Friends Keep Secrets

Today we are taking on the very important task of trying to find love for Benny’s mom, Sandy. We scoured Los Angeles for the cream of the crop, the very best single men over the age of 55 in this city. These are not actors. These are men. Men looking for love. And we have to say, we were blown away by this group of men. As for Sandy, she’s looking for someone responsible, smart, has a sense of humor, dedicated, loyal, and kind. Tall would be nice, but they don’t have to be tall. She wants a best friend. Someone to spend her time with. And maybe there’s a world where a man walks through the door and it’s just love at first sight. Honestly, him being able to walk at all is apparently a very strong selling point in Sandy’s book. In this episode eleven men come over, Sandy meets every single one of them, and we do everything in our power to let a love bloom. At the end of the day, it’s really just about human connection. Thanks for watching us try to find Benny’s mom a best friend. We respect you!   What happens:0:00 waiting for the men 2:08 teaser 2:29 the beautiful sandy 3:09 sandy's dream man 4:27 sandy's potential suitors 5:01 what sandy is looking for 6:31 sandy's dating history 8:00 preparing to bring out the men 8:39 bring out the men 9:17 meet the bachelors 13:29 speed dating begins 15:46 choosing the finalists 17:26 the sunflower ceremony 18:55 sandy's first 1-on-1 date 21:41 staying active as you get older 25:33 sandy's current dating life 26:18 sandy's second 1-on-1 date 26:48 photography 28:58 cooking & food 30:30 family & getting older 33:09 sandy's third 1-on-1 date 33:48 dating after divorce 35:08 experiencing life 36:09 favorite books & movies 37:27 comfort in silence 38:57 the boomerang penis 39:31 sandy's fourth 1-on-1 date 40:23 dating in LA 40:51 past relationships 42:10 clive's pasta sauce 43:33 a world of brilliance 46:43 sandy's final decision Show socials: https://www.instagram.com/friendskeepsecrets https://www.tiktok.com/@friendskeepsecrets https://www.x.com/FKSpodcast https://www.facebook.com/FriendsKeepSecrets/ https://friendskeepsecrets.com Hosts socials: www.youtube.com/@bennyblanco https://www.youtube.com/LilDickyRap https://www.instagram.com/itsbennyblanco/ https://www.instagram.com/lildickygram https://www.tiktok.com/@itsbennyblanco https://www.tiktok.com/@lildicky https://x.com/ItsBennyBlanco https://x.com/lildickytweets?lang=en https://www.facebook.com/itsbennyblanco/ https://www.facebook.com/LilDickyRap   Helix Sleep makes premium mattresses and bedding that are customized to fit your personal needs, and conveniently shipped to your door. Go to helixsleep.com/FKS for 20% off site wide. Willie's is the #1 Green Infused Beverage in the US with over 350,000 happy customers and 1M+ bottles sold. Order now at drinkwillies.com and use code FKS for 20% off your first order plus free shipping on orders over $95. Or use the store locator to find Willie's on shelves near you, like your local Total Wine store.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Gwyneth Paltrow came over today and it turns out we have a lot of Gwyneth Paltrow-related questions. This is the woman who introduced the world to yoni steaming and conscious uncoupling. A woman whose impact on culture is so specific, and so memorable, that we actually spent $600 of our own money to acquire a discontinued vagina candle on the black market. Today Gwyneth answers all of our most burning questions: Why’d she start Goop? Did she start the weird celebrity baby name trend? And why can’t Dave get the caesar dressing placed directly inside his Goop chicken caesar salad wraps? To be clear, he’s nitpicking only because he’s so passionate about the brand. In fact, Dave is such a genuine Goop fan that he was already eating it before Gwyneth arrived, but wants all of you to know this is not an ad, even though Benny is apparently a Goop investor, which does feel like a minor conflict of interest on some level. Anyways, thanks for watching! We respect you!   What happens: 0:00 cometh gwyneth 1:52 hereth gwyneth 2:21 kristin & dave fell in love in this house 3:44 selena & benny's wedding 4:27 hey why's it called goop 6:53 starting the interesting celebrity baby name trend 7:52 dave's robot delivery experience 8:40 dave's one problem with goop 11:30 gwyneth realizes who dave is 12:39 favorite restaurants 17:40 NY food vs LA food 20:02 blending families 22:52 conscious uncoupling 26:42 gwyneth's parenting style 28:17 raising kids as a celebrity parent 29:37 dave's peeping tom experience 32:18 born with penis issues 35:43 hypospadias 38:45 yoni steaming 40:36 $600 vagina candle 45:21 dating brad pitt 51:08 public breakups 53:09 criticism & misperception 59:32 anxiety 1:01:31 does gwyneth smoke weed or drink 1:02:55 best treatments once you're in your 30s 1:03:49 fully goopified   Show socials: https://www.instagram.com/friendskeepsecrets https://www.tiktok.com/@friendskeepsecrets https://www.x.com/FKSpodcast https://www.facebook.com/FriendsKeepSecrets/ https://friendskeepsecrets.com   Hosts socials: www.youtube.com/@bennyblanco https://www.youtube.com/LilDickyRap https://www.instagram.com/itsbennyblanco/ https://www.instagram.com/lildickygram https://www.tiktok.com/@itsbennyblanco https://www.tiktok.com/@lildicky https://x.com/ItsBennyBlanco https://x.com/lildickytweets?lang=en https://www.facebook.com/itsbennyblanco/ https://www.facebook.com/LilDickyRap   Download Cash App Today: https://click.cash.app/ui6m/jspqdlgd #CashAppPod Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Cash App Visa® Debit Flex Cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC, and The Bancorp Bank, N.A., pursuant to a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. See terms and conditions for the Sutton prepaid card, Sutton debit flex card, and Bancorp debit flex card. Discounts and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.   Thank you White Claw for sponsoring this episode: 21+ onlySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You might know Julia Louis-Dreyfus from Seinfeld. You might know her from Veep. You might know her just by knowing her. To be fully honest with you, we were all a little nervous today because of how important this woman is to our lives. For Benny, watching Seinfeld was a religious experience every week. He used to have a dog named Larry David. Kristin used to watch Elaine every day for confidence. Dave is actually from the Seinfeld coaching tree of comedy. So really, even this show you're watching right now would not be what it is without Seinfeld existing. And one of the biggest inspirations for us was trying to capture that feeling of a group of friends just hanging out. Well, today Julia comes over and does exactly that with the three of us, and what can you say about that except it's an honor. We were all very starstruck but we think we mostly held it together. We love Julia! Boy are we thankful she came. Thanks for watching us hang out with one of our comedy idols. We respect you! What happens:0:00 intro 0:26 how we start it 1:11 julia arrives 1:41 dave's elaine portrait 2:17 keeping the wardrobe from your show 2:53 the second shirt button 3:22 what age do we seem like 4:15 telling your wife she's beautiful 4:42 watching seinfeld every day for confidence 5:21 benny's seinfeld constipation story 8:08 climbing the mountain 8:35 how women in comedy have changed 9:02 the seinfeld coaching tree of comedy 9:34 julia's review of "dave" 9:55 getting cast on seinfeld 12:26 did julia know seinfeld would be huge 13:03 this show wouldn't exist without seinfeld 13:56 sauce argument round two 17:27 have julia's kids ever made a sauce 18:14 julia is stunning and stylish 19:09 social media 19:44 becoming the most famous woman in america 20:18 friends vs. seinfeld 22:10 why didn't larry want to play george 23:05 what are the chances larry would do our show 23:19 does julia rewatch herself 24:42 married 38 years 25:07 scared kids are gonna rock our world 26:30 raising kids in LA 28:13 raising kids in the social media era 28:41 nursery on the set of seinfeld 32:03 raising two boys 33:01 what part of life is julia in 33:31 favorite desserts 34:06 getting through cancer 35:03 julia's work with the NRDC 35:45 questions about julia's name 37:00 favorite desserts part 2 38:09 working with james gandolfini 38:40 starstruck by mary tyler moore 40:13 lebron 40:39 julia's son playing d1 basketball 41:16 julia loves hiking 42:59 cooking 44:50 benny had a dog named larry david 46:16 is a dog a good segue into children 47:06 what can we steal from seinfeld 47:42 keeping up with the seinfeld cast 48:00 was there friction on seinfeld 48:16 filming in front of a live audience 50:05 were larry & jerry collaborative 50:56 the show about nothing   Show socials: https://www.instagram.com/friendskeepsecrets https://www.tiktok.com/@friendskeepsecrets https://www.x.com/FKSpodcast https://www.facebook.com/FriendsKeepSecrets/ https://friendskeepsecrets.com   Hosts socials: www.youtube.com/@bennyblanco https://www.youtube.com/LilDickyRap https://www.instagram.com/itsbennyblanco/ https://www.instagram.com/lildickygram https://www.tiktok.com/@itsbennyblanco https://www.tiktok.com/@lildicky https://x.com/ItsBennyBlanco https://x.com/lildickytweets?lang=en https://www.facebook.com/itsbennyblanco/ https://www.facebook.com/LilDickyRap   Thank you McDonald’s for sponsoring this episode. Thank you White Claw for sponsoring this episode: 21+ onlySee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

Bryan Johnson is the longevity man. He has spent years measuring basically everything there is to measure about his body in an attempt not to die, and now he's brought his partner Kate Tolo over to measure us. This is concerning because we have been living very differently than these people. Bryan doesn't drink, doesn't eat at restaurants, goes to bed extremely early and has a list of 200 things that kill you in life. Kristin would like to know if she can still have wine and eat ten pounds of strawberries. Dave would like to know if sex holds value. Benny would like to know if Bryan ever sees another health man coming up behind him and wants to sprinkle a little microplastic in his smoothie. Along the way we eat a full Bryan Johnson meal, hear what prompted Bryan’s viral “just had sex with Kate” tweet, and find out how old Dave’s brain is (although he did smoke a little bit of weed beforehand, so maybe take the results with a grain of salt). The more we learn, the harder it is not to respect what these two are doing. Bryan has basically made himself the test subject for the rest of humanity, and Kate has somehow taken this extremely complicated human and put him in a comfy, confident, warm place where he can do it all. Thanks for watching and try not to die!     What happens:0:00 benny’s nutty professor foot 0:57 teaser 1:20 brian & kate come over 1:49 maximizing for fun vs. maximizing for longevs 4:21 a crash course in changing your life 5:31 microdosing penis pills 6:59 measuring nighttime erections 7:35 bryan’s live-streamed psilocybin experience 12:19 why bryan does this 17:08 is immortality really possible 19:56 ridding your body of all microplastics 21:34 does sex hold value 24:29 dave has a great touch 25:47 nipple rumors 26:30 sexual speed 27:05 is bryan competitive with other longevity guys 28:15 brain measurement setup 30:34 measuring dave’s brain 32:05 200 things that kill you in life 34:49 do bryan & kate ever feel like giving up 35:57 bryan doesn’t eat food from restaurants 36:50 what if humanity gets wiped out first 37:38 how bryan & kate met 39:48 how kate created bryan’s brand 41:17 how bryan & kate got together 45:54 dave & kristin’s first kiss 46:33 bryan’s sweet demeanor 48:33 kate is a masterpiece of a human 49:07 bryan before kate vs. bryan after kate 50:07 bryan’s “I just had sex with kate” tweet 50:29 being recognized 51:43 did bryan's mormonism precondition his brain 52:18 benny's willpower 52:40 therapy 54:35 has bryan got a six-pack 54:52 what about laughter 56:11 dave's brain scan results 56:58 bryan's open-mindedness 57:48 the next generation of bryan johnsons 59:44 does bryan want a cheese puff 1:01:36 top 3 things bryan misses 1:02:38 bryan's haters 1:04:33 dave shows bryan & kate a video 1:07:02 video reactions 1:08:38 ten out of ten Show socials: https://www.instagram.com/friendskeepsecrets https://www.tiktok.com/@friendskeepsecrets https://www.x.com/FKSpodcast https://www.facebook.com/FriendsKeepSecrets/ https://friendskeepsecrets.com Hosts socials: www.youtube.com/@bennyblanco https://www.youtube.com/LilDickyRap https://www.instagram.com/itsbennyblanco/ https://www.instagram.com/lildickygram https://www.tiktok.com/@itsbennyblanco https://www.tiktok.com/@lildicky https://x.com/ItsBennyBlanco https://x.com/lildickytweets?lang=en https://www.facebook.com/itsbennyblanco/ https://www.facebook.com/LilDickyRap   Offered by FanDuel Prediction Markets LLC, a registered futures commission merchant. 18+. See terms at ⁠https://fanduel.com/predicts/bonus-offer-terms⁠   Download Cash App Today: ⁠https://click.cash.app/ui6m/jspqdlgd⁠ #CashAppPod Cash App is a financial services platform, not a bank. Banking services provided by Cash App’s bank partner(s). Prepaid debit cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC. Cash App Visa® Debit Flex Cards issued by Sutton Bank, Member FDIC, and The Bancorp Bank, N.A., pursuant to a license from Visa U.S.A. Inc. See terms and conditions for the Sutton prepaid card, Sutton debit flex card, and Bancorp debit flex card.  Discounts and promotions provided by Cash App, a Block, Inc. brand. Visit cash.app/legal/podcast for full disclosures.See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

You may know Jake Shane as an octopus reviewer. You may know him from his podcast & Netflix show Therapuss. And at least one internet commenter knows him as demon twink Labubu. Well, before today Dave had never met Jake and didn't know much about him or his past. But that’s all about to change. Before Jake leaves today, Dave will have tasted his first octopus tentacle, connected over the importance of “laying a base” before a big night out, and significantly expanded his understanding of modern gay sexual power dynamics. By the way, now that Jake is our actual friend we can personally attest that he is incredibly funny, cool, and very, very genuine, regardless of what that one internet commenter said. We also played rose and thorn. Thanks for watching! We respect you!    What happens: 0:00 intro 0:22 excited for shane 3:05 jake's here 3:33 hitting a pitch perfect note 3:55 jake's past with octopus 4:50 philly people 5:26 dave tastes his first tentacle 6:39 judging books by their covers 8:22 jake's dating life 9:12 dave wants to talk about being gay 10:37 top & bottom personalities 11:38 guess our sexual preferences 14:20 jake's dream man 15:15 the worst date jake had in LA 16:10 jake's best recent date 17:04 perfect man criteria 17:44 jake's double date 19:16 when jake interviewed selena 20:08 jake's dream guests 20:31 jake's confidence isn't real 21:20 are dave & benny sensitive 22:41 does jake read the comments 24:20 does benny watch himself 25:29 we're all gonna die 26:02 twink demon labubu 29:11 lebron, thank you 30:21 jake's perfect night out 35:04 jake's audition 36:48 jake's OCD 38:37 benny's OCD 43:10 adderall 44:12 dave's OCD 44:38 kristin's OCD 45:36 what color would jake say his hair is 48:53 vanity confessions 49:34 d**k made of nuts 50:32 roses & thorns & buds 53:31 actual friends   Show socials: https://www.instagram.com/friendskeepsecrets https://www.tiktok.com/@friendskeepsecrets https://www.x.com/FKSpodcast https://www.facebook.com/FriendsKeepSecrets/ https://friendskeepsecrets.com Hosts socials: www.youtube.com/@bennyblanco https://www.youtube.com/LilDickyRap https://www.instagram.com/itsbennyblanco/ https://www.instagram.com/lildickygram https://www.tiktok.com/@itsbennyblanco https://www.tiktok.com/@lildicky https://x.com/ItsBennyBlanco https://x.com/lildickytweets?lang=en https://www.facebook.com/itsbennyblanco/ https://www.facebook.com/LilDickyRapSee omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.