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Two cynical Brits review the latest Film and TV releases and discuss all things inbetween. Loud rude and brutally honest. No in-podcast ads, no affiliate links, CINEMENTALIST is funded purely by donations and Premium Subscribers. Two Podcasts a week, one free with the big release reviews and one premium where we get all esoteric and review everything else, recommend and review the classics, and discuss all our favourite and least favourite picks and much more besides. Follow us @CINEMENTALCAST on Twitter and check out our Patreon if you'd like to support us at https://www.patreon.com/CINEMENTALIST. THANKS AND KISSES
110 Episodes
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A BUMPER CROP OF FUN. This week, after some movie chimp news, Liam takes things away with a look at the latest offering from Alex Garland, Men, before going all low-brow with a review of Rise of the Footsoldier: Origins. God help us all. Andy meanwhile has been watching all of Stranger Things. No spoiler review inside! 80's trivia for dessert. Sweet.
FEATURING
- CHIMPS AND ALAN CUMMINGS
- A WORLD WHERE MEN ARE ALL THE SAME. BASTARDS.
- VINNIE JONES AND THE MISSING ACCENT
- ANDY USES THE SAME PHRASE TWICE: BAD ANDY, BAD.
- FARTING FISH AND LIAMS CHILDHOOD PIE
SPIFFING. This week, a little earlier than usual due to some family commitments, CINEMENTALIST review three films! A whole three? And Early? You lucky devils you! Liam sets us off with a peek at the multiverse in Everything Everywhere all at Once, before an attack of a very different clone in a review of Dual. Andy meanwhile has decided there's no good TV this week, so it's time to get all British spy thriller with a take on 2001s Operation Mincemeat. Jolly good show old chap, and all of that. BULLY.
FEATURING
- A BAD INTRO, WITH ADDED DEATH!
- A MAN OPENS AN UMBRELLA IN AN ELEVATOR
- A FILM WASTES ITS OPPORTUNITIES, IRRITATES PODCAST HOST
- A TALE OF BRITISH DERRING-DO, WHAT WHAT
- WW2 SPY TRIVIA: AN ENDLESS MINE OF WONDER
DING DONG. Its CINEMENTALIST here, back with another dose of Film and TV review to massage your eardrums on a dreary Tuesday. That was a nice intro wasn't it? Lovely. This week, Liam kicks us off with a look at the latest Stephen King adaption, Firestarter, with predictable results, before getting all dark humour with a review of On the Count of Three. TV of the week? Why, its Pieces of Her of course! The full Andy verdict inside.
FEATURING
- WE DEBATE RECORDING OUR LOCAL PUB
- FIRESTARTER: WHY NOT MAKE IT GOOD INSTEAD?
- A DARK COMEDY TICKLES LIAM
- BAD CHARACTERS PLAYED BY GOOD ACTORS: ALWAYS BLOODY DIFFICULT
- SOME TRIVIA BECAUSE WE DO THAT
A podcast you say? Films and TV you say? With two cheeky Brits? Well sign me up! This week, Liam kicks off our reviews section with some lovely nuns in a look at Paul Verhoeven's Benedetta, before giving Michael Bay a good kicking in a review of Ambulance. Or does he? MYSTERIES ABOUND. Andy meanwhile has been kicking around good old LANDAN with a review of Apple TVs Slow Horses. ACCENTS INCOMING.
FEATURING
- PAUL VERHOEVEN MAKES A DIRTY MOVIE
- MICHAEL BAY FILMS SOME EXPLOSIONS
- GARY OLDMAN IS VERY GOOD
- OTHER REVEALS THAT MAY NOT SURPRISE YOU
- MI5 TRIVIA OR: HOW WE GOT SCRUBBED FROM THE INTERNET
BACK AGAIN OH MY GOODNESS WE MISSED YOU. Yes, CINEMENTALIST returns with your two favourite foul-mouthed British media reviewers going head to head on...all sorts of stuff! This week, Liam kicks us off with two huge reviews, The Unbearable Weight of Massive Talent and The Northmen, with some surprising results. Andy meanwhile, fresh back from his holidays, decides its time to listen to some tapes. Marily Monroe: The Unheard Tapes and Conversations with a Killer: John Wayne Gacy reviewed inside. BOY OH BOY WHAT CONTENT.
FEATURING
- A NEWS SECTION THAT NEARLY WASNT
- NIC CAGE GETS ALL METAVERSE
- A VIKING WITH PACING ISSUES: HOW EMBARRASSING
- TWO VERY DIFFERENT DOCS BOUND UP IN TAPE
- MONROE TRIVIA: REALLY FUCKING CREEPY EDITION
OLA! This week, before Andy heads out for the great beyond, we settle some unfinished business. Liam kicks us off with a review of The Outfit, before going all zombie but not with a look at The Sadness. Andy meanwhile has been plunging his head into the toilet of dispair that is Jimmy Saville: A British Horror Story, before serving up a nice palate cleanser with a review of Return to Space. A PODCAST OF CONTRASTS.
FEATURING
- IT WOULDN'T BE CHICAGO WITHOUT AL CAPONE
- GORE VIOLENCE AND HORROR: LIAM IS A HAPPY BUNNY
- THE WORLDS WORST HUMAN BEING: A DOCUMENTARY
- ELON MUSK AND THE CONFLICTED FEELINGS
- MUSKY TRIVIA ABOUT THE MUSK
THE ANGRY PODCAST FEAT. UTRED SON OF UTRED. This week, after some film news that displeases us both, Liam kicks in to a review of Morbius. Oh boy oh boy. Prepare yourselves. Oh and Honey Boy, in which Shia Lebeefy gets all personal. TV of the week? The Last Kingdom: The Last Season, and Bridgerton Season 2. YES.
FEATURING
- THE NEWS IN WHICH WE HATE THE NEWS
- DOES JARED LETO REDEEM HIMSELF? NO.
- HONEY HONEY, WHY DO I LOVE YOU SO
- UTRED SON OF UTRED, AN ARSELING TILL THE END
- A SENSE OF DEJA VU...
THE RETURN OF THE LIAM. He's back! Yes, your favourite British arseholes return with yet more news, reviews and, y'know, British. This week, Liam kicks us off with a look at THE BATMAN (it looks better in all-caps doesnt it?) before making some adult movies in the woods with a review of X. Speaking of porn, Andy has been digging into the deep and dirty with a look at Pam and Tommy. Gosh its all very sexy this week isnt it? Super.
FEATURING
- DONT ASK ABOUT LIAMS HOLIDAY
- THE BATMAN IS A BATMAN FILM ABOUT BATMAN BEING BATMAN
- A DODGY TEXAS ACCENT AND SOME SUPRISING HEART
- ANDY GOES LOOKING FOR DIRT AND COMES UP WITH GOLD
- BATMAN TRIVIA OR: BEATING ROBIN TO DEATH WITH A CROWBAR
FRESH MEAT. This week, after our usual discussion of the latest film news (in which Liam forgets about the existence of Saving Private Ryan, and Andy gets his hopes up for yet another Alien film that's going to be rubbish), we kick things off with reviews of Fresh and Cyrano. TV of the week? Why it's those cheeky chappies the Vikings of course, except this time they're in Valhalla. Wait that's not right. It's one of those Sword-em-ups anyway. CANNIBAL TRIVIA TO FINISH OOOOH.
FEATURING
- ANDY THINKS IT MIGHT BE A GOOD ALIEN FILM, SO ITS GOING TO BE CRAP
- THE FORBIDDEN MEAT
- A SUPRISE MUSICAL RUINS EVERYTHING
- SOME VIKINGS WAIT FOR A BUS
- A LOVELY CINEMENTALIST CAMPFIRE TALE: ITS ABOUT CANNIBALS!
ITS THE MISERABLE BASTARD PODCAST. Yes this week, after a look at the latest film announcements and news, Liam kicks us off with a look at No Sudden Move, before going all witchy with a look at Hellbender. Andy meanwhile has been watching the latest Netflix smash hit, Inventing Anna. He has opinions. Oh so many of them. Benecio Del Toro trivia to finish, because we finally had an excuse to. Yes.
FEATURING
- A RAMBLING NEWS SECTION WE KNOW YOU LOVE THOSE
- A MISSING DOCUMENT AND AN ALL STAR CAST
- SPONTANEOUS COMBUSTION: FUN
- A WOMAN MANAGES TO CON A TV SHOW: ANDY SAYS SPEARED A LOT
- DEL TORO AND THE WEIGHT OF TOMMY LEE JONES
OH YES ITS US. This week, Liam takes great lengths to explain the meaning of Licorice Pizza, before taking on a Netflix film (here we go again) requel, sequel.....thing with a look at Texas Chainsaw Massacre. Yes its new. No we don't know why either. Meanwhile Andy has been brushing up on his Finnish and failing miserably with a review of Bordertown, in which a genius detective is all detectivey and clever. Heartwarming Finn trivia to finish, with an unexpected diversion.....
FEATURING
- WE MENTIONED IT ONCE, BUT WE THINK WE GOT AWAY WITH IT
- VINYL WILL NEVER LOOK THE SAME AGAIN
- LEATHERFACE LOOKS ILL
- A PERFORMANCE OF A LIFETIME
- AN UNEXPECTED DISCUSSION OF BATHROOM HABITS
100 EPISODES! Yes, we've been around far longer than you expected. No we are not stopping. THE CINEMENTALIST TRAIN CONTINUES. This week, Liam dusts off his old fedora and heads for the cinema for a look at Uncharted, before getting all dark and interesting (us? Never!) with a review of Catch the Fair One. Andy meanwhile has been in space with an old friend....two of them actually, with a review of The Book of Boba Fett. WE'RE HERE, WE REVIEW STUFF, GET USED TO IT. Please.
FEATURING
- 100 EPISODES AND A WOKE DRAGON
- TOM HOLLAND JUMPS AROUND A LOT FOR REASONS
- A BOXER THAT CAN ACT, AND OTHER SUCH SURPRISES
- THE BOOK OF BOBA FETT OR: A SHOW HIDDEN WITHIN ANOTHER SHOW
- LIAM REVEALS HIS FAVOURITE CURSE WORD. YES ITS THAT ONE. BRACE YOURSELVES.
OH BOY OH BOY ITS US. This week, after we thoroughly annoy both Joe Rogan and Bruce Willis (yes we are in mortal danger thanks for asking), Liam kicks us off with a review of silly men doing silly things in Jackass Forever, before getting all intriguing with a look at KIMI. Andy reveals he's been doing the documentary dance again, with rundowns on The Tinder Swindler and Real Detective. Feature packed? YOU BLOODY BET.
FEATURING
- CINEMENTALIST ANNOYS TWO TOUGH GUYS: COME AT ME BRO
- JACKASS FOREVER: SCARY SILLY
- ALEXA, MAKE ME A MOVIE. NO NOT MICKEY ROONEY YOU PIECE OF SH
- THE PERILS OF DATING A MAN WITH A PRIVATE JET
- GENERAL JACKASSERY AND A LAST MINUTE REVELATION
Hello, we are CINEMENTALIST and we are having a week! After some news, in which we decide the news is boring, Liam kicks us off with a review of Memoria, before going all action hero/bin-man with a look at Clean. Meanwhile, Andy has been watching The Woman who sits in The Window with her head up her....you know the one. HE HAS THOUGHTS AND OPINIONS LETS FIND OUT WHAT THOSE ARE.
FEATURING
- LIAM HATES THE NEWS
- A LOUD BANG IN COLUMBIA: NOT AS FUN AS IT SOUNDS
- ADRIAN BRODY WRITES THE THEME TUNE, SINGS THE THEME TUNE
- A PARODY STRUGGLES TO DECIDE IF ITS A PARODY
- UNEXPLAINED NOISES OR: ALTERNATIVE TITLES FOR THIS PODCAST
A BIG ONE. This week, after an intro that a certain pretentious bell-end will not enjoy, we take on some of the biggest hitters available for your viewing pleasure! Liam breaks out the popcorn with reviews of The Matrix: Resurrections and Nightmare Alley, before Andy straps on his Korean space-suit and takes a lovely trip to the moon in a review of The Silent Sea. ARE YOU EXCITED I'M EXCITED.
FEATURING
- JARED LETO WONT LISTEN TO THIS: PROBABLY FOR THE BEST
- A REBOOT BLOWS OUR MINDS: ALSO BLOWS IN GENERAL
- THE AMAZING ELECTRIC WOMAN
- KOREAN SPACE HORROR - UPSIDE DOWN SPACESHIPS
- THE MOON IS SHRINKING - TRULY THE END TIMES
BRACE YOURSELF, ITS US AGAIN. This week, after Liam expresses displeasure at his new title and we deliver your usual dose of film news, we kick things off with reviews of two cinematic big-hitters, Scream and The Tragedy of Macbeth. Andy meanwhile takes on the latest Netflix hit, Stay Close, and finds that its weird. I mean, really, really weird. Fun!
FEATURING
- LAST MINUTE TITLE CHANGES: CINEMENTALIST DISAPPROVES
- META STABBY STABBY IS OK, AUDIENCE SHOCKED
- A BIT OF CULTURE FOR ONCE
- GRIMY POLICE THRILLER MEETS NEON FEVER DREAM - WHAT
- SHAKESPEARE TRIVIA BECAUSE WE'RE HIGHBROW NOW
GUESS WHO GOT THE ALL CLEAR. Yes, we are back, feeling positive, testing negative, and fighting fit....sort of. This week, Liam has an awkward conversation in a review of Mass, and recieves a lovely surprise in the form of Last Looks. Andy meanwhile has been watching regular old telly while slowly dying on his sofa, but The Tourist was on, so I guess he's reviewing that. AUSTRALIA TRIVIA TO FINISH I TELL YOU WHAT.
FEATURING
- WE'RE BACK, AND SLIGHTLY FUCKED
- A FILM ABOUT SCHOOL SHOOTINGS: A CHEERY SUBJECT
- MEL GIBSON DOES A BRITISH ACCENT, AND I NEED TO SEE THIS FILM
- TWO PLANKS OF WOOD SPOIL OTHERWISE GOOD SHOW
- G'DAY MATE, AND OTHER WAYS TO MAKE AUSTRALIANS HATE YOU
Hello! Yes, we are still alive, and yes, we are recovering nicely, although still testing positive which is wonderful WHEN DOES IT BLOODY END. In the meantime, why not enjoy an episode recorded before the super-flu invaded our systems. A simpler time, when Liam reviewed Rose Plays Julie and The Ghoul, and Andys biggest concern was whether the second season of The Witcher was any good. MEMORIES.
FEATURING
- PRE-FLU BANTER REMEMBER THAT
- REFERENCES TO WHAT A LOVELY NEW YEAR IT WAS GOING TO BE
- TWO HEAVY FILMS FROM LIAM ISNT THAT NICE
- ANDY GOES ALL SWORDS AND SORCERY REMEMBER THAT
- HEALTH: TURNS OUT ITS UNDERATED
MERRY FOOKIN XMAS. Welcome to Schrodingers Christmas Episode, in which we both discuss quite a lot of the holiday season and also review media that has absolutely nothing to do with it, because we're CINEMENTALIST and we do stuff like that. Fun! This week, Liam gets his teeth into House of Gucci, before going all horror with a look at The Dark and the Wicked, in which there are no jingle bells indeed. Andy meanwhile has been busying himself with some docu-entertainment, with reviews of Dig Deeper: The Disappearance of Birgit Meier, Tiger King 2 and Tiger King: The Doc Antle story. Chestnuts roasting on an open fire....
FEATURING
- A CHRISTMAS EPISODE, AND YET, NOT
- ITALIAN ACCENTS GONE WILD
- THE SCARY AND THE SCARIER
- A GERMAN DETECTIVE AND SOME TIGER NUTS
- XMAS TRIVIA: AND NOW I'VE RUINED THE SURPRISE
OH LOOK ITS CINEMENTALIST. This week, after an apology for illness, we crack on with all the latest film news and reviews! FIrst up, Liam has a lovely plate of Lamb to share with you all, before a look at Bendydick Cumberwangs latest, The Power of the Dog. Andy meanwhile has been mostly deaf for the past week, so eschews his usual TV spot for a look at a little documentary called Voyeur. Close your curtains. He's out there.
FEATURING
- AN APOLOGY WE LOVE THOSE
- THE BODY OF A GIRL, THE HEAD OF A SHEEP. YES.
- BENEDICT CUMBERBATCH APPEARS OUT OF FUCKING NOWHERE
- PEEKING THROUGH WINDOWS: STILL BETTER THAN BEING AN ARSE
- CUMBERTRIVIA. FOR THE CUMBERFANS.
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