Back To Happy

Well, it’s a bittersweet day in the land of Back to Happy because we’re wrapping up our show with this episode. Between the two of us, we’ve been through a lot—but we genuinely, gradually have come back happier every time. Yes, there will be pain in life. But if you keep perspective and get real about what changes need to be made, what you learned and how to proceed… peace and equanimity can be found. May this episode help you rise up to greater happiness in your own heart. We send you love and we thank you for listening, Suzanne and Debi WHO ARE THEY? WHO ARE THEY? Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck. Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care.  

Few experiences in life can be more bewildering than watching your 19-year-old daughter get suddenly, seriously ill. And then stay ill, off and on, for the next eight years. This is what happened to Debi Granger as her daughter Amera struggled with congestive heart failure, nearly dying three times. And yet. Such a time can also be when life is most inspiring, because a heart and kidney donated by a stranger ultimately saved her life. Debi tells her story, with its surprise ending, in such grace and strength it should inspire you for a long time to come.   May you find her story useful as you find your way back to happiness, and what really matters in this life, yourself. Sending a big hug, Suzanne & Debi SOOTHING RESOURCES & LINKS The Self Care Group for Extremely Busy Women WHO ARE THEY? WHO ARE THEY?  Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck.  Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care.  

This show is a replay of one of our most popular shows, #6, honoring Suzanne’s late daughter Teal. If you feel stuck in life, unable to move forward or backwards, take a bit of inspiration here. Teal was a unique free spirit who felt the world was her oyster … and she rolled through it with ease, equanimity and a true lightness.  Leaving behind her journals, and memories of her remarkable life, she is here to teach us:  How to live with uncertainty How to find acceptance How to detach from what bothers us How to ‘just be’  How to stop trying to be all things to all people May you find some fun inspiration here as Debi and I talk about Teal and her amazing life.  LINKS About Teal page from our website XBW PODCAST   Teal playing on the Champs des Mars in Paris, France in 2011

It seems in life we are always running to catch up with something. Or someone. I don’t know about you, but I always feel just slightly behind. Yet, a lot of serenity comes from feeling that you have enough time. And that you have enough of what you need in general in life. In this show, Debi and I take on the tricky subject of managing time as a way to get back to happiness and inner peace. Among other things we cover: The power of mini habits to change your life My accountability pal and how we help each other along The magic of noting and really seeing your accomplishments How our To DO’s take over our mental space How to get out of the habit of ‘Shoulding’ on yourself May this help you rein in time a bit more so it’s on your side. Submitted with love, Suzanne and Debi RESOURCES The Self Care Group for Extremely Busy Women WHO ARE THEY? WHO ARE THEY?  Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck.  Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care.  

Control—you either love it…or you run from it. Seems we’re all caught in that push-pull dance in many areas of our lives. So, Debi & Suzanne knock around what we actually have control of, what we don’t—and why this really effects our happiness.  What Debi tells herself when she feels like she has to let go The biggest source of anxiety for many people The many benefits of letting go How to keep the faith even in hard times What do we actually have control of? What Suzanne learned about control from her 56,000 person Facebook group May this serve you well! Submitted with love and friendship, Debi & Suzanne RESOURCES The Self Care Group for Extremely Busy Women WHO ARE THEY?    WHO ARE THEY?  Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck.  Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care.  

Life can get on your nerves—have you noticed? Tolerations are those things that aren’t TERRIBLE, but they definitely grate on you. And they don’t bring joy. Think of gossipy friends, squeaky chairs, jobs that drain the life out of you. Debi and Suzanne discuss how to deal with ‘tolerations’, including: The 50-50 question Can tolerations be our teacher? The secret to letting go of that which we’re only tolerating Manifesting 101 What Debi learned about manifesting from her daughter’s heart transplant “Life figured it out for me,” Debi said… May this contribute to your overflowing joy! Debi & Suzanne WHO ARE THEY?    WHO ARE THEY?  Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck.  Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care.  

Have you ever stopped to notice, when you’re about to go on a furious tear, that you may be reliving old emotions from the past? No… well, yeah. Very few of us actually have. Yet triggers are actually what’s likely at play. In this show we talk about our various trigger insights, accumulated through collective decades of being triggered. We share: A few stories from the past Some useful tools that can help with being triggered Ideas on what road rage is actually all about A nifty martial arts trick Words on the question of responsibility A really good journaling exercise May this show serve you well! Suzanne and Debi LINKS Suzanne’s YouTube Channel The Conscious Girlfriend website (originator of the SCORE method) https://consciousgirlfriend.com/free-stuff/

Nothing is worse than not being able to sleep! Debi and Suzanne knock it around on the fraught subject of tossing and turning. They share their very best tips of fighting insomnia including Best sleep tips How to manage waking up in the night What to do when your mind keep racing Various supplements and things that really work May this help keep you well rested… and not lying awake! For surely, this is a path back to happiness. Best from both of us! Suzanne and Debi WHO ARE THEY? Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck. Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care.  

What is at the heart of the mother-daughter relationship… and how does it affect us? In this show, we take a good clear look at our own relationships with our mothers (very different!), as well as with our daughters. For what’s here is nothing but unvarnished love. And it can be healing, indeed! Among other things, we covered: The story of Teal and Amera, our daughters Dealing with our daughter’s pushback The heart of love in motherhood What the moment was like when Teal was born Girdles and Chanel No.5 vs farm dresses—our two moms An important lesson Debi learned from her mom However, you get along with your mother, there is nothing as foundational as your relationship with the person who gave birth to you. May you find some healing and inspiration here. Suzanne and her mother Debi and her mother Submitted with love, Debi and Suzanne RESOURCES Suzanne’s essay ‘Learning to Forgive My Difficult Mother’

Suzanne and Debi knock around the critical issue of boundaries by sharing stories from their own lives, childhoods and relationships. Once you learn to stop allowing life (and others) to walk all over, happiness is easier than you think! Among other things, we talked about: What to know about setting boundaries and why it doesn’t always feel good What you can do to set boundaries more easily What you’ll get from setting better boundaries Boundaries with moms How to know WHEN to set those boundaries May this inspire your own boundary setting, and lead to even greater happiness. Best to you! Suzanne and Debi WHO ARE THEY? Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck. Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care.  

It’s a long road to a life of serenity. Yet, it can be done no matter what your circumstances. In this show, we talk about lessons we’ve learned on how to finally calm down and become patient. We talk about: The patience of not needing to control outcomes The patience of allowing and acceptance Helpful inner thoughts on patience Learning patience with boundaries Learning patience with ourselves Toxic triggers that screw it all up Making requests …and so much more! May this show serve you well, friends. Much love! Suzanne and Debi WHO ARE THEY? Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck. Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care.  

No matter where you are or what you’re doing, moving around is going to help. Even if you’re dealing with a disability—and especially if you’re dealing with anxiety and depression. In this show, we share ways to get yourself moving and KEEP yourself moving. Studies show it’s essential to not only maintaining your health, but keeping your sanity together. And Debi shares about her own routines that make her especially glad that she keeps on movin’…. We talk about yoga, why Suzanne doesn’t ride my bike on the street, Debi’s FitBit, and her favorite YouTube dance workouts. Even what to do when the weather stinks. As ever, submitted with a hug… Suzanne and Debi RESOURCES Misty Tripoli’s Body Groove Meredith Shirk’s One and Done Workouts Suzanne’s podcast on Zumba Funk Playlists on Spotify [LINK TO SPOTIFY] Funk Outta Here Funky Jams Suzanne’s R&B Band, Ruby’s in Town, funky dance parties online WHO ARE THEY? Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck.  Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care. 

In this show, we share some very good stories about how we’ve remembered those who’ve passed… and even heard from them. Here are some of the things discussed: Deb recalls the ritual around her Dad’s death Suzanne recalls ways she stayed in touch emotionally with her daughter after she passed Suzanne shares her movable altar to Teal Ways you can remember those who die… and heal in the process Suzanne shares some surprising stories about staying in touch with Teal Staying in touch with ‘the other side’ and what it takes Handing extreme stress… and how it effects your body Sent with a wish for much love and healing! Suzanne and Debi RESOURCES Grief Dreams podcast Living Your Joy Surrendering to Joy Suzanne’s favorite fiction audiobooks: The Peacock Emporium by JoJo Moyes The Friends We Keep by Jane Green Always the Last to Know by Kristin Higgins Debi’s favorite non-fiction audiobooks: You Are the Guru, Gabrielle Bernstein Buddhism for Beginners, Jack Kornfield The Year of Magical Thinking, Joan Didion Wayne Dyer's Ultimate Library Libby app Audible app WHO ARE THEY? Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck.  Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care. 

Just because I feel one way and you feel another…must we argue or even dislike each other? Hell no! We’re both advocates for all of us learning how to simply get along with each other. Especially now Among other things, we discussed: Why we encounter people who show up like roadblocks How we can cope with people who think differently The magic of being a good listener The power of not saying EVERYTHING on your mind Debi’s trick for not blurting out something that needs to not be said The powerful dream Teal showed up in about love and understanding …. And a cool new ‘Debi-ism’: Blappin’… as in blappin’ your jaws… Always fun to share and hear back from you, too. Send your comments to us at Suzanne AT suzannefalter.com and Debi AT suzannefalter.com Submitted, as ever, with love, Suzanne and Debi SOOTHING RESOURCES & LINKS Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women Podcast WHO ARE THEY?  Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck.  Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care.

It’s tricky, right? We need people. We’re fundamentally afraid of people, at least some of the time. Then someone reaches out and our day is made. Or maybe they don’t, and we stay stuck in our funk. We chat about various life breakthroughs we’ve had on the kindness train. This one’s an uplifting show… do hope you like it! Suzanne and Debi SOOTHING RESOURCES & LINKS Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women Podcast WHO ARE THEY?  Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck.  Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care.

So what does being kind ‘get’ you? Less time, perhaps some effort, maybe not even a thank you. Or… is it possible that you might actually seriously benefit from such actions?       - How Teal’s compassion taught Suzanne lesson about kindness How sharing an American flag with an elderly neighbor effected Debi Report from the front line and how compassion and kindness helps What both Debi and Suzanne learned from organ transplant professionals And so much more. Happy New Year, friend. Please take our thoughts and go forth in strength! Take care, Debi and Suzanne SOOTHING RESOURCES & LINKS Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women Podcast WHO ARE THEY?  Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck.  Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care.  

Debi tells the story of how she lost her home in the Camp fire in Paradise, one of the worst wildfires in California history. We’re airing because it contains some powerful lessons about happiness, and in some ways it was Debi’s Master Class. Rather than write a summary … take a listen and stay open. You’ll not only find yourself following along, one moment to the next, in an extremely well told story… you may find unexpected tears. And your own aha moment about your personal happiness.  May you find this useful. And may you have a wonderful New Year! Suzanne & Debi To send a question in for Suzanne and Debi to answer, please just pop them an email with ‘Question’ in the headline. Send to Suzanne@suzannefalter.com or debi@suzannefalter.com SOOTHING RESOURCES & LINKS Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women Podcast WHO ARE THEY? Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck.  Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care.  

Sometimes when you set boundaries, you find yourself stuck in an angry place. Or if you’re busy, or under pressure, or even living in tight quarters, you may not have the mental space to process your anger. This show is all about managing your anger in a healthy way. We welcome you to come on in, relax and let go of the burdens you may be carrying around. Got some anger? This one’s for you. All our best as ever, Suzanne and Debi

Divorce can traumatize children left in blended families—and vex families hoping for the best, but not getting it. Debi and Suzanne talk through their own experiences raising or being raised in blended families. They chat about: How Teal’s death effected the divorce between Suzanne and Teal’s dad How Debi’s ‘unexpected’ son enhanced her life as a single mom What being in a blended family taught each of us How we raised kids—or grew up – our own blended families Our life lessons philosophies And we answer a question about using affirmations. Debi talks about her unique breathing affirmation, even used in the dentist’s office. Suzanne shares a key question that can help anyone get their needs met. And we knock around this amazing topic…. Hope this helps YOU get back to happy today! Take a listen! Suzanne and Debi WHO ARE THEY?  Debi Granger is a true survivor. After nursed two of her children through life-or death experiences, she lost her home in Paradise, California after the worst wildfire in state history. She’s also a working single mom with a disability. Yet, she remains a happy optimist, here to spread joy. She is a retired Dental Assistant with Expanded Function, and lives in the foothills of the Sierras with her fiancé, Chuck.  Suzanne Falter is a writer, podcaster and essayist whose work has appeared in SELF, O, More, Fitness, New Woman and The New York Times, Tiny Buddha and Elephant Journal. She is the author of multiple self-help titles including How Much Joy Can You Stand? (Ballantine) and The Extremely Busy Woman’s Guide to Self-Care (Sourcebooks). Suzanne also hosts the Self-Care for Extremely Busy Women podcast where she interviews leading self-care authorities for those who need better self-care.  

Christophe Zajac-Denek is a successful podcaster, actor on shows like Twin Peaks, a drummer, stuntman and competitive surfer… and he happens to be a 4’4” dwarf. Listen as he shares with us in a beautiful, vulnerable show just what it’s like to be a little person in an average-sized world. In speaking, we learned: The realities of living in an average height world when you are a 4’4” man The hard things about being a dwarf actor Where little people get their confidence Stories from his childhood Why he’s a surfer (even though he’s from Detroit) How he’s gotten along with the Southern California ‘boy’s club’ of surf culture How he treats incidents of hate or social isolation The community around dwarfism, and how he came to join it What his dwarfism has taught him May you find this show as inspiring as we did! Suzanne & Debi RESOURCES I’m Kind of a Big Deal podcast on Apple Christophe’s website Christophe on LinkedIn MORE ABOUT CHRISTOPHE I'm an energetic and thoughtful individual who is genuinely curious by nature. I host and produce a podcast about people with dwarfism. The show is called I'm Kind of A Big Deal and creating it has given me the chance to connect with all types of different people, hone my recording chops, and creatively tell different people's stories. I come from a wide-ranging background ranging from touring musician, TV producer, actor/stuntman/entertainer, and project manager. Let's just say I've dipped my toes in several different ponds and they've all been fun and rewarding. Especially the time I landed a villainous role in David Lynch's Twin Peaks!