Love Each Other Better

In this special episode, I sat down with John Kinyon, a close friend of Marshall Rosenberg, the founder of Nonviolent Communication (NVC). Join us as we explore some of the insights John learned directly from Marshall, along with what has inspired him most about other teachers of his, including Carl Rogers (cofounder of Humanistic Psychology) and Dick Schwartz (founder of Internal Family Systems (IFS)). Our conversation delves into the spiritual dimensions of NVC, the nuances of empathy, and how NVC is so much more than a communication and mediation tool. Perfect for anyone interested in deepening their understanding of NVC — both its roots and its potential. About my guest: John Kinyon is an internationally recognized mediator and trainer of his Mediate Your Life (MYL) approach. For over 25 years he has mediated conflicts and developed and delivered the MYL training throughout the U.S. and in countries around the world in Europe, Asia, and Australia. He is a certified trainer of the Center for Nonviolent Communication, and worked closely for over a decade with NVC creator/founder Marshall Rosenberg. CONNECT WITH MY GUEST, JOHN KINYON: John's website: https://www.johnkinyon.com Mediate Your Life Trainings: https://johnkinyon.com/trainings/ Email John: [email protected] CONNECT WITH YOUR HOST, ALI MILLER: Book a free 45-minute call: https://www.calendly.com/alimillercoaching/45 NVC Training + Coaching Check out my updated Love Each Other Better Private Programs: The Essentials + The Deep Dive: https://www.AliMillerCoaching.com/privateprograms Free Resources Feelings & Needs Cheatsheets: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Free Mini-Course: The 4 Steps to Stop Any Fight Without Giving In https://www.alimillercoaching.com/freeminicourse Connect with Ali Instagram: @alimillercoaching Free Private Facebook Group: NVC for Couples https://www.facebook.com/groups/nvcforcouples Email: [email protected] Website: https://www.alimillercoaching.com

Blame doesn't always sound like blame. In this episode, we'll look at the top three subtle ways it shows up in your relationship without you realizing it, why it keeps you and your partner stuck in fight mode, and what to do about it...so you can get out of fight mode and get on with doing what you do best: loving each other.    Connect with your host, Ali Miller: Book a free 45-minute call: https://www.calendly.com/alimillercoaching/45 NVC Training + Coaching Check out my updated Love Each Other Better Private Programs: The Essentials + The Deep Dive: https://www.AliMillerCoaching.com/privateprograms Free Resources Feelings & Needs Cheatsheets: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Free Mini-Course: The 4 Steps to Stop Any Fight Without Giving In https://www.alimillercoaching.com/freeminicourse Connect with Ali Instagram: @alimillercoaching Free Private Facebook Group: NVC for Couples https://www.facebook.com/groups/nvcforcouples Email: [email protected] Website: https://www.alimillercoaching.com

When you and your partner clash over parenting—too harsh, too permissive, wrong boundaries, wrong tone—it can quickly turn into disconnection, defensiveness, and a painful battle to prove who's right. In this episode, I share how Nonviolent Communication can help you move beneath parenting "strategies" to the real drivers: the feelings, needs, and values both of you are trying to protect. You'll learn the three core NVC skills (self-empathy, empathy, and self-expression), the four-step framework (observation, feeling, need, request), and how to have connecting and productive conversations about parenting instead of it turning into yet another argument. Learn how to stay connected to each other even when you disagree about something so important.  Connect with your host, Ali Miller: NVC Training + Coaching Check out my updated Love Each Other Better Private Programs: The Essentials + The Deep Dive: https://www.AliMillerCoaching.com/privateprograms Free Resources Feelings & Needs Cheatsheets: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Free Mini-Course: The 4 Steps to Stop Any Fight Without Giving In https://www.alimillercoaching.com/freeminicourse Connect with Ali Instagram: @alimillercoaching Free Private Facebook Group: NVC for Couples https://www.facebook.com/groups/nvcforcouples Email: [email protected] Website: https://www.alimillercoaching.com

There's a powerful question I come back to again and again in my own relationships and in my work with couples because it is the single most effective way to transform conflict into connection: "What need is this person trying to meet?" In this episode, I explore why I believe this inquiry is THE most impactful shift we can make when we want someone to change their behavior. While NVC is often taught as a set of communication skills, its truly transformative power lies in the way it changes how we see ourselves and others. We'll look at why understanding the needs underneath behavior can help us move beyond blame, reduce defensiveness, and create more productive conversations — even when we strongly disagree. I'll also address a common misconception: that understanding someone's needs means excusing their behavior. If you've ever found yourself frustrated with your partner's behavior or discouraged that the same conflicts keep repeating, this episode will help you address your relationship struggles in a clearer, more compassionate, and way more effective way.    Connect with your host, Ali Miller: NVC Training + Coaching Check out my updated Love Each Other Better Private Programs: The Essentials + The Deep Dive: https://www.AliMillerCoaching.com/privateprograms Free Resources Feelings & Needs Cheatsheets: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Free Mini-Course: The 4 Steps to Stop Any Fight Without Giving In https://www.alimillercoaching.com/freeminicourse Connect with Ali Instagram: @alimillercoaching Free Private Facebook Group: NVC for Couples https://www.facebook.com/groups/nvcforcouples Email: [email protected] Website: https://www.alimillercoaching.com

What if one of the most powerful relationship skills could be learned from a kindergartner? In this episode, I share a story about my daughter that sparked a reminder we all need: when someone we love is struggling, they often need our presence more than our solutions. I explore why we instinctively jump into "fix-it mode," how that can create disconnection, and what to do instead. You'll learn a simple Nonviolent Communication (NVC) practice that can help turn conflict into deeper understanding and connection. If you've ever felt frustrated when your attempts to help don't land, this episode is for you. Connect with your host, Ali Miller: NVC Training + Coaching Check out my updated Love Each Other Better Private Programs: The Essentials + The Deep Dive: https://www.AliMillerCoaching.com/privateprograms Free Resources Feelings & Needs Cheatsheets: https://www.alimillercoaching.com/feelingsandneeds Free Mini-Course: The 4 Steps to Stop Any Fight Without Giving In https://www.alimillercoaching.com/freeminicourse Connect with Ali Instagram: @alimillercoaching Free Private Facebook Group: NVC for Couples https://www.facebook.com/groups/nvcforcouples Email: [email protected] Website: https://www.alimillercoaching.com