Chatabix

Barry Hearn, sport promoter and founder of Matchroom Sport is having trouble getting on the zoom call ! David tells Barry he used to be scared of him when he was 12. Barry tells them stories about boxing greats Mike Tyson and Frank Bruno but admits he was shite at boxing himself. Joe asks what the perfect night would look like as a boxing promoter. He says that a fight between David & Joe could potentially be a big seller. They find out that Barry is best mates with Steve Davis. so they tell him they hugged Steve at the Blur concert. Barry talks about his formative years, growing up on a council estate with short trousers, no money and his mum sending him to elecution lessons. He tells them about his route to success and how he got into the sport promotions world regaling them with funny stories from the golden age of snooker. They ask Barry if he's ever seen the mythical Chris Eubank painting of the Last Supper and are delighted when he confirms it's real ! Barry finishes the ep with some brilliant antidotes from the boxing ring. Read Barry's book My Life https://www.amazon.co.uk/Barry-Hearn-Knockouts-Snookers-Bullseyes/dp/1529393310 Merch: https://chatabixshop.com Twitter: https://twitter.com/chatabix1 Insta: https://www.instagram.com Patreon: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

In today's ep we play not one but two Christmas songs we've written for the festive season. David reads out all the names of the Patrons who recorded lyrics for the backing vocals. David & Joe realise they wouldn't cope well without their wives so they call them in to tell them they love them. Petra & Naomi are a bit bemused. David reads out some comments which he's seen on social media about not finishing anything and talking over guests. They talk about getting reviews, Chortle forums and if they're comfortable being podcasters. They play the first christmas song then wonder how they can add some zest to the ep. Joe offers to drive around Brighton pointing out stuff. They play the second christmas song which Joe wrote in a blind panic when he thought the first song couldn't go out. Merch: https://chatabixshop.com/ Twitter: https://twitter.com/chatabix1 Instagram: https://chatabixshop.com/ Patron: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It's the 2nd round in the Battle of The Chatabands when David, Joe and music producer Steve Baker score three songs out of 10. David is feeling really uncomfortable in his role as a music reviewer. Steve kicks off by telling Joe that Roachford is playing in Brighton. They listen to each song in turn giving their opinion on each one. Joe thinks the first song is grungy, Steve thinks it has high energy while David struggles to review it as feels like a pratt. Joe thinks he loves the 2nd song. David tries to talk him out of liking it despite liking it himself and it reminding him of Biff Bang Pow. Steve agrees with Joe. Scores on the doors Joe gives 7.5, David gives an 8, Steve also gives an 8. David decides he's a punk as the final song sounds like the Pogues. Steve enjoyed it and Joe imagines listening to it in a seafaring pub in Ventnor. Steve reads out the final scores. Which one will be going through to the final ? Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Merch: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

When two pods collide, Luisa Zissman (The Apprentice) & Anna Williams (Celebs go Dating) have brought some high energy from LuAnna podcast. Luisa has been putting her Christmas tree up and tells them about her daughters trip to the dentist. Anna is using an AI Assistant but professes to being a tech dinosaur. They tell the lads about booking the London Palladium on a whim for their podcast live. David & Joe tell them about wanting to do a ladies night for a Chatabix Live but Luisa doen't think this is a good business model considering the demographic. They give the lads some business tips for doing a live show which they scribble down. Joe get's distressed when the girls exchange some filthy stories. As a trained Psychoanlyst, Anna offers David & Joe some life coaching to help them get over the fear of doing a live show. Energy levels are up (fleetingly). Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Merch: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Joe & David are eating chocolates for breakfast. David asks Joe if he's been surfing on the board he bought him and suggests sending it back if he hasn't. Joe's a guest on Off Menu Live and they discuss how Joe's feeling about it. They plan doing a 'Where's Joe Now' style recording before the show. David wants to watch Joe from the sidelines as he enters the stage but Joe's not keen, he's feeling stressed about the night and David's not helping. They reminisce about old comedy venues where they've both done stand up together. The postman walks in with a package. It's the new Chatabix caps ! David's wife Naomi has had a word with the Postman about not walking in when David's podding. It seems to have fallen on deaf ears. David forgets to get Ethan Lawrence on the pod so plug Ethan's new drama 'Boat Story' instead. Thanks to The Little House Dorset for the choccie treats: www.thelittlehousedorset.com Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Merch: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It's the first after dark episode which gets off to a miserable start. Andy is drinking whiskey, David has man flu and Joe is in a bad mood after playing badly at five-aside. By the end of the pod they are all laughing and happy again. David and Joe can't believe that Andy is best freinds with Robbie Williams and want to know all about his house, if he owns a phone charger and the size of his island. Andy asks David if he can get a part if one of his movies. After demonstrating his acting skills Joe and David come up with a film for him called 'Fingers & Thumbs' with Andy playing the part of Tony the Cobbler. Gossip turns to famous peoples houses they have been in and Bruce Forsyth stories. They suggest doing a 24 hour live pod on New Years eve and what that might look like before realising it's quite late and they should turn in. They bid each other goodnight, Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Today's specialist guest is Simon Price, a music journalist who has written a very thick A-Z book about The Cure. David's in his element. Joe's feeling a bit anxious as he doesn't know anything about The Cure but has prepared a quiz. David shows Simon his Cure memorabilia and Joe feels left out. He asks Simon if he likes Roachford. They talk about being a music reviewer and Joe confesses he used to buy copies of Melody Maker to appear cool. Simon tells them about his career and early life in the music industry when he used to put on gigs with Ricky Gervais. As expected, the chat turns to The Cure and Simon's book. Simon admits he's never actually met Robert Smith. They swap stories about the music industry. He tells them the artist formerly known as Prince used to be really good at basket ball. Joe asks them his quiz questions about The Cure. It's neck & neck between David and Simon. Find Simon's book 'Curepedia' here & info on his events https://linktr.ee/simonprice Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Joe talks about what it was like being on the Chris Moyles radio show and how busy he has been promoting his book. David is feeling positive and is grateful they are podcasters and the pod is doing well. He has a feeling that this ep will be in the top 50. David has arranged a surprise present for Joe which arrives in the middle of the recording. It's in a massive box which gives the game away a bit. They decide the pod should be rebranded as the Mid Life Crisis pod. David suggests some local options for Joe to do some training in his new found hobby. Joe is excited to try his pressie out. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

The first round of Battle Of The Chatabands - Joe & David have teamed up with music producer Steve Baker for an exciting new mini- series. They've asked for unpublished bands / songwriters to send songs to Chatabix and have chosen three at random to play live on the pod. One of the bands will get chosen to go through to the grand final at the end of the year (which hopefully will be judged by someone from the muso industry). The bands will be revealed live on the pod. David pretends he's submitted one of the songs. Joe struggles to review the songs from a technical perspective and David realises he's not very good at reviewing music. Luckily Steve Baker has a good technical and musical ear. Joe asks what would have happened if Lewis Capaldi hadn't been invented and gets confused between A&R and A&E. After much umming and ahhing they score each song for tingle factor but only one makes it through to the final. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Comedy actress Natasia Demitriou (What We Do In The Shadows & Stath Let's Flats) comes on the pod to give us a good talking to. Tash helps pin point why some of Chatabix makes absolutely no sense and suggests we at least number the eps. She calls David & Joe the Del Boy & Rodney of podding and highlights exactly what eps don't work telling them they need to focus. She also confirms that there isn't a Whatsapp group with her and her comedy friends called Chatadicks but David & Joe don't believe her. She eventually admits that it's the best podcast out there. They move on to discussing pest control and Tash struggles to tell them about what she's up to workwise because she can't stop giggling. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Joe does a shout out for his mum who wants a Chatabix mug and they talk about nice sounding surnames. David opens a package that he got from Weetabix. They are not really sure why they got sent a hamper of fourteen different types of weetabix but hope it's one step closer to getting a sponsorship deal. Joe is feeling his age at his 5 aside football as there are some new younger players. He decides to write a song with Eyes on Legs about being nearly 50. Joe re-tells a story he heard from a friends, friends dad about Robbie Williams allegedly bouncing on a sofa when he was 20. David does a bit of Black Adder, impersonating Rik Mayall. At the end we hear a little snippet from the Joe Marler Show Live recording which Joe recently went on. Listen to Joe on the full ep Joe Marler Show Live : https://pod.fo/e/1ffba6 Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Merch: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Joe's struggles to finish the surfing saga as it's been too long and he can't recreate the life changing moment when he was surfing in California. They quickly move on to how a bookcase stuffed full of books makes you feel intelligent. Joe's bookcase is cluttered with untidy books much to David's disgust. They talk about what it's like to retire and being free from the daily grind at a young'ish age but Joe worries about running out of money by retiring too young. Campervanning is suggested as a perfect post-retirement activity. David's been to Totnes market and tries to tell Joe about it. The surfing ep morphs into a cosy ep. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Comedian Iain Stirling is in his home studio which David & Joe are very excited about as this is where he records Love Island. Before they settle down Iain has to sort out his burrito delivery. They talk about ordering food in the day time. Joe asks Iain if he's ever had hemorrhoids. Iain thinks David is ripped, they discuss weight gain and Joe's concave chest. Moving on to comedy, they talk about the Chortle Student awards and being on the sold out board at Edinburgh Festival. (Joe's never been on it). Iain tells them about working in a clothes shop and gives them some shoplifting tips. They play a game of connecting words that Iain plays with his wife. David asks Iain what it's like to be hot property in the 'biz'. They chat about their processes for coming up with new material and end up workshopping about conkers. They play guess the weight of the burrito. Iain tells them about getting recognised by his voice in a kebab shop. Iain Stirling's 'Relevant' stand up tour starts March 2024, its going to be brilliant. https://www.iaindoesjokes.com/ Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Extra drivel today as we are joined by comedian and illustrator Henry Paker. He has a brilliant brain and is one of the Beans from the Three Bean Salad podcast. Henry did the illustrations for Joe's book 'My Autobiograpy' and is here to talk about what it was like making the book with Joe. However instead of talking about the book they reminisce about the heady days of stand-up. Henry has a lot of stories about cake, Russell Howard and comedy. When they eventually get on to the subject of the book they talk about who's name looks better on the front cover. Henry Paker's podcast is Three Bean Salad with Mike Wozniak & Benjamin Partridge. You can listen to it here (after you've listened to ours obvs) https://linktr.ee/threebeansalad Joe's book 'My Autobiograpy' is out on 9th Nov. Pre-order's & book signing details here: https://linktr.ee/joewilkinsonbook Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

We're back in SoCal and Joe's yet to stand on the surfboard. In today's ep Joe has his wetsuit on and begins the lesson on the beach. After putting their boards on a flat bit of sand the instructor Mark demo's how to jump up. Then it's Joe's go. David's draws parallels with how he felt about playing Cricket. Joe get's told to ping up to his knees, he talks David through step by step how hard this was for a 48 year old man. Joe finally get's in the sea but struggles to carry the board in the massive waves. As they hang out on the boards waiting to catch the big one Mark tells Joe his life story. Then it's time to surf ! Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Todays guest is a special surprise for Joe. It's someone he's wanted to talk to after watching a tv show. When the guest arrives Joe doesn't recognise them at first as they look very different from how they looked at the end of the TV Show. When the penny drops Joe get overexcited and flaps his arms around. He;s possibly more excited than when Roachford came on. There is so much Joe wants to know. They settle in for a lovely chat. Find out more about this surprise guest here (but listen to the ep first if you don't want to spoil the surprise): www.desertislandsurvival.com Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It's the second part of Joe's surfing story but before they pick up where they left off the lads have a little romanticise about what life would be like doing the pod if Joe was a surf dude and David was a muso tinkering with his guitar all day. Joe tells David about nervously walking along the beachfront in Carlsbad with a rolled up towel under his arm to meet Rusty who he has booked the surf lesson with. On arrival Joe's asked to change into a wetsuit which throws up loads of uncomfortable feelings and Joe secretly wishes the lesson would get cancelled as the waves are too big. As Joe enters the ocean the instructor Mark asks him if he's ever surfed before. Joe tells him no, definitely not, not even skateboarded mate, in the vague hope that he'd be impressed by how quick he picks it up. The midlife crisis has fully kicked in. Joe's about to ride his first wave - part 3 out on Thursday 2nd Nov. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It's the run up to the surf lesson: Joe's been on holiday to California and David wants to know all about it. Joe confesses he struggles to say LAX as it's embarrasing and babbles on about the Hollywood Sign, seeing Jared Leto's house and the 9 lane traffic on the freeway. Eventually they get to the meaty bit when Joe reveals he's had a surfing lesson at the end of the holiday. David is all ears. The discussion turns to mid life crisis's and Joe's surfboard being akin to David's new guitar. Joe tells David that he felt empowered having his surf lesson but now just feels embarrassed. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

It’s the second part of Joe and David’s mega-chat with last week’s surprise guest Lee Mack. Picking things up again, the talk turns to game shows, Lee’s brilliant 1% Club, Joe and David’s Pyramind idea and pitching new shows. Then it’s back to sit-coms with learning lines, script read-throughs, viewing figures, the challenges of recording with a live audience and casting David as a policeman in Not Going Out. There’s also some reminiscing about the 90’s stand-up scene, Lee’s early days starting out in comedy, the pleasures of podding and bizarrely, some damaged cushions that Joe and David begrudgingly agree to replace. Part one of this Ep with Lee Mack (ep 306) released 18th Oct 2023 if you want to listen to that first ! Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices

Off to a flying start, Joe has returned from holiday complaining about his ailments and then has trouble with his wifi booster. They talk about a recent visit to Spotify HQ, meeting Ben Foster and how nice the pulled pork was. David's intent on telling Joe about his window cleaning expertise again and when to use a chamois or a squeegee. They ponder over why they're not very snappy at podcasting and reflect on an old interview with James Acaster. They put it down to having slow brain speeds. David shows Joe his new guitar. Follow Chatabix on Twitter & Instagram: twitter.com/chatabix1 www.instagram.com/chatabixpodcast/ Patreon for early access to our eps: https://www.patreon.com/chatabix Crunchy fresh tees and hoodies: https://chatabixshop.com/ Contact us: chatabix@yahoo.com Learn more about your ad choices. Visit podcastchoices.com/adchoices