Recovery Elevator

Today we have Pete. He is 40 years old, from Aspen, CO, and took his last drink on May 3rd, 2026.   This episode is brought to you by:   Café RE – use code CONNECT for your first month free Sign up and get 10% off your first month: Better Help   [02:53] Thoughts from Paul:   Paul reflects on a message he wrote to himself in 2014 when he realized he could no longer have both alcohol and the happy, fulfilling life he wanted. He taped a reminder to his wall: "If you want this, then you can't have that". Meaning if he wanted meaningful relationships, time in nature, a healthy body and mind, family, hobbies, and goals, alcohol couldn't be part of the picture.   After years of trying to moderate, Paul accepted that drinking the way he wanted to drink was incompatible with the life he hoped to build. He encourages listeners to ask themselves, without judgment, whether alcohol allows them to live the life they deserve. He acknowledges that choosing sobriety can mean making that decision repeatedly, especially in the beginning.   Paul also challenges the message Big Alcohol has promoted for decades: that people can have both alcohol and a happy, successful life.   [07:49] Paul introduces Pete:   Pete manages an Aspen music venue and has spent his career in the live music industry. He and his wife have been together since middle school and have three children. He enjoys making music and exploring Colorado's outdoors with his family. Pete had his first drink around age 11 or 12, growing up around musicians and alcohol. By high school, he was drinking every weekend, and he quickly realized one or two drinks were never enough. Alcohol quieted his mind, and soon the goal was to blackout.  The pattern continued through college, where he played in bands and drank heavily. After college, Pete started his career managing music venues. Drinking was part of the job: he could have several beers while working, then stay after closing until early morning. He was also introduced to cocaine as a way to keep drinking. Despite his consumption, he considered it fun and didn't see a problem. Around 2011, his father was diagnosed with brain cancer, Pete got married, and he took on opening a much larger venue. When his father died in 2012, Pete drank through his grief rather than addressing it. In 2019, Pete attended his first AA meeting. One piece of advice stayed with him: what other people think of him is none of his business. But he was scared off by advice that sobriety required leaving his wife, children, and job. He tried quitting through willpower, with periods of sobriety followed by drinking. During the pandemic, the music industry shut down, Pete became unemployed, and his drinking grew darker. He drank alone while his wife worked as a nurse and cared for their young children. Realizing he was missing precious time with his family, he tried quitting again. In 2021, he found RE and Ben's Friends, a support community for people in hospitality and related industries. After moving in 2024, Pete stayed sober for several months before returning to daily drinking. In May this year, concerned about his health and his family's future, he decided to intervene on himself rather than wait for a devastating rock bottom. Pete found a drug counselor, a new therapist, and psychiatric support. He told his wife he was in active addiction and needed her support while taking responsibility for his recovery. The next day, May 4th, he attended an AA meeting. This time, Pete leaned into his support system. He was open with his staff about not drinking and added more non-alcoholic options to the venue's menu. He no longer sees alcohol as a reward or something he has earned and reminds himself that he has never woken up sober wishing he had drunk the night before. Pete's parting piece of guidance: focus on the life that you can have without drinking.   Recovery Elevator You took the elevator down. You got to take the stairs back up. We can do this.   RE Instagram Books Sobriety Tracker iTunes  RE YouTube  

Today we have Greg. He is 44 years old, lives in Champaign, IL and took his last drink of alcohol on September 18th, 2026.   This episode is brought to you by:   Sober Link sign up and claim your $100 enrollment bonus Sign up and get 10% off your first month: Better Help   Check out this free guide to your first seven days without alcohol.   Mark your calendars! Registration for the 10th Anniversary Find Your People Retreat opens on April 1st, 2027. The retreat happens August 11th- 15th, 2027.     [02:52] Thoughts from Paul:   Paul shares with us the news that NFL Quarterbacks Drake May and Dak Prescott have recently become part owners of Athletic Brewing Company.    One of Paul's goals with RE is to eradicate the shame and the stigma around addiction. Because those two things are just as dangerous as the drug alcohol itself. This new partnership at Athletic Brewing is a huge step forward with that goal. This signifies a major tipping point on why this whole project with RE started over 10 years ago. Alcohol is shit. It is poison and will rot you from the inside out.   NA beers are becoming cooler by the day. The culture around drinking is changing and changing quickly.   DISCLAIMER: Please remember that only you can make the decision whether or not NA beers fit into your life. Some people find them triggering. Err on the side of caution and if you're in early sobriety, you may want to wait a little while before trying them for yourself.   [06:35] Paul introduces Greg:   Greg is a college professor who teaches theater and film. He is married with two boys and enjoys running, swimming and music.   Greg's first experience with alcohol came at a family Christmas party when he was 12 or 13. Sneaking rum into his eggnog gave him a warm, fuzzy feeling. After a traumatic breakup in high school, he turned to his parents' liquor cabinet, drinking alone because he felt rejected and isolated.   After turning 21, Greg began drinking every night. He knew it was a problem, and his girlfriend eventually warned him that he might have to stop altogether. Instead, he tried countless moderation attempts. Working in Chicago's theater and restaurant scenes where drinking is part of the culture, his alcohol intake grew over time. After moving to Los Angeles, Greg suffered with anxiety and depression. He began day-drinking and secretly hiding vodka. Even after being fired from his bartending job, he struggled to make a lasting change. Graduate school brought structure and some of the happiest years of his life, but alcohol remained part of his daily routine. For the next 15 years, he typically drank five to ten drinks every night.   Life brought moves to Brooklyn and El Paso, marriage, two children and his career. Through it all, Greg continued drinking. When a knee injury took running away, alcohol became a way to manage pain and fill unstructured time. Over the last year, stress and changing work demands pulled away more of his guardrails. His drinking escalated and sometimes began in the morning. He was sneaking vodka into professional settings and drinking during the night to get back to sleep.   After waking from a nap and feeling broken, Greg told his wife he couldn't keep living this way. He asked her to call a detox center, realizing that getting help felt less exhausting than continuing to drink. Before going, he began burning the ships, telling his family and the musicians he played with at church what was happening.   At seven days sober, Greg is beginning to experience more presence and energy. Peace is still a work in progress, but he is taking the first steps toward a life that no longer revolves around alcohol.   Greg's advice for those newly sober or thinking about getting sober: "You may not be ready yet. I wasn't ready for a very, very long time. But when you come to that moment where something tells you that you're ready, just grasp it, seize it."   Recovery Elevator You took the elevator down. You got to take the stairs back up. We can do this.   Café RE RE Instagram RE YouTube Books  

Today we have Jennifer. She is 49 years old, lives in Orange County, CA and she took her last drink on July 13th, 2026.   This episode is brought to you by:   Café RE – use code CONNECT for your first month free Sign up and get 10% off your first month: Better Help   You may have noticed there is a new podcast intro and outro song on this episode by our very own Pablo Church. The song is now available on Spotify and Apple Music.   [02:55] Thoughts from Paul:   Paul shares with us an article posted by CNN which was sent to him by a listener. The article argues that recovery doesn't have to mean full abstinence, that science has evolved, that alcohol use disorder exists on a spectrum, and that some people can return to moderate drinking. When Paul read that the NIAAA was involved, the entire article lost credibility. After a big study in the mid-2010's claimed that alcohol was good for us, it was uncovered that the study was sponsored by Big Alcohol.   This article uses Brad Pitt's return to drinking in a more restrained manner after seven years of sobriety as concrete data. Big Alcohol has lost almost a trillion dollars of sales in the last five years. Alcohol consumption is down and the sober curious movement is gaining momentum. So, it seems convenient that this article drops saying "hey, maybe you don't have to quit after all".   We don't know if this article was funded by Big Alcohol, but it doesn't line up with all that we see and hear in the trenches.   [10:06] Paul introduces Jennifer:   Jennifer is a registered nurse and dog mom to three French bulldogs, now exploring who she is in sobriety.   Jennifer says she has always chased a change in how she felt. In high school, drugs were easier to access than alcohol, but once she turned 21, drinking became her focus. She and her friends drank heavily, and she assumed it was simply what people did in their twenties.   Around age 30, Jennifer got a DUI. As a nurse, she had to report it to the Nursing Board and enter a diversion program. She attended AA, rehab, and support groups, worked with a sponsor, and completed the steps to protect her nursing license. Privately, she questioned whether she truly believed she was an alcoholic. She eventually returned to nursing in a non-patient-facing role and remained sober for more than nine years.   Her relapse began unexpectedly when she went out after work and ordered a whiskey without planning to drink. She was unhappy in her marriage, had stopped attending meetings, and had drifted away from her sober community. After separating from her husband, she dated someone who introduced her to the Los Angeles nightlife she had long romanticized. Drinking escalated quickly, and for the next eight or nine years she repeatedly tried to moderate.   Eventually, alcohol stopped being about fun. Jennifer drank to stop the shakes and palpitations, avoid feeling sick, and get through basic tasks. On July 12th, she admitted to her fiancé that she had already been drinking at 10 a.m. The next day became her last drink, though she initially told herself she only needed to dry out and feel better.   The first month was difficult, but she found RE and began hearing pieces of her own story in others' experiences. She felt relief in letting go of the exhausting cycle of planning how to moderate. This time, she chose to do recovery differently: she started therapy, joined Café RE, and began reaching out to the community despite feeling uncomfortable putting herself out there.   At 73 days sober, Jennifer says her sleep and well-being have improved. Most of all, she wakes without fear of what she might have said or done the night before—and without immediately planning when she can drink again. She is learning that connection can help her stay sober and that she doesn't have to figure it all out alone.   Jennifer's parting piece of guidance: Don't overcomplicate it.   Recovery Elevator We took the elevator down. We got to take the stairs back up. We can do this.   RE Instagram Books Sobriety Tracker iTunes  RE YouTube  

Today we have Taku. He is 44 years old, lives in Tokyo, Japan, and took his last drink on September 25th, 2021.   This episode is brought to you by:   Café RE – use code CONNECT for your first month free Sign up and get 10% off your first month: Better Help   You may have noticed there is a new podcast intro and outro song on this episode by our very own Pablo Church. The song will be available on Spotify and Apple Music next Monday, October 16th.   [03:40] Thoughts from Paul:   Paul reminds us of the difference between sobriety and recovery. Sobriety means not drinking alcohol, but simply removing alcohol doesn't necessarily address the reasons someone drank in the first place. While sobriety is an important step toward health and healing, recovery goes deeper.   Sobriety is abstinence, staying away from something. Recovery is abstinence, and getting to the root of unease that caused you to reach for the drink in the first place. Recovery is the opposite of a dry drunk but just being sober oftentimes goes hand in hand with being a dry drunk.   Recovery is creating a life where alcohol isn't needed. Ask yourself, are you sober or are you in recovery?   [09:07] Paul introduces Taku:   Taku currently lives in Japan and works in translation for an American company. He is married and they have no children. For fun, they enjoy specialty coffee and Taku enjoys playing music and attending live concerts.   Born in Japan and raised in the United States, Taku grew up navigating two cultures and languages. He often felt like he didn't quite belong, and social anxiety made it difficult to feel comfortable in his own skin. At 15 or 16, he discovered alcohol and immediately felt at home. Drinking eased his anxiety and made it easier to connect with people.   What began as a social lubricant escalated in college, where blackouts became part of the picture. After moving back to Japan and entering the corporate world, Taku relied on alcohol to transform from a reserved professional into the funny, outgoing guy at night. Losing his belongings and regretting things he said while drinking became familiar, but he rationalized the consequences.   In his late 30s, Taku transferred to Los Angeles, where his drinking intensified. He drank nightly and regularly drove drunk. During a vacation with his wife, he drank so much that an argument in a taxi led to police involvement and a night in a Riverside County jail. His visa was later revoked, and he quit his job and returned to Japan. Despite these consequences, he continued drinking heavily.   On September 25, 2021, Taku went out with his wife and friends determined to drink "like a gentleman." Instead, he blacked out again and received an angry text from his wife. The next morning, he finally recognized the cycle he had been repeating since his teens: drinking, making mistakes, apologizing, and promising to quit. He began to wonder what life might look like if he simply took alcohol out of the equation.   Taku found Paul's TED Talk and the Recovery Elevator podcast, which helped him commit to exploring sobriety. Two weeks later, he attended his first AA meeting in Tokyo. Despite his nervousness, he found a welcoming community where he could share the parts of his story he had hidden from others without being judged. Connecting with people who understood his experience helped him realize he didn't need alcohol to be himself or to feel that he belonged.   In his first year, Taku thought his drinking problem wasn't severe enough to require a sponsor or the 12 steps. Eventually, he recognized the value of facing his inner struggles and found a sponsor. Now, more than five years sober, he reflects on how accepting help and finding connection helped change his life.   Taku's parting piece of guidance for someone thinking about quitting drinking: "it gets easier, and it gets better."   Recovery Elevator We took the elevator down. We got to take the stairs back up. We can do this.   RE Instagram Café RE Books Sobriety Tracker iTunes  RE YouTube  

Today we have Lani. She is 38 years old, lives in Salt Lake City, UT and she took her last drink on June 9th, 2026.   This episode is brought to you by:   Soberlink – sign up and claim your $100 enrollment bonus Sign up and get 10% off: Better Help   [03:05] Thoughts from Paul:   Earlier this year David from episode 142 sent Paul the song Find Your People by Drew Holcomb & The Neighbors. Paul's first reaction was "holy crap, this song was written for Recovery Elevator". He rebranded the Bozeman Retreat into Find Your People Retreat and with the musical accompaniment of Uprise, the group sang this song every day.   The message within the lyrics reminds us that the opposite of addiction is connection and when you ditch the drink and find your people, your brain will heal. Your liver will send you a thank you card, your dopamine system will rewire, and life will smooth out.   You've heard so many times on this podcast that sobriety is all about recovering your authentic self, than you need to find yourself, and you need others to do that. When you find your people, then you find yourself.   [07:27] Paul introduces Lani:   Lani is 38 years old and works in the juvenile justice system, providing trauma-informed care to youth. She has a dog named Chip, a partner named Audrey, and enjoys hiking, kayaking, yoga, gardening, and spending time outdoors. Lani grew up in Utah in a home affected by chaos and her estranged father's alcoholism. Searching for belonging and structure, she became involved in the LDS church. She began drinking in high school despite promising herself she wouldn't follow in her father's footsteps. After leaving the church around 2010, alcohol gradually became a bigger part of her life, eventually progressing to daily drinking. In 2018, after graduating from college and recognizing that her relationship was toxic and her drinking was out of control, Lani planned to become a flight attendant. After drinking heavily, the night before an important test, she failed and felt something needed to change. She moved to Dallas and attended an AA meeting, where she found a sense of belonging and met her first sponsor. She stayed sober for about six months, even living out of her car and tent for a period while working and attending meetings. After moving back to Utah, Lani relapsed. Over the following years, she moved to Colorado and back to Utah, changed jobs, and experienced more difficult relationships. Despite periods of sobriety, including nearly seven months in 2024, she repeatedly returned to daily drinking. In October 2025, Lani went to treatment after a frightening experience involving alcohol and travel. She continued drinking after treatment, eventually reaching another breaking point during a trip to Seattle. After returning home, she tapered off alcohol to manage withdrawal symptoms and returned to an AA meeting on June 10th, 2026. Now 78 days sober at the time of recording, Lani is learning to let herself break, accept help, and stop pretending she is okay. She struggles with the concept of a higher power but is finding meaning in meditation, journaling, daily meetings, and connecting with nature. She is also learning to give herself permission to rest and allow recovery to unfold one day at a time. Lani's parting piece of guidance: Be patient with yourself and just try. There's no right or wrong way to do it. Invite someone in. Don't do it by yourself. There are people that are willing to talk with you about it. And if that's where it starts, let it be that. Recovery Elevator We took the elevator down. We got to take the stairs back up. We can do this.   Café RE RE Instagram Sobriety Tracker iTunes  RE YouTube