Adaptable | Behavior Explained

Most affairs aren't about sex, they're about an unmet need the person can't name. EMDR therapist Kelly O'Horo explains how attachment injuries drive infidelity, and shares two stories of affairs that began after the birth of a child, when watching a wife nurture their baby reawakened a man's own childhood wounds. I'm Kelly O'Horo, Attachment based EMDR Therapist, EMDRIA Consultant, and Advanced Trainer. I'm a mom of 5, Nonna of 5, wife, and a healer. I have the honor of spending my workdays walking along side people while they brave their healing journeys. I try to live with the generous assumption that we're all doing the best we can with what we know. Therapists are teachers for the "life stuff" and "emotional vocabulary" that may not have been learned due to gaps in our care givers capabilities. In the last 15 years I've learned that people are freaking amazing, resilient, and inspiring. Most importantly, we are hardwired for connection and for healing! I hope to bring an authentic, compassionate, and unpolished approach while we explore a variety of topics such as parenting, marriage, relationships, dating, trauma, attachment, adoption, depression, addiction, anxiety, and love! There's a why for all behaviors and an explanation that makes perfect sense as emotion is at the root of it all. -- Links -- https://linktr.ee/kellyohorolpc https://youtu.be/rLnARKekvgo https://www.emdria.org/find-an-emdr-therapist/

Why do people cheat? This episode, unpacks the six real reasons behind infidelity, emotional disconnection, unmet needs, low commitment, situational pressures, self-esteem, and attachment injuries plus what reconciliation takes, what discovery feels like for both partners, and the odds a marriage survives an affair. The anchor episode of the series. (Repackaged from the original Infidelity episode.) I'm Kelly O'Horo, Attachment based EMDR Therapist, EMDRIA Consultant, and Advanced Trainer. I'm a mom of 5, Nonna of 5, wife, and a healer. I have the honor of spending my workdays walking along side people while they brave their healing journeys. I try to live with the generous assumption that we're all doing the best we can with what we know. Therapists are teachers for the "life stuff" and "emotional vocabulary" that may not have been learned due to gaps in our care givers capabilities. In the last 15 years I've learned that people are freaking amazing, resilient, and inspiring. Most importantly, we are hardwired for connection and for healing! I hope to bring an authentic, compassionate, and unpolished approach while we explore a variety of topics such as parenting, marriage, relationships, dating, trauma, attachment, adoption, depression, addiction, anxiety, and love! There's a why for all behaviors and an explanation that makes perfect sense as emotion is at the root of it all. -- Links -- https://linktr.ee/kellyohorolpc https://youtu.be/rLnARKekvgo https://www.emdria.org/find-an-emdr-therapist/

I turned 50 and got honest about time, stress, and what really matters. In this personal episode, therapist and founder Kelly O'Horo shares what midlife revealed: why time stops feeling abstract, how stress is often a signal of misalignment rather than busyness, and the shift from building a life to using it to give back. A candid conversation about purpose, fear, and stepping into bigger things before you feel ready. Chapters 0:00 — Turning 50 and telling the truth 1:30 — When time stops feeling abstract 4:00 — Stress as a signal of misalignment 6:30 — From building to meaning 9:00 — Stepping into teaching at a bigger scale 11:30 — You don't wait until you're ready 13:30 — The responsibility to pay it forward I'm Kelly O'Horo, Attachment based EMDR Therapist, EMDRIA Consultant, and Advanced Trainer. I'm a mom of 5, Nonna of 5, wife, and a healer. I have the honor of spending my workdays walking along side people while they brave their healing journeys. I try to live with the generous assumption that we're all doing the best we can with what we know. Therapists are teachers for the "life stuff" and "emotional vocabulary" that may not have been learned due to gaps in our care givers capabilities. In the last 15 years I've learned that people are freaking amazing, resilient, and inspiring. Most importantly, we are hardwired for connection and for healing! I hope to bring an authentic, compassionate, and unpolished approach while we explore a variety of topics such as parenting, marriage, relationships, dating, trauma, attachment, adoption, depression, addiction, anxiety, and love! There's a why for all behaviors and an explanation that makes perfect sense as emotion is at the root of it all. -- Links -- https://linktr.ee/kellyohorolpc https://youtu.be/rLnARKekvgo https://www.emdria.org/find-an-emdr-therapist/

Love doesn't fail marriages. Unspoken expectations do. So before you walk down that aisle, there are a handful of conversations almost no one has and they're the ones that actually shape your day-to-day life together. I'm Kelly, an EMDR therapist, and today I'll walk you through every one. Before you say “I do,” there are a handful of conversations most couples never have and they're the ones that actually shape married life. In this episode, EMDR therapist Kelly O'Horo walks through what every couple needs to get clear on before the wedding: how you each handle conflict and repair, money and invisible labor, gender-role and family expectations, intimacy, and emotional safety. Grounded in Gottman's research, this is the premarital conversation guide nobody hands you. Whether you're engaged, thinking about it, or years in — this one's for you. I'm Kelly O'Horo, Attachment based EMDR Therapist, EMDRIA Consultant, and Advanced Trainer. I'm a mom of 5, Nonna of 5, wife, and a healer. I have the honor of spending my workdays walking along side people while they brave their healing journeys. I try to live with the generous assumption that we're all doing the best we can with what we know. Therapists are teachers for the "life stuff" and "emotional vocabulary" that may not have been learned due to gaps in our care givers capabilities. In the last 15 years I've learned that people are freaking amazing, resilient, and inspiring. Most importantly, we are hardwired for connection and for healing! I hope to bring an authentic, compassionate, and unpolished approach while we explore a variety of topics such as parenting, marriage, relationships, dating, trauma, attachment, adoption, depression, addiction, anxiety, and love! There's a why for all behaviors and an explanation that makes perfect sense as emotion is at the root of it all. -- Links -- https://linktr.ee/kellyohorolpc https://youtu.be/rLnARKekvgo https://www.emdria.org/find-an-emdr-therapist/

You can be profoundly traumatized by something your body lived through — even when everyone tells you you're “lucky to be alive.” Because surviving doesn't mean your nervous system knows you're safe. I'm Kelly, an EMDR therapist, and today we're talking about medical trauma. Surviving a heart attack, cancer, a stroke, or a serious injury doesn't mean your nervous system knows you're safe. In this episode, EMDR therapist Kelly O'Horo explains medical trauma — why life-threatening medical events get stored as trauma, why so many survivors stay “braced” and hypervigilant, the grief of a body that can't do what it once did, and how EMDR helps the brain finally update to “that was then, this is now.” If you've ever wondered why you don't feel okay even though you survived, this one's for you. Chapters 0:00 — “Why don't I feel okay — I survived?” 2:00 — Why medical events become trauma 6:00 — The braced nervous system 10:00 — Powerlessness, fear & grief 14:00 — How EMDR helps the brain update 18:00 — Healing isn't erasing — it's integrating I'm Kelly O'Horo, Attachment based EMDR Therapist, EMDRIA Consultant, and Advanced Trainer. I'm a mom of 5, Nonna of 5, wife, and a healer. I have the honor of spending my workdays walking along side people while they brave their healing journeys. I try to live with the generous assumption that we're all doing the best we can with what we know. Therapists are teachers for the "life stuff" and "emotional vocabulary" that may not have been learned due to gaps in our care givers capabilities. In the last 15 years I've learned that people are freaking amazing, resilient, and inspiring. Most importantly, we are hardwired for connection and for healing! I hope to bring an authentic, compassionate, and unpolished approach while we explore a variety of topics such as parenting, marriage, relationships, dating, trauma, attachment, adoption, depression, addiction, anxiety, and love! There's a why for all behaviors and an explanation that makes perfect sense as emotion is at the root of it all. -- Links -- https://linktr.ee/kellyohorolpc https://youtu.be/rLnARKekvgo https://www.emdria.org/find-an-emdr-therapist/