The Escalation Podcast

Your body knows before your brain does. The meeting hasn't started, but something in the room already tells you it's not safe to speak. In this episode, I sit down with Kerry-Lyn Stanton-Downes - relationship psychotherapist, advisor, TEDx speaker, and author of the forthcoming "Beyond Words: How to Lead People from Survival to Success" (May 2026) - to explore why workplace mental health can't be fixed with individual coping tools alone. Kerry-Lyn's work centers on a powerful idea: the brain is a relational organ, and psychological safety isn't something leaders declare - it's something people experience in the space between them. This conversation moves away from frameworks and into something more familiar, but rarely named. Together with Kerry-Lyn, we explore: • Why your nervous system reacts before logic has time to catch up • How people adapt their behaviour in real time depending on the room they’re in • Why “high performance” often sits on top of unspoken tension and misalignment • The difference between what organisations say about culture and what people actually experience • Why many workplace challenges labelled as “individual issues” are, in reality, relational dynamics playing out • What happens to communication, trust, and decision-making when relational safety breaks down • And why the most important leadership skill isn’t technical, but something far less visible This is not a conversation about fixing people. It’s about seeing the system - and our place within it - more clearly. We're living through something most of us can feel but few are naming. What Kerry-Lyn calls "relational poverty". Not only in workplaces, but in all the spaces in between us. We're more connected than ever, surrounded by an endless flow of information, yet somehow the human gets forgotten. The relationships we often glorify - because they fill a certain void - feel weaker than ever. The quality of our connection is measured in likes, views and follows. And its not because we're not capable. It's because we've been focusing on the wrong kind of connection. The future exists - between us.

In this episode of The Escalation Podcast, I sit down with Allan Yip, a derivatives lawyer whose career spans more than three decades across private practice and global investment banks.   Allan began at the Bar before moving into banking and finance law at Clifford Chance during the industry’s expansion years. He later moved in-house at JPMorgan Chase and Bear Stearns, experiencing first-hand the shockwaves of the 2008 crisis, before returning to private practice as a partner at Simmons & Simmons.   He was at Bear Stearns when it collapsed. He was advising clients when Lehman Brothers fell. And he went on to build a leading buy-side derivatives practice during one of the most heavily regulated periods in financial history.   This is a conversation about defining moments and what they reveal.   We discuss: The realities of moving between in-house and private practice Why regulation is always reactive How negotiation is won through mindset, not ego The discipline of answering the question, not hiding behind “it’s standard” Managing escalation without retaliation Leadership that invites challenge rather than demands agreement   At its core, this episode is about longevity- what it takes to sustain a career in high-pressure environments without losing perspective, professionalism, or humility.   A huge thank you to Allan for sharing not only his technical insight, but the principles that shaped a remarkable career.   About Allan Yip:  Allan is a specialist in prime brokerage, derivatives, derivatives regulation and structured products. He advises hedge funds and institutional asset managers on all aspects of their trading relationships with market counterparties, including prime brokerage arrangements, derivatives documentation and broader trading agreements. He also provides specialist regulatory advice on derivatives and trading matters, including EMIR, SFTR, BRRD and BMR. Allan is a regular speaker and panelist at industry conferences, including those organized by International Swaps and Derivatives Association (ISDA) and Alternative Investment Management Association (AIMA), where he shares insight on derivatives markets and regulation.   Connect with him:  LinkedIn- https://www.linkedin.com/in/allanyip/?originalSubdomain=uk   ⏱ Episode Chapters 00:00 Introduction – Allan Yip’s 30-Year Legal Career 01:00 From the Bar to Banking Law 02:00 Growing Up & Falling Into Law 04:00 Joining Clifford Chance & Discovering Derivatives 06:00 Career Positioning & Work-Life Balance 09:00 The 2008 Financial Crisis – Bear Stearns & Lehman Collapse 12:00 Rebuilding After the Crisis 15:00 In-House vs Private Practice 17:00 Has the Industry Learned Since 2008? 20:00 Service, Humility & Career Lessons 23:00 Best Advice: “Great Change Comes Great Opportunity” 25:00 Why You Should Never Burn Bridges 26:00 Secrets to Successful Negotiation 29:00 Sun Tzu & Strategic Concessions 31:00 Handling Escalations Under Pressure 35:00 What Makes a Great Leader? 38:00 Final Reflections & Closing Thoughts  

In January 2025, Forbes named managing upwards the number one skill for surviving—and thriving—in corporate life.   And they were on to something. Your career isn’t built on output alone; it’s built on perceived value — on how effectively you translate your work into the language leadership understands and responds to.   In this episode of The Escalation Podcast, I unpack the art of managing up.   You’ll learn: 💡 How to build influence and credibility with the people above you. 💡 The 5 expert-backed tactics for managing up without kissing up (from HBR, Forbes, and Cambridge). 💡 How to map the real power structures in your organisation — the shadow networks that actually move decisions. 💡 And why visibility isn’t arrogance, it’s career currency.   Managing the management isn’t about pleasing people. It’s about strategy, emotional intelligence, and owning your narrative.   If you’ve ever felt unseen, unheard, or underestimated — this episode is the spark your career needs.     ⏱ Episode Chapters 00:00 – The Anxiety of Managing Up 01:00 – Why Managing Up Is a Career Superpower 01:30 – Lessons from Credit Suisse 02:30 – Influence vs Technical Skill 03:00 – Perceived Value vs Performance 04:00 – The Danger of Invisibility 05:00 – Aligning With Management’s Agenda 05:30 – 5 Tactics to Manage Up 06:00 – Adapt to Leadership Styles (incl. Man Group) 07:00 – Strategic Questions & Visibility 08:00 – Emotional Intelligence in Power Dynamics 09:00 – Understanding Real vs Official Power Structures 10:30 – Managing Up at Senior Levels 11:30 – Final Reflection: Who Owns Your Narrative?

At some point in your career, success stops being about capability and starts being about capacity.   Capacity to think clearly. Capacity to lead. Capacity to stay grounded under pressure.   In today’s episode of The Escalation Podcast, I sit down with Tom Ungi to explore what really sits behind performance in high-pressure environments - leadership, identity, resilience, and the human cost of always operating at the top.   This is not a conversation about frameworks or surface-level optimisation.   Tom brings a rare perspective shaped by nearly two decades inside elite finance, including his time as Managing Director and Head of Trading at Millennium, where he helped scale the business across Europe and the Middle East. He understands first-hand what sustained pressure, responsibility, and decision-making at the highest level actually demand.   Today, as Co-Founder and CEO of True Partnership, Tom works with hedge fund leaders, traders, and senior executives who want more than short-term performance. His work blends direct, results-driven methodologies with a deeply relational and empathetic approach - grounded in lived experience and academic research, including doctoral work on leadership and trauma.   This is one of those conversations that stays with you long after it ends.   Get to know Tom Ungi: Tom Ungi is Co-Founder and CEO of True Partnership and a former Managing Director and Head of Trading at Millennium, where he spent nearly 20 years leading growth across Europe and the Middle East. Now an executive coach, Tom helps leaders challenge assumptions, navigate complexity, and drive meaningful results.  He holds an MSc in Executive Coaching and is pursuing a doctorate focused on leadership and trauma.   Connect with him: Website: https://truepartnership.com/ Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/company/truepartnership       ⏱ Episode Chapters 00:00 Introduction – From Millennium to Coaching 02:00 Alpha vs Self-Awareness 03:45 Why Awareness Requires a Pause 05:00 The Pivot: From Trading Floor to Coaching 07:55 What Coaching Really Is (Developmental, Performance, Transformational) 10:22 Emotions in Finance & Psychological Safety 13:39 Values Under Pressure 16:03 Patterns That Block Promotion 19:14 Why Hard Work Stops Working at Senior Level 21:55 Imposter Syndrome – Lean Into It 24:38 Burnout & Hidden Stress Signals 27:02 Leadership Responsibility & Awareness 28:07 The Desire to Be Liked in Finance 29:06 Losing Yourself to Fit In

Imposter syndrome is often framed as a weakness - something to fix, silence, or overcome. But in high-performance careers, that narrative misses something important.   In this episode of The Escalation Podcast, I explore imposter syndrome through a different lens: not as a flaw in confidence, but as a psychological signal that often appears at the edges of growth.   Drawing on psychology, behavioral research, and real-world experience from banking, finance, law, and consulting, this episode unpacks why self-doubt shows up most powerfully in environments where standards are high, expectations are relentless, and visibility matters.   You’ll learn: Why doubt tends to whisper rather than shout — and why that makes it so convincing How the brain’s survival wiring confuses unfamiliarity with incapability Why confidence doesn’t always rise alongside competence The different patterns imposter syndrome takes (perfectionism, over-preparation, paralysis, people-pleasing) How identity, upbringing, and corporate culture shape the way high performers experience self-doubt Why many of the most capable professionals struggle to internalise success And how reframing imposter syndrome can fundamentally change the way you approach growth, ambition, and leadership. This episode is for anyone who has ever  questioned whether they truly belong in the room, felt relief after success instead of pride, assumed confidence should come before responsibility or wondered why self-doubt intensifies just as their career progresses.   Rather than offering platitudes or surface-level motivation, this episode invites a deeper understanding of self-doubt - when to listen to it, when to challenge it, and when its absence might be a signal to re-evaluate whether you’re still stretching yourself. ⏱ Episode Chapters 00:00 – The Corporate Confidence Gap 01:17 – Why High Performers Feel Self-Doubt 01:38 – Your Brain on Uncertainty 03:00 – Survival Mode in Boardrooms 04:10 – High-Performance Culture & Comparison 05:00 – The Perfect Storm for Imposter Syndrome 05:40 – Identity Lag Explained 06:30 – The 5 Imposter Archetypes 07:20 – The 4 P’s: Perfectionism, Procrastination, Paralysis, People-Pleasing 08:20 – Reframing Doubt as Growth 09:28 – Practical Tools to Manage Self-Doubt 10:00 – Keep a “Confidence File” 10:30 – Act First, Confidence Follows 11:00 – Updating Your Professional Identity 11:30 – Walking With Fear, Not Fighting It ------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------- About The Escalation Podcast   The Escalation Podcast blends thoughtful solo reflections with in-depth conversations with high-performing leaders across banking, finance, law, consulting, and the wider corporate world.   Each episode explores the psychology, culture, and unspoken dynamics of ambitious careers offering insight into how professionals navigate pressure, identity, and success at the highest levels.

On this week's episode of The Escalation Podcast, I’m joined by Gabino Roche Jr., CEO and Founder of Saphyre — a true visionary and fintech innovator, transforming how global financial institutions connect, trade, and share data.   With over twenty years of experience at the intersection of finance and technology, Gabino’s journey spans senior leadership roles at the NYSE, J.P. Morgan, and McKinsey & Company.    In 2017, he founded Saphyre to tackle one of Wall Street’s most persistent challenges — the inefficiency and duplication in client onboarding and pre-trade processes.   Today, Saphyre's revolutionary AI-powered technology provides solutions to some of the world’s largest financial institutions, helping them achieve real-time readiness and transforming how markets operate.    And the most exciting part? It feels like they're only just getting started!   In this conversation, we unpack the future of fintech innovation, what it takes to build products that truly transform the traditional system, and how to turn deep industry insight into global impact with a team that is led by pure vision.   A huge thank you to Gabino Roche Jr. for this incredible conversation — and for your time, honesty and insight. Your vision for Saphyre, leadership, and transformation in the banking and finance industry is truly inspiring.      Get to know Gabino Roche Gabino is the Founder and CEO of Saphyre with over 20 years of experience building products for Fortune 500 companies. He previously served as Managing Director at the NYSE and Senior Vice President at JPMorgan, where he led a $40M custody portfolio and modernized KYC/AML operations. He has also held leadership roles at McKinsey and Clarient Global, managing large-scale fintech initiatives backed by major global banks.   Connect with him: Website: https://www.saphyre.com/ Linkedin: https://www.linkedin.com/in/gabinoroche/     ⏱ Episode Chapters 00:00 – Intro: Meet Gabino Roche (Sapphire CEO) 01:00 – What Sapphire Actually Does 02:00 – Why Finance? Early Inspiration 05:30 – McKinsey & Product Thinking 07:00 – NYSE During the 2008 Crisis 09:00 – JP Morgan, KYC & Industry Gaps 12:00 – Why Finance Still Reconciles Data 15:00 – Founding Sapphire & Early Lessons 21:00 – Selling to Big Banks 29:00 – AI in Finance: What Actually Works 34:30 – The Breakthrough Moment (2018) 36:00 – Handling Escalations as CEO 38:00 – Resilience, Faith & Leadership 41:00 – The “Quest” Mindset & Closing  

We shape-shift daily. It's almost a reflex - an on-demand habit we've been building and perfecting over the years. As we grow, so do the expectations. And in our industry that growth, that constant climb, is the game.   The better we get at it—chasing the next promotion, collecting new titles—the more eyes are on us. We crave admiration and recognition, but with that often comes exposure and judgment.   Welcome to The Escalation Podcast – where we talk about the reality of working in the banking and finance industry through the lenses of real people. In our opening episode, we’re going back to where it all started – before the titles and identity edits.   ⏱ Episode Chapters 00:00 – The corporate ladder & identity shifts 01:00 – Welcome to The Escalation Podcast 01:40 – The origin of “escalation” (Latin scala) 02:20 – Lyndon B. Johnson & the Vietnam-era shift 03:00 – Escalation as banking protocol 04:30 – The psychology of “urgent” emails 05:00 – Lessons from Credit Suisse 06:00 – Escalation of commitment & ego 07:00 – A new perspective after corporate life 08:00 – Why no one teaches escalation strategy 10:20 – Cultural silence & The Big Short 10:40 – Quote from Warren Buffett 11:00 – What to expect in Season 1