A Year and a Day: Divorce Without Destruction

When facing separation, the fear and overwhelm of finances can feel like the last insurmountable obstacle to freedom. Many people, paralyzed by the unknown, stay in unhappy marriages for the money.This week on A Year and a Day, Jaime Davis sits down with Lori Atwood, CFP®, founder of Fearless Finance, to demystify money management during and after divorce. Lori's firm provides objective, hourly, and affordable financial planning, driven by the mission that finances should never dictate a life-altering decision.They discuss the emotional roots of financial fear, the practical steps to gain control, and the critical elements of building a secure, sustainable life post-divorce.Tune in for:Why the question "Can I survive?" is often the last piece of the puzzle people need answered before deciding to leave a marriage.Lori's top two immediate steps for the "non-moneyed spouse" upon separation: establishing individual credit and gathering data on all accounts.Why the marital house is often "the elephant in the room" and why, from a financial standpoint, selling it is typically the cleaner and less stressful option.The financial pitfalls of nesting and why this arrangement is generally detrimental to long-term financial stability.Lori's simple spending tracker model that focuses only on two main areas—groceries and discretionary spending—to help people consistently spend less than they earn.The advantage of the hourly, no-commission financial planning model for divorcing individuals who need objective advice without the pressure of being sold products.The building blocks of a post-divorce financial roadmap, including cash reserves, emergency funds, and retirement savings.Lori's single most important piece of advice: The most critical thing to your finances is your happiness.About Lori Atwood:Lori Atwood is the founder of Fearless Finance, a firm dedicated to providing objective, hourly, and affordable financial planning. Her goal is to demystify personal finance and help people achieve financial wellbeing, especially during major life transitions like divorce.Resources & Links:Fearless Finance: https://fearlessfinance.comGailor Hunt Law Firm: https://divorcestough.comA Year and a Day is hosted by Jaime Davis, board-certified family law attorney at Gailor Hunt.

Welcome to A Year and a Day. In this episode, board-certified family law attorney Jaime Davis is joined by her law partner, Melissa Essick, to discuss how parents can successfully navigate the holidays after separation and divorce, focusing on reducing stress and building new family traditions.Melissa stresses the importance of adjusting expectations: the holidays won't feel "normal" right away, but they will eventually find a "new normalcy" that can be positive for the children. They discuss why peace over presents is the guiding principle, and how a parent's calmness sets the tone for the entire season.Melissa introduces her key strategy for surviving the holidays: Plan, Prepare, Pivot. She shares practical advice on when to start coordinating holiday schedules (at least two months out), how to handle logistical roadblocks, and the critical need for flexibility. The attorneys also review best practices for communication, including the use of tools like Our Family Wizard to maintain a calm, fact-based tone, and offer guidance on sensitive topics like introducing a new partner and setting boundaries with extended family. Ultimately, they emphasize putting the children first to ensure a stress-free and joyful holiday season.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here!While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is specific to the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Welcome to A Year and a Day. In this episode, board-certified family law attorney Jaime Davis talks with Thad Hollis, an expert in conflict resolution, divorce coaching, and mediation, and the founder of Better Outcomes.Thad introduces his powerful philosophy: "Conflict is inevitable. Combat is optional." He explains how someone in the middle of a painful divorce can begin to view conflict as a "gift"—an opportunity for positive change rather than a source of destruction. Thad shares his mediation and coaching techniques, emphasizing the need for clients to "find their voice" and shift their mindset from a win-lose battleground to constructive negotiation.Jaime and Thad discuss common emotional roadblocks in divorce, such as the need "to be heard," feelings of unfairness, and the prevalence of power imbalances in relationships. They conclude by focusing on the ultimate goal: being kind and future-focused to ensure the best possible outcome for the children and the co-parenting relationship.Need help from Thad? Contact him by visiting betteroutcomes.au.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here!While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is specific to the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Welcome to A Year and a Day. In this episode, Jaime Davis, a board-certified family law attorney at Gailor Hunt, focuses on helping children during family transitions by talking with Todd Sarner, founder of Transformative Parenting and a licensed psychotherapist.Todd's work is built on Attachment First Science, which centers on the child's need for security in their primary relationships. He explains how his personal experience as a child of divorce inspired his mission to help parents move from daily chaos to lasting calm.Jaime and Todd discuss why a child's behavior—such as resistance and defiance—should always be viewed as symptoms of underlying anxiety or insecurity, especially when navigating a breakup or divorce. Todd reveals why children of divorce often struggle with separation anxiety and feel unable to connect to both parents simultaneously.They explore practical strategies for parents to unite, including the concept of "bridging" to help children feel connected to the absent parent. Todd also shares why he recommends a "parent timeout" over a child timeout when emotions run high, and emphasizes that parental self-care is the most critical factor in promoting a child's well-being.Need help from Todd? Contact him by visiting TransformativeParenting.com.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here!While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is specific to the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Welcome to A Year in a Day. I'm Jaime Davis, Board Certified Family Law Attorney at Gailor Hunt. On this show, I talk with lawyers, psychologists, and other experts with the goal of helping you navigate divorce without destruction.In this episode, I'm joined by my law partner and fellow family law attorney, Melissa Essick, to discuss practical tips and suggestions for creating a holiday custody schedule that works best for your family during separation and divorce.Melissa and I explore the holidays most often included in agreements—from Christmas and Thanksgiving to birthdays and spring break—and break down the three main scheduling approaches: rotating, fixed, and shared/split days. We offer expert insights into crucial factors to consider, such as maintaining family traditions, the impact of travel and distance, school calendars (traditional vs. year-round), and the age of your children. We also offer advice on sensitive topics like gift-giving and decorations and stress the importance of flexibility and cooperation to reduce stress. Finally, we discuss what happens when parents simply can’t agree, and why a customized agreement is almost always better than a judge's standard order.Whether you're new to holiday custody schedules or looking to refine your current plan, our planning tips can help you forge a holiday visitation plan that prioritizes your children's well-being and ensures everyone can embrace the spirit of the season.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here!While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is specific to the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Welcome to A Year and a Day. In this episode, board-certified family law attorney Jaime Davis sits down with relationship coach Johanna Lynn, founder of the Family Imprint Institute, to explore the deep, often invisible emotional patterns we inherit from our families—and how they fuel conflict, especially when divorcing a spouse with narcissistic tendencies.Johanna explains the concept of the family blueprint and how our biography becomes our biology, leading us to fall in love with the familiar, even if it’s destructive. She discusses how narcissism develops, why it often appears on a spectrum, and how recurring conflicts in a marriage are really clues to deeper, unacknowledged hurts rooted in our past.Together, Jaime and Johanna delve into the immense emotional toll of divorcing a narcissist, offering guidance on how the non-narcissistic partner can rebuild their sense of self and break the cycle of emotional abuse and blame. Johanna introduces the concept of integrative body psychotherapy as a tool to shift ingrained responses. Finally, they discuss the most important thing a parent can do to protect their children from inheriting harmful patterns and ensure a path toward a more peaceful separation.Need help from Johanna? Contact her by visiting https://www.google.com/search?q=TheFamilyImprint.com.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here!While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is specific to the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Welcome to A Year and a Day, with host Jaime Davis, a board-certified family law attorney at Gaylor Hunt. In this episode, Jaime is in the hot seat as she's interviewed by special guest host Erica Rooney. Jaime shares her unique perspective on divorce, offering insights she's gained from over 24 years of experience.Jaime discusses the most common misconceptions about divorce, including the idea that a cheating spouse means you "get everything." She also explains the one question she wishes more people would ask her and why consulting with an attorney early in the process is so crucial.Together, Jaime and Erica delve into the importance of prenups, the surprising details of North Carolina's "alienation of affection" law, and the emotional challenges of divorce. Jaime also shares why you should never use social media during the process and how focusing on resolution—not revenge—is key to a healthier outcome. They discuss what’s behind the rising trend of "gray divorce" and how people are approaching separation differently today.Jaime also talks about her book, "A Year and a Day: Divorce Without Destruction," which is based on episodes from the podcast.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here!While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is specific to divorce and separation according to laws in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Welcome to A Year and a Day. In this episode, Jaime Davis, a board-certified family law attorney at Gailor Hunt, sits down with Bryan Power, creator of MyRelationshipFail.com, to discuss how a relationship crisis can be a powerful catalyst for personal and relational healing.Bryan shares his personal story of a near-divorce experience that began with a restraining order, explaining how this "final nail in the coffin" moment became a turning point. Together, Jaime and Bryan explore Integrated Attachment Theory and its six core elements: core wounds, emotional control, needs, boundaries, communication, and behavior. Bryan explains the four main attachment styles—secure, anxious, dismissive avoidant, and fearful avoidant—and why understanding them is crucial for healing.They also discuss why some communication breakdowns happen, how to shift your mindset from blame to personal growth, and why it's so important to be willing to do the work, even if your spouse isn't. Bryan explains how focusing on yourself can lead to a brand-new, healthier relationship, whether it's with your current spouse or a new partner.Need help from Bryan? Take the quiz or contact him by visiting MyRelationshipFail.com.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.comLike this show? Rate it here!While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

When the dust settles after divorce, what comes next for men who are left feeling lost, ashamed, or angry? In this episode, Jaime Davis sits down with Marc Azoulay, a licensed psychotherapist and founder of Men’s Therapy Online, to explore the often-overlooked emotional fallout of divorce for men. Marc shares the two most common archetypes he sees in his work—“the villain” and “the victim”—and explains how early childhood conditioning, societal expectations, and emotional isolation shape men’s post-divorce struggles.Together, Jaime and Marc discuss why some men default to “nice guy” behavior, why communication breakdowns are so common, and how therapy, community, and honest self-reflection can lead to genuine healing. Marc also explains how he integrates psychoanalysis, neuroscience, and spirituality into his holistic approach to therapy—and why it’s never too late to rewrite your story.Need help from Marc? Contact him by visiting www.menstherapy.online.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here! While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

What does it look like to rebuild—and thrive—after a high-profile divorce? In this episode, host Jaime is joined by Caroline Stanbury, star of The Real Housewives of Dubai, entrepreneur, and mom of three. Caroline shares the raw truth behind her 18-year marriage, navigating divorce in the public eye, and what it’s really like co-parenting teenagers with her ex.From the importance of financial independence to managing blended family dynamics, Caroline opens up about the lessons she’s learned about love, parenting, and personal growth. She also offers candid advice for anyone facing divorce later in life—and explains why your second chapter might just be your best.Hear Jaime on Caroline's podcast, Uncut and Uncensored with Caroline Stanbury.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here! While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

In this episode, Jaime is joined by licensed marriage and family therapist Veronica Cisneros to explore the unique challenges that high-achieving women often face in marriage—and what they can do about it. Veronica shares her own wake-up call moment at the bank, how she reclaimed her identity, and why success can sometimes create rifts in a relationship. Together, they unpack the emotional toll of running away from unhealed pain, how vulnerability can be a superpower, and what steps to take when you feel like you’ve lost yourself in your relationship.Need help from Veronica? Contact her by visiting www.veronicacisneros.org.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here! While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

What if the end of a long marriage could be the beginning of financial freedom? In this episode, Jaime sits down with Haleh Moddasser, Managing Partner and Senior Wealth Advisor at Stearns Financial Group, to explore the financial realities of Gray divorce—when couples split later in life. Haleh shares why women over 50 are initiating divorce more often, the costly mistakes they need to avoid, and how to negotiate from a position of strength. From understanding the true value of assets to rethinking alimony and navigating Social Security benefits, this episode is packed with essential advice for building financial independence after divorce. Whether you're facing a Gray divorce or supporting someone who is, Haleh offers both insight and inspiration for what’s next.Need help from Haleh? Contact her by visiting www.stearnsfinancial.com.Check out Stearns' Women in MotionGet Haleh's book, "Gray Divorce, Silver Linings"If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here! While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Divorce can bring a whirlwind of emotions and financial uncertainty, but understanding your financial situation is key to making empowered decisions. In this episode, Jaime sits down with financial expert Jennifer Lee, founder of Modern Wealth and author of Squeeze the Juice: Live with Purpose, Then Leave a Legacy. If you weren’t the one managing the finances in your marriage—or earned significantly less than your spouse—you may be considered the non-moneyed spouse, and navigating divorce can feel especially daunting. Jennifer lays out the key steps to take control of your finances, uncover hidden assets, and decide whether keeping the house is the right move. Need help from Jennifer? Contact her by visiting www.modern-wealth.com.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here! While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Divorce doesn’t have to be a battle. In the first episode of season nine, Jaime takes the guest seat as producer Cee Cee Huffman interviews her about her book, A Year and a Day: Divorce Without Destruction. Jaime shares key strategies for approaching divorce with preparation and intention, covering how to initiate separation, build a strong support team, focus on what truly matters, prioritize children's well-being, and maintain emotional health. Whether you're contemplating divorce or already in the process, this episode offers expert guidance on navigating this major life decision with clarity and confidence. Tune in to learn how you can move beyond just surviving divorce.

In this episode, Jaime talks to seasoned tax attorney Hubert Johnson about the financial complexities of divorce. Hubert dives into the tax implications of divorce, from filing status changes to the proper handling of alimony, child support, and asset divisions. He emphasizes the importance of getting informed early to avoid costly mistakes and protect your financial future. Whether your concern is navigating tax debt, understanding retirement account splits, or dealing with business liabilities, Hubert shares his insights on making smart financial decisions during divorce.Need help from Hubert? Contact him by visiting www.guardiantaxlaw.com.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here! While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Betrayal recovery coach, attorney, and TEDx speaker Lora Cheadle is joining Jaime to explore how to transform feelings of betrayal into empowerment. Lora shares her story of healing after discovering her husband’s long-term infidelity and reveals the practices and mindset shifts that helped her rebuild her life. They discuss the importance of grieving authentically, learning to reclaim self-trust, and finding joy and freedom on the other side. Lora introduces her signature “FLAUNT” method, a five-step process designed to guide anyone moving through betrayal or heartbreak toward rediscovering their inner strength and self-worth. Need help from Lora? Contact her by visiting www.loracheadle.com.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here! While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Dawn Wiggins is a divorce recovery coach and therapist and, in this episode, she shares her personal journey of healing from trauma and divorce and the transformative techniques she uses to help others, including EMDR, EFT tapping, and homeopathy. Jaime and Dawn explore how childhood attachment issues and unresolved trauma can impact relationships, and how holistic healing methods can empower individuals to break free from destructive patterns. Dawn also addresses the loneliness of divorce and offers insight into moving forward with confidence and clarity.Need help from Dawn? Contact her by visiting www.mycoachdawn.com.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here! While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

In this episode, Jaime's joined by Victoria Kirilloff, a certified divorce financial analyst and mediator with a passion for empowering individuals during the divorce process. Drawing from her own challenging divorce experience, Victoria created the Divorce Impact Analysis Report, a comprehensive tool designed to provide financial clarity for those navigating this complex journey. Victoria discusses the intricacies of spousal support, tax implications, and a post-divorce cost-of-living analysis. With her unique upbringing and personal insights, she emphasizes the need for transparency and proactive planning to transform what is often a destructive experience into a constructive one.Need help from Victoria? Contact her by visiting www.victoriakirilloff.com.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here! While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Jaime's joined by Catherine Shanahan and Karen Chellew, co-founders of My Divorce Solution, a divorce financial preparation service. They share how financial preparedness can make or break a divorce settlement, highlighting the importance of financial clarity and separating emotions from financial decisions. Learn how their innovative approach empowers individuals to make informed decisions and negotiate confidently for a smoother, more strategic divorce process.Need help from Catherine and Karen? Contact them by visiting www.mydivorcesolution.com.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here! While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.

Jaime and fellow family law attorney Theresa Viera, founder of Modern Legal, are tackling relocation in custody cases. As separated parents contemplate moving to a new city, state, or country, what happens to the children? Jaime and Theresa explore the factors judges consider, the impact of relocation on a child's well-being, and potential changes to custody schedules. Whether considering a move or trying to keep your child nearby, this episode offers insights into navigating the legal system and keeping your child's best interest at the forefront. Need help from Theresa? Contact her by visiting www.modernlegalnc.com.If you are in need of legal assistance in North Carolina, contact us at Gailor Hunt by visiting www.divorceistough.com.Like this show? Rate it here! While the information presented is intended to provide you with general information to navigate divorce without destruction, this podcast is not legal advice. This information is based on specific to navigating relocation by the law in North Carolina. If you have any questions before taking action, consult an attorney who is licensed in your state.