NICUP

In this opening episode, I set the baseline for this mini-series: what severe ADHD looks like in my real life when I strip away labels and speak honestly. I break down medication inconsistency, RSD as my core trigger, internal and external overload, health anxiety, the “dark tunnel” at night, and the day-to-day reality of trying to stay functional under pressure.This is my first-person account of habit loops, gambling harm, debt caused by executive-function breakdown, customer service punishment cycles, trust issues, and survival-mode parenting — including why I can seem “OTT” protective when I’ve lived proof that life can change without warning.This isn’t a polished hero story. It’s my operating system behind the chaos, and the baseline for everything that comes next.

I break down what Rejection Sensitive Dysphoria actually feels like — how it shows up, what it does to your body, and the stories your brain can attach to small moments like tone shifts, silence, or being corrected. I also explain why it can hit hardest in relationships, how shutdown gets misunderstood, and what helps without walking on eggshells.

In this episode, I’m sharing my personal experience with ADHD medication: what worked, what didn’t, and why there’s no such thing as a one-size-fits-all approach. This isn’t medical advice and it isn’t theory — it’s lived reality.

This episode is on hyperfocus, the so-called ADHD superpower. I give my views on the subject and explain the reasons I don’t believe it is a superpower.

In this episode of NICUP, I go deep into what RSD actually feels like — how silence becomes personal, how tone changes trigger threat, and why reactions can feel automatic rather than chosen.

This is an insight into RSD (rejection sensitivity dysphoria). I feel it is one of the biggest parts of ADHD. It can make or break you in a lot of situations.I recommend this episode for partners of ADHDers

An introduction to the podcast.

In this episode, I break down why relationships involving ADHD so often struggle, not from a place of blame or excuses, but from a place of understanding what’s actually going on beneath the surface.