Claim OwnershipMy Delight with Sarah Bartel
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© 2026 My Delight with Sarah Bartel
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You are not broken!
The culture is broken. Your expectations may be skewed. But God designed your feminine sexuality to flourish in marriage if it is honored and nurtured appropriately.
This show is for Catholic women who want to know how to enjoy sex in marriage. This show helps you learn how to create a positive view of sexuality and your body in line with Catholic teaching and ALSO gain practical knowledge, tips, and scripts. If you want to know more about what it means to care for your unique, God-designed sexuality as women --so that you can thrive in your sex life in marriage and help change the culture--join in these honest, woman-centered conversations hosted by Sarah Bartel, moral theologian and Catholic sex + marriage coach.
“Sexuality is a source of joy and pleasure: The Creator himself ... established that in the genitive function, spouses should experience pleasure and enjoyment of body and spirit. Therefore, the spouses do nothing evil in seeking this pleasure and enjoyment.” -Catechism of the Catholic Church, 2362
42 Episodes
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When we fast, we can expect a pattern of five spiritual attacks--whether the fast is from food, behaviors like scrolling, people-pleasing, or other comforts. The enemy works in our false attachments: to things, to false gods, and to false comforts. He likes to get us to put something above God in our life, and that creates disorder. Fasting restores order. It puts God back as the center of our life. Of course the enemy will pursue our soul when we do this. Learn his tactics, learn that ...
It's almost Lent! Listen to the voice of the Lord speak: "I will lead her into the desert, and there I will speak to her heart." Hos 2:14 So many good Catholic married women feel like there's a desert of some kind in their love life. Maybe it's a libido desert, or a postpartum desert, or a menopause desert. Maybe it's the ache of not feeling as desired by your husband as you'd like. Maybe lovemaking just feels humdrum and routine So many different kinds of deserts! The scriptures can renew ou...
Making you feel guilty for saying "no." Wearing you down with asking over and over. You just want to get some sleep... the babies will be up at 5 am, so you just give in to get it over with. ...These are all examples of sexual coercion, which is a form of emotional abuse. Sarah is joined by Jenny DuBay, a certified trauma-informed Catholic coach, certified deconstructing gaslighting specialist, and certified narcissistic abuse specialist to talk about sexual coercion in marriage and the...
How does nutrition impact our hormones for libido and perimenopause thriving? Sarah is joined by Catholic nutritionist Rita Johnson of the Health and Hormones podcast to chat about how what you eat can impact your libido and perimenopause hormones. Along the way they chat about the power of dreaming, mindset shifts, and four high-protein breakfast ideas to anchor your blood sugar and set you up for a stable day... the kind of day more likely to leave with with some extra energy fo...
Ladies, this is your invitation from Sarah to join her on a "Daughters of Grace" Women's pilgrimage to France in May 2026! It's this May 4-13th, in the footsteps of St. Thérèse, her mama St. Zélie, St. Joan of Arc ("I was born to do this!"), and of course, all guided, inspired, and devoted to Our Lady. You'll pray at Notre Dame cathedral, the Chapel of the Miraculous Medal, Mont St. Michel where we'll seek the archangel's strength and protection, and culminate with a healing of hearts at Lour...
What should you wear as you climb into bed with your husband for a lovemaking night? Sarah invites you to consider: Wearing something that makes you feel good. 1. It might feel good in terms of comfort. It might feel cozy and comforting on your skin and keep you warm. 2. It might make you feel good because it looks good on you. It's your color. The cut and fit suit you and flatter you. That's another wonderful reason to wear something to bed! 3. It might make you feel good b...
What is a sex sabbatical? How do you know if you need one? What do you do during it, and how do you change up your dynamic afterwards? In this episode, Sarah shares how a sex sabbatical can be a helpful way to reset your love life in marriage. If you're in a cycle of obligation sex, forcing yourself to have painful sex, or just feeling burnt out, used, or resentful about sex in your marriage, a sex sabbatical can be just what a wife needs. It can give her the time to reflect on how she got to...
What does the Blessed Virgin Mary have to do with your love life as a Catholic wife? Is it even appropriate to turn to her for help in this area, seeing as she is a virgin--the Virgin of virgins, in fact? Yes! She is the passionate spouse of the Holy Spirit, and you do not need to be shy of asking her help with this intimate sanctuary of your marriage. -Mary is the perfect model of active receptivity. This concept can help you grow in your love life. Some women need to develop the "acti...
So many moms feel touched out by the end of the day and don't want their husband to touch them, especially not in lovemaking. How do you handle this? In this episode, Sarah shares 4 tips for handling that touched-out feeling that affects moms with young kids as well as other hands-on caregivers. 1. Set boundaries with your kids to save yourself from some of the unwanted touches throughout the day--for example, teach them not to tug at your clothes, if that drives you nuts. 2. Take...
Mary Bruno wrote Missing Pieces: Female Perspectives on Sex for Catholic Women in response to a lack of women's voices among the popular speakers and authors who are most well-known for bringing messages about theology of the body and Catholic teachings on sex and marriage. The theology and teachings are beautiful and true, but they implicitly assume that sex will be pleasurable. What if it's painful, as up to 75% of women will experience at some point in their lives? What if they...
How do you find time for sex when you'e a busy mom with young kids? First, Sarah shares three mindset shifts, plus a bonus note on attitudes about motherhood: 1. You NEED to make time for your marriage. You don't find it, you make it. You need to make time for emotional connection with your husband, and also for sex. Ideally, you want both of them together, but if you only have time for one, consider prioritizing emotional connection first. Consider scheduling it, and have an attitude that ac...
In this episode, Sarah welcomes special guest Nathan Bartel... her husband! Sarah asks Nathan about what led him to create his Holy Desires course for husbands. Along the way, they chat about: Philosophy (Nathan's Master's degree from CUA and his love of Aristotle)VirtueStruggles Husbands Face (mismatched libidos in marriage, not knowing how their wives' sexuality works, and finding the time amidst work and kids)Sex in Three Acts (Act I: Beforeplay + Foreplay, Act II: Intercourse, Act I...
If you're using NFP to avoid pregnancy (TTA), how can you thrive in your marriage with the abstinence period in your fertile window? How do you stay close? What sort of physical affection and touch is appropriate? (No genital stimulation for intentional arousal.) How can you harness the extra boost from the ovulation hormones to set yourself up for better lovemaking once you get the green light again? 🌸 🌸 Join me for the free Bloom in the Desert retreat: www.canafeast.com/desertbl...
Maybe you're a Catholic wife with sex struggles in your marriage, but you think, "Oh well, that's just how it is." In this episode, Sarah lays out five reasons why it's worth your bother to figure out how to make things better for you. 1. You're worth it. 2. Sex is the body language of the wedding vows, so learning how to communicate the messages of love in those vows well is important. 3. The practice of improving your experience of your love life can strengthen your marriage.&nb...
What about having sex during your period (as a married Catholic woman)? What are some things to think about? There are no moral prohibitions to this in the Catholic faith. Different NFP methods may have guidance around avoiding period sex if you're trying to avoid pregnancy. Some women may just avoid it because they assume it's yucky, but in this episode, Sarah challenges this thought. It is beautiful to be a woman, and having a period is part of the goodness of God's plan in creating women.&...
Are quick lovemaking sessions (less than 20-30 min or so) a good idea in your Catholic marriage, or not? In this episode, Sarah offers some cautionary and probing questions meant to identify if quickies are helping build your unity and connection or if they're reinforcing bad habits in your love life. She draws on quotes from Church documents to identify some principles to help you discern whether they're serving the highest goals of marriage. While the Catholic Church does not offer specific...
What gets you in the mood? That's an accelerator. What are you libido-killers? Those are your breaks. In this episode, Sarah describes common brakes and accelerators for women. She shares some ideas for how to learn what your own personal brakes and accelerators are, and suggests how you can use this knowledge in order to optimize your love life in your marriage. Resources mentioned in this episode. Come as You Are, Emily Nagoski (a book by a secular researcher on female sexuality0 "L...
How grave do your reasons need to be to use NFP to avoid pregancy? The precise language the Church uses in Humanae Vitae discussing the kinds of reasons legitimating using NFP actually refers to "just reasons," "serious reasons," or "well-grounded reasons." The phrase "grave reason" is a mistranslation which gives the misleading impression that you have to be practically on death's doorstep or so broke you're eating dirt in order to use NFP to avoid. In this episode, Sarah looks a...
Can you use NFP with a contraceptive mentality? Is this something to beware of? No. Sarah debunks the false worry that NFP users need to watch out for using NFP with a contraceptive mentality. She looks at the origin of the phrase in magisterial Catholic documents in its context to discover what the "contraceptive mentality" actually refers to, and points to additional references. References for This Episode: Magisterial Catholic Church Documents: Humanae vitae Familiaris consortio (198...
What is this idea of marital debt? Where is it in the Catechism, or in other official magisterial Church documents? (Hint: It's not actually there!) What does a belief in marital debt do to a married Catholic or Christian woman? In this episode, Sarah tackles marital debt head-on, debunking the idea that obligation sex for wives is the teaching of the Church. She shares quotes from official church teachings and looks to a common quote from the Supplement to the Summa (not actually written by ...
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