Claim OwnershipYou Are Not Crazy
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© 2026 You Are Not Crazy
Description
You’re exhausted from over-functioning. Always managing the chaos. Always trying to keep the peace.
You feel alone. Misunderstood. Like no one sees the full story—except you.
You question yourself constantly. You wonder if you’re the problem.
You’re not.
This podcast helps you understand emotional abuse, coercive control, narcissistic relationships, and trauma bonds—so you can stop doubting yourself and start trusting what you already know.
I’m Jessica Knight, emotional abuse coach and survivor. I help people make sense of confusing, destabilizing relationship dynamics—including gaslighting, manipulation, intermittent reinforcement, and post-separation abuse.
Here, you’ll learn to recognize the patterns of narcissistic abuse, understand the psychology of trauma bonding, and rebuild your sense of clarity, stability, and self-trust.
This podcast is especially for you if you are:
• Leaving or recovering from an emotionally abusive relationship
• Navigating divorce or post-separation coercive control
• Trying to co-parent with a high-conflict or manipulative partner
• Questioning your reality after gaslighting
• Rebuilding yourself after psychological abuse
You are not crazy. Your nervous system adapted to survive something real.
This is your space to understand what happened, reclaim your truth, and heal—on your terms.
🖤 Learn more and find resources at www.emotionalabusecoach.com
242 Episodes
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This episode puts words to what a trauma bond feels like before there is language for it. The quiet erosion. The logic loops. The way your needs slowly become “too much.” The way calm, rational explanations are used to invalidate your emotional reality. The way you start rehearsing conversations, monitoring your tone, silencing yourself, and shrinking—just to keep the peace. This is not a story about explosive fights or obvious cruelty. It is about subtle control, emotional superiority, and t...
Leaving a relationship with someone who has untreated borderline personality traits can feel less like a breakup and more like trying to escape a locked room while being told you’re the one causing the fire. In this episode, I speak directly to the people who are rarely centered in these conversations: the partners who have been living inside someone else’s emotional emergency. The ones who learned to scan tone, timing, silence, and mood shifts just to survive. The ones whose nervous systems ...
In this episode, I talk about what happens after the fight, the discard, or the emotional explosion, and why the aftermath hits you so much harder than it seems to hit them. I break down a pattern I see constantly in emotionally abusive, high-conflict, and narcissistic dynamics: one person unloads their rage, shame, blame, or dysregulation, and then walks away feeling lighter—while the other person is left carrying it. I explain why this isn’t about resolution, communication, or vulnerability...
How do you survive—and eventually recognize—the BPD cycle of abuse, especially when you are already exhausted, confused, and questioning yourself. In this episode, I break down the cycle as it actually unfolds in real life: The intense honeymoon phase, the sudden emotional whiplash, the accusations and character attacks, the breakups and reconciliations, and the long stretch of chaos that keeps you hooked through intermittent relief. I talk about why this dynamic is so hard to recognize while...
If you’ve ever been told you “can’t communicate” — especially by someone who constantly twists your words or refuses to take accountability — this episode will help you see what’s really happening. I break breaks down how abusers weaponize communication to destabilize you, create confusion, and control the narrative. You’ll learn why phrases like “you’re too blunt” or “you don’t make sense” are often not about clarity at all — they’re about power. You can view my courses here: https://j...
When you’ve been in an emotionally abusive relationship, the need for clarity can feel all-consuming. You want to know why they did what they did — why they lied, withdrew, or turned cold. You believe that if you can just understand their behavior, you’ll finally be able to find peace. Clarity from someone who manipulates and distorts reality rarely exists — at least not in the way survivors hope it will. The search for answers becomes part of the trap, keeping you focused on their motives in...
This episode unpacks what happens when speaking your truth gets twisted into a blame game. You finally name the pattern—gaslighting, neglect, constant eggshells—only to have the conversation hijacked. Suddenly you’re defending a mistake from years ago, a text tone, or an unrelated incident. Instead of accountability, you’re trapped in deflection, false equivalency, and emotional erasure. Jessica breaks down how this tactic shows up in everyday conversations, why it’s such a powerful tool of e...
In this episode, I talk about a communication pattern that so many people experience in emotionally abusive and high-conflict relationships—but rarely have language for. It’s the moment when a message sounds reasonable on paper, calm in tone, even “child-focused”… and yet your body reacts immediately. I walk through what’s happening when someone says all the right things while doing the opposite—hiding control behind concern, and contradiction behind “cooperation.” I use a real client example...
After leaving an abusive relationship, it’s common to find yourself stuck in an exhausting loop of self-doubt. You replay conversations. You question your memory. You wonder if you overreacted—or if maybe it wasn’t that bad. In this episode, I break down why second-guessing yourself after abuse isn’t a flaw—it’s a survival response. I talk about how abusers train you to distrust your own perceptions and why that confusion lingers even after you leave. I also share practical ways to start rebu...
This episode is about why everything feels harder, louder, and more urgent during the holidays when you’re navigating high-conflict divorce or co-parenting with a controlling or volatile person. Why situations that felt barely manageable in October suddenly feel explosive in December. Why your body feels like it’s bracing for impact every single day. And why so many parents reach a breaking point and say, “This can’t wait until January.” I break down what’s actually happening beneath the surf...
I unpack a viral TikTok that has been shared hundreds of thousands of times—and why its message is far more dangerous than it first appears. On the surface, the video presents itself as “relationship advice” about how women can keep men happy. In reality, it reinforces coercive control, sexual entitlement, and the idea that women are responsible for regulating men’s emotions, egos, and loyalty—often at the expense of their own boundaries, bodies, and well-being. I break down: How this type of...
In this episode, I’m sharing a simple end-of-year practice I’ve returned to every year since 2017—one that has nothing to do with resolutions, goals, or fixing yourself. It started in a yoga class on New Year’s Eve, during a time when my life was quietly falling apart. I was deeply depressed, circling the truth that I needed to leave my marriage, and trying to survive day to day. The exercise was simple: two cards. One for the year you’re leaving. One for the year you’re stepping into. Not ac...
This episode is not about fresh starts, resolutions, or manifesting a better year. It’s for the people who feel heavy, uneasy, or scared as the year changes. I’m sharing honestly about what the end of the year felt like for me when my life didn’t feel safe—when I was still inside emotionally abusive relationships, even though I didn’t have that language yet. I talk about the dread that replaced reflection, the exhaustion of constant self-editing, the panic attacks, the private crying, the way...
The holiday season has a way of revealing what we’ve been trying to ignore. When the pressure to perform, host, or appear “happy” collides with the chaos of an emotionally abusive relationship, everything that’s been buried rises to the surface. In this episode, I unpack why abuse patterns intensify around the holidays — and how to recognize the moment you finally see the cycle for what it is. I also share ways to start naming the truth, release self-blame, and reclaim your nervous system — e...
This episode explores what happens when the holidays don’t feel magical—when they instead trigger memories of tension, performance, and survival. I reflect on how November and December can awaken body memories of chaos, control, and grief, even years after leaving an abusive relationship. Lead to GoldThis is what wellness looks like in real life - no social media BS. ✨Listen on: Apple Podcasts Spotify Support the show *Please Note: there is a long intro that explains my services. If yo...
In this episode, I talk about one of the most confusing and insidious forms of manipulation survivors face in high-conflict relationships and co-parenting: Double Speak. It’s that moment when control hides behind concern — when an email, message, or conversation sounds calm and reasonable to everyone else, but your body knows something is off. It’s when someone says, “I just want what’s best for our child,” while taking positions that go directly against your child’s needs or the agreements a...
In today’s episode, we’re unpacking a phrase almost every survivor has heard at some point: “You’re the only one who has a problem with me.” It’s one of the most subtle yet powerful forms of emotional manipulation — the kind that makes you question your reality, your reactions, and even your goodness. When someone says this, they aren’t giving you perspective — they’re stripping you of credibility. They’re trying to convince you that your pain doesn’t matter unless other people agree wi...
Abusers often hide behind confusion — denying intent, twisting reality, and framing your hurt as an overreaction. What starts as a simple disagreement turns into you questioning your memory, your emotions, and your sanity. I share how this pattern plays out in everyday moments, from small promises broken to emotional gaslighting that keeps survivors trapped in cycles of guilt and self-doubt. If you’ve ever found yourself saying, “I don’t even know what’s real anymore,” this episode will...
This episode builds off of last weeks where I disussed DARVO in Family Court. I cover exactly how to capture DARVO behavior in a way that lawyers, GALs, and court professionals can actually understand. You’ll learn how to: Identify the denial, attack, and role reversal phases in real-time.Translate emotional chaos into factual, court-readable documentation.Recognize when the abuser is using the legal system as a weapon.Communicate patterns to your attorney without being dismissed or labeled “...
November is Family Court Awareness Month, a time to shed light on a system that too often fails to protect survivors and their children. In this episode, I explore what happens when a court system that frequently reframes abuse as “conflict,” rewards manipulation, and punishes protective parents for trying to keep their kids safe. I walk through: What Family Court Awareness Month is and why it matters.How the legal system can retraumatize survivors and reward abusers who appear calm, logical,...
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