The Adulting With ADHD Podcast

People pleasing and rejection sensitivity are common struggles for adults with ADHD, especially in work and relationship settings where power dynamics and fear of disapproval are present. In this episode of Adulting with ADHD, Sarah talks with licensed therapist Billy Roberts, owner of Focused Mind ADHD Counseling, about why people pleasing develops and how it connects to rejection sensitive dysphoria (RSD), trauma responses, and self worth. Billy explains how many ADHD adults learn to manage fear of rejection by prioritizing others' needs, avoiding conflict, and taking on too much responsibility. While this can feel protective in the moment, it often leads to burnout, shame, and feeling disconnected from your own goals and identity. Together, they explore how people pleasing shows up in daily life, from over apologizing and over explaining to avoiding honesty and self advocacy. Billy also shares small, practical ways to begin shifting these patterns with more awareness and self trust. In this episode, we talk about: – Why people pleasing is common in adults with ADHD – How rejection sensitive dysphoria influences behavior – The "fawn response" and its role in relationships and work – Overcommitment, over responsibility, and over accommodation – Conflict avoidance and ADHD masking – How shame can make honesty feel unsafe Billy also shares practical strategies, including: – How to recognize when you are people pleasing – Ways to practice being more honest in low risk situations – Why self awareness is the first step toward change – How telling the truth builds confidence and agency – Why learning to trust yourself supports healthier communication If you often feel responsible for other people's emotions or afraid to speak up at work or in relationships, this episode offers a compassionate and realistic starting point for understanding why — and how to begin changing it. Resources mentioned: Focused Mind ADHD Counseling Billy Roberts' upcoming book on people pleasing and ADHD Adult ADHD therapy and coaching services

Rejection sensitivity and communication challenges at work are often misunderstood, especially for adults with ADHD. In this episode of Adulting with ADHD, Sarah talks with leadership coach and CEO of Collaborate Consulting, Trystan Reese, about how rejection sensitivity can affect workplace interactions and self advocacy. Trystan shares how understanding brain based differences can help people approach work challenges with greater clarity and confidence. Together, they explore why asking for support can feel difficult, how fear of negative feedback can influence behavior, and how small shifts in communication can improve workplace experiences for neurodivergent employees. This conversation offers a practical reframe: instead of focusing on what feels hard, we can focus on what helps communication feel clearer and more effective. In this episode, we talk about: What rejection sensitivity is and how it relates to ADHD Why feedback can feel challenging in professional settings How to think through possible outcomes before making requests The difference between emotional discomfort and real risk Why preparation and practice support better communication How to align requests with shared workplace goals Why body awareness and regulation can help before difficult conversations How self understanding supports self advocacy Trystan also shares practical tools and examples, including: A step by step approach for evaluating concerns Ways to request clearer expectations or meeting information Simple communication scripts for everyday situations Why practicing conversations can increase confidence How reframing internal narratives supports growth If workplace communication feels stressful or uncertain, this episode offers a supportive and realistic approach focused on clarity, preparation, and self trust rather than fear or perfection. Resources mentioned: Collaborate Consulting Trystan Reese coaching and training services Neurodivergent leadership and workplace inclusion programs  

Clutter is often treated like a motivation problem but what if it's really a systems problem? 🎙️ In this episode of Adulting with ADHD, Sarah sits down with ADHD and autistic decluttering specialist and podcast host Heather Tingle, founder of Untangled by Tingle, to explore how home organization, dopamine, and executive function are deeply connected for adults with ADHD. Heather shares how her own experience living in chaos led her to create decluttering methods that work with neurodivergent brains instead of against them. Together, they unpack why consistency can feel so hard with ADHD, how perfection based organizing systems create burnout, and how decluttering can become a source of safety rather than another area of pressure or shame. 💬 This conversation offers a compassionate reframe: instead of asking "Why can't I stay organized?" we can start asking "What makes my space easier to live in?" 🧩 In this episode, we talk about: ✨ Why traditional decluttering systems don't work for ADHD and autistic brains 👀 How dopamine and visibility affect motivation and follow through 🏁 Why finishing matters more than starting 🧠 How executive dysfunction impacts home organization 🎶 How competition, music, and time limits can increase momentum ❤️ Why emotional attachment matters more than logical rules 🪜 How small, bite sized tasks make decluttering more achievable 🛠️ Heather also shares practical strategies, including: ⏱️ How to "beat the kettle" or a song with a tiny decluttering task 📦 Why gathering similar items into one visible place helps ADHD brains 🤝 How body doubling and shared accountability reduce overwhelm 🎮 How turning decluttering into a game builds motivation 🌱 Why starting with the smallest possible step creates success 🗺️ How treating decluttering as a "side quest" lowers resistance 🌈 If clutter feels overwhelming, emotionally loaded, or impossible to maintain, this episode offers a gentler way forward one that centers dopamine, ease, and self compassion instead of perfection. 📚 Resources mentioned: 🎧 Decluttering Untangled podcast by Heather Tingle 🏡 Untangled by Tingle (professional decluttering services) 👥 Untangled by Tingle Declutter Community (Facebook group)

Stress, trauma, and nutrition are often treated like separate issues but what if they're all part of the same conversation? In this episode of Adulting with ADHD, Sarah sits down with licensed nutritionist and author Meg Bowman to explore how the nervous system and nutrition are deeply connected, especially for adults with ADHD. Meg shares how her own Crohn's diagnosis led her into the world of mental health nutrition, and why supporting the nervous system is just as important as choosing the "right" foods. Together, they unpack how stress and trauma shape the body's relationship with food, why consistency can feel extra hard with ADHD, and how nutrition can become a source of safety rather than another area of pressure or shame. This conversation offers a compassionate reframe: instead of asking "What should I be eating?", we can start asking "What helps my body feel safe enough to eat?" In this episode, we talk about: How the nervous system and digestion influence each other Why fear, stress, and trauma can shut down hunger cues What polyvagal theory has to do with food and regulation Why traditional nutrition advice often doesn't work for ADHD brains How visibility, simplicity, and support can make eating easier The idea of "taking care of future you" with low-effort planning How community and shared executive function can reduce decision fatigue Meg also shares insights from her book, This Is Your Body on Trauma, including: How trauma shows up in the body as inflammation Why chronic stress is linked to long-term health conditions A framework for understanding food, gut health, stress, and mental health together How to build a personal nutrition toolkit that feels supportive instead of restrictive If food feels complicated, overwhelming, or emotionally loaded, this episode offers a gentler way forward, one that centers safety, nervous system regulation, and self-compassion instead of perfection. Resources mentioned: This Is Your Body on Trauma by Meg Bowman Meg's Substack: Nutrition Needs Nuance Meg's website: megbowmannutrition.com  

Getting started can feel harder than the work itself—especially when your brain insists on finding the perfect system before you begin. In this episode of Adulting with ADHD, Sarah sits down with Russ Jones, host of the ADHD Big Brother Podcast, to explore what happens when we stop waiting for certainty and start jumping in sloppy instead. Russ shares his late-in-life ADHD diagnosis and how burnout, depression, and the isolation of the pandemic led him to rethink productivity from the inside out. Together, Sarah and Russ unpack why ADHD brains get stuck in planning mode, how perfectionism disguises itself as "research," and why starting imperfectly is often the most compassionate move we can make. This conversation is a grounding reminder that progress doesn't come from flawless systems—it comes from momentum, connection, and designing effort that your nervous system can actually tolerate. In this episode, we explore: Why ADHDers often over-plan instead of starting—and how to interrupt that cycle What "jumping in sloppy" really means (and what it doesn't) How finite effort and timers can reduce anxiety around overwhelming tasks Why quitting is sometimes part of getting started The concept of felt accountability and why other humans make follow-through more likely How community, body doubling, and shared effort reduce shame and isolation Reframing productivity as something we do together, not alone Russ also shares the heart behind his ADHD Big Brother approach—why guidance works better when it feels like support instead of authority, and how small, human-scale systems can help us finally tackle the tasks we've been avoiding. If you've ever told yourself, "I know me—this won't work," this episode gently challenges that belief and offers a more hopeful alternative: start where you are, start imperfectly, and don't do it alone. 🔗 Connect with Russ Jones Website: www.adhdbigbrother.com  

In this episode, I share a personal update, highlighting a shift in content based on audience feedback. I also tease a new resource set to debut in 2026 to meet listeners' needs more effectively.

Survey: https://forms.gle/8XHTKRNcnWGd9SQG8

In this episode, host Sarah is joined by Alexis Haselberger, a time management, productivity, and leadership coach. Alexis, who was diagnosed with ADHD through her work with clients, shares her journey from the high-pressure world of Silicon Valley startups to becoming a coach focused on sustainable success. The conversation explores crucial strategies for adults with ADHD, particularly in high-pressure environments, focusing on the power of self-compassion. Alexis discusses: Reframing Self-Criticism: Why kindness and celebrating small wins (even just putting on your shoes!) are essential for motivation, contrasting with the common belief that being harsh leads to improvement. Practical Workplace Boundaries: Implementing communication boundaries, like turning off notifications and using "away" messages, to protect mental health and maintain focus. The External Brain: The necessity of a trusted external task system (like alarms and reminders) to manage short-term memory issues and reduce anxiety. The Myth of "Doing It All": How accepting that you cannot "do it all" gives you agency over your life and time, making life about intentional trade-offs and effective prioritization rather than endless overwork. Tune in to learn how to leverage self-compassion to increase productivity and gain a sense of control over your life. 🔗 Resources Mentioned Adulting with ADHD Podcast Archives: patreon.com/adultingwithadhd Sponsor Offer (ADHD Online Assessment): Visit ADHDOnline.com and use promo code ADULTINGADHD40 to save $40. 🔗 Connect with Alexis Haselberger Website: www.alexishaselberger.com

Natalia Aza, a licensed therapist and co-founder of Kairos Wellness Collective, discusses the overlap between ADHD and OCD. Natalia shares her personal journey with ADHD and OCD, the importance of proper diagnosis, and the specific treatments for OCD. She highlights the challenges of misdiagnosis and discusses lesser-known OCD presentations that individuals with ADHD might overlook. Highlights Natalia's Journey with ADHD and OCD Understanding the Overlap Between ADHD and OCD Lesser-Known OCD Presentations in ADHD Steps to Take if You Suspect OCD Mentions kairoswellnesscollective.com adhdonline.com/adultingwithadhd

The Adulting With ADHD Podcast is evolving, and I want your voice in shaping what comes next. Your input is about to directly impact the direction I go. Ready? Here's the link to the super simple form: https://forms.gle/EnJx3RgxMFHf3juH6

In this episode, ADHD coach Christine Kotik shares her journey to becoming an ADHD coach, discusses the impact of burnout on adults with ADHD and provides actionable steps for managing time, productivity and emotional regulation. The conversation emphasizes the importance of creating supportive environments for neurodivergent employees and implementing strategies that benefit everyone in the workplace.   Highlights Understanding burnout in adults with ADHD The concept of the 'Me Hat' Supporting neurodivergent employees Mentions www.ckadhdcoach.com http://adhdonline.com/adultingwithadhd 📣 If you enjoy the show, please leave a review wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

In this episode, ADHD coach and therapist Megan D'Angelo shares her personal journey of being diagnosed with ADHD later in life. She discusses practical strategies to manage ADHD, navigate burnout, and maintain household routines, especially in neurodivergent families. Highlights Megan's Personal ADHD Journey The Role of ADHD Coaches Understanding Burnout in ADHD Strategies to Combat Burnout Managing a Neurodivergent Household Final Thoughts and Contact Information Mentions https://www.whateverworksadhd.com/ - Megan's ADHD coaching and consulting practice http://adhdonline.com/adultingwithadhd - Affordable mental health assessments 📣 If you enjoy the show, please leave a review wherever you listen to your podcasts. 

In this episode of the Adulting with ADHD podcast, host Sky Waterson, an ADHD strategist and founder of Unconventional Organization, shares her journey to an ADHD diagnosis during her PhD. She discusses common prioritization mistakes among ADHD individuals and introduces systems to help ADHD entrepreneurs focus and grow their businesses. Sky emphasizes the importance of personalized systems and the impact of the 80-20 rule in optimizing business operations for ADHD minds.  Highlights Skye's ADHD Diagnosis Journey Prioritization Challenges and Solutions ADHD Online Diagnostic Evaluation Effective Systems for ADHD Management The 80/20 Rule for ADHD Entrepreneurs Mentions http://adhdonline.com/adultingwithadhd https://instagram.com/unconventionalorganization

In this episode, Dr. Saara Haapanen, a performance scientist, ADHD coach and international speaker, discusses neurodivergent-friendly workplaces. She shares her journey into the field, emphasizing the importance of supporting ADHD individuals in the workplace. Dr. Haapanen explains her patented FUNK MS model that caters to the unique motivational needs of ADHD individuals, stressing the potential benefits for both employees and organizations.  Highlights Dr. Saara's Journey with ADHD Diagnosis and Coping Mechanisms ADHD in the Workplace Motivation Strategies for ADHD Challenges and Solutions for ADHD in Organizations Mentions drsaara.com — Dr. Saara's website  adhdonline.com/adultingwithADHD — ADHD Online diagnostic evaluation  

In this episode we are joined by Melissa Orlov, an award-winning author and expert on ADHD and marriage. Melissa shares her journey into the field, practical strategies for couples dealing with ADHD during times of economic volatility, and how to build resilience and maintain connection.  Highlights   Challenges for ADHD Couples During Tough Times Financial and Emotional Strategies for ADHD Couples Building Resilience and Connection Mentions adhdmarriage.com adhdonline.com/adultingwithadhd

In this episode, Cynthia Hammer, author of Living With Inattentive ADHD and executive director of the Inattentive ADHD Coalition, joins the show. Cynthia discusses her personal journey with ADHD, the importance of early diagnosis, and the challenges faced by individuals with inattentive ADHD. Find the ADHD Girls is the latest project of the Inattentive ADHD Coalition, focused on raising awareness and providing resources to help identify and support girls with ADHD, who are often underdiagnosed. Highlights Cynthia's ADHD Diagnosis Journey Founding the Inattentive ADHD Coalition Understanding Inattentive ADHD ADHD Online Diagnostic Evaluation Cynthia's Advocacy and Writing Journey Challenges of Late ADHD Diagnosis Advice for Parents and Women with ADHD   Mentions Find the ADHD Girls - findtheadhdgirls.org ADHD Online Assessment - https://adhdonline.com/adultingwithadhd/

Dr. Luke Smith walks us through how El Futuro, a nonprofit addressing Latino mental health care in North Carolina, advances culturally responsive ADHD support. He shares what culturally responsive care looks like, from philosophy to practice. Listeners gain insights into effective, culturally-attuned approaches for ADHD within a community-centered focus. Highlights How being understood culturally helps clients heal and thrive. Examples of holistic and lifestyle-based ADHD treatment. Examples of common hurdles and real-world nuances in navigating treatment options. Mentions El Futuro - https://elfuturo-nc.org ADHD Online Assessment: adhdonline.com/adultingwithadhd (use promo code ADULTINGADHD40 for $40 off)

This week we're joined by Avy Schondorf, a mom, entrepreneur and host of the AvyHD podcast, who shares her journey of self-discovery, entrepreneurship and building systems that work for neurodivergent minds.   Highlights: The concept of "invisible admin" The importance of shame-free support Practical strategies for managing life and business with ADHD Mentioned in This Episode patreon.com/adultingwithadhd adhdonline.com/adultingwithadhd (promo code: adultingadhd40) avyhd.com Avy on TikTok, Instagram, Facebook: @avhd

In this episode, RSD coach Jessica Summers explores Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria (RSD) and its impact on people with ADHD. The conversation covers what RSD is, how it affects individuals differently and effective tools and strategies for managing emotional dysregulation. The episode also touches on the importance of setting boundaries and learning to prioritize self-care.  Highlights Jessica 's own experience with RSD and how she got into this work RSD definied and its significance to sufferers Methods of treatment, including hypnosis and neurolinguistic programming Creating a sense of safety to facilitate learning and personal growth Mentions ADHD Online Assessment: adhdonline.com/adultingwithadhd (use promo code ADULTINGADHD40 for $40 off) Jessica's LinkedIn - https://www.linkedin.com/in/jessica-summers-hypnogenics Jessica's website - https://jessicasummershypnogenics.com Book - Surviving Family Gatherings and Social Events

Relationship coach and marriage and family therapy graduate Beaonca Ward helps high-functioning neurodivergent women - many with ADHD - overcome dating anxiety, find meaningful partnerships and have fulfilling sex lives. Tune in to discover Bianca's personal journey, the unique challenges neurodivergent women face in relationships, and practical strategies for building healthy, empowered connections. Highlights: The increased risks and unique challenges neurodivergent women face in intimate relationships How traits like novelty-seeking and loyalty can both help and hinder relationship choices for women with ADHD The importance of somatic body work and self-awareness in recognizing healthy versus toxic relationship dynamics Practical advice for overcoming dating anxiety The role of education in identifying red and green flags in relationships Mentioned: ADHD Online Assessment: adhdonline.com/adultingwithadhd (use promo code ADULTINGADHD40 for $40 off) Bianca's Instagram: @therealbeaonca Bianca's Website & Free Quiz: beaoncaward.com/quiz Enjoying the podcast? Support us and get exclusive content by joining our Patreon community! patreon.com/adultingwithadhd