Good Girls Talk About Sex

Julia shares an awkward role-playing attempt, the pleasure of surrendering control and entering subspace, and deeply trusting sexual relationships. TOPICS COVERED: Pretending to enjoy a sexual experience to avoid hurting a partner's feelings Laughter during sex, including the difference between playful laughter and embarrassment Negotiating sexual fantasies and finding ways to make role-playing enjoyable for both partners Communication, preparation, and consent when exploring sexual fantasies Acknowledging positive experiences in a relationship that later turned bad Leah's experience with role-playing and feeling unsettled by a partner's convincing performance Adopting different personas during sex versus everyday life Julia's first experience entering subspace during BDSM play How subspace quieted Julia's ADHD brain Trust and emotional safety in dominant/submissive dynamics Topping from the bottom Christian BDSM and the relationship between submission, patriarchy, and power Finding fantasies that feel comfortable and authentic   LINKS: Julia on TikTok Unlocking the Secret Meaning of "You're Topping from the Bottom" in Christian Relationships Spin the wheel: https://xoleahcarey.substack.com/p/podcast-questions Be a guest: https://www.leahcarey.com/guest Archive of GGTAS episodes from 2019 to 2024: https://www.goodgirlstalk.com Coaching with Leah: https://www.leahcarey.com 🎡 Want to submit a question for potential inclusion on the wheel? Drop a comment at Substack!

Nana lives in Ghana and talks about dating younger men, defying patriarchy, and her vision for bringing the African tradition of sexual aunties into modern sex education. TOPICS COVERED: Leah getting involved with a married man at age 21 Nana's recent sexual experience with a man 20 years younger Patriarchy and why Nana prefers dating younger men Age-gap relationships Dating and marriage in Ghana The challenge of finding partners who practice honest, ethical non-monogamy When partners dismiss or question clearly stated relationship boundaries How sexual relationships can be different from romantic partnerships Homophobia in Ghana and finding queer women to date How Nana meets people in Ghana and when she's traveling The traditional practice of ssenga (sexual aunties) in Uganda Creating modern versions of sexual aunties and uncles to support young people's sexual education   LINKS: The Sex Lives of African Women — Nana's book Seeking Sexual Freedom — Nana's book The African Pleasure Fairy Godmother — Nana's Substack publication @dfordarkoa - Nana's Instagram account — Podcast at Substack: https://xoleahcarey.substack.com/t/podcast Spin the wheel: https://xoleahcarey.substack.com/p/podcast-questions Be a guest: https://www.leahcarey.com/guest Archive of GGTAS episodes from 2019 to 2024: https://www.goodgirlstalk.com Coaching with Leah: https://www.leahcarey.com 🎡 Want to submit a question for potential inclusion on the wheel? Drop a comment at Substack!

Sophia returns to talk about how a spiritual connection makes sex deeper and more satisfying for her. TOPICS COVERED: Sex motivated by emotional and spiritual connection rather than horniness The difference between orgasm and climax Exploring Tantra without the traditional masculine/feminine language Learning what feels right sexually rather than a predictable script Sophia's evolution into polyamory since her original interview Kitchen-table polyamory and building a chosen family Sophia's relationships with her partner, metamour, and their children Preparing to tell children and older parents about the polycule Polyamory as expansive love rather than primarily about sex Questioning conventional relationship structures, including within queer relationships Dating and developing new connections while polyamorous Relationship anarchy and valuing romantic and platonic relationships without an automatic hierarchy   LINKS: THE AFTERSHOW: https://xoleahcarey.substack.com/p/podcast-sophia-orgasm-and-climax Sophia's original episode: https://www.goodgirlstalk.com/posts/podcast/menopause-sophia/   Spin the wheel: https://xoleahcarey.substack.com/p/podcast-questions Be a guest: https://www.leahcarey.com/guest Archive of GGTAS episodes from 2019 to 2024: https://www.goodgirlstalk.com Coaching with Leah: https://www.leahcarey.com

Gretchen returns to talk about the freedom to choose the sexual experiences she actually wants. TOPICS COVERED: Gretchen's late-in-life sexual awakening after years of believing sex wasn't something she would get to have Moving from sexual scarcity to feeling able to choose partners and experiences Working with a sex worker to transform her relationship with her body and sexuality The difference between talk therapy and embodied approaches to sexual healing Developing confidence in sexual desires and asking for what you want The value of skilled, attuned touch and paying attention to bodily responses Leah's parallel experience working with a sex worker How conventional sex education neglects pleasure and nuanced consent How popular culture centers the male perspective in its informal sexual education Gretchen becoming a sex coach and working with couples navigating non-monogamy   LINKS: Aftershow: https://xoleahcarey.substack.com/p/podcast-gretchen-my-body-didnt-change Coaching with Leah: https://www.leahcarey.com Gretchen's original interview: https://www.goodgirlstalk.com/posts/podcast/i-dont-equate-sex-and-love-gretchen/ Gretchen's coaching website: https://gretchenshanks.com/ Gretchen's Substack: Sex Outside The Lines Spin the wheel: https://xoleahcarey.substack.com/p/podcast-questions Be a guest: https://www.leahcarey.com/guest Archive of GGTAS episodes from 2019 to 2024: https://www.goodgirlstalk.com  

Annie explores her "straight-ish" sexuality, low sex drive, and desire for sex that grows out of deep emotional and intellectual connection. TOPICS COVERED: Annie's evolving understanding of her sexuality and identifying as "straight-ish" Being "philosophically queer" while primarily attracted to men Feeling different from people who experience a strong or spontaneous sex drive Wanting emotional and intellectual connection before sexual connection Sex as a form of connection rather than primarily physical pleasure or release The importance of feeling deeply known and seen by a sexual partner The usefulness — and limitations — of sexuality labels Wanting companionship, romance, commitment, and partnership even when sex isn't a high priority   LINKS: THE AFTERSHOW: https://xoleahcarey.substack.com/p/podcast-annie-my-body-doesnt-know Wheel spinner: https://xoleahcarey.substack.com/p/podcast-questions Be a guest: https://www.leahcarey.com/guest Archive of GGTAS episodes from 2019 to 2024: https://www.goodgirlstalk.com