No Parental Guidance

This week on No Parental Guidance, things get a little bit spicy as Hannah and Louise invite Ashley James on to help them clap back at some wild comments left on their Instagram. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week we’re joined by the brilliant Ashley James. TV presenter, DJ, author of Bimbo, mum of two and a fierce advocate for women rewriting the rules. From lockdown love stories to parenting reality checks, this episode is packed with honesty, humour and a few very relatable fails. Ashley takes us back to meeting her partner on Hinge, moving in just before the world shut down, and finding herself pregnant only months into a new relationship. She opens up about becoming a mum when she wasn’t even sure she liked kids and the resentment that crept in when her partner went back to work. We get into the double standards that follow women everywhere. The labels like nag, ball buster and frigid. The pressure to shrink yourself to be liked. The way dads get praised for changing a nappy while mums carry the mental load without applause. Ashley explains why she refuses to accept mum guilt until there’s a collective term for dad guilt. The conversation also dives into body image. From her Made in Chelsea days and chasing perfection, to battling adult acne, quitting Photoshop and the Victoria’s Secret show moment that changed everything. It’s a powerful reminder of how deeply women are conditioned to hate their bodies, and what it takes to unlearn that. Of course, there’s plenty of chaos too. Pregnancy bloating confessions. Breastfeeding myths that are not true. Postpartum sex realities. Finger puppets during lockdown when you used to be DJing festivals. School detention drama involving a pen running out and an accidental ChatGPT email fail. Playground slide mishaps. WhatsApp group disasters. Sparkly tutu outfits for nursery. The everyday madness of raising small humans. Ashley shares how she’s parenting differently, raising her children without outdated stereotypes, and learning to be calmer with milestones the second time around. It’s warm, witty and completely unfiltered. If you’ve ever felt overwhelmed, judged, exhausted, resentful, in love, proud and slightly feral all in the same day, this one is for you. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This bonus episode is packed with parenting fails, holiday drama, and the real-life chaos of raising kids while trying to survive your own sanity.Emily and the team dissect the chaos, the panic, and the heroic improvisation that followed, including dry tissues, emergency wipes, and a toddler completely unbothered by it all.From there, Emily opens up about her own parenting journey - breastfeeding struggles, formula guilt, pumping in stadiums, and all the messy, emotional, hilarious realities of motherhood. She’s refreshingly honest about feeling like a “failure” when in reality she was doing just fine, and she shares the lessons that helped her survive those early years without losing her mind.Then it’s onto kids, social media, and Snapchat disasters. From mortifying phone fails to accidental live streams and the awkwardness of trying to film content while wrangling children, Emily spills the funny and stressful moments that parents everywhere will recognise.The episode also touches on family holidays, sunbed wars, and what it really means to maintain calm while your kids, other guests, and random strangers push every button imaginable.Warm, witty, and completely unfiltered, this is the kind of parenting therapy session you’ll want to send to every mum or dad who’s surviving the small disasters and big embarrassments of family life.Subscribe: https://www.youtube.com/@NoParentalGuidance?sub_confirmation=1Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/no_parental_guidance/TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@noparentalguidancepodNo Parental Guidance is the unfiltered, laugh-out-loud parenting podcast that cuts through the impossible standards of Instagram parenting with honesty, chaos, and empathy. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, Hannah and Louise are joined by the queen of organisation herself, Emily Norris, for a deep dive into the "middle bit" of parenting, teenage hygiene, and the reality of raising three boys. From traumatic birth stories (including a broken tailbone!) to the "sextortion" talk and the chaos of sleep deprivation, nothing is off-limits. We’re also talking about the shift to senior school, the absolute black hole that is a teenage boy's appetite, and why Emily decided to go under the knife for a blepharoplasty. The episode kicks off with the usual chaos of term time as Hannah tries to find her calm while simultaneously losing every piece of school uniform in the house. The girls swap their most embarrassing sleep-deprivation fails—ranging from Hannah accidentally following a stranger into a bathroom to Louise buying baby gear in a haze she definitely shouldn't have been driving in. We also find out why Louise’s daughter is suddenly speaking Spanish and how an Irish teacher handled Hannah’s French GCSE. When Emily joins the chairs, she opens up about the shift from vlogging with a toddler to navigating life with teenagers. She shares the emotional journey of her own upbringing in a "shouty" household and how that fuelled her desire to create a secure, stable environment for her three sons, even if that means letting a pet snake into the house to maintain her "cool mum" status. From viral freezer dump bags to the reality of perimenopause and why she’s buying her Christmas cards in January, Emily proves why she is the internet's favourite organised mum. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on No Parental Guidance, Louise and Hannah are joined by the actual icon Sophie Ellis-Bextor. Pop star, kitchen disco queen, mum of five boys and proof that some people really can spin every plate without launching one directly at the wall. We obviously have to talk about the Saltburn moment. Sophie reveals how she got an email back in 2022 asking to use her song Murder on the Dance Floor, thought it was lovely, signed it off, and then only found out much later exactly what kind of naked, chaotic, slightly sinister dancing was going to happen to it. The way she describes it is so funny and so alarming, and honestly, once you’ve heard it you can never listen to that track the same way again. Sophie also gets properly real about the long game of parenting when you’ve got kids spanning nearly 15 years. She’s got one in his early 20s, two teens, and a youngest who’s just turned seven, and the dynamic is fascinating. She talks about the older sibling bond, how brothers tell each other things they will never tell you, and how weirdly emotional it can be watching relationships form in your house that have nothing to do with you. There’s also a brilliant chat about how parenting trends have changed over the years, from naughty step culture to the era of “I see your anger”, plus the absolute noise of school WhatsApp groups and how everything now arrives at the same level of urgency. One minute it’s an email, the next it’s block capitals, and suddenly you’re spiralling because your mum hasn’t replied and you’re convinced she’s actually dead. Then we get into identity and work, and Sophie is so refreshing about it. She talks about becoming a mum in her mid 20s and feeling like the world expected her to disappear into nappies and never be seen again. She opens up about how clunky it can feel at first, how the first baby knocked her sideways, and then how she actually found her flow the more kids she had. Including the casual reveal that she once recorded a vocal while feeding a baby, which is either iconic or witchcraft. Before Sophie joins, Hannah and Louise are in full mum mode too. There’s a very honest rant about how most of parenting is just being asked to locate items from the third shelf down on the left. Plus the classic moment where your kid says “Mummy” and you brace for a crisis, sprint in like someone’s about to lose a limb, and they just want to show you their game score. Which somehow they interpret as you being thrilled, so they keep doing it forever. Warm, hilarious, surprisingly emotional in places, and full of the kind of chaos that makes you feel less alone, this one is such a good listen. Subscribe: https://www.youtube.com/@NoParentalGuidance?sub_confirmation=1 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/no_parental_guidance/ TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@noparentalguidancepod Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on No Parental Guidance, Louise and Hannah are back with another proper parenting therapy session, joined by Hilary Whitehall for a bonus episode that swings from absolute maternity ward chaos to the kind of advice you actually want to hear at 3 a.m. It kicks off with a listener story so mad it sounds fake: they’d just given birth when the ceiling collapsed from the room above and they were stuck in the labour room for five hours while it was cleaned up. Hilary talks through how she’d handle it as a doula, and why sometimes all you can do is stay calm, focus on the baby, and use humour because you literally cannot fix the chaos around you. From there it turns into a very real chat about being in the trenches. Half term dread, kids needing to be “run like dogs”, and how to survive a week off without losing your mind. Hilary shares genuinely useful ideas that don’t require you to be a Pinterest mum, plus a couple of low-effort wins like water painting with a brush and a bucket that keeps them busy without destroying your house. There’s also a relatable detour into teenage boys and food, the snack hiding places they always find, and the way grown-up kids still walk into your house and go straight to the fridge like they own the place. But the heart of the episode is Hilary’s advice for exhausted mums who feel like it’s never-ending. Her message is simple, comforting, and honestly a bit emotional: you are doing a great job, make a cup of tea, take a breath, ask for help, and aim to be a “good enough mother” not some impossible perfect version. There’s also a brilliant chat about taking guilt out of breastfeeding and why a flourishing baby matters more than anyone’s opinions. Warm, funny, and properly reassuring. This is the one you’ll want to send to a mate who’s just had a baby and is spiralling at night. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on No Parental Guidance, Louise and Hannah are joined by Hilary Whitehall actress, podcaster, former doula, long-time wife of Michael, mum to Jack, Molly and Barnaby and now a grandmother with another grandchild on the way! Hilary is absolutely hilarious and delivers one of the most jaw-dropping birth stories we’ve ever heard, involving a very famous godfather, a hospital mix-up and black tie attire. Honestly, you couldn’t write it! Hilary also opens up about her decade working as a doula and what new mums really need in those first overwhelming weeks, from building confidence to cutting through guilt and panic. Plus, she talks about becoming a grandmother and why looking after someone else’s kids hits differently... especially when scooters are involved. And just when you think it can’t get any wilder, Hilary shares one of her worst parenting moments: accidentally running over her toddler in France and the horrifying second where she thought she’d killed him. Before Hilary joins, Hannah and Louise are in full chaos mode. Hannah forgets an inset day and sends her son to a locked school, then her daughter gets hold of her phone and accidentally messages the entire class WhatsApp. Louise shares a post-op Christmas horror story featuring a catheter, a night bag, and a husband who trips, falls, and sets off total mayhem in the middle of the night. There’s also a very honest chat about kids growing up and the moment the awkward questions start coming thick and fast, plus Hilary’s take on raising polite kids, being a “bossy grandmother”, and the slightly genius trick she used to get her kids to bed early. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How much do you really know about what happens in the delivery suite? Louise and Hannah put parents-to-be Sam and Alice to the test with a quick-fire “Parent Prep Check", and it instantly descends into hilarious chaos. From the dreaded question “what is the plug?” (spoiler: it’s not a bath plug…) to crowning, meconium, and the mysterious fishing net in the midwife’s suite; the quiz is equal parts educational and unhinged. There’s plenty of “why did nobody tell me this?” parenting reality too: the waxy newborn coating (vernix) and why it matters, the bodily surprises babies can arrive with, and the kind of facts that make you laugh and squirm at the same time. Sam’s book-reading finally pays off… while Alice realises she might want to revise. If you’re pregnant, trying for a baby, or just love a brutally honest parenting chat, this bonus ep is a perfect bite-sized watch - ridiculous, real, and somehow genuinely useful. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week on No Parental Guidance, Louise and Hannah are joined by Sam and Alice Vanderpump - reality TV meets real-life parenting prep as the couple open up about expecting their first baby (a boy!) and what they’re actually feeling at 35 weeks pregnant. Sam and Alice talk morning sickness that’s never really left, multiple hospital visits, and the reality of going into parenthood with “no idea what’s coming.” They share the story behind their baby name Marmaduke - including the emotional family reason it means so much, and laugh through the chaos of being last-minute parents-to-be (hospital bags un-packed… and somehow the plan still includes white silk pyjamas). But it’s not all jokes: Sam speaks openly about being on the liver transplant waiting list, and the conversation turns into a powerful and very important message about organ donation, and why telling your family your wishes matters more than people realise. Before Sam and Alice join, Hannah and Louise are deep in the trenches: Hannah arrives running on fumes after a brutal night of toddler vomiting (eight towels later…), and Louise confesses a truly elite packed-lunch fail after discovering that chutney and strawberry jam look identical when you’re moving too fast. Hilarious, honest, and unexpectedly moving; this episode is for anyone who’s ever been exhausted, overwhelmed, and trying to laugh through the chaos... join us. NHS Organ Donation - official UK organ donation website: https://www.organdonation.nhs.uk/ Register your decision on the NHS Organ Donor Register: https://www.organdonation.nhs.uk/register-your-decision/ This episode is proudly sponsor. January is the perfect time to get that summer glow booked in! Whether you’re looking for a family-friendly villa or a luxury escape, check out Jet2Holidays to find your perfect 2026 getaway Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week, we are joined by Made in Chelsea royalty turned business mogul and vegan mum, Lucy Watson! Lucy gets incredibly honest about her journey into motherhood, from the dramatic birth of her son to the reality of breastfeeding for 14 months. Lucy opens up about her intense birth experience, revealing that she had to be induced because the cord was wrapped around her son’s neck and shoulders. After 18 hours of labour, she shares the moment she realised she couldn't go any further and had to transition to an emergency C-section. We talk about the immense respect we have for our bodies and the pressure we put on ourselves during birth. From feeling "so shy" to feed in public to the reality of being left exposed when a baby suddenly pops off, Lucy doesn't hold back. She describes the breastfeeding struggle and why she felt judged for continuing to nurse until 14 months. Lucy reflects on her time on Made in Chelsea, explaining why she ultimately chose to leave the show to protect her relationship with James. She talks about the "fiery" persona the show enhanced and how her identity has shifted now that she’s a mum who misses her son the second he goes to bed. Obviously we discuss raising a vegan baby, dealing with "meltdowns," and the "fail/win" of finally giving in to screen time to survive a car journey. Plus, Hannah and Louise share their own wins and fails of the week, including a very awkward call from school about a "smacking" incident! This episode is proudly sponsor. January is the perfect time to get that summer glow booked in! Whether you’re looking for a family-friendly villa or a luxury escape, check out Jet2Holidays to find your perfect 2026 getaway. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week Louise and Hannah are joined by the wonderful Ryan and Matthew, better known as Daddies Overnight. They open up about their beautiful, yet challenging, journey to adopting their son and what it’s like navigating the world as two dads. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The one and only Charlotte Dawson joins us for an episode that is equal parts hilarious chaos and heart-wrenching honesty. Charlotte doesn't hold back as she opens up about the "four years of hell" she endured being targeted by trolls, leading to constant calls from social services and even police involvement. She shares the reality of being accused of child abuse while simply trying to navigate motherhood in the public eye and why, despite the noise, she remains unapologetically herself. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We’ve made it! Welcome to our final hurrah of 2025! It feels like only yesterday we were nervously launching this podcast in July, and now, over 20 episodes later, we are celebrating a massive milestone. We are so incredibly grateful to everyone who has tuned in every week and shared this journey with us. To celebrate, we’ve put together a special trip down memory lane. This is a compilation of our 12 favourite moments from the first six months of No Parental Guidance. From the hilariously relatable fails to the deeply emotional stories from our incredible guests that truly stuck with us. In this "Best of 2025" special, you'll hear from Angela Scanlon talk about her Strictly pelvic floor mishap. Konnie Huq on the reality of leaking boobs at the BAFTAs, to Trinny Woodall on her journey to motherhood with 16 rounds of IVF. We also have big news for 2026! We’re having a glow-Up. We’re getting a brand-new studio, and expanding the show in ways we can’t wait to share with you! Thank you for being part of the No Parental Guidance family this year. Grab a final mince pie, settle in, and let’s relive the best of 2025! Thank you for tuning in! Don't forget to like, subscribe, and share with a friend! Subscribe: https://www.youtube.com/@NoParentalGuidance?sub_confirmation=1 Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/no_parental_guidance/?hl=en TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@noparentalguidancepod?lang=en Catch Hannah Live on Tour! Hannah kicks off her tour next year! You can find tickets and dates for her incredible show here: https://www.hannaheast.com/comedy/ No Parental Guidance — the unfiltered, laugh-out-loud parenting podcast that’s the antidote to the impossibly perfect world of Instagram parenting. Every week, our hosts share their own "parenting fail of the week" before being joined by a celebrity guest who spills the tea on their own parenting fails, the support they have to help through the chaos, and reveals the real stories behind those perfectly curated social media snaps. From giggles to honest confessions, this is a parenting podcast for those who love their kids but also love to keep it real. #Parenting #podcast #NoParentalGuidance #Podcast #Divorce #CoParenting Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas!  In this very special festive episode, Hannah and Louise are joined by a true national treasure—Larry Lamb. Known for his iconic roles in Gavin & Stacey and EastEnders, Larry sits down with us to talk about the "gift of parenthood," the reality of being a "boomer," and what Christmas really looks like in his household (spoiler: it involves a lot of napping!). In this episode, Larry Lamb opens up about the magic of the Gavin and Stacey Christmas specials and playing the iconic Mick Shipman. He also gets incredibly raw about his parents' separation, his mother running away with his brother, and how being "badly fathered" shaped the man he is today. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Join us for a powerful and honest conversation with the incredible Chloe Madeley, daughter of TV legends Richard and Judy, as she opens up about one of the most stressful periods of her life: her divorce. Hannah and Louise kick off with a classic overshare. Louise recounts the moment she went to the doctor after feeling sick post-Reading Festival, only to be hit with a 10-week pregnancy shock! They also laugh about modern kids' slang, from being called "Bruh" to hearing their children use the word "Capping." Chloe shares the real, raw impact of her separation, the moment she knew she had to end the marriage for her family, and the unexpected positives of co-parenting her daughter, Bodhi. She gets candid about the Cat 2 Emergency C-Section, her journey through motherhood, and sends a huge Shout Out to Single Mothers everywhere. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We are back with another chaotic episode packed with your most hilarious and mortifying listener Parenting Fails! But first, we dive straight into the wild world of pregnancy libido and why one friend's horniness led to a seriously awkward emergency call. Louise kicks off the episode by sharing her friend's incredible confession. while heavily pregnant and "feeling frisky" at home, an FBI warning scam flashed up on her screen. In her hormonal state, she panicked and called 999. We discuss the reality of being horny in pregnancy! We talk about "Chore Play," and how a husband's behaviour around the house can be the ultimate turn-on…or maybe they're just hoping for some "rudies"! We also wonder whether lying with your legs in the air actually works if you are trying to get pregnant. Get ready for some pure chaos, including a potty training disaster in a supermarket, a hot tub fail, and a midwife’s shock in the labour room. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

For the first time in her life, Trinny Woodall opens up about years of IVF treatment in this week's episode of No Parental Guidance. She reveals that her miracle baby came after 16 rounds of IVF treatment. And when her daughter arrived, she came 6 weeks early and was born with a condition called Talipes which required specialist treatment for several years. Trinny talks us through those first tender years of her baby's life, from the complete joy of becoming a mother, and the challenging specialist treatment that allowed her daughter to learn to walk. Links if you need support https://www.miscarriageassociation.org.uk/ https://fertilitynetworkuk.org/ https://www.britishfertilitysociety.org.uk/information-hub/emotional-support-for-fertility-problems/ https://www.cruse.org.uk/get-support/local-services/ https://www.mind.org.uk/information-support/guides-to-support-and-services/bereavement/support-and-self-care/ https://www.scope.org.uk/about-us https://talktofrank.com/get-help/find-support-near-you Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We're back with your favorite segment: Parenting Fails! But first, Louise and Hannah tackle the ridiculous conveyor belt of personal questions every woman faces, starting in her twenties: When are you getting a boyfriend? Married? Kids? And ultimately, When are you getting divorced? :woman-facepalming:This leads to Hannah's hilarious confession about her husband, who referred to her as his "current wife" as if he's planning on trading up later! Who else would love to hear their husbands on the podcast to explain themselves?We also dive into the gender reveal pressure. The girls discuss the constant, awkward questions mums of two boys get when trying for a third: "Are you hoping it's a girl?" and the pressure that comes with it.Louise relives the early days of sleep deprivation chaos, sharing the mortifying moment she was so tired she accidentally said "I love you" to a delivery driver!We read out listener stories that prove we're all a mess! Get ready for tales of swimming pool accidents, sending deeply wrong messages to the school WhatsApp group, and the inevitable disaster of having your boobs out to the neighbours.Tune in for the unfiltered truths and laughs you need to get through the week! Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The brilliant social media stars The Kabs Family (Chan and Tay) join Louise and Hannah to talk about their journey to baby number four, the pressures of modern parenting, and how they went from nervous teenagers on a bus to YouTube superstars! Tay confesses he had to do a full presentation to convince Chan to have a fourth child, and now he's waiting on her hand and foot. From getting her McDonald's deliveries to being her "acts of service" love language. The conversation quickly turns to the infamous Push Present; Chan has been dropping heavy hints, but Tay genuinely doesn't know what this trendy social media custom is! We dive into the chaos of family life, including the incredible story of how they met: Tay, nervous in Year 7, had to get his friend to speak to Chan's friend just to get her number after seeing her on the bus and they've been together ever since! Now, with kids aged 16, 8, and 6, they're preparing to go back to the newborn stage. Chan opens up about the difficulty of her pregnancies (always being sick and nauseous) and the anxiety that comes with being considered a "geriatric mum" by the hospital. Plus, you'll hearTay confessing his ultimate parenting fail: completely forgetting his newborn son when leaving the house, spoiling teenage daughters, and toddler tantrums Meanwhile, Louise and Hannah tackle their own chaos: Louise's arachnophobia coming back with a vengeance over a tiny Lego spider, and Hannah's humiliating moment when her daughter had a tantrum and kept loudly asking for a "dick" (stick) in public! Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/no_parental_guidance/?hl=en TikTok: https://www.tiktok.com/@noparentalguidancepod?lang=en No Parental Guidance—the unfiltered, laugh-out-loud parenting podcast that’s the antidote to the impossibly perfect world of Instagram parenting. Hosted by the brilliantly funny Louise Boyce and Hannah East, No Parental Guidance is a safe space for real mums to talk openly and hilariously about the chaos, guilt, and of course joys of parenthood. From giggles to honest confessions, this is a parenting podcast for those who love their kids but also love to keep it real. Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

If you've ever felt like getting your kid into an after-school club is harder than buying Oasis concert tickets, this episode is for you! Louise and Hannah dive deep into the most chaotic parts of parenting, starting with the logistical nightmare of securing club spaces before they instantly fill up.  We confess to the difficulty of running children to all their activities only to fall asleep at music recitals and wonder how long we have to pretend the violin doesn't sound like nails down a blackboard. We get honest about the pressure to give our kids the best start, even knowing that only 0.04% of kids become professionals at their hobby.  The chaos doesn't stop there: we share stories of kids with no filter, like Louise's daughter asking a man if he was having a baby because he was "just fat," and the unbelievable tale of a three-year-old slapping a woman's bum in public.  The shock continues as Hannah recounts her traumatic chicken pox nightmare while on holiday, which ended with her son being escorted off the plane on the way home.  We also share a mortifying listener fail about a child walking in on parents having "quiet time,"  Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices