A Bit of Optimism

The internet is flooded with advice for dating in the smartphone age: know your type, trust the spark, watch for red flags, protect your peace, never settle. It sounds like self-respect, but relationship expert Amy Chan thinks it’s a big reason dating feels impossible right now. Her argument: we need to correct the lessons we’ve learned when it comes to dating. The person who’s great on a first date isn’t necessarily great at a relationship. Instant chemistry isn’t always a good sign. A red flag could just be an imperfection. And keeping our options open has made a lot of us genuinely bad at choosing someone. Amy is the founder of Renew Breakup Bootcamp and the author of Unsingle: How to Date Smarter and Create Love That Lasts. For nearly two decades she’s looked at dating through psychology and neuroscience — why we’re drawn to certain people, why relationships fall apart, and what actually predicts whether one lasts. She started her career helping people end relationships… Now, she teaches them how to build one. In this episode you'll learn: ➡️ Why “instant chemistry” is one of the worst predictors of a lasting relationship ➡️ The quiet qualities research says actually predict a happy partnership ➡️ Why dating skills and relationship skills are two completely different skill sets ➡️ How the algorithm rewards red-flag advice 10X over green-flag advice (and what that’s doing to you) ➡️ Situationships: why the breakup hurts more when there was never a breakup ➡️ “Leaky energy,” micro-cheating, and the honest test for both ➡️ The 9-date experiment Amy gives clients who are stuck dating the same person ➡️ How the right relationship shrinks old wounds  ➡️ Why discomfort is a critical skill dating requires Amy’s advice isn’t about finding a better person. It’s about becoming someone better at love. And that’s advice all of us could use!  This… is A Bit of Optimism. + + + This episode is brought to you by SAP. Bring it with SAP GROW. The AI Cloud ERP for any size business. Learn more at https://SAP.com/GROW + + + To get a copy of Amy's book, Unsingle: How to Date Smarter and Create Love That Lasts, head to: https://missamychan.com/#books  + + + Chapters Chapters 00:00:00 Why Modern Dating Advice Is Making Us Worse at Love 00:02:26 From Broken Heart to Breakup Bootcamp 00:09:50 Why Dating Feels Harder Than Ever 00:11:35 The Two Different Skill Sets: Dating vs. Relationship 00:12:26 Online Dating and the Imagination Problem 00:14:17 The Coffee Date Defense and the "Five Out of Ten Rule" 00:15:53 The Cure for Avoidant Attachment 00:18:13 The ADHD Love Bomb Confession 00:24:49 What Self-Care Culture Gets Wrong About Commitment 00:30:31 Situationships: The Safe Space That Keeps You Stuck 00:33:07 Leaky Energy and Micro-Cheating 00:35:08 Amy's Seven-Year Relationship and Emotionally Corrective Experiences 00:39:28 The Instant Chemistry Trap 00:40:59 The Nine-Person Dating Experiment 00:44:37 Why Young People Aren't Dating Anymore 00:45:49 Bad Feelings Don't Mean It's Bad 00:48:02 The Single Skill That Saves Relationships + + + Simon is an unshakable optimist. He believes in a bright future and our ability to build it together. Described as “a visionary thinker with a rare intellect,” Simon has devoted his professional life to help advance a vision of the world that does not yet exist; a world in which the vast majority of people wake up every single morning inspired, feel safe wherever they are and end the day fulfilled by the work that they do. Simon is the author of multiple best-selling books including Start With Why, Leaders Eat Last, Together is Better, and The Infinite Game. + + + Website: http://simonsinek.com/ Leaderful: https://simonsinek.com/leaderful Podcast: http://apple.co/simonsinek Instagram: https://instagram.com/simonsinek/ Linkedin: https://linkedin.com/in/simonsinek/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/simonsinek Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/simonsinek

Have you ever sat through a presentation and felt your attention just start to…drift? Chances are, it wasn't the content. It was the delivery. A year ago, Rob Willis was a corporate trainer with years of experience and a sharp eye for what makes people listen. He wondered if what he taught in workshops would resonate with a larger audience. So he started making short videos that break down what makes great speakers great: from their word choice, to structure, to the energy they brought to any room or conversation.  Rob even made a video breaking down my method of public speaking. In his video,  Rob dissects my signature opening line, and my friends couldn't stop sending it to me. One hundred videos in one hundred days later, Rob's videos are going viral on a regular basis, and a whole new audience is eager to learn from him. But what I find most interesting about Rob is where he actually learned all of this. Not in a classroom. He learned it by giving free walking tours in Berlin, where nobody pays up front and anyone can leave at any moment. If you're boring, people simply walk away — no tip, no small talk, just people voting with their feet. Rob and I discuss what that taught him about holding a room, why the smartest person in the room is rarely the most persuasive one, and the handful of simple, almost mechanical shifts that separate a forgettable pitch from one people actually remember. In this episode you'll learn: ➡️ Why "if I just explain it better" is the most common, and most inaccurate, assumption speakers make ➡️ Rob's trick for holding anyone's attention, whether it's a boardroom or a crowd on a street corner ➡️ What real charisma is made of (hint: it's not confidence, it's belief) ➡️ Why so many people suddenly sound fake the moment they step on stage ➡️ 5 things you can do in your next meeting to immediately present better  You don't need a TED Talk on your calendar to get something out of this one. Any of us who wants to be understood — in a meeting, a pitch, a hard conversation — will find something worth stealing. This… is A Bit of Optimism. + + + This episode is brought to you by SAP. Bring it with SAP GROW. The AI Cloud ERP for any size business. Learn more at https://SAP.com/GROW + + + Want to keep up with Rob and his video breakdowns? Check out: https://robdwillis.carrd.co/ + + + Chapters Chapters 00:00:00 The Former Tour Guide Who Cracked the Code 00:03:12 Why Trying to Sound Smart is Losing You the Room 00:03:48 100 Videos in 100 Days 00:06:16 Breaking Down the Patterns: What Makes Simon Sinek Work 00:07:33 Learning to Speak Without a Plan 00:11:41 The Knowledge Deficit Trap: Why More Information Doesn't Always Work 00:12:33 The Tour Guide Philosophy and Tracking What Actually Works 00:16:20 Simon's Book Writing Journey 00:23:10 The Art of the Distilled Message 00:25:53 The Bolt of Lightning Myth: How Great Ideas Really Happen 00:26:55 Let Them Get There First: The Power of the Aha Moment 00:29:10 Hans Rosling and What is True Charisma 00:31:47 Speaking With Conviction, Not Questions 00:34:30 The Speaking Voice Trap: Why You Sound Weird on Stage 00:36:42 Five Things You Can Do Tomorrow to Become a Better Speaker 00:44:14 The Five-Minute Rule: Why Less is Always More + + + Simon is an unshakable optimist. He believes in a bright future and our ability to build it together. Described as “a visionary thinker with a rare intellect,” Simon has devoted his professional life to help advance a vision of the world that does not yet exist; a world in which the vast majority of people wake up every single morning inspired, feel safe wherever they are and end the day fulfilled by the work that they do. Simon is the author of multiple best-selling books including Start With Why, Leaders Eat Last, Together is Better, and The Infinite Game. + + + Website: http://simonsinek.com/ Leaderful: https://simonsinek.com/leaderful Podcast: http://apple.co/simonsinek Instagram: https://instagram.com/simonsinek/ Linkedin: https://linkedin.com/in/simonsinek/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/simonsinek Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/simonsinek + + +

This might sound familiar: you read a full page, get to the bottom, and realize you absorbed none of it. There's a stack of books beside your bed you fully intend to finish. And the only phone number you can remember is your own. Jim Kwik says none of that means something is wrong with our brains. It’s that we were taught what to learn, but rarely ever taught how to learn. Jim would know. A well-meaning teacher called him "the boy with the broken brain" when he was nine, and for years he believed it. He's spent the three decades since proving otherwise — as a top brain coach, a leading expert on memory and accelerated learning, and the bestselling author of Limitless. His new book, Limitless Daily, offers 366 daily upgrades to help you focus, remember, and think better. In this episode you'll learn: ➡️ Why reading faster can actually improve comprehension ➡️ The free technique that stops your mind wandering mid-page ➡️ How to prompt your own brain the way you prompt AI ➡️ What your "dominant question" reveals about your personality ➡️ Why school teaches us what to learn but never how to learn ➡️ What digital dementia is + how to spot it in yourself ➡️ Why focus is a muscle, not a personality trait ➡️ The one thing AI will never be able to do for you I asked Jim an entirely selfish question about how to actually get through the unread books next to my bed, and got an answer that goes far beyond discipline. Jim explains why the technology making us more capable is quietly making us less able.  And by the end, we landed somewhere neither of us expected: AI could have given Jim every piece of advice that changed his life, word for word. But it wasn't the advice that changed him. It was that a living, breathing person cared enough to give it. This… is A Bit of Optimism. + + + This episode is brought to you by SAP. Bring it with SAP GROW. The AI Cloud ERP for any size business. Learn more at https://SAP.com/GROW + + + If you want to buy Jim’s new book, Limitless Daily, head to: https://limitlessdaily.com  Want to check out Jim’s other work like his best-selling book Limitless? Go to: https://jimkwik.com  + + + Chapters Chapters 00:00:00 The Boy With the Broken Brain: When Labels Become Limits 00:00:25 The Power of Adult Words on Children 00:06:51 The Freshman English Failure: Rock Bottom Before the Breakthrough 00:09:54 The Breaking Point: Collapsing in the Library 00:14:26 The Intervention: A Mentor Who Saw Potential, Not Limits 00:15:16 Accidental Careers: When Your Work Becomes Service to Others 00:20:48 110 People Showed Up: The Accidental Beginning of a Career 00:25:02 30 Books in 30 Days: The Student Who Saved Her Mother's Life 00:26:19 Service Over Success: Why Purpose Matters More Than Profit 00:31:31 Grow Givers vs Go Getters: Growing So You Have More to Give 00:32:23 Why Smart People Can't Finish Books 00:34:24 Your Brain Is Bored, Not Broken 00:38:49 The Visual Pacer Hack That Changes Everything 00:40:23 Ask Better Questions: How to Prime Your Brain for Learning 00:44:55 Focus Is a Muscle: Training Attention in the Age of AI 00:46:00 Why AI Will Never Replace Bedside Manner 00:49:11 It Was Never About the Information, It Was The Power of Being Seen + + + Simon is an unshakable optimist. He believes in a bright future and our ability to build it together. Described as “a visionary thinker with a rare intellect,” Simon has devoted his professional life to help advance a vision of the world that does not yet exist; a world in which the vast majority of people wake up every single morning inspired, feel safe wherever they are and end the day fulfilled by the work that they do. Simon is the author of multiple best-selling books including Start With Why, Leaders Eat Last, Together is Better, and The Infinite Game. + + + Website: http://simonsinek.com/ Leaderful: https://simonsinek.com/leaderful Podcast: http://apple.co/simonsinek Instagram: https://instagram.com/simonsinek/ Linkedin: https://linkedin.com/in/simonsinek/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/simonsinek Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/simonsinek + + +

Maybe this sounds familiar: you finally get the opportunity you've been waiting for, and the voice in your head says, "I'm not ready, I don't belong here."  Now imagine hearing that voice with millions of people watching. Mary Holland Nader has lived it. She never dreamed of fame, but when Hulu's reality series Love Thy Nader came knocking, she traded her secure Wall Street job for the spotlight and put her new platform to work. It allowed her to launch Mary & Pip, a purpose-driven fintech company that takes a wellness approach to money, demystifying finance for those of us it usually makes feel dumb. She also brings that expertise to her new podcast, Growing Interest (where I was lucky to be among her first guests). On the show, Mary Holland lets us join every step of her founder’s journey… even when it’s messy. Because she never wanted to be famous, but now that she is, she’s realized fame is leverage. And Mary Holland's committed to using hers to help and inspire others. In this episode you'll learn: ➡️ How to survive a 180-degree life pivot ➡️ Why your gut doesn't tell you what to do — it checks your values ➡️ The "corny" morning ritual that transformed Mary Holland's confidence ➡️ How to stop making your doubts your identity (with one simple grammar change) ➡️ The difference between being nice and being kind — and why feedback is kind ➡️ The 2 questions every founder should ask before raising money  ➡️ Why Simon gives his time to supporters instead of critics ➡️ The "reluctant sellout" + how financial stability protects your values ➡️ How to introduce yourself when you're more than one job title Mary Holland is a new breed of entrepreneur — proof of what happens when you use your platform for something bigger than yourself. She stopped waiting for confidence to arrive and decided to build it… in front of everyone. This… is A Bit of Optimism. + + + This episode is brought to you by SAP. Bring it with SAP GROW. The AI Cloud ERP for any size business. Learn more at https://SAP.com/GROW + + + Tune in to Mary Holland’s new podcast, Growing Interest, and you might just see Simon as a guest. Improve your financial wellness with Mary & Pip. Head to: https://www.maryandpip.com Want to keep up with Mary Holland and her sisters? Check out Love Thy Nader on Hulu: https://www.hulu.com/series/love-thy-nader  + + + Chapters Chapters 00:00:00 From Wall Street to Reality TV: Using Fame as a Tool for Good 00:02:57 Growing Up in the Bayou: Four Sisters and a Pet Alligator 00:07:19 Why Finance? Growing Up With Money Anxiety 00:08:25 Meeting Jimmy Kimmel's Agent: The Accidental Origin Story 00:10:29 Quitting Wall Street for Reality TV 00:12:58 Why Finance Makes Everyone Feel Stupid 00:14:14 Mary and Pip: Translating Finance for Real People 00:17:23 Becoming Confident on Camera: From Mortified to Vulnerable 00:25:22 The Power of Positive Self-Talk: Mirror Affirmations That Actually Work 00:28:31 Trust Your Gut: When Smart People Give You Bad Advice 00:30:09 What Does A Mentor Actually Look Like? 00:33:27 Gazelles Get Eaten: Why Hypergrowth Isn't Always Good 00:42:24 Spears: The Feedback Technique That Changed Everything 00:45:32 Correcting Language That Creates False Narratives 00:54:02 The Reluctant Sellout: When Freelancers Are Forced to Compromise 00:56:02 You're Not a Founder, You're an Inviter: Finding Your True Identity + + + Simon is an unshakable optimist. He believes in a bright future and our ability to build it together. Described as “a visionary thinker with a rare intellect,” Simon has devoted his professional life to help advance a vision of the world that does not yet exist; a world in which the vast majority of people wake up every single morning inspired, feel safe wherever they are and end the day fulfilled by the work that they do. Simon is the author of multiple best-selling books including Start With Why, Leaders Eat Last, Together is Better, and The Infinite Game. + + + Website: http://simonsinek.com/ Leaderful: https://simonsinek.com/leaderful Podcast: http://apple.co/simonsinek Instagram: https://instagram.com/simonsinek/ Linkedin: https://linkedin.com/in/simonsinek/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/simonsinek Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/simonsinek

Maybe you know the feeling: everyone around you seems to be getting ahead, and every hour you spend on something "frivolous" — the hobby, the detour, the game on a Sunday afternoon — feels like falling behind.  Brendan Hunt's career is proof those hours are never wasted. The detour turned out to be the path all along. Most of us know Brendan as Coach Beard and as the Emmy Award-winning co-creator of Ted Lasso. But before any of that, he was an unknown Chicago improv actor when the Amsterdam comedy institution Boom Chicago offered him something different. He moved to Amsterdam for a year… that turned into five… and he joined an alumni roster that now includes comedians like Seth Meyers, Jordan Peele, Amber Ruffin, and Jason Sudeikis.  Brendan performed every night, fell head over heels for soccer ("a soccer missionary for all Americans," as he puts it), and struck up a friendship with Jason Sudeikis. Years later, all of it collided into one of the most beloved shows on television, Ted Lasso, which is back for Season 4 on Apple TV+. Brendan has also returned to his first love, the stage, with his solo show The Movement You Need. In this conversation, Brendan and I trace the wildly unplanned path from Chicago to Amsterdam to AFC Richmond… and land on a different way to think about ambition: master the craft in front of you, and let the plan catch up later. In this episode you'll learn: ➡️ The real origin story of Ted Lasso (it began as a YouTube-only commercial written by a pool)  ➡️ Why Coach Beard barely talks + the improv rule that explains everything he does  ➡️ The "Beatles in Hamburg" secret to mastering any craft  ➡️ Why stepping away won't put you behind (everything will be exactly where you left it)  ➡️ How "wasting" Sundays watching Dutch soccer created the Lasso–Beard dynamic  ➡️ The surprising origin of the BELIEVE sign + who it was designed to annoy  ➡️ Why the flip side of belief is trust + and how it shapes Season 4 We spend so much of our lives protecting the plan. Brendan's story is a reminder that the things worth protecting are usually the ones we never planned for at all. This… is A Bit of Optimism. + + + This episode is brought to you by SAP. Bring it with SAP GROW. The AI Cloud ERP for any size business. Learn more at https://SAP.com/GROW + + + Check out Brendan as Coach Beard on season 4 of Ted Lasso on Apple TV+: https://tv.apple.com/us/show/ted-lasso  If you want to learn more about Brendan’s solo show, The Movement You Need, head to: https://themovementyouneed.com  + + + Chapters Chapters 00:00:00 Plans vs. Imagination: The Risk of Staying Safe 00:02:43 From Chicago to Amsterdam: The Audition That Changed Everything 00:07:02 The Boom Chicago Pitch: When Amsterdam Became Irresistible 00:11:58 The Beatles in Hamburg: Getting Your 10,000 Hours 00:16:18 The Joy of the Thing: Why Not Thinking About Your Career Makes You Better 00:20:01 Real Opportunity vs. Your Imagination: Why People Stay Put 00:20:58 Strong Opinions, Loosely Held: The Art of the Flexible Plan 00:21:28 Curiosity as Currency: The Jack of All Trades Philosophy 00:22:51 The Ted Lasso Origin Story: A Pool, Some Bits, and a Name 00:25:45 The Soccer Missionary: How Amsterdam Made Brendan the Beard to Ted's Lasso 00:27:31 Everything Contributes to Everything: The Payoff of Wasted Time 00:30:31 Midwestern Chipperness Meets British Stiff Upper Lip: The Culture Clash of Ted Lasso 00:32:57 Diagnosed as Ted Lasso: When Your Company Is the Character 00:33:46 Bringing Yourself to the Character: Acting as Being, Not Becoming 00:37:23 Coach Beard Was a Placeholder: How a Play Gave Him a Name 00:44:06 The Art Couple: The Play Brendan Wishes He Could Do Forever 00:46:33 The 1986 NFC Championship: A Pure Childhood Memory 00:54:07 When Comedy Became a Need: Making Mom Laugh 00:55:59 Season Four: Belief, Trust, and Starting Over 00:57:28 Don't Pick Sides: The Gift of Knowing Your Own Mistakes 00:59:04 The Purity of Art: Why Brendan Keeps Writing + + + Website: http://simonsinek.com Leaderful: https://simonsinek.com/leaderful Podcast: http://apple.co/simonsinek Instagram: https://instagram.com/simonsinek Linkedin: https://linkedin.com/in/simonsinek Twitter: https://twitter.com/simonsinek Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/simonsinek + + +