Ballot - Where Politics Meets Pop Culture

A Florida radio station goes full MAGA as “Trump Country 93.7” and triples its ratings. Cracker Barrel’s $700 million rebrand crashes harder than grandma’s biscuits. And Supreme Court justices remind America that two terms means… two. Plus, why “Trump 2028” hats might be the punchline of the week. All that and more on Ballot.

President Trump tries to prove D.C. is safe with a crab dinner—protesters say otherwise. Apple unveils the wafer-thin iPhone Air and a sleep-shaming Apple Watch. And doctors battle government red tape over who should get the COVID vaccine. It’s politics, tech, and medical drama with a side of sarcasm on Ballot.

Trump says he didn’t write Epstein’s 2003 birthday letter and definitely didn’t draw the woman’s silhouette on it. The signature looks familiar, Democrats are giddy, and the White House suddenly wants forensic CSI on speed dial.

Patrick Gutfield breaks down the Supreme Court's decision to allow Trump's controversial immigration enforcement in California, investigates the mystery blue pill Trump was caught taking at the U.S. Open (spoiler: the internet has theories), and covers West Point's decision to cancel Tom Hanks' award ceremony because apparently Forrest Gump is too "woke" for our military academy. Plus, why attending a tennis match with Trump is harder than getting through airport security during the holidays.

House Speaker Mike Johnson claims Trump was secretly working as an FBI informant against Jeffrey Epstein, while the administration focuses on revoking Rosie O'Donnell's citizenship and dealing with swollen ankle diplomacy. Plus: that time Navy SEALs killed shellfish divers in North Korea.

Patrick Gutfield dives into the Senate Finance Committee showdown where Robert F. Kennedy Jr. tried to defend firing the CDC director and gutting vaccine funding — and somehow ended up nominating Trump for a Nobel Peace Prize. Meanwhile, the NBA is investigating the Clippers for allegedly funneling $28 million to Kawhi Leonard through a tree-planting company, and survivors of Jeffrey Epstein demand the Trump administration release the long-buried Epstein files. Chaos, contradictions, and conspiracies — all in one episode.

Gavin Newsom claims foreign leaders are laughing behind Trump's back, and we've got the UN footage to prove it. Trump responded by staying up until 2 AM frantically Googling dirt on Governor Wes Moore because Moore called his memory "comical." But the real bombshell came when MAGA Congressman Mike Collins casually admitted Trump is probably in the Epstein files - then tried to spin it as Trump being the hero whistleblower. We break down the international mockery evidence, Trump's late-night revenge posting, and how his own supporters accidentally became his worst enemies.

Patrick Gutfield breaks down Trump's chaotic return to public life - from moving Space Command to Alabama because Colorado uses mail-in ballots, to casually mentioning shooting at Venezuelan drug boats, to contradicting his own staff about viral footage of trash bags being thrown from White House windows. Plus, the Epstein files finally dropped with 33,295 pages nobody's read yet. All this while Trump insists he's perfectly healthy and definitely not an AI-generated robot clone.

JD Vance says he's ready to be President after seven months of watching Trump work - that's less time than most people need to figure out their new job's healthcare benefits. Meanwhile, a TikTok physical therapist diagnosed Trump with six months to live through his phone screen, and Health Secretary RFK Jr. thinks he can spot children's mitochondrial problems just by people-watching at airports. We dive into Vance's NFL conspiracy theories about Taylor Swift rigging games for Travis Kelce, Trump's mysterious hand bruises covered with makeup, and why our government apparently runs on social media medical advice and supernatural airport diagnosis powers.

Patrick Gutfield skips the Labor Day chaos and dives into a different kind of American madness: Attorney General Pam Bondi calling Trump “President” like it’s his first name, New Jersey towns suing a mall for letting people buy pants on Sundays, and blue whales going silent because they’re starving. Also: Marco Rubio has four jobs now, Paramus wants your denim outlawed, and God’s fine with roller coasters but not sweaters. Oh, and whales—giant, starving, silent whales. This is Ballot.

From mass resignations at the CDC to Trump’s bizarre idea of holding national party conventions before the midterms, things in D.C. are getting weird. Patrick Gutfield breaks down RFK Jr.’s attempt to fire CDC Director Susan Monarez, the total reshuffling of the vaccine advisory committee, and why doing things that are illegal and anti-science seem to be this administration’s favorite hobby. Plus: Jen Psaki warns Trump could rig the next election, thanks to the appointment of conspiracy theorist Heather Honey to Homeland Security. And yes, we’re just as concerned about her name as you are.

Trump rage-posts about Seth Meyers at two AM like your weird uncle arguing about traffic lights on Facebook. Former SNL cast member Beck Bennett reveals Elon Musk was somehow worse to work with than Donald Trump - and that's saying something. Plus, Trump's team insists he's "inexhaustible" while photoshopping his swollen ankles out of official White House photos. And the President of the United States personally intervened to save Uncle Herschel from corporate rebranding hell at Cracker Barrel. Because apparently that's what passes for foreign policy these days.

Patrick Gutfield breaks down Trump's surprising blessing of the Swift-Kelce engagement, the administration's catchy new names for detention centers (from "Alligator Alcatraz" to "Cornhusker Clink"), Vanity Fair's staff meltdown over a potential Melania cover, JD Vance's creative take on World War Two history, and America's first case of screwworm - because nothing says "welcome to Twenty Twenty Five" like flesh-eating parasites and government trolling.

Marc Maron took aim at Bill Maher on Pod Save America, calling him “desperate” and accusing him of chasing relevance at any cost. Meanwhile, ICE accidentally turned a routine arrest photo into the internet’s latest thirst trap, Donald Trump threatened to revoke ABC and NBC’s FCC licenses over “fake news,” and RFK Jr. is reportedly plotting a COVID-19 vaccine ban. All that and more with Patrick Gutfield.

Cracker Barrel ditches grandma’s kitchen vibes for a sleek new logo, and the internet unleashes its full fury. Trump reportedly freaked out over clean sheets, locked his own bedroom door against the Secret Service, and possibly hides the Epstein Files under his mattress. MSNBC accuses him of ankle concealment, and the White House hilariously plays along. Meanwhile, a federal judge shuts down Florida’s “Alligator Alcatraz” detention center… because you can’t build a prison in a swamp and pretend it’s not federal.