Claim OwnershipA Brave Journey: Reclaiming Your Identity After 40
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You played the game, followed the rules, and put everyone else in front of yourself… and then numbed out on autopilot just to get through it all - am I right?
And you STILL got kicked in the teeth, left empty-handed, without the promised prize in the box. Right again?
Well, screw that! Those rules? That game? Those expectations of others? They are completely made up by someone who didn't ask YOUR opinion - and they just don’t actually apply (or work!) to get you what you really want and deserve.
If you…
✨ are a woman in her 40s, 50s, or beyond who feels squished into a life that no longer fits or suits you
✨ are tired of trying to live up to the rules and standards that the outside world seems to judge you by
✨ have dreams and goals that make you feel giddy, but you hide them away because you don’t think they’re possible or that you deserve them
✨ feel alone or misunderstood and crave finding someone who “gets it”
✨ have a sense that something is out of alignment or just plain not working in your current life state
✨ want more or different but have no idea how to move towards it - or worse yet, aren't even sure you’re "allowed" to do things differently
✨ have an idea or inkling that you’re not living authentically - or are just going through the motions - and the dividends have become less and less satisfying
✨ find yourself wondering if this is all there is – if perhaps settling for mediocre is what happens to everyone
✨ have always felt that you needed to HAVE more (degrees, experience, money, physical characteristics, etc.) to BE who you want to be.
✨ are angry that being the "good" or "dutiful" or even "masculine" woman didn't have the payoff that was promised
There is a better way! When you can change your mind, you change your life.
A Brave Journey is my way to help midlife women explore ideas and concepts to help them start re-evaluating those legacy beliefs and identity stories they’ve been lugging around for decades.
It’s time to figure out how to try new things without the fear of failure or embarrassment, travel and feed your curiosity, have work and activities that you love and make you feel whole and of value, feel confident in taking exhilarating risks and experimenting, and to feel a sense of comfort, power, and safety from within yourself (rather than as provided with price tags from some external source).
I share my experiences and observations as a solo world traveler, interview interesting and inspiring people who share their own transformation stories that often began right where you are today, and dig into many of the actual fears, judgments, mental blocks, and challenges that we all face when we try to do right by ourselves and must go against the grain or norm to do so.
And you STILL got kicked in the teeth, left empty-handed, without the promised prize in the box. Right again?
Well, screw that! Those rules? That game? Those expectations of others? They are completely made up by someone who didn't ask YOUR opinion - and they just don’t actually apply (or work!) to get you what you really want and deserve.
If you…
✨ are a woman in her 40s, 50s, or beyond who feels squished into a life that no longer fits or suits you
✨ are tired of trying to live up to the rules and standards that the outside world seems to judge you by
✨ have dreams and goals that make you feel giddy, but you hide them away because you don’t think they’re possible or that you deserve them
✨ feel alone or misunderstood and crave finding someone who “gets it”
✨ have a sense that something is out of alignment or just plain not working in your current life state
✨ want more or different but have no idea how to move towards it - or worse yet, aren't even sure you’re "allowed" to do things differently
✨ have an idea or inkling that you’re not living authentically - or are just going through the motions - and the dividends have become less and less satisfying
✨ find yourself wondering if this is all there is – if perhaps settling for mediocre is what happens to everyone
✨ have always felt that you needed to HAVE more (degrees, experience, money, physical characteristics, etc.) to BE who you want to be.
✨ are angry that being the "good" or "dutiful" or even "masculine" woman didn't have the payoff that was promised
There is a better way! When you can change your mind, you change your life.
A Brave Journey is my way to help midlife women explore ideas and concepts to help them start re-evaluating those legacy beliefs and identity stories they’ve been lugging around for decades.
It’s time to figure out how to try new things without the fear of failure or embarrassment, travel and feed your curiosity, have work and activities that you love and make you feel whole and of value, feel confident in taking exhilarating risks and experimenting, and to feel a sense of comfort, power, and safety from within yourself (rather than as provided with price tags from some external source).
I share my experiences and observations as a solo world traveler, interview interesting and inspiring people who share their own transformation stories that often began right where you are today, and dig into many of the actual fears, judgments, mental blocks, and challenges that we all face when we try to do right by ourselves and must go against the grain or norm to do so.
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Have you ever thought to yourself, “When I do XYZ, when I achieve that goal, when I get that thing…. then I will be happy?” I’m sure you’ve heard the term “happiness comes from within,” but it's hard to believe when social media and societal pressures constantly bombard us with messages that happiness lies outside ourselves. Today, we are flipping the script on what it means to be happy. We'll explore how to cultivate genuine joy in your everyday life by redefining "enough" and discovering the power of mindfulness. I'll also share a simple practice to help you stay grounded in the present moment - because that's where happiness truly lives. Top Reasons to Listen to This Episode: Explore why younger generations are reporting lower happiness levels (and what that means for you) Understand why constantly chasing external goals is hindering your happiness Learn how defining what contentment means for you can transform your outlook on happiness Explore a simple practice to cultivate happiness and presence in the here and now How can you start redefining "enough" in your own life? I would love to know! Reach out to me on Instagram or via email, and let’s talk about it. Links & Mentioned Resources: Grab my free journaling guide: Name, Tame, & Claim Your Life Scripts Gallup study on happiness Connect with Sharon: Sign up for my blog Website Instagram Facebook Thanks for listening to the A Brave Journey podcast! If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow, leave a rating and review, share it on social, or pass it along to someone you feel would also appreciate it.
Do you ever feel like you just crushed a personal development goal, but then you begin to feel uninspired or stuck, or the pressure to do more hits you? This episode dives into the importance of rest and integration after periods of significant personal growth and why it's crucial for lasting transformation. We'll explore why we often feel compelled to chase the "next thing" after a breakthrough and how prioritizing integration can be the key to unlocking your full potential. Top Reasons to Listen to This Episode: Understand why we often feel compelled to chase the next achievement after growth Learn how rest and integration allow you to process and internalize your growth so you can have lasting change Learn how to listen to your intuition and prioritize integration when needed Explore practical tips for staying present and mindful after a growth spurt Gain insight into the challenges and opportunities of re-entering your routine after a transformative experience What has been your experience integrating new ways of being after a breakthrough? I would love to know! Reach out to me on Instagram or via email, and let’s talk about it. Links & Mentioned Resources: Grab my free journaling guide: Name, Tame, & Claim Your Life Scripts Connect with Sharon: Sign up for my blog Website Instagram Facebook Thanks for listening to the A Brave Journey podcast! If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow, leave a rating and review, share it on social, or pass it along to someone you feel would also appreciate it.
Do you find yourself slipping back into old patterns, even after making a conscious effort to change? Today, I’m sharing how to overcome those automatic behaviors and habits that interfere with personal growth. This episode is your guide to understanding why we get stuck in those comfy (but ultimately unhelpful) routines, the sneaky ways our egos can sabotage our progress, and how to reprogram your mind so you can live the life you deserve. Learn how to identify limiting beliefs, cultivate curiosity, and rewrite your internal script for lasting change. Top Reasons to Listen to This Episode: Learn why we revert to old habits and patterns we're trying to change Discover how our brains create shortcuts and how they can hinder progress (and how to be aware of them) Understand the role of our ego and "critter brain" in keeping us stuck in familiar routines Recognize the importance of curiosity in overcoming challenges and making positive changes Gain actionable advice on how to identify and overcome limiting beliefs that hold you back from achieving your goals What patterns (consciously or subconsciously) do you continue to fall back on? What limiting beliefs have you been telling yourself? I would love to know. Reach out to me on Instagram or via email, and let’s talk! Links & Guides: 4 Limiting Beliefs That Hold You Back Name, Tame, & Claim Your Life Scripts Connect with Sharon: Sign up for my blog Website Instagram Facebook Thanks for listening to the A Brave Journey podcast! If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow, leave a rating and review, share it on social, or pass it along to someone you feel would also appreciate it.
Many of us live and function in a rather privledged world. We have a lot of stuff. We have a lot of comforts and conveniences that are so "normal" that we don't even see them on a daily basis. IT is all just water to the fish. And we spend quite a bit of energy maintaining and protecting all of those things because another thing that happened along the way is we decided those things were a measure or indication of our success, prowess, and/or worth. So much so, that many of us at one time or another have kept entire storage units of "spare stuff" just in case we needed more. But does the stuff really matter as much as we have been led to believe? Plenty of people in the world live without many of the things we take for granted - and they do so as happy, fulfilled and functioning humans. It can be complicated and even exhausting to maintain the "stuff" we have in our lives. The question is - is it all really necessary? Does it all bring us joy? Does it all have meaning to us? If it does, carry on! But if it doesn't, maybe its time to reevaluate where we are investing our energy - and it might be time to clean out the 'ol storage unit for good!
Why do we give our power away to external structures and belief systems created to keep us right where we are? In this episode, I’m reflecting on a passage from Brianna Wiest’s “The Pivot Year” and exploring how the systems we live within, like our family, education, and work, have been designed to maintain the status quo and hinder us from reaching our full potential. Join me as we navigate the complexities of personal growth, challenge inherited and conditioned beliefs, and reevaluate the structures that shape our lives. Top Reasons to Listen to This Episode: Understand how societal systems limit personal growth and what happens when you find the courage to look inward Explore the journey from living on autopilot within these systems to awakening and focusing on internal power and potential Learn to see surrender as a powerful force, where we learn to trust our inner guidance and the universe, rather than trying to control every outcome What area of your life feels most challenging for you to let go of? What’s one belief system you’re beginning to question? I would love to know your thoughts. Reach out to me on Instagram or via email, and let’s talk about it! Links & Mentioned Resources: Grab my free journaling guide: Name, Tame, & Claim Your Life Scripts The Pivot Year by Brianna Wiest Connect with Sharon: Sign up for my newsletter Website Instagram Facebook Thanks for listening to the A Brave Journey podcast! If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow, leave a rating and review, share it on social, or pass it along to someone you feel would also appreciate it.
When we make something special - when we "pay" attention or give focus to something that has happened to us (or didn't happen to us?), or something that we want, or something that we want to release - we give it power. It becomes something we grasp on to or obsess about or measure our worth by. Often this has the exact opposite effect we think it will. It can artificially keep undesirable things and behaviors in our lives, and block what we really want. Let it go. It doesn't have to be a competition. It's not special.
Do you feel lonely? In a world where we’re always connected, why do we still feel so damn isolated? We crave to belong and feel understood, yet hide behind carefully crafted masks for fear of being “found out.” This episode explores the impact of loneliness, how we’re unintentionally blocking ourselves from true connection, and the "why" behind it all. Top Reasons to Listen to This Episode: Discover the internal and external factors that are fueling your feelings of loneliness Learn why finding the right community and connections starts from within Explore one of the most powerful experiences I had and what that taught me about vulnerability Gain insight into how you can allow vulnerability to lead you to the meaningful connections and community you desire What steps can you take to allow your community to find you? Reach out to me on Instagram or through email, and let’s talk about it. Links & Mentioned Resources: Grab my free journaling guide: Name, Tame, & Claim Your Life Scripts The Happiness Lab podcast Connect with Sharon: Sign up for my newsletter Website Instagram Facebook Thanks for listening to the A Brave Journey podcast! If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow, leave a rating and review, share it on social, or pass it along to someone you feel would also appreciate it.
We are constantly bombarded with words - in meetings, on social media, in class, while socialzing. We are so numb to it at this point, they wash over us without us really realizing it. We have perhaps stopped giving careful thought to what we take in, and what comes out of our mouth. And then we try to communicate in a foreign country. We are immediately forced into considering our words carefully. Thinking through what we want to say. Prioritizing our thoughts and words to be the most clear and efficient we can be. What if we did that in our native or language of comfort? What a different world it might be!
One of the things I have come to realize as I travel and move around the world is - I am not a city girl. I used to be a city girl - I loved the energy and excitement of living in the middle of an urban center. It felt exciting and cool and hip. But I have changed - and that's ok. Our thoughts, ideas, preferences and styles can change and morph over time. It makes sense - we get new input and have new experiences every day. Why wouldn't we change our minds once in a while?
Do you feel like you’re alone in your personal transformation journey? When we let our ego and negative self-talk get in the way, it’s easy to lose that connection to others, leading us to feel like we’re the only one with these “crazy” thoughts or that no one else feels quite the way we do. But the good news? We’re not alone - we just have to stop hiding. Today, I’m talking about how we’re denying our true selves the right to exist and the uncomfortable paradox we’ve created in our quest to fit in. “We as humans live in this paradox where we really can't win. We want validation and recognition, but to be our true selves, we risk rejection and not being loved. And that's a tough place.” Top Reasons to Listen to This Episode: Unpack why it is that we hide from each other Explore the magic that can happen when we allow ourselves to show vulnerability Gain insight into how you can start to get comfortable with showing up as you truly are How will you start being visible and vulnerable? I would love to hear your story. Reach out to me on Instagram or via email, and let’s talk about it. Links & Mentioned Resources: Grab my free journaling guide: Name, Tame, & Claim Your Life Scripts Connect with Sharon: Sign up for my newsletter Website Instagram Facebook Thanks for listening to the A Brave Journey podcast! If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow, leave a rating and review, share it on social, or pass it along to someone you feel would also appreciate it.
There is a saying that goes - whatever it is you think you can or cannot do, you are right. Our minds create a world for us that is either a source of endless possibility and abundance or a prison with endless brick walls. We really do get to choose. What's sad is, the easier choice is to believe "I can't." So that is what most of us choose by default. It's safe. It's neat and clean. But when we choose easy and we choose safe- we miss out on the magic. The magic of happy coincidences. The magic of finding out something surprising and cool about ourselves. The magic of experiencing life on our own terms and in our own way. How might you get out of your own way and break through that imaginary barrier you set - to discover the magic on the other side?
At one point or another (if not 24/7), you have been forced, conditioned, or obligated into being someone you’re not for the sake of conforming for comfort. In our exhausting quest to belong and fit in, we deny our true identities by consciously and subconsciously following societal norms and aligning our beliefs and values to the environments we’re in. In this episode, I’m sharing the replay of a workshop I facilitated around this idea of conforming for comfort. We’ll dig into how conformity shows up in various aspects of our lives, unpack how and why we inherit these belief systems, and what we can do to start breaking free of these facades and embrace our individuality. “Trying to pretend to be someone else is an exhausting and demoralizing process.” - Michelle P. King Top Reasons to Listen to This Episode: Understand how conformity shows up in both our internal and external worlds, plays into our confirmation bias, and reinforces our belief systems Get inspired on how you can be an advocate for others by choosing non-conformity Learn how to recognize and challenge your conformities Explore why incremental change is sometimes the best way to personal growth What came up for you during this episode? How have you been conforming for comfort? Reach out to me on Instagram or through email - I would love to talk about it! Links & Mentioned Resources: Grab my free journaling guide: Name, Tame, & Claim Your Life Scripts Conformity Bind article by Michelle P. King Connect with Sharon: Sign up for my newsletter Website Instagram Facebook Thanks for listening to A Brave Journey: Reclaiming Your Life After 40! If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow, leave a rating and review, share it on social, or pass it along to someone you feel would also appreciate it.
It can feel overwhelming to contemplate transforming your life in some way - like a new job, or family situation, or health habits - or rediscovering the identity you seem to have lost somewhere along your path. So much so that you put it off, you hem and haw, you distract yourself with a million other things that now conveniently must get done before you can get down to business. Let me stop you right there. You are playing a mind game that you cannot win when you do this. You don't have to know everything right now. You don't have to create a roadmap with every single step perfectly planned and orchestrated to get you where you think you want to go. You just don't. In fact, you are preventing yourself from experiencing potentially life changing happy accidents when you leave no room for them in an airtight plan. You don't control the universe. You don't have to. Put it down. That is a heavy burden. Just take the next best step that feels right. It's all you have to do. The rest will begin to fall into place as you move forward. Trust that.
The simplest thing you can do to manifest what you want in your life is to make space for it. Seriously. No amount of hard work or luck or ingenuity will bring you what you desire if you do not have the capacity to receive it. Mindfully opening space or taking steps that prime you for what you want, or even acting and living "as if" the thing you desire is already here will have a magical effect on the reality you live.
By the time we reach midlife, we’ve been given so much input about what we should be doing, thinking, and feeling. We’ve gone through life on autopilot, creating an “acceptable” identity in an effort to belong and pushing away anything that challenges the belief system we’ve built. One day, something happens that leads us to ask, “Who am I?” “What am I missing?” “Is this all there really is?” What would happen if you allowed yourself to explore those niggling feelings and inner voice that’s quietly calling out to you, telling you there’s something more? In this episode, we’re uncovering how our belief system influences our identity and what happens when we navigate the world on autopilot. After listening, you’ll understand how to start peeling back those layers of inherited beliefs so you can reclaim your identity and live in alignment with who you truly are. Top Reasons to Listen to This Episode: Learn how our beliefs are formed, how they influence our ideas of success, and what happens when we’re out of alignment with those beliefs Understand why your belief system is always right (even if it’s wrong) Explore the problem with going through life on autopilot and what happens when you start to reexamine your belief system Understand the relationship between your identity and behavior change Know what it means to reclaim your identity and the work that’s required What identity have you created that is no longer serving you? Reach out to me on Instagram or through email - I would love to talk about it! Links & Mentioned Resources: Grab my free journaling guide: Name, Tame, & Claim Your Life Scripts Connect with Sharon: Sign up for my newsletter Website Instagram Facebook Thanks for listening to A Brave Journey: Reclaiming Your Life After 40! If you enjoyed this episode, be sure to follow, leave a rating and review, share it on social, or pass it along to someone you feel would also appreciate it.
The time is finally here! My inaugural episode of A Brave Journey drops on Tues (1/9/23)! It seemed appropriate that I record this little thought about it from the top of the Mombacho Volcano - sort of a mini brave journey within a journey so to speak. LOL! The hike really challenged me, but I am so glad I did it. It really showed me that I can do anything I set my mind to. Had I known how difficult the climb was, I probably would not have attempted it - and would have missed out on some breathtaking views, wonderful camaraderie and the sense of accomplishment and power I felt for sticking it out. Kind of like life I think . . . . ;) And I know, I know - I actually say Wednesday on the audio, but I chalk that up to my lack of brain and muscle function when I stopped (err, collapsed in a heap) at the top to record it. It was a VOLCANO people! We were up 1222 meters. I got a little jumbled. HAHA
Sometimes you just have an off day - and often we make it worse because we judge ourselves for it, as if there is some cosmic report card for "good behavior." It can be easy to think that if we are on a purposeful journey to grow, be authentic and lead our best lives that any day or period of time where we feel blue, or lethargic, or "unproductive" is a failure or backslide. Frankly, I think if we are in the guilt, shame or blame cycle during those times, those "slip ups" can make us feel anxious, or confused, or that we will have to start over because only a flawless path is acceptable. Or worst of all, that an off day is proof from the universe that we are on the wrong path or not worthy of the path of our dreams. Nope. Wrong. You are just fine. Feel your feels - they all matter. You are not wrong, and you won't die. Do what you need to to care for yourself and grant yourself a little grace. You will come out the other side. :)
You can hear the advice all the time that you need to "put yourself out there," "be vulnerable," "be a friend to gain a friend," or anything along those lines. But it is only when you actually do it that you get that vital validation that its really true. It really works. However small the action, when we open ourselves up to trying something new or being vulnerable enough to meet new people - even though taking that risk that feels so scary to look silly or weird or wrong - what we will typically find out is, we won't die! We will get through that discomfort and come out the other side with a bit of a rush of adrenaline and endorphins. When we find the courage to be open and human and willing to participate in the world, what we gain in connection and experiences is invaluable. Even if the outcome is " Uh, yeah no, I don't wanna do that again!" we still now know something about ourselves that we didn't know before. But the more likely outcome is that we grew, we connected, and we gained even more capacity to live fully.
I don't know who needs to hear this - but I bet there are more of us who do than who don't. Having all your stuff together and being empowered and happy and healthy and killin' it 24/7 is NOT a thing. You are a human being with lots going on - lots to balance. And you exist in a universe that has other things to do than to make you feel comfortable and "practically-perfect-in-every-way." And that is OK!! We would never appreciate the blessings in our lives if we had nothing to measure them against. And we would never get the opportunity to truly step into our own personal power if we didn't get to practice how we choose to respond to the chaos that invariably surrounds us. You have permission to take a day off - hell, take 6! You have permission to not be productive at all for whatever amount of time feels best for you to recharge. You have permission to have an off day, to feel blue, to eat a pint of ice cream to self soothe - if that's your thing. There is no panel of judges just waiting for you to slip up so you can be voted off the island. There is just you - knowing yourself - and granting yourself the grace to go at your own pace, pause to drink a glass of water, set down your mobile phone for a couple hours to just breathe, mess things up royally while you experiment with your life . . . . you have permission to do any and all of it. Don't let the Instagram filters tell you any different. It's all made up - and all we can do is powerfully choose our own behavior, emotional response and thoughts.
What is the story people will make up about you if all they had to go on was observing you walk down the street, or sit on a bus, or enter your office? As much as we are all trying to not care as much about what people think of us (as we should all strive to do!), the fact is that as humans we will automatically fill in the blanks when we see or experience something or someone where we don't get the full picture. We are just wired this way. I would encourage you to check in with "what you look like" as you move through the world. What is your facial expression? What are your eyes doing? What is the energy that is emanating off of you? If you are like me, when in deep concentration or thought - I often revert to the classic "resting b**ch face." I don't even know I am doing it. And in most cases, that expression is in no way a reflection of my mood or energy. But I guarantee you that people observing me would fill in the blanks about what they can't see - and it probably won't be positive! I firmly believe we get back (or have reflected back to us) exactly what we put into the world. If we have a deep frown or avert our eyes or automatically assume that things will go wrong or people will DO us wrong - we will invariably be right. So what if we came out of default mode and showed up differently? What if we met people's eyes and offered a smile or friendly word of greeting? What if we gave people the grace to be fallible or imperfect and just glided through those experiences more neutrally? What if our default mindset was that everything would work out and was always working in our favor? I will tell you what happens - people reflect your positivity back to you, difficult or frustrating situations are more bearable, and things DO tend to work out in you favor. Of course you are going to encounter people and situations that are counter to that - perhaps they even seem to rebel and become more negative when faced with your positivity. I mean, I am not trying to be a PollyAnna here! But you will find in general you do get back exactly what you put out there. And honestly, if all you did was manage to make a tough situation more neutral or not give the sourpuss one more opening to continue their spiral into negativity - its still a win ;) I recorded this thought well over a week ago - and have found that it just continues to be more and more true. I am meeting more people than I ever have in my travels. I am almost always greeted with smiles and friendliness. Things just seem to "work out" as I go about my day. It costs you nothing to give it a try - and you stand to gain a lot!
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