Making Love: A Podcast with Sarah Rose Bright

In this episode, Graeme and I talk about penetration, specifically penis-vagina penetration with all its cultural and personal histories.When we think of improving penetration, we think of trying new positions. We never consider other ways to explore. We go deep into what becomes possible when we bring real, embodied presence to penetration instead of rushing towards a goal.In this episode we explore:How most of us learned penetration as a mechanical act, not an intimate oneWhy letting go of the script and be uncomfortable and how to navigate those momentsChecking in before penetration, and why this simple practice can be so healingHow childhood wounding and old conditioning can show up in intimacy and how we've learned to navigate that togetherThe Taoist concept of "the way" - learning to listen and move with what's actually happening, rather than following a scriptHow to practice presence in the everydayConscious penetration as a healing pathway through peri / menopauseWhy arousal doesn't have to come first and how willingness and openness can be a doorway into intimacyThe Making Love scissors positionHow to play with subtletyHow penetration can be a practiceWhy women not orgasming through penetration says more about the style of sex we've learned than anything being ‘wrong’ with themPassion as fire and how it becomes a life-giving forceCheckout two other podcast episodes mentioned in this one:Episode 61 on sex and menopauseEpisode 68 on the pleasure of planned intimacyIf this piques your curiosity, join us for our Making Love Retreat for couples in Devon in October - a full week dedicated to exactly what we talk about in this episode, through embodiment practices, teaching, and practice time. There is space left for two couples.You can find out more here: https://sarahrosebright.com/making-love-retreats/Graeme Waterfield is a men’s coach who guides men into deeper presence, embodiment, and self-awareness. His sexual energy mastery training, blends meditation, Taoist principles, and nervous system awareness to transform sexual energy into love, vitality, and consciousness. Moving away from performance and intensity, his work emphasises relaxation, heart connection, and integrating sexuality into everyday life, helping men deepen intimacy, authenticity, and inner ease.Graeme and Sarah teach The Making Love Retreat®. Together they guide couples into deeper dimensions of intimacy, lovemaking, and conscious connection.RESOURCES FROM GRAEMETo explore Graeme's work in meditation, embodiment and sexual energy mastery for men, including courses, coaching, retreats and teachings, visit: https://www.graemewaterfield.comGraeme’s Sexual Energy Mastery Training for men - a training for men exploring meditation, embodied awareness and the deeper potential of sexual energy as a pathway into embodiment. This course starts April 14th, 2026 (though you can join up to April 21st).You can also find Graeme on Facebook.RESOURCES FROM SARAHThe Making Love Retreat for Couples, 12th - 18th October, 2026For free gifts for women and couples and to explore Sarah's work - including private coaching, group programmes, courses, retreats and her podcast - visit www.sarahrosebright.comABOUT YOUR HOSTSarah Rose Bright is an Erotic Embodiment and Intimacy Guide, authorised teacher of The Making Love Retreat®, and host of Making Love, a podcast on the evolution of love, sex, and relationships. She guides women and committed couples who feel stuck and unfulfilled in their intimate lives - and know this is the missing piece. Women come home to their bodies, awaken their desire, and reclaim their power. Couples create an erotic life of depth, passion, and love. Find out more: https://sarahrosebright.com/MUSIC: Trust and Surrender by Ayla Schafer. You can explore more of her beautiful music here - https://www.aylaschafer.co.uk/

Carly Mountain, psychotherapist, sex therapist, and author of Descent & Rising, joined Sarah to talk about her new book, Untamed Pleasure: Unleash Your True Erotic Nature.She shares that we weren't born tamed - we get trained into cages, that keep us from our own erotic nature. Carly's book offers twelve keys to find our way back out.In this conversation, Carly joins Sarah to explore what it really means to untame, they talk about the twelve keys and cages framework at the heart of her new book, what emerged from interviewing over sixty people aged 23 to 71 about their erotic lives, why creative transgression was the hardest chapter to write, and what midlife opens for women reclaiming Eros.Carly shares the "pleasure paradox," rewilding orgasm and what it looks like for couples to untame together, including taking penetration off the table as a gateway to deeper intimacy.What you’ll hear:Defining "untamed pleasure" - why not "wild," and the difference between returning to something innate versus learning something newThe twelve keys and cages framework: physical, mental, emotional, energetic, relational, soulfulCommunication as a "skeleton key" for every cageWhat over 60 interviews (ages 23–71) revealedWhat untaming brings up: grief, fear of family rejection and moreMidlife as a threshold for reclaiming ErosThe chapter she found hardest to write, and whyWhy midlife is such a specific threshold for reclaiming ErosThe "pleasure paradox" — why the road to pleasure isn't always pleasurableRewilding orgasm beyond quick and genital-onlyWhat it looks like for a couple to untame togetherIf you've ever felt like there's more available to you, more pleasure, more aliveness, more permission - this conversation is for you.Carly Mountain is a somatic psychotherapist, sex therapist, sacred space holder, breathworker and author of Descent & Rising: Women’s Stories & the Embodiment of the Inanna Myth and Untamed Pleasure: Unleash Your True Erotic Nature. She is passionate about facilitating people to reconnect with their inherent erotic aliveness, power and pleasure. She lives in Sheffield, England with her husband and two daughters.RESOURCES FROM CARLYhttps://carlymountain.com/Instagram https://www.instagram.com/carly_mountainFacebook Carly MountainSubstack https://substack.com/@carlymountainRESOURCES FROM SARAHThe Making Love Retreat for Couples, 12th - 18th October, 2026Visit www.sarahrosebright.comABOUT YOUR HOSTSarah Rose Bright is an Erotic Embodiment and Intimacy Guide, authorised teacher of The Making Love Retreat®, and host of Making Love, a podcast on the evolution of love, sex, and relationships. She guides women and committed couples who feel stuck and unfulfilled in their intimate lives - and know this is the missing piece. Women come home to their bodies, awaken their desire, and reclaim their power. Couples create an erotic life of depth, passion, and love. Find out more: https://sarahrosebright.com/MUSIC: Trust and Surrender by Ayla Schafer. You can explore more of her beautiful music here - https://www.aylaschafer.co.uk/

Dr. Stephania Sciamano spent a decade practicing as a naturopathic doctor before realising that lab results alone couldn't explain why so many of her female patients weren't getting better. Underneath the hormone imbalances, she kept finding the same pattern: stuck anger, old grief, and a guarded, combative relationship to men in general — not just romantically, but with fathers, brothers, bosses, and colleagues. In this conversation, Stephania and Sarah unpack what femininity really is (hint: it's not lipstick), why a woman's cortisol rhythm can reveal exactly how safe she feels around men, and how softening that guard changes both a woman's biology and her relationships. They talk candidly about control, letting a partner love you in his own way and his own timing, why women so often have to "go first" energetically, and what's really happening beneath the surface during perimenopause and menopause. The episode closes with a short guided heart-opening practice.What We Cover- Stephania's path from 10 years in family and women's medicine, through a five-year shamanic apprenticeship, to focusing on the relational root of hormonal imbalance- Why treating hormones numerically often doesn't make a woman feel better — and what she found underneath the numbers instead- The direct link between a woman's stance toward men and her cortisol rhythm, including the classic signs of a disrupted rhythm (can't get up in the morning, second wind at night)- Defining femininity as an embodied intelligence — intuition, sensing, cyclical rather than linear energy — versus femininity as costume- The Chinese medicine frame of yin and yang as it relates to feminine and masculine energy- The difference between "nice" as a performance and real softness with a clear boundary underneath it- How a woman's presence — not her words — is what actually sets a boundary- What changes in men when women soften: standing taller, wanting to protect and provide, feeling inspired to build- A real client story: a successful business owner whose husband felt unwanted, and the humbling realisation of how much he'd already been trying to give- Why women often can't receive help, and what shifts when they can- Linking emotional openness directly back to cortisol and progesterone- What men experience when women lead with warmth instead of combat — and why "watching him chop firewood" hits differently than "watching him lift weights"- Practical starting points: noticing what spikes your adrenaline about men, and noticing the old grudge (dad, an ex, a boss) that's still running the show- Why women often have to go first energetically in a relationship — and why that isn't the same as doing all the work- The pitfall of expecting a partner's personal growth to look identical to your own, or to move at your speed- What's really happening in perimenopause and menopause beneath the physical symptoms: energy moving from "up and out" to "down and in," a return to lineage and roots, and why it can look like a midlife crisis when it's closer to a soul evolution- A guided heart practice: bringing scattered energy back into the body, expanding the heart in all directions, filling it with love, and sending that love out into the world- Stephania's definition of love: the presence of choiceDr. Stephania Sciamano (Dr S) is a naturopathic doctor and spiritual mentor to ambitious women worldwide who seek the feminine way to health, wealth, and love with men. She brings a rare synthesis of clinical experience and esoteric depth to her work, and her lifestyle is devoted to the union of men and women, with God at the helm.RESOURCES FROM DR STEPHANIADr Stephania Sciamano's free masterclass, *The Sexy Hormone Morning Routine*, available when you sign up to her Substack — https://drstephaniasciamano.substack.com/https://stephaniasciamano.com/https://www.facebook.com/stephaniasciamanoRESOURCES FROM SARAHThe Making Love Retreat for Couples, 12th - 18th October, 2026https://sarahrosebright.com/making-love-retreats/For a free e-book, How Relaxed Love Making Can Transform Your Sex Life and to explore Sarah's work - including private coaching, group programmes, courses, retreats and her podcast - visit www.sarahrosebright.comABOUT YOUR HOSTSarah Rose Bright is an Erotic Embodiment and Intimacy Guide, authorised teacher of The Making Love Retreat®, and host of Making Love, a podcast on the evolution of love, sex, and relationships. She guides women and committed couples who feel stuck and unfulfilled in their intimate lives - and know this is the missing piece. Women come home to their bodies, awaken their desire, and reclaim their power. Couples create an erotic life of depth, passion, and love. Find out more: https://sarahrosebright.com/MUSIC: Trust and Surrender by Ayla Schafer. You can explore more of her beautiful music here - https://www.aylaschafer.co.uk/

In this solo episode, Sarah Rose Bright makes the case for one of the most resisted ideas in her practice - planning intimacy. Many couples believe that if sex isn't spontaneous, something is wrong - with them, their partner, or the relationship itself. Sarah unpacks why that belief is not only untrue, but very damaging, and shows how intentional time can make real spontaneity possible.Drawing on Emily Nagoski's work on spontaneous versus responsive desire, Sarah explains why so many women feel ‘broken’ for not experiencing desire instantly, and how understanding your own desire style can transform your intimate life. She shares practical tools for creating intentional intimacy into a relationship - from finding the right time of day to creating anticipation, how to transition from "go mode" into "slow mode," and having honest conversations about what each person needs in the moment.Sarah also explores how expanding the definition of intimacy beyond penetration can take the pressure off entirely, why practice time cultivates real erotic mastery, and how tracking your personal ‘brakes and accelerators’ can help you understand what supports and hinders your pleasure.One of the many reasons Graeme and Sarah love facilitating the Making Love Retreat® is that it offers a full week to explore creating intentional intimacy, and to see and experience the gifts and the magic that happen when you commit and devote time to each other.In this episode, you'll hear:How planned intimacy can enhance desire and connection, not kill itHow spontaneity can grow from intentional intimacyThe difference between responsive and spontaneous styles and how you are not ‘broken’ if you experience desire responsivelyCommunication as the foundation of understanding each other's needsHow experimenting with timing is key to intentional intimacyHow and why its important to consciously transition into intimacy time with practices and ritualsHow intimacy can be deeply fulfilling without leading to penetrationHow practice time helps you become a better loverHow curiosity and exploration are core for evolving your intimate lifeThe Making Love Retreat for Couples, 12th - 18th October, 2026For a free e-book, How Relaxed Love Making Can Transform Your Sex Life and to explore Sarah's work - including private coaching, group programmes, courses, retreats and her podcast - visit www.sarahrosebright.comYour podcast host is Sarah Rose Bright. Sarah Rose Bright is a Love, Sex & Intimacy Coach, an authorised teacher of The Making Love Retreats® and a Gene Keys Guide. She guides women and committed couples who feel stuck and unfulfilled in their intimate lives - and know this is the missing piece. Women return home to their body, awaken their sensuality and discover their true power. Couples transform sex into lovemaking, creating an erotic life filled with depth, passion, and love. Find out more: https://sarahrosebright.com/MUSIC: Trust and Surrender by Ayla Schafer. You can explore more of her beautiful music here - https://www.aylaschafer.co.uk/

From her years of private practice and teaching, Sarah sees that being in the unknown is one of the most challenging things for people wanting to shift their sex lives, yet rarely talked about.It is the piece that, when embraced, opens up a whole new world of possibilities. Most of us learned sex as a script: a linear sequence with predictable stops along the way, repeated until it becomes routine.In this episode, Sarah explores what happens when we step off that script and into the unknown, and why that discomfort might be one of the most generative places in our erotic lives. Stepping off the script takes practise, which is why we host the Making Love Retreat in October to support you to safely lean into that curious exploration.This is about those micro moments where we don't know what to do, or where we find ourselves repeating the same things on autopilot.She unpacks how the pressure to perform, please, and follow a predictable path keeps us from noticing what's actually happening in our bodies, and why the same curiosity we'd bring to changing up our diet or exercise routine can transform our sex lives too.In this episode you'll hear:Why the scripts we learn around sex are so limiting, and how to start questioning themThe role of curiosity, awareness, and practice in expanding pleasure and connectionHow performance pressure shows up in the bedroom and what helps release itWhy practice time, free from the pressure to "finish" a certain way, changes everythingStories from client work showing how the smallest moments create the biggest shiftsThe myth that good sex must end in a particular way, and what becomes possible without itWhy ‘messy learning’ might be exactly what your erotic life needsThrough stories, Sarah shows how a pause, a breath, or naming a flicker of stress out loud can shift an entire dynamic. As she puts it, your erotic life is ever evolving, and rather than adding more, letting go of conditioning is what allows you to drop in deeper.RESOURCES FROM SARAH The Making Love Retreat for Couples, 12th - 18th October, 2026ABOUT YOUR HOSTYour podcast host is Sarah Rose Bright. Sarah Rose Bright is a Love, Sex & Intimacy Coach, an authorised teacher of The Making Love Retreats® and a Gene Keys Guide. She guides women and committed couples who feel stuck and unfulfilled in their intimate lives - and know this is the missing piece. Women return home to their body, awaken their sensuality and discover their true power. Couples transform sex into lovemaking, creating an erotic life filled with depth, passion, and love. Find out more: https://sarahrosebright.com/MUSIC: Trust and Surrender by Ayla Schafer. You can explore more of her beautiful music here - https://www.aylaschafer.co.uk/