE, VOLUME 1: THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF ABSURDITIES2035 A.D.—IN THE BUSTLING METRØPOLIS OF GLITTER CITY, VA, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount, a snarky, self-centered hustler, navigates a series of mind-boggling scenarios that redefine the boundaries of absürdity. When his latest listing mørphs into a haunted hell ride of epic proportions, Max is finally forced to examine his own foibles.But is he ready for Change to rear its ugly head?Like an explicit mashup of Scooby-Doozy, Selling Sunsetz, and Rocky Horrorz, Surreal Estate, Volume 1 is a high-stakes excursion into the Surreal world of modern Real Estate and beyønd.Including original song lyrics, prayers, poetry, naughty drink recipes, and bippety-bop-bap-biggety-bam rhythmic interludes, this TWISTED SOAP ROCK OPERA will have you standing up and singing along in no time!###CREDITS:Chapter Text and Narration by Nikolas Allen.“Batcave” Written and Performed by Nikolas Allen.“Trifecta” Produced by Nikolas Allen.Stream and Download Free Music at NikolasAllenMusic.com“Surreal Estate, Volume 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities,” Now Available in Paperback ($14.99) and eBook ($2.99). Get full access to PodFiction by Nikolas Allen at nikolasallen.substack.com/subscribe

CHAPTER 5: After a late night a Pigstye Pork n’ Pull, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount races across town to show a $12 million dollar mansion to notorious pop diva, Mimi Stardust. Too bad her sycophantic swarm of hangers-on leads the showing right off the rails.***AUDACIOUS INDIE AUTHOR, Nikolas Allen, presents Volume 1 of his sophomore trilogy, SURREAL ESTATE. This spicy speculative fiction series launches with a wild, raunchy, fun and farcical adventure that no courageous reader should dare miss!SURREAL ESTATE, VOLUME 1: THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF ABSURDITIES2035 A.D.—IN THE BUSTLING METRØPOLIS OF GLITTER CITY, VA, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount, a snarky, self-centered hustler, navigates a series of mind-boggling scenarios that redefine the boundaries of absürdity. When his latest listing mørphs into a haunted hell ride of epic proportions, Max is finally forced to examine his own foibles.But is he ready for Change to rear its ugly head?Like an explicit mashup of Scooby-Doozy, Selling Sunsetz, and Rocky Horrorz, Surreal Estate, Volume 1 is a high-stakes excursion into the Surreal world of modern Real Estate and beyønd.Including original song lyrics, prayers, poetry, naughty drink recipes, and bippety-bop-bap-biggety-bam rhythmic interludes, this TWISTED SOAP ROCK OPERA will have you standing up and singing along in no time!###CREDITS:Chapter Text and Narration by Nikolas Allen.“Bad Love,” Written and Performed by Nikolas Allen.Stream and Download Free Music at NikolasAllenMusic.com“Surreal Estate, Volume 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities,” Now Available in Paperback ($14.99) and eBook ($2.99). Get full access to PodFiction by Nikolas Allen at nikolasallen.substack.com/subscribe

CHAPTER 4: Instead of joining girlfriend, Riley Valor, for dinner at Sterling Steakhouse, Superstar Surrealtor, Max Discount heads downtown to meet his ex-with-history, Zara Blake, at Pigstye Pork n’ Pull. When she shows up with Willy Icon, a dude from work, Max’s prurient plans are totes cock-blocked by that little third wheel bastard. ***AUDACIOUS INDIE AUTHOR, Nikolas Allen, presents Volume 1 of his sophomore trilogy, SURREAL ESTATE. This spicy speculative fiction series launches with a wild, raunchy, fun and farcical adventure that no courageous reader should dare miss!SURREAL ESTATE, VOLUME 1: THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF ABSURDITIES2035 A.D.—IN THE BUSTLING METRØPOLIS OF GLITTER CITY, VA, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount, a snarky, self-centered hustler, navigates a series of mind-boggling scenarios that redefine the boundaries of absürdity. When his latest listing mørphs into a haunted hell ride of epic proportions, Max is finally forced to examine his own foibles.But is he ready for Change to rear its ugly head?Like an explicit mashup of Scooby-Doozy, Selling Sunsetz, and Rocky Horrorz, Surreal Estate, Volume 1 is a high-stakes excursion into the Surreal world of modern Real Estate and beyønd.Including original song lyrics, prayers, poetry, naughty drink recipes, and bippety-bop-bap-biggety-bam rhythmic interludes, this TWISTED SOAP ROCK OPERA will have you standing up and singing along in no time!###CREDITS:Chapter Text and Narration by Nikolas Allen.“Stand Up & Sing Aløng,” Written and Performed by Nikolas Allen.“Dirty Nøuveau Høuse Müsic,” Produced by Nikolas Allen.Stream and Download Free Music at NikolasAllenMusic.com“Surreal Estate, Volume 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities,” Now Available in Paperback ($14.99) and eBook ($2.99). Get full access to PodFiction by Nikolas Allen at nikolasallen.substack.com/subscribe

CHAPTER 3: At an unhinged open house for Surrealtor Amina Patel’s client, Dame MacElroy, potential buyers compete in a bizarre Battle of the Bids for a chance to purchase a gorgeous $4M Victorian. Ruthless Surreal Estate Developers, Victor and Misty Donovan, throw their hat in the ring with a sexy synchronized swimming routine. ***AUDACIOUS INDIE AUTHOR, Nikolas Allen, presents Volume 1 of his sophomore trilogy, SURREAL ESTATE. This spicy speculative fiction series launches with a wild, raunchy, fun and farcical adventure that no courageous reader should dare miss!SURREAL ESTATE, VOLUME 1: THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF ABSURDITIES2035 A.D.—IN THE BUSTLING METRØPOLIS OF GLITTER CITY, VA, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount, a snarky, self-centered hustler, navigates a series of mind-boggling scenarios that redefine the boundaries of absürdity. When his latest listing mørphs into a haunted hell ride of epic proportions, Max is finally forced to examine his own foibles.But is he ready for Change to rear its ugly head?Like an explicit mashup of Scooby-Doozy, Selling Sunsetz, and Rocky Horrorz, Surreal Estate, Volume 1 is a high-stakes excursion into the Surreal world of modern Real Estate and beyønd.Including original song lyrics, prayers, poetry, naughty drink recipes, and bippety-bop-bap-biggety-bam rhythmic interludes, this TWISTED SOAP ROCK OPERA will have you standing up and singing along in no time!###CREDITS:Chapter Text and Narration by Nikolas Allen.“Stand Up & Sing Along,” Written and Performed by Nikolas Allen.“DJ Beetjøven,” Produced by Nikolas Allen.“All You Got,” Written by Nikolas Allen and Ryan Bouslaugh. Performed by Red Pill Collective. Listen to Red Pill Collective on your fave streaming platform. Stream and Download Free Music at NikolasAllenMusic.com“Surreal Estate, Volume 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities,” Now Available in Paperback ($14.99) and eBook ($2.99). Get full access to PodFiction by Nikolas Allen at nikolasallen.substack.com/subscribe

CHAPTER 2: At an unhinged open house for Surrealtor Amina Patel’s client, Dame MacElroy, potential buyers compete in a bizarre Battle of the Bids for a chance to purchase a gorgeous $4M Victorian. First up are the Rappin’ Rizzos, a legendary Italian interior design duo who know how to rock a mic.***AUDACIOUS INDIE AUTHOR, Nikolas Allen, presents Volume 1 of his sophomore trilogy, SURREAL ESTATE. This spicy speculative fiction series launches with a wild, raunchy, fun and farcical adventure that no courageous reader should dare miss!SURREAL ESTATE, VOLUME 1: THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF ABSURDITIES2035 A.D.—IN THE BUSTLING METRØPOLIS OF GLITTER CITY, VA, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount, a snarky, self-centered hustler, navigates a series of mind-boggling scenarios that redefine the boundaries of absürdity. When his latest listing mørphs into a haunted hell ride of epic proportions, Max is finally forced to examine his own foibles.But is he ready for Change to rear its ugly head?Like an explicit mashup of Scooby-Doozy, Selling Sunsetz, and Rocky Horrorz, Surreal Estate, Volume 1 is a high-stakes excursion into the Surreal world of modern Real Estate and beyønd.Including original song lyrics, prayers, poetry, naughty drink recipes, and bippety-bop-bap-biggety-bam rhythmic interludes, this TWISTED SOAP ROCK OPERA will have you standing up and singing along in no time!###CREDITS: Chapter 2 text and narration by Nikolas Allen. ”Stand Up & Sing Along,” Written and Performed by Nikolas Allen.“The Rappin’ Rizzos” Written and Performed by Nikolas Allen. Stream and download Free Music at nikolasallenmusic.com“Surreal Estate, Volume 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities” Now Available in Paperback ($14.99) and eBook ($2.99). Get full access to PodFiction by Nikolas Allen at nikolasallen.substack.com/subscribe

CHAPTER 1: Superstar Surrealtor, Max Discount, is a snarky, self-centered playboy in Glitter City, VA. This workaholic hustler goes hard always in all ways. Hop inside his Pontiac Trans Am—and his twisted mind—as he races toward an open house hosted by Amina Patel, his competitive co-worker at Château Røyale Luxe Listings, Inc.***AUDACIOUS INDIE AUTHOR, Nikolas Allen, presents Volume 1 of his sophomore trilogy, SURREAL ESTATE. This spicy speculative fiction series launches with a wild, raunchy, fun and farcical adventure that no courageous reader should dare miss!SURREAL ESTATE, VOLUME 1: THE HAUNTED HOUSE OF ABSURDITIES2035 A.D.—IN THE BUSTLING METRØPOLIS OF GLITTER CITY, VA, Superstar Surrealtor Max Discount, a snarky, self-centered hustler, navigates a series of mind-boggling scenarios that redefine the boundaries of absürdity. When his latest listing mørphs into a haunted hell ride of epic proportions, Max is finally forced to examine his own foibles.But is he ready for Change to rear its ugly head?Like an explicit mashup of Scooby-Doozy, Selling Sunsetz, and Rocky Horrorz, Surreal Estate, Volume 1 is a high-stakes excursion into the Surreal world of modern Real Estate and beyønd.Including original song lyrics, prayers, poetry, naughty drink recipes, and bippety-bop-bap-biggety-bam rhythmic interludes, this TWISTED SOAP ROCK OPERA will have you standing up and singing along in no time!###CREDITS:Chapter 1 text and narration by Nikolas Allen.”Stand Up & Sing Along” Written and Performed by Nikolas Allen.“Just What The Doctor Ordered”Written by N. Allen, R. Bouslaugh.Performed by Red Pill CollectiveListen to RPC on your fave streaming platform.Download Free Music at nikolasallenmusic.com“Surreal Estate, Volume 1: The Haunted House of Absurdities” Now Available in Paperback ($14.99) and eBook ($2.99). Get full access to PodFiction by Nikolas Allen at nikolasallen.substack.com/subscribe