Grief Grower

When someone asks, "How are you?" do you freeze, fumble, or fake a smile? In this episode, I share 20 ways to respond to that loaded question while grieving—sorted from most to least personal. You'll learn: How to protect your grief without hiding it When it's okay to say "I'm fine" Four types of responses for different social situations Why honesty isn't all-or-nothing in grief Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join me LIVE in LA (November) and Ohio (December): https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/events ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

You've probably heard the phrase "don't speak ill of the dead"—but what if the person who died hurt you? I'm breaking down how this common advice silences survivors, protects harmful legacies, and makes grief harder for people with complicated losses. You'll learn: Why "don't speak ill of the dead" is outdated, harmful advice How this phrase impacts survivors of abuse, estrangement, or neglect Three real examples of truth-telling obituaries and what they reveal What to say when someone tries to silence your grief Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join me LIVE in LA (November) and Ohio (December): https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/events ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

Grief isn't just heartbreaking—it's belief-shaping. After a major loss, many grieving people internalize painful stories like "I'm crazy," "I'm alone," and "My life will be like this forever." Understanding these beliefs (and what to say in response) can transform the way you show up and support the grieving people in your life. You'll hear: Where the 3 most common grief beliefs come from Why reassurance like "You're not alone" can backfire Three phrases that offer quiet, effective comfort How to support someone you care about without fixing, minimizing, or analyzing Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join me LIVE in LA (November) and Ohio (December): https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/events ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast  

What do you do when no one wants to talk about your loss—or hear your grief at all? In this episode, Susan Lieu, author of The Manicurist's Daughter, shares what it was like to grow up in a family where her mother's death was never acknowledged. Together, we explore: Why some families avoid talking about grief The long-term effects of unspoken loss How to process grief solo when support isn't available The healing power of creativity and storytelling Read The Manicurist's Daughter, subscribe to Susan's Substack "Live Like You're Mortal", and check out her foray into stand-up comedy: https://www.susanlieu.me/ Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join me LIVE in LA (November) and Ohio (December): https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/events ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

There are days when grief makes everything feel pointless—as if nothing will ever be good or meaningful again. If you've been there (or you're there now), this episode is for you. I'm sharing eight small but meaningful ways to keep going when everything feels impossibly heavy. These are the low-pressure, real-life practices I've used myself and taught inside Life After Loss Academy—not to fix grief, but to help you move through it. You'll hear: One mindset shift that can take the pressure off healing How to create a "Nope List" instead of a to-do list A defiant (and kind of hilarious) way to muster up hope Why noticing beauty can help you keep going The one word I use to soften catastrophic thoughts Watch my FREE workshop: Grow Through Grief:https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/free-workshop Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join me LIVE in Chicago (October) and LA (November): https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/events ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

Society tells us that achievements are supposed to feel good—so why do they sometimes leave you feeling unsettled, sad, or even disconnected? This episode explores gain grief—the hidden grief that lives beneath "positive" milestones like graduation, marriage, promotions, parenthood, and more. You'll learn: Why even "positive" transitions can be accompanied by real grief How to recognize gain grief in your own life Why naming hidden grief brings clarity, not heaviness How to honor what you're leaving behind, even if you're excited about what's next Ways to notice gains that may quietly exist within your losses Watch my FREE workshop: Grow Through Grief:https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/free-workshop Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join me LIVE in Chicago (October) and LA (November): https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/events ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

Not sure what to say to someone grieving during the holidays? These 12 simple text messages are a powerful way to show care, even when you're not sure what to say. You'll learn: How to avoid common clichés like "Let me know if you need anything" or "You have so much to be thankful for!" How to validate your friend's pain without trying to fix it How you can offer presence via text without pressure for your griever to respond How to gently remind them grief won't always feel this hard Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join me LIVE in Chicago (October) and LA (November): https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/events ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

Making a major choice after loss can feel impossible. Grief scrambles your brain and makes every option feel like the wrong one. I'll share some grounded tools to help you weigh options, consider best- and worst-case scenarios, and make compassionate choices you can trust. You'll learn: Why "don't make any major decisions for at least a year after loss" isn't always realistic Three practical ways to make big decisions while grieving How to ease fear of regret and find clarity in the fog of loss Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

What do you do with the dreams that come after loss? In this conversation with grief dreams expert Dr. Joshua Black, we talk about why grief shows up while we're sleeping, what these dreams might be trying to tell us, and how they can offer connection, clarity, and even comfort in the wake of death. Together we explore: The 3 types of grief dreams and how to recognize them How to invite a dream of your person (even if it hasn't happened yet) Why dream dictionaries can confuse more than clarify How to interpret grief dreams in personal, meaningful ways Pop culture examples of grief dreams in film, TV, and music Learn more about grief dreams, listen to the Grief Dreams Podcast, and join Joshua's grief dreams group: griefdreams.ca Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

"I'm sorry for your loss" is one of the most common phrases people say to grievers after a loss—but does it really help? I explore why it often falls flat and share what grieving people actually want to hear. You'll discover: Why we default to "I'm sorry for your loss" in the first place How this phrase can unintentionally feel empty or obligatory Real examples of how grievers experience these words What to say instead that brings comfort, connection, and care Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast  

Have you ever felt like you're grieving not just a loss, but grieving grief itself? In this episode, I introduce the term "meta grief"—the invisible sorrow that comes from being tired of grieving, worn down by ongoing tragedy, or overwhelmed by the endlessness of loss. If you've felt grief fatigue or wondered how long this will last, this episode is for you. You'll learn: What meta grief means and why I created the term How grief fatigue, burnout, and despair show up in everyday life Why it's normal to feel overwhelmed by ongoing personal or global loss The hidden grief of knowing there's always more grief to come How to cope when you're sick and tired of grieving Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving:https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

Sometimes grief is too big for plain language. I'm sharing six powerful grief metaphors—from the "Ball in the Box" to "grief butter" to my own "dressing room"—that give shape and words to what life after loss feels like. These images can help you explain your grief, validate your experience, and feel a little more understood. You'll hear: Why metaphors help make sense of overwhelming emotions 6 powerful metaphors for grief (and where they came from) How to use metaphors to share your experience with others Ways these images can validate your life after loss See the six grief metaphors in action on this week's blog: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/blog-archive/6-powerful-grief-metaphors-that-help-you-make-sense-of-life-after-loss Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving:https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

You don't need to be a therapist to support someone grieving. In this episode, discover why presence matters more than credentials and how to show up with confidence, even when you feel unqualified. You'll hear: Why "comforter imposter syndrome" is so common How grievers often find the deepest support outside therapy Three questions to ask to boost your comforter confidence Practical ways to offer care without overthinking it Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join Life After Loss Academy FREE for one month with code GRIEFGROWER: https://life-after-loss-academy.circle.so/checkout/life-after-loss-academy-membership?coupon_code=Griefgrower ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast  

What makes a "good death" for a beloved pet—and how do you grieve when society says, "It was just an animal"? Jana DeCristofaro of The Dougy Center joins me to explore pet grief, creating meaningful end-of-life rituals, and how to keep honoring your animal companion after they die. You'll hear: What a "good death" for a pet might look like Why pet grief can feel even bigger or more profound than human loss How to break the stigma of memorializing pets on social media Explore grief support and resources from Dougy Center: The National Grief Center for Grieving Children & Families: https://www.dougy.org/ Download Dougy Center's FREE 4-page guide for pet loss: https://www.dougy.org/assets/uploads/DoveLewis-Dougy-Center_After-the-death-of-a-companion-animal.pdf Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join Life After Loss Academy FREE for one month with code GRIEFGROWER: https://life-after-loss-academy.circle.so/checkout/life-after-loss-academy-membership?coupon_code=Griefgrower ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

Discover how Life After Loss Academy has transformed the lives of grieving people facing death, divorce, diagnosis, and other major life changes. I share five real student stories and the healing they experienced through live coaching, supportive community, and the GRIEF Method program. You'll hear: How Lori honored her daughter's memory while setting healthy boundaries Why Chris, a therapist, gained new tools to support both herself and her clients How Julia found stability and a grief-friendly workplace during the COVID-19 pandemic How Tammy embraced grief as a companion after divorce and empty nest How Kim rebuilt her identity after years of back-to-back loss Whether you're wondering if Life After Loss Academy is right for you or curious about whether this grief support program can truly work for you, these stories show what's possible when you have practical tools and a compassionate community. Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join Life After Loss Academy FREE for one month with code GRIEFGROWER: https://life-after-loss-academy.circle.so/checkout/life-after-loss-academy-membership?coupon_code=Griefgrower ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

When loss shatters your life, "rebuilding" can feel impossible—especially if it means leaving your person behind. But what if you don't have to "get over" your grief to move forward? I'll cover what rebuilding after loss really means, and how to carry your grief with you into a life that still holds peace, purpose, and joy. You'll learn: What rebuilding after loss actually looks and feels like Why the phrase "get over it" often causes more harm than healing A new way to think about grief as a lifelong companion How to rebuild your life without erasing the past Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join Life After Loss Academy FREE for one month with code GRIEFGROWER: https://life-after-loss-academy.circle.so/checkout/life-after-loss-academy-membership?coupon_code=Griefgrower ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

Friendship grief is one of the most overlooked and heartbreaking parts of loss. I'm talking about why friends pull away after death, divorce, or diagnosis—and what to do about it. You'll hear: What friendship grief is and why it hurts so much 3 toxic grief tropes to look out for in your friendships My 5-step framework for navigating hurtful relationships—while grieving! How to set new boundaries and rules for friendship after loss Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join Life After Loss Academy FREE for one month with code GRIEFGROWER: https://life-after-loss-academy.circle.so/checkout/life-after-loss-academy-membership?coupon_code=Griefgrower ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

How do you keep a loved one's memory alive after they die? In this episode, I share how to use a Signs + Symbols Library—a powerful tool that helps you feel connected to someone you've lost through your five senses. Whether you believe in signs from the afterlife or just want intentional ways to remember your person, this episode is for you. You'll hear about: How to use sensory memory to feel close to your person What to do if signs feel "made up" or like you're "faking it" Ideas for losses without direct memories (such as miscarriage or estrangement) Spiritual and non-spiritual approaches to staying connected to a loved one who died Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join Life After Loss Academy FREE for one month with code GRIEFGROWER: https://life-after-loss-academy.circle.so/checkout/life-after-loss-academy-membership?coupon_code=Griefgrower ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

What do you do when your own face reminds you—or others—of someone who died? In this conversation with Empower founder Cara Belvin, we talk about the surreal experience of resembling someone you've lost and how it shapes identity, memory, and the grief we carry. Together we explore: Why looking like someone who died can feel comforting—or complicated The emotional weight of being a "living reminder" to friends and family Why parent loss is SO life-changing The powerful role of mentorship in navigating early parent loss Become a mentor or volunteer with Empower—or get support for a grieving kid in your life: https://weareempower.org/ Join Life After Loss Academy FREE for one month with code GRIEFGROWER: https://life-after-loss-academy.circle.so/checkout/life-after-loss-academy-membership?coupon_code=Griefgrower Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast

Can you really let go of grief without letting go of love? These two powerful lists can help you release the pain of what can no longer be—while making space for what remains… and how you'd like to move forward. You'll learn: Why "letting go" doesn't mean forgetting How to grieve the person you used to be How to grieve you thought you'd have Simple rituals to help you release and heal Pre-order my new book, Of Course I'm Here Right Now: Three Actually Helpful Things to Say to Someone Grieving: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/of-course-im-here-right-now Join Life After Loss Academy FREE for one month with code GRIEFGROWER: https://life-after-loss-academy.circle.so/checkout/life-after-loss-academy-membership?coupon_code=Griefgrower ... Get FREE grief workshops, quizzes, and so much more on my website: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/links Keep Grief Grower ad-free by becoming a Patreon supporter: https://www.patreon.com/shelbyforsythia  Join my online course + community, Life After Loss Academy: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/life-after-loss-academy Listen to more episodes of Grief Grower, view episode transcripts, and submit a question for the show: https://www.shelbyforsythia.com/grief-grower-podcast