Ask Kati Anything

In this episode, Kati explains why self harming can actually make us feel better and she even dives into the reasons we can keep coming back to it. She also talks about anxiety and if it will ever go away or if it’s something we have to live with for the rest of our lives. She then discusses physical touch and why some of us might be uncomfortable with it, and she offers ways to overcome it and how to talk with those we love about it. She also gets into some of the ramifications of childhood sexual abuse and neglect, and how we can work through that as well. This and so much more in this week’s episode! Ask Kati Anything ep. 164 | Your mental health podcast, with Kati Morton, LMFT Audience questions: 1. Can you explain why self harm, in my case cutting, results in me feeling really calm (I suffer with depression and anxiety), and even thinking about doing it calms me down... 2. Will my anxiety ever really go away? I have learned to push through so much of my anxiety using different coping skills I learned in therapy. But... 3. After years of neglect as a kid, I've never learned about physical touch. I don't remember being hugged and such. So now, what seems intuitive for most people feels so confusing... 4. I’m wondering how I can honor and validate my boyfriend's feelings even when they trigger me. I grew up in an emotionally neglectful/abusive environment where I... 5. In one of your episodes you talked about some of your colleagues being judgmental about how you paced yourself getting your credit hours in school and wondering why... 6. Hi Kati. I have asked this question so many times. I really want your advice. I have had anorexia since I was 13, I'm now 40. I have a 7 year old daughter. I never want to have her go through this too and I want to know how I should talk to her about this because, even though she hasn't asked yet, she has seen some ED behaviors before from me and... 7. Is it normal for a child (pre-pubescent) to masturbate while thinking about being punished, or is this related to sexual trauma? I have a history of verbal and emotional abuse and neglect, but... 8. How can you tell if your mum was and still is emotionally neglectful and or abusive? I have watched your videos about childhood emotional neglect extensively... https://www.smithsonianmag.com/smart-news/theres-scientific-reason-why-self-harm-makes-some-people-feel-better-180953062/ Here are some resources that can help: The National Suicide Prevention Lifeline: 1-800-273-8255 The Crisis Text Line: Text HOME to 741741 The Trevor Project: 1-866-488-7386 The Jed Foundation: https://www.jedfoundation.org/ The American Foundation for Suicide Prevention: https://afsp.org/ If you are in immediate danger, please call 911 KATI'S BOOKS (in stores now) Traumatized   https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok?    http://bit.ly/2s0mULy MORE YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@katimorton & https://www.youtube.com/@OTDM Amazon Suggestions https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton Online Therapy  I do not currently offer online therapy.  My sponsor BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online counselor, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati Patreon https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ Business Contact   Linnea Toney  linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week we're discussing emotion regulation, feeling anxious and depressed at the same time, and why that can be so uncomfortable and dangerous! Kati also explains why we can feel angry at our abusers, but struggle with this anger because they were abused themselves. Next, we discuss attachment to our therapists and why we can miss them after our sessions have ended. We also talk about trauma, nightmares, and how to heal. Ask Kati Anything | Your mental health podcast, with Kati Morton, LMFT Audience questions: 1. My question is about emotion regulation…I think. I have learned to tolerate and move through fairly bad anxiety, and I’m getting better at noticing and stopping depression spirals too, but I still have a big problem: sometimes the depression and anxiety mash together and create this whirlwind of grief, sadness, fear and shame, and I feel like I’m literally exploding inside... 2. I have a history of childhood trauma, and at the moment I feel really torn between feeling angry towards my parents and feeling like I have no right to be angry with them because I am aware that they didn't intentionally hurt me. But... 3. Would it be normal or acceptable to ask my therapist if I can just check in with her every now and then (like maybe every 3 months or so)? Do people do that? I don't have a big need to... 4. My question is also regarding how trauma, in particular childhood trauma, manifests in our bodies. I have a condition called interstitial cystitis/painful bladder syndrome and pelvic floor disorder. After years and years and thousands of dollars seeking medical attention... 5. I want to know why it is so difficult to ask for help? I am so overwhelmed with things to do but won't ask for help. How do I get the courage to ask for... 6. I’m wondering what to do about my intense fear of failure and the need to be perfect. For context, I have a lot of trauma and was emotionally abused/neglected in childhood. Because of this, I have an anxious attachment, OCD, and I spent some time in a mental hospital when I was in college. I also have a history of disordered eating, self harm, generalized anxiety, and ADHD. I am now 23, and... 7. Was just wondering - how to cope with CPTSD nightmares? I've been having them every single night, seeing my triggers everywhere in the dreams and being confronted with my abusers face to face. It's an awful experience... 8. I have a question about trauma and disgust and I am really scared that I might be the only one feeling like that. I recently talked to my best friend about feeling turned on by movie scenes, etc. and I told her that for me that belly tingling... KATI'S BOOKS (in stores now) Traumatized   https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok?    http://bit.ly/2s0mULy YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@katimorton & https://www.youtube.com/@OTDM Amazon Suggestions https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton Online Therapy  I do not currently offer online therapy.  My sponsor BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online counselor, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati Patreon https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ Business Contact   Linnea Toney  linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week Kati talks about trauma healing, if we can do it without talking through the specifics, and how to untangle our identity from what happened to us. She also discusses attachment in therapy, with our abusers, and its connection to OCD. She explains why we may not have memories of traumatic times, and why we might not be able to recognize ourselves in photos. She also talks about medical trauma, revisiting the places where trauma took place, and whether or not a narcissistic parent can get better as they get older. This and so much more in this trauma pack episode! Ask Kati Anything ep. 162 | Your mental health podcast, with Kati Morton, LMFT Audience questions: 1. When it comes to trauma therapy, do you actually have to talk about the specific event(s) to be successful with it? Or can you still heal from trauma by working on... 2. I get super easily attached to people and the attachments can be all consuming. I want to find a therapist (not specifically to talk about that but I’m sure it’ll come up) and I’m not sure what... 3. Hi Kati, I'm 25 and I have a chronic illness which is life limiting. In the past year it has become very serious and about 5 months ago, during a long stay in hospital, my doctors told my family and me that we should prepare for the worst. 4. I was wondering where an attachment to a therapist might come from even if I grew up with parents who met my needs? I am almost obsessed with the idea of my therapist, she is someone I... 5. My question has to do with still processing and dealing with trauma you sustained as a child. I grew up with an alcoholic father who eventually passed away due to his addiction to alcohol. But even now, I... 6. I recognize myself when I look at my childhood photos, but still, I don't feel any emotional connection or remember the situation when the photo was taken or the person who took it. Why is that? And how can I help myself remember my childhood? 7. Is there any benefit to revisiting places where you experienced trauma? I'm going to start processing past trauma with my therapist soon, but I don't have a lot of clear memories from that time in my life... 8. Can a narcissistic parent, who has no desire to improve themselves, tone down their narcissistic tendencies simply due to old age? 9. How long does it take for a person to work through trauma? As soon as I started discussing this with my therapist, my sleep and physical health has gone for a toss. My stress levels have... Kati's Books (in stores now) Traumatized   https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok?    http://bit.ly/2s0mULy YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@katimorton & https://www.youtube.com/@OTDM Amazon Suggestions https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton Online Therapy  I do not currently offer online therapy.  My sponsor BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online counselor, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati Patreon https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ Business Contact   Linnea Toney  linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week Kati talks about recording therapy sessions and if that’s a good idea or even allowed. She also explains why we would be looking for a deeper meaning when our therapist tells us things, and what connection that can have to our attachment style. She also discusses the effects of growing up with an addict in our home, and why being around verbal abuse can be traumatic. This and much more in this week’s episode! Ask Kati Anything ep. 161 | Your mental health podcast, with Kati Morton, LMFT Audience questions: 1. What are your thoughts on voice recording therapy sessions? I have the past 3 sessions and my therapist doesn’t know. I tend to listen to them multiple times a week and I don’t know why. I also found my therapist on social media and like learning more about her... 2. I tend to ruminate on what my therapist says following our sessions. While doing so I’ll try to look for deeper meaning because I have a hard time taking... 3. I’ve started to be able to open up a bit more in therapy and talk about more difficult things. I don’t want to accept it but I know part of it was sexual abuse... 4. My question is about what affects growing up with parents who argued and did verbal abuse to each other has on a child who had to watch it and live with it? My dad was verbally abusive to my mom and he was... 5. I am 30 years old and still carry my teddy with me everywhere I go. I have an intense fear that if I leave him home alone, my house might burn down, or I will for some reason not be able to... 6. I have a question regarding addictions and addictive behaviors. I have noticed that I have a problem with addictions and addictive behaviors. However, the problem I have is that I... 7. How do you know how you feel for real? I constantly doubt my feelings, and I find it so hard to trust that my feelings are not made-up (particularly sad feelings; I never really doubt happy feelings). There are times that I... 8. I am curious if people could be traumatized by movies? I was really scared once when I watched a movie when I was 13 or 14 and that wasn’t even a scary movie. However, I started to have those imaginations that if I open a door I’ll see a corpse... Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

This week licensed therapist Kati Morton dives into the differences between numbing out and dissociation, and why one can lead to the other sometimes. She also explains why we can get caught up in a cycle of not reaching out because we don’t want to be too much, and then not being able to get help when we are struggling. She also talks about why we can feel like we don’t belong anywhere, and why we can use humor to deal with tough situations. She really challenges us to look into our old familial patterns this week, and see where these sabotaging behaviors are coming from. This and much more in this week’s episode! Ask Kati Anything ep. 160 | Your mental health podcast, with Kati Morton, LMFT Audience questions: 1. I would love to hear your opinions on the difference between numbing out and dissociation. I have been talking a lot with my therapist about not wanting to be present in my body, but struggling to determine when I am numbing out (phone, sleeping) or truly dissociated... 2. Hope you’re okay. How do you get out of the cycle of not reaching out for help because you think it’ll be too much for people and not feeling safe reaching out? I find myself picking and choosing the exact thing to say rather than letting it... 3. I feel like I don't belong anywhere (family, work/ uni, my flat…). I feel quite lost and lonely and I'm wondering: What can I do to feel a sense of belonging in this world? I’m autistic and have depression, anxiety as well as anorexia... 4. Do you see any issues with using humor to talk about certain things with your therapist? In general I usually try to make people laugh almost as a self defense mechanism and find it sometimes helps when introducing a topic or situation... 5. I was wondering whether it’s better to distract from something like a flashback or panic attack or just let it play out? I sometimes feel the build up to something... 6. My husband and I are both in therapy and seeing different therapists at the same practice. We are both dealing with the same marital issue in our individual therapy sessions. My therapist offered to talk to my husband's therapist... 7. How do you know if you're even doing therapy right? I’ve been in therapy for 9 months and took a couple months break. She knows I was sexually abused and that I used self harm to deal with it. But I don’t know if I’m sharing what I need... 8. Is NPD like a spectrum? I watched your video about 8 signs of narcissistic mom and recognised mostly my father. Not all of these fit with him... Ask Kati Anything | Your mental health podcast, with Kati Morton, LMFT Kati's Books (in stores now) Traumatized   https://geni.us/Bfak0j Are u ok?    http://bit.ly/2s0mULy YouTube https://www.youtube.com/@katimorton & https://www.youtube.com/@OTDM Amazon Suggestions https://www.amazon.com/shop/katimorton Online Therapy  I do not currently offer online therapy.  My sponsor BetterHelp can connect you with a licensed, online counselor, please visit: https://betterhelp.com/kati Patreon https://www.katimorton.com/kati-morton-patreon/ Business Contact   Linnea Toney  linnea@underscoretalent.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices