Narcissist Apocalypse: Patterns of Abuse

In this re-release episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Brandon and his old pal Melissa listen to unsent 'Letters To My Narcissist' that they received from a handful of courageous narcissistic abuse survivors. It's an emotional roller coaster of an episode that will make you laugh and cry, with some goosebumps in between. Prepare to be impacted.  CONTENT WARNING - Some letters discuss sexual assault and child abuse Click if you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title to read about Self Gaslighting & Why You Doubt Your RealitySign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, we break down how gaslighting turns inward, becoming self-gaslighting that dismantles a person’s sense of reality and self-worth. We explore how survivors go from trusting their instincts to doubting their emotions, questioning their memories, minimizing harm, and assuming fault automatically — even after the abusive dynamic ends.This conversation connects gaslighting to identity erosion, self-blame, memory doubt, survival mode, and people-pleasing — and explains why self-gaslighting isn’t weakness, but a learned survival response.If you’ve ever wondered how you lost trust in yourself, this episode puts language to that process — and shows where clarity begins.Click if you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title to read about Self Gaslighting & Why You Doubt Your RealitySign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this educational episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, we break down the patterns of coercive control present in Mackenzie’s survivor story and explore how abuse can exist without physical violence or visible injuries. Using Mackenzie’s experience as a framework, we examine how control develops gradually, how trust and autonomy are eroded over time, and why coercive control is often difficult to recognize while you’re living inside it.This episode focuses on how manipulation hides behind care, how boundaries are subtly overridden, and how self-doubt is cultivated until survivors begin questioning their own instincts and perceptions. We also explore the role of fear, obligation, guilt, and shame in maintaining control, and why leaving or resisting is far more complex than outsiders often assume.Click if you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title to read about Coercive Control as Care: Signs & PatternsSign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Brandon speaks with Mackenzie, a survivor of nearly 27 years of coercive control and emotional abuse within her marriage.What began in high school as devotion and care slowly became a war fought quietly at home—marked by fear, obligation, guilt, and the constant management of another person’s moods. Mackenzie describes how control tightened over time through emotional manipulation, financial power imbalances, isolation, and escalating volatility, leaving her and her children living in survival mode.She shares what it was like to walk on eggshells, normalize harmful behavior, and carry the shame of staying, while trying to protect her family and maintain the appearance of normalcy. As her children grew older, the abuse intensified, revealing how deeply coercive control impacts not just partners, but entire households.Mackenzie reflects on the moment clarity arrived—not through sudden strength, but through distance, validation, and reclaiming trust in herself. This episode offers an honest look at why survivors stay, how psychological wars are fought quietly at home, and what healing can look like after endurance finally ends.It's a story of isolation, love bombing, victimhood, obligation, coercive control, guilt, double standards, future faking, fear, emotional and verbal abuse, survival mode, hospital heroism, rage, suicidal ideation, financial manipulation, self-doubt, suppressed anger, identity erosion, trauma, caretaking, standing up for self-worth, shame, embarrassment, autonomy, society norms, belief systems, normalization of behavior, boundary setting, child physical abuse, and the hard-won freedom that comes from reclaiming her life. Content Warning: This episode includes discussion of suicidal ideation and physical abuse involving a child. Click if you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title to read about Coercive Control as Care: Signs & PatternsSign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse Q&A, Brandon talks with High Conflict Divorce Expert, Jody Willson Pasicznyk, about high conflict divorce, attorney management, the litigation process, and story telling.To reach Jody, ⁠click here.If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick here to read our in depth article on Weaponized Incompetence. Sign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse Q&A, Brandon Chadwick discusses "weaponized incompetence" in relationships, where one partner consistently fails at tasks to shift responsibility to the other, leading to exhaustion and control. Survivors often manage household chores, finances, and emotional labor, while abusers claim incompetence. The episode aims to provide language and understanding for survivors, emphasizing that this manipulation is not their fault.If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick here to read our in depth article on Weaponized Incompetence. Sign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this educational reflection episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Brandon revisits Wednesday’s survivor story and breaks down the patterns of grooming, manipulation, and coercive control that shaped her experience with an abusive college professor.What began as attention and support slowly evolved into gaslighting, rage, sexual coercion, isolation, and the erosion of self-trust. This follow-up explores how early family boundary violations and people-pleasing conditioned Wednesday to take on responsibility for others’ emotions — making fear, obligation, guilt, and shame powerful tools of control.Brandon highlights the key themes from Wednesday’s story, including grooming by authority figures, emotional manipulation, self-blame, and the long process of reclaiming boundaries and autonomy.The episode closes with insights focused on healing — learning to trust your instincts, releasing false responsibility, seeking safe support, and breaking cycles of trauma.If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title of our blog to read the Emotional Abuse Checklist.Sign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Wednesday shares her journey of being groomed into an abusive relationship and the long road toward recognizing manipulation, control, and exploitation. Entering the relationship at a young age, Wednesday was slowly conditioned through attention, affection, and psychological grooming that evolved into isolation, coercive control, and escalating emotional and psychological abuse. What began as seeming care and guidance gradually transformed into domination, fear, and dependency, leaving Wednesday trapped in a cycle of trauma bonding and self-doubt.It’s a story of grooming, power imbalances, coercive control, love bombing, trauma bonding, emotional abuse, manipulation, gaslighting, isolation, sexual assault, sexual abuse, sexual coercion, suicidal ideation, intermittent reinforcement, fear-based compliance, shame, guilt, control, intimidation, dependency, financial manipulation, identity erosion, boundary violations, psychological conditioning, cognitive dissonance, self-blame, awakening, rebuilding self-trust, healing, and ultimately, reclaiming autonomy and self-worth. CONTENT WARNING - THIS EPISODE DISCUSSES SEXUAL ASSAULT, SEXUAL ABUSE, SEXUAL COERCION, & SUICIDAL IDEATION.Click if you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title of our blog to read our complete guide to weaponized incompetence.Sign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Lynn tells her story of coming to terms that what she dealt with was emotional abuse. Like many, it's hard to tell what is and what isn't abuse, especially if it's been normalized or you don't think it's 'bad enough'. Lynn didn't think the patronizing micro-management she received warranted leaving her 25+ year marriage to a bullying Mr. Right. He was a master at stretching Lynn to her limits, only to let go so the cycles could restart again. It's a story of bullying, micro-management, gaslighting, rage, lies, patronization, embarrassment, the silent treatment, abuse cycles, mind reading, neglect, deflection, being right, put downs, and control. CONTENT WARNING - This episode discusses physical abuse of a teenager. If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title of our blog to read the Emotional Abuse Checklist.Sign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, we welcome back Daniel, a survivor guest who first shared his story in June 2024. Daniel returns to reflect on what healing has looked like since then, as he continues recovering from abuse by his narcissistic father. Daniel talks openly about emotional suppression, CPTSD, people-pleasing, and the coping strategies he developed to survive—and how those same strategies began to limit him in adulthood. He explores what it means to honor his authentic self, unlearn survival behaviors, and move toward a life guided by presence rather than fear. We also discuss how this ongoing healing has affected Daniel’s work, relationships, and sense of identity, including his reconnection with music and the quiet joy of experiencing life more honestly. This episode is a reflection on recovery, self-trust, and what can emerge when survival is no longer the only goal. Link to -> Pete Walker Book Link to -> Gabor Mate Book Link to -> Adult Survivors of Child Abuse Link to -> Daniel & The Abuse Cycle Dad If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.me Click on the title of our blog to read the Emotional Abuse Checklist. Sign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this Narcissist Apocalypse reflection episode, we return to Kris’s survivor story to explore what it means to live in the fog of fear, obligation, and guilt. We look at how these forces quietly keep survivors tethered long after the abuse, and why clarity often comes slowly, not all at once. This episode is about naming what lingered — and beginning to loosen its hold.If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title of our blog to read the Emotional Abuse Checklist.Sign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Kris shares her journey of surviving childhood trauma and escaping an abusive relationship with a narcissistic partner. Growing up in a chaotic household with an authoritarian father, Kris learned early on to seek external validation and to read the moods of those around her for survival. These patterns primed her for manipulation, and when she met her future husband as a teenager, she became entangled in an isolating, controlling relationship marked by emotional abuse, intermittent reinforcement, gaslighting, and escalating physical abuse.It’s a story of trauma bonding, authoritarian family dynamics, scapegoating, external validation, emotional abuse, triangulation, push-pull cycles, gaslighting, intermittent reinforcement, hoovering, generational trauma, future faking, guilt, shame, intimidation, control, isolation, financial abuse, smear campaigns, projection, physical abuse, sexual abuse, reproductive coercion, parental alienation, DARVO, self-blame, therapy, cognitive awakening, parallel parenting, and ultimately, rediscovering oneself. CONTENT WARNING - THIS EPISODE DISCUSSES PHYSICAL ABUSE, SEXUAL ABUSE, AND REPRODUCTIVE COERCION If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title of our blog to read the Emotional Abuse Checklist.Sign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse Q&A, Brandon Chadwick and Susie Wendel discuss the importance of going no contact with an abuser, emphasizing the need to break the trauma bond. Susie highlights the significance of healing, gaining clarity, and regulating the nervous system. They address common challenges like fear, obligation, and guilt, and stress the importance of preparing mentally and emotionally. To reach Susie Wendel, click here.If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title of our blog to read the Emotional Abuse Checklist.Sign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Mildred shares her story of abuse, starting with her abusive childhood and learning how to 'fix people'. Mildred details her tumultuous relationship with her abusive partner, including his substance abuse, emotional instability, physical intimidation, erratic behavior, minimization of feelings, and taking zero responsibility around the home. Despite these hardships, Mildred pursued her career and achieved financial independence. However, tough choices needed to be made when it came to custody and her partners wealthy family. It's a battle still being waged today. It's a story of substance abuse, emotional instability, physical intimidation, erratic behavior, minimization of feelings, taking zero responsibility, generational trauma, crossed sexual boundaries, Hiding things at young, internalized sexism, fixing people, control, gaslighting, projection, passive aggression, infidelity, weapon obsession, using children as weapons, court, and custody.CONTENT WARNING - THIS EPISODE DISCUSSES CROSSED SEXUAL BOUNDARIESIf you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title of our blog to read the Emotional Abuse Checklist.Sign up to our Domestic Violence Newsletter  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse Q&A, Bobby Thrasher, a lawyer specializing in child sexual abuse, discussed the Circle of Hope Girls Ranch in Missouri, which operated from 2006 to 2020. The ranch, which promised reform and education, was revealed to be a site of severe abuse and neglect. Thrasher highlighted the lack of oversight and accreditation in such institutions, especially those with religious components. He emphasized the need for legislative changes, including extending the statute of limitations for child sexual abuse cases. Thrasher also shared insights on supporting survivors, advocating for legal reforms, and the challenges of dealing with institutional abuse.Booby Thrasher can be reached at https://monseesmayer.com/If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title of our blog to read the Emotional Abuse Checklist. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse Q&A, Brandon discusses the things abuse survivors have lost from narcissistic abuse and the therapy modalities to help get some of these things back. Brandon delves into the loss of self, self-worth, self-confidence, emotional stability, financial stability, possessions, trust, family, friends, children, sanity, security, boundaries, innocence, happiness, self-respect, reputation, sleep, hobbies, interests, feelings, health, and much more. If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title of our blog to read the Emotional Abuse Checklist. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Myrtle shares her experience of being in a toxic relationship with a projecting abuser. Growing up in a single-parent household, Myrtle met her partner and was immediately attracted to his charm and ambition. However, his behavior became erratic, marked by double standards, nitpicking, putdowns, marked lies, manipulation, and emotional abuse tactics. Despite his promises of a shared future, Myrtle’s ex became more distant, leading to infidelity, and a hard discard.It’s a story of projection, intermittent reinforcement, cognitive dissonance, putdowns, nitpicking, invalidation, double standards, infidelity,  manipulation, lies, belittling, people pleasing, inter-generational trauma gaslighting, isolation, and self-worth.CONTENT WARNING - THIS EPISODE DISCUSSES SEXUAL COERCIONIf you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.meClick on the title of our blog to read the Emotional Abuse Checklist. Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Louise shares her story about being married to a controlling abuser. Louise dealt with verbal, emotional, and financial abuse from her husband for 25 years. She no longer knew who she was. To make matters worse, she was gaslighting her children about their dad, and at the same time, she was being alienated from them as well. The transformation Louise makes to prove to herself that she is not what her husband and, eventually, her kids, said she was is truly remarkable. She's a beacon of hope for all.It's a story of inter-generational trauma, verbal abuse, emotional abuse, belittling, putdowns, parental alienation, invalidation, gaslighting, codependency, foundations, depression, identity, and taking your power back.If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.me Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Mabel shares her experience of being in a manipulative relationship with a narcissistic abuser. Mabel met her abuser at a bar and was initially intrigued by his boldness. Despite his persistent boundary violations, Mabel was drawn in by his love bombing and mirroring of her interests. Over time, Mabel's abuser gaslit her, made her feel guilty, and manipulated her into staying. Mabel's story highlights the emotional abuse, guilt, and manipulation she endured, including his attempts to control her through suicide threats and emotional blackmail. It's a story of love bombing, cognitive dissonance, nitpicking, guilt, gaslighting, kernels of truth, manipulation, hoovering, suicide threats, jealousy, infidelity, persistence, boundary pushing, emotional abuse, devaluation, trauma bonding, push-pull relationship, toxic relationship, mirroring, stalking, no contact, self-blame, bad therapists, validation, isolation, and self-worth.If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠click here⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠⁠ or send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.me  Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.

In this episode of Narcissist Apocalypse, Brandon talks with Clementine about her abusive relationship with an altruistic narcissist. Clementine was a cancer survivor who fell in love with a cancer organization leader, only to find out that he was nothing like the altruistic person he portrayed in public. It’s a story of neurodivergency, sexual assault, infidelity, making yourself small, hoovering, and financial abuse, attachment disorders, depersonalization, compartmentalization, guilt, breadcrumbs, the discard, future faking, trust, and withdrawals. *** CONTENT WARNING - This episode discusses sexual assault and two suicide attempts. ***If you want to be a guest on our survivor story podcast, please ⁠send us an email at narcissistapocalypse@pm.me Hosted by Simplecast, an AdsWizz company. See pcm.adswizz.com for information about our collection and use of personal data for advertising.