Claim OwnershipCharting Toward Intimacy
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Looking for answers to the questions you don't want to Google? Not sure where to get help when your sexual life is on the rocks and everything the secular culture has to offer is only making things worse? Welcome to Charting Toward Intimacy where you learn to actually enjoy and desire good, holy sex with your spouse.
Hosted by Ellen Holloway, Catholic Sex and Intimacy Coach.
175 Episodes
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In this episode, Ellen and Kathleen delve into the distinction between Natural Family Planning (NFP) and contraception, addressing common questions and concerns from a Catholic perspective. They explore the theological significance of sex, the church's stance on NFP versus contraception, and how these practices reflect one's relationship with God's will. The discussion covers the physical and spiritual aspects of marital intimacy, the importance of responsible parenthood, and the role of pray...
In this episode Ellen discusses how couples can handle differing levels of comfort with sexual acts. She emphasizes the importance of communication, respecting each other's boundaries, and defaulting to the less comfortable spouse to maintain a loving and trusting relationship. She provides guidance on how to navigate situations where one partner is uncomfortable, suggesting that saying no is an opportunity for growth and deeper intimacy. The discussion includes how to handle uncomfortable si...
In this episode Ellen and Kathleen explore the topic of chastity within marriage, emphasizing that chastity goes beyond merely abstaining from sex. They discuss the deep and abundant grace available through the sacrament of marriage and how living out chastity can enhance marital intimacy and union. The conversation covers the Catechism's teachings on chastity for all baptized individuals, regardless of marital status. They debunk common misconceptions about chastity, highlighting its importa...
In this episode Ellen shares a personal revelation about finding God's presence and grace in the imperfections of married life and liturgical celebrations. Despite her initial frustration with less-than-perfect liturgies during the Easter Triduum, Ellen is reminded through prayer that God's grace is not limited by human imperfections. She draws a parallel between her experience with liturgies and the realities of married life, emphasizing that God works through the 'messiness' of both t...
This episode focuses on the common issue among couples regarding the disparity in sex drives, a topic frequently brought up by listeners. We propose a perspective shift, suggesting couples view these differences as blessings that can forward the relationship and increase intimacy. ___________________________________ Did we mention a book on this week's episode? Click here for our recommended books! Have a question you want to hear answered on a future podcast episode? Click Here to submi...
In this episode, the focus is on the church's teachings regarding manual stimulation and masturbation within the context of marriage. We'll go through basically all of the different scenarios of manual stimulation from masturbation to stimulating the other person. Get the Orgasm Course for Catholic Women at vinesinfullbloom.com/orgasm___________________________________ Did we mention a book on this week's episode? Click here for our recommended books! Have a question you want to hear ans...
In this episode of Charting Toward Intimacy, Ellen and Kathleen tackle the challenge of internalized purity culture and its impact on women's sexual thoughts. They discuss the phenomenon where healthy sexual desires within the context of marriage are mistakenly treated as intrusive thoughts due to purity culture's teachings. The discussion includes defining intrusive thoughts, sharing personal struggles with accepting sexuality, and the journey of healing the relationship with sex from the pe...
In this episode we'll address the misconception among individuals practicing Natural Family Planning (NFP) that their sexual desire only peaks during the fertile window due to hormonal influences. Listen in to see what you really need to change to experience more desire for sex!___________________________________ Did we mention a book on this week's episode? Click here for our recommended books! Have a question you want to hear answered on a future podcast episode? Click Here to submit q...
This episode addresses the complexities and challenges couples face regarding postpartum sex. The episode covers the expectations, fears, and physical changes women and their partners might experience, emphasizing the importance of communication, understanding, and patience. Techniques such as perineal massage and the use of lubricants are suggested to ease discomfort and anxiety during postpartum sexual activity. Additionally, discussions include men's perspectives on postpartum sex, the imp...
Ellen addresses the common pursuit of perfectionism in marriage and sexual relationships, emphasizing that perfection is not a prerequisite for intimacy or spiritual growth. She discusses how striving for a perfect relationship or sexual encounter can be paralyzing, whereas embracing the imperfection can lead to significant growth, healing, and a deeper bond. Trial, error, and grace-filled perseverance in sexual intimacy can transform and sanctify marriage.Get the Orgasm Course for Catholic W...
In this episode of 'Charting Toward Intimacy', Kathleen and Ellen discuss the misconception of sex being a love language. They explain that sex should be a result of love and intimacy rather than the base of it, and argue that using sex as the glue that holds a relationship together creates a false expectation and could become unfulfilling over time. The five love languages - words of affirmation, quality time, receiving gifts, acts of service, and physical touch - are examined, with the asse...
In this episode Ellen discusses the deep connection between sex and prayer. She implements the teachings of the Catechism, arguing that just as prayer cannot be reduced to spontaneous desire but requires an active will, sex should also not be reduced to spontaneous physical desire. She encourages listeners to recognize the depth of sexual relations as an experience of unity and not just physical satisfaction. She also stresses that desire for sex should be understood as a longing for deeper u...
This podcast, led by Ellen Holloway and Kathleen Chavones, discusses the challenges of sticking to Natural Family Planning (NFP) during instances of limited fertile days and mandatory abstinence due to serious medical or financial constraints. It emphasizes how suffering and sacrifice are crucial elements of the Christian journey. They tackle the often-perceived unfairness of NFP, clarifying how beliefs about God not wanting us to suffer are misleading. They argue that during these periods of...
This episode focuses on the emotional complexities of initiating sex within a Catholic marriage, emphasizing the importance of understanding individual desires and the associated vulnerabilities. Through an in-depth discussion, Ellen addresses various misconceptions about physical desire and urges couples to explore deeper emotional and spiritual desires and how it relates to sexual intimacy. Helpful strategies are suggested for initiating and responding to initiation in a loving, considerate...
Mike 'Gomer' Gormley joins host Ellen as they discuss the detrimental effects of sexual passivity on marriage and ways to overcome it. Gomer provides valuable insights from a male perspective, emphasizing the importance of sexual initiation, communication, respect, and genuine love in maintaining a healthy sex life and marriage. The duo takes a deep dive into topics such as the significance of non-sexual touch, misconceptions about male and female sexual drives, and the role of honest, non-ju...
In this podcast episode, Ellen addresses the challenge of navigating sex within a marriage, particularly from a Catholic perspective. She discusses a situation where a couple put such heavy emphasis on the religious significance of sex that it led to tension and avoidance, reducing their sexual encounters drastically. Ellen proposes that adding a sense of fun and lightness to one's sex life can relieve the pressure, fostering trust and openness between partners. This approach can be implement...
In this podcast Ellen, discusses the idea of women becoming gatekeepers of sex in a relationship, specifically within the context of a Catholic marriage and family planning. In conversation with guest Grace Stark, editor for Natural Womanhood, they suggest that the issue can be seen as an issue of communication rather than a power struggle. They discuss ways to foster stronger communication, and to share responsibility for family planning and initiating intimacy. Additionally, they delve into...
In this episode, hosts Ellen and Kathleen talk about lessons they wish they knew on their wedding night. They highlight the importance of open communication, and understanding the depth and holiness of sex within marriage, and how it goes beyond just fulfilling an urge. They emphasize the need to translate the intellectual understanding of the sanctity of sex to the heart. Both share their insights about how this realization has been a journey, requiring continual growth and wrestling with th...
In this episode, we discuss the common scenario of feeling too tired for marital intimacy. We'll talk about the importance of identifying the root cause, be it a heavy workload, miscommunication, or simply needing more sleep. Here's some of the big takeaways: understand each other's perspectives, engage in active communication, take a fresh look at sex, viewing it not as a chore but as a way to enhance intimacy and connection.Sex is vital in reinforcing the bond and renewing wedding vows, so ...
Ellen is joined by Dr. Sarah Bartel for part 2 of their conversation on licit and illicit acts. The episode focuses primarily on pornography, sex manuals, sex therapy, and imaginative role-play in marriage. They stress the importance of respecting both the unitive and procreative functions of sex in Catholic teaching.Please go listen to the episode prior to this one titled Sex Toys, Lingerie, and Orgasms, Oh My! with Dr. Sarah Bartel before listening to this follow up conversation.___________...
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