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Healing for Love
A podcast for anyone who wants to stop shrinking, start healing, and grow into their most grounded, authentic self in love & life.
Hosted by Dr Gemma Gladstone — relationship coach, former clinical psychologist (25+ years), and expert in schema healing — this podcast offers thoughtful, insight-rich episodes to help you understand your patterns, heal from past emotional wounds, and gently rewrite your relationship template.
If you’ve ever felt stuck in familiar dynamics — seeking approval, fearing abandonment, dating narcissists or losing yourself in relationships — you’re not alone. Healing for Love is a space for self-reflection, emotional insight, and steady encouragement. Here, you’ll learn how to reconnect with your worth, trust your inner voice, and build relationships that support who you truly are.
This is for the woman who’s ready to feel more secure, more whole, and more herself — in love and in life.
141 Episodes
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Send Gemma a message In today’s episode, I answer a short but powerful question that came in anonymously: “Hi Gemma, I cannot even get a match, let alone a date. What the hell is wrong with me?”If you’ve ever stared at a dating app wondering why nothing is happening and quietly concluded “it must be me”, this episode is for you. I'll look at three key areas: The reality of modern dating apps – why they create a distorted, “smorgasbord” environment where incredible, emotionally available peopl...
Send Gemma a message We hear the term “emotionally unavailable” all the time, yet many women are not sure what the opposite actually looks like in real life. In this episode, Gemma breaks down emotional availability in clear, practical terms, so you can recognise it early, feel safer in your body and stop settling for relationships that leave you guessing. Gemma also explores how schemas like Emotional Deprivation and Abandonment shape what feels “normal” in love, why emotionally safe partner...
Send Gemma a message Dating can stir up every schema you have. If you have a history of emotionally unavailable partners, narcissistic relationships or spending years in situationships that never really went anywhere, getting back out there can feel both hopeful and terrifying. In this episode I walk you through ten grounded mindset shifts that help you stay in Healthy Adult mode while you date so you can notice red flags, take in green flags and stop abandoning yourself in the process. I tal...
Send Gemma a message In this episode, Gemma unpacks The Sorry Reflex - the automatic urge to apologise, even when we’ve done nothing wrong. Rooted in the subjugation schema, this coping behaviour often begins in childhood, where expressing needs or disagreeing felt unsafe. When our nervous system equates disapproval with danger, “sorry” becomes a way to stay safe and connected. Gemma explains how this pattern shows up in dating, relationships, and everyday interactions - especially for women ...
Send Gemma a message If you are asking can this improve, this episode gives you a simple lens. Gemma unpacks two essential capacities that predict whether change is possible in a relationship. You will hear why the brain repeats what is familiar, how schemas drive loops and how to assess real readiness for growth in yourself and in someone you are dating. In this episode Why patterns repeat even when you want something differentThe role of schemas in attraction, conflict and copingTwo essenti...
Send Gemma a message What limerence really is, why it hooks into our deepest unmet needs and how to gently unhook using a schema-therapy lens. In Part 2, Gemma explores limerence as a preoccupying, often intoxicating state that’s fueled by unmet needs - with abandonment and emotional deprivation schemas usually at the core. She explains why the brain’s reward systems (hello, dopamine) and a quieted prefrontal cortex can hijack rationality, making red flags easy to miss. You’ll learn practical...
Send Gemma a message 🎁 Download Free Guide: Dating With Insight 🩷 Love Wisely Priority list for Feb '26 💛 Access Elevate You Worth: Self-Worth Healing Bundle If you’ve ever been mentally and emotionally stuck on someone - checking for “signs,” fantasising a future and riding waves of hope and anxiety, then you may have experienced limerence. In Part 1, Gemma explains what limerence is (and isn’t), why uncertainty and fantasy make it so sticky and why the real issue isn’t the pers...
Send Gemma a message A listener asks: “What exactly is narcissism and how can I tell if I’m dating someone with narcissistic traits?” In this episode, Gemma breaks narcissism down into plain English. You’ll learn why it’s best understood as a personality style on a spectrum, how narcissistic coping modes show up through self-absorption and poor tolerance for your subjectivity and the concrete signs to look for in the early dating stage. We also cover boundaries, reciprocity and practic...
Send Gemma a message Enrollments are Open, Doors Close Wednesday 17th 11:59PM (AEST) In this short bonus episode, I’m giving you a clear picture of what’s inside my 12-week group coaching program, Love Wisely, which begins Wednesday, September 24th. This program is for women who are ready to break free from old relationship patterns - especially the pull toward emotionally unavailable or narcissistic partners and finally rewrite their Love Template so they can choose relationships that feel s...
Send Gemma a message Gemma answers the most common questions she’s received about Love Wisely and widens the lens to address the deeper fears and limiting beliefs that stop women from changing their relationship patterns. You’ll learn how schemas (like abandonment, emotional deprivation, defectiveness/shame, subjugation, approval-seeking and unrelenting standards) quietly shape attraction, tolerance, and your choices and what it looks like to shift from fear-driven decisions to wise, Healthy ...
Send Gemma a message When your heart wants closeness but your “old map” keeps pulling you toward distance, you’re stuck in the Catch-22 of attraction. In this episode, Gemma explains how early schemas quietly shape who you’re drawn to, why “chemistry” so often points you toward the familiar (not the healthy), and what it takes to consciously rewrite your Love Template so you can choose emotionally available partners. In this episode, you’ll learn What a schema is (quick primer) and why it’s m...
Send Gemma a message In this episode I answer a listener Q from “Maddie,” who’s in post-breakup limbo with an avoidant ex. I unpack blurred boundaries after a breakup, why “staying friends” can quietly erode self-respect, how trauma bonds differ from schema-triggered dynamics, and what it really takes to let go when your abandonment schema is pulling you back. You’ll also get a simple Relationship Review exercise to spot your patterns so you can date with clearer self-trust next time. What w...
Send Gemma a message Why do caring, empathic women end up doing the heavy lifting in love, staying out of guilt and “rescuing” partners at the expense of their own needs? In this episode, Gemma unpacks the unconscious pull to fix others, how childhood patterns (self-sacrifice, subjugation, emotional deprivation) set the stage, and the real cost of over-functioning. You’ll learn how to shift from “fixer” to “feeler,” build healthy entitlement, and make self-supporting choices, even when guilt ...
Send Gemma a message Every past relationship leaves clues. Patterns you’ve fallen into. The kinds of people you’re drawn to. The roles you find yourself playing without even realising it. In this episode of Healing for Love, I’m walking you through 6 powerful reflection questions to help you see your love life more clearly and prepare you to approach dating in a new way. These are the same questions I explore with my Love Wisely clients, because when you understand you...
Send Gemma a message Have you ever looked back at a relationship and thought, “Why didn’t I walk away sooner?” You’re not alone — and it’s not about weakness or denial. In this episode, Dr. Gemma Gladstone explores seven powerful psychological reasons we tend to ignore red flags in relationships — especially in the early stages. Drawing on schema therapy, attachment theory, and decades of clinical experience, Gemma breaks down why patterns like schema chemistry, abandonment fears, self...
Send Gemma a message Meet Sophie, a 37-year-old woman who spent years feeling stuck in painful relationship cycles. Like many women I work with, she kept attracting emotionally unavailable or narcissistic men — despite knowing, deep down, that something wasn’t right. In this episode, I’ll walk you through Sophie’s journey: from identifying her relational schemas (like abandonment, emotional deprivation, and subjugation), to understanding how her childhood shaped her “love template,” to the po...
Send Gemma a message In this important solo episode, Gemma reflects on a disturbing real-life conversation overheard between two teenage girls — one of whom casually describes being physically assaulted by her boyfriend. What follows is a powerful deep dive into why girls and women downplay harmful, even abusive, behaviour in relationships. From shame, trauma bonding, and fear of judgement to deeply rooted schemas like abandonment, defectiveness, and subjugation, Gemma explores the internal a...
Send Gemma a message In this solo episode, Gemma explores one of the most foundational concepts when it comes to healing relationship patterns—the abandonment schema. Whether you're currently dating or in a long-term relationship, understanding your own abandonment schema and how it influences your emotions, choices, and reactions is essential for cultivating emotional safety and secure connection. Gemma explains: What the abandonment schema is and how it developsHow it shows up in dating and...
Send Gemma a message The Red Flag Project – Learn how to break free from toxic relationship patterns – theredflagproject.com Schema Coaching & Support – Work with Dr. Gemma Gladstone Support the show 🎁 Download Free Guide: Dating With Insight 🩷 Love Wisely Priority list for Early March 2026 💛 Access Elevate You Worth: Self-Worth Healing Bundle Connect with Me 📷 Instagram: @drgemmagladstone 📧 Email: hello@drgemmagladstone.com for 1:1 coaching enquiries 🌐 Website: drgemmagladstone....
Send Gemma a message In this mailbox episode, we dive into a listener question from Amy (name changed for privacy), who is struggling with the trauma bond with her narcissistic and emotionally neglectful mother. Amy shares her experience of emotional neglect, manipulation, gaslighting, and rejection—all while navigating the complicated reality of trying to maintain boundaries. ✔ What a trauma bond with a parent looks like – Why it’s so difficult to break free ✔ The cycle of hope &...
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good one
Fantastic overview