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I live with anxiety, depression, ADHD, autism, OCD & BPD — and this podcast shares the hard-fought lessons I’ve learned along the way.
This is lived-experience mental health, told with complete honesty and zero filter, including the vulnerable and significant moments that continue to shape my life today.
Through personal reflections, therapy insights, interviews, nervous system regulation, and real-world struggles, I explore what it means to live with complex mental illness — grounded in psychological science and research.
233 Episodes
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Some days are flat. The milestones drift. The questions feel heavier than they should. In this episode, I talk honestly about pressing pause on romance and pouring that energy into purpose — advocacy, community, and building work that actually fits the season I’m in. We unpack life with multiple diagnoses — generalised anxiety, social anxiety, OCD, ADHD, autism, BPD, bipolar II — without turning identity into a checklist. Dysregulated Daily is my way of showing the real picture: the wins, the...
Ever felt calmer in a roaring stadium than a quiet supermarket? In this episode, I unpack the strange maths of social anxiety and autism — and why a packed night at McDonald Jones Stadium can feel safer than a fluorescent aisle at Coles. I walk you through hyper-vigilance, sensory overload, and the stories my brain spins when I’m late, lost, or convinced someone’s in “my” seat. And underneath it all? Love. Love for the Newcastle Knights, for red and blue, and for the city that built me. We ta...
Right, picture this. It’s 2:30am. I’ve been bounced off half of Sydney’s motorways on the way back from Albury-Wodonga, the NSW/VIC border, and I’m talking myself through a full-blown panic attack because, well, everyone else is asleep. Zzzz Today started as a quick meet and greet and hit top gear — strapping freight, riding in an Kenworth and remembering why I love the transport industry so much. I’m trying to build something that brings trucking and mental health together… and for most of t...
Borderline Personality Disorder has a habit of sending me down to the beach, to ask the big questions about life. To try and think my way through its distortion of my reality. Just like the waves in front of me, this time the memories have come flooding in. In this episode I’m sitting on the sand at Bar Beach, where I revisit some of the hardest truths that I can only now accept, about love and relationships. Newcastle holds some very difficult memories of my battle with BPD (and the rest) bu...
Jay is someone I have wanted to interview on the podcast for a long time. And if you listen to his story you'll understand why. What really sets Jay and his story apart, for me at least, is the steps that have been made to be able to engage with life in a healthy, balanced manner. In this episode he introduces me to a new paradigm, one that I had been reluctant to accept. How the breath is the core component that underscores everything. How the breath used properly can dampen anxiety before c...
In this episode of The Dysregulated Podcast I talk about living without a “baseline” and the swings between days of huge momentum and days where everything stalls. Living with ADHD and BPD means my capacity isn’t always stable, and when I run hot — big output, little sleep, racing thoughts — it can feel productive right up until it isn’t. I unpack how workaholic thinking, the inner critic and impostor syndrome turn urgency into a virtue, and why that pattern has landed me in hospital bef...
Dysregulated Daily is a daily check-in video series designed to capture what the big episodes often miss, the reality of mental health day to day in all its chaotic forms. Instead of focusing only on mood, I introduce capacity as the core signal: how much usable emotional, cognitive, nervous-system, and functional bandwidth I actually have to engage with life. My reality is of a dysregulated headspace, everyday. And this series will offer you access into my life living with complex mental hea...
This episode is about a hard reframe: stepping back from the dream of marriage and family, not out of bitterness, but honesty. Instead, I am investing my energy where growth is actually possible (I hope). I talk about the grief that brings up for my inner child, the relief that comes with clarity of direction, and why focusing on career and purpose isn’t avoidance but a sign of maturity of the self. I discuss my nervous system limits (more on that soon), my mental health reality, and the cost...
A sunrise over Newcastle, a phone balanced in my car, and a decision to stop waiting for bloody perfection. In the next fortnightly check-in, I talk about the creative bottleneck that’s stalled a head full of episodes, how expectations kill momentum (again), and why pressing record is so important (as it uploading). It’s about choosing ANYTHING and focusing on consistency over polish, and naming the self-talk that gets in the way. That inner critic just won’t quit. I also share some good news...
What if your best ideas arrive amongst a wave of dysregulation and mania? This episode dives into that blurry space where genuine inspiration mixes with bipolar highs, BPD intensity and ADHD momentum. The hard work of figuring out what’s real before it costs you dearly. I share the checks I use when ideas start firing: grounded excitement, steady thinking, intact sleep, the 24-hour rule. I talk about the times I completely misread the moment, like the night I tried to “cure depression” ...
What happens when social anxiety crashes the recording session? Finally, I return to the mic after a short break, battling a new swallowing issue (anxiety?), performance nerves, and that familiar inner critic. It’s an honest look at showing up imperfectly and refusing to let anxiety call the shots. No way bucko! In this episode, I reflect on what’s been happening lately in my world: winning the University of Newcastle Young Alumni Award, two life-changing (and affirming) concerts (Oasis &...
Good days don’t last forever which is why they need to be used wisely. In this episode, I talk about using the times when mood, energy and motivation finally line up to take full advantage by being action-orientated and not just sitting back relaxing. How it's important to prepare for the eventual drop that's coming. Because it's true that as humans we have to endure both the good and the bad days. When my mood is elevated, I find even the most mundane of tasks bearable. Having the moti...
This episode looks at what happens when perfectionism gets in the way of creating anything at all. Over the past month, I've been stuck in the repetitive obsessive-cycle of record, doubt, delete, repeat. Each recording felt...off. And my inner critic made sure I knew about it. I talk through what it feels like, the hesitation before pressing record, the pressure to get it exactly right, and how easily the delete button stalled any progress I was making. Thankfully I am able to share the small...
**To watch both the audio and video from this webinar please follow https://youtu.be/4Lb1NzFK5XY?si=N6-pJuM1wPwMjqB_ ** Join Black Dog Institute’s clinical psychologist Pam Withey and lived experience advocate Elliot Waters as they explore how to support teen mental health during one of life’s most challenging stages. From recognising the signs of distress to building healthy habits around sleep, screen time and social connection, this webinar offers practical advice for parents, carers...
Finally I've published something. Not because this episode is one of my best (it isn't), but because I couldn’t stand being stuck in that record-delete loop any longer. After days of fighting perfectionism, imposter syndrome, and an overactive inner critic, I realised the only way to get beyond this loop is to publish something....anything! Fear of imperfection can paralyse creativity and curtail results, which is why releasing even a half-baked episode can be enough to get things rolling aga...
In this episode, I talk about the sudden re-emergence of my old foe, the inner critic, and how it’s teamed up with my perfectionism to drag me down. Together, they’ve convinced me that everything I do is sub-standard, fuelling insecurities and setting expectations that aren't reasonable or attainable. The best example of this? This very podcast of course! I’ve spent hours glued to my computer and microphone, desperately trying to record the “perfect” episode. The result has been exhaustion, f...
Follow my journey through the chaos of mental illness and the hard-fought lessons learned along the way. Lived experience is at the heart of this podcast — every episode told through my own lens, with raw honesty and zero filter. This is a genuine and vulnerable account of how multiple psychological disorders have shaped my past and continue to influence my future. -- Follow The Dysregulated Podcast: Instagram – @elliot.t.waters Facebook – The Dysregulated Podcast YouTube – The Dysregulat...
One missed appointment, that's all it took. And suddenly I was facing weeks without my ADHD medications. This time I’d done everything right, so for once this isn't on me! I had scripts sorted, appointments booked, all lined up, ready to go. Then my doctor went on unexpected leave, leaving me completely stimulant-free and flailing. The fallout was brutal: executive function collapsed, my car and room turned into chaos, appointments slipped, and even the podcast stopped for a bit there (sorry ...
After a break from therapy, today’s session was less about deep work and more about catching my therapist up on everything that’s been happening. Or, not been happening. She thought I'd be tapering off medications, instead of being on another one.. She seemed genuinely bemused by this, thankfully validating the confusion and frustration I have felt when my wishes aren't be listened to. She reminded me that this isn’t a failure of self-advocacy on my part, but rather a reflection of a broken s...
Follow my journey through the chaos of mental illness and the hard-fought lessons learned along the way. Lived experience is at the heart of this podcast — every episode told through my own lens, with raw honesty and zero filter. This is a genuine and vulnerable account of how multiple psychological disorders have shaped my past and continue to influence my future. -- Follow The Dysregulated Podcast: Instagram – @elliot.t.waters Facebook – The Dysregulated Podcast YouTube – The Dysregulat...
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