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Our Voices, Our Stories: Preserving the history of gay men living in Western North Carolina.
Our Voices, Our Stories: Preserving the history of gay men living in Western North Carolina.
Author: Butch Thompson, butchOUT
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© Butch Thompson, butchOUT
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‘Our Voices, Our Stories’ is dedicated to preserving, celebrating, and sharing the diverse lived experiences of gay men in Western North Carolina. Through personal narratives, oral histories, and multimedia storytelling, we aim to honor the resilience, identity, and cultural contributions of our community—past and present. By amplifying these voices, we foster understanding, connection, and a richer, more inclusive regional history for future generations.
6 Episodes
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In this heartfelt episode of "Our Voices, Our Stories," Keith Robinette shares his profound journey of self-discovery and acceptance as a gay man raised in a conservative Southern Baptist environment. His story speaks to the struggles many LGBTQ+ individuals face, highlighting the importance of embracing one’s true self despite societal pressures.Growing Up Different: The Early YearsKeith grew up in Rogersville, Tennessee, a small town where he experienced the warmth of community and the closeness of church life. Yet, beneath this wholesome exterior lay a growing awareness of his differences. From a young age, Keith felt a disconnect as he observed his friends' attractions to girls, while his own feelings were directed towards boys. At just five years old, Keith's innocent crush on the boy next door marked the beginning of his internal struggle. He recalls writing his first note to this friend, a gesture that signified his early understanding of being different. However, the path to self-acceptance was fraught with confusion and despair. "I remember praying to God, asking him to take me away because I felt so miserable," he shares. This sentiment resonates deeply with many in the LGBTQ+ community who grapple with similar feelings of isolation.Navigating Bullying and Church DoctrineAs Keith transitioned into high school, the challenges intensified. He vividly recalls the moment he was bullied for his perceived differences— a classmate shouted, "Run, faggot, run." This traumatic experience compounded the internalized shame he felt, especially in a community where church teachings often condemned homosexuality. Keith's upbringing in a Southern Baptist environment further complicated his journey. He faced sermons filled with fire and brimstone messages condemning homosexuality, leaving him feeling like a "horrible person" for his feelings. Despite trying to conform by dating girls, he often felt like an outsider, navigating a world that seemed to reject him. The Search for Self-Acceptance in CollegeAfter high school, Keith’s journey took him to community college, where he began to explore his identity more freely. He recalls noticing the subtle signs of a hidden LGBTQ+ culture on campus, which both intrigued and frightened him. "This is really starting to come to life, and I didn't want it to," he reflects, indicating the internal battle between self-acceptance and fear of societal rejection.His first real gay experience, however, left him feeling confused and ashamed. "I went home and took three or four baths, trying to wash it all away," he admits. This moment encapsulated the struggle many face when confronting their true selves amidst societal norms.A Turning Point: Marriage and FatherhoodIn an unexpected twist, Keith met a woman while working at a local grocery store, leading to marriage and the birth of twin daughters. Yet, even as a father, he struggled with his identity. The pressure to maintain a heterosexual façade weighed heavily on him, leading to emotional turmoil. "I struggled a lot with being a father who would leave his children," he shares, revealing the complexity of his situation. Ultimately, Keith's journey of self-discovery culminated in a pivotal moment where he realized he could no longer suppress his true identity. "All of the walls that I had built just kind of cracked," he describes, marking the beginning of his journey towards authenticity and acceptance.Keith Robinette's story is a powerful reminder of the importance of embracing our true selves. His journey from a small-town upbringing fraught with confusion and bullying to a place of self-acceptance illustrates the challenges many in the LGBTQ+ community face. By sharing his experiences, Keith not only sheds light on the struggles faced by many but also inspires others to embrace their authenticity, fostering a more inclusive and understanding society.
Our final segment of our time with Bear, talking about his extraordinary life.In a heartfelt and candid podcast discussion, Bear shares his inspiring journey of resilience and transformation within the LGBTQ+ community of Asheville, North Carolina. From personal struggles with homelessness to finding purpose in ministry, Bear's story is a testament to the power of community, love, and acceptance.The Struggles of Transition Bear opens up about a pivotal moment in his life when a breakup with his partner, Larry, led him into a dark period. Feeling lost and alone, Bear faced homelessness for three months, a reality he kept hidden from his parents. He recalls a particularly harrowing night spent in frigid temperatures, where a simple kerosene heater and a can of green beans became his lifeline. "That was the best station green manager I ever had in my life," he reflects, illustrating how even the smallest comforts can become monumental during tough times. Finding Community Upon returning home, Bear realized the necessity of being around people who understood his identity. He discovered a support group called Closer, which played a crucial role in his journey. This group, recognized as one of the longest-running support networks in North Carolina, helped him connect with others who shared similar experiences. Bear recounts his love for John, a key figure in his life, and his involvement with the AIDS community, emphasizing the importance of support and connection during difficult times.Embracing Ministry and Activism As Bear settled into his new life in Nashville, he felt a calling back to ministry. He began officiating weddings, including a memorable baptism in a restaurant, a unique experience that showcased his commitment to inclusivity. He recalls the challenges he faced from traditional clergy who doubted his legitimacy, yet he persisted, building a welcoming space for those marginalized by mainstream churches. "It ain't got nothing to do with dogma... it's about how they have been valued or devalued," he asserts, highlighting his mission to create a safe haven for all.Celebrating Diversity and Resilience Bear shares anecdotes from his time in Asheville, where he witnessed the richness of the LGBTQ+ community. From memorial services at local bars to the historical significance of the gay community, Bear paints a vivid picture of a place where diversity and vibrancy thrive. He reflects on moments of connection and acceptance, such as when he baptized an adult under a tree beside a coffee house, reinforcing the idea that love transcends societal norms.Key Takeaways Bear's journey is a powerful reminder of the strength found in community and the importance of embracing one's identity. Through his struggles and triumphs, he exemplifies how love and acceptance can foster resilience in the face of adversity. His story encourages others to find their voice and navigate their paths with authenticity and hope.
In our continuing captivating conversation, Andrew Gentry, affectionately known as Bear, shares his profound journey of spirituality and self-discovery. From his early attraction to Catholicism to his evolving understanding of faith, Bear's story is a testament to the power of personal exploration and the nuances between religion and spirituality.Early Influences and the Call to Faith Bear's spiritual journey began at the tender age of 13 when he developed a fascination with Catholicism, largely inspired by the character Friar Tuck from the Robin Hood series. This initial intrigue led him to take courses from the Knights of Columbus, and he excelled to the point of considering a calling to the priesthood. However, as he approached the preparatory seminary, he encountered the church's stance on homosexuality, which prompted a critical turning point in his life. Despite the challenges, Bear never lost his sense of calling, illustrating the complexity of faith in the face of societal norms.Exploring Acceptance and Mentorship At 19, an article featuring Bishop Bartholomew Joseph Cunningham shifted Bear's perspective. The Bishop's acceptance of being gay as non-impeding towards his ministry resonated deeply with Bear. He reached out to Bishop Cunningham, leading to a mentorship that lasted two years. This relationship provided Bear with a supportive framework to explore his faith without the constraints of traditional dogma. His journey underscores the importance of seeking guidance from open-minded mentors in one’s spiritual quest.Redefining Purity and SpiritualityBear reflects on the teachings of purity he encountered in early catechism, challenging conventional interpretations that often equate purity with biology. He emphasizes that true purity lies in having a singleness of purpose, advocating for a more holistic understanding of spirituality that transcends rigid religious dogmas. This perspective highlights the need for personal interpretation of spiritual teachings, allowing individuals to connect with their faith on a deeper level.The Radical Teachings of JesusBear articulates a significant distinction between the spirituality of Jesus and the religion of the Christ. He argues that Jesus’s teachings were fundamentally about love and acceptance, not about adherence to strict rules. Through anecdotes, such as Jesus’s interactions with marginalized individuals, Bear illustrates the radical nature of Jesus's message, which challenges modern interpretations of faith that may promote exclusion.Personal Reflections and Lessons from FamilyDrawing inspiration from his grandfather, an educated clergyman who advocated for love and acceptance, Bear shares personal anecdotes that shaped his understanding of spirituality. His grandfather’s teachings about love evolving over time serve as a poignant reminder that true love and understanding deepen with experience. This familial influence reinforces the idea that spirituality is not static but rather a dynamic journey of growth and learning.Bear’s journey through spirituality reveals the profound differences between the constraints of organized religion and the freedom found in personal spirituality. His reflections challenge listeners to explore their own beliefs, encouraging a deeper connection with faith that emphasizes love, acceptance, and understanding. Key takeaways include the importance of mentorship, the need for personal interpretation of spirituality, and the recognition that love is at the core of true spiritual practice.
In the vibrant tapestry of LGBTQ history, personal stories often serve as powerful reminders of the struggles and triumphs faced by individuals within the community. In this three part series of "Our Voices, Our Stories," we delve into the remarkable journey of Andrew Gentry, affectionately known as Bear, as he shares his experiences from his time in Atlanta to his life in Western North Carolina.The Origin of a NameBear's name is more than just a moniker; it reflects a pivotal moment in his life. While working off-duty security at Bulldogs, a prominent gay bar in Atlanta, Bear found himself in a physical altercation when two patrons began fighting. In the midst of the chaos, he used his strength to intervene, earning the praise of a nearby queen who exclaimed, "You hugged like another bear!" This moment not only gave him his nickname but also marked the beginning of his journey into the gay community.Life in AtlantaBear’s time in Atlanta was marked by both challenges and unforgettable experiences. He recalls a particularly harrowing encounter involving a man he identified as Cherokee who had just been released from prison. Bear's quick thinking and compassion prevented a potentially dangerous situation, showcasing the unique dynamics that unfolded in the nightlife of Atlanta. He also shares a humorous anecdote about a trip to Detroit to retrieve his partner's stolen car, highlighting the absurdity of life and the colorful characters that inhabit the LGBTQ community.Navigating Security and IdentityBear's career in security at the Georgia Tech Police Department provided a fascinating backdrop for his experiences. He recounted an encounter with agents from the FBI and KGB, revealing the intersection of security and identity in a world where being openly gay was still fraught with challenges. His humorous yet poignant tales illustrate both the absurdity and seriousness of navigating his professional life while being openly gay.Community and Activism As Bear reflects on the early days of LGBTQ activism, he shares stories of encounters with religious groups protesting outside bars, and the political landscape that shaped the community's evolution. His recollections of the first Pride march and the various factions within the LGBTQ community serve as compelling reminders of the ongoing struggle for acceptance and equality. Bear’s journey is a testament to the resilience and spirit of the LGBTQ community. His stories not only highlight the joy and camaraderie found within the community but also the challenges faced along the way. From the humorous to the harrowing, Bear’s experiences provide a unique lens through which to view the history of gay men in Western North Carolina. Key takeaways include the importance of community support, the evolution of LGBTQ identity, and the ongoing fight for equality and acceptance.
In the heart of Western North Carolina lies Asheville, a city known for its vibrant culture and progressive values, particularly within the LGBTQ+ community. The second part in our conversation with our host, Butch, explores his experiences in Asheville, highlighting the challenges he faced and the supportive networks that have emerged. Through his personal stories and initiatives, we will see how community-building can transform lives and foster acceptance.Creating a Safe Space in AshevilleWhen considering a move to Asheville, many LGBTQ+ individuals find solace in the city’s reputation as a blue bubble in a predominantly conservative region. As Butch reflected, the welcoming atmosphere of Asheville, often referred to as a 'hippie town', offers a sense of comfort and acceptance. However, stepping just outside the city limits can reveal a starkly different culture, emphasizing the need for safe spaces within the community.Finding Community Through Shared InterestsUpon moving to Asheville, Butch discovered that while the city has its share of bars and social spots, something was missing— a true sense of community. To combat this, he turned to his passion for singing and joined the Asheville Gay Men's Chorus. This decision became a springboard for deeper connections, ultimately leading him to take on leadership roles within the organization and beyond. His story illustrates how engaging in local activities can help forge lasting friendships and create supportive networks.From Chorus to Bowling LeagueThe journey didn’t stop with the chorus; it evolved into the creation of a gay bowling league, a fantastic example of how community can be built around shared interests. This initiative brought together individuals from various backgrounds, creating friendships and connections that may not have otherwise formed. The bowling league became a catalyst for community engagement, demonstrating how recreational activities can break down barriers and foster inclusivity.The Impact of Nonprofit InitiativesAs community involvement grew, so did the desire to give back. Butch soon found himself at the helm of Blue Ridge Pride, a nonprofit organization dedicated to supporting the LGBTQ+ community. His journey through volunteer work highlighted the challenges of burnout and the importance of finding balance while contributing to meaningful causes. The creation of his own nonprofit, butchOUT, aimed to raise awareness and funds for various organizations, showcasing the power of grassroots initiatives in driving change.Addressing Discrimination and StigmaDespite the progress and acceptance found in Asheville, the conversation about discrimination remains crucial. The challenges faced by individuals within the LGBTQ+ community, particularly those living with HIV, underscore the ongoing need for education and awareness. As Butch poignantly noted, the stigma surrounding HIV still exists, and it is vital to use personal experiences to educate others and foster understanding.The experiences shared in this podcast aim to reveal both the challenges and triumphs of LGBTQ+ individuals in Asheville. Community-building efforts, whether through shared interests or nonprofit initiatives, play a critical role in fostering acceptance and connection. As we continue to navigate issues of discrimination, it’s essential to remember the importance of education and compassion in creating inclusive spaces for all.
Welcome to this insightful exploration of personal stories and journeys of self-acceptance. In this episode, we delve into the experiences of Butch (our host), a gay man who grew up in the conservative and often traditional surroundings of Southwest Virginia. His story not only highlights the complexities of growing up gay in a small town but also sheds light on the challenges and triumphs that come with self-discovery and acceptance.Growing Up in Southwest Virginia Butch’s formative years were spent in the picturesque mountains of Southwest Virginia. He describes his upbringing as a typical country boy, deeply rooted in family and community. Butch recalls attending a small Methodist church where he was surrounded by family but never heard discussions about homosexuality. The absence of open conversations about sexuality made it difficult for him to understand his own feelings and identity. The Struggle with Identity As Butch navigated his teenage years, he found himself grappling with his sexuality. He shared that he never considered himself different until he reached puberty. Despite feeling a sense of confusion, he believed his feelings were merely a phase. Butch's attempts to conform to societal norms included playing hockey and participating in activities that didn’t resonate with his true self. This internal conflict led to a series of experiences that shaped his understanding of who he was. Coming Out Only after college did Butch begin to embrace his identity as a gay man. He reflects on his marriage during this time, acknowledging the pressure to conform to societal expectations. The advice from his college friends pushed him to confront his truth, leading to a challenging coming out process. Butch describes the emotional turmoil he faced, particularly after losing a child and feeling as though it was a punishment for being gay. The Impact of Society and Religion Growing up in a religious environment added another layer of complexity to Butch’s journey. He recalls feeling ashamed and conflicted, often believing that his struggles were due to divine punishment. The stigma surrounding homosexuality in his community was palpable, and Butch felt compelled to hide his true self to avoid judgment and rejection. A New Beginning in Atlanta After testing positive for HIV, Butch realized he needed a fresh start. Moving to Atlanta marked a significant turning point in his life. In this vibrant city, he found a supportive community and a space where he could explore his identity more freely. Butch's journey towards acceptance took shape as he became more involved in the gay community and found mentors who guided him through the challenges of living with HIV. Butch’s story is a powerful reminder of the importance of acceptance and understanding in the journey of self-discovery. His experiences highlight the struggles faced by many in the LGBTQ+ community, particularly in conservative environments. Key takeaways from this journey include the significance of open dialogue about sexuality, the impact of societal norms on personal identity, and the transformative power of community support.




