Friends Keep Secrets

Lizzo comes over. We talk about Prince, losing our virginities, winning Grammy's, the best and worst days of Lizzo's life, idolizing Allen Iverson, and holding in farts. At one point Lizzo shows us her flautist skills and scores our fake movie trailers. Then we freestyle and things get very inappropriate so probably don't listen to this with your parents! Unless you have that kind of relationship I guess. Thanks for listening - we respect you! What happens: 00:00 Intro  01:18 Germs 02:09 Fart gender dynamics 03:02 Half Detroit half Houston 04:04 The coolest voice 04:42 Mike Jones’ phone number 05:26 Hashiba 05:37 How it all happened 08:30 Performing while multi-tasking 09:47 The worst day of Lizzo's life 11:27 The best day of Lizzo's life 13:03 Talents 16:45 Flute 18:43 Improvised movie trailers 20:19 D*ckhole flute 20:44 How Lizzo met her boyfriend 22:46 DM slides 24:48 Dave in high school 27:13 Saying Denzel wrong 28:17 Dave's overnight camp deception 28:59 Prince 32:33 Regrets 34:32 Kristin wore pullups til 13 36:42 Grammy virginity pact 38:40 First kisses 39:59 AIM 40:55 The Allen Iverson opportunity 43:16 Presidents are tall 45:21 Internet comments 46:41 Giving Eminem's beat to Rihanna 47:34 The #1 male artist to collab with 50:00 Inappropriate freestyle 57:58 Lizzo didn't know she could sing 58:52 Producer credit 01:01:32 Lizzo's friend dynamic 01:03:33 New music 01:06:59 Dave's friend dynamic Thank you to KFC for sponsoring this episode: Prices and participation may vary. Prices higher in AK, HI, CA and third-party ordering websites. Tax, tip and fees extra. $7 KFC Box for One includes 1 Chicken Little, 5pc chicken nuggets, 3oz. fries, 1 sauce and med. drink. $9 KFC Box for One includes 2 Chicken Littles, 5pc chicken nuggets, 3oz. fries, 1 sauce and med. drink. $11 Box for One includes 1 chicken sandwich (choice of classic or spicy), 2pc tenders, 4oz. fries, 2 sauces and med. drink. All trademarks are the property of their respective owners. Thank you White Claw for sponsoring this episode: 21+ only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

VIEWER WARNING & LEGAL DISCLAIMER HEALTH & SAFETY WARNING The activity depicted in this program carries serious and potentially life-threatening health risks, including but not limited to choking, aspiration, gastric rupture, electrolyte imbalance, cardiac stress, and death. THIS PROGRAM DOES NOT CONSTITUTE MEDICAL OR NUTRITIONAL ADVICE. Nothing depicted or stated herein should be construed as a recommendation, endorsement, or instruction to engage in any similar activity. DO NOT ATTEMPT. By continuing to view this program, you acknowledge that you do so voluntarily and that the studio and all affiliated entities expressly disclaim all liability for any harm, injury, loss, or damage arising from or related to the content of this program or any attempt to replicate the activities shown. --- Dave says he can gain ten pounds in two hours. Benny says there’s no chance. They decide to settle it the only way that makes sense: with a bet. What follows is a rollercoaster discussion about math, pizza weight, digestion, and whether any of this is remotely possible. There are rules. There is a scale. There is a lot of food. It goes from joking to concerning and back again, and Jay Shetty comes by to weigh in (sorry) towards the end. That’s basically the episode. Thanks for watching! What happens: 00:00 Do not try this at home 01:53 The bet 03:50 First weigh-in 05:03 Mass is mass 06:03 Second weigh-in 07:09 Death by water 08:33 10 lb. weight 10:07 Dave's #1 fear 13:12 The Miracle on Ice 14:25 Rules 16:25 Burritos 19:23 Pizza 22:34 Doubts & concerns 24:29 The TB12 Method 27:01 Halfway point weigh-in 28:49 New strategies 30:42 Taxes 31:46 Don’t do this part 2 33:24 The details of water intoxication 35:36 Charity donations 38:32 Growth 41:21 30 minutes left 43:45 Being the bigger man 47:16 Jay Shetty stops by 50:38 The moral crossroads 52:53 1 minute left Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Kevin Gates comes by and hangs for a while. We talk about discipline, relationships, energy, and the mindset he tries to live by. It goes from funny to serious and back again pretty quickly. It was a truly special afternoon! Thanks for being here! What happens: 00:00 Famous Kevins 02:06 Half man, half amazing 03:04 Heartbreak 05:56 Sexual retention 09:28 Unibrow 10:12 Pubes 11:11 Blessed 12:11 Kevin’s favorite rapper 13:03 Titty man 14:27 Marriage 15:40 Jealousy 16:46 Top-tier expressions 18:23 High school 19:11 Mothers 21:42 Punched in the face 24:26 Sex, love & trauma bonds 26:30 Kevin’s book collection 28:23 Prison 32:00 Dinosaur d*ck 36:22 Ass 38:09 Billboard's 8th-ranked producer 39:50 Kevin’s process 41:26 Siberian lynx 43:08 Lil Dick Gates 45:30 Dinosaur d*ck (part 2) 47:35 Benny’s favorite scenario 50:06 Food 52:53 Farts 55:13 Movies 56:38 Mushy 01:01:16 Friends Thanks to Domino's for sponsoring this episode: PRICES HIGHER IN SOME LOCATIONS. Valid online through 4/6. Visit dominos.com for full offer details. Select this online only offer from 2/23-4/6. Size availability varies by crust type. Max. 7 toppings (6 for NY Style and Pan crust). Parmesan Stuffed Crust will be extra. Excludes XL and Specialty Pizzas. Min. purchase required for delivery. Prices, participation, delivery area and charges may vary. Thank you White Claw for sponsoring this episode: 21+ only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Ed Sheeran stops by the house to talk about how he met Dave, being clumsy, sailing across the ocean with Benny, whether his kids know he’s Ed Sheeran yet, his Game of Thrones backlash, and how he acquired the Edward Scissorhands hands. Later he writes a song with all of us. It’s a really special moment. Thanks for listening! What happens: 00:00 Teaser 00:34 What's this Chuck stuff 02:01 How Dave met Ed 03:48 Exercise & personal hygiene 06:24 Ed's clumsiness 09:26 English food vs American food 10:58 Ed's town 15:20 Creepy baby 17:28 Ed & Benny on the boat 18:19 Fame 27:07 Anxiety 32:18 Best & worst days of Ed's life 35:18 Ideal headline 39:17 Dave's movie 43:14 Ed's memorabilia collection 47:54 Ed's Game of Thrones backlash 49:20 Dave's sh*t story 52:41 Ed Sheeran shows 01:06:01 Ed's songwriting 01:08:44 Ed writes a song Thanks to Domino's for sponsoring this episode: PRICES HIGHER IN SOME LOCATIONS. Valid online through 4/6. Visit dominos.com for full offer details. Select this online only offer from 2/23-4/6. Size availability varies by crust type. Max. 7 toppings (6 for NY Style and Pan crust). Parmesan Stuffed Crust will be extra. Excludes XL and Specialty Pizzas. Min. purchase required for delivery. Prices, participation, delivery area and charges may vary. Thank you White Claw for sponsoring this episode: 21+ only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We tried to write a proper description for this and couldn’t decide on what all to highlight so here’s a bunch. Selena comes over. At some point we decide to go through her DMs. We talk about her mental health. We get into her’s and Benny’s wedding. We talk about Taylor and the insanely thoughtful gift she gave Selena. There are multiple arm wrestling contests with surprising end results. Selena bonks her head at one point. No one edits it out. It’s just us hanging out with our friend (and spouse). That’s really it. Thanks for listening, we appreciate you!! What happens: 0:00 Selena arrives + should we fake the knock 5:15 Benny comes up with Grace and Frankie 7:25 Going through Selena’s DMs 9:43 Dave is forced to eat a pickle  11:25 Mental health 18:12 Selena entering Benny’s world 22:45 The best day of Selena’s life 24:12 The wedding 31:22 Benny cracks Selena’s back 32:35 The wedding pt 2 41:15 Children and family 44:51 Everyone loves Rihanna 47:35 Taylor’s gift 53:40 What we would do for our friends 58:20 Arm wrestling 1:02:30 Friends!!! Thanks to Domino's for sponsoring this episode: PRICES HIGHER IN SOME LOCATIONS. Valid online through 4/6. Visit dominos.com for full offer details. Select this online only offer from 2/23-4/6. Size availability varies by crust type. Max. 7 toppings (6 for NY Style and Pan crust). Parmesan Stuffed Crust will be extra. Excludes XL and Specialty Pizzas. Min. purchase required for delivery. Prices, participation, delivery area and charges may vary. Thank you White Claw for sponsoring this episode: 21+ only. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

We’ve been writing this description for 15 minutes and haven’t made any real progress. It’s not even we, it’s just Dave here. All I can tell you guys, is that I’ve never had more fun doing anything in my life than when we’re filming these. Are we fun to hang out with? Who knows. All we can do is be our complete selves, live in the moment, and see what happens. Thank you for your time. We appreciate you!!!! What happens: 0:00 toilet cam cold open 0:09 what are we even doing here? 1:38 who are you supposed to be on camera? 8:58 the domino’s pizza fight begins 13:32 why everything feels awkward at first 18:41 benny vs bj novak vs reality 23:34 creative pressure and proving yourself 30:26 phone calls derail everything 34:01 cooking turns into chaos 37:57 the marinade argument escalates 41:09 fighting like real friends do 46:28 did the pilot actually work? Thanks to Domino's for sponsoring this episode: PRICES HIGHER IN SOME LOCATIONS. Valid online through 4/6. Visit dominos.com for full offer details. Select this online only offer from 2/23-4/6. Size availability varies by crust type. Max. 7 toppings (6 for NY Style and Pan crust). Parmesan Stuffed Crust will be extra. Excludes XL and Specialty Pizzas. Min. purchase required for delivery. Prices, participation, delivery area and charges may vary. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Welcome to Friends Keep Secrets: a first-of-its-kind show from best friends benny blanco, Lil Dicky (Dave Burd), and Dave’s wife, Kristin Batalucco.  With more than 18 hidden cameras rigged throughout Dave and Kristin’s LA home, the show brings viewers inside an intimate hang with the hosts' real-life friendships and the guests that pop in. This isn’t a formal interview show. They might cook, record a song, play a game, or simply hang out. Blending elements of a podcast, livestream, and sitcom, Friends Keep Secrets captures the magic of being in the room with the hosts and the people they cherish most. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices