Close the Door: Game of Thrones, A Song of Ice and Fire Podcast

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Theon is a broken man, but he’s trying to come out. Every time we think Ramsay can't get any worse, he says "hold my beer." Is Roose a vampire? Comma says no. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Reek II. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 605

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. George is at his most heavy handed when he tells us this place is called the Sorrows, but he really does set a mood. Tyrion is homesick for Jaime and we’re as sad about it as he is. This is the worst Pirates of the Caribbean ride ever, and none of us buy that it ends with Tyrion dying. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Tyrion V. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 604

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. We're all lined up for dinner at White Harbor's very own Red Lobster (we hear the biscuits are great). Does Davos wear a WWSD bracelet? Wylla Manderly is the best, but the entire Merman Court deserves an Oscar. Can anyone give us the Bullet Points of Fire & Blood? #NotAllJareds Game of Thrones. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Davos III (repost). Originally recorded in 2018. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 603

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Hoarfrost doesn’t sound tasty, and neither does running out of rations. We’re hyper-focused on Rattleshirt’s new bling. Jon and Stannis: our favorite comedy duo. We want to send Jon to management school, and so does Bowen Marsh. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Jon IV. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 602

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Xaro Xhoan Daxos and Dany sit down to enjoy a very adult form of entertainment. Does Dany know what she's doing? Would the people of Westeros weep with joy should she show up? Where is Pyat Pree anyhow? A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Daenerys III. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 601

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Listener's choice for our 600th episode. Jaime’s sixth chapter in A Storm of Swords really is your favorite's favorite chapter, and we’re podcasting about it for our third or possibly fiftieth time. Consult us for all your original soundtrack needs. Everyone loves the Princess Bride, but can we really picture Cary Elwes as Jaime? Can we still be crazy shippers after a dozen years of Jaime/Brienne podcasting? Yes, apparently we can. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Storm of Swords - Special Jaime VI. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 600

Davos is in White Harbor at the diviest of dive bars, where the citizenry are talking about everything but Stannis. No one is getting any better with the endless speculation over Winds. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Davos II. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 599

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Join us as we sail with Tyrion down the turtle-infested river. Is Septa Lemore the friend we leer at along the way? Is Comma right about cyvasse being a viral sensation? Plus, all the turtle facts you can handle! A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Tyrion IV. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 598

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Bran chapters are magic. Literally. We love the lore, but damn is it getting dark in that cave. Literally and figuratively. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Bran II. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 597

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Reek may be hella smelly, but Theon is still shockingly strong. And, true to form, we feel bad for the mice? A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Reek I. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 596

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Dany just needs to go offline for awhile and stop reading the news. George may have written her chapters as an allegory of our endless mideast wars, but are they really more an allegory for why we don't have Winds yet? A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Daenerys II. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 595

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Jon is the new Davos. Have we ever thought about not burning everyone alive? This human sacrifice is only slightly more fun when we think it's Rattleshirt. Jon is definitely noticing Val, and Satin too. Lightbringer—quote, unquote. Jon and Stannis's relationship status is set to "it's complicated." We’re all so excited for never reading all the people burnings George planned for Winds. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Jon III. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 594

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. We’re learning all about wreckers over Davos’s bowl of tasty sisters soup. It’s fun to hear about Westerosi gossip with our favorite characters, we’re never tired of enjoying stories about Tywin’s death. So are squishers real? Dick Crabb would’ve loved this web fingered House Borrell situation. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Davos I. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 593

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Sometimes you look up and you see a Duck. Is sad sack Illyrio someone's daddy? We all want to forget the mummified hands. Tyrion's teenage undercover sewer training for warfare might come in handy. We're all taking Jon Connington seriously. Jon Connington is spectacularly unacquainted with Daenerys Targaryen. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Tyrion III. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 592

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. In the first of "Our Favorite Chapters" series, we explore the vaguely heroic patina of the Night's Watch, the sweetness of rancid butter and the nod that launched a thousand ships. Join us for kill the boying, baby switching, and block fetching, with an added bonus of diet Jaime himself: Ser Hyle Hunt. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Jon II (repost). Originally recorded in 2018. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 591

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Quentyn’s having a rough journey through Dance, and so are we tbqh. Dany's living in the worst episode of The Bachelor and she doesn't even know it. Never trust anyone who sets up a recruiting table. We struggle with the decades old question of what actual purpose Quentyn's chapters serve in the overall story of ASoIaF and our answer is: shrug emoji. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - The Merchant's Man (Quentyn I). Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 590

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. It's yet another hellish road trip, this time with Tyrion and Illyrio. Illyrio proves he is the king of "yes, and?" when it comes to grossness. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Tyrion II. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 589

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Bran and co. are on their way to meet the three-eyed crow in what sounds like The Donner Party, Westerosi style. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Bran I. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 588

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Jon's alarm clock works a little too well. How does the Stark sibling/direwolf sibling network work anyway? We don't endorse it but we kind of get why people ship Jon and Stannis. Does Mel want Jon to get shanked? A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Jon I. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 587

Spoilers, profanity, Jaime x Brienne. Proposing with shoes that don’t fit is certainly a choice. Sixth time is not the charm for Hizdahr. We’re just surprised Dany isn’t dropkicking some of these people. A Song of Ice and Fire. A Dance with Dragons - Daenerys I. Close The Door And Come Here - Episode 586