Battle Red Blog: for Houston Texans fans

Andre Johnson has 1,062 career receptions, 14,185 receiving yards, and 70 touchdowns, he was named to 7 Pro Bowls and 2 All-Pro teams, and won two playoff games over the course of his 14 year NFL career, but despite all of his accomplishments, he had never been on Battle Red Radio. That changed today. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, I spoke with Andre Johnson about what it’s like playing through a tough season like the one Houston is going through, the jealousy he has for Texans wide receivers who get to play with Deshaun Watson, A.J. Brown comparisons, if there is anyone else he wished he punched, the difference in the coaching styles between Gary Kubiak and Bill O’Brien, future coaching desires, and a current offense that he would love to be able to play in. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Words are useless. They're finite and boring. They describe a thing, but they aren't the thing itself. I don't care about these silly little marks anymore. No. What I care about are feelings. How do you describe a feeling? You can't. You can say what the feeling is, but that's only a connection, a string that ties something to something itself. The word itself doesn't produce anything. It's empty. They all are. Feelings. That's what matters. That's what grand and wonderful and means something. So, go for a walk, press play, and feel the feeling, whatever that means, whatever this means, which if you're still following along, means nothing at all. On this episode of Battle Red Radio Matt and his good friend Taylor preview Week Ten of the 2020 NFL season. Topics include: which young quarterback you'd build around once the globalists win and the great reset happens, how Houston can help repair their airplane while it travels in mid air, AFC South MaDnEsS, Nick Chubb running backwards for 200 yards against Houston, Josh Allen being better than Russell Wilson now (sorry I don't make the rules, I only delve in facts), and Teddy Bridgewater blasphemy. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Imagine tackling Derrick Henry. Imagine standing across from a man who is 6'3" and weighs 238 pounds and can run 40 yards in 4.54 seconds, and now he has the football, and now he just cutback behind a power scoop and is rampaging right at you, and now, there he is, just you and a rhinoceros, except you don't have a high caliber rifle, instead, all you have is your own skeleton, your heart, and your shoulders wrapped in pads, and it's up to to bring down this horned ungulate all on your own. Some people envy professional athletes. I don't. I can't wait to go to work tomorrow and sit in my new chair I just got from Costco. I'm so happy I'm not Eric Murray, or Zach Cunningham, or Tyrell Adams, or Brennan Scarlett. I'm so happy to be myself. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt Weston, Carlos Flores, Scott, and Joe review the Texans absolutely absurd loss to the Tennessee Titans. Topics include: Romeo Crennel's fourth down decision, the Texans new super cool Tim Kelly offense, where we stand with David Johnson, Derrick Henry's crown, Houston's pass defense problems, players who could be possibly moved at the trade deadline, and of course, your beautiful and wonderful listener questions. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

With COVID-19 forcing the NFL to maneuver the NFL Schedule around, we've been having football in an assortment of positions we've never thought about. Monday at 4 p.m. Monday at 6:30 p.m. You thought Thursday Night football was fun, well how about TUESDAY NIGHT FOOTBALL where cursing is not only permitted, but it's encouraged, and pants are only for Jesuits and children, and it's way past their bedtime. So, in honor of this tradition, the podcast has now moved to THURSDAY NIGHT. Who knows when it will be next week? How about WEDNESDAY NIGHT? On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt and his good friend Taylor preview Week Six of the 2020 NFL season. Topics include: Houston and Tennessee incest, bringing the 1990s back on Monday Night Football, letting Andy be Andy, Green Bay finally playing a great defense, Josh Allen's triplex with Aaron Rodgers and Patrick Mahomes, and feisty upset picks. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

What do you do when the things you’ve always dreamed of arrive? What do you do when those fascinations spinning around your head under the spinning ceiling fan bear fruit, when grand fantasies become reality, when an envisioned version of reality becomes actuality? You open the roof. Praise the beating sun. And cherish your favorite football team kicking the hell out of the Jacksonville Jaguars. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt Weston, Carlos Flores, and Joe review the Texans very beautiful win over the Jacksonville Jaguars. Topics include: the difference in the Texans week five offense compared to weeks one through four, Deshaun Watson’s return to be being Deshaun Watson, the emergence of Brandin Cooks, hopes for David Johnson, if the defensive performance was pyritic, and what win-loss hopes are realistic for the future. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's the time of year for goblins, ghosties, and ghoulies, that turn your spine into jellies. Bronze light. Cinnamon entrances to the grocery store. Rotten gut alcohol. Broomsticks and hockey masks. It's still 97 degrees. And Bill O'Brien couldn't even make it to Halloween. Ah, that resounding joy, that infinite feeling, we have our football team back, and we are all one again. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt and his good friend Taylor preview Week Five of the 2020 NFL season. Topics include: best of the 0-4 and 4-0, the next head coach of the University of Texas Bill O'Brien, SmoothGrandmaa's listener questions, the importance of Myles Jack this weekend, if Andy Dalton can take Taylor to the moon, the number one defense in the league, Doug Pederson survival man, and the CHAD Justin Herbert, Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Seven years. Seven. Seven years. And it all has come to an end now that Cal McNair has pulled the plug on the Bill O’Brien era. Death isn’t the end, it’s not something to fear, it’s the goal, a cause for celebration, a time for nine person podcasts, twelve packs of malt liquor, a new haircut, and an excuse to put on that suit that doesn’t fit anymore. Finally. It’s over. The nightmare is over. We all have our favorite football team back again. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt Weston, Diehard Chris, Joe, Carlos Flores, Uprooted Texan, and Scott (L4blitzer) square dance on the end of the Bill O’Brien era. Topics include: why Bill O’Brien was fired, his lasting legacy, what his biggest downfall was, how he fared as a head coach compared to as a general manager, possible head coaching candidates, if this will be a highly sought after job, where do the Texans go from here this season, and of course, your wonderful and beautiful listener questions. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

It's year S7even of the Bill O'Brien era. Seven (!!!!!) years. And still, after seven years, after taking over playcalling duties once again, the Houston Texans failed to attack the Vikings' deep pass defense, played a ball control offense until falling behind, and still got exactly what they wanted, a close game where they could win the game at the very end. This week they didn't. After three run attempt failures, Will Fuller dropped an almost game tying touchdown catch, the same type of catch DeAndre Hopkins has made at least 15 times while he was in Houston. As a result, the Houston Texans lost another close game. They're 0-4. The season is effectively over. But, hey, at least Gary Kubiak got his REVENGE. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt Weston and Joe review the Texans loss to the Minessota Vikings and their 0-4 start. Topics include: ranting about the Houston Texans offense (sorry, I'm no Seth Payne), why Bill O'Brien's playcalling was atrocious, if Deshaun Watson is regressing, where was Brandin Cooks, J.J. Watt not being J.J. Watt, the secondary's struggles against Justin Jefferson and Adam Thielen, Bill O'Brien's end, and of course, your beautiful and wonderful listener questions. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The 2020 and 2018 Houston Texans are tethered together. The 2020 Houston Texans, like the 2018 Houston Texans, have started the season 0-3. In 2018, the Texans lost to New England, the Blaine Gabbert led fake punt touchdown passing Tennessee Titans, and the Eli Manning-Odell Beckham Jr. combination. They then proceeded to win nine straight games, and the AFC South, until losing at home to the Colts in the Wildcard round of the NFL playoffs. This version of the Houston Texans have their crowbar ready, and are trying to claw themselves out of the same crypt. So, let’s have ourselves a bean party, hike around the Canadian Rockies, make a Halloween trip to Vegas, and lay on the couch hungover, and do the things we did back then, because once again, it’s time to party like it’s 2018 all over again. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt Weston and BigFatDrunk review the Texans loss to the Pittsburgh Steelers and their 0-3 start. Topics include: Houston’s successful first half offensive attack, Deshaun Watson’s Pro Fartball Focus rating, Tim Kelly’s second half insatiable ESTABLISH THE RUN LUST, things we liked and didn’t like about Anthony Weaver’s defense, what 0-3 means, and of course, your beautiful and wonderful listener questions. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

See, this is more than a podcast. These are more than words. This is more than a conversation between friends who love each other as much as they love the game of football. This is a real cool place for real cool people to hang out while they do real cool things. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt and his good friend Taylor preview Week Three of the 2020 NFL season. Topics include: new screams, our producer’s new favorite segment SMOOTHGRANDMAA’S questions, praying for Deshaun Watson, Josh Allen’s 415 yard game, the same old same old from the Dallas Cowboys, and if Kansas City and Baltimore can rise above business casual in the BIGGEST game of the year. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt Weston hangs out online with Ike Taylor, former 12 year veteran with the Pittsburgh Steelers, to talk about the 2020 Steelers. Topics include: Pittsburgh’s decision to trade for Minkah Fitzpatrick, Mike Hilton’s emergence in the secondary, Vince Williams blitzes, Big Ben Roethlisberger’s BIG picture, the potential of Pittsburgh’s offense, Ike’s thoughts on why the Houston Texans are struggling, and his pick for this Sunday’s game between the Houston Texans and Pittsburgh Steelers. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The Kansas City Chiefs and Baltimore Ravens improved this offseason. The Houston Texans didn’t. In fact, they got worse, by turning DeAndre Hopkins into Brandin Cooks and David Johnson and a slight draft capital jump to take Ross Blacklock, by adding only Eric Murray to one of the league’s worst defenses, and by losing D.J. Reader and Tashaun Gipson. Because of this 0-2 isn’t unreasonable. Losing to the same teams that clubbed them in blowouts last year was expected. Yet, the general ennui, the listlessness, the emptiness, surrounding these losses and the abysses they were played in are what’s different. 0-2 isn’t surprising. The nothingness is. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt Weston, and Joe Critz review Week Two between the Houston Texans and Baltimore Ravens. Topics include the inevitable 0-2 start, Houston’s offensive struggles, easy sources of offensive generation, Deshaun Watson’s performance, the difference Anthony Weaver has made, some things to like, and, of course, your beautiful and wonderful listener questions. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Look at us now. After a summer indoors, what a sick air conditioned nightmare that was, where nothing was certain, the NFL got through one week of the 2020 NFL Season, and will play another week of football. Look at that! That’s good, even if Houston is probably going to start 0-2 with a murderous game against the ravenous Baltimore Ravens. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt and his good friend Taylor preview Week Two of the 2020 NFL season. Topics include a Tre’Quan Smith update, Smooth Grandmaa’s questions, how ugly Houston v. Baltimore can get, the stupid Dallas Cowboys and their stupid 4th and 3 failure, Kyler Murray sack dodging, being happy that Cam is happy, and a shoutout to Bill Belichick who is definitely a loyal Battle Red Radio listener. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I want it all. I want to fill my cup all the way up. Dripping chalice. Devouring until I pop. Anything and everything around me. Whether it’s seven soggy cheese dogs, translucent skin, frozen lasagna, protein powder coffee, bean bongs, or NFL football, I’m irascible and terrible, and need to stop time, save the summer, so I’ll never have to put my floaties in the garage, and lose the scent of sunscreen again. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt and his good friend Taylor preview week one of the 2020 NFL season. Topics include: three big thoughts on Houston’s loss v. Kansas City, 2021 time traveling (get here already!!!), Baltimore’s improved run defense, who plays linebacker in Cleveland, Josh Allen’s deep ball, 84 years of quarterback, and Dallas tearing the ribbon off Los Angele’s new stadium. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Wait, I thought you liked football? I thought the Texans were going to put 37 on the Kansas City Chiefs, Randall Cobb was going to exploit the center of the field, the offensive line was going to lock down Kansas City’s pass rush, the pass defense was going to bounce back thanks to internal development, and if the game was close, Deshaun Watson would be able to pull off the miracles necessary, like a Saint George figure, to slay the dragon once again. None of this happened. The Texans are still the Texans. And they still run the ball up the middle, pick and pop, pick their shots downfield (and didn’t even really thrown downfield this game), want to play ball control, and don’t have the horses to stop offenses like Kansas City. It’s all good though. It’s only one week. What’s the worst that can happen? On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt Weston, Carlos Flores, and Joe Critz review Week One between the Houston Texans and Kansas City Chiefs. Topics include: Tim Kelly’s extreme vertical offense, the bouncing David Johnson, that one really pretty touchdown drive, the same pass defense woes, the existential crisis the run defense faces, and what we gleamed from Anthony Weaver’s first game. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

After nine months of waiting, the Houston Texans have finally broken free from the iron bars of the calendar, and head up to Kansas City to enact their revenge on last season’s disintegration. After giving up 41 straight points and blowing a 24 point first half lead, Houston begins the season refreshed and anew by chasing after those demons that devoured them in January’s mustard drenched hell. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt Weston and BigFatDrunk preview week one between the Houston Texans and Kansas City Chiefs. Topics include: how Houston should attack Kansas City's defense, the difficulties the Chiefs' secondary provides; what to expect, if you should expect anything from a Tim Kelly offense; how Houston will try and replace DeAndre Hopkins's targets against this opponent last season, the single coverage matchup advantage Houston's secondary has, J.J. Watt's usage, the wonky things that need to occur for the Texans to pull off the upset, and of course, your beautiful and perfect listener questions. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Last year, on the Saturday before Labor Day, Bill O’Brien traded two first round picks, a second round pick, and Julien Davenport, for Laremy Tunsil and Kenny Stills, and traded Jadeveon Clowney for Jacob Martin, a third round pick, and Barkevious Mingo. From now on, always and forever, the Saturday before Labor Day is Bill O’Brien day. And what a joyous Bill O’Brien day yesterday was. Deshaun Watson announced his contract extension, Keke Coutee and Kahale Warring made the 53 man roster, and Jadeveon Clowney signed with the Tennessee Titans to turn the Texans v. Titans rivalry on, and make it something more than a bad man moving his bad team to a different city. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt Weston and Carlos Flores discuss yesterday’s wonderful Bill O’Brien day. Topics include: Keke Coutee’s inclusion on the roster, Kahale Warring lust, what Houston’s plan is at offensive line, defensive line depth, the full cornerback room, A.J. Moore’s rise to safety number three, and Clowney’s decision to join Tennessee. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

After making AFC predictions, it's time to go National, spill the remains at the bottom of the tea kettle, open our fists, study the stars, and play soothsayer by discussing the NFC. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, for your wet and wild Labor Day weekend, Matt Weston and his good friend Taylor, discuss the NFC by making a prediction for every team. Topics include: Dallas Cowboys arguing, the Washington football team and their defensive line, Green Bay expectations, how to relive 2010, the wild and reckless NFC South, and Arizona eyeing the worst to first jump. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

The end of the summer, the summer that we never had is here. Dozens of men in Houston’s bubble, have been attending meanings, playing practice squad, working drill after drill with position groups, running ladders, moving sleds, and hitting one another, while fantasizing it was someone else. The sad truth, and the hard truth, is that after a month plus of exhausting work, a fourth of them will go home, sit, and wait for the phone to ring, while lifting weights in their garage and playing polygon football on a television laying on the floor. Most never will. Most have reached the end of their rope. Most will be names that we as fans may vaguely remember, and laugh about, while washing our hands in some far away gas station bathroom. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt Weston, Carlos Flores, and Kenneth L., chomp away at the Texans bloated roster, eat the dreams of roster hopefuls, and cut the entire thing down to a slim and final 53. Topics include: how many quarterbacks the Texans will carry into 2020, Keke Coutee’s future in Houston, if Kahale Warring will be more than sideline eye candy this season, who backs up the Texans already known starting offensive line, base defense configuration, passing down pass rushes, secondary analysis, and of course, your beautiful and wonderful questions. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

I always say, to understand the NFL, you must first understand the AFC South. After a month of interviews, discussions, film watching, number crunching, typing, and loving, the AFC South preview is complete, and now, from there, we can take off to look at the rest of the NFL entering the 2020 season. On this episode of Battle Red Radio, Matt Weston and his good friend Taylor, discuss the AFC by making a prediction for every team. Topics include: Adam Gase’s job security, if the Bengals can steal our hearts, surprising Houston Texans analysis, John Gruden’s extreme quarterback makeover, and your 2020 NFL rushing leader. Let’s start the show. While you’re at it, give it a five star review and subscribe below: You can subscribe/listen on iTunes here. You can subscribe/listen on Android/Google here. You can subscribe/listen on Spotify here. You can subscribe/listen on Stitcher here. Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices